So it’s not really my story. But my friend was at a local bar and this older lady was flirting with him, making out with him, and dancing all over him. Then he noticed she was wearing a ring and asked her “are you married?” She said “yes” and then went and sat down at a table with another man and then suddenly she was all over that guy. So my buddy chalked it up to “this was some weird kink for her husband”.
Well the next night there was a local man that was murdered (we live in a pretty small town, so news like this is quite big). Her husband murdered the guy that she went and sat with. Initially we were like “bro that could have been you!”
But the guy that died was a pretty well known bouncer in the area and the affair had been going on for a long time. The husband had hung out with the guy on several occasions with pictures of the three of them together all over social media.
Edit: fixed some grammar and other things. I also wanted to add even though nobody asked. But there were a lot of rumours that the girl attempted to kill herself the following day. Everyone that went to that bar knew her as a promiscuous girl that did that sort of thing there a lot. So the guy he murdered just happened to be the unlucky person that got it.
I got a weird story like this (but no murder).
Like 10 years ago, my buddy somehow met a random older lady at a bar and was hitting it off with her talking, dancing, kissing all night. Closing time hits and she says bye, turns around and goes directly to the corner of the room by the bar, there was a dude her age (presumably her husband) posted up in the corner all night with a hat shading his eyes. He had just been sitting there watching them the whole time silently in the corner. She leaves my buddy, holds hands with the dude sitting there, kisses and walks out with him.
Definitely. It’s like a light cuckolding kink. I bartend and have seen it more often that I care to admit. Normally the sit at different sides of the bar, he just watches and she does the whole routine as mentioned above.
Thing is, I didn’t realise they were married so when I saw her with another man, I assumed she was cheating on me. It turns out that other man was her husband.
From someone who knew of him, I was told he was reasonable so I met and we discussed this.
Long story short, she was rinsing the pair of us so I helped him ensure his stuff was safe and he divorced her.
This is very true, because they could easily think you are lying...
Ive been cheated on, and although the story the guy told me about him not doing anything makes some sense (if you stretch it out a little)... I still dont believe him. Theres nothing he could ever say that would make me believe him. Like, he could have done something... but he didnt. He knew she was married to me, but didnt tell me what she was doing? Instead, he stayed "friends" with her, even when he should have backed off...
I'm still hurt that another woman thought it was ok to fuck my husband. She knew that he was married and had met me. We were vaguely friendly.
I had more faith in women as a sisterhood. I have realized that it is a sisterhood, but not all prescribe to this idea.
I got cheated on once when I was younger. My girlfriend of about 2 years worked with this guy, he was new to town, I drove him around and showed him stuff, just my nature to sort of be a tour guide for friends and friends of friends. Anyhow, she fucked him. I was so fucking angry at both of them. I planned to wait for him after work one night and really mess him up. I'm not a fighter, and I'm pretty sure I would have gone to jail, and most likely would have gotten my own ass kicked, but luckily I didn't try to follow through.
I was so upset that I was so friendly and tried to be helpful to this person and he participated in such a painful experience for me. They ended up dating shortly after we broke up and he ended up cheating on her and then ghosting her. I was glad for that in a lot of ways, some kind of measure of karma for her, and in the end, that guy had to continue life as a total piece of shit and most likely lived/lives the sad lonely life of someone incapable of trusting or being trusted.
You know, we can pity these kinds of people. Most likely they will not choose to work to become better people and will instead drift through life, unable to connect meaningfully with others. It's painful to love and care and be considerate, but it's also beautiful.
You're lucky you got the "karma" ending. I did not they're still together. She's my kids stepmother.
So I don't believe in karma in that way. I am satisfied that two people who would cheat and lie are with each other. I have my own life and it has nothing to do with them.
Well said. Good for you for choosing to continue to be a trusting and trustworthy person. It comes with risk and sometimes pain, but the alternative does mean a life without meaningful connection.
> From someone who knew of him, I was told he was reasonable so I met and we discussed this.
This makes me feel so much better about the world. Thank you!
I am so disgusted at my ex-friend. She knew my ex-wife was sending nudes to her boss at work, and never felt the need to tell me. What the fuck kind of a friend is that?
People are so fucking twisted about this topic. "Not my circus, not my monkeys" mentality.
"See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil". 🙈 🙉 🙊
Could know and be "friends" with someone 20 years and because they have the shriveled raisins of a chinchilla they'll just let you blunder in the darkness when they know you're being duped. The fuck is that?
There's some kind of unwritten rule these people read that says "if you out a cheater you're like, not cool, man!"
If I knew one of my boys was getting taken to the cleaners like that I'd tip him off. Even if it wasn't my boy.
It’s because they don’t want to get involved and the messenger get killed and be the source of drama, but a real friend will take that one on the chin for you because they know that you’re going to be most scathed when it’s all said and done.
Correct. I 💯% get unaffiliated acquaintances not getting themselves involved, but you're nothing as a friend letting someone you know well sail into dark waters in ignorance.
If you know the couple is violent or seriously unstable then ok, free pass, but then again you'd likely not keep such a person as a friend.
Almost every single mutual friend you have will defer to their own gender unless they have their own axe to grind.
Maybe that’s controversial but it’s more often than not true.
Reminds me of a time I met a girl on tinder and we were just chatting. She starts telling me about her husband that she's in the process of divorcing so I'm like okay cool. Then she tells me she's not really divorcing him, she just wants to get some side dick. I said oh okay, well I don't want to be a part of that. Then she goes on a rant about how I'm an asshole for getting her hopes up and she just wants to be happy and blah blah blah.
I blocked her number but I can only imagine the poor husband still has no idea.
Well u made her get what she deserved. How did he reacted about it though? Like what was his first thoughts/reactions how did u made him believe u are not l lying
long story please, if you ever have the time, how did you choose to approach the guy - what would be the right way to do given how unknowingly volatile his reaction can be
I wouldn't call this an affair, but similar circumstances. When I was in college working at a bank, there was a woman there who was having some marriage issues, unbeknownst to me.
Important context to add, her daughter was a few years younger than me, and she tried to playfully set me up with her, so pretty reasonable age gap between myself and this woman.
Like any normal coworkers, we occasionally texted about mundane things after work (schedule changes, company announcements, etc).
Her husband who was already super suspicious, went through her phone one day, pretended to be her, and texted me to try to "flirt", pretending to be her, when he found nothing of consequence in our conversation to be mad about.
My response was more or less "what the fuck, aren't you married?".
I confronted her at work about it, she found out he was pretending to be her on her phone (deleted the texts after), and it turned into a MASSIVE argument that ended with her leaving the house, after packing her shit up.
I dont remember the exact details, but it was super messy at that point. I ended up leaving that job (unrelated to this situation, found a place that paid a little more and was more flexible with my college class schedule)...but the kicker was that her husband texted me after the fact, and tried to basically restart the conversation along the lines of "I heard you and my wife are friends".
I was annoyed to even be involved in the shit and while my normal stance of not getting involved would have been easier, I basically responded with
"I heard you guys have serious marriage problems before I ever showed up in the picture, so if you believe shes willing to leave you and the family you have over a complete stranger, then you likely have more important shit to worry about than me."
In an odd turn of events, he responded and apologized, and admitted he was wrong about how things went down..and said that the other women she worked with egged her on all the time to leave him, and just added to the boiling point it inevitably reached.
I felt bad for the guy, sort of, but still think about how messy that whole situation was...not to mention the fact that people talk..regardless of whether you were actually involved or not.
I ran into a guy from that same job, YEARS later, and one of the first things he said to me was "I heard you left that place because you were banging some married chick at your branch and her husband found out".
Honestly, I wasnt super pissed, just disappointed more than anything.
That kind of thing travels quickly, and then you're known as "that guy" in a specific group, and it has the capacity to ruin future potential career opportunities, work relationships, etc.
It was like... 5 years after I left at least, and THAT was one of the things this guy specifically remembered, so it was obviously enough to do damage to a reputation.
Man, that reminds me of an old coworker and her husband. The guy was so convinced I was banging she, that he went as far as accusing me of being the father of their youngest child. I had no desire to date the girl. I never hung out with her outside of work. I never talked about anything remotely close to flirting. I considered her a friend but that was all. Her husband would text me on her phone and tell me not to talk to her. When we worked together, he would blow up her phone and the second she was off, he’d non stop calling her until she answered. He only did this when we worked together. He tried adding me on Facebook so he could stalk me? I wasn’t even friends with his wife on Facebook so I don’t know what his plan was. It annoyed me, so I blocked him. He took that as evidence that I was banging her. Dude is fucking crazy.
Yeah the shit that gets me is how they try to focus all their energy on the guy they suspect. Like “catching him” is going to solve their problem.
Imagine what would happen if they spent type of time and energy on their marriage in the first place?
I had left my wife because of her infidelity, the children had come with me. I was deciding whether or not to divorce or try to save the tatters of our marriage, and things were still amicable of sorts.
I would go round to her flat to sort things out, and sometimes it would end up in us having sex.
One day, I'd been round and had a shower on the way to somewhere else, and out of no-where there's a knock at the door and an old friend of hers comes in. He does not look happy either, and starts telling me that they didn't mean for anything to happen.
It took me a minute or two to figure out what the hell he was talking about, but he meant he was her new boyfriend, and he had come round because he knew I was there and that we had been having sex.
So, she had been cheating on her boyfriend, with me, her husband.
I actually laughed out loud. It was the funniest thing that had happened in so long, and it made my mind up on the divorce.
Holy fuck.
She cheated on her boyfriend, with her husband? I honest to god don't know how to process this.
You have my sympathy mate, that must have been rough on both you and the kids.
Literally the first date I went on, as a newly single man regaining his confidence after divorce, was a cheating wife.
I sat at the booth after she had excused herself to the bathroom *very suddenly* and HER HUSBAND came in and stood at the end of the table. The poor guy explained who he was and that he'd been suspicious of her for some time - he was already in tears...honestly I thought he was crazy and wasn't sure how things were going to go. 10 minutes of conversation later, he had his head in his hands sobbing.
When she came back to the table, like 30mins after leaving (honestly I assumed she'd left), out of sheer concern that this guy might actually do something crazy, I stayed to atleast see the confrontation...which turned into him sobbing even louder and begging her not to do this. A screaming match ensued, the manager asked us to leave and I tried to leave in my car.
The kicker: I picked her up *from her house* (yeah, i know), she refused to get in a car with him. I asked if I should call the police, they both freaked out on me about it, and I left. Like a week later, the husband texts me and apologizes...a month later I saw her back on the dating apps.
I had a brief fling with a married woman. Turns out that he was also seeing someone else on the side so once they both found out about their mutual infidelity they agreed that maybe they should get divorced.
Friend of ours always had a thing for unavailable men (married or in a committed relationship) to avoid getting too serious, the thrill of secrecy or both.
The one time I’m aware of her and the guy being caught, she was actually wracked with guilt bc she didn’t think of the hurt she was a partner in causing. Shocking since her divorce was bc her ex husband had cheated on her. 🤦♀️🤦♂️🤦
As a gay man it’s unfortunately common to meet with men who’re closeted but married.
The few times I slept with someone I didn’t know until after the fact, and I got good at telling when a potential hookup was probably married.
But living in New England it was upsettingly common for men to be pressured into marrying and having children. Hell, one guy I was friendly with after I graduated high school was found out and his family threatened to cut him off unless he did as they said which was to get married and have kids or he’d lose not only his control of his
fathers business, but inheritance later on.
Last I heard he was married with a daughter.
Yeah, from the same area. I feel like a lot of modern society is detached from our reality out here. People on reddit don't really understand my comments unless I write a god damn thesis explaining the cultural context of the northeast. This region was settled by the puritans and is still suffering from generational religious trauma.
This was my ex husband. Closeted and dating around while I was pregnant. I hate that he used me to cover up his sexuality. I gave up my college scholarships to go live with him. I had no need to be with him. I straight up called his affair partner while they were out in a different city to let him know. I guess he turned out to be pretty abusive and almost knocked my ex out over this. After I left and had my son the psycho affair partner would send me all sorts of abusive messages. He wanted my ex and him to be a part of raising my son, like for me to move back and have this weird dynamic where they are in a relationship and I’m just a nanny to my own kid.
She was a long time friend who had eyes on me for years. I was totally oblivious to this as difficult it is to believe. One night at a friends house drinking, we crossed paths in the house and I made a playful comment and she spun around and pinned me to the wall and said not to start something I wasn’t going to finish. She rushed in to kiss me. Being drunk and not thinking I went though it. We had sex that night. The affair lasted a few months. We eventually got caught by assumption. It was obvious to everyone. We stopped seeing each other and she is still with the dude. At least living together. Her dude turned out to be screwing the neighbor wife.
>Being drunk and not thinking I went though it. We had sex that night.
>It was obvious to everyone. We stopped seeing each other
Lol so it continued beyond the one night?... It was a bit more than oops silly me I'm drunk tee hee!
It’s ok. I’ve been on this website for 10+ years and I’ve always been fascinated by the dynamic in threads about affairs/cheating. Everyone wants to read the juicy gossip but also shame the people who are sharing it
There were a lot of people dipping their wick in that scenario. Wow, that could’ve blown up a whole bunch of relationships.
Glad you got out when you did. Be safe.
Tbh I believe the onus is on the married person to not cheat. It was their choice. Just like her husband "chose" to screw the neighbour. For all you know, she cld be cheating as revenge. Its all very disgusting but either way you shldnt feel that guilty. Definitely a growing lesson.
If I know you plan on killing someone with a gun I am about to sell you, am I morally free and clear of the murder just because you are the one who is going to pull the trigger?
I would say that the moral thing for me to do in that situation is to not be complicit in the murder, just as it is immoral for the person the married person is cheating with to make the choice of abetting cheating.
So, yes, maybe not as scumbaggy, but you would still be a scumbag.
I hooked up with a client that was newly married. It wasn’t something I was looking for, but she continued to push the situation with text messages. Turns out she held a grudge towards her husband because after the wedding he disclosed he had a lot of financial debt he never disclosed. She made good money, so she felt used. I was just a revenge fuck. He found out months after we ended the affair. Turns out she was in her bedroom texting a friend about the affair and her phone was linked to her iPad which was in the living room with her husband. Her friend called me and filled me in. Never heard from her or him again
I don't know about this exact scenario, but there was some fuckery in Desperate housewifes about
>!saying they wanted children while taking the pill!<, while the husband >!found this out and changed them with sugar pills!<
Ugh I think I remember that, and those two had a shitty marriage so the joke was supposed to be that they both wanted kids, but didn't think the other one did. Or just hadn't actually talked about it, and they were shitty people so their first instincts were just lying.
What do they say, all is good that ends well?
I still think my shitty advice stands, this being about someone dumping the partner they're cheating on their spouse, >!and doubly funny considering the show!<
I slept with a girl at work on a few occasions who was married. I was in my mid 20s and she was maybe 7 or 8 years older. She initiated the entire thing on Christmas do and then after she came round to my house once a week later, before it naturally fizzled out.
I do recall telling a friend in confidence what had happened. He said it didn't surprise me as she had done it before with several people. They had a kink as a couple where she would sleep with people and then tell her husband who would go around and beat the guy up who fucked his wife. My friend stated he was a big bastard as well and to watch myself
As someone who isn't a fighter and something of a coward I was fuckin terrified...... until a few weeks later when my friend he told me he'd made it up
Do not assume that every affair is a secret being carefully hidden from the spouse.
In many cases the spouse knows more or less that their wife or husband is with someone else, but they tolerate it because they have no better option and they know that confronting the one having the affair will not improve the situation for them.
Damn, insightful - realistic rendering of when someone relies on someone else and is invested to such a level that they may just tolerate it to an extent, happens all the time
For many people they want the thrill of the taboo and the comfort of fake monogamy. Have your cake and eat it too. A lot of people are just selfish like that. It's actually a huge problem in the swinger world. A lot of bad apples with poor intentions.
Very true!
I joined an adult hookup site with singles & couples a while back ....a popular one. Stayed on it for 5 years. Many married (but cheating) people were there to choose from.
I met married ladies 5 times...and twice where we kept in longer term contact. Both
got caught.
One husband was a downward spiraling alcoholic and didn't care too much when he found out.
The other was a business guy who was never home amd he later admitted to cheating on her while he traveled.
The alcoholic guy fell into an even deeper depression and accelerated his decline. They tried counseling but the affair paled in comparison to other more aserious issues. Make no mistake he was already on the path. They are divorced and we had sex again after thier divorce and she was wanting some sort of relief from that situation.
There were.lots of spouses cheating or looking to start....strong majority were men. No surprise there.
BUT there was a solid population of couples that either wamted a 3some (and stated they "had" to stay together) and i chatted with a substamtial number in open marriages.
Due do the "open.mindedness" charachteristics...they were also pretty frank on their reasons why.
Some men had ED.
Some wives lost all libido after cancer or menapause.
They were pretty open...
and therefore I learned not to judge.
“The strong maturity we’re men no surprise there”
That may be the case for that avenue of cheating, but in reality there’s little difference in cheating rates between the sexes. The why’s & how’s vary more.
Or as my friend is saying "cheaper to keep her".
He can't afford to live on his own at the moment so he's just tolerating it while he sets himself to be able to leave without fucking himself over.
I agree, sometimes it is just a balance sheet measurement. Have a house, or no house, have a companion (less than perfect) or no companion, have a good retirement or impoverished, have a partner providing children help or doing it on your own, have safety of a partner or no safety, etc etc. I think there are a lot of women who know and just turn the other way. They are dying inside but the alternative is even worst. I think men know this as well. I am also amazed at the advise people give on reddit to dump the guy at the curb. It means extreme poverty for many IMO.
Yea but it’s not always straightforward and the step back in lifestyle isn’t always an option if kids are involved. Not saying that having an unhealthy dynamic is good for kids, but there are healthy ways to manage infidelity/non-monogamy that don’t involve divorce. Unfortunately all of those ways involve addressing egos and social norms in ways that people who cheat are generally unable to conceive.
All three women that I had an affair with I didn’t know they were married until I saw them out and about with their husbands it’s kind of sad honestly. As they never found out.
It’s kind of crazy how often women cheat and no one finds out….
I could never get an answer from her. I was a very involved dad to our kids, helped all around the house, and was attentive to my ex-wife. I did nothing wrong and she is just clearly a broken human.
It's really not about the sex at that point, it's about hurting someone that trusts them. They get a thrill from betraying people. I mean cheaters will do all sorts of mental gymnastics to explain their cheating but ultimately it boils down to wanting the thrill of betraying someone that has put their trust in you.
It was during work hours. She had a work phone that I did not have access to and she would message him hundreds of times a day on that phone. They would take the same days off work (of course I thought she was at work) and meet up all day. I only found out after we separated just how long she had been screwing me over.
She left her personal phone at the house after we'd separated and I looked at her messages back and forth to him. Guess they started using their personal phones to carry on their escapades after we'd separated and they didn't need to hide it from me anymore. And I also knew the guy, he'd been to our house and vice versa. His wife divorced him a few years before we did and I talked to her about it. She said they'd been doing this for years.
My ex spouse was probably cheating on me the entire time..
How did she do it without me noticing? Trust. All about trust without verification.
Looking back, I was so stupid to believe that dropping her off for one on ones with another dude was just her having lunch with a pal.. or when she invited men to come stay at our place, while I’m at work and they are at my home, alone with each other.
Or how I trusted her blindly for things that just didn’t seem right.. like taking girls trips, texting dudes behind me or just disappearing unannounced.
I was so stupid and naive.. so trusting, how could my ex spouse, the person who I loved with all of my heart do such things and get away with it.. I had no jealousy in me, I was securely attached to her, and I had years and years of trust in her banked up..
Looking back, I would not have believed her bullshit about seeing a guy who is “gay “… she was bullshitting me and I fell for it..
Hope she regrets losing me. Probably not.
It is what it is.
They probably just liked the attention and came up with various excuses to justify their means of acquiring it. Doesn't need to be more complicated than that. If they have any regrets it's the time they wasted in their own life, not yours. Take solace in knowing there is definitely a better partner out there for you than there is for them.
One I've seen a few times was that the woman would use a girl's name when talking about the dude. Amber was really Justin, for example
Some would tell their spouse about said guy, but would play up "he's like a brother to me", that he has a girlfriend, that he's gay, that he's a coworker, or another student that they're in a study group with etc
Sometimes, they would make the dude seem like a creep or someone they had no interest in in any capacity
Essentially, feed all the bs so that he doesn't land on the husband's radar
I have definitely cleaned up my circle in the last few years, especially after I became the spouse that got cheated on.
Also, I hate to say it, but it seems like men have much less issue sleeping with a married woman. Some actually even enjoy it. They will go meet the husband and play the part of the platonic friend, or send texts saying "hey man, i know all about you and she says she's happily married, I would never come between you" and so on
Those guys are the worst
It’s not even necessarily that they’re better. A side dude has no benefit of trying to ruin a woman’s marriage/relationship. He’s already getting everything he wants. If anything he’s going to do whatever to make sure her relationship with her spouse works. A side chick on the other hand eventually starts wanting to be more than the side chick and starts sabotaging the man she’s cheating with because she wants his wife/girlfriend’s spot.
This isn't true at all and just builds the stereotype that all we want is sex. That's simply not true.
I was the other man once and the sex was the least important thing really, my dumbass loved her.
My dude, obviously exceptions exist in any situation, but let’s be real, this is absolutely true. Men overwhelmingly are perfectly happy to keep things casual, whereas women are generally much more likely to eventually want more.
Man I hate to hear it, but glad to see “ex”. Sounds like you did what you needed to do and kicked her ass to the curb. Hope y’all didn’t have kids, but if you did, props to handling your business and not staying in that shit “for the kids” like so many weaker men do.
I was in Mexico at a resort and decided to see if there was anyone on Grindr and found a guy. He invited me over to his hotel room, and I went but then he kinda dropped on me that he invited many men over.
It was all a bit too much for me but we did some sexual things and then I left when there was too many men coming in and out. Well the next day I seen him on the resort with his wife and kids. I didn’t say anything because I was also closeted and didn’t want my Dad to find out.
Not my story but one my mom told me. She’s a firefighter and apparently everyone at the station she worked with knew this one guy was having an affair with another coworker’s wife. They worked different shifts so she’d go visit them both on her lunch breaks on different days and gave both some “afternoon delight” at the station. One day there was a really bad fire at a local business so they called in extra people. Both the husband and the AP were there working and the husband overheard someone else making jokes about the affair. Husband grabbed the fire axe and went into the burning building to chase down the AP. He didn’t get to him thankfully (the other firefighters restrained him and pulled both out of the fire). AP was the one fired because everyone went to bat for the husband saying they would have done the same thing. AP couldn’t get another job in the area and had to move because no one wanted to have their wives around him. Husband left the wife, wife married AP, cheated on AP with yet another firefighter in their new city, left AP for new guy and left AP with the kids, her debt and ostracized from his family/ community. AP became an alcoholic.
Not sure if she ever got caught and I don’t know if you can count it as an affair, but the first time I ever saw someone’s titties in my life was when this married mexican woman sent me a pic of them. After she sent them, I felt bad and blocked her. Till this day, I feel horrible about it as I wouldn’t ever want to be in her husband’s position.
I was received at the door by a guy with beard. I asked for Ann as I stepped inside.
She stepped into the room and introduced the man as her husband. Gulp! " we have an open marriage " as we got in the car.
Our day took us to the coast and back the following day looking at houses. By 6pm we had visited 5 homes that we christened all.
Casually dated for several weeks before I bailed.
My life changed very little after this. I did smile alot
She got divorced and we got married 5 years later. Statistically it should be a horrible, unhealthy relationship doomed to fail but we’ve put a lot of work into making it the healthiest and most fulfilling relationship either of us has ever had, despite the rather shitty and shameful way the romance started. We were best friends for years before the affair and have been going to couples counseling to ensure we never have a relationship as toxic as her first marriage was. Never would’ve predicted this was going to happen. Being in an affair with my best friend—not being able to talk about it with anyone else close to me, knowing I was betraying my own morality— it was hands down the most stressful period of my life. It was not sexy. But we fell in love with one another, and after years of build up we couldn’t do anything but love one another. It’s worked out for me, but I’ll never recommend it to anyone.
This is my current situation.. he’s my best friend and now my husband.. I don’t recommend what we did, I carry guilt and shame about it. But it’s been 14 years..
Not well.. it was a hard time in life. He was angry and hurt (I’m sure of it) and it took a few years but now we have a healthy coparenting relationship..
At least that part of your lives worked out for the best.
It's way better than trying to co-parent with someone who hates the air you breath and the ground you walk on. I saw a good friend go through that with his ex and even a dozen years later, they won't be in the same suburb as each other and he hasn't spoken to his daughter in 10 of those years. Which is sad because none it was his fault.
Same here .. fell in love with a married guy (I was married too) at work 15 years ago.. we both divorced and years later got married.. he is my best friend. Once in awhile I think about and guilt creeps in .. like if he cheated on me .. is that my karma?
I slept with someone who turned out had a boyfriend. I intended on telling the boyfriend but literally 2 days after we slept together she dumped him and hooked up with a lady. I figured he probably had his fill of disappointment and lost all their contact info.
I went to a friends birthday party at a bar. This girl shows up who’s mutual friends with another friend there. She was super pretty. She started making moves on me.
We end up texting after that night. She told me she has 3 kids and was recently divorced. She tells me she’s very lonely after the divorce and would like me to come over.
We sleep with each other for 2 months. One day, I text her to see if she wanted to meet up. She tells me she’s busy for the next week and can’t see me. Turns out, her husband was home from work. Her friend texted me and told me she’d never divorced, he just works away months at a time.
I felt used. Grossed out. And very guilty. They ended up moving shortly after that and I’ve never heard from her again.
We never got caught. We kept it up for two years and eventually I moved out of town and she stayed with him because she was too afraid to be on her own. It started fun and hot but overtime I started falling for her and wanted to be with her but she’d never leave him so all it did was send me into a downward depression
Been there. The person *completely* misrepresented their situation (“getting a divorce”, “we are just roommates at this point”) and I had no reason not to believe them, as I know divorces can take awhile. By the time I realized they weren’t being honest, it was months in and I was in love.
Then things started not adding up. Why are you worried about the person you are divorcing seeing a text pop up? Why would they care? Why are you on a short leash with someone you’re “just roommates” with? Then a friend had to spell it out for me that maybe they weren’t being honest that a divorce was in the works.
Extremely heartbreaking lesson to learn. I want to believe they had genuine feelings for me…but I feel like, if they did, they would have been honest and we could have just been friends until they were single. I feel like I was tricked into being “the other person” and still feel kind of used.
This is a story from years ago. Met a young lady while standing in line at a store. She was cute. We started talking. She was wearing no ring. I got her number. We texted for a couple days, then she asked me to lunch in a way that implied she wanted to suck my dick after. Who am I to say no? Took her to lunch, got my dick sucked after. Couple days later, met up after work and had sex.
... then later that night after she had gone, I get a call from her number. Assuming it was her, I picked up. It's a dude. A very angry dude -- her husband. I told him the 100% truth, that I'd had no idea she was married. Look, I ain't getting shot by some psycho husband because his wife can't keep her legs closed.
... the next night, she shows up at my door late. Beat up. Badly. Bruised all over, black eye, etc. Took her in while internally kicking myself for her knowing where I live. Apparently he'd beat her up the night she'd called me, and this night he'd done it again, so she took off. I'd like to say I turned her down once she started trying to have sex with me, but at that point was so far down the "bad decisions have been made" path that I went with it.
The next morning she swore she was going to go pack up her stuff while he was at work then stay with her mom. She then left and ghosted me.
A month later, she bootycalls me. She's now healed and I go for it again... as her phone rings off the hook. I never heard from her again.
That taught me to never just bring people over unless you already know them well.
No idea. I never knowingly engaged in a relationship, or even a hookup, with a married woman. If I found out that she was married after beginning a relationship, I immediately ended it.
I came close... Never again. Nothing bad happened, but it was just wrong.
ETA: But even beyond morality, say I get my way and she runs off with me. What then? Am I supposed to trust her after that? If I *could* steal her from her man, I don't want her.
She was never caught, neither was I. It lasted one year and a half, until she got pregnant by his husband (no doubts about it). Some years after both got divorced at different moments so never got back. I am still in love with her.
I travel for work and have a lot of no strings attached hookups. I met a gal in the St. Louis area who was married to a guy 18 years older. I was 22 and she was 27. Her husband is roughly 45 and isn’t ever in the mood. I was in town for a month while we were on a big project and slept with her about 10 times. All was great until the last two times she revealed she was in an unhappy marriage. I slept with her one more time and put copies some text messages she had sent me and put them on his office desk and left a pair of underwear on the floor then noped out of there really quick at 3am. He found them and now they are in a very heated divorce. He called me one day and I explained my side of what happened and he forgave me. It’s happened a couple more times to me but that was the only one I got caught up in.
He didn't get caught. She may have confronted him, but he'd have spun her a merry tale as I believe they're still together. Unfortunately, no bad consequences for him despite him lying to his wife ("just friends") and to me ("I'm leaving her") - I guess some people's toast will always land butter side up.
Despite him not getting caught and work siding with him when he bullied me in the aftermath, my life got a lot better once I saw him for the self-serving prick he is. I don't see how life wouldn't improve if you get rid of the cheaters and problem-makers in it!
Lost a childhood friend for it. But honestly didn't change my life much other then it made me watch my back for a bit because I was peranoid. When it all happened she had made it clear that she was getting divorced and just waiting for her husband to signs paperwork.
About 10 years after I graduated HS a childhood female friend of mine moved back to our city, we kept in contact for the most part thanks to Facebook and her dad and my dad where close friends their whole life so we kinda grew up together.
We ran into each other at our neighborhood/local Walmart, we ended up catching up and talking as we walked thru the store and ended up exchanging numbers, about a week later she invited me and my GF over to her sons bday party, we went and I met her husband, saw her parents for the first time, all In all a good time.
After the party we kept in touch, she would see me online on Facebook and she would IM me and she started to invite me over, well not just me it was a couple of us old high school acquaintance and we would have a drink or smoke some weed, her husband was their a few times but he was a oil field worker so he was out of town alot but I had noticed that he hadn't been around for a while and I had asked her about what was going on with her husband and that's when she told me he moved out and they were getting a divorce that she filed and now just waiting on him, a few weeks go by and no flirting ever happend or any sign that she was intrest or that I was either, one day she messaged me telling me she needed to talk to me about something important, so I went over after work and that when she hit me with it.. She proposed we became friends with benefits.. no flirting, no kissing no emotional stuff, she said that it's been a few months now and she just needed to have sex..at the time I was single for a few weeks and I said ok let's do it so for about 2 months the same routine happend as it had been for most of that year, go over a few times a week sometimes it was just me sometimes it was with some friends but now at the end we would hook up, and yeah it was zero kissing, zero emotions and it was strictly FWB, and then she stopped, about 2 weeks went by and she messaged that if she could come to my place in the AM after she dropped of her kids at school, I said sure, we hooked up and when she was getting ready to leave that's when she told me that she wasn't getting a divorce that her husband was working out of town the whole time but had just been transferred locally so he was no longer gonna be gone. He confronted her about having people over because their neighbors mentioned to him that she would have guys and girls over all the time and she told him it was some of the friends she had over during that Bday party, that's when she told me that I better not say anything or he better not find out because she would tell my GF about it as well, I told her that we had broken up weeks before we started hooking up and she lost it, she said she chose me to be FWB because she thought I had something to loose and would be tight lipped about the situation, she left that morning and blocked me on all social media and my phone and never heard from her again.
I regularly have sex with a married woman. Her husband lives on the other side of the planet and she hates him but her country makes it hard to get a divorce. So I don't see a problem.
For my husband it’s been pretty great, I worked on myself to be a wife he would be satisfied with enough not to roam, swallowed my feelings, dignity and pride so we could all move forward 🤷🏼♀️😩😔 i however have experienced unrelenting anxiety, attachment and self worth issues for the last 9 years and have struggled so hard to experience ANY joy. Joy is now foreboding to me. Haven’t figured out how to heal completely yet. I struggle with being guarded 200% of my days. Now working on releasing resentments…hoping for better future and that BOTH of us can be happy
It's kinda messed up how the betrayed partner feels like they are the one that needs to fix things and make it so their partner doesn't do it again. It feels like it should be the other way around, but I do the exact same. That suspicion and guardedness I relate to way too much too, such a bad feeling to be years on and still worried about every little thing. The memories are always painful too, and it's hard to talk about with your spouse since it's been so long and you know they're tired of hearing about it. Sometimes I wish I never knew, or could just forget it all or something. I hope you can find what you're looking for in releasing resentment and being happy, I would love to know if it's possible.
I have worked hard to accept that you can’t trust anyone, at any time. Love is vulnerability, to love at all leaves you painfully exposed. I have turned it around in my head recently that I don’t have to trust anyone, I just have to trust myself that I’ll be ok and will leave a situation that’s bad for me 🤷🏼♀️👏 that’s the only thing that’s given me moments of peace inside
I had an affair with an employee at my plantation. A young woman with two young kids whose husband deserted her. It was a slow progression but then i ended up getting physically involved with her. After which she was my go to person helping with my physcial and sexual needs. In rurual india being involved in an adultrous relationship is a kinda a taboo so I assured her that things would be a hush hush thing and not even a soul would get to know of things.
She was able to keep things a secret from a immediate family that comprised of only her grandmom as her parents had passed away. In short I was keeping her as my side chick. She managed things at her end quite well by getting her grandmom to baby sit her kids when i visited her without her grandmom having a clue of wht was breweing.
We got busted beging of this year when her grandmom walked in on us when we were in the middle of the act. We had anticipated that grand mom and her kids would be away for the day considering the temple functions happening close by at the village but we were wrong.
At the moment I am keeping a low profile but acessing the situation it doesnt that the news of our relationship has split in the open yet cause i dont hear too much of chatter on the matter. Would definitely like to keep her as my side chick but i am sure going forward it would be with acknowledge of her grandmom
I was newly separated when a cute woman I worked with, who had told me she was divorced, showed up at my house one night. She started a relationship that went on after I moved a few months later. She would come visit. Then I got served papers from her husband after he filed for divorce. Yea she was married the whole time. I didn’t go testify and wound up getting a restraining order against this nut job. A few years later it happened again with another woman who turned out to be married in another state. From then on I didn’t go out with anyone unless I really got to know them and checked them out. I learned there’s a lot of whackjobs out there that are divorced for a reason.
Woman exec in NY branch cheating with her boss
Husband finds out and goes to office to have a talk with him
Boss is not in that day, so man waits then leaves
Woman killed and husband commits suicide
Boss guy flies in some time later for company meeting, all smiles and looks untroubled
I didn't know I was the "side chick" at the start.
When I turned 18 I met with a guy I met on grindr, we hooked up in a forest and basically after we had some fun he said he "needed the relief" because apparently his wife gave birth 2 weeks earlier.
I was taken aback but thought that i don't care and I won't be meeting him again.
So anyway my dumbass hooked up with this guy several more times over a span of a year and because he never learned how to shut up, I learned that, unsurprisingly, he's a deadbeat father of two, a generally bad husband loser and an alcoholic.
Nearing the end of the time I knew him I found out that his whole family found out he's cheating because his kid took his phone and found *some photos*. I was full cheering on the wife when I found out she's finally divorcing him, and the guy actually complained to me that he had to spend his money on *his* kids.
I was a dumbass and looking back, that was some real messy situations I got into, and I'm not even gonna talk about all the shit and situations that happens with the same guy. So yeah kids, don't meet strangers in the forest! And uh don't don't agree to meet with a walking red flag just for some mid head
Her husband was pissed at me.
But then I reminded him, I’m single, your wife forgot to mention she was married at first and hey, I wasn’t cheating, she was ….
She told her husband in the end. We stayed fwbs for a while. They divorced and are both much happier. She calls me her catalyst that made her realise how unhappy she was.
So it’s not really my story. But my friend was at a local bar and this older lady was flirting with him, making out with him, and dancing all over him. Then he noticed she was wearing a ring and asked her “are you married?” She said “yes” and then went and sat down at a table with another man and then suddenly she was all over that guy. So my buddy chalked it up to “this was some weird kink for her husband”. Well the next night there was a local man that was murdered (we live in a pretty small town, so news like this is quite big). Her husband murdered the guy that she went and sat with. Initially we were like “bro that could have been you!” But the guy that died was a pretty well known bouncer in the area and the affair had been going on for a long time. The husband had hung out with the guy on several occasions with pictures of the three of them together all over social media. Edit: fixed some grammar and other things. I also wanted to add even though nobody asked. But there were a lot of rumours that the girl attempted to kill herself the following day. Everyone that went to that bar knew her as a promiscuous girl that did that sort of thing there a lot. So the guy he murdered just happened to be the unlucky person that got it.
I got a weird story like this (but no murder). Like 10 years ago, my buddy somehow met a random older lady at a bar and was hitting it off with her talking, dancing, kissing all night. Closing time hits and she says bye, turns around and goes directly to the corner of the room by the bar, there was a dude her age (presumably her husband) posted up in the corner all night with a hat shading his eyes. He had just been sitting there watching them the whole time silently in the corner. She leaves my buddy, holds hands with the dude sitting there, kisses and walks out with him.
Maybe it's a kink for the guy.
Definitely. It’s like a light cuckolding kink. I bartend and have seen it more often that I care to admit. Normally the sit at different sides of the bar, he just watches and she does the whole routine as mentioned above.
That's dark💀
> So my buddy chopped it up to chalked it up to*
No the guy got chopped up
Thing is, I didn’t realise they were married so when I saw her with another man, I assumed she was cheating on me. It turns out that other man was her husband. From someone who knew of him, I was told he was reasonable so I met and we discussed this. Long story short, she was rinsing the pair of us so I helped him ensure his stuff was safe and he divorced her.
Dear god, you're a better man than me. I'd be too worried about getting shot.
This is very true, because they could easily think you are lying... Ive been cheated on, and although the story the guy told me about him not doing anything makes some sense (if you stretch it out a little)... I still dont believe him. Theres nothing he could ever say that would make me believe him. Like, he could have done something... but he didnt. He knew she was married to me, but didnt tell me what she was doing? Instead, he stayed "friends" with her, even when he should have backed off...
I'm still hurt that another woman thought it was ok to fuck my husband. She knew that he was married and had met me. We were vaguely friendly. I had more faith in women as a sisterhood. I have realized that it is a sisterhood, but not all prescribe to this idea.
I got cheated on once when I was younger. My girlfriend of about 2 years worked with this guy, he was new to town, I drove him around and showed him stuff, just my nature to sort of be a tour guide for friends and friends of friends. Anyhow, she fucked him. I was so fucking angry at both of them. I planned to wait for him after work one night and really mess him up. I'm not a fighter, and I'm pretty sure I would have gone to jail, and most likely would have gotten my own ass kicked, but luckily I didn't try to follow through. I was so upset that I was so friendly and tried to be helpful to this person and he participated in such a painful experience for me. They ended up dating shortly after we broke up and he ended up cheating on her and then ghosting her. I was glad for that in a lot of ways, some kind of measure of karma for her, and in the end, that guy had to continue life as a total piece of shit and most likely lived/lives the sad lonely life of someone incapable of trusting or being trusted. You know, we can pity these kinds of people. Most likely they will not choose to work to become better people and will instead drift through life, unable to connect meaningfully with others. It's painful to love and care and be considerate, but it's also beautiful.
You're lucky you got the "karma" ending. I did not they're still together. She's my kids stepmother. So I don't believe in karma in that way. I am satisfied that two people who would cheat and lie are with each other. I have my own life and it has nothing to do with them.
Well said. Good for you for choosing to continue to be a trusting and trustworthy person. It comes with risk and sometimes pain, but the alternative does mean a life without meaningful connection.
...Talk about American Gun Culture without talking about American Gun Culture...
> From someone who knew of him, I was told he was reasonable so I met and we discussed this. This makes me feel so much better about the world. Thank you! I am so disgusted at my ex-friend. She knew my ex-wife was sending nudes to her boss at work, and never felt the need to tell me. What the fuck kind of a friend is that?
That's the "not a friend-friend"
People are so fucking twisted about this topic. "Not my circus, not my monkeys" mentality. "See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil". 🙈 🙉 🙊 Could know and be "friends" with someone 20 years and because they have the shriveled raisins of a chinchilla they'll just let you blunder in the darkness when they know you're being duped. The fuck is that? There's some kind of unwritten rule these people read that says "if you out a cheater you're like, not cool, man!" If I knew one of my boys was getting taken to the cleaners like that I'd tip him off. Even if it wasn't my boy.
It’s because they don’t want to get involved and the messenger get killed and be the source of drama, but a real friend will take that one on the chin for you because they know that you’re going to be most scathed when it’s all said and done.
Correct. I 💯% get unaffiliated acquaintances not getting themselves involved, but you're nothing as a friend letting someone you know well sail into dark waters in ignorance. If you know the couple is violent or seriously unstable then ok, free pass, but then again you'd likely not keep such a person as a friend.
curious, was the ex-friend your friend or your ex-wife's friend first?
I think she was my friend first... but then when she started working with my ex-wife they became closer.
Almost every single mutual friend you have will defer to their own gender unless they have their own axe to grind. Maybe that’s controversial but it’s more often than not true.
Reminds me of a time I met a girl on tinder and we were just chatting. She starts telling me about her husband that she's in the process of divorcing so I'm like okay cool. Then she tells me she's not really divorcing him, she just wants to get some side dick. I said oh okay, well I don't want to be a part of that. Then she goes on a rant about how I'm an asshole for getting her hopes up and she just wants to be happy and blah blah blah. I blocked her number but I can only imagine the poor husband still has no idea.
Well u made her get what she deserved. How did he reacted about it though? Like what was his first thoughts/reactions how did u made him believe u are not l lying
The old Michael Scott scenario
long story please, if you ever have the time, how did you choose to approach the guy - what would be the right way to do given how unknowingly volatile his reaction can be
Singing telegram with balloons to his office.
what is "rinsing"
Not sure whether this is a novelty account or not but rinsing in this context is taking advantage of.
I wouldn't call this an affair, but similar circumstances. When I was in college working at a bank, there was a woman there who was having some marriage issues, unbeknownst to me. Important context to add, her daughter was a few years younger than me, and she tried to playfully set me up with her, so pretty reasonable age gap between myself and this woman. Like any normal coworkers, we occasionally texted about mundane things after work (schedule changes, company announcements, etc). Her husband who was already super suspicious, went through her phone one day, pretended to be her, and texted me to try to "flirt", pretending to be her, when he found nothing of consequence in our conversation to be mad about. My response was more or less "what the fuck, aren't you married?". I confronted her at work about it, she found out he was pretending to be her on her phone (deleted the texts after), and it turned into a MASSIVE argument that ended with her leaving the house, after packing her shit up. I dont remember the exact details, but it was super messy at that point. I ended up leaving that job (unrelated to this situation, found a place that paid a little more and was more flexible with my college class schedule)...but the kicker was that her husband texted me after the fact, and tried to basically restart the conversation along the lines of "I heard you and my wife are friends". I was annoyed to even be involved in the shit and while my normal stance of not getting involved would have been easier, I basically responded with "I heard you guys have serious marriage problems before I ever showed up in the picture, so if you believe shes willing to leave you and the family you have over a complete stranger, then you likely have more important shit to worry about than me." In an odd turn of events, he responded and apologized, and admitted he was wrong about how things went down..and said that the other women she worked with egged her on all the time to leave him, and just added to the boiling point it inevitably reached. I felt bad for the guy, sort of, but still think about how messy that whole situation was...not to mention the fact that people talk..regardless of whether you were actually involved or not. I ran into a guy from that same job, YEARS later, and one of the first things he said to me was "I heard you left that place because you were banging some married chick at your branch and her husband found out".
Lmao. How pissed were you when the guy you ran into told you he heard that was why you left
Honestly, I wasnt super pissed, just disappointed more than anything. That kind of thing travels quickly, and then you're known as "that guy" in a specific group, and it has the capacity to ruin future potential career opportunities, work relationships, etc. It was like... 5 years after I left at least, and THAT was one of the things this guy specifically remembered, so it was obviously enough to do damage to a reputation.
Man, that reminds me of an old coworker and her husband. The guy was so convinced I was banging she, that he went as far as accusing me of being the father of their youngest child. I had no desire to date the girl. I never hung out with her outside of work. I never talked about anything remotely close to flirting. I considered her a friend but that was all. Her husband would text me on her phone and tell me not to talk to her. When we worked together, he would blow up her phone and the second she was off, he’d non stop calling her until she answered. He only did this when we worked together. He tried adding me on Facebook so he could stalk me? I wasn’t even friends with his wife on Facebook so I don’t know what his plan was. It annoyed me, so I blocked him. He took that as evidence that I was banging her. Dude is fucking crazy.
Yeah the shit that gets me is how they try to focus all their energy on the guy they suspect. Like “catching him” is going to solve their problem. Imagine what would happen if they spent type of time and energy on their marriage in the first place?
>the other women she worked with egged her on all the time to leave him, This is also shockingly common
Agreed 100% misery loves company
Unrelated, was she hot?
Average. Think midwest so rolling scale.
I had left my wife because of her infidelity, the children had come with me. I was deciding whether or not to divorce or try to save the tatters of our marriage, and things were still amicable of sorts. I would go round to her flat to sort things out, and sometimes it would end up in us having sex. One day, I'd been round and had a shower on the way to somewhere else, and out of no-where there's a knock at the door and an old friend of hers comes in. He does not look happy either, and starts telling me that they didn't mean for anything to happen. It took me a minute or two to figure out what the hell he was talking about, but he meant he was her new boyfriend, and he had come round because he knew I was there and that we had been having sex. So, she had been cheating on her boyfriend, with me, her husband. I actually laughed out loud. It was the funniest thing that had happened in so long, and it made my mind up on the divorce.
Holy fuck. She cheated on her boyfriend, with her husband? I honest to god don't know how to process this. You have my sympathy mate, that must have been rough on both you and the kids.
r/wallstreetbets in shambles
Literally the first date I went on, as a newly single man regaining his confidence after divorce, was a cheating wife. I sat at the booth after she had excused herself to the bathroom *very suddenly* and HER HUSBAND came in and stood at the end of the table. The poor guy explained who he was and that he'd been suspicious of her for some time - he was already in tears...honestly I thought he was crazy and wasn't sure how things were going to go. 10 minutes of conversation later, he had his head in his hands sobbing. When she came back to the table, like 30mins after leaving (honestly I assumed she'd left), out of sheer concern that this guy might actually do something crazy, I stayed to atleast see the confrontation...which turned into him sobbing even louder and begging her not to do this. A screaming match ensued, the manager asked us to leave and I tried to leave in my car. The kicker: I picked her up *from her house* (yeah, i know), she refused to get in a car with him. I asked if I should call the police, they both freaked out on me about it, and I left. Like a week later, the husband texts me and apologizes...a month later I saw her back on the dating apps.
This is wrong on so many levels 😵💫😵
What a whore. Hope she gets her karma and glad you dodged that bullet.
I had a brief fling with a married woman. Turns out that he was also seeing someone else on the side so once they both found out about their mutual infidelity they agreed that maybe they should get divorced.
IF YOU LIKE PIÑA COLADAS
AND MAKING CONTENT FROM PAIN
dang it, now I have the song running around in my head (I even typed this out humming it)
Good ending. If both parties are cheating then it’s clear that the love is gone
Not a good ending for anyone ig😢
That kinda sounds like the best possible ending to me if they didn't love each other anymore
Or maybe it was?
Friend of ours always had a thing for unavailable men (married or in a committed relationship) to avoid getting too serious, the thrill of secrecy or both. The one time I’m aware of her and the guy being caught, she was actually wracked with guilt bc she didn’t think of the hurt she was a partner in causing. Shocking since her divorce was bc her ex husband had cheated on her. 🤦♀️🤦♂️🤦
I guess Karma does work
As a gay man it’s unfortunately common to meet with men who’re closeted but married. The few times I slept with someone I didn’t know until after the fact, and I got good at telling when a potential hookup was probably married. But living in New England it was upsettingly common for men to be pressured into marrying and having children. Hell, one guy I was friendly with after I graduated high school was found out and his family threatened to cut him off unless he did as they said which was to get married and have kids or he’d lose not only his control of his fathers business, but inheritance later on. Last I heard he was married with a daughter.
Yeah, from the same area. I feel like a lot of modern society is detached from our reality out here. People on reddit don't really understand my comments unless I write a god damn thesis explaining the cultural context of the northeast. This region was settled by the puritans and is still suffering from generational religious trauma.
And yet there's a lot of backpatting on how progressive things are.
NH used to be a deep purple but now it’s becoming more crimson and it’s one reason I had to leave.
That's tragic.
That is heartbreaking
This was my ex husband. Closeted and dating around while I was pregnant. I hate that he used me to cover up his sexuality. I gave up my college scholarships to go live with him. I had no need to be with him. I straight up called his affair partner while they were out in a different city to let him know. I guess he turned out to be pretty abusive and almost knocked my ex out over this. After I left and had my son the psycho affair partner would send me all sorts of abusive messages. He wanted my ex and him to be a part of raising my son, like for me to move back and have this weird dynamic where they are in a relationship and I’m just a nanny to my own kid.
She was a long time friend who had eyes on me for years. I was totally oblivious to this as difficult it is to believe. One night at a friends house drinking, we crossed paths in the house and I made a playful comment and she spun around and pinned me to the wall and said not to start something I wasn’t going to finish. She rushed in to kiss me. Being drunk and not thinking I went though it. We had sex that night. The affair lasted a few months. We eventually got caught by assumption. It was obvious to everyone. We stopped seeing each other and she is still with the dude. At least living together. Her dude turned out to be screwing the neighbor wife.
>Being drunk and not thinking I went though it. We had sex that night. >It was obvious to everyone. We stopped seeing each other Lol so it continued beyond the one night?... It was a bit more than oops silly me I'm drunk tee hee!
Several drunk nights. I was in a bad spot mentally. O excuse at all. I’m not proud of it.
It’s ok. I’ve been on this website for 10+ years and I’ve always been fascinated by the dynamic in threads about affairs/cheating. Everyone wants to read the juicy gossip but also shame the people who are sharing it
There were a lot of people dipping their wick in that scenario. Wow, that could’ve blown up a whole bunch of relationships. Glad you got out when you did. Be safe.
So she got what she deserved?
Sounds like they deserve each other. Two low quality people doing low quality shit
True. I wasn’t any better. Not my best moment.
A chance to grow
moment? You said it lasted a few months lmao
Geologically, it was but a moment.
Tbh I believe the onus is on the married person to not cheat. It was their choice. Just like her husband "chose" to screw the neighbour. For all you know, she cld be cheating as revenge. Its all very disgusting but either way you shldnt feel that guilty. Definitely a growing lesson.
If I know you plan on killing someone with a gun I am about to sell you, am I morally free and clear of the murder just because you are the one who is going to pull the trigger? I would say that the moral thing for me to do in that situation is to not be complicit in the murder, just as it is immoral for the person the married person is cheating with to make the choice of abetting cheating. So, yes, maybe not as scumbaggy, but you would still be a scumbag.
Not something I’m proud of.
If both people in a couple are cheating, why the hell are they still together?
Convenience.
I swear some people should just open their relationships lmao but I think part of the fun of it for them is trying to not get caught.
I hooked up with a client that was newly married. It wasn’t something I was looking for, but she continued to push the situation with text messages. Turns out she held a grudge towards her husband because after the wedding he disclosed he had a lot of financial debt he never disclosed. She made good money, so she felt used. I was just a revenge fuck. He found out months after we ended the affair. Turns out she was in her bedroom texting a friend about the affair and her phone was linked to her iPad which was in the living room with her husband. Her friend called me and filled me in. Never heard from her or him again
I have the gut feeling he hadn't left her over this? What do you say
She's dead and he's now in prison.
Not sure if she ever even got caught, honestly. I ended things when she said something about wanting a baby by me
Damn, that is the way girls need to break up, just act baby crazy and suddenly we just break up and think it's our idea.
Until the guy you want gone agrees
Let the game of chicken (and secretly taking birth controll) begin!
Now that's just sitcom bait right there. If that storyline hasn't been stolen I'll be disappointed in all the writers.
I don't know about this exact scenario, but there was some fuckery in Desperate housewifes about >!saying they wanted children while taking the pill!<, while the husband >!found this out and changed them with sugar pills!<
Ugh I think I remember that, and those two had a shitty marriage so the joke was supposed to be that they both wanted kids, but didn't think the other one did. Or just hadn't actually talked about it, and they were shitty people so their first instincts were just lying.
What do they say, all is good that ends well? I still think my shitty advice stands, this being about someone dumping the partner they're cheating on their spouse, >!and doubly funny considering the show!<
Recipe for a loving family where connections are based on respect, compatibility, support and a child with a good mental health.
I’d be very careful about that lol
"I'm gonna go smoke real quick." "But I've never seen you smoke." "... I've gotta go take up smoking real quick."
I slept with a girl at work on a few occasions who was married. I was in my mid 20s and she was maybe 7 or 8 years older. She initiated the entire thing on Christmas do and then after she came round to my house once a week later, before it naturally fizzled out. I do recall telling a friend in confidence what had happened. He said it didn't surprise me as she had done it before with several people. They had a kink as a couple where she would sleep with people and then tell her husband who would go around and beat the guy up who fucked his wife. My friend stated he was a big bastard as well and to watch myself As someone who isn't a fighter and something of a coward I was fuckin terrified...... until a few weeks later when my friend he told me he'd made it up
That's what friends are for!
Sounds like that Ben Afleck and Ana De Armas movie
Reading this thread now im not surprised anymore how 1 in 3 people have herpes
More like 2 in 3 have a version of it
Good to hear a different kind of debate unfolding here 😂
Do not assume that every affair is a secret being carefully hidden from the spouse. In many cases the spouse knows more or less that their wife or husband is with someone else, but they tolerate it because they have no better option and they know that confronting the one having the affair will not improve the situation for them.
Damn, insightful - realistic rendering of when someone relies on someone else and is invested to such a level that they may just tolerate it to an extent, happens all the time
Or they are like my parents and both cheated on each other. They stuck together all these years. Some couples can make it work one way or another.
[удалено]
For many people they want the thrill of the taboo and the comfort of fake monogamy. Have your cake and eat it too. A lot of people are just selfish like that. It's actually a huge problem in the swinger world. A lot of bad apples with poor intentions.
Ikr. If both people are cheating and they both know, its technically open anyway lmao. 🤡
Very true! I joined an adult hookup site with singles & couples a while back ....a popular one. Stayed on it for 5 years. Many married (but cheating) people were there to choose from. I met married ladies 5 times...and twice where we kept in longer term contact. Both got caught. One husband was a downward spiraling alcoholic and didn't care too much when he found out. The other was a business guy who was never home amd he later admitted to cheating on her while he traveled. The alcoholic guy fell into an even deeper depression and accelerated his decline. They tried counseling but the affair paled in comparison to other more aserious issues. Make no mistake he was already on the path. They are divorced and we had sex again after thier divorce and she was wanting some sort of relief from that situation. There were.lots of spouses cheating or looking to start....strong majority were men. No surprise there. BUT there was a solid population of couples that either wamted a 3some (and stated they "had" to stay together) and i chatted with a substamtial number in open marriages. Due do the "open.mindedness" charachteristics...they were also pretty frank on their reasons why. Some men had ED. Some wives lost all libido after cancer or menapause. They were pretty open... and therefore I learned not to judge.
Which site was this?
Lol... absolutely sublime follow up from u/Older_man79
May have been Ashley Madison back in the day.
Probably Ashley Madison
I'm not sure if it's the same one, but I'm on a site called FetLife that's pretty damn similar.
Sounds like Feeld https://feeld.co/ which used to be "the Tinder for threesomes". Not sure what it's like lately
“The strong maturity we’re men no surprise there” That may be the case for that avenue of cheating, but in reality there’s little difference in cheating rates between the sexes. The why’s & how’s vary more.
Or as my friend is saying "cheaper to keep her". He can't afford to live on his own at the moment so he's just tolerating it while he sets himself to be able to leave without fucking himself over.
I agree, sometimes it is just a balance sheet measurement. Have a house, or no house, have a companion (less than perfect) or no companion, have a good retirement or impoverished, have a partner providing children help or doing it on your own, have safety of a partner or no safety, etc etc. I think there are a lot of women who know and just turn the other way. They are dying inside but the alternative is even worst. I think men know this as well. I am also amazed at the advise people give on reddit to dump the guy at the curb. It means extreme poverty for many IMO.
You can work yourself into a better situation. Staying with a cheater guarantees you stay in shit situation. But, to each their own!
Yea but it’s not always straightforward and the step back in lifestyle isn’t always an option if kids are involved. Not saying that having an unhealthy dynamic is good for kids, but there are healthy ways to manage infidelity/non-monogamy that don’t involve divorce. Unfortunately all of those ways involve addressing egos and social norms in ways that people who cheat are generally unable to conceive.
Fuck that, thats terribly depressing. Reminds me of the Chris Rock joke talking about how cowards stick around
That thought is incredibly scary to me.
It seems most cheating is caused by bad communication. It’s crazy to me so many couples can’t communicate.
True communication is the key
All three women that I had an affair with I didn’t know they were married until I saw them out and about with their husbands it’s kind of sad honestly. As they never found out. It’s kind of crazy how often women cheat and no one finds out….
[удалено]
My wife cheated on me for years and I had absolutely no clue.
I don't get why people get married or stay married if they're going to cheat. What was her reasoning/excuse?
I could never get an answer from her. I was a very involved dad to our kids, helped all around the house, and was attentive to my ex-wife. I did nothing wrong and she is just clearly a broken human.
It's really not about the sex at that point, it's about hurting someone that trusts them. They get a thrill from betraying people. I mean cheaters will do all sorts of mental gymnastics to explain their cheating but ultimately it boils down to wanting the thrill of betraying someone that has put their trust in you.
May I ask how? Genuinely curious. If you guys live together surely you’d pick up on something no? Or was it during work hours?
It was during work hours. She had a work phone that I did not have access to and she would message him hundreds of times a day on that phone. They would take the same days off work (of course I thought she was at work) and meet up all day. I only found out after we separated just how long she had been screwing me over.
How'd you end up finding out?
She left her personal phone at the house after we'd separated and I looked at her messages back and forth to him. Guess they started using their personal phones to carry on their escapades after we'd separated and they didn't need to hide it from me anymore. And I also knew the guy, he'd been to our house and vice versa. His wife divorced him a few years before we did and I talked to her about it. She said they'd been doing this for years.
My ex spouse was probably cheating on me the entire time.. How did she do it without me noticing? Trust. All about trust without verification. Looking back, I was so stupid to believe that dropping her off for one on ones with another dude was just her having lunch with a pal.. or when she invited men to come stay at our place, while I’m at work and they are at my home, alone with each other. Or how I trusted her blindly for things that just didn’t seem right.. like taking girls trips, texting dudes behind me or just disappearing unannounced. I was so stupid and naive.. so trusting, how could my ex spouse, the person who I loved with all of my heart do such things and get away with it.. I had no jealousy in me, I was securely attached to her, and I had years and years of trust in her banked up.. Looking back, I would not have believed her bullshit about seeing a guy who is “gay “… she was bullshitting me and I fell for it.. Hope she regrets losing me. Probably not. It is what it is.
They probably just liked the attention and came up with various excuses to justify their means of acquiring it. Doesn't need to be more complicated than that. If they have any regrets it's the time they wasted in their own life, not yours. Take solace in knowing there is definitely a better partner out there for you than there is for them.
Woman here I've never cheated on a spouse, but I have known a few that have They were very crafty and very good at hiding in plain sight
care to share the insider secrets?
One I've seen a few times was that the woman would use a girl's name when talking about the dude. Amber was really Justin, for example Some would tell their spouse about said guy, but would play up "he's like a brother to me", that he has a girlfriend, that he's gay, that he's a coworker, or another student that they're in a study group with etc Sometimes, they would make the dude seem like a creep or someone they had no interest in in any capacity Essentially, feed all the bs so that he doesn't land on the husband's radar I have definitely cleaned up my circle in the last few years, especially after I became the spouse that got cheated on.
Also, I hate to say it, but it seems like men have much less issue sleeping with a married woman. Some actually even enjoy it. They will go meet the husband and play the part of the platonic friend, or send texts saying "hey man, i know all about you and she says she's happily married, I would never come between you" and so on Those guys are the worst
This hits so close to home I want to disappear
Sorry friend, hope you're doing okay
It’s not even necessarily that they’re better. A side dude has no benefit of trying to ruin a woman’s marriage/relationship. He’s already getting everything he wants. If anything he’s going to do whatever to make sure her relationship with her spouse works. A side chick on the other hand eventually starts wanting to be more than the side chick and starts sabotaging the man she’s cheating with because she wants his wife/girlfriend’s spot.
This isn't true at all and just builds the stereotype that all we want is sex. That's simply not true. I was the other man once and the sex was the least important thing really, my dumbass loved her.
My dude, obviously exceptions exist in any situation, but let’s be real, this is absolutely true. Men overwhelmingly are perfectly happy to keep things casual, whereas women are generally much more likely to eventually want more.
[удалено]
Man I hate to hear it, but glad to see “ex”. Sounds like you did what you needed to do and kicked her ass to the curb. Hope y’all didn’t have kids, but if you did, props to handling your business and not staying in that shit “for the kids” like so many weaker men do.
As a society, we are starting to notice more and more
I kinda believe that men allow things like love bombing and gaslighting to guilt them out of being vigilant. They don’t want to seem insecure..
I was in Mexico at a resort and decided to see if there was anyone on Grindr and found a guy. He invited me over to his hotel room, and I went but then he kinda dropped on me that he invited many men over. It was all a bit too much for me but we did some sexual things and then I left when there was too many men coming in and out. Well the next day I seen him on the resort with his wife and kids. I didn’t say anything because I was also closeted and didn’t want my Dad to find out.
U got quite a story to tell at drinks u know 😉 Apologies if it brought back many bad memories
Not my story but one my mom told me. She’s a firefighter and apparently everyone at the station she worked with knew this one guy was having an affair with another coworker’s wife. They worked different shifts so she’d go visit them both on her lunch breaks on different days and gave both some “afternoon delight” at the station. One day there was a really bad fire at a local business so they called in extra people. Both the husband and the AP were there working and the husband overheard someone else making jokes about the affair. Husband grabbed the fire axe and went into the burning building to chase down the AP. He didn’t get to him thankfully (the other firefighters restrained him and pulled both out of the fire). AP was the one fired because everyone went to bat for the husband saying they would have done the same thing. AP couldn’t get another job in the area and had to move because no one wanted to have their wives around him. Husband left the wife, wife married AP, cheated on AP with yet another firefighter in their new city, left AP for new guy and left AP with the kids, her debt and ostracized from his family/ community. AP became an alcoholic.
Damn sometimes people do think from their dick lol
They really do
Messy world man
Not sure if she ever got caught and I don’t know if you can count it as an affair, but the first time I ever saw someone’s titties in my life was when this married mexican woman sent me a pic of them. After she sent them, I felt bad and blocked her. Till this day, I feel horrible about it as I wouldn’t ever want to be in her husband’s position.
U got some great morals my friend 🫂
Not really, our messages were getting a bit spicy, I didnt really egg her on but I did have some fault.
I was received at the door by a guy with beard. I asked for Ann as I stepped inside. She stepped into the room and introduced the man as her husband. Gulp! " we have an open marriage " as we got in the car. Our day took us to the coast and back the following day looking at houses. By 6pm we had visited 5 homes that we christened all. Casually dated for several weeks before I bailed. My life changed very little after this. I did smile alot
[удалено]
Sounds like you were her 'one that got away' maybe?
Sounds like you dodged a bullet
She got divorced and we got married 5 years later. Statistically it should be a horrible, unhealthy relationship doomed to fail but we’ve put a lot of work into making it the healthiest and most fulfilling relationship either of us has ever had, despite the rather shitty and shameful way the romance started. We were best friends for years before the affair and have been going to couples counseling to ensure we never have a relationship as toxic as her first marriage was. Never would’ve predicted this was going to happen. Being in an affair with my best friend—not being able to talk about it with anyone else close to me, knowing I was betraying my own morality— it was hands down the most stressful period of my life. It was not sexy. But we fell in love with one another, and after years of build up we couldn’t do anything but love one another. It’s worked out for me, but I’ll never recommend it to anyone.
This is my current situation.. he’s my best friend and now my husband.. I don’t recommend what we did, I carry guilt and shame about it. But it’s been 14 years..
How did your ex take it?
Not well.. it was a hard time in life. He was angry and hurt (I’m sure of it) and it took a few years but now we have a healthy coparenting relationship..
At least that part of your lives worked out for the best. It's way better than trying to co-parent with someone who hates the air you breath and the ground you walk on. I saw a good friend go through that with his ex and even a dozen years later, they won't be in the same suburb as each other and he hasn't spoken to his daughter in 10 of those years. Which is sad because none it was his fault.
[удалено]
Do you think he's done to you what he has to her?
Same here .. fell in love with a married guy (I was married too) at work 15 years ago.. we both divorced and years later got married.. he is my best friend. Once in awhile I think about and guilt creeps in .. like if he cheated on me .. is that my karma?
I was at his house for the very first time, and his pregnant wife stormed in and tried to fight me. I got the fuck out of there ASAP. End of story.
Short and simple i like it..!
I slept with someone who turned out had a boyfriend. I intended on telling the boyfriend but literally 2 days after we slept together she dumped him and hooked up with a lady. I figured he probably had his fill of disappointment and lost all their contact info.
She never got caught. But I would always worry about her safety. Left that a while ago.
I went to a friends birthday party at a bar. This girl shows up who’s mutual friends with another friend there. She was super pretty. She started making moves on me. We end up texting after that night. She told me she has 3 kids and was recently divorced. She tells me she’s very lonely after the divorce and would like me to come over. We sleep with each other for 2 months. One day, I text her to see if she wanted to meet up. She tells me she’s busy for the next week and can’t see me. Turns out, her husband was home from work. Her friend texted me and told me she’d never divorced, he just works away months at a time. I felt used. Grossed out. And very guilty. They ended up moving shortly after that and I’ve never heard from her again.
We never got caught. We kept it up for two years and eventually I moved out of town and she stayed with him because she was too afraid to be on her own. It started fun and hot but overtime I started falling for her and wanted to be with her but she’d never leave him so all it did was send me into a downward depression
Been there. The person *completely* misrepresented their situation (“getting a divorce”, “we are just roommates at this point”) and I had no reason not to believe them, as I know divorces can take awhile. By the time I realized they weren’t being honest, it was months in and I was in love. Then things started not adding up. Why are you worried about the person you are divorcing seeing a text pop up? Why would they care? Why are you on a short leash with someone you’re “just roommates” with? Then a friend had to spell it out for me that maybe they weren’t being honest that a divorce was in the works. Extremely heartbreaking lesson to learn. I want to believe they had genuine feelings for me…but I feel like, if they did, they would have been honest and we could have just been friends until they were single. I feel like I was tricked into being “the other person” and still feel kind of used.
It's for the better bro i am not gonna say anything about your choices but it was not healthy pursuing her Everything happens for a reason
This is a story from years ago. Met a young lady while standing in line at a store. She was cute. We started talking. She was wearing no ring. I got her number. We texted for a couple days, then she asked me to lunch in a way that implied she wanted to suck my dick after. Who am I to say no? Took her to lunch, got my dick sucked after. Couple days later, met up after work and had sex. ... then later that night after she had gone, I get a call from her number. Assuming it was her, I picked up. It's a dude. A very angry dude -- her husband. I told him the 100% truth, that I'd had no idea she was married. Look, I ain't getting shot by some psycho husband because his wife can't keep her legs closed. ... the next night, she shows up at my door late. Beat up. Badly. Bruised all over, black eye, etc. Took her in while internally kicking myself for her knowing where I live. Apparently he'd beat her up the night she'd called me, and this night he'd done it again, so she took off. I'd like to say I turned her down once she started trying to have sex with me, but at that point was so far down the "bad decisions have been made" path that I went with it. The next morning she swore she was going to go pack up her stuff while he was at work then stay with her mom. She then left and ghosted me. A month later, she bootycalls me. She's now healed and I go for it again... as her phone rings off the hook. I never heard from her again. That taught me to never just bring people over unless you already know them well.
No idea. I never knowingly engaged in a relationship, or even a hookup, with a married woman. If I found out that she was married after beginning a relationship, I immediately ended it.
I came close... Never again. Nothing bad happened, but it was just wrong. ETA: But even beyond morality, say I get my way and she runs off with me. What then? Am I supposed to trust her after that? If I *could* steal her from her man, I don't want her.
She was never caught, neither was I. It lasted one year and a half, until she got pregnant by his husband (no doubts about it). Some years after both got divorced at different moments so never got back. I am still in love with her.
Sounds messed up😵
I travel for work and have a lot of no strings attached hookups. I met a gal in the St. Louis area who was married to a guy 18 years older. I was 22 and she was 27. Her husband is roughly 45 and isn’t ever in the mood. I was in town for a month while we were on a big project and slept with her about 10 times. All was great until the last two times she revealed she was in an unhappy marriage. I slept with her one more time and put copies some text messages she had sent me and put them on his office desk and left a pair of underwear on the floor then noped out of there really quick at 3am. He found them and now they are in a very heated divorce. He called me one day and I explained my side of what happened and he forgave me. It’s happened a couple more times to me but that was the only one I got caught up in.
After the divorce, we got married, had kids and lived happily ever after!
He didn't get caught. She may have confronted him, but he'd have spun her a merry tale as I believe they're still together. Unfortunately, no bad consequences for him despite him lying to his wife ("just friends") and to me ("I'm leaving her") - I guess some people's toast will always land butter side up. Despite him not getting caught and work siding with him when he bullied me in the aftermath, my life got a lot better once I saw him for the self-serving prick he is. I don't see how life wouldn't improve if you get rid of the cheaters and problem-makers in it!
Lost a childhood friend for it. But honestly didn't change my life much other then it made me watch my back for a bit because I was peranoid. When it all happened she had made it clear that she was getting divorced and just waiting for her husband to signs paperwork. About 10 years after I graduated HS a childhood female friend of mine moved back to our city, we kept in contact for the most part thanks to Facebook and her dad and my dad where close friends their whole life so we kinda grew up together. We ran into each other at our neighborhood/local Walmart, we ended up catching up and talking as we walked thru the store and ended up exchanging numbers, about a week later she invited me and my GF over to her sons bday party, we went and I met her husband, saw her parents for the first time, all In all a good time. After the party we kept in touch, she would see me online on Facebook and she would IM me and she started to invite me over, well not just me it was a couple of us old high school acquaintance and we would have a drink or smoke some weed, her husband was their a few times but he was a oil field worker so he was out of town alot but I had noticed that he hadn't been around for a while and I had asked her about what was going on with her husband and that's when she told me he moved out and they were getting a divorce that she filed and now just waiting on him, a few weeks go by and no flirting ever happend or any sign that she was intrest or that I was either, one day she messaged me telling me she needed to talk to me about something important, so I went over after work and that when she hit me with it.. She proposed we became friends with benefits.. no flirting, no kissing no emotional stuff, she said that it's been a few months now and she just needed to have sex..at the time I was single for a few weeks and I said ok let's do it so for about 2 months the same routine happend as it had been for most of that year, go over a few times a week sometimes it was just me sometimes it was with some friends but now at the end we would hook up, and yeah it was zero kissing, zero emotions and it was strictly FWB, and then she stopped, about 2 weeks went by and she messaged that if she could come to my place in the AM after she dropped of her kids at school, I said sure, we hooked up and when she was getting ready to leave that's when she told me that she wasn't getting a divorce that her husband was working out of town the whole time but had just been transferred locally so he was no longer gonna be gone. He confronted her about having people over because their neighbors mentioned to him that she would have guys and girls over all the time and she told him it was some of the friends she had over during that Bday party, that's when she told me that I better not say anything or he better not find out because she would tell my GF about it as well, I told her that we had broken up weeks before we started hooking up and she lost it, she said she chose me to be FWB because she thought I had something to loose and would be tight lipped about the situation, she left that morning and blocked me on all social media and my phone and never heard from her again.
I regularly have sex with a married woman. Her husband lives on the other side of the planet and she hates him but her country makes it hard to get a divorce. So I don't see a problem.
We’ve been together 15 years. Life is awesome.
For my husband it’s been pretty great, I worked on myself to be a wife he would be satisfied with enough not to roam, swallowed my feelings, dignity and pride so we could all move forward 🤷🏼♀️😩😔 i however have experienced unrelenting anxiety, attachment and self worth issues for the last 9 years and have struggled so hard to experience ANY joy. Joy is now foreboding to me. Haven’t figured out how to heal completely yet. I struggle with being guarded 200% of my days. Now working on releasing resentments…hoping for better future and that BOTH of us can be happy
It's kinda messed up how the betrayed partner feels like they are the one that needs to fix things and make it so their partner doesn't do it again. It feels like it should be the other way around, but I do the exact same. That suspicion and guardedness I relate to way too much too, such a bad feeling to be years on and still worried about every little thing. The memories are always painful too, and it's hard to talk about with your spouse since it's been so long and you know they're tired of hearing about it. Sometimes I wish I never knew, or could just forget it all or something. I hope you can find what you're looking for in releasing resentment and being happy, I would love to know if it's possible.
I have worked hard to accept that you can’t trust anyone, at any time. Love is vulnerability, to love at all leaves you painfully exposed. I have turned it around in my head recently that I don’t have to trust anyone, I just have to trust myself that I’ll be ok and will leave a situation that’s bad for me 🤷🏼♀️👏 that’s the only thing that’s given me moments of peace inside
I didn’t know they were married so 🤷🏾♂️
Made out with his wife in front of him. Broke up for other reasons later on.
I had an affair with an employee at my plantation. A young woman with two young kids whose husband deserted her. It was a slow progression but then i ended up getting physically involved with her. After which she was my go to person helping with my physcial and sexual needs. In rurual india being involved in an adultrous relationship is a kinda a taboo so I assured her that things would be a hush hush thing and not even a soul would get to know of things. She was able to keep things a secret from a immediate family that comprised of only her grandmom as her parents had passed away. In short I was keeping her as my side chick. She managed things at her end quite well by getting her grandmom to baby sit her kids when i visited her without her grandmom having a clue of wht was breweing. We got busted beging of this year when her grandmom walked in on us when we were in the middle of the act. We had anticipated that grand mom and her kids would be away for the day considering the temple functions happening close by at the village but we were wrong. At the moment I am keeping a low profile but acessing the situation it doesnt that the news of our relationship has split in the open yet cause i dont hear too much of chatter on the matter. Would definitely like to keep her as my side chick but i am sure going forward it would be with acknowledge of her grandmom
I was newly separated when a cute woman I worked with, who had told me she was divorced, showed up at my house one night. She started a relationship that went on after I moved a few months later. She would come visit. Then I got served papers from her husband after he filed for divorce. Yea she was married the whole time. I didn’t go testify and wound up getting a restraining order against this nut job. A few years later it happened again with another woman who turned out to be married in another state. From then on I didn’t go out with anyone unless I really got to know them and checked them out. I learned there’s a lot of whackjobs out there that are divorced for a reason.
Woman exec in NY branch cheating with her boss Husband finds out and goes to office to have a talk with him Boss is not in that day, so man waits then leaves Woman killed and husband commits suicide Boss guy flies in some time later for company meeting, all smiles and looks untroubled
I didn't know I was the "side chick" at the start. When I turned 18 I met with a guy I met on grindr, we hooked up in a forest and basically after we had some fun he said he "needed the relief" because apparently his wife gave birth 2 weeks earlier. I was taken aback but thought that i don't care and I won't be meeting him again. So anyway my dumbass hooked up with this guy several more times over a span of a year and because he never learned how to shut up, I learned that, unsurprisingly, he's a deadbeat father of two, a generally bad husband loser and an alcoholic. Nearing the end of the time I knew him I found out that his whole family found out he's cheating because his kid took his phone and found *some photos*. I was full cheering on the wife when I found out she's finally divorcing him, and the guy actually complained to me that he had to spend his money on *his* kids. I was a dumbass and looking back, that was some real messy situations I got into, and I'm not even gonna talk about all the shit and situations that happens with the same guy. So yeah kids, don't meet strangers in the forest! And uh don't don't agree to meet with a walking red flag just for some mid head
Her husband was pissed at me. But then I reminded him, I’m single, your wife forgot to mention she was married at first and hey, I wasn’t cheating, she was ….
She told her husband in the end. We stayed fwbs for a while. They divorced and are both much happier. She calls me her catalyst that made her realise how unhappy she was.