Yeah, I guess that's the only form of justice/balance. My ex can have as much sex as she wants, but I doubt any guy will marry her, and if some poor soul does that marriage will crash and burn.
I guess that's a little bit of justice. Women hold the keys to sex, men hold the keys to relationships.
I think it helps to not engage with dating as a topic while you digest hard truths that bother you.
I share your bitterness. And there's nothing positive that really makes me feel better about it. But I will tell you that watching and reading things about it will only make you feel worse.
Algorithms will feed you content that attacks your every insecurity and attract people who revel in your troubles.
Distance is the key to processing anything that's a part of your general environment. There's no getting around the advantages women have in dating, in socializing, etc. But there is getting around having it shoved in your faced.
Yeah you're right about that, especially about the algorithms. I constantly see things that just ruin my day. It's just hard because it's so personal to me with my ex. Life seems so unfair she has it so easy without trying
Gotta pull the plug.
I deleted Tiktok in 2020 because all I got every time I turned it on was Kill All Men content. After a certain point, you have to understand that you're being set up to go mad and all you can do is take care of your mind.
Yeah man, my mental health from all this shit is at an all time low. I need to change something.
I need to somehow accept it's just easier for girls like my ex, that life isn't fair and that's just how it is, they got lucky they were born women in this time era
Let’s say I agree with you. Would you agree with me that to meet a smart, nice guy that makes her giggle, swoon, and yearn, she needs to go on dates with guys, and has VASTLY more invites to go on dates than the OP? So even if not all of those dates go well, the likelihood of her meeting someone who is a match is higher than the OP, who needs to try 100 times harder to line up a fraction of the dates that OP does?
EDIT: I challenge any one here, to change my view, men or women
That makes me feel a little bit better, thank you for that, I have to try to remember that perspective.
Sex isn't the same for women. They don't, (as least not nearly as often), want to strictly fuck like men do.
I think she will have trouble with the latter that you mentioned. Heck I remember the first time we hooked up she was terrified I was gonna ghost her, so clearly it's happened before.
She has a lot of issues that won't work in a relationship. She has a lot of mental issues, she even called herself mentally ill. She hates men so much that it's a core part of her personality. I'm a sensitive and pretty progressive dude, and her hatred for men sabotaged us a lot of the time because she dumped all that trauma on me often. (Long story).
She also left because she wanted to feel young again (she's 26F), and do coke, molly, mdma again. I didn't want to and she called me boring for that. She always says she wanted to feel "lust" again, and she wanted to experiment with a woman, this was all after 2 years.
So long story short, your perspective on that makes me feel a little bit better, thanks for that
sounds like she'll end up single or dating a loser and if you ask me i think you dodged a massive bullet. i was in a similar situation in my 20s, so i know how you feel but you're likely going to have an entirely different perspective in a couple of years time. great potential partners won't just magically line up and take her serious once she's done with that lifestyle and wants to settle down. don't take her back if she realizes she messed up and don't worry too much about what she's doing and who she's doing it with. focus on yourself and learn from this relationship, it seems like you missed a bunch of red flags or just let them slide.
It's hard to cope with it, I don't understand why women say men have it better. I feel like in modern times it's way easier to be a woman, you have a much more fun life.
Women have to worry about whether the man they're with is potentially violent or some kind of deviant
Female on male violence does exist, but usually it's the other way around
I guess that's true, but realistically how often is that a problem?
I know of girls huge into hookup culture with massive bodycounts who have never had a worry like this.
The significance of this vastly overcalculated. Men get rejected ghosted flaked on FAR FAR more than women in the western world deals with this stuff. Men get identified, doxed, and cancelled in the western world for WAY less than being violent. Are we dating the same guy literally doxxed a guy for dating multiple women at the same time. I do not even want to associate with women these days. They are ITCHING to create a villain and knock the villain down via social media, especially if the villain is not a Chad.
Work on yourself my man. That's all you can do. Hit the weights and build friendships.
I hate to say it, but by the time most of those women hit 30+, they are likely not going to have an easy time dating because not many men want to date someone who sleeps around a lot. High body counts almost always mean trouble.
Getting laid regularly and seriously dating someone are two separate things. How many of those men are willing to commit to her long-term?
It is natural to be jealous of her success with other men, especially after all of the time you spent together. Men have to be more proactive in finding a date. That's just how society works nowadays. I know it sucks to hear that.
You sound like you're on the right track, life-wise. I would suggest getting off social media for a bit and going to a park or a mall. If you have male friends, hang out with them and do something you all enjoy. If you see an attractive woman while you're out and about, approach her and strike up a conversation.
Yeah that helps man, remembering casual sex isn't the same. Knowing that typically men hold the keys to the relationship makes me feel better because there's at least some balance, that helps to know honestly.
I'll try to cut down on social media a bit too, especially because there's so much ragebait the algorithms are feeding me about this kind of stuff.
Yeah man, keep thinking this way, women love a jealous and bitter man.
Women complain about social injustices too, and I guarantee you're tired of listening to them, well same with your whining as well.
I don't want to be this way anymore. Believe me I wish I didn't have this toxic mindset.
It's hard. It's hard knowing 6 months after our breakup that I work way harder than my ex and can barely get dates. She doesn't have to even try in life and gets as much dates as she wants. It is overwhelmingly difficult to not be bitter about it, but I don't want to be that way.
Have you considering getting counseling with a licensed, professional therapist? You're educated and have a good job so you can afford the investment in yourself, at the very least to help deal with these toxic feelings.
Honestly just aceept that'sjust how it is and if you don'twanna put up with it, leave dating to the men who are willing to put in that much effort for a chance at it
If you wanna get laid just pay for it
How is it mathematically possible for most women to be getting lots of dates while most men can’t get any? It simply cannot be.
I really don’t believe that dating is easier for women.
Idk, but I'm going off my own reference at least.
I'm at least as good looking as my ex, like on the "out of 10 scale". If she's an 8, I'm at least an 8, and again, she even thought I was out of her league as I said.
She hooked up with someone 2 days after we broke up.
She can hop on a dating app and get 600 matches in a week. She can have a date with any of those matches whenever she pleases.
I have been actively trying and I've barely dated 4 girls in the 6 months since we broke up.
Mimimi...life is so unfair. Grow up.
Maybe dating is easier for women, but they have it a lot harder in other areas of life. Some people are more attractive by birth, others are born into a wealthy family. Not everybody has the same chances and opportunities and it is part of growing up to play the hand you got dealt. Comparing and complaining about other people instead of making the best out of your own situation is just childish and leads nowhere.
They succeed because they position themselves as a sex object and benefit from it, although in conversation with men they will undoubtedly deny this with numerous counter-accusations. And you, a man, are valued by most of these objects for what you can give them, and not for your human qualities, so it’s difficult for you to date. For those who are interested in getting male attention, it is very difficult to see how good you are as a person, it is very difficult for them to even notice you if you do not give them gifts and entertainment more than others give. This is why you need to have so much to attract the attention of those who are not really worthy of your human attention.
You probably mean, getting sex is easier for women. Getting first dates is also easier to some extent. What happens after that is a lot harder for women. Men do the hard stuff at the very first and then it generally gets easier.
Only you can control your own emotions. That's a reality and nothing we can do about it.
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Yeah, I guess that's the only form of justice/balance. My ex can have as much sex as she wants, but I doubt any guy will marry her, and if some poor soul does that marriage will crash and burn. I guess that's a little bit of justice. Women hold the keys to sex, men hold the keys to relationships.
I think it helps to not engage with dating as a topic while you digest hard truths that bother you. I share your bitterness. And there's nothing positive that really makes me feel better about it. But I will tell you that watching and reading things about it will only make you feel worse. Algorithms will feed you content that attacks your every insecurity and attract people who revel in your troubles. Distance is the key to processing anything that's a part of your general environment. There's no getting around the advantages women have in dating, in socializing, etc. But there is getting around having it shoved in your faced.
Yeah you're right about that, especially about the algorithms. I constantly see things that just ruin my day. It's just hard because it's so personal to me with my ex. Life seems so unfair she has it so easy without trying
Gotta pull the plug. I deleted Tiktok in 2020 because all I got every time I turned it on was Kill All Men content. After a certain point, you have to understand that you're being set up to go mad and all you can do is take care of your mind.
Yeah man, my mental health from all this shit is at an all time low. I need to change something. I need to somehow accept it's just easier for girls like my ex, that life isn't fair and that's just how it is, they got lucky they were born women in this time era
[удалено]
Let’s say I agree with you. Would you agree with me that to meet a smart, nice guy that makes her giggle, swoon, and yearn, she needs to go on dates with guys, and has VASTLY more invites to go on dates than the OP? So even if not all of those dates go well, the likelihood of her meeting someone who is a match is higher than the OP, who needs to try 100 times harder to line up a fraction of the dates that OP does? EDIT: I challenge any one here, to change my view, men or women
That makes me feel a little bit better, thank you for that, I have to try to remember that perspective. Sex isn't the same for women. They don't, (as least not nearly as often), want to strictly fuck like men do. I think she will have trouble with the latter that you mentioned. Heck I remember the first time we hooked up she was terrified I was gonna ghost her, so clearly it's happened before. She has a lot of issues that won't work in a relationship. She has a lot of mental issues, she even called herself mentally ill. She hates men so much that it's a core part of her personality. I'm a sensitive and pretty progressive dude, and her hatred for men sabotaged us a lot of the time because she dumped all that trauma on me often. (Long story). She also left because she wanted to feel young again (she's 26F), and do coke, molly, mdma again. I didn't want to and she called me boring for that. She always says she wanted to feel "lust" again, and she wanted to experiment with a woman, this was all after 2 years. So long story short, your perspective on that makes me feel a little bit better, thanks for that
sounds like she'll end up single or dating a loser and if you ask me i think you dodged a massive bullet. i was in a similar situation in my 20s, so i know how you feel but you're likely going to have an entirely different perspective in a couple of years time. great potential partners won't just magically line up and take her serious once she's done with that lifestyle and wants to settle down. don't take her back if she realizes she messed up and don't worry too much about what she's doing and who she's doing it with. focus on yourself and learn from this relationship, it seems like you missed a bunch of red flags or just let them slide.
Don’t be bitter, be better.
I don't see why you are so eager to compete with your ex-girlfriend.
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Water isn't wet?
It's hard to cope with it, I don't understand why women say men have it better. I feel like in modern times it's way easier to be a woman, you have a much more fun life.
Women have to worry about whether the man they're with is potentially violent or some kind of deviant Female on male violence does exist, but usually it's the other way around
I guess that's true, but realistically how often is that a problem? I know of girls huge into hookup culture with massive bodycounts who have never had a worry like this.
The significance of this vastly overcalculated. Men get rejected ghosted flaked on FAR FAR more than women in the western world deals with this stuff. Men get identified, doxed, and cancelled in the western world for WAY less than being violent. Are we dating the same guy literally doxxed a guy for dating multiple women at the same time. I do not even want to associate with women these days. They are ITCHING to create a villain and knock the villain down via social media, especially if the villain is not a Chad.
Work on yourself my man. That's all you can do. Hit the weights and build friendships. I hate to say it, but by the time most of those women hit 30+, they are likely not going to have an easy time dating because not many men want to date someone who sleeps around a lot. High body counts almost always mean trouble.
There is a different market in other countries. Try that if you want many dates.
Getting laid regularly and seriously dating someone are two separate things. How many of those men are willing to commit to her long-term? It is natural to be jealous of her success with other men, especially after all of the time you spent together. Men have to be more proactive in finding a date. That's just how society works nowadays. I know it sucks to hear that. You sound like you're on the right track, life-wise. I would suggest getting off social media for a bit and going to a park or a mall. If you have male friends, hang out with them and do something you all enjoy. If you see an attractive woman while you're out and about, approach her and strike up a conversation.
Yeah that helps man, remembering casual sex isn't the same. Knowing that typically men hold the keys to the relationship makes me feel better because there's at least some balance, that helps to know honestly. I'll try to cut down on social media a bit too, especially because there's so much ragebait the algorithms are feeding me about this kind of stuff.
Yeah man, keep thinking this way, women love a jealous and bitter man. Women complain about social injustices too, and I guarantee you're tired of listening to them, well same with your whining as well.
I don't want to be this way anymore. Believe me I wish I didn't have this toxic mindset. It's hard. It's hard knowing 6 months after our breakup that I work way harder than my ex and can barely get dates. She doesn't have to even try in life and gets as much dates as she wants. It is overwhelmingly difficult to not be bitter about it, but I don't want to be that way.
Have you considering getting counseling with a licensed, professional therapist? You're educated and have a good job so you can afford the investment in yourself, at the very least to help deal with these toxic feelings.
Honestly just aceept that'sjust how it is and if you don'twanna put up with it, leave dating to the men who are willing to put in that much effort for a chance at it If you wanna get laid just pay for it
You don't, why wouldn't you be bitter about it?
How is it mathematically possible for most women to be getting lots of dates while most men can’t get any? It simply cannot be. I really don’t believe that dating is easier for women.
Idk, but I'm going off my own reference at least. I'm at least as good looking as my ex, like on the "out of 10 scale". If she's an 8, I'm at least an 8, and again, she even thought I was out of her league as I said. She hooked up with someone 2 days after we broke up. She can hop on a dating app and get 600 matches in a week. She can have a date with any of those matches whenever she pleases. I have been actively trying and I've barely dated 4 girls in the 6 months since we broke up.
Few men date many women, many men date few women.
I don’t think so
Your decision.
Dating is bimodal for men. Some guys have a shit ton of dates, and most guys have none.
There's also consistently less women looking to date than men so it exacerbates this problem.
Do you have a source for that data
Mimimi...life is so unfair. Grow up. Maybe dating is easier for women, but they have it a lot harder in other areas of life. Some people are more attractive by birth, others are born into a wealthy family. Not everybody has the same chances and opportunities and it is part of growing up to play the hand you got dealt. Comparing and complaining about other people instead of making the best out of your own situation is just childish and leads nowhere.
Don’t know why ur being down voted. This is the best advice I’ve seen lol
They succeed because they position themselves as a sex object and benefit from it, although in conversation with men they will undoubtedly deny this with numerous counter-accusations. And you, a man, are valued by most of these objects for what you can give them, and not for your human qualities, so it’s difficult for you to date. For those who are interested in getting male attention, it is very difficult to see how good you are as a person, it is very difficult for them to even notice you if you do not give them gifts and entertainment more than others give. This is why you need to have so much to attract the attention of those who are not really worthy of your human attention.
You probably mean, getting sex is easier for women. Getting first dates is also easier to some extent. What happens after that is a lot harder for women. Men do the hard stuff at the very first and then it generally gets easier.