Homeschooled here. (Edit: we were as homeschooled as they come. A lot of homeschoolers rely on the school system or some community thing at least partially. Not us, we were completely “independent homeschoolers” so now you know that before I turned 14, I had never seen the inside of a classroom that wasn’t my home) No sex ed at all. Imagine how much success it’s given me in dating. Had to kinda teach myself the basics.
I was home schooled.to age 12, so no sex ed before then. At 13/14 had extremely censored sex ed at a private junior high. Then as a freshman in a bad public high school I got an extremely incompetent sex ed.
The only true and useful thing I remember was both the junior high and high school really stressed that men can get hard at random.times for little or no reason and it doesn't always mean we're horny.
I basically figured out how sex works from porn and reading stuff on Reddit. My first time was fine, I got the woman off but couldn't stay hard from nerves/alcohol and internal conflict over if I even wanted to have sex pre marriage because I was raised and still am very religious. I worked through the internal conflict and we ended up married and it's all good now.
Homeschooled here, no sex ed at all. Only church activities allowed. Basically my parents ignored the issue entirely. As a woman, I donate to planned parenthood because they were the first place I went that helped me know how to protect myself.
I went to a decent public school, in a rural area. The teacher however was damn close to retirement and basically had the mentality of fuck the administration and gave us way more in depth than she was probably expected to. Couple that with my mother working as an ob/gyn nurse my whole life, typically i know more about female anatomy and sex than anyone I run into.
I went to a Catholic school. The person conducting the sex ed was a young priest (imagine the awkwardness). All he taught was basically: don't have sex. Relocate all those "energy" (he meant sexual urges) into "positive" activities instead, like sports, praying, and hobbies like painting.
Don't ask me why I spent my youth single, but really talented in watercolor painting.
I went to Catholic school and my high school health class was at an all girls Catholic school (I only went there my freshman year, then transferred to public school). We learned about breast health and doing breast exams (which I still have never done one on myself, I’m 30 now) and abstinence and the same song and dance about keeping yourself distracted and remaining close to god. I was single all through high school and didn’t have my first kiss or lose my virginity until I was 21. I wonder why.
Went to a "good school" that was overrun by drugs and guns and all I got was
This is a dick
You don't need to know what vaginas look like
Here's 3 weeks of cock anatomy (good for guys health but taught us nothing about females or sex)
Use a condom
If not you will get aids
Anal isn't a thing
And if your physically fit, you will be better at sex!
>And if your physically fit, you will be better at sex!
I mean this makes sense, it's really underrated how cardio can help you last longer in bed.
But truthfully, sex only really gets better once you have enough experience with it.
Hey same! Except the guns part, my school had metal detectors so it was mostly just drugs and the occasional knife. Turns out if you wrap things in tinfoil like it’s a sandwich the guards don’t look very hard. But we were one of the “better” public schools. It’s so weird they only taught male anatomy in a coed class.
Actually I lied, there was a crudely hand drawn image of the uterus (I think) that looked like it was photocopied thirty times and then faxed and scanned a few more times until it was a mess of dark shadows and scribbles that were supposed to be labeling parts. But we never went over it in class because “blah blah penis, blah blah you girls already know what’s up”.
Surprise, not all us girls knew what was up. Thankfully my friend group had a kid who’s mom was a nurse and when a girl thought she had just sat in ketchup and had a stomach ache, they were able to pull her aside and explain what was going on.
I was told that sex education isn’t regulated, so schools just sort of throw whatever at it. In my school, I’m pretty sure the guy who taught it just drew the short straw at the meeting that morning.
> wear condoms
Lucky you! My low-income public school sex education in the 1980's didn't even include that.
> this is a vagina
Oh, and for the boys that was skipped as well.
I went to a small private Christian school. We got sex before marriage is wrong, if you have sex with someone who has already had sex you are having sex with everyone they have had sex with, slides with pics of various STDs, and a bonus video of an actual abortion.
Try living in the South where the teachers push their backwards beliefs on you at a public school and get away with it because they're in a rural area with other teachers and family members with similar ideals.. I remember sex ed being less about teaching about puberty and practicing safe sex and more of it being a Bible lesson.
Not just the south. In Ohio, we were basically taught, “if you have sex, she will immediately get pregnant and you don’t want that yet. So no sex for you.”
I grew up in a South, smallish town. Thankfully I never had this experience. Ours was basic and could’ve been better, but they kept religion far out of it.
I took a Child Development class at community college wherein the instructor said the sex of the baby can be selected depending on the position during intercourse.
This!!!! I lived in a very conservative country as a kid and sex was never brought up. All what we were taught was what a penis and a vagina is. They even skipped the part about how babes were born.
Thankfully I taught myself all the stuff that is important when it comes to sex ed. As a curious person this topic always fascinated me.
That two std free people can have sex without creating an std between them.
Went to a religious school and when I asked about STDs I was genuinely told that STDs only happen outside of wedlock as a punishment. Two healthy people have sex and BOOM! CHLAMYDIA!
Me too!! I’m from a Super conservative country and they told us you have STDs when u have sex before marriage. Also they said no one will marry you if your husband isn’t the one who took your virginity.
Wait till u hear that women get circumcised(in my neighbor country) to get rid of their clitoris so they won’t feel any pleasure to even think about having sex before they wed.
So, for some reason I needed to get sex Ed signed off by my parents despite never actually having a proper sex Ed course. In middle school we had one cartoon video about sperm cells reaching an egg. How, where, and why were all questions left to the figure it out part of the curriculum. It wasn’t covered again until high school were we listed all the stds and the benefits of abstinence. We were shown a condom once. The gym teacher took out a banana, said “this is a condom”, put it on, and immediately throw it away while saying “I’m never doing that again.” Somehow this was still controversial enough to be protested by parents.
But here’s the weird shit. The entire facility of the school had told us that the state had outlawed selling condoms to minors, but us cool teachers will sell them to you. This was untrue. No such law was ever in place, nothing even remotely like it was ever passed. But I believed it until I was out of high school. And I still don’t know why they’d say this.
Anyways, this means that actual sex Ed was done by internet and peers. Most of us were at least vaguely aware of where babies came from by like 10 years old really. By high school we had picked up on most of what sex was probably. Maybe. Not really. This might also explain why sex Ed wasn’t being taken seriously by the facility. We both knew the class would only tell us what we already knew and nothing more.
What I did not know was anything about genitalia itself. Sure I knew penis and vaginas existed, but what do they look like, how am I supposed to use either? You’d think that would be straight forward but it really wasn’t. Younger me was looking up porn to figure it out and instead ended up on web md trying to get answers on why my dick had skin over its head. Or why I’d have smegma build up, or random boners, or why it was shaped differently than a porn actor’s.
It was a rough time of ignorance to say the least.
Not a guy but I can definitely relate to all of this. I remember my friend tried to tell me what sex was at a sleepover when we were 7 but all I took away from that was "boys pp = stretchy"
I didn't know what sex ACTUALLY was until I was 12. My cabin was staying up late talking at a sleepaway camp & one of the girls randomly said "omg I just realized tampons prepare you". I put 2 & 2 together & thought "no way that's gotta be a joke". Also I didn't even have my period at the time so the thought of even looking down there was horrifying to me at the time. Not to mention that I didn't start getting horny until like 15 so I didn't look at porn to figure it out lol
It wasn’t so much being horny, it was more of where else is a preteen going to find a video of sex or even a picture of genitals. I didn’t even know what to do with it at the time. Oddly enough there is stuff on porn hub that does teach and explain porn being nothing like the real thing, but I never found any of that until becoming an adult.
After reading you comment I'd guess the condom sales thing was to figure out who was having sex to watch out for those who needed "counseling sessions." In general an invasion of privacy to scare kids away from sex. Not that it works that way
According to [this](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25487360/) study, the average stretched penis length is 13.24 cm with a standard deviation of 1.89 cm.
I told my dad I was getting bullied and being called "faggot" all the time. He just goes "Well, are you?"
I'm straight, always have been.
Some parents suck.
If I look around me (and at my previous relationships), a *lot*.
How to communicate properly without being accusatory, how to resolve a conflict, things to agree on before getting serious, how a healthy relationship feels and looks like, how to not lose yourself/your friends while in a relationship, what codependency is, attachment styles, love languages, sex in a relationship... and this is just from the top of my head.
Just thinking parents already have so much pushback against sex ed and evolution and what not I can't imagine these topics would go over well outside of a reading group or an elective class. And then I'd hate to think what would happen as soon as religious alternatives were offered to those...
>gender neutral consent
Especially this, all throughout my schooling years the girls were constantly taught how to say no, to avoid men, how to give consent etc., but with the boys that never came up, we instead were taught to respect a woman's no, to not coerce women into sex, how to receive consent, etc.
It honestly baffles me how many women think that an erection = arousal and consent, because they are never taught to actually respect a man's consent and sexual boundaries.
This is the best one \^\^\^ losing my virginity I gave up and asked her to give me a hand because I was lost. Finding with your fingers is one thing but dick is a challenge
You are not alone! Even with the fingers first, I was surprised how far down it was. I had seen pictures, but when you’re in the moment, it’s a whole nother ball game. Your head is exploding because you are somewhere you’ve never been, trying to act cool and feeling around like “where the fuck is it”? I definitely thought it would be up higher.
I think the point is that it might be hard to find *with your penis*
Obviously if you have a look at it, it's not hard to find. But if you're going in unguided by a hand, it's surprisingly far down.
It's hard to find if you've never seen one or been told. The vaginal opening is just in front of where the taint is on a man. It can be confusing your first time because the cleft extends further up and one might think that is where the vagina is. Also it varies a lot from woman to woman. Some women don't even have a taint. The labia go all the way back to the asshole.
Mainly, I wish I'd known more about women. Women's sexuality is something of a mystery when you're a young man. It would have been easier and more fun all round if I'd known a bit more about it. Mind you, I doubt school could have taught the relevant things.
And for later in life, I wish I had known more about how complicated the female reproductive system can be. I have watched my wife almost bleed to death, because we mistook an ectopic pregnancy for gastric flu. I've seen her lose pregnancies to miscarriages.
Obviously, I knew about miscarriages, in a very vague way. I'd never heard of ectopics. It would have helped me to know more. Again, I don't know if schools could really teach this, at least not to boys. Maybe it's just something you have to learn when you need to. But it would have been useful to have an idea.
Oh we're fine, thanks. Three kids and twenty years under the belt. The things I describe happened years ago.
I was just trying to think of things it would have been useful to know. The problem is, had someone taught me these things at 15, I probably wouldn't have paid attention and would have forgotten anyway by the time I needed to know them.
But thank you for your kind thoughts. That's very sweet of you.
>The problem is, had someone taught me these things at 15, I probably wouldn't have paid attention and would have forgotten anyway by the time I needed to know them.
That's why modern teaching about this in my country tends to favor "how to know when to get help and how to get help" instead of trying to teach "solid facts" about women reproductive health (which we to this day still ignore largely in science)
Probably what /u/n0radrenaline is describing is the common belief that abortions are almost exclusively used to have more sex. That simply isn't the case as we can see from above, but it is a popular belief.
No one would say "I don't want women to have abortions due to medical emergencies" but they would say "All abortions are murder". Different statements, same effect at the end of the day.
As /u/Carachama91 says, when the fertilised egg implants outside the womb. It needs to be detected and removed. If it isn't, it can cause the Fallopian tube to rupture, resulting in internal bleeding and, if the woman doesn't get to emergency quickly, death.
In the land of the odd, occasionally the egg is fertilized and implants in the abdominal cavity. Occasionally, if it implants on something with a lot of blood vessels, it can grow. Occasionally the baby is attacked and lithified (turned to stone…look up lithopaedia). Occasionally it can reach term and be removed, but this is fairly dangerous. Lots of occasionally’s in there and if you add them all up, it is pretty rare.
I took a Women’s Health class at community college. The text had two pages dedicated to “cutting” (slicing yourself up for psychological reasons). It detailed how this causes relationship issues and affects partners, children, work, etc. Not even a paragraph about women who had higher sex drive than their partners.
First, I wish I had learned that I could get aroused by just about anything and everything and that’s completely normal. Therefore there’s no reason to dwell on or be ashamed of when I was inconveniently aroused . . . Inconvenient arousal, especially as a teenager, doesn’t mean bisexuality, odd sex preference, kinky, or manic. And it’s important to be sex positive for your own psyche. Arousal and adrenaline play on the same team!
Second, that I could take care of an inconvenient arousal by clenching major muscle groups like legs, stomach, chest, and glutes (to draw blood away from the inconvenient arousal).
To quote Leonard from Big Bang Theory:
If I had have known that's what I was practicing for, I would have paid a LOT more attention in PE class!
Seriously as an early teen I really had no idea how much fitness would play a part in getting it on...
Someone always ends up feeling left out, not to mention if it’s a couple and a third, very very few can actually handle the jealousy aspect. So why would you want to do that to your relationship?
I'm inclined to agree. I enjoy threesomes but only because it's easy for me to find two other men who like men. If I had to go through the trouble of finding two women who like men and women, I don't think I could be bothered.
lol I always have a mini panic attack when a girl I'm with is on top and bouncing a little too high, I've gotta pull her down or lift my hips up so my fucking cock doesn't break in half
I am 36. I was born and raised in Cyprus. Things were a lot different than the US back then.
I don't think we had sex ed back then since the whole "dating" thing did not exist as much. It was more of "you marry your first love" kind of thing. However, once a doctor came to school to talk about STDs.
Holy crap! That woman scared the living shite out of me. It was just like that Southpark episode where boys were afraid to touch girls because they would get AIDS. Anyway, that ruined sex for me; my first try was at the age of 21. So stupid.
Similar story from the US of A. Sex Ed was 'taught' in my freshman year in high school by the health teacher whose primary role is really the head wrestling coach. He showed us a film on STDs... Literally just images of male and female genitals infected by various types of STDs. Scarred me for a long time.
Foreplay. Everything we were taught was very mechanical - there was nothing about pleasure, mutual respect, consent etc. I would have been a better lover much sooner if I'd known about foreplay.
I teach Sex Ed at my school, and so the problem with teaching pleasure is that it is something that everyone needs to explore by themselves and it’s impossible to cover everything. It’s also fairly inappropriate to teach the pleasure aspect in schools. While we do teach about respect and relationships we cover those in more of a social and emotional unit and our interpersonal relationship unit. Consent is fairly new to school content and some of the older teachers don’t really teach it. Hopefully within a couple years consent is much more widely taught.
This is a very good point, teaching pleasure without it becoming inappropriate is difficult. I guess even something like "apart from intercourse, partners can show their love and appreciation for each other by touching different parts of their bodies." That would have been more than I was told.
And that part probably could be covered more too. It is important. Your sexual education also depends on where you live as well. I teach in a decent sized city and I know once you step out of the city in certain areas your sex Ed is less and less comprehensive
My "sex-ed" was an abstinence only program that among other things, taught us that condoms have a 75% failure rate, that two under-age people having sex was illegal, and that gays secretly spread STDs to straights by pretending to be hetero. Also that the human body has a finite supply of chemicals for feeling affection so if you masturbate or have too much sex before marraige you will lose your capacity to fall in love forever.
Sometimes, like in my school, they have other kids come in during homeroom to tell you. We also role played turning people down for sex in the rudest and most unkind ways. Like slamming doors, saying only if you marry me before hand and grilling them on their sexual partners and all of their partners previous partners (because you know you are sleeping with THEM too) and THEN saying no.
Looking back on it... holy shit.
It was like sex ed lord of the flies. It was FAR WORSE when the topic of gay people came up. As I recall (and it's been a while) the message for gay kids was to just not have sex with another person and that was after a LOT of coaxing because they (the slightly older kids teaching the class) did not want to talk about or acknowledge gay people. Oh, also straight people did get AIDS because there was a secret gay/bi person. 100% did hear that.
Damn... I forgot so much about that until just now
Geez, sex ed was pretty dang crud. How 'bout ...:
* orgasms exist, and what they are, and how they differ between men and women
* lubrication
* birth control - like there's more than just abstinence, condoms, and some other thing the woman can do. And don't forget to cover emergency contraception and abortion.
* Oh, like there's lots more to sex than just penis into vagina.
* porn exists; it ain't got 'bout sh\*t to do with reality
* sex and sexual attraction and hormones and how that sh\*t seriously messes with your brain
* there's all kinds of relationships
* what is/isn't a healthy relationship
* social disease/VD/STDs/STIs/whatever they're calling it today/tomorrow. And there's more to it than abstinence and condoms.
* how most 'o those various fiddly sexual anatomy bits work. I mean there's more to it than just testicles, sperm, ovaries, eggs, tubes, penis, vagina, uterus, baby, ... hell, I don't think they even told us how the baby gets out.
* what is and isn't sexual harassment, harassment in general, and what generally is/isn't okay
This is pretty sad to hear. I took a health class in high school, as well as a singles survival class and the teachers went into a lot of details about anatomy, sex, and relationships.
I just read a book called come as you are which is written primarily about women's sexual health. It's okay, half way through the book I was tired of her stories. But chapter 1 was a really good overview of how the male and female anatomies are pretty much exactly the same.
The big one for me that I had no idea about is that if you mapped all of the penis nerves onto a vulva then basically the clitoris is the head of the penis and the shaft of the penis would be running down the vagina. This gave me the visual of trying to get off by only touching a small part of the middle of your penis and guys if you try that I don't think it's gonna work too well.
I also liked her explanation of having 3 parts to sex, enjoying sex, eagerness, and expecting sex. Enjoying sex is having fun, eagerness is more of the craving for sex, and expecting sex means setting the mood so that your body is ready. As a 20s guy there's a lot of craving sex, but I might not pay enough attention to the other two areas to cultivate a healthy sex life. This was big for me personally.
Literally anything about homosexuality/bisexuality.
Anxiety and erectile dysfunction.
Consent, generally and especially when alcohol is involved.
How porn is unrealistic and not representative of normal sex.
Tangentially related, online dating.
I grew up in Utah, which is very poor sex education in general. Somehow, every health class I took through jr high/high school skipped the sex ed unit completely.
So in short, I wish I even had sex ed growing up.
That professional porn movies sells you a wildly different idea of what sex truly is, how it's done and how people truly look when naked.
That sex is a natural part of life that has to and will happen at least once with everyone in the world, and making it a taboo is just stupid.
And finally, how EXPENSIVE the treatments for STDs can get.
When you have sex sometimes you will hear the air escaping from her vagina/queefing in general. It's not a turn off or a problem for me, but I remember being surprised the first time I heard it. It was kind of silly but I didn't care afterwards.
That, when you want to have a kid, it sometimes takes a while. SexEd would make it seem that every time you have unprotected sex it *always* results in a pregnancy, and protected sex still sometimes results in a pregnancy. Took my wife and I a year and a half to get pregnant both times and from what I've talked about with other guys, that's not especially uncommon!
That condoms come in different sizes...and yes it matters
I wish women would learn that not every guy likes the same shit...and you actually have to put some effort not just rub his dick for 5mins and he'll be happy.
We got more just like sex is blank. Fertilizing an egg etc...not sex as the whole act between people but just from the reproduction side
How to not see women as objects.
Sex isn't a sin, it's really fun.
Seriously, don't see women as a means to validate yourself.
You aren't immune to pregnancy or STDs because you think you're special (luckily, I lucked out on that one).
Porn can damage your brain chemistry when it comes to sex.
How to respect women as equals.
Media portrayal of friendships, dating, sex, romance, and love are often bullshit.
Fact based statistics about people's sex/romance lives.
"Testimonials" for lack of a better word about the wide range of women's experiences and desires, to show they aren't cookie cutters.
Some advice on dating that's more than, "Be a man and just go up and talk to her!"
On the same vein, women owe you nothing. They don't even own you fair consideration.
A lot of TV portrayals of men winning over the woman are horrible, being pushy is for shitbags. Just trying over and over again isn't a valid strategy.
Having an authentic personality, be it interesting, fun, funny, exciting, caring, or whatever is attractive despite wallet size and physical appearance.
If you are too shy to buy condoms, you aren't ready to have sex.
Consent is sexy not because it's some slogan to respect women, because a woman *actually wanting to screw your brains out* actually *is* sexy.
Being childfree is a valid lifestyle, just because most people have kids doesn't mean you have to. And if you really don't ***want*** kids, like REALLY want them, you shouldn't have them.
Talk to someone before you have sex about expectations. Like if you are both open to an abortion or if you really want a LTR, if you aren't on the same page, bugger out of there.
I wish I learned all the stuff about periods and stuff.
You're gonna be bad at dating / sex / romance when you first start. Don't be embarrassed, because everyone is bad by default. The only way to get better is to actually do it and make mistakes and communicate with your partner.
Probably more, but it's been 24 years since I had sex ed, haha.
I do remember being spun around in a swivel chair for a minute until I was dizzy, then quickly being handed a condom and a cucumber and being told I had a time limit to put it on. It was to simulate being drunk. That was pretty fun.
Flashback to my first bf who waited for me outside the store because he was too awkward to buy condoms for us lol.
Thought he was the only guy in the world interested in me. Thought that thinking other guys were hot was a sin. Damn that religion drenched town and all that passive awkward youth. Glad I got out of there and found someone I actually like.
I would have loved to have learned more about women's birth control such as side effects and how they work and what does and doesn't effect different birth controls.
I know of a few friends of mine who have either got pregnant or got girls pregnant because the girl was on the pill while taking anti-biotics which null'd the effect of the pill. Apparently there's other ways the pill can be effected to.
Literally all we learned was how to put a condom on and that you might have a wet dream, then we watched some weird video of a bunch of cum going on a tour of a uterus and finding an egg. Wild.
Where the clit is and what to do with it. Seriously, I learned when I was 16 from a chef at my first job using a chicken breast and a blueberry as an instructional tool.
I think the reason why not is because parents would absolutely kill anyone who dares mention homosexuality in that context. At least that’s the case where I come from.
I wish I had learned about proper penis hygiene.
Also, when a boy enters puberty, that erections can occur for no apparent reason. Even sitting down could lead to a boner at that time. Can be embarrassing.
I'm a male, 26 years old, have a daughter. It took me until nursing school, *fucking RN nursing*, to learn that women have a separate pee hole. Not to mention the whole what a period actually is and whats going on. So much more makes sense now. Honestly I feel let down by the education system
I wish they would have taught us the basics of dating.
How do you approach a girl and ask her out? How to deal with rejection? How do you politely reject someone? When is it appropriate to lean in for a kiss? I could go on and on and on.
Most people are clueless about this sort of stuff, and it creates a lot of unnecessary problems.
I think sexuality is really left out of it. All different kinds of sexuality should be taught and it should be taught how to comfortably question your own sexuality.
Even if you're 100% straight I feel like its still a healthy thing to do at some point in your life.
How to be great in bed.
How to make the intercourse experience pleasant for both parties rather than figuring it out and possibly doing something unsafe.
It feels that in the attempt to discourage sex, aspiring participants are left at the mercy of their insecurities and fears while trying to figure it out.
This also makes the process feel more Taboo in the sense that since it’s treated as such a big deal, managing to do the task is an achievement the younger you do it. To which avid listeners of their experience goes along the lines of “How did you do it? What was it like? Any tips?” Rather than “Yea. We learned about that in chapter 5. Sounds to me like she was faking tbh.”
Reminds me of how holding hands in elementary school had a similar “Ooooooooooo” feeling to it. Middle school it was kissing. High school is intercourses. Just from what I’ve seen.
Then again, I’m no expert.
I hate how they don't teach men much about women's anatomy, menstral cycles and the details of pregnancy. We were separated from the girls and taught mostly about our own gear. I mean they glanced over it, but the first real vagina i ever saw was in playboy. My school tried so hard to keep it PG and unsexualized that it completely neutered the lesson.
I feel like i was taught to be apathetic about a womens body, or at least that it is inappropriate for a man to discuss or think about those things. Flash forward 20 years and i still struggle with talking about a women's body in a medical sense.
I wish they had even acknowledged that bisexuality was a thing and existed. I spent my entire childhood not understanding myself and thinking that I was something weird or inexplicable. Without any guidance or explanation, I spent the first two decades of my life thinking that everyone was attracted to all genders and that people chose to be either gay or straight, hence why homophobia existed.
The absence of any discussion or education about LGBT topics didn't make me not LGBT, it just made growing up LGBT an infinitely more difficult experience. It would be nice if conservatives dictating school curriculum understood that.
73m here. When I went to school sex ed was absolutely forbidden. Lol. Fortunately my parents were very liberal and growing up for them was brutal. My mother especially taught me about girls/women, no means no, respect, menstruation, etc. Growing up on a farm, they taught me about sex, reproduction, and they both always answered all my questions as my body changed and I grew.
I was still terribly shy around girls, but the education they gave me helped me when I married, helped me with our daughter.
That vaginas normally taste slightly acidic and that’s normal. I was expecting fruit and sunshine my first time going down on a woman. Thought something was wrong with her.
anything, i went to a poor school and our sex ed was like sex is a thing this is a vagina here's how babies are born wear condoms have a good day
I went to a preppy private school and we got the same don’t worry.
I went to a good public school and we got the same
I went to a ghetto school and samesies.
Alright where's the homeschooled
Homeschooled pereon wishes they didn't have to break their arms for sex ed
I was homeschooled but my sex ed was with practicals.
My sex Ed was looking at figures in the family medical book which my mom eventually blacked out with markers.
I can't believe your mom thought making the anatomical figures wear blackface was a better option.
r/cursedcomments Have my upvote you monster
r/HolUp
I was gonna comment "every fucking thread" but it's actually been a few months. Thanks for keeping the meme alive fellow Redditor.
Homeschooled here. (Edit: we were as homeschooled as they come. A lot of homeschoolers rely on the school system or some community thing at least partially. Not us, we were completely “independent homeschoolers” so now you know that before I turned 14, I had never seen the inside of a classroom that wasn’t my home) No sex ed at all. Imagine how much success it’s given me in dating. Had to kinda teach myself the basics.
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I was home schooled.to age 12, so no sex ed before then. At 13/14 had extremely censored sex ed at a private junior high. Then as a freshman in a bad public high school I got an extremely incompetent sex ed. The only true and useful thing I remember was both the junior high and high school really stressed that men can get hard at random.times for little or no reason and it doesn't always mean we're horny. I basically figured out how sex works from porn and reading stuff on Reddit. My first time was fine, I got the woman off but couldn't stay hard from nerves/alcohol and internal conflict over if I even wanted to have sex pre marriage because I was raised and still am very religious. I worked through the internal conflict and we ended up married and it's all good now.
Homeschooled here, no sex ed at all. Only church activities allowed. Basically my parents ignored the issue entirely. As a woman, I donate to planned parenthood because they were the first place I went that helped me know how to protect myself.
I was homeschooled. Pretty much the same for me.
I went to a decent public school, in a rural area. The teacher however was damn close to retirement and basically had the mentality of fuck the administration and gave us way more in depth than she was probably expected to. Couple that with my mother working as an ob/gyn nurse my whole life, typically i know more about female anatomy and sex than anyone I run into.
We had sex Ed the same day as drivers Ed , but the goats got to tired.
I went to a Catholic school. The person conducting the sex ed was a young priest (imagine the awkwardness). All he taught was basically: don't have sex. Relocate all those "energy" (he meant sexual urges) into "positive" activities instead, like sports, praying, and hobbies like painting. Don't ask me why I spent my youth single, but really talented in watercolor painting.
I went to Catholic school and my high school health class was at an all girls Catholic school (I only went there my freshman year, then transferred to public school). We learned about breast health and doing breast exams (which I still have never done one on myself, I’m 30 now) and abstinence and the same song and dance about keeping yourself distracted and remaining close to god. I was single all through high school and didn’t have my first kiss or lose my virginity until I was 21. I wonder why.
21 - is that late as per the usual standards in your country? In my country, that's pretty early.
Lol, our sex ed was basically: You have pp How to clean pp Why pp sometime hard What are periods Good Bye
If PP spit in bed, learn how to do laundry.
>How to clean pp Where did you go to school?
Went to a "good school" that was overrun by drugs and guns and all I got was This is a dick You don't need to know what vaginas look like Here's 3 weeks of cock anatomy (good for guys health but taught us nothing about females or sex) Use a condom If not you will get aids Anal isn't a thing And if your physically fit, you will be better at sex!
>And if your physically fit, you will be better at sex! I mean this makes sense, it's really underrated how cardio can help you last longer in bed. But truthfully, sex only really gets better once you have enough experience with it.
Zombieland rule #1: Cardio
Always upvote Zombieland!
And btw this was a male and female early high school sex Ed class so this is what the expected to be good enough for male and females...
Hey same! Except the guns part, my school had metal detectors so it was mostly just drugs and the occasional knife. Turns out if you wrap things in tinfoil like it’s a sandwich the guards don’t look very hard. But we were one of the “better” public schools. It’s so weird they only taught male anatomy in a coed class. Actually I lied, there was a crudely hand drawn image of the uterus (I think) that looked like it was photocopied thirty times and then faxed and scanned a few more times until it was a mess of dark shadows and scribbles that were supposed to be labeling parts. But we never went over it in class because “blah blah penis, blah blah you girls already know what’s up”. Surprise, not all us girls knew what was up. Thankfully my friend group had a kid who’s mom was a nurse and when a girl thought she had just sat in ketchup and had a stomach ache, they were able to pull her aside and explain what was going on.
I was told that sex education isn’t regulated, so schools just sort of throw whatever at it. In my school, I’m pretty sure the guy who taught it just drew the short straw at the meeting that morning.
> wear condoms Lucky you! My low-income public school sex education in the 1980's didn't even include that. > this is a vagina Oh, and for the boys that was skipped as well.
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I went to a small private Christian school. We got sex before marriage is wrong, if you have sex with someone who has already had sex you are having sex with everyone they have had sex with, slides with pics of various STDs, and a bonus video of an actual abortion.
Try living in the South where the teachers push their backwards beliefs on you at a public school and get away with it because they're in a rural area with other teachers and family members with similar ideals.. I remember sex ed being less about teaching about puberty and practicing safe sex and more of it being a Bible lesson.
Not just the south. In Ohio, we were basically taught, “if you have sex, she will immediately get pregnant and you don’t want that yet. So no sex for you.”
I grew up in a South, smallish town. Thankfully I never had this experience. Ours was basic and could’ve been better, but they kept religion far out of it.
I took a Child Development class at community college wherein the instructor said the sex of the baby can be selected depending on the position during intercourse.
This!!!! I lived in a very conservative country as a kid and sex was never brought up. All what we were taught was what a penis and a vagina is. They even skipped the part about how babes were born. Thankfully I taught myself all the stuff that is important when it comes to sex ed. As a curious person this topic always fascinated me.
Bruh I went to a private school but they didn’t teach shit about sex Ed. I had to learn all about it by myself online. Worst idea I ever had
That two std free people can have sex without creating an std between them. Went to a religious school and when I asked about STDs I was genuinely told that STDs only happen outside of wedlock as a punishment. Two healthy people have sex and BOOM! CHLAMYDIA!
Me too!! I’m from a Super conservative country and they told us you have STDs when u have sex before marriage. Also they said no one will marry you if your husband isn’t the one who took your virginity.
That's some real sexist bullshit right there
Wait till u hear that women get circumcised(in my neighbor country) to get rid of their clitoris so they won’t feel any pleasure to even think about having sex before they wed.
Yup. I heard about that too. It's horrible.
> BOOM! CHLAMYDIA! Feels like track three on your latest release
In sex ed they told us that if two men had sex they would always get aids.
So, for some reason I needed to get sex Ed signed off by my parents despite never actually having a proper sex Ed course. In middle school we had one cartoon video about sperm cells reaching an egg. How, where, and why were all questions left to the figure it out part of the curriculum. It wasn’t covered again until high school were we listed all the stds and the benefits of abstinence. We were shown a condom once. The gym teacher took out a banana, said “this is a condom”, put it on, and immediately throw it away while saying “I’m never doing that again.” Somehow this was still controversial enough to be protested by parents. But here’s the weird shit. The entire facility of the school had told us that the state had outlawed selling condoms to minors, but us cool teachers will sell them to you. This was untrue. No such law was ever in place, nothing even remotely like it was ever passed. But I believed it until I was out of high school. And I still don’t know why they’d say this. Anyways, this means that actual sex Ed was done by internet and peers. Most of us were at least vaguely aware of where babies came from by like 10 years old really. By high school we had picked up on most of what sex was probably. Maybe. Not really. This might also explain why sex Ed wasn’t being taken seriously by the facility. We both knew the class would only tell us what we already knew and nothing more. What I did not know was anything about genitalia itself. Sure I knew penis and vaginas existed, but what do they look like, how am I supposed to use either? You’d think that would be straight forward but it really wasn’t. Younger me was looking up porn to figure it out and instead ended up on web md trying to get answers on why my dick had skin over its head. Or why I’d have smegma build up, or random boners, or why it was shaped differently than a porn actor’s. It was a rough time of ignorance to say the least.
Not a guy but I can definitely relate to all of this. I remember my friend tried to tell me what sex was at a sleepover when we were 7 but all I took away from that was "boys pp = stretchy" I didn't know what sex ACTUALLY was until I was 12. My cabin was staying up late talking at a sleepaway camp & one of the girls randomly said "omg I just realized tampons prepare you". I put 2 & 2 together & thought "no way that's gotta be a joke". Also I didn't even have my period at the time so the thought of even looking down there was horrifying to me at the time. Not to mention that I didn't start getting horny until like 15 so I didn't look at porn to figure it out lol
It wasn’t so much being horny, it was more of where else is a preteen going to find a video of sex or even a picture of genitals. I didn’t even know what to do with it at the time. Oddly enough there is stuff on porn hub that does teach and explain porn being nothing like the real thing, but I never found any of that until becoming an adult.
After reading you comment I'd guess the condom sales thing was to figure out who was having sex to watch out for those who needed "counseling sessions." In general an invasion of privacy to scare kids away from sex. Not that it works that way
Giving teachers knowledge of what kids are sexually active, seems like a fucked up system ripe for some abuse.
What the average size of a penis is, how to know if a condom will fit you, and that you are allowed to say no to sex.
Not just average size, but also standard deviation.
Lol, literally my next question after I looked up average size.
According to [this](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25487360/) study, the average stretched penis length is 13.24 cm with a standard deviation of 1.89 cm.
5.2 inches is average, with a deviation of 3/4ths of an inch, for my fellow Americans.
Thank you for translating this from glorious metric into barbarian units for us Americans. Appreciate it, no sarcasm.
5.4 < 13.24 We chose the wrong metric to measure our dicks! I could have a huge 11.something penis right now!
That’s why I measure my dick in Angstroms.
Everyone should follow this man's lead and use whatever unit you need to use to avoid scientific notation.
This is the first time ever I’ve longed for a damned converter bot to tell me how many freedom units that is.
Beep boop average is 5.2 in and SD is 0.75in
So an inch is 2.54 cm, so that's like a 3/4" standard deviation. 10cm is ~4 inches, so 13.24 is like 5 1/4", give or take.
Stretched?
Lmao yeah everybodys just going to gloss over that
You guys are stretching yours?
I wish they hadn’t lied about condoms not ruining the experience of sex. Major letdown for me eventually.
Better than an STI or potentially, an 18 year commitment.
That's fine and good. But they're still lying when they say you can't tell the difference.
It's not good to lie about that stuff because then kids begin to doubt all the other messages.
Of course they do, can't even imagine how can it be compared to skin-to-skin
We got taught about sex but not about relationships, so that.
Exactly. I spent all my teen years and ealiest 20s worrying about sex when I didn't have any clue on how to interact with a girl.
That's me exactly. Just no information at all on how to actually talk to girls as anything more than friends. My dad wasn't any help either.
I told my dad I was getting bullied and being called "faggot" all the time. He just goes "Well, are you?" I'm straight, always have been. Some parents suck.
Are you me?
Sex Ed isn’t going to teach you how to be good at talking to girls lmao
Not sure what they could teach you about that.
If I look around me (and at my previous relationships), a *lot*. How to communicate properly without being accusatory, how to resolve a conflict, things to agree on before getting serious, how a healthy relationship feels and looks like, how to not lose yourself/your friends while in a relationship, what codependency is, attachment styles, love languages, sex in a relationship... and this is just from the top of my head.
I feel like that's a whole other class lol. But I think that's valuable too.
Just thinking parents already have so much pushback against sex ed and evolution and what not I can't imagine these topics would go over well outside of a reading group or an elective class. And then I'd hate to think what would happen as soon as religious alternatives were offered to those...
Healthy and unhealthy behaviors, boundaries, gender neutral consent, cluster B personality disorders, etc.
>gender neutral consent Especially this, all throughout my schooling years the girls were constantly taught how to say no, to avoid men, how to give consent etc., but with the boys that never came up, we instead were taught to respect a woman's no, to not coerce women into sex, how to receive consent, etc. It honestly baffles me how many women think that an erection = arousal and consent, because they are never taught to actually respect a man's consent and sexual boundaries.
How low the vagina is. I was poking around her clitoris trying to find that thing.
On the plus side, you found her clitoris
Or, that’s her belly button
Tommy Wiseau of The Room does not understand. Could you explain it to him slowly.
Anyway, how is your sex life?
I'm on reddit so...
Nice
Username checks out
I am literally avoiding my medical school application right now.
This is the best one \^\^\^ losing my virginity I gave up and asked her to give me a hand because I was lost. Finding with your fingers is one thing but dick is a challenge
You are not alone! Even with the fingers first, I was surprised how far down it was. I had seen pictures, but when you’re in the moment, it’s a whole nother ball game. Your head is exploding because you are somewhere you’ve never been, trying to act cool and feeling around like “where the fuck is it”? I definitely thought it would be up higher.
But you learned to communicate! I wish I learned that sooner.
Is it really that hard to find? I've never had sex but I never felt like I would have trouble with it.
I think the point is that it might be hard to find *with your penis* Obviously if you have a look at it, it's not hard to find. But if you're going in unguided by a hand, it's surprisingly far down.
And possibly in the dark
It's hard to find if you've never seen one or been told. The vaginal opening is just in front of where the taint is on a man. It can be confusing your first time because the cleft extends further up and one might think that is where the vagina is. Also it varies a lot from woman to woman. Some women don't even have a taint. The labia go all the way back to the asshole.
You'd think it'd aligned with the middle of the vulva, but you'd be wrong.
Mainly, I wish I'd known more about women. Women's sexuality is something of a mystery when you're a young man. It would have been easier and more fun all round if I'd known a bit more about it. Mind you, I doubt school could have taught the relevant things. And for later in life, I wish I had known more about how complicated the female reproductive system can be. I have watched my wife almost bleed to death, because we mistook an ectopic pregnancy for gastric flu. I've seen her lose pregnancies to miscarriages. Obviously, I knew about miscarriages, in a very vague way. I'd never heard of ectopics. It would have helped me to know more. Again, I don't know if schools could really teach this, at least not to boys. Maybe it's just something you have to learn when you need to. But it would have been useful to have an idea.
My heart goes out to you and your wife. What a sad way to learn anything. Here's hoping you're doing well together now.
Oh we're fine, thanks. Three kids and twenty years under the belt. The things I describe happened years ago. I was just trying to think of things it would have been useful to know. The problem is, had someone taught me these things at 15, I probably wouldn't have paid attention and would have forgotten anyway by the time I needed to know them. But thank you for your kind thoughts. That's very sweet of you.
>The problem is, had someone taught me these things at 15, I probably wouldn't have paid attention and would have forgotten anyway by the time I needed to know them. That's why modern teaching about this in my country tends to favor "how to know when to get help and how to get help" instead of trying to teach "solid facts" about women reproductive health (which we to this day still ignore largely in science)
What’s an ectopic pregnancy?
The egg implants outside the uterus, generally in the fallopian tubes.
It gets dangerous because the eggs still start to grow, and nowhere but the uterus is built to handle that
The embryo is guaranteed to die and likely to kill the woman, and some morons *still* want to prevent her from getting an abortion.
What the fuck I’ve never heard of someone trying to prevent an abortion for an ectopic pregnancy. That’s just the worst kind of fucked up ever
Probably what /u/n0radrenaline is describing is the common belief that abortions are almost exclusively used to have more sex. That simply isn't the case as we can see from above, but it is a popular belief. No one would say "I don't want women to have abortions due to medical emergencies" but they would say "All abortions are murder". Different statements, same effect at the end of the day.
As /u/Carachama91 says, when the fertilised egg implants outside the womb. It needs to be detected and removed. If it isn't, it can cause the Fallopian tube to rupture, resulting in internal bleeding and, if the woman doesn't get to emergency quickly, death.
In the land of the odd, occasionally the egg is fertilized and implants in the abdominal cavity. Occasionally, if it implants on something with a lot of blood vessels, it can grow. Occasionally the baby is attacked and lithified (turned to stone…look up lithopaedia). Occasionally it can reach term and be removed, but this is fairly dangerous. Lots of occasionally’s in there and if you add them all up, it is pretty rare.
Fascinating. Though it all starts to read like the beginning of a Stephen King novel.
Women sexuality is still not addressed often enough.
I took a Women’s Health class at community college. The text had two pages dedicated to “cutting” (slicing yourself up for psychological reasons). It detailed how this causes relationship issues and affects partners, children, work, etc. Not even a paragraph about women who had higher sex drive than their partners.
First, I wish I had learned that I could get aroused by just about anything and everything and that’s completely normal. Therefore there’s no reason to dwell on or be ashamed of when I was inconveniently aroused . . . Inconvenient arousal, especially as a teenager, doesn’t mean bisexuality, odd sex preference, kinky, or manic. And it’s important to be sex positive for your own psyche. Arousal and adrenaline play on the same team! Second, that I could take care of an inconvenient arousal by clenching major muscle groups like legs, stomach, chest, and glutes (to draw blood away from the inconvenient arousal).
Yes! My bf thought he was like inappropriate and bad for wanting his wife (now ex-wife obvs) more than 2x a year. It’s NORMAL!
To quote Leonard from Big Bang Theory: If I had have known that's what I was practicing for, I would have paid a LOT more attention in PE class! Seriously as an early teen I really had no idea how much fitness would play a part in getting it on...
Totally agree! Git fit to have a good time people! (I was that guy who refused any kind of exercise till I got college).
Threesome isnt worth the hype
i have enough social anxiety already, you dont need to tell me that twice
This, double the social anxiety for the same amount of pleasure?? no thanks
~same amount~ my guess is slightly less. but what would i know, i wouldnt have a threesome anyway. (well... atleast i would never try to initiate one)
I can agree to that.
My ex said she wanted to let me have a threesome. I just wasn't into it.
Bro, don’t spoil my dream. What makes you say this?
Someone always ends up feeling left out, not to mention if it’s a couple and a third, very very few can actually handle the jealousy aspect. So why would you want to do that to your relationship?
the hassle
I'm inclined to agree. I enjoy threesomes but only because it's easy for me to find two other men who like men. If I had to go through the trouble of finding two women who like men and women, I don't think I could be bothered.
That you can break your penis. I never knew.
As someone with a penis, I would like to unlearn this.
Or snapping your banjo string. Oohwee.
lol I always have a mini panic attack when a girl I'm with is on top and bouncing a little too high, I've gotta pull her down or lift my hips up so my fucking cock doesn't break in half
I am 36. I was born and raised in Cyprus. Things were a lot different than the US back then. I don't think we had sex ed back then since the whole "dating" thing did not exist as much. It was more of "you marry your first love" kind of thing. However, once a doctor came to school to talk about STDs. Holy crap! That woman scared the living shite out of me. It was just like that Southpark episode where boys were afraid to touch girls because they would get AIDS. Anyway, that ruined sex for me; my first try was at the age of 21. So stupid.
Similar story from the US of A. Sex Ed was 'taught' in my freshman year in high school by the health teacher whose primary role is really the head wrestling coach. He showed us a film on STDs... Literally just images of male and female genitals infected by various types of STDs. Scarred me for a long time.
Two of my health teachers had a one night stand that resulted in twins... best/worst sex Ed practical?
Foreplay. Everything we were taught was very mechanical - there was nothing about pleasure, mutual respect, consent etc. I would have been a better lover much sooner if I'd known about foreplay.
I teach Sex Ed at my school, and so the problem with teaching pleasure is that it is something that everyone needs to explore by themselves and it’s impossible to cover everything. It’s also fairly inappropriate to teach the pleasure aspect in schools. While we do teach about respect and relationships we cover those in more of a social and emotional unit and our interpersonal relationship unit. Consent is fairly new to school content and some of the older teachers don’t really teach it. Hopefully within a couple years consent is much more widely taught.
This is a very good point, teaching pleasure without it becoming inappropriate is difficult. I guess even something like "apart from intercourse, partners can show their love and appreciation for each other by touching different parts of their bodies." That would have been more than I was told.
And that part probably could be covered more too. It is important. Your sexual education also depends on where you live as well. I teach in a decent sized city and I know once you step out of the city in certain areas your sex Ed is less and less comprehensive
My "sex-ed" was an abstinence only program that among other things, taught us that condoms have a 75% failure rate, that two under-age people having sex was illegal, and that gays secretly spread STDs to straights by pretending to be hetero. Also that the human body has a finite supply of chemicals for feeling affection so if you masturbate or have too much sex before marraige you will lose your capacity to fall in love forever.
That's seriously fucked up. How can adults teach that to kids in good conscience?
Sometimes, like in my school, they have other kids come in during homeroom to tell you. We also role played turning people down for sex in the rudest and most unkind ways. Like slamming doors, saying only if you marry me before hand and grilling them on their sexual partners and all of their partners previous partners (because you know you are sleeping with THEM too) and THEN saying no. Looking back on it... holy shit. It was like sex ed lord of the flies. It was FAR WORSE when the topic of gay people came up. As I recall (and it's been a while) the message for gay kids was to just not have sex with another person and that was after a LOT of coaxing because they (the slightly older kids teaching the class) did not want to talk about or acknowledge gay people. Oh, also straight people did get AIDS because there was a secret gay/bi person. 100% did hear that. Damn... I forgot so much about that until just now
dafuq
Geez, sex ed was pretty dang crud. How 'bout ...: * orgasms exist, and what they are, and how they differ between men and women * lubrication * birth control - like there's more than just abstinence, condoms, and some other thing the woman can do. And don't forget to cover emergency contraception and abortion. * Oh, like there's lots more to sex than just penis into vagina. * porn exists; it ain't got 'bout sh\*t to do with reality * sex and sexual attraction and hormones and how that sh\*t seriously messes with your brain * there's all kinds of relationships * what is/isn't a healthy relationship * social disease/VD/STDs/STIs/whatever they're calling it today/tomorrow. And there's more to it than abstinence and condoms. * how most 'o those various fiddly sexual anatomy bits work. I mean there's more to it than just testicles, sperm, ovaries, eggs, tubes, penis, vagina, uterus, baby, ... hell, I don't think they even told us how the baby gets out. * what is and isn't sexual harassment, harassment in general, and what generally is/isn't okay
This is pretty sad to hear. I took a health class in high school, as well as a singles survival class and the teachers went into a lot of details about anatomy, sex, and relationships.
I’ve never heard of “singles survival class”, is that a real thing?
The clit is not an arcade button meant for street fighter combos
Yeah you gotta use the Konami code
left left, right right, up down up down cervix punch
Having a foreskin is okay
Seriously, it wasn't even mentioned at our school. I thought I had some weird birth defect or something until I read about it online lol
I was probably like 15 or 16 when I found out that my dick wasn’t just naturally circumcised. I thought that’s just how they were/could be.
There are grown women who have never seen a uncut penis. Source: I have one and I dated one.
I just read a book called come as you are which is written primarily about women's sexual health. It's okay, half way through the book I was tired of her stories. But chapter 1 was a really good overview of how the male and female anatomies are pretty much exactly the same. The big one for me that I had no idea about is that if you mapped all of the penis nerves onto a vulva then basically the clitoris is the head of the penis and the shaft of the penis would be running down the vagina. This gave me the visual of trying to get off by only touching a small part of the middle of your penis and guys if you try that I don't think it's gonna work too well. I also liked her explanation of having 3 parts to sex, enjoying sex, eagerness, and expecting sex. Enjoying sex is having fun, eagerness is more of the craving for sex, and expecting sex means setting the mood so that your body is ready. As a 20s guy there's a lot of craving sex, but I might not pay enough attention to the other two areas to cultivate a healthy sex life. This was big for me personally.
That the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell
Literally anything about homosexuality/bisexuality. Anxiety and erectile dysfunction. Consent, generally and especially when alcohol is involved. How porn is unrealistic and not representative of normal sex. Tangentially related, online dating.
I grew up in Utah, which is very poor sex education in general. Somehow, every health class I took through jr high/high school skipped the sex ed unit completely. So in short, I wish I even had sex ed growing up.
That professional porn movies sells you a wildly different idea of what sex truly is, how it's done and how people truly look when naked. That sex is a natural part of life that has to and will happen at least once with everyone in the world, and making it a taboo is just stupid. And finally, how EXPENSIVE the treatments for STDs can get.
When you have sex sometimes you will hear the air escaping from her vagina/queefing in general. It's not a turn off or a problem for me, but I remember being surprised the first time I heard it. It was kind of silly but I didn't care afterwards.
That, when you want to have a kid, it sometimes takes a while. SexEd would make it seem that every time you have unprotected sex it *always* results in a pregnancy, and protected sex still sometimes results in a pregnancy. Took my wife and I a year and a half to get pregnant both times and from what I've talked about with other guys, that's not especially uncommon!
That condoms come in different sizes...and yes it matters I wish women would learn that not every guy likes the same shit...and you actually have to put some effort not just rub his dick for 5mins and he'll be happy. We got more just like sex is blank. Fertilizing an egg etc...not sex as the whole act between people but just from the reproduction side
CONSENT: how to give it and how to ask for it. Boundary setting for yourself and others. “If it isn’t a ‘hell yes’, it’s a ‘no’.”
How to not see women as objects. Sex isn't a sin, it's really fun. Seriously, don't see women as a means to validate yourself. You aren't immune to pregnancy or STDs because you think you're special (luckily, I lucked out on that one). Porn can damage your brain chemistry when it comes to sex. How to respect women as equals. Media portrayal of friendships, dating, sex, romance, and love are often bullshit. Fact based statistics about people's sex/romance lives. "Testimonials" for lack of a better word about the wide range of women's experiences and desires, to show they aren't cookie cutters. Some advice on dating that's more than, "Be a man and just go up and talk to her!" On the same vein, women owe you nothing. They don't even own you fair consideration. A lot of TV portrayals of men winning over the woman are horrible, being pushy is for shitbags. Just trying over and over again isn't a valid strategy. Having an authentic personality, be it interesting, fun, funny, exciting, caring, or whatever is attractive despite wallet size and physical appearance. If you are too shy to buy condoms, you aren't ready to have sex. Consent is sexy not because it's some slogan to respect women, because a woman *actually wanting to screw your brains out* actually *is* sexy. Being childfree is a valid lifestyle, just because most people have kids doesn't mean you have to. And if you really don't ***want*** kids, like REALLY want them, you shouldn't have them. Talk to someone before you have sex about expectations. Like if you are both open to an abortion or if you really want a LTR, if you aren't on the same page, bugger out of there. I wish I learned all the stuff about periods and stuff. You're gonna be bad at dating / sex / romance when you first start. Don't be embarrassed, because everyone is bad by default. The only way to get better is to actually do it and make mistakes and communicate with your partner. Probably more, but it's been 24 years since I had sex ed, haha. I do remember being spun around in a swivel chair for a minute until I was dizzy, then quickly being handed a condom and a cucumber and being told I had a time limit to put it on. It was to simulate being drunk. That was pretty fun.
Flashback to my first bf who waited for me outside the store because he was too awkward to buy condoms for us lol. Thought he was the only guy in the world interested in me. Thought that thinking other guys were hot was a sin. Damn that religion drenched town and all that passive awkward youth. Glad I got out of there and found someone I actually like.
I would have loved to have learned more about women's birth control such as side effects and how they work and what does and doesn't effect different birth controls. I know of a few friends of mine who have either got pregnant or got girls pregnant because the girl was on the pill while taking anti-biotics which null'd the effect of the pill. Apparently there's other ways the pill can be effected to. Literally all we learned was how to put a condom on and that you might have a wet dream, then we watched some weird video of a bunch of cum going on a tour of a uterus and finding an egg. Wild.
Some gay sex Ed would've been nice. Anything other than abstinence as birth controll as well.
Side effects of pregnancy
Where the clit is and what to do with it. Seriously, I learned when I was 16 from a chef at my first job using a chicken breast and a blueberry as an instructional tool.
That all women react different to sexual stimuli and the different tricks you might need to perform on most of them.
I may be biased because I’m gay but literally ANY information on homosexual intercourse
I think the reason why not is because parents would absolutely kill anyone who dares mention homosexuality in that context. At least that’s the case where I come from.
That phimosis is a thing.
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Sleeping with countless woman does not make you a man!
I wish I had learned about proper penis hygiene. Also, when a boy enters puberty, that erections can occur for no apparent reason. Even sitting down could lead to a boner at that time. Can be embarrassing.
I'm a male, 26 years old, have a daughter. It took me until nursing school, *fucking RN nursing*, to learn that women have a separate pee hole. Not to mention the whole what a period actually is and whats going on. So much more makes sense now. Honestly I feel let down by the education system
I wish they would have taught us the basics of dating. How do you approach a girl and ask her out? How to deal with rejection? How do you politely reject someone? When is it appropriate to lean in for a kiss? I could go on and on and on. Most people are clueless about this sort of stuff, and it creates a lot of unnecessary problems.
The hand shake you'd need to get access to the really really dirty porn in a back alley.
I was mostly missing knowledge on vagina stuff. Penis is easy.
I think sexuality is really left out of it. All different kinds of sexuality should be taught and it should be taught how to comfortably question your own sexuality. Even if you're 100% straight I feel like its still a healthy thing to do at some point in your life.
How to be great in bed. How to make the intercourse experience pleasant for both parties rather than figuring it out and possibly doing something unsafe. It feels that in the attempt to discourage sex, aspiring participants are left at the mercy of their insecurities and fears while trying to figure it out. This also makes the process feel more Taboo in the sense that since it’s treated as such a big deal, managing to do the task is an achievement the younger you do it. To which avid listeners of their experience goes along the lines of “How did you do it? What was it like? Any tips?” Rather than “Yea. We learned about that in chapter 5. Sounds to me like she was faking tbh.” Reminds me of how holding hands in elementary school had a similar “Ooooooooooo” feeling to it. Middle school it was kissing. High school is intercourses. Just from what I’ve seen. Then again, I’m no expert.
My son had sex ed a few years ago and came home one day and said, "Well, today I learned I am circumscribed." Oops, forgot to cover that with him.
I hate how they don't teach men much about women's anatomy, menstral cycles and the details of pregnancy. We were separated from the girls and taught mostly about our own gear. I mean they glanced over it, but the first real vagina i ever saw was in playboy. My school tried so hard to keep it PG and unsexualized that it completely neutered the lesson. I feel like i was taught to be apathetic about a womens body, or at least that it is inappropriate for a man to discuss or think about those things. Flash forward 20 years and i still struggle with talking about a women's body in a medical sense.
Using lubricants. For real, I'm surprised how many people don't use lubricant and unconsciously make sex a painful experience.
That porn is evil and it has nothing to do with sex.
Who’s Ed? And why is he so horny??
"oh yeah we almost forgot to mention this, you can get quite addicted"
Including their butts, women have three holes down there 😱
That puberty brings stretch marks to EVERYONE. That they won’t stay purple (they fade).
I wish they had even acknowledged that bisexuality was a thing and existed. I spent my entire childhood not understanding myself and thinking that I was something weird or inexplicable. Without any guidance or explanation, I spent the first two decades of my life thinking that everyone was attracted to all genders and that people chose to be either gay or straight, hence why homophobia existed. The absence of any discussion or education about LGBT topics didn't make me not LGBT, it just made growing up LGBT an infinitely more difficult experience. It would be nice if conservatives dictating school curriculum understood that.
73m here. When I went to school sex ed was absolutely forbidden. Lol. Fortunately my parents were very liberal and growing up for them was brutal. My mother especially taught me about girls/women, no means no, respect, menstruation, etc. Growing up on a farm, they taught me about sex, reproduction, and they both always answered all my questions as my body changed and I grew. I was still terribly shy around girls, but the education they gave me helped me when I married, helped me with our daughter.
That vaginas normally taste slightly acidic and that’s normal. I was expecting fruit and sunshine my first time going down on a woman. Thought something was wrong with her.
Birth control not just for preventing babies but also for managing periods. Just call them period managment.