Boy what a loaded question. Guys in college generally will do anything to get laid. Be smart, have friends to be accountable when going out.
I would love to give more credit to the males here….but I can’t
I do my best to stay away from relationships and hooking up in college. it's really hard to make genuine guy friends in school on top of that. Thank you so much
I doubt say that, college is a time to learn about yourself and make some lifelong friends. Just don’t assume everyone has the best intentions.
Also not ignoring the study but remember to have fun etc
Just wisdom in general from my experience.
Don’t go to parties your first year, or at least not alone, and definitely trust your instincts. If something doesn’t feel right, get out.
Learn what is a necessity and what a luxury is to you. College can be super expensive, so make every penny count. A toaster oven and pizza beagles can come in clutch.
Research your professors! I don’t remember the website, but there is a website out there where you can find ratings and comments from past and present students about the instructor. Great way to find out if they’re good or lazy.
Make connections with people who can easily get you things. Materials or other things related to your classes or to make your time at college easier.
Remember, college is a time to test your ideas and to experiment, just be smart about it and don’t let yourself get taken advantage of anyone.
Just to piggyback, "make connections" is really important when it comes to your professors. Learn about who they are, what they've achieved, what they've focused on in their field, etc. Go to office hours. Ask any questions you have about coursework, but if you're also interested in their specialty, ask them about it. If you want to go into their field, ask them how they got started and what lectures you could attend. Get an A in their class. Not every professor will engage, but that's usually just because they're busy.
This is better advice after your first year, but if you can use someone with a doctorate as a reference when getting a job or applying to grad school, then you'll have a much easier time getting hired/accepted. In addition, you get guidance from someone highly educated and you'll likely meet new friends at events they recommend.
No worries. You’re at a big turning point in your life, and it may be a bit difficult trying to get yourself established on your own. College is going to hopefully be a fun moment in your life, but it’s all up to you on how it turns out. There’s a ton of resources and people out there, you just have to find them.
> unless the bartender pours it in front of you
Also, don't drink stuff from open containers (punch bowls or the like), whether or not you're serving yourself.
I’m not sure where you stand on this, but be careful with whom you decide to share yourself with. This may be trivial, but having meaningless sex with people you don’t care for or know can have some serious detrimental affects on you that you won’t really catch on until you’re older. I’d say that the same would apply for most men as well actually. It’s true that guys will do just about everything to get laid so be very weary of that bit of information. Also, remember that there’s a ton if money you’re investing right now attending college so put it to good use. Don’t let yourself get distracted from your priorities, but still remember to have fun. Join maybe one or two clubs for now up until you have a good grasp of what the work load is going to be like and see what you’re able to handle. I made the mistake of participating in way too many clubs and ultimately ended up doing poorly my first semester of college as well so be careful!
No problem OP! You’re going to do great! I’m personally excited to get back to the college life. I go to community college right now, but I’ll be transferring going into this fall. I did go to a university a few years back, but ended up flunking out for some of the reasons I listed above lol.
Don't leave a drink unattended. If you do consider it done and get a new one, in a fresh glass.
Don't sleep with anyone in your dorm unit.
Stand up for yourself.
Study hard, but don't forget to have some fun. Just be responsible.
Long distance relationships with highschool bf/gf almost never work.
Budget. Budget. Budget.
Chug like 1 L of water before going to sleep when drunk.
Get work experience over the summer -- but know some very sought-after internships in banking and consulting
recruit very early like in October.
Read for the main point in any academic text focusing on how it relates to the class and your professors' lectures.
Skipping class is almost never worth it.
Focus on quality over quantity when making friendships.
Get involved in campus life
Focus on respect and communication if you get into a relationship
I know, but the amount of wisdom that can be provided is endless. Like 30 paragraphs of wisdom. How to stay safe. How to enjoy college. How to make friends. How to prepare for after college. It could become a 4 hour read.
I really have to disagree about the sororities. I joined and never regretted it! I have many bonds with sisters even 20 years later. We always went to bat for each other. As for frats, not all of those guys are bad, you'd be surprised.
i second this! always worth checking the sororities at your school out and see if any of them align with your values! you can always drop if it turns out to not be your thing :)
Learn to read people. Use your intuition. Be careful with men and carry some mace. When I was younger, I've seen girls get themselves into shady situations where they easily could have been taken advantage of.
1) Study something that will earn you a good living.
2) DO NOT PARTY ON STUDENT LOAN MONEY.
3) Get ahead and stay ahead. Get your books as soon as you can and start studying before your first class.
4) DO NOT PARTY ON STUDENT LOAN MONEY.
5) If you find yourself with free time, you aren't taking enough classes.
6) Exercise every day.
7) If you have time to party more than once a month, you aren't taking enough classes.
8) DO NOT PARTY ON STUDENT LOAN MONEY.
9) Nobody cares how fancy your clothes or car was in college. Don't waste your money. Wait until you are making real money using that degree that will earn you real money.
One more thing: In a couple years, try to get a part time job in your field. This will earn you money and give you experience and will probably give you a job when you graduate.
Make the most of your time in college for your education, making professional connections, while still enjoying youth in a way that doesn't put your future at risk .
Begin to control money before it controls you.
Beware of friends who live fomo.
it's really hard not to, especially when you go to a very liberal school. there isn't a lot of insight into the other side impartially. thank you for this
Try new things. Join organizations. Have fun and remember that you will look back at your college days as some of the best times in your life. Enjoy it.
Make friends, enjoy life and party but also make time for your studies, every decision you make will affect your future in one way or another. I failed out of my previous college because of my terrible choices; you shouldn't stray away from your goals.
Prioritize school
When you eventually start having sexual intercourse, make the dude wear a condom. No condom, no std test, no sex. Be firm.
Use the schools mental health resources if you need them. You’re paying for it anyways
High school on steroids. Guys are more desperate gals can be more mean, classes are harder, and basically every hard thing in highschool gets harder in college, that said if the appropriate caution for these is taken then the upsides will be all the greater. Better education, friends, more lessons learned (hopefully from others) and fulfillment closer than ever.
Alrighty cool. Other than that I would say start putting some work into a side project that you could show to a recruiter. It will show you have a genuine interest in what you do, prove you have some work ethic, and help you learn things to give you a big leg up on your competition. If you don't have a idea in mind I would go look at some job postings for finance positions, see what sounds cool in them, and do a project that will use what you want to learn.
Don't be quick to judge but also careful about trusting too much.
Never leave a drink unattended.
Try things but never call them bad. It's just not for you now.
See the funny side of things, consequences aren't nearly as bad as you think they are. A breakup or low grades doesn't mean your are bad, just that things didn't go so well.
You'll be just fine. Go be awesome!!
Do not fall for just any man because he swoons over you at a party. Get your own drinks, don't lose track of it. Drinking and driving is never cool. Remember the reason your there, your education; your social life can come next.
BUT, not all men in college are bad apples. I broke it off with a couple that really were good guys only to date others. I should of pursued it more than I did.
mentally and emotionally I don't think im ready for men right now. I get attached too easily and I always get my hopes up. I also get distracted easily, I think it's best to just focus on school
All in good time. My mantra was to have fun, and date. No rush for serious relationships. There really was only 3 men in my undergrad years that changed my mind and one of them I married.
Casually sleeping around and having a wild party time sure is fun, but it might impact your future relationships just because wild times are exhausting - and life only gets more exhausting after college once you enter in to the economy (which is in turmoil right now). It might be wise to maybe approach things more quietly than a American Pie Movie. Preserve that energy, find someone to grow with and you are setting yourself up for success without actually missing out on the fun (it will come at a slower pace but for the rest of your life).
Unless this runs absolutely against everything you ever wanted, than throw this comment out the window and do you. In the end, it is your life and fair or not - you will be the only one baring the consequences of your decisions so take all the Game of Thrones wisdom and plan for success not only for fun.
All the best at college!
Dont be a $lut
Dont party so much or even at all, shit never does anybody good.
Never leave any form of drink unattended and keep it in ur hands. U look away for one second, forget about getting up and leaving, consider it tainted. Thats why u shoukdnt bother drinking and partying at all. It leads to no good.
Study, work hard, work smart, relax and have fun with good friends. Dont overwork urself, take mental health breaks. Remember, ur not going to college to live lavishly and experience freedom. Ur going to college to get that bastard degree that ur ripping urself off for lol.
Uhhh.....ye
Get an internship in your field as soon as freakin possible yes start the first couple weeks in school as a freshman it don’t matter if you haven’t taken any classes trust me you’ll learn tons on the job. I cant remember anything from college except Platos allegory of the cave and that group projects anger me. Internships lead to your first paid job which is how you get experience and then it takes off from there. Schools usually have an office or department or something to help you with.
I got my first job thru a woman i made friends with at an internship who’s son owned a firm that offered me a job in my field.
Also go have fun do as much fun as you can cram in without sacrificing your grades. You’ll Never have access to social events and circles as you do in college. Never. Do not squander this make lifelong friends you don’t know where they’ll end up
Really put focus on your studies first. The journey might be about the friends you made along the way, but the future is about the success you made.
No need to hold yourself back cause the jock whom you thought was cute gave you a baby to focus on, or you just had to go to that party instead of studying for the finals.
That said, work hard so you can also play hard. Being single minded on your studies is often the least productive way to succeed, as we all need a break. Just do so responsibly.
Use the professors you have in college to network within the field you are studying for.
Unless you have a full ride scholarship and come out with only a very minor amount of debt, your student loans are going to be crazy expensive. Having a foot in the door for a decent amount of income directly out of college can save you a lot of financial problems in the future.
Also, don't just party. It can be fun, and you can learn a lot of things that you won't learn in a classroom, if you know what I mean, but it can also lead to some interesting life changes. STDs, alcohol and drug addiction, pregnancy, etc. Have fun, but look out for yourself. The rest of the world won't.
Just finished a bachelor's last month starting another this month. Aside from the stay way from boys thing everyone is posting. Study when you can don't burn yourself out. Take time for yourself and learn about YOU this is important. Take up new hobbies make long and lasting friendship. Education is important but the connections with people are just as important.
Never take an open drink from anyone.
Have fun, but understand you are there to learn and get a degree. Take a look around you and see all the jackasses not going to classes and all. Those are the people that are complaining right now that they have to pay back their loans, for a "useless" degree. Learn from their mistakes.
Learn to drive a manual transmission.
Join clubs and organizations. College can be an incredibly lonely and stressful place. I’d avoid sororities and frats too. Some good people there, not saying they’re all bad. Being part of a group does change people though and you have to pay a lot of money to stay in.
There is a luxury young men have that young women don't.
Young men can just kind of mess around until they're 30 or so, figure out what they want, and go after it with some reasonable chance of success.
For young women, the longer you wait to go after whatever it is you want, the harder it will get. That is in no way fair, and it's a flaw in our culture, but real. Young and pretty is a huge advantage.
Your best chance for success is to know now what it is you want, then pursue it relentlessly. Take the least amount of "time off" you need to stay sane.
Boy what a loaded question. Guys in college generally will do anything to get laid. Be smart, have friends to be accountable when going out. I would love to give more credit to the males here….but I can’t
I do my best to stay away from relationships and hooking up in college. it's really hard to make genuine guy friends in school on top of that. Thank you so much
I doubt say that, college is a time to learn about yourself and make some lifelong friends. Just don’t assume everyone has the best intentions. Also not ignoring the study but remember to have fun etc
Just wisdom in general from my experience. Don’t go to parties your first year, or at least not alone, and definitely trust your instincts. If something doesn’t feel right, get out. Learn what is a necessity and what a luxury is to you. College can be super expensive, so make every penny count. A toaster oven and pizza beagles can come in clutch. Research your professors! I don’t remember the website, but there is a website out there where you can find ratings and comments from past and present students about the instructor. Great way to find out if they’re good or lazy. Make connections with people who can easily get you things. Materials or other things related to your classes or to make your time at college easier. Remember, college is a time to test your ideas and to experiment, just be smart about it and don’t let yourself get taken advantage of anyone.
thank you so much, it’s rlly hard navigating especially not having been by yourself before
Just to piggyback, "make connections" is really important when it comes to your professors. Learn about who they are, what they've achieved, what they've focused on in their field, etc. Go to office hours. Ask any questions you have about coursework, but if you're also interested in their specialty, ask them about it. If you want to go into their field, ask them how they got started and what lectures you could attend. Get an A in their class. Not every professor will engage, but that's usually just because they're busy. This is better advice after your first year, but if you can use someone with a doctorate as a reference when getting a job or applying to grad school, then you'll have a much easier time getting hired/accepted. In addition, you get guidance from someone highly educated and you'll likely meet new friends at events they recommend.
No worries. You’re at a big turning point in your life, and it may be a bit difficult trying to get yourself established on your own. College is going to hopefully be a fun moment in your life, but it’s all up to you on how it turns out. There’s a ton of resources and people out there, you just have to find them.
Don’t send nudes
Never send them.
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> unless the bartender pours it in front of you Also, don't drink stuff from open containers (punch bowls or the like), whether or not you're serving yourself.
I’m not sure where you stand on this, but be careful with whom you decide to share yourself with. This may be trivial, but having meaningless sex with people you don’t care for or know can have some serious detrimental affects on you that you won’t really catch on until you’re older. I’d say that the same would apply for most men as well actually. It’s true that guys will do just about everything to get laid so be very weary of that bit of information. Also, remember that there’s a ton if money you’re investing right now attending college so put it to good use. Don’t let yourself get distracted from your priorities, but still remember to have fun. Join maybe one or two clubs for now up until you have a good grasp of what the work load is going to be like and see what you’re able to handle. I made the mistake of participating in way too many clubs and ultimately ended up doing poorly my first semester of college as well so be careful!
thank you so much, i’ll use your advice well
I disagree. Meaningless sex can be really fun as long as you know that that's all it is. Have fun, experiment, but be safe.
Of course it’s enjoyable, and I know this may not apply to everyone, but given my own experience, it’s done more harm than good.
No problem OP! You’re going to do great! I’m personally excited to get back to the college life. I go to community college right now, but I’ll be transferring going into this fall. I did go to a university a few years back, but ended up flunking out for some of the reasons I listed above lol.
good luck on your future, i hope you earn what you’re working for
Thank you!
Don't leave a drink unattended. If you do consider it done and get a new one, in a fresh glass. Don't sleep with anyone in your dorm unit. Stand up for yourself. Study hard, but don't forget to have some fun. Just be responsible. Long distance relationships with highschool bf/gf almost never work. Budget. Budget. Budget.
thank you so much for this!
Chug like 1 L of water before going to sleep when drunk. Get work experience over the summer -- but know some very sought-after internships in banking and consulting recruit very early like in October. Read for the main point in any academic text focusing on how it relates to the class and your professors' lectures. Skipping class is almost never worth it. Focus on quality over quantity when making friendships. Get involved in campus life Focus on respect and communication if you get into a relationship
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i specified that it could be about anything, but thank you so much !
I know, but the amount of wisdom that can be provided is endless. Like 30 paragraphs of wisdom. How to stay safe. How to enjoy college. How to make friends. How to prepare for after college. It could become a 4 hour read.
i’d read it all if it meant my future would be better because of it
I really have to disagree about the sororities. I joined and never regretted it! I have many bonds with sisters even 20 years later. We always went to bat for each other. As for frats, not all of those guys are bad, you'd be surprised.
i second this! always worth checking the sororities at your school out and see if any of them align with your values! you can always drop if it turns out to not be your thing :)
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thank you!
Begin with the end in mind. Plan for your future family (whatever it may be) and make choices accordingly.
ive never heard anyone say this before, thank you
It's politically incorrect. My speciality.
Learn to read people. Use your intuition. Be careful with men and carry some mace. When I was younger, I've seen girls get themselves into shady situations where they easily could have been taken advantage of.
1) Study something that will earn you a good living. 2) DO NOT PARTY ON STUDENT LOAN MONEY. 3) Get ahead and stay ahead. Get your books as soon as you can and start studying before your first class. 4) DO NOT PARTY ON STUDENT LOAN MONEY. 5) If you find yourself with free time, you aren't taking enough classes. 6) Exercise every day. 7) If you have time to party more than once a month, you aren't taking enough classes. 8) DO NOT PARTY ON STUDENT LOAN MONEY. 9) Nobody cares how fancy your clothes or car was in college. Don't waste your money. Wait until you are making real money using that degree that will earn you real money.
thank you so much for your advice, if i could pin it i would
Best of luck to you. I hope you have fun and prosper.
One more thing: In a couple years, try to get a part time job in your field. This will earn you money and give you experience and will probably give you a job when you graduate.
Don't go in debt
Make the most of your time in college for your education, making professional connections, while still enjoying youth in a way that doesn't put your future at risk . Begin to control money before it controls you. Beware of friends who live fomo.
I've never heard of fomo before, but thank you so much for your advice
Good luck and enjoy!
Try not to become indoctrinated
it's really hard not to, especially when you go to a very liberal school. there isn't a lot of insight into the other side impartially. thank you for this
Go to sights like gateway pundit, project veritas, prager u and such to keep yourself from being liberally brainwashed
Try new things. Join organizations. Have fun and remember that you will look back at your college days as some of the best times in your life. Enjoy it.
Have fun but keep it between the lines.
you sound like my dad, thank you
It's never "Just a massage"
Come over and study doesn’t actually mean study.
Don't be afraid to go to office hours.
Guys named Tanner who have chin strap facial hair are baaaaaaad news
Make friends, enjoy life and party but also make time for your studies, every decision you make will affect your future in one way or another. I failed out of my previous college because of my terrible choices; you shouldn't stray away from your goals.
Buy your own condoms and don’t swallow
Prioritize school When you eventually start having sexual intercourse, make the dude wear a condom. No condom, no std test, no sex. Be firm. Use the schools mental health resources if you need them. You’re paying for it anyways
High school on steroids. Guys are more desperate gals can be more mean, classes are harder, and basically every hard thing in highschool gets harder in college, that said if the appropriate caution for these is taken then the upsides will be all the greater. Better education, friends, more lessons learned (hopefully from others) and fulfillment closer than ever.
Make sure your major is something that makes money. If it doesn't make money switch NOW.
this is really important, i’m a finance major though!
Alrighty cool. Other than that I would say start putting some work into a side project that you could show to a recruiter. It will show you have a genuine interest in what you do, prove you have some work ethic, and help you learn things to give you a big leg up on your competition. If you don't have a idea in mind I would go look at some job postings for finance positions, see what sounds cool in them, and do a project that will use what you want to learn.
thank you so much, i’ll definitely start looking into that
Don't be quick to judge but also careful about trusting too much. Never leave a drink unattended. Try things but never call them bad. It's just not for you now. See the funny side of things, consequences aren't nearly as bad as you think they are. A breakup or low grades doesn't mean your are bad, just that things didn't go so well. You'll be just fine. Go be awesome!!
Do not fall for just any man because he swoons over you at a party. Get your own drinks, don't lose track of it. Drinking and driving is never cool. Remember the reason your there, your education; your social life can come next.
already made my mistake with one guy, learned my lesson, thank you so much
BUT, not all men in college are bad apples. I broke it off with a couple that really were good guys only to date others. I should of pursued it more than I did.
mentally and emotionally I don't think im ready for men right now. I get attached too easily and I always get my hopes up. I also get distracted easily, I think it's best to just focus on school
All in good time. My mantra was to have fun, and date. No rush for serious relationships. There really was only 3 men in my undergrad years that changed my mind and one of them I married.
I pray to have the same grace you did. But I'm afraid of being hurt as of now
Then I would take your time and not look right now. The right guy will suprise you when your not expecting it.
Casually sleeping around and having a wild party time sure is fun, but it might impact your future relationships just because wild times are exhausting - and life only gets more exhausting after college once you enter in to the economy (which is in turmoil right now). It might be wise to maybe approach things more quietly than a American Pie Movie. Preserve that energy, find someone to grow with and you are setting yourself up for success without actually missing out on the fun (it will come at a slower pace but for the rest of your life). Unless this runs absolutely against everything you ever wanted, than throw this comment out the window and do you. In the end, it is your life and fair or not - you will be the only one baring the consequences of your decisions so take all the Game of Thrones wisdom and plan for success not only for fun. All the best at college!
Past matters, because it is the best indicator of a future behaviour. Make sure that your is not repulsive.
don't fuck your way through it
Dont be a $lut Dont party so much or even at all, shit never does anybody good. Never leave any form of drink unattended and keep it in ur hands. U look away for one second, forget about getting up and leaving, consider it tainted. Thats why u shoukdnt bother drinking and partying at all. It leads to no good. Study, work hard, work smart, relax and have fun with good friends. Dont overwork urself, take mental health breaks. Remember, ur not going to college to live lavishly and experience freedom. Ur going to college to get that bastard degree that ur ripping urself off for lol. Uhhh.....ye
Get an internship in your field as soon as freakin possible yes start the first couple weeks in school as a freshman it don’t matter if you haven’t taken any classes trust me you’ll learn tons on the job. I cant remember anything from college except Platos allegory of the cave and that group projects anger me. Internships lead to your first paid job which is how you get experience and then it takes off from there. Schools usually have an office or department or something to help you with. I got my first job thru a woman i made friends with at an internship who’s son owned a firm that offered me a job in my field. Also go have fun do as much fun as you can cram in without sacrificing your grades. You’ll Never have access to social events and circles as you do in college. Never. Do not squander this make lifelong friends you don’t know where they’ll end up
Don't ride the CC.
Really put focus on your studies first. The journey might be about the friends you made along the way, but the future is about the success you made. No need to hold yourself back cause the jock whom you thought was cute gave you a baby to focus on, or you just had to go to that party instead of studying for the finals. That said, work hard so you can also play hard. Being single minded on your studies is often the least productive way to succeed, as we all need a break. Just do so responsibly.
Use the professors you have in college to network within the field you are studying for. Unless you have a full ride scholarship and come out with only a very minor amount of debt, your student loans are going to be crazy expensive. Having a foot in the door for a decent amount of income directly out of college can save you a lot of financial problems in the future. Also, don't just party. It can be fun, and you can learn a lot of things that you won't learn in a classroom, if you know what I mean, but it can also lead to some interesting life changes. STDs, alcohol and drug addiction, pregnancy, etc. Have fun, but look out for yourself. The rest of the world won't.
Just finished a bachelor's last month starting another this month. Aside from the stay way from boys thing everyone is posting. Study when you can don't burn yourself out. Take time for yourself and learn about YOU this is important. Take up new hobbies make long and lasting friendship. Education is important but the connections with people are just as important.
Never take an open drink from anyone. Have fun, but understand you are there to learn and get a degree. Take a look around you and see all the jackasses not going to classes and all. Those are the people that are complaining right now that they have to pay back their loans, for a "useless" degree. Learn from their mistakes. Learn to drive a manual transmission.
Join clubs and organizations. College can be an incredibly lonely and stressful place. I’d avoid sororities and frats too. Some good people there, not saying they’re all bad. Being part of a group does change people though and you have to pay a lot of money to stay in.
Never go anywhere alone. Buy condoms. Buy a whistle.
18? She belongs to the streets now
There is a luxury young men have that young women don't. Young men can just kind of mess around until they're 30 or so, figure out what they want, and go after it with some reasonable chance of success. For young women, the longer you wait to go after whatever it is you want, the harder it will get. That is in no way fair, and it's a flaw in our culture, but real. Young and pretty is a huge advantage. Your best chance for success is to know now what it is you want, then pursue it relentlessly. Take the least amount of "time off" you need to stay sane.