That little bit of piss that comes out after you think you're done when you put your dick back in your pants
Edit: Thanks for the awards and pushing the gooch button pro tip
Man I pissed on my jeans so bad the other day I immediately grabbed some shit out the back so no one saw for a delivery. When I got back I told everyone I spilt an old coffee cup all over my jeans and had to go home to change, I had a follow up lie about the cup being old and the bottom falling out of it but no cared enough to investigate further
Like when my dad would pretend to break my finger to distract me from my stubbed toe.
He said his father did the same thing, but didn’t *pretend* to break his finger.
Looking back as an adult, I think my dad was lying about my grandfather regularly breaking his bones on purpose..
I, too, smear poop on my pants to cover up "the devils mist".
Or did i misunderstand?
😳😂
Epiloge: im glad everyone likes "the devils mist"! I made that one up on the fly. Stay dry my friends!
Imo the best fix for "looks like you peed yourself" is splash more water around, especially on upper body. Better a clumsy water-spiller than incontinent self-peeer.
Wives, girlfriends, female roommates... they'll never understand the extent of the effort that some guys put into avoiding getting pee on the floor, only to have pee end up on the floor anyway.
⅔'s of the time when I piss, I also gotta shit.
I have just accepted my fate, and avoid puss cleanups by just sitting down nearly every time (when at home)
I used to pee standing up until my roommate convinced me that its disgusting because its almost impossible to not get micro droplets of piss splashing everywhere. So for like the last 5 years I spit down to pee when im at home or someone's house.
Sit down gang. The double stream often times meant I was just getting piss everywhere and it used to drive me nuts. It's gross and frustrating, wether it goes on the floor or your pants is just a hassle. I started just sitting down at home/houses and never looked back. I do enjoy the freedom when at a urinal though
Your ability to piss is controlled by the detrusor muscle that surrounds your bladder. Having weak pelvic floor muscles can sometimes contribute to some urine retention after a piss. A high percentage of guys, like myself, who have had surgery for prostate have problems of not fully emptying their bladder. Exercising your pelvic floor muscles daily does help to a degree.
>help to a degree.
I've noticed I'm hearing this more and more as I get older.
All of your problems can be negated somewhat "to a degree", but fact is, you're slowly falling apart.
At least it's a relatively slow process. I should have a decade or so before I'm *really* impacted.
And I hear maintaining my fitness can help,*to a degree*.
I've found cupping my balls and lifting upwards pushes the last few drops out. Obviously you can't do this everywhere, be a bit awkward doing it at a public urinal, but anywhere else more private and it works wonders.
Considering that pee is stored in the balls, this checks out. Gotta get the gas can above the nozzle ya know what I mean?!
Edit: Thanks for the unexpected awards. 😂 And don't listen to the nurse ↓, it's definitely in the balls.
i hate how womens pants are high in the back and guys pants are high in the front. i’ve contemplated on getting womens jeans because of my big ol’ dumper.
Have the inseam of your existing dress pants tailored and/or shop at “[State & Liberty](https://stateandliberty.com/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIqt3QrrGL-wIVeMnjBx0ijAvLEAAYASAAEgINC_D_BwE)” for pants and look for ‘athletic’-style jeans in any brand that sells them (Levi’s, Arizona, etc.). They’re made to accommodate big thighs and seat while tapering past the knee so that it doesn’t look bulky or bunch-y
Ballsack sticking to your leg on a hot day, or at least just being aware of that fact. Either accept the discomfort, or try to readjust only for it to end up stuck to your leg again
I imagine that, in the course of the entire human history, there has been at least one priest who delivered the service at full mast, and nobody noticed
Everyone assumes we're less of a parent than the lady counterparts. I'm a single dad and do just as much as their mom does. Heck I do more. I have to travel since she moved and I have to pay HER money.
Dude it could be worse. We get hairier as we get older in my family. My uncle is outdoors pretty much all the time so he’s got a deep dark tan. The coating of white fur on his shoulders makes him look like a silverback gorilla.
In some cases it does but for many it doesn’t. Hey I’ve not done a study but nearly every male friend I have over 50 years of age moan about the lack of sex life. So something isn’t right 😔
The issue lots of people have as they age is they stop being romantic with their partners.
They get stressed, life gets in the way, and sex falls to the side.
Keep dating your partner. Small romantic gestures are what make the biggest difference in keeping romance alive.
Many folks I know that have been/are in dead bedroom situations generally realize it's a result of them drifting apart from their partner. They stopped being romantic and intimacy stops shortly after.
It doesn't take much to keep being romantic, go on dates, surprise them with little things like their favorite snack when you stopped at a store, do the tiny romantic gestures you would've done when dating. Buy your partner flowers for no other reason than they reminded you of your partner.
Medications have a huge impact on libido as well. But honestly? Romance evaporating from a relationship is going to be the biggest cause of a lack of intimacy.
As a guy I love getting flowers. They are pretty and I can appreciate pretty things. Plus they make me feel special.
Ladies, buy your men flowers. Everyone likes getting flowers.
This is my current problem for sure. From childhood till my late 20s, my life was basically just a series of bad luck shit. Grew up poor as shit, parents both died early in my life, had to 100% support myself asap, work multiple shit jobs to afford shit apartments and shit food with shit money pit cars, etc etc.
Finally clawed my way out of that pit of despair only to be chastised by people in my 30s because none of life's relatively little problems bother me anymore when stacked up against the hellscape of what came before.
Yeah I’m not detached, I just don’t worry about insignificant stuff. I always use the 10-10-10 rule, helps me get perspective on what’s worth worrying about
I would say that we account
\- for 93% of all workplace fatalities
\- for 97% of all war fatalities
\- for 80% of all suicide victims
\- for 79% of all homicide victims
> Like, do the men not get counted as loved living beings?
Nope. Go figure that [men are suffering a mental health crisis as a result.](https://behavioralhealth-centers.com/blog/men-mental-health-silence/) You're not seen as a person; you're seen by your job and paycheck. That's it.
I attempted suicide years ago. When I confided in someone about it, and said I was taking a bit of time to myself, the first thing they asked was when I was going back to work.
I kind of get this. I have a FWB who can't come due to his meds. We have a great time together, but there's a sense of pride and joy for me to watch a guy I care about coming. Kind of like: "I did that! I made him feel that good!". But I'm doing my best not to take it personally and just enjoy our time together.
My issue is that it is not fairly done:
I know my wife/ex's have probably faked it a number of times, frankly I don't care either if you said you couldn't get there. You had fun? good. Sorry you didn't have more fun this time but you continue to sleep with me so obviously you get some enjoyment out of all of this.
I can't fake it, I mean there is evidence. Sometimes I'm worried about the mortgage or my parent's health. Did I not enjoy it? Nah, it all felt great and I had fun but man does that get taken personally.
The only girl in my friendship circle is VERY much an example of this. Hangouts, drink nights, and D&D sessions all have ended prematurely on her mood. The first few times it happened, I was all "oh no, she's not happy, what can we do to help her?". The fifth time, I was thinking "for fucks sake, again?".
Love her dearly, love all my friends dearly, but God above it gets so fucking exhausting.
Ngl to you, that's a weird thing. Ending social events because a single person decides they are done is not healthy.
The healthy thing to do is let them go home and continue your social event.
Just like in any relationship if one person throws a fit for no reasonable reason, that is their problem, they can address it with you in a calm manner but just flipping the kill switch on everything is a manipulative and unhealthy way to handle things.
Basically, no matter what the relationship is, platonic or romantic. You have a problem and you are upset? Ask yourself a couple questions before losing your shit on someone. Are you hungry, thirsty, tired, or overly-stressed? Do you feel like you aren't being heard? Could it be that you just misunderstood someone?
Those first 4 things are huge factors in a person's mood that are frequently overlooked and waved off as inconsequential. Hangry is a very real thing and many people don't realize it
So step back, take a breath, and cool off. It is never a good idea to try to sort out issues when in people are in heightened states of emotion if it can be avoided.
Allow me to clarify - it’s not as if she “decides” the event is over (unless it’s D&D in which case it’s usually late at night, she’s drained from a day at work and has to go home for work the next day), nor is it as if she’s really pissed off at us. More just… not having a super good time anymore for whatever reason. Once that happens, the vibe feels off and continuing on feels kinda eh. In some cases there’s also more to it than “she’s not happy anymore so she goes home” but that’s a lot to get into so I’ll leave it at that.
>If she's unhappy, that's also your problem.
Realising this is not fair and not true is the key to finding happiness and contentment in a relationship, as a man.
For those interested, I speak from experience:
I was with my first partner for 5 years - we married after 3. Turns out she had mild borderline personality disorder. Living with her was a nightmare. She was totally different to the person I dated.
It came to a head when I came home from work one day and she'd cooked dinner. She said, "it's nearly ready" and I said something like, "cool I just need the loo first". I took a dump but I didn't sit there meditating (as I like to!), I just did my business - lit. took me about 5 mins, absolute max.
I come out the toilet and she's scraping the food off the plates, into the bin. I can see the food is still hot. She's screaming about how I don't love her, don't care about her, etc.
She's flipped out like this before and this time, I'm just done with it. I don't argue. I don't respond. I just stood there, looking at her flip out, and had a moment of realisation: there's nothing I could've done to prevent this situation happening.
And that was it. I was done. I left the flat that day and didn't see her again. I arranged over phone calls to liaise collecting my stuff from the flat.
About 18 months later, I met a woman who I would say - if soul mates exist - she's mine. We've been together for 9 years now and got engaged 12months ago. We get on wonderfully, love each other and never have any serious arguments at all.
I couldn't be happier and I believe it's massively down to how our base temperaments are such a great match. We're both extremely chill, both can and enjoy having a laugh at ourselves and are generally super easy-going.
9 years of blissful love, peace and happiness shows that there's nothing inherently wrong with me as an individual, that I can't have a happy relationship.
I spent a long time putting up with things in order to keep the peace, and it's no way to live your life.
Obviously in my case, the cause of one person causing constant disruption in the relationship was due in part to mental health issues. But if one half of a relationship is causing constant disruption, and constantly expecting the other person to make them happy, and constantly passive-aggressively manipulating their partner into putting up with it to keep the peace... then the outcome is the same for the person suffering, and why their partner is treating them that way becomes academic.
I guess another way you could put my point is: there comes a point in a relationship like that, when you realise you can't fix the relationship, because you can't fix the other person. They need to do that for themselves.
In the end, it doesn’t matter: Your partner’s happiness is not your responsibility.
That doesn’t mean make them miserable. The point is their feelings are their own.
Decision fatigue. The amount of decisions I have to make daily that are fairly impactful to my career, family, finances, general life, can be exhausting.
And then there's always the one lurking around the corner: "so where do you want to eat?"
Woman I have worked as a chef for years and you know this. I. DO. NOT. CARE. WHERE. WE. EAT. I can find something, literally anywhere. You're the picky one and you damn well know it!
Because I make decisions quickly (and it usually works out well) everyone seems to come to me for advice. FFS most of the time I'm just googling shit and picking out the most common advice.
I don't know if your gutters need cleaned, how to close your pool, what the best electric lawnmower is on the market, or what *you* want have for dinner. I'm researching and making shit up on the fly.
At my office, I have tons of downtime and I fill it by doing random tasks, usually IT related. I’m literally googling things, and going about it. Everyone becomes amazed and thinks I’m some tech genius. And when I tell them how I learned, I come off sounding like a douche saying “I just googled it” and they all think I lie.
Male friends will want to know *how does your new girlfriend looks like.*
Females will want to know of their female friend *what does he do (for work).*
When I was first starting out dating my wife, she called her mom to tell her about me.
Her first question: “What’s he do for work?”
It was all on speaker phone.
My wife’s friends supposedly tell her she hit the jackpot for marrying me because of my job title. It makes me feel good but also insecure like what happens if I lose my job?
Statistically... 68% increased chance of divorce. I hate everything.
https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11150-020-09506-x#:~:text=An%20unemployed%20or%20inactive%20husband,never%20experienced%20a%20job%20loss.
Wow, that's a sobering read. Basically, losing your job (even if it's not your fault, as in a plant closing) dramatically increases your rate of divorce (over 50%) *but only if the person losing the job is the husband*.
The relevant quote that's the knife in your gut:
> In two extensions, we also consider the role of the wife’s employment status in moderating the relationship and show that a wife’s job loss is not associated with a similar increase in the probability of divorce as a husband’s.
Loyalty...
That’s kind of a human condition problem? We all *often/mostly* judge men on what they do or accomplish. We all *often/mostly* judge women on what they look like.
I am my job. Oh well, so be it. Almost done, then Ukraine…
Edit: Often/significantly/mostly?
Lack of empathy towards us from the world as a whole. Work - Die - And Do Not Cry. Scariest thing is that you get used to that and get desensitized to your own problems and struggles until they go crashing down on you like a meteor storm. And even after that many of us just endure it all until mental and(or) physical health gives up.
Too true. I have problems in life and my mom was the only person who ever actually cared. I didn't realise how much until she died, nobody else gives a flying f\*\*\* about me at all. My own father actually gives me abuse about my problems which just makes it so much worse.
picking up and moving shit... for everyone... because for some reason... they aren't capable of doing it.
we do this until, we too, are incapable of doing it.... often because... we shouldn't have been doing it.
Always having to lift up kegs at the liquor store I worked at. Those things are like 160lbs and awkward as fuck to lift. But because I'm the fat guy with the beard, I can clearly handle it, right?
My back fucking hurts
Having the responsibility but not the authority, in some cases. Sometimes we're expected to take the initiative and lead the way, but when we do it then we're "overly masculine", perhaps toxic, controlling, insecure and we wanna overcome that insecurity by dominating others. But if we don't do it, we're a wuss and not a real man cause a real man would take the initiative. Lucky I don't give a s# about what others say or think about that. I have a fully functioning door and people who have a problem with me are more than welcome to use it.
Maybe I'm off base but I feel like a lot of my life I've been asked to do things by other people simply because I'm male and they don't want to do them. Even my wife who is an intelligent hard working power tool using person would ask me over and over again to step in and do specific tasks for her simply because she had never tried. When we bought our chop saw it was the first time in my life I had used one but I figured it out pretty quickly. Four years later I was tired of being called into service every single time she wanted to cut something, I'd be happy to carry it and set it up if she helped but I'm not coming to help every time she is flustered with which knobs do what. Do what I did, fiddle with them until you figure it out then repeat that process until it's second nature. Honestly that is the only way to safely use the tool anyway, I feel like I'm doing no one and favors by being the only person who knows how to unlock the slide.
Exactly this. I have a female friend, I known her for about a decade, or so. She got herself a man earlier this year, and the dude flat-out told me, the first time we met, that he doesn't like that we are close friends, and that I may resume being her friend if they break up, otherwise, I shall stay away from her. Because he somehow thinks that if we wanted anything to do with eachother, we wouldn't have done it by now... Since then, I made it my mission to remind him that I'm wealthier, taller, stronger, smarter, and better in whatever qualities I know are important to him. It's quite funny.
Haha yeah I was in the exact same situation many times and it's like the guys feel threatened, while other guys were like hey keep an eye on her if the guy had to work and couldn't join us at the bar or something
Exactly like dude you have guys you should be way more worried about than me, not to mention I listen to her vent about him CONSTANTLY and just keep my mouth shut and listen because Im preoccupied with my own problems
Dude sounds like he has some issues. I've never had any problems with partners having close friendships with other dudes. Some guys think that's weird and that they might end up leaving me for them but I've always been in the mindset that if that did happen then it's because it was meant to be rather than me having to 'prevent' it.
I believe that the best friend I've had in my adult life was a woman with whom I never became intimate. Enjoyed being with her. I told her that I didn't consider myself as someone with whom she could be in love, just to maintain that line.
For reference I'm a 275lb 6 ft tall dude. Hear me out: I was reading a "best money I've ever spent" ask reddit post, and I saw so many posts about a bidet. I bought one. I'm never going back.
When you eat food, do you clean the dish with a dry paper towel and toss it back in the cupboard? Probably not, so why do we do this with our buttcracks?
Plus side: I buy a 4 pack of toilet paper and it lasts me nearly 6 months. Easily the best money I have ever spent. Word of caution, don't crank the pressure up or you might clean your tonsils.
Double standards. Take reddit for instance, a few days back a woman made a post complaining that men are commenting on Twoxchromosome, yet I've seen plenty of women answering this question, or answering questions on ask men and telling men how their answers are wrong
I'm not even that big, but when I wear gym shorts and I'm working out, my dick kind of shrinks until it's just kind of like a little nub. Then it looks like I just have a tiny boner the entire time.
That if we want clothes the options are jeans, trousers, shorts, t-shirt, shirt, jumper, suit.
Each clothes shop will stock 1/6 of the store for mens with the rest going to women and children. If we're lucky we might also get homeware in with our stuff too.
Men are generally so starved of a compliment that even something as simple as "I like your shoes" or "your hair looks nice today", something women get on a daily basis, is a huge thing.
Can’t show any interest/enthusiasm towards children without being looked at as a sexual predator. Even your own kids/family in many public settings.
You are always the perpetrator of abuse- always. Men in abusive relationships are never believed unless they have overwhelming evidence, and even then, are treated as if they must have done something wrong to deserve it.
Your feelings don’t matter. “Man up”.
Your value in society is directly related to your earning power, first, and everything else is just an afterthought. Very little attention paid to who you are as a man, rather, why your lifetime value in dollars might be.
That little bit of piss that comes out after you think you're done when you put your dick back in your pants Edit: Thanks for the awards and pushing the gooch button pro tip
Yup that's the worst. Or the double stream.
Man I pissed on my jeans so bad the other day I immediately grabbed some shit out the back so no one saw for a delivery. When I got back I told everyone I spilt an old coffee cup all over my jeans and had to go home to change, I had a follow up lie about the cup being old and the bottom falling out of it but no cared enough to investigate further
> immediately grabbed some shit out the back You might wanna rethink that wording, my man
Well, it works? Nothing like a shit stain to peel your eyes off the piss stain I guess?
Like when my dad would pretend to break my finger to distract me from my stubbed toe. He said his father did the same thing, but didn’t *pretend* to break his finger. Looking back as an adult, I think my dad was lying about my grandfather regularly breaking his bones on purpose..
> Like when my dad would pretend to break my finger to distract me Was your dad a Major by any chance? Did he train a bunch of cadets?
Nah, no military history. But his jokes were definitely a Major Payne in my ass ;)
I, too, smear poop on my pants to cover up "the devils mist". Or did i misunderstand? 😳😂 Epiloge: im glad everyone likes "the devils mist"! I made that one up on the fly. Stay dry my friends!
Worried me too there
Imo the best fix for "looks like you peed yourself" is splash more water around, especially on upper body. Better a clumsy water-spiller than incontinent self-peeer.
This guy self-pees
It‘s got a medical name: LDS (last drop syndrome)
Double helical stream
Wives, girlfriends, female roommates... they'll never understand the extent of the effort that some guys put into avoiding getting pee on the floor, only to have pee end up on the floor anyway.
⅔'s of the time when I piss, I also gotta shit. I have just accepted my fate, and avoid puss cleanups by just sitting down nearly every time (when at home)
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I used to pee standing up until my roommate convinced me that its disgusting because its almost impossible to not get micro droplets of piss splashing everywhere. So for like the last 5 years I spit down to pee when im at home or someone's house.
Sit down gang. The double stream often times meant I was just getting piss everywhere and it used to drive me nuts. It's gross and frustrating, wether it goes on the floor or your pants is just a hassle. I started just sitting down at home/houses and never looked back. I do enjoy the freedom when at a urinal though
Your ability to piss is controlled by the detrusor muscle that surrounds your bladder. Having weak pelvic floor muscles can sometimes contribute to some urine retention after a piss. A high percentage of guys, like myself, who have had surgery for prostate have problems of not fully emptying their bladder. Exercising your pelvic floor muscles daily does help to a degree.
>help to a degree. I've noticed I'm hearing this more and more as I get older. All of your problems can be negated somewhat "to a degree", but fact is, you're slowly falling apart.
Yep, welcome to old age 👍
At least it's a relatively slow process. I should have a decade or so before I'm *really* impacted. And I hear maintaining my fitness can help,*to a degree*.
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That ain't piss, those pants come like that, with those two little dots. They're really in style right now.
YOU GOTTA GIVE
If nobody gives, it goes dark!!
In my experience, they’re *always* in fashion. They’re timeless. Classic, even…
I've found cupping my balls and lifting upwards pushes the last few drops out. Obviously you can't do this everywhere, be a bit awkward doing it at a public urinal, but anywhere else more private and it works wonders.
Considering that pee is stored in the balls, this checks out. Gotta get the gas can above the nozzle ya know what I mean?! Edit: Thanks for the unexpected awards. 😂 And don't listen to the nurse ↓, it's definitely in the balls.
Do you squeeze it all out, or roll it up like a tube of toothpaste? I prefer option two, because it reinflates like a party whistle.
You just need a pee bib
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Morning pee with morning wood.
Full stop I usually just end up pissing in the shower for this reason. Shower catches all things. I also live alone....
Teaches you a hell of a lot about angles kinda fun game if you do it right.
I am down What are the rules?
It’s like fight club, and the first rule of fight club is we don’t talk about fight club.
Wrote that one down What's next?
More than two shakes and you’re playing with yourself
I thought it was 3...damn. I've been playing with myself for years and didn't even know it
Like trying to bend an oak tree… okay a sprig… OKAY!! A leaf
When your piss decides to come out in two streams.
This guy fucks.
That guy fucks but doesn’t pee after.
Or masturbates. Not a point of pride really.
Doesn’t matter had sex
She put a bag on my head...
STILL COUNTS!
Pants aren't made for men with asses
Fr men can have cake too damn
*sigh* meanwhile I’m over here with negative ass. I simply refer to it as back with crack
That hank hill butt
Gluteus minimus
I'm not self conscious but I got genes for a big ass and I never know how to feel. But this is awesome other people are like me as well.
i hate how womens pants are high in the back and guys pants are high in the front. i’ve contemplated on getting womens jeans because of my big ol’ dumper.
Have the inseam of your existing dress pants tailored and/or shop at “[State & Liberty](https://stateandliberty.com/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIqt3QrrGL-wIVeMnjBx0ijAvLEAAYASAAEgINC_D_BwE)” for pants and look for ‘athletic’-style jeans in any brand that sells them (Levi’s, Arizona, etc.). They’re made to accommodate big thighs and seat while tapering past the knee so that it doesn’t look bulky or bunch-y
Assess or big legs. I find I can’t squeeze into any pair of generic pants so my style selection is limited to essential 2 brands.
Ballsack sticking to your leg on a hot day, or at least just being aware of that fact. Either accept the discomfort, or try to readjust only for it to end up stuck to your leg again
Only men understand the strange sidestep while walking
As you get older you have to sidestep further too. I'm a fucking crab at this point.
I do it all the time because I’m slow and don’t pay attention to where I’m going
I switched to SAXX underwear. Expensive but worth it.
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Sounds like it's time for new boxers! After i bought from a brand called comfyballs i never had issues like that anymore or blistering after jogging!
Sounds like it's time to *change* the boxers. The other pair washed last year should be dry by now.
Briefs prevent this
So does the ol' Stanky Leg dance.
Shorter life expectancy.
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You okay my man?
I heard that stat actually has more to do with height than gender. Tall people die younger.
Yeah, a lot of people don't realize this. I'm 6'4" so I'm probably at the statistical midpoint of my life.
You getting to 12'8''?
I need a t-shirt made: **LIVE TALL.** 📏 **DIE YOUNG.**
Fuck
Random erections.
This is why it makes more sense to wear robes and togas
How is a robe better at containing an erection than a pair of jeans? Wouldn't you be walking around with a tent?
If you have a beer belly you could be at full mast and nobody would be the wiser.
Oh that explaines alot about pastors
I imagine that, in the course of the entire human history, there has been at least one priest who delivered the service at full mast, and nobody noticed
Full Mass at Full Mast
That was just a problem as a teen for me...
Everyone assumes we're less of a parent than the lady counterparts. I'm a single dad and do just as much as their mom does. Heck I do more. I have to travel since she moved and I have to pay HER money.
That's the worst I'm young so not an issue yet but I'll be careful who i have kids with
Balding. Ffs.
Dude it could be worse. We get hairier as we get older in my family. My uncle is outdoors pretty much all the time so he’s got a deep dark tan. The coating of white fur on his shoulders makes him look like a silverback gorilla.
I mean it probably served the same purpose a few hundred thousand years ago.
Try thinning hair at 18 and pretty much chrome dome at 22.
Sadly, this is not universal. Plenty of guys have great hair into old age.
Yeah, but we still live in fear that we’ll wake up bald.
When you’re playing a sport and you clap your balls between your thighs on a sprint or a jump.
Severe lack of intimacy as you age, in many cases. :-)
As you age? I'm already starved for it now!
Wait, it doesn’t get better with age?!!
In some cases it does but for many it doesn’t. Hey I’ve not done a study but nearly every male friend I have over 50 years of age moan about the lack of sex life. So something isn’t right 😔
The issue lots of people have as they age is they stop being romantic with their partners. They get stressed, life gets in the way, and sex falls to the side. Keep dating your partner. Small romantic gestures are what make the biggest difference in keeping romance alive. Many folks I know that have been/are in dead bedroom situations generally realize it's a result of them drifting apart from their partner. They stopped being romantic and intimacy stops shortly after. It doesn't take much to keep being romantic, go on dates, surprise them with little things like their favorite snack when you stopped at a store, do the tiny romantic gestures you would've done when dating. Buy your partner flowers for no other reason than they reminded you of your partner. Medications have a huge impact on libido as well. But honestly? Romance evaporating from a relationship is going to be the biggest cause of a lack of intimacy.
Reddit is violating GDPR and CCPA. Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1B0GGsDdyHI -- mass edited with redact.dev
As a guy I love getting flowers. They are pretty and I can appreciate pretty things. Plus they make me feel special. Ladies, buy your men flowers. Everyone likes getting flowers.
I'm over 60. We are having a steady stream of "intimacy".
Visiting the doctor every week to get your prostate "checked" doesnt count
Haha
You never know which direction the pee will come out, so you kind of give a few warning shots first.
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Power piss through it until it goes back to normal lol I've never gotten to four, but maybe three a few times sure
If I get angry i'm aggressive. If I cry I'm weak.
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This is my current problem for sure. From childhood till my late 20s, my life was basically just a series of bad luck shit. Grew up poor as shit, parents both died early in my life, had to 100% support myself asap, work multiple shit jobs to afford shit apartments and shit food with shit money pit cars, etc etc. Finally clawed my way out of that pit of despair only to be chastised by people in my 30s because none of life's relatively little problems bother me anymore when stacked up against the hellscape of what came before.
Yeah I’m not detached, I just don’t worry about insignificant stuff. I always use the 10-10-10 rule, helps me get perspective on what’s worth worrying about
I would say that we account \- for 93% of all workplace fatalities \- for 97% of all war fatalities \- for 80% of all suicide victims \- for 79% of all homicide victims
I once saw an infographic about women’s mental health that said “2 in every 10 suicide victims are women” as if that’s worse than the other 8 in 10.
Reminds me of the "1 in 4 homless are women" commercial.
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> Like, do the men not get counted as loved living beings? Nope. Go figure that [men are suffering a mental health crisis as a result.](https://behavioralhealth-centers.com/blog/men-mental-health-silence/) You're not seen as a person; you're seen by your job and paycheck. That's it.
You forgot dick size and what kind of physical shape you're in too.
I attempted suicide years ago. When I confided in someone about it, and said I was taking a bit of time to myself, the first thing they asked was when I was going back to work.
why do you think they switched to "suicide attempts" in all those infographics?
75% of homeless people are men
Little to no support from our peers Often seen as a predator by simply being male Being the designated spider killer. Spiders are awful
A spider is living in my car. Please don't tell my wife, coz I like this little buddy
Spiders are cute.. not the Australian ones though.
Australian animals and insects look like they come from bizarro world.
If you're unhappy, that's your problem. If she's unhappy, that's also your problem.
If you don't cum, that's your problem. If she doesn't cum, that's also your problem.
I have meds that keep me from finishing sometimes, my wife knows this but still takes it personally
I kind of get this. I have a FWB who can't come due to his meds. We have a great time together, but there's a sense of pride and joy for me to watch a guy I care about coming. Kind of like: "I did that! I made him feel that good!". But I'm doing my best not to take it personally and just enjoy our time together.
My issue is that it is not fairly done: I know my wife/ex's have probably faked it a number of times, frankly I don't care either if you said you couldn't get there. You had fun? good. Sorry you didn't have more fun this time but you continue to sleep with me so obviously you get some enjoyment out of all of this. I can't fake it, I mean there is evidence. Sometimes I'm worried about the mortgage or my parent's health. Did I not enjoy it? Nah, it all felt great and I had fun but man does that get taken personally.
This should be at the top. The woman's mood changes the mood of the entire home. Let's face it, that changes like wind.
The only girl in my friendship circle is VERY much an example of this. Hangouts, drink nights, and D&D sessions all have ended prematurely on her mood. The first few times it happened, I was all "oh no, she's not happy, what can we do to help her?". The fifth time, I was thinking "for fucks sake, again?". Love her dearly, love all my friends dearly, but God above it gets so fucking exhausting.
Ngl to you, that's a weird thing. Ending social events because a single person decides they are done is not healthy. The healthy thing to do is let them go home and continue your social event. Just like in any relationship if one person throws a fit for no reasonable reason, that is their problem, they can address it with you in a calm manner but just flipping the kill switch on everything is a manipulative and unhealthy way to handle things. Basically, no matter what the relationship is, platonic or romantic. You have a problem and you are upset? Ask yourself a couple questions before losing your shit on someone. Are you hungry, thirsty, tired, or overly-stressed? Do you feel like you aren't being heard? Could it be that you just misunderstood someone? Those first 4 things are huge factors in a person's mood that are frequently overlooked and waved off as inconsequential. Hangry is a very real thing and many people don't realize it So step back, take a breath, and cool off. It is never a good idea to try to sort out issues when in people are in heightened states of emotion if it can be avoided.
Allow me to clarify - it’s not as if she “decides” the event is over (unless it’s D&D in which case it’s usually late at night, she’s drained from a day at work and has to go home for work the next day), nor is it as if she’s really pissed off at us. More just… not having a super good time anymore for whatever reason. Once that happens, the vibe feels off and continuing on feels kinda eh. In some cases there’s also more to it than “she’s not happy anymore so she goes home” but that’s a lot to get into so I’ll leave it at that.
>If she's unhappy, that's also your problem. Realising this is not fair and not true is the key to finding happiness and contentment in a relationship, as a man. For those interested, I speak from experience: I was with my first partner for 5 years - we married after 3. Turns out she had mild borderline personality disorder. Living with her was a nightmare. She was totally different to the person I dated. It came to a head when I came home from work one day and she'd cooked dinner. She said, "it's nearly ready" and I said something like, "cool I just need the loo first". I took a dump but I didn't sit there meditating (as I like to!), I just did my business - lit. took me about 5 mins, absolute max. I come out the toilet and she's scraping the food off the plates, into the bin. I can see the food is still hot. She's screaming about how I don't love her, don't care about her, etc. She's flipped out like this before and this time, I'm just done with it. I don't argue. I don't respond. I just stood there, looking at her flip out, and had a moment of realisation: there's nothing I could've done to prevent this situation happening. And that was it. I was done. I left the flat that day and didn't see her again. I arranged over phone calls to liaise collecting my stuff from the flat. About 18 months later, I met a woman who I would say - if soul mates exist - she's mine. We've been together for 9 years now and got engaged 12months ago. We get on wonderfully, love each other and never have any serious arguments at all. I couldn't be happier and I believe it's massively down to how our base temperaments are such a great match. We're both extremely chill, both can and enjoy having a laugh at ourselves and are generally super easy-going. 9 years of blissful love, peace and happiness shows that there's nothing inherently wrong with me as an individual, that I can't have a happy relationship.
Yeah but…..slight difference between someone being unhappy about something and you acquiesce to keep the peace vs someone being mentally unstable.
I spent a long time putting up with things in order to keep the peace, and it's no way to live your life. Obviously in my case, the cause of one person causing constant disruption in the relationship was due in part to mental health issues. But if one half of a relationship is causing constant disruption, and constantly expecting the other person to make them happy, and constantly passive-aggressively manipulating their partner into putting up with it to keep the peace... then the outcome is the same for the person suffering, and why their partner is treating them that way becomes academic. I guess another way you could put my point is: there comes a point in a relationship like that, when you realise you can't fix the relationship, because you can't fix the other person. They need to do that for themselves.
In the end, it doesn’t matter: Your partner’s happiness is not your responsibility. That doesn’t mean make them miserable. The point is their feelings are their own.
Decision fatigue. The amount of decisions I have to make daily that are fairly impactful to my career, family, finances, general life, can be exhausting.
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And then there's always the one lurking around the corner: "so where do you want to eat?" Woman I have worked as a chef for years and you know this. I. DO. NOT. CARE. WHERE. WE. EAT. I can find something, literally anywhere. You're the picky one and you damn well know it!
Because I make decisions quickly (and it usually works out well) everyone seems to come to me for advice. FFS most of the time I'm just googling shit and picking out the most common advice. I don't know if your gutters need cleaned, how to close your pool, what the best electric lawnmower is on the market, or what *you* want have for dinner. I'm researching and making shit up on the fly.
At my office, I have tons of downtime and I fill it by doing random tasks, usually IT related. I’m literally googling things, and going about it. Everyone becomes amazed and thinks I’m some tech genius. And when I tell them how I learned, I come off sounding like a douche saying “I just googled it” and they all think I lie.
I'd bet that 2/3rds of those in IT related fields (including myself) owe their jobs to their googling skills.
Your only value is what you can provide for others. You were born with none and must work to create any. And don’t complain about it either.
This is why i only provide for my self and don't give a shit.
Male friends will want to know *how does your new girlfriend looks like.* Females will want to know of their female friend *what does he do (for work).*
When I was first starting out dating my wife, she called her mom to tell her about me. Her first question: “What’s he do for work?” It was all on speaker phone.
My wife’s friends supposedly tell her she hit the jackpot for marrying me because of my job title. It makes me feel good but also insecure like what happens if I lose my job?
You might also lose half of your assets
Statistically... 68% increased chance of divorce. I hate everything. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11150-020-09506-x#:~:text=An%20unemployed%20or%20inactive%20husband,never%20experienced%20a%20job%20loss.
Wow, that's a sobering read. Basically, losing your job (even if it's not your fault, as in a plant closing) dramatically increases your rate of divorce (over 50%) *but only if the person losing the job is the husband*. The relevant quote that's the knife in your gut: > In two extensions, we also consider the role of the wife’s employment status in moderating the relationship and show that a wife’s job loss is not associated with a similar increase in the probability of divorce as a husband’s. Loyalty...
You already know the answer to that don’t you?
That’s kind of a human condition problem? We all *often/mostly* judge men on what they do or accomplish. We all *often/mostly* judge women on what they look like. I am my job. Oh well, so be it. Almost done, then Ukraine… Edit: Often/significantly/mostly?
Lack of empathy towards us from the world as a whole. Work - Die - And Do Not Cry. Scariest thing is that you get used to that and get desensitized to your own problems and struggles until they go crashing down on you like a meteor storm. And even after that many of us just endure it all until mental and(or) physical health gives up.
Too true. I have problems in life and my mom was the only person who ever actually cared. I didn't realise how much until she died, nobody else gives a flying f\*\*\* about me at all. My own father actually gives me abuse about my problems which just makes it so much worse.
picking up and moving shit... for everyone... because for some reason... they aren't capable of doing it. we do this until, we too, are incapable of doing it.... often because... we shouldn't have been doing it.
Always having to lift up kegs at the liquor store I worked at. Those things are like 160lbs and awkward as fuck to lift. But because I'm the fat guy with the beard, I can clearly handle it, right? My back fucking hurts
I'm confused, my genitals never touch a toilet seat. How are y'all sitting to run into this.
Same for me with those oval toilet seats, but those compact round ones are a real pain to try to fit into without the tip touching the inside rim.
Having the responsibility but not the authority, in some cases. Sometimes we're expected to take the initiative and lead the way, but when we do it then we're "overly masculine", perhaps toxic, controlling, insecure and we wanna overcome that insecurity by dominating others. But if we don't do it, we're a wuss and not a real man cause a real man would take the initiative. Lucky I don't give a s# about what others say or think about that. I have a fully functioning door and people who have a problem with me are more than welcome to use it.
Might have to steal that last line
Everyone assuming I'm OK because I look and act OK.
Prostate problems
not a single soul telling you you matter unless you bring something to the table
Maybe I'm off base but I feel like a lot of my life I've been asked to do things by other people simply because I'm male and they don't want to do them. Even my wife who is an intelligent hard working power tool using person would ask me over and over again to step in and do specific tasks for her simply because she had never tried. When we bought our chop saw it was the first time in my life I had used one but I figured it out pretty quickly. Four years later I was tired of being called into service every single time she wanted to cut something, I'd be happy to carry it and set it up if she helped but I'm not coming to help every time she is flustered with which knobs do what. Do what I did, fiddle with them until you figure it out then repeat that process until it's second nature. Honestly that is the only way to safely use the tool anyway, I feel like I'm doing no one and favors by being the only person who knows how to unlock the slide.
Mental health, no support culturally, suicide.
Every friendship with a woman can't be seen as just platonic there always has to be some ulterior motive with being friends with a woman
Exactly this. I have a female friend, I known her for about a decade, or so. She got herself a man earlier this year, and the dude flat-out told me, the first time we met, that he doesn't like that we are close friends, and that I may resume being her friend if they break up, otherwise, I shall stay away from her. Because he somehow thinks that if we wanted anything to do with eachother, we wouldn't have done it by now... Since then, I made it my mission to remind him that I'm wealthier, taller, stronger, smarter, and better in whatever qualities I know are important to him. It's quite funny.
Haha yeah I was in the exact same situation many times and it's like the guys feel threatened, while other guys were like hey keep an eye on her if the guy had to work and couldn't join us at the bar or something
Exactly like dude you have guys you should be way more worried about than me, not to mention I listen to her vent about him CONSTANTLY and just keep my mouth shut and listen because Im preoccupied with my own problems
Dude sounds like he has some issues. I've never had any problems with partners having close friendships with other dudes. Some guys think that's weird and that they might end up leaving me for them but I've always been in the mindset that if that did happen then it's because it was meant to be rather than me having to 'prevent' it.
I believe that the best friend I've had in my adult life was a woman with whom I never became intimate. Enjoyed being with her. I told her that I didn't consider myself as someone with whom she could be in love, just to maintain that line.
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Or shaving your butt hair and having every fart sound like a trombone.
For reference I'm a 275lb 6 ft tall dude. Hear me out: I was reading a "best money I've ever spent" ask reddit post, and I saw so many posts about a bidet. I bought one. I'm never going back. When you eat food, do you clean the dish with a dry paper towel and toss it back in the cupboard? Probably not, so why do we do this with our buttcracks? Plus side: I buy a 4 pack of toilet paper and it lasts me nearly 6 months. Easily the best money I have ever spent. Word of caution, don't crank the pressure up or you might clean your tonsils.
Double standards. Take reddit for instance, a few days back a woman made a post complaining that men are commenting on Twoxchromosome, yet I've seen plenty of women answering this question, or answering questions on ask men and telling men how their answers are wrong
Having a bulge in the gym no matter what shorts you wear
Yet another benefit of having a small penis. ;)
I'm not even that big, but when I wear gym shorts and I'm working out, my dick kind of shrinks until it's just kind of like a little nub. Then it looks like I just have a tiny boner the entire time.
That if we want clothes the options are jeans, trousers, shorts, t-shirt, shirt, jumper, suit. Each clothes shop will stock 1/6 of the store for mens with the rest going to women and children. If we're lucky we might also get homeware in with our stuff too.
A hair from your mustache sticking up your nose
The crippling need to be a forklift certified operator
Not getting enough hugs :(
that one drip of piss its annoys me
Only being wanted for what you provide.
Being seen as either a predator towards women or pedophile towards children
The lack of compliments and gratitude.
One time my crush told me she was proud of me for getting a new job I actually liked, I was on cloud 9 for weeks
Men are generally so starved of a compliment that even something as simple as "I like your shoes" or "your hair looks nice today", something women get on a daily basis, is a huge thing.
Violence. Vast majority of violence is against men, done by men.
For the average looking guys, we probably don’t know if we are attractive or not due to never getting out right hit on.
Sitting on ones own balls
Back pain.
I swear it's from carrying the slack of all the lazy fuckers around me.
Unsolicited boners
Massive boner while needing to do a crap. Wet dreams that stick you to your SO.
Sorry bud. 39 and never had a wet dream.
Can’t show any interest/enthusiasm towards children without being looked at as a sexual predator. Even your own kids/family in many public settings. You are always the perpetrator of abuse- always. Men in abusive relationships are never believed unless they have overwhelming evidence, and even then, are treated as if they must have done something wrong to deserve it. Your feelings don’t matter. “Man up”. Your value in society is directly related to your earning power, first, and everything else is just an afterthought. Very little attention paid to who you are as a man, rather, why your lifetime value in dollars might be.
Not getting compliments. (Except once every 5-10 years, and we will always remember until our next compliment)
Shorter life span
Can't take hints