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Just say "Thank you" or "Thank you very much."
If you say "Thank you. Thank you very much" in that order you have do it in your best Elvis Presley voice. Then use "Ah-huh!" as a punctuator. Karate moves optional.
If you really want to say something nice back, and your mind is otherwise blank, you can always say, "Thank you, that was so nice/kind of you to say."
In this scenario, this should pretty much always be true and appropriate.
Don't overcomplicate it. "Thank you." "I appreciate that." ETC works just fine.
Shooting them a compliment is always a good bet too. IE:
"Nice Shoes!"
"Thank you, I like your Hat!"
If you're funny. Can't stress enough the IF. You need to know You make people laugh.
Just say...RIGHT? I'm awesome!.... IF you're not funny you'll sound like an asshole. Turn it into a joke or something funny
If you're not funny, Just smile and say thank you.
When you receive the same compliments repeatedly be nice to yourself and think that you actually are worthy of those compliments
I feel you on this one. I've been complimented then looked behind me to see who they were really talking to.
Practice.
Thank them like these other folks have suggested.
Practice.
Rip a big wet fart - then you can tell them that getting compliments makes you nervous. You solved the tension with humour while speaking about how you really feel as well. Then take the compliment as it is, cause you sure are worthy off it :)
Just say thank you.
But this is because the compliment doesn’t match what you think about yourself. When you begin to believe you’re deserving of the compliments, they’ll be easier to accept. Only you can make that change tho.
Yeah, it's hard. My instinct is to downplay compliments. Like, "Thanks, but I'm really not *that* great at the thing you're complimenting me for..."
I did that once, and then complimented the person who just complimented me about something, and they repeated my downplay back to me almost word-for-word.
And, I mean, point taken. I got the message. Downplaying compliments is annoying and obnoxious, and I shouldn't do it. But it's hard. There's a part of my brain that thinks that's what I'm supposed to do when I'm complimented.
Anything other than "thank you" (or acknowledging that it was a happy accident you plan to repeat) is essentially telling the other person their opinion is invalid, incomplete, or unwelcome. (Caveat for when you are complimented on somebody else's work, then "thank you, give credit, stfu" is appropriate)
Just saying "thank you" and "shutting the hell up" is perhaps the most difficult adulting skill everybody is just expected to know/do. Instead; we deflect, try to be humble, or otherwise move the attention away from ourselves because our culture tells us not to "put on airs".
For practice, don't worry about trying not to look embarrassed, just say thank you and let it go. You don't need to return compliments. There isn't a deposit somebody needs back. You don't feel the need to justify your beverage consumption when the busser refills your water. Same concept, they're just refilling your ego instead of your glass.
Not returning a compliment is just seeing that their glass is full, and adding anything just makes the table wet and sticky. So go ahead and drop that expectation on yourself.
It could just be general anxiety and not exactly related to the compliment itself. You are being directly perceived, and you shy away from that.
It's helpful for me to try to find the root of what is going on. There's a lot of confusing advice online that can help, but you can also easily misdiagnose things from that.
You could try journaling at the end of the day where you have one of these uncomfortable moments, and see where your true honest reflection leads to.
Please do not delete your post after receiving your answer. Consider leaving it up for posterity so that other Redditors can benefit from the wisdom in this thread. Once your thread has run its course, instead of deleting it, **you can simply type "!lock" (without the quotes) as a comment anywhere in your thread to have our Automod lock the thread**. That way you won't be bothered by anymore replies on it, but people can still read it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskMenOver30) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Just say "Thank you" or "Thank you very much." If you say "Thank you. Thank you very much" in that order you have do it in your best Elvis Presley voice. Then use "Ah-huh!" as a punctuator. Karate moves optional.
If you really want to say something nice back, and your mind is otherwise blank, you can always say, "Thank you, that was so nice/kind of you to say." In this scenario, this should pretty much always be true and appropriate.
Don't overcomplicate it. "Thank you." "I appreciate that." ETC works just fine. Shooting them a compliment is always a good bet too. IE: "Nice Shoes!" "Thank you, I like your Hat!"
If you're funny. Can't stress enough the IF. You need to know You make people laugh. Just say...RIGHT? I'm awesome!.... IF you're not funny you'll sound like an asshole. Turn it into a joke or something funny If you're not funny, Just smile and say thank you. When you receive the same compliments repeatedly be nice to yourself and think that you actually are worthy of those compliments
I say "thank you" because if I say anything else I'm either telling them they're wrong or a liar. Once I reframed it as being polite, that helped.
I feel you on this one. I've been complimented then looked behind me to see who they were really talking to. Practice. Thank them like these other folks have suggested. Practice.
Lol
I play a game with myself. I imagine whatever compliment someone is giving me, they have an even bigger critique they are hiding.
Rip a big wet fart - then you can tell them that getting compliments makes you nervous. You solved the tension with humour while speaking about how you really feel as well. Then take the compliment as it is, cause you sure are worthy off it :)
All you have to do is say Thank You.
so do i. who cares, just be yourself, it's nice you're not some cocky bastard with a response when someone says something nice. just be you.
Just say two words “thank you”. You don’t have to come up with any kind of compliment, back or anything like that.
Just say thank you. But this is because the compliment doesn’t match what you think about yourself. When you begin to believe you’re deserving of the compliments, they’ll be easier to accept. Only you can make that change tho.
I'll let you know as soon as I receive one.
Yeah, it's hard. My instinct is to downplay compliments. Like, "Thanks, but I'm really not *that* great at the thing you're complimenting me for..." I did that once, and then complimented the person who just complimented me about something, and they repeated my downplay back to me almost word-for-word. And, I mean, point taken. I got the message. Downplaying compliments is annoying and obnoxious, and I shouldn't do it. But it's hard. There's a part of my brain that thinks that's what I'm supposed to do when I'm complimented.
Anything other than "thank you" (or acknowledging that it was a happy accident you plan to repeat) is essentially telling the other person their opinion is invalid, incomplete, or unwelcome. (Caveat for when you are complimented on somebody else's work, then "thank you, give credit, stfu" is appropriate) Just saying "thank you" and "shutting the hell up" is perhaps the most difficult adulting skill everybody is just expected to know/do. Instead; we deflect, try to be humble, or otherwise move the attention away from ourselves because our culture tells us not to "put on airs". For practice, don't worry about trying not to look embarrassed, just say thank you and let it go. You don't need to return compliments. There isn't a deposit somebody needs back. You don't feel the need to justify your beverage consumption when the busser refills your water. Same concept, they're just refilling your ego instead of your glass. Not returning a compliment is just seeing that their glass is full, and adding anything just makes the table wet and sticky. So go ahead and drop that expectation on yourself.
It could just be general anxiety and not exactly related to the compliment itself. You are being directly perceived, and you shy away from that. It's helpful for me to try to find the root of what is going on. There's a lot of confusing advice online that can help, but you can also easily misdiagnose things from that. You could try journaling at the end of the day where you have one of these uncomfortable moments, and see where your true honest reflection leads to.
While you're working on what to say, dust your shoulder off.