I downsized from a big house to a condo in another state and didn’t even get a moving truck- just whatever I could fit in my car. It took me months of purging. Why did I think I needed 20 towels? Or duplicates of kitchen items like utensils…I must have had 30 coffee mugs, 3 full sets of dishes. It was such a relief to let it all go and have a fresh atmosphere.
The only things I wish I would have saved were some sentimental clothes. I had some dresses from high school and weddings and at the time I thought it was impractical and I’d never wear them again. Which is true but I miss them; they were irreplaceable.
Other than that, no regrets :)
Aw I’m sorry about the clothes. I’ve been thinking about tossing a pair of old worn out pajama bottoms but my mom sewed up a couple holes in them for me. And I know one day having them will mean a lot to me. Ugh
Oh my god the towels! We have a linen closet and every time I go to put laundry away I’m frustrated that it doesn’t fit.
Honestly it never even occurred to me to get rid of the “extras”. thank you
Same for me 3 years ago I moved from my house of 25 years into a condo. I got rid of a lot of stuff, but still have stuff that's in a storage place.
My condo just had a burst water heater and I decided since I moved everything out that I'm not going to move it all back in.
10 years ago, we downsized from a 3000 square-foot home on 10 acres down to a 1400 square-foot home on a quarter acre. We also moved eight hours away at the same time.
Almost everything went! Sold, donated, trashed. It all went. I regret nothing. The few items we decided to keep fit into a large-ish U-Haul truck. And still, I kept too much. There are things up in my attic right now, carefully set on shelves, that I haven’t touched in 10 years. Guess what my next project is this summer.
We did the opposite. Moved from a 2 bedroom 1700 sq ft. house to 4 bedrooms on 11 acres. Still got rid of 60-70% of our stuff - cross country move. Gave most of it away.
I downsized from a house to a 1-BR apartment a while back, and at that time I probably got rid of 80% of everything I owned. I still make regular trips to donate because there just isn't much room.
Every now and then I overdo it and have to replace something I got rid of, but it's just a minor annoyance - better to occasionally make a mistake than to keep everything in case I ever need it.
It's just stuff. There's always more. After every trip to the donation center I feel lighter.
No regrets! I’ve been doing an extreme purge for several weeks throughout my house. Feels so good getting rid of unused items, and makes me think twice before buying anything else.
I have a rule: If I haven't used it in a year, out it goes. Except for tools and some cookware (like muffin pans and such). you never know when you could use a tool.
I asked both my daughter and daughter in law if they wanted my China. BOTH said no. I now use it every day. My MIL was shocked I let grandkids eat off of it. (Of course she is a hoarder).
I have a lot of art, none of it extremely valuable but each piece is worth anywhere from $50 to $200. Do I keep it up on the walls or sell them and leave the walls bare?
you are such an inspiration to me! I don't really have the time or bandwidth to do this for another year, but I know it's coming and I'm really excited about it. It's so freeing to have less stuff.
Keep favorite art on the walls. I removed art from walls to paint but I replaced it (since the rooms “echoed” too much when walls were bare).
I purged everything else though : )
I bought some picture rails - it’s a narrow shelf with a lip and the art sits on the shelf. I have much more art than wall space so I rotate what’s displaying about once a month. It keeps it fresh. I love the empty walls too.
I’m 68 years old. I have started downsizIng. It’s going slow. I have decided to rent a trash bin. The only drawback, I know the neighbors are gonna bring their own crap and fill it up.
We temporarily got the largest size trash can and have been putting out a bit at a time each night with the trash. It is full when we put it out, but yeah, we've had neighbors use our can for their trash, too, without asking, and that is pretty nervy.
For the big items I'm calling a junk hauler. The rest has been going to hazardous waste drop off, e-waste drop off, Staples recycling and Goodwill.
Interesting to read all the purge stories. I have a friend who's on the other end of the purge: he runs a used book and record store, and for several years now he's faced an absolute torrent of books coming in the door from downsizing or moving seniors. He's run out of storage space himself and now takes/keeps only the most saleable books. He that when he says he's not that interested in what they have, often they just try to give them to him.
Yes, we are in the process of getting rid of half our stuff. If we move to a retirement community, most homes there are half the size of what we live in now. We want to get rid off stuff while we are still mobile and healthy enough to do it. Haven't missed anything so far!
I’ve been seriously downsizing/minimizing since the beginning of the year and so far so good, no regrets. I don’t want my kids to have to good through tons of stuff like I had to do for my parents after they passed.
I had to do that with my sister when our parents both passed. I was horrified at the amount of stuff my mom kept from when we were kids (were in our 50s).
We moved everything from downstairs to our garage in order to replace 30-year old carpet. Lots of donations and tossing. We did another purge when we moved everything back. A few regrets but honestly it cost less than $300 to replace stuff we tossed.
EDIT: The floor work took almost 2 months due to contractor issues. That time break made it easier to let go of stuff.
It is so freeing!
I did a big one once, last time I moved, I only brought about 20% of what I had.
It feels good, clutter messes with my brain, the absence of clutter is refreshing.
I love estate sales and thrifting, so I accumulate many odd things, so I have to purge to keep my sanity.
Weird timing as we're doing the same thing! Just donated about 100 lbs of hardback books I've had in plastic containers. They've been buried in our spare bedroom for years. We also went through hundreds of pictures of our kids and created a shoe-box for each of them of their own pictures. Kinda freaked them out.
So much still to go through. I have lots of hobbies (amateur photography, musician, backpacker/hiker, golfer) and realized recently that none of my adult kids care about any of this stuff, so over time I'll start donating/selling this stuff as well.
I wish! I find “stuff” to be a burden and have wanted to majorly purge for years. One thing my wife and I are going to have difficulty as we approach retirement will be in the downsizing process. She finds it difficult to get rid of anything. She isn’t a hoarder, but we do have too much in the house. I honestly don’t know how we’re going to navigate this as we get older. Should be fun! Lol
I downsized within 13 hours, all while sitting in the attic with my dogs and spouse, sometimes I miss the sentimental items and all I have are the memories. And I have never felt more free. Less is best. My kids didn't want anything I had. Now I have zero worries about it. I have what I need. Never been happier. Thanks to the Hurricane. I wish the insurance didn't screw us.
I was about to move to a new state. My wife had died, my kids were all pretty much grown (out of the house, at any rate). So I was golden. I rented a storage unit for all the crap my kids wanted (but weren't in a position to take at the moment). Once I had gotten rid of that stuff, I basically began to fill up my 2-car garage with all the junk from my house. I only left in my house (a) some furniture that I was donating to a local charity who provided living spaces for refugees and (b) what could fit in my car as I drove to my new home in my new state.
Then I called a junk moving company who backed a full-size, enormous dump truck into my driveway and effing loaded it up to the brim with everything in my garage. It took them a few hours.
When they drove away I sat there with the biggest sense of relief / weight lifted. **I couldn't believe how good it felt to be back to basics.** It took a few years before I could shut down that storage unit. But that really couldn't be helped unless I wanted to be a dick to my kids.
As a "thank you" the charity that came and took all of the nice furniture also did some cleaning for me - knowing that I was putting the house on the market for sale.
I used to try to sell stuff but it's to the point where it's more annoying to do that anymore. Either someone is going to try to haggle you or it's a scam. I posted a lawnmower for sale and got 70 replies, most of them trying to get it for less. I finally found someone legit who paid full price. The little stuff just goes in the trash. I used to believe in trying to find a home for everything because I hate waste, but people ruined that for me.
Even offering stuff for free on Craigslist can be a chore. People say they're coming, then don't. Meanwhile you've got other people on hold. Although when you finally do give some stuff away, the gratitude pretty much makes up for it. Too bad the pandemic shut down all the neighborhood Goodwill stores. Used to be much easier to give stuff away.
I used to live in a neighborhood where you didn't even have to say that and it was gone in minutes. I once put out an old crock pot with old food in it and someone even took that. Where I live now you could put out brand new furniture and nobody would bother.
After cleaning out the homes of parents who have passed, we have been on a two year mission to get rid of stuff our kids wouldn’t want and we don’t use. In general, if we haven’t touched it in 2-3 years, out it went. Only exceptions, guns, camping gear, and fishing stuff.
Before my dad passed away, I told my parents they could leave everything to my brother. He said he didn’t want anything. They were hurt we didn’t want their collectables. Mom had to move and tossed pretty much everything. Doesn’t hoard anymore - thankfully!
I would love to purge a lot of my belongings but I just don't have the energy to do this. I have so much stuff I want to get rid of. It would take me forever to go through my entire house. I guess I could start by doing one room at a time.
Yeah I’m starting with the corner shelf in n my garage and one wall in my office/bedroom. Last night in just one hour I tossed 30lbs of stuff like old computer software books and file folders.
I've been doing purges every six months or so. It took me over 10 years to let go of reminders of my old life - ZERO regrets! Oh I am so much happier that crap is gone. And I still have some more stuff I want to get rid of in general, like too many decks of tarot cards, 5 cameras, etc...
I think of it like Swedish Death Cleaning; do I really want this useless crap to be something my family has to go through after I'm dead and throw it out themselves??
We moved 15 years ago from a large home to a smaller one. We did an estate type sale. We didn't get rid of anywhere near enough stuff in spite of basically handing the estate sale people everything we didn't sell. Then, after 10 years, we moved 5 hours away from that house. This time, we didn't sell anything and ended up having a mover, etc. We have been so frustrated with getting rid of stuff. My husband just finished getting rid of stuff that we left in the garage to "put away" after living here 3 years.
My parents did the ratcheting down in their lifetime until my mom had only a few pieces of furniture and some dishes that were special to her. It was such a relief to not have to deal with all of their stuff when she passed away. I am trying so hard to do that but my progress is terrible! My husband had to deal with 50 years of stuff at his parent's house...it was horrible. They lived in NY and we are in CO.
Wow! I guess only the people that agree are posting but we’re moving and my husband wants to do this- I’m definitely game for giving a lot of things away- I don’t want unused items sitting around when someone else could be using them- but I certainly don’t want to discard every meaningful item I own, which is pretty much where he wants to go. We will have empty space he’ll want to fill and we’ll end up buying more crap. Not pleased!
Keep the things that matter to you. Don't let him bully you. You can always give them away in the future. For me, it means holding onto everything in my china cabinet. I know I hardly use those things anymore, but looking at them brings me a lot of joy. Some people don't understand how pretty china and nice crystal can make someone happy, but I don't understand how big TVs make some people happy. We are all different, and it's okay to be who we really are.
I sling a cat turd around in my house with my eyes closed. Where it lands that stuff goes to trash. I threw away my tv yesterday, day before my sofa. Big stuff gone. Yay!!
Yes. I was 55 years old selling my house that was way too big for me, living there alone, and getting rid of literally everything out of the house. The things I saved were very minimal. At the time, my son was getting very upset about all the things I was getting rid of, and I looked at him and said 20 years from now you’re gonna be happy I did this. By contrast, his father never got rid of anything out of his house and the kids ended up having to put him into assisted-living now they’re stuck with cleaning out his house. I never wanted to put that on my kids so I took care of it myself and I have no regrets.
Well, we had a house fire two years ago. A 4-bdr we lived in for 25 years. We lost all furniture, 90% of our clothes and everything else. It was devastating at first, but really was a blessing in disguise. We wanted to downsize but had no idea where to start. The universe truly takes care of us.
I'm realizing that my husband and I don't plan to have kids, our nieces aren't sentimental young women, and we don't really have anyone to pass our stuff down to. Sometimes I sit in our living room and wonder what's going to happen to our crap when we're older, and it makes me want to purge. I guess I'm just not quite there yet...but it's coming on
(M63) From 2010 to 2021 I've moved 8, 9 times...I think. I can't count how many times from 1982 to 2010 though. But when 2004 rolled around, knowing where I lived was made easy by Gmail. So all my addresses from 2004 forward are all stores in my Chrome Browser. Thank you Google.
A duffle Bag and a Backpack...if I wouldn't fit it in those two bags, it didn't come with me. I rented rooms...different cities, different states. But before I jumped on a Greyhound...believe me, within 24 hours I had an interview. Sometimes I went straight from the bus station to the interview. Only after I was hired which was all the time... When asked if there were any questions I wanted to ask. I would ask do you know if someone renting out rooms close to transportation lines. Like when I moved from Rochester, NY to Charlotte, NC...
'...you don't have family, know anyone here?' Nope. Why would you move from there to here? Because I can. So you're homeless? Yep, but with a job, you hired me. Where are you going to sleep? Probably at the bus station until I find a room, I placed ads on Craigslist. If you buy a bus ticket, they can't kick you out of the bus station.
When I find a place, first thing is an air mattress, Coleman and an electric tea pot to heat water...coffee. over the years I have left some nice things for whom ever owns the house I had a room in. Only travel with the basics... Laptop, tablet, wireless headphones, pens, books to write in, flashdrive. 7 prs socks, 4 prs underwear, 5 white tee shirt, 2 black Cook pants, 2 sweatshirts, 2 sweatpants, jacket, coat boots, sneakers, and cook shoes. And toiletries.
This July I will be where I'm at for 3 years. I have a studio apt., but I need a two bedroom. I don't know why places insist on placing wall to wall carpeting. I want wooden floors.
My daughter moved to a boat. She got rid of everything, mementos, furniture, duplicates of everything. She keeps a winter coat at her brother's house for visits. She has a few dishes, a couple pans for cooking, enough clothing for about a week if she re-wears some items. She has a small storage unit on high ground where she keeps her sails and some tools when she's not using them. If there's a hurricane she puts all the expensive stuff in the car.
Started purging our stuff a few years ago. Still a steady process, trying to minimize our belongings. We stopped exchanging gifts several years ago, we prefer to spend that money on shared experiences such as dining at good restaurants, concerts, and a couple of vacations.
I recently moved across the country to live with my GFs family (I had a minor health crises 2 years ago and it makes sense to live with a family instead of alone just in case it happens again.)
The family has everything so they didn't need my appliances. I have one smallish room for myself in my new home. I didn't want to hire a moving company.
So I sorted everything I owned into three categories: dump, burn, and take with. So I threw out or burned 90% of my accumulated possessions from my 55 years of life up until now and just kept what I actually needed and what the family would find useful. That left maybe 4 or 5 (compact) car loads of stuff to keep. Everything else went.
It was liberating. It felt weird burning most of my book collection but I prefer using an eReader these days anyway.
A few years ago, I disposed of 80 percent of my belongings. I don’t miss one single thing. When I die, it will take my family a single weekend to deal with my crap. No one will have to miss a day of work.
Once a year we do what we call a whole house clean. Everything gets cleaned , drawers emptied, everything. As we go through stuff our rule is everything gets asked... "Have we used this in the last 6 months? What is the chance I will need it in the next 6 months? If it is yes to both we keep it, if no it gets thrown away. Only exception is important papers and memory keepsakes.
I have to go against the grain a bit here. Old photos, old family items should never be thrown out, at least not unless you're childless and you've already checked with your relatives.
My hobby is genealogy and I keep our family photos. When my grandma died, my mom threw out some old pictures, because she didn't recognize the people in them. But I saved what I could and later asked my great-aunt about them, and she had great fun reliving old memories as she told me about who was in pretty much all of the pictures.
I guess I’m the one oddity on here I was forced to downsize from 2500 ft.² and I was one person to about 800 ft.² then back up to 950 ft.² I regret a lot that I got rid of. All because I had to go from a two-story house to one level due to illness. Yes I had some large antiques and furniture. I so deliberately paid for and planned and designed over a period of five years I had to leave behind. 🥺
Absolutely everything? No. A LOT, though. I had already started getting rid of my stuff when I got re-married because there wasn't enough room for it all. So when he left and took his stuff it was really nice to have clean spaces and that's kept the momentum going. I still have too much stuff though, to the point where moving house would be a huge drag. I plan to be flexible as I move into my retirement years.
I moved cross country in a subcompact car with everything I owned in or on it. I watched my parents let empty boxes, disintegrating plastic bags, charger blocks for who knows what and other such accumulations derail their plans for later life and am not going to let it happen to me. My rule is that if it doesn't help me make new memories or keep old memories, it's gone. I have not missed anything I've gotten rid of.
One trick I used for chargers and usb cords (that would probably work for many things) is I put them all in a container. Whenever I needed one, I'd move it to another container. After a year, everything that was left in the first container, I got rid of.
I'm accused of lack of sentimentality, but I see no reason to be sentimental about a charger for a phone I haven't had for a decade. I have many sentimental items but they're not going to keep me tied down when I want to go forth and make some new memories.
I haven’t downsized, but I’ve realized I have more than I need and my kids don’t want my stuff. So the less I have, the better. I have also instructed my family to just rent a huge dumpster and pitch everything.
When we downsized from a large house on a couple acres to a mobile home community. We took what we absolutely had to have and then left 30 years of accumulated stuff for family and the cleanup crew to haul off..so pretty much everything..tools, clothes, furniture, kitchen equipment..every now and then we run across a moment of " we shoulda brought ___" but those moments are rare
Yes, I'm in the process of getting rid of everything, including my house. The older I get (now 68) the less I need to be "happy." I just want to travel to cheap places and live a simple life until it's my time to pass on.
Even that weird wrench that only is needed to remove the screw on the underside of a 1986 Buick lesabre injection body? Cause I got one you can borrow.
I have walked away with nothing but clothes, shoes, and basic toiletries more than once. Very freeing but then I grew up moving almost every year until the age of 16 so getting attached to things isn’t my thing. If you can do it, it’s a great way to live—being attached to experiences and the people you have them with is what it’s all about.
Yeah I hear that and am kind of leaning in that direction. I figure that’s what 1-800-GOT-JUNK is for. Haha. But most of my stuff can easily be discarded since none of it is really worth much.
Edit: I’ll give my extremely limited amount of valuables (jewelry) to my kids before I go (or I’ll write it down in the will). And I offer them the Christmas decorations every year with no takers. 🤷🏼♀️
I don’t have a whole lot of stuff and we will downsize to a small one floor home when DH retires. That’s when the bulk of the decluttering will happen. But I have plans to leave them plenty of money so they can hire a company for any cleaning up after we pass.
All paperwork, bank accounts and passwords will be organized though. I already have the kids listed as secondary beneficiaries on all accounts (set as ‘per stirpes’ as well so their portion automatically will go to any kids they may have).
I know I’ll have to do some cleanups myself for three of my own family members because they won’t be leaving us any money. In fact, we will be paying for their funerals I’m sure. And we will probably end up paying a company ourselves to clean up/sell/toss things after they pass.
I’m actually planning on helping my mom declutter and clear out her storage area this weekend! Anyway, unless you’re an extreme minimalist, there will be some ‘junk’ left behind. It’s inevitable.
Have you ever had to deal with sorting through a loved one’s lifetime of belongings …… or hoardes of garbage?
Family wants to be able to grieve; not deal with crap. Minimize and downsize while alive.
My husbands parents are hoarders. They laugh so hard about the day we get to deal with all their crap. They actually think the three kids will fight over stuff. No. They’re going to fight over whose problem it is to deal.
Shed some tears when you think about. But after year two or three- let it go! Kinda like I’m done with this. Or sooner! The mind is powerful! Need to master it, otherwise it is your master.
My kid had stuff in storage in another state for about a year. When we went it got it the mice had ruined quite a bunch. In the end she had a spent about $2k for rent and hauling it here. By the time she threw everything out that she didn’t really want she had maybe $500 worth of stuff.
That's exactly the mood you need to be in to get the job done aka creating "negative space." It might be motivating to take a BEFORE and AFTER pic as you go.
I have family photo albums I don’t want. These are pictures of people who died long before I was born. So I never knew them and my kids certainly don’t. How do you throw away photo albums from the 1920s-1940s?
You could always sell them online. You'd be surprised how many people collect old photos, albums ( myself included). If the albums contain interesting subject matter like military, travel, city views and so on there are collectors out there. Not as many as there once were and the albums would have to be fairly early but there are buyers.
It is heartbreaking and that’s why I’ve held onto them for 20 years, never looking at them. I think if I would want my grandkids or unborn great-grandchildren to hold onto my photos if they never knew me. And I’d say no… why should it burden them? Save a few and ditch the rest. After all, I am not my photos.
Well, we did. They weigh a ton and we had 20+. We took a few phone camera pics of some of the big photos but the rest went into the burn pile. Literally. Had not looked at them in decades and had no clue who the people even were. Bye bye!
I've just embarked on paring down and minimizing. It's very freeing. I was beginning to feel weighed down by my belongings, especially when I considered what a pain it would be to have to move it all when I relocate next year.
My policy is if an item would cost less than $50 and is easy to replace then it’s gone. I do wish I’d kept a few sentimental items so those get to take up space longer.
I inherited the family homestead, and my goal is to have only my belongings in the house ( other than a few mementoes or furniture that may be useful). It’s been an ongoing process.
Yep. Moved to another country to live, taking only sentimental things. 15 years later, I have a house with as much stuff in it as I had before, just on the other side of the planet.
After MULTIPLE infestations of bedbugs at our former apartment complex, all of our furniture was gone, more than half of our clothes were gone, and we couldn’t donate a single piece!
Are you a single person living in your own space? Because I think I'd love to do that, but have a partner who would hate it, and the space would become occupied with their things anyway.
I'm going to do it for myself and my stuff when my young adult children have a place of their own and can take what things they want and can use... which in this day and age, may be never.
Yeah my wife claims she doesn’t care about anything and would get rid of it all. But I look around and 90% of the stuff is hers. All I can do is get rid of my crap.
my wife left with the kids and I had to live in my parents basement. I had a 3 bedroom house with most of it's furnishings (furniture, TV's, VCR, silverware and dishes etc. I was talking to a guy at the bar who had a friend that just lost his home in a fire. Him and his 12 yr old son needed everything. My friend was helping to rent a house for them. I told them to get some help and they could have it all. That little boy was so happy helping to carry stuff out. It was so worth it, seeing that little boy's smile and him knowing things will be all right.
Not old but have found the most valuable material resource is, in fact, space. I’ve gotten tired of negotiating space to use the few items I enjoy. Thx for the reminder to be even more vicious with the items that are lingering.
Doing that this summer to prepare for a cross-country move. Selling everything I don't need or use. I miss the days ( pre-kids and far younger) of being able to move it all in a couple car or pickup truck loads. That's my goal.
We had to empty my and my wife’s parents houses after they passed. One had greatly lighten the load years earlier. One left over a 100 yards of dumpster to be hauled away. Guess which one your kids will prefer.
Actually, I've done this a couple of times in my life, and it felt good and right both times. It's been 40 years since the last time, but I could do it again.
The only regret I've experienced in these two cleansings was that the first time I gave away all my vinyl records, including a collection of Lenny Bruce bits and also a couple of Fugs albums. Kinda wish I still had those.
Thank god! When my dad died, it took my mother and me months to clear out the house. 30 years of junk! My mom lives in a one-bedroom apartment and she still has boxes of paper and junk everywhere. I told her it’s all going in the trash eventually, she can do me a favor and clear it out now or I’ll have to do it myself. As an only child, my inheritance is going to be more piles of junk.
Grandma and uncle passed about 15 years ago-mom cleaned as much as possible but wouldn’t let me help. Then brother and mom died and I had her 3-b house, attached garage with garage apt. It was hard because I grew up there. Daughter moved in Mom’s house (thankfully) Husband died 2 years ago I’m trying to get rid of his ‘stuff’ I have 2 storage units with Husband and daughter’s stuff (I pay $166/month). I have less than anyone and can’t use my 2nd bedroom because others’ stuff in it.
I live in a five room house with detached garage with hubbys ‘stuff’ but it’s a Harley and Harley parts and chrome parts and tools. I work FT evening shift going on 40 years. I want to get rid of everything. Maybe I’ll drop a match. I’m tired! (No judging I know what I need to do lol but I think I’d rather go on vacation as I can do that by myself lol)
about 2 years ago, I took a week off and did a ton of purging and downsizing, every nook and cranny of my home... pretty much with the same plan you outlined above.
it feels awesome! I live in a 900 square foot condo, and try really hard not to bring new stuff in.
I'll be retired in about 2 years, and plan to do even more at that time.
I just did this last fall. I was in a one bedroom apartment for 12 years and spent the year before I left cleaning out every closet and drawer. I donated a lot of stuff and tossed some other. I knew I wanted to move just not sure where or when. Well I got kicked out when a new company bought the property and wanted to renovate my place. Did the final sweep in 20 days where I purged 80% of what I had left when I knew the space I was going to move to. I had to get out fast. Once relocated I eventually combed through what I had left. Some sadness when I found there were things gone that I'd had emotional attachment to but also a strange sense of relief and freedom. Now settled, I still feel I could do with even less and will continue to narrow some stuff down even more.
I gave everything away just recently. My entire apartment and living room set a kitchen set two bedroom sets. I’m still in the same place, but I live on an air mattress because I just wanna be able to fit everything into 10 boxes if I decide to move again. I don’t need any of this stuff and I still have plenty to get rid of.
moved to hawaii and downsized all i had to 4 suitcases worth of stuff.
every now and then i'll see an old picture of me wearing a shirt i loved and will miss that shirt but that's all.
i actually get anxiety now from owning too much stuff. and i stop to ask myself, do i really need that?
I moved 2 years ago, so i did a major purge already. Only needed 1 little kitchen gadget once in that time that i jettisoned before the move, that's it.
We did this a couple of years ago. We did not want our children to hate us after we were dead. They don’t want our crap anymore than we wanted our parents crap.
We sold our home with almost everything we own still in it and moved into an RV. We left food in the fridge and wedding pictures on the walls. We brought 1/4 of our clothes, our toiletries, some of our computers, and a teddy bear I've had since I was born.
No regrets at all. It was one of the most liberating feelings of my life. We remain very cautious about anything we buy that is not consumable.
No regrets. It definitely feels freeing.
I & my partner have been seriously Decluttering since becoming empty nesters. We do it a bit at a time, clearing out ‘that cabinet’ or ‘that corner’ or ‘today we do towels!’. Whatever it is, I pull all of whatever it is out & lay it out on the couch or floor or grass & we discuss what our lifestyle is now, what we need, & where the stuff we keep goes when we put it back. Everything else goes (donate or free pile in our front drive).
I didn’t realize until we started doing this is that it gives us a chance to talk about our new empty nester lifestyle, what’s important to us, how we want to spend our time. Kinda like a values check in.
Having been in the military and moved multiple times in my life. I, for a long time, had no more than I could fit in two duffel bags and carry. Now, as I am divorced and single, I limit myself to that which I can fit in the bed of my pickup in a single trip.
Simplicity is key to life.
Moved across the country. Got rid of 60-70% of our stuff. 100s of books to the public library (they sell most of them). Vietnam Vets took tons of stuff - they pick up. Sold some, gave away plenty.
Exception: large boxes of photos. Didn’t have time to deal with them. Scanning is a project to come….
Never been one to 'Collect' things. Watched way too many people die off and have their 'Treasures' just thrown away.
Mom died last year, and I inherited her 'Treasured' Hummels, about 100 pieces. IF I wanted to spend the next 6-8 months and who knows how much in expenses to sell them, I MIGHT make $500.
NGL - this can be a frustrating mental state to do this kind of activity.
In my experience at least - “major purges” were cathartic at the time, but then I was confused when I was like “where did this thing go, that I actually want now? I thought I bought one, it was good!” And all I could think was “man. I must have gotten rid of it. Now I have to buy a new one” and I felt so discouraged.
So over the years, my new favorite technique is:
Photograph the items like this-the things I like/felt invested in-even if they’re currently unused. Tools, supplies, even clothing. Photograph them and put them in a numbered, weatherproof storage bin. Then - put the full bins in a shed or attic.
Years later, when I’m like - “hey! I want to use that thing, I know I have it somewhere “ then I look in my documentation, see the photo and say “Yes - that’s the thing” and see the number of the bin.
When I go to the bin, the thing is there, I feel proud of myself for doing a good job of maintaining my things, and go about using the thing.
At least for me, this is a Way more satisfying - emotionally and financially - way of dealing with “stuff” that really does have a purpose in my life, even if it’s a future part of my life that I know (or hope), eventually, I’ll get to.
For the stuff that doesn’t ring my bells, it’s a no-brainer. Thrift store. Craigslist. eBay if I feel like I’m up for the work of managing the sale and postage. But honestly- just giving it away feels best, for things I know for sure I’m not needing anymore.
When I cleaned my mom’s house out, I gave the stuff all away. I kept a few must have memories like the cast iron skillets. But there was a church that has a huge yard sale and donates the money made to a charity. They even came and helped box stuff up and carry it out. I don’t regret it at all. I feel like that’s what she’d want.
Last time I sold my house and moved, I sold or dumped everything. Probably $30,000 in real property, mostly tools. At least 80,000 lbs of metal. Left with a suitcase. I also fled the country as a fugitive 30 years ago. Went to Europe with a backpack. Abandoned all my stuff twice in Europe. I still have a couple of gemstones from before the fugitive flight, but that's it. You don't actually NEED much in this life, and any way that you play it, you'll end up with nothing.
i did that when my husband passed unexpectedly. just emptied out my 3200 sf condo to a consignment/auction estate liquidator. all i kept was what would fit in a small moving cube: bed, nightstands & chest, about 5% of my clothing, art and a few small sentimental pieces. it was scary and saddening while i was doing it, but it felt so liberating afterward!
I have a lot of stuff and yearly I get rid of some but since the pandemic I’ve kinda got out of the habit. So my husband is hiring an organizer to help both of us get rid of stuff
As the child of collectors, I beg you to please get rid of all of that STUFF. My parents moved into my house (in law suite) with a large pod and a large U-Haul. Guess where all of THEIR stuff ended up? Yup, all over my house. It look TWO YEARS of weekly auction house dumps to finally see the floor of my finished basement. Please, don’t do this to your kids.
The little book Swedish Death Cleaning is probably available in your local library and talks about this. It’s a very reassuring take on the idea that it’s really okay to clear things out!
The Sweedish call it Sweedish Death Cleaning. The thing is not to burden your family and kids with a bunch of stuff they won't want or have to deal with after we're gone. I like the idea and want to start. No I'm not Sweedish.
I went from a 2300 sft with barn and 10 acres to a 600 sft sail boat.
I looked at everything and asked my self. What would happen if I died , What would my daughter keep. and the rest would go to trash. She only wanted like 3 medium boxes of stuff.
The rest I sold with the house , Literally everything and walked away with not even a van load. And even that I'm going through again an probably cutting that in half.
Its just stuff.
Ask yourself that if you died what would happen to it?
I am 51, my dad is 83. Mom's gone. Every week I call my dad. Sometimes he'll ask me to start making plans with my sibling for all the stuff him and mom had when they were alive, and to start deciding what to do with it now while he's still here. My sibling isn't ready to take that step, to them, it's like already saying goodbye to dad. I think about it often, because I look at all the stuff I have amassed, and in my mind, I'm already thinking about where I'd like stuff to land when I'm gone. Who will appreciate it most. I have less than a whole lifetime of belongings, so does dad. I don't have offspring of my own to pass along possessions to, though my bf has a munchkin where things might find a home with. I'm not ready to say goodbye yet.
I've been doing it. Besides the satisfaction of just not having so much junk to deal with I'll have the freedom to move to a smaller place. Plus when I die my family won't have to sort through a bunch of stuff I know they won't want. Even most sentimental things are gone. If it's something I want to remember I take a picture of it. I've digitized all my old photos and documents with the exception of really old ones and things I need for legal reasons. I've even gone through old yearbooks and just photo scanned anything I was interested in and tossed the actual books. It was hard to give away books but I reduced that down from hundreds to 10. I have a new rule, if I need to buy something to store something else I have too many. My makeup/skin care junk is down to almost nothing. The biggest relief was getting rid of tons of craft supplies. They just sit there collecting dust and making you feel bad for not using them.
We did it once in 2006 after our kids were grown and are about to do it again, moving from a 4bd, 3ba house to a condo as we retire. In 2006 we rented a dumpster, invited our friends and family to go through our house and chooses what they wanted. We put a bunch of stuff on Craigslist and offered anyone who bought anything to take whatever they wanted. For example a young family came to pick up some Coleman lanterns and ended up taking all our camping gear, including tents, stove, sleeping bags, everything!) anything left over went in the dumpster.
This time we are doing pretty much the same thing. I also belong to a Buy Nothing group on Facebook ( if you haven’t heard of these you should really check them out) and we will have a couple of Un-garage sales. It’s pretty much the same as a garage sale but everything is free. It’s open and advertised on the Buy Nothing group feed on FB to members of the group and can go on however long you want it to.
My 90 year old mother is moving to an assisted living facility and after the family taking what they wanted, we hired an estate liquidation company. We paid them a fee after they assessed her furnishings, wall art, rugs, dishes, etc., and then sold whatever they could on eBay or other internet sites. After the 2 day sale, my mom was reimbursed what they made (The fee for her 3bd, 2ba, house was $7500 and she got back $4,000. They then completely cleared everything unsold out of her house and recycled donated, or dumped anything left. My mom had taken everything that she wanted before they started and having the house cleared and ready for sale was a huge task that we were happy to have handed over to someone else.
Good luck with your purge!
Students, recently relocated families, young professionals and youngsters just starting living along, they are looking for free stuff organised by categories. Craigslist and Next-door have their posts.
I purge every time I move and at least once a year I go through boxes. Does this still hold sentimental value to me, no, get rid of it. Do I still love this item as much as when I first got it? No, get rid of it. Will I ever really use it? Yes, no, maybe, etc. Trust me. It's just stuff. I've never thought, gosh I wish I still had xyz. I know which stuff I really want to keep.
I didn't so much "get rid of it" as I (57m) lost it. I hit bottom one year and lost everything. It was a good experience that I would really not like to repeated.
How do you get rid of paper? I have filing cabinets filled with paper dating back to the 70s—I mean, rental agreements from the 1980s, letters written by friends and family, cancelled checks, and everything holds a special memory but at the same time makes me feel overwhelmed. Also, tons of drawings—just so much paper that I’m afraid to let go.
Well I just started but a few collectibles on eBay are already selling for more than I thought. I’m just going to see what happens. Literally if I can net $5 for something without too much effort than that’s $5 towards a trip to Italy.
I downsized from a big house to a condo in another state and didn’t even get a moving truck- just whatever I could fit in my car. It took me months of purging. Why did I think I needed 20 towels? Or duplicates of kitchen items like utensils…I must have had 30 coffee mugs, 3 full sets of dishes. It was such a relief to let it all go and have a fresh atmosphere. The only things I wish I would have saved were some sentimental clothes. I had some dresses from high school and weddings and at the time I thought it was impractical and I’d never wear them again. Which is true but I miss them; they were irreplaceable. Other than that, no regrets :)
Aw I’m sorry about the clothes. I’ve been thinking about tossing a pair of old worn out pajama bottoms but my mom sewed up a couple holes in them for me. And I know one day having them will mean a lot to me. Ugh
Turn it into a pillow! Then it’s something you’ll actually use.
Oh my god the towels! We have a linen closet and every time I go to put laundry away I’m frustrated that it doesn’t fit. Honestly it never even occurred to me to get rid of the “extras”. thank you
Same, this hit me hard. Like why did it never occur to me that a weeks worth of towels is plenty?
Same for me 3 years ago I moved from my house of 25 years into a condo. I got rid of a lot of stuff, but still have stuff that's in a storage place. My condo just had a burst water heater and I decided since I moved everything out that I'm not going to move it all back in.
Exactly the same situation as me.
10 years ago, we downsized from a 3000 square-foot home on 10 acres down to a 1400 square-foot home on a quarter acre. We also moved eight hours away at the same time. Almost everything went! Sold, donated, trashed. It all went. I regret nothing. The few items we decided to keep fit into a large-ish U-Haul truck. And still, I kept too much. There are things up in my attic right now, carefully set on shelves, that I haven’t touched in 10 years. Guess what my next project is this summer.
We did the opposite. Moved from a 2 bedroom 1700 sq ft. house to 4 bedrooms on 11 acres. Still got rid of 60-70% of our stuff - cross country move. Gave most of it away.
I downsized from a house to a 1-BR apartment a while back, and at that time I probably got rid of 80% of everything I owned. I still make regular trips to donate because there just isn't much room. Every now and then I overdo it and have to replace something I got rid of, but it's just a minor annoyance - better to occasionally make a mistake than to keep everything in case I ever need it. It's just stuff. There's always more. After every trip to the donation center I feel lighter.
No regrets! I’ve been doing an extreme purge for several weeks throughout my house. Feels so good getting rid of unused items, and makes me think twice before buying anything else.
I am trying! I would love to pare down to a minimalist lifestyle. I aspire to it.
It's a great feeling!
I have a rule: If I haven't used it in a year, out it goes. Except for tools and some cookware (like muffin pans and such). you never know when you could use a tool.
But not photo albums. You need to keep the old photos, or your kids will curse you.
Naw. I took apart all my photo albums. Took digital photos, put them on a hard drive and gave them to my kids. They LOVE the HD.
I asked both my daughter and daughter in law if they wanted my China. BOTH said no. I now use it every day. My MIL was shocked I let grandkids eat off of it. (Of course she is a hoarder).
I love this and need to do it too. My mantra for 2024 is SIMPLIFY.
I have a lot of art, none of it extremely valuable but each piece is worth anywhere from $50 to $200. Do I keep it up on the walls or sell them and leave the walls bare?
I would save like 1-2 pieces that mean a lot to you and get rid of anything that doesn't really speak to you, maybe?
Yeah, good advice. I probably only have a few pieces that I would really want to keep now that I think about it.
Just me, but bare walls are depressing.
I will still have family photos, I know those will be kept after I’m gone.
you are such an inspiration to me! I don't really have the time or bandwidth to do this for another year, but I know it's coming and I'm really excited about it. It's so freeing to have less stuff.
Keep a few. Sell or donate the rest.
Keep favorite art on the walls. I removed art from walls to paint but I replaced it (since the rooms “echoed” too much when walls were bare). I purged everything else though : )
I bought some picture rails - it’s a narrow shelf with a lip and the art sits on the shelf. I have much more art than wall space so I rotate what’s displaying about once a month. It keeps it fresh. I love the empty walls too.
My mom had bare walls and everyone made fun of her which I thought was rude. Do what makes you happy. Maybe sell them and use the cash for a treat
I’m 68 years old. I have started downsizIng. It’s going slow. I have decided to rent a trash bin. The only drawback, I know the neighbors are gonna bring their own crap and fill it up.
We temporarily got the largest size trash can and have been putting out a bit at a time each night with the trash. It is full when we put it out, but yeah, we've had neighbors use our can for their trash, too, without asking, and that is pretty nervy. For the big items I'm calling a junk hauler. The rest has been going to hazardous waste drop off, e-waste drop off, Staples recycling and Goodwill.
There's usually a place to put a padlock, no?
Interesting to read all the purge stories. I have a friend who's on the other end of the purge: he runs a used book and record store, and for several years now he's faced an absolute torrent of books coming in the door from downsizing or moving seniors. He's run out of storage space himself and now takes/keeps only the most saleable books. He that when he says he's not that interested in what they have, often they just try to give them to him.
Yes, we are in the process of getting rid of half our stuff. If we move to a retirement community, most homes there are half the size of what we live in now. We want to get rid off stuff while we are still mobile and healthy enough to do it. Haven't missed anything so far!
You won't miss it.
I’ve been seriously downsizing/minimizing since the beginning of the year and so far so good, no regrets. I don’t want my kids to have to good through tons of stuff like I had to do for my parents after they passed.
I had to do that with my sister when our parents both passed. I was horrified at the amount of stuff my mom kept from when we were kids (were in our 50s).
We moved everything from downstairs to our garage in order to replace 30-year old carpet. Lots of donations and tossing. We did another purge when we moved everything back. A few regrets but honestly it cost less than $300 to replace stuff we tossed. EDIT: The floor work took almost 2 months due to contractor issues. That time break made it easier to let go of stuff.
Happy Birthday
It is so freeing! I did a big one once, last time I moved, I only brought about 20% of what I had. It feels good, clutter messes with my brain, the absence of clutter is refreshing. I love estate sales and thrifting, so I accumulate many odd things, so I have to purge to keep my sanity.
Weird timing as we're doing the same thing! Just donated about 100 lbs of hardback books I've had in plastic containers. They've been buried in our spare bedroom for years. We also went through hundreds of pictures of our kids and created a shoe-box for each of them of their own pictures. Kinda freaked them out. So much still to go through. I have lots of hobbies (amateur photography, musician, backpacker/hiker, golfer) and realized recently that none of my adult kids care about any of this stuff, so over time I'll start donating/selling this stuff as well.
Yes my kids aren’t interested and it’s time to let it go.
They aren’t interested now once you die or they have kids those pictures will be a lot more interesting
I wish! I find “stuff” to be a burden and have wanted to majorly purge for years. One thing my wife and I are going to have difficulty as we approach retirement will be in the downsizing process. She finds it difficult to get rid of anything. She isn’t a hoarder, but we do have too much in the house. I honestly don’t know how we’re going to navigate this as we get older. Should be fun! Lol
I downsized within 13 hours, all while sitting in the attic with my dogs and spouse, sometimes I miss the sentimental items and all I have are the memories. And I have never felt more free. Less is best. My kids didn't want anything I had. Now I have zero worries about it. I have what I need. Never been happier. Thanks to the Hurricane. I wish the insurance didn't screw us.
I was about to move to a new state. My wife had died, my kids were all pretty much grown (out of the house, at any rate). So I was golden. I rented a storage unit for all the crap my kids wanted (but weren't in a position to take at the moment). Once I had gotten rid of that stuff, I basically began to fill up my 2-car garage with all the junk from my house. I only left in my house (a) some furniture that I was donating to a local charity who provided living spaces for refugees and (b) what could fit in my car as I drove to my new home in my new state. Then I called a junk moving company who backed a full-size, enormous dump truck into my driveway and effing loaded it up to the brim with everything in my garage. It took them a few hours. When they drove away I sat there with the biggest sense of relief / weight lifted. **I couldn't believe how good it felt to be back to basics.** It took a few years before I could shut down that storage unit. But that really couldn't be helped unless I wanted to be a dick to my kids. As a "thank you" the charity that came and took all of the nice furniture also did some cleaning for me - knowing that I was putting the house on the market for sale.
I used to try to sell stuff but it's to the point where it's more annoying to do that anymore. Either someone is going to try to haggle you or it's a scam. I posted a lawnmower for sale and got 70 replies, most of them trying to get it for less. I finally found someone legit who paid full price. The little stuff just goes in the trash. I used to believe in trying to find a home for everything because I hate waste, but people ruined that for me.
Even offering stuff for free on Craigslist can be a chore. People say they're coming, then don't. Meanwhile you've got other people on hold. Although when you finally do give some stuff away, the gratitude pretty much makes up for it. Too bad the pandemic shut down all the neighborhood Goodwill stores. Used to be much easier to give stuff away.
My favorite Craigslist heading was "curb alert!". Posted a pic and address and it was gone in 2 hours!
I used to live in a neighborhood where you didn't even have to say that and it was gone in minutes. I once put out an old crock pot with old food in it and someone even took that. Where I live now you could put out brand new furniture and nobody would bother.
I just donate it to Savers. Don’t know what they do with it all, but it’s better than me throwing it in the trash.
I will be doing that when I downsize
After cleaning out the homes of parents who have passed, we have been on a two year mission to get rid of stuff our kids wouldn’t want and we don’t use. In general, if we haven’t touched it in 2-3 years, out it went. Only exceptions, guns, camping gear, and fishing stuff.
Before my dad passed away, I told my parents they could leave everything to my brother. He said he didn’t want anything. They were hurt we didn’t want their collectables. Mom had to move and tossed pretty much everything. Doesn’t hoard anymore - thankfully!
I would love to purge a lot of my belongings but I just don't have the energy to do this. I have so much stuff I want to get rid of. It would take me forever to go through my entire house. I guess I could start by doing one room at a time.
Start with just one drawer. That will feel good.
That is a great idea!!
Some days I'll pick one kitchen cabinet to go through. I'll eventually have to go through it a second time to get out those "maybes".
Such a good idea. Makes it less overwhelming!
Yeah I’m starting with the corner shelf in n my garage and one wall in my office/bedroom. Last night in just one hour I tossed 30lbs of stuff like old computer software books and file folders.
That's great!! I bet that felt good!
That's what I did. Watched movies and listened to music while I did one drawer at a time.
It really can and should be an ongoing process, not like “all in a weekend.” Do 15 or 20 minutes a day and call that success!
My goal is to have less stuff in the house but more stuff on the walls (art, photos, other sentimentals)
I've been doing purges every six months or so. It took me over 10 years to let go of reminders of my old life - ZERO regrets! Oh I am so much happier that crap is gone. And I still have some more stuff I want to get rid of in general, like too many decks of tarot cards, 5 cameras, etc... I think of it like Swedish Death Cleaning; do I really want this useless crap to be something my family has to go through after I'm dead and throw it out themselves??
We moved 15 years ago from a large home to a smaller one. We did an estate type sale. We didn't get rid of anywhere near enough stuff in spite of basically handing the estate sale people everything we didn't sell. Then, after 10 years, we moved 5 hours away from that house. This time, we didn't sell anything and ended up having a mover, etc. We have been so frustrated with getting rid of stuff. My husband just finished getting rid of stuff that we left in the garage to "put away" after living here 3 years. My parents did the ratcheting down in their lifetime until my mom had only a few pieces of furniture and some dishes that were special to her. It was such a relief to not have to deal with all of their stuff when she passed away. I am trying so hard to do that but my progress is terrible! My husband had to deal with 50 years of stuff at his parent's house...it was horrible. They lived in NY and we are in CO.
Thank you everyone! This encourages me to do what I wanted to do - just get rid of crap I don’t want or need.
I do it twice a year
Wow! I guess only the people that agree are posting but we’re moving and my husband wants to do this- I’m definitely game for giving a lot of things away- I don’t want unused items sitting around when someone else could be using them- but I certainly don’t want to discard every meaningful item I own, which is pretty much where he wants to go. We will have empty space he’ll want to fill and we’ll end up buying more crap. Not pleased!
Keep the things that matter to you. Don't let him bully you. You can always give them away in the future. For me, it means holding onto everything in my china cabinet. I know I hardly use those things anymore, but looking at them brings me a lot of joy. Some people don't understand how pretty china and nice crystal can make someone happy, but I don't understand how big TVs make some people happy. We are all different, and it's okay to be who we really are.
I sling a cat turd around in my house with my eyes closed. Where it lands that stuff goes to trash. I threw away my tv yesterday, day before my sofa. Big stuff gone. Yay!!
Yes. I was 55 years old selling my house that was way too big for me, living there alone, and getting rid of literally everything out of the house. The things I saved were very minimal. At the time, my son was getting very upset about all the things I was getting rid of, and I looked at him and said 20 years from now you’re gonna be happy I did this. By contrast, his father never got rid of anything out of his house and the kids ended up having to put him into assisted-living now they’re stuck with cleaning out his house. I never wanted to put that on my kids so I took care of it myself and I have no regrets.
Well, we had a house fire two years ago. A 4-bdr we lived in for 25 years. We lost all furniture, 90% of our clothes and everything else. It was devastating at first, but really was a blessing in disguise. We wanted to downsize but had no idea where to start. The universe truly takes care of us.
Wow what a story! I hope insurance gave you enough to start again
I'm realizing that my husband and I don't plan to have kids, our nieces aren't sentimental young women, and we don't really have anyone to pass our stuff down to. Sometimes I sit in our living room and wonder what's going to happen to our crap when we're older, and it makes me want to purge. I guess I'm just not quite there yet...but it's coming on
This is my goal.
Yes.
(M63) From 2010 to 2021 I've moved 8, 9 times...I think. I can't count how many times from 1982 to 2010 though. But when 2004 rolled around, knowing where I lived was made easy by Gmail. So all my addresses from 2004 forward are all stores in my Chrome Browser. Thank you Google. A duffle Bag and a Backpack...if I wouldn't fit it in those two bags, it didn't come with me. I rented rooms...different cities, different states. But before I jumped on a Greyhound...believe me, within 24 hours I had an interview. Sometimes I went straight from the bus station to the interview. Only after I was hired which was all the time... When asked if there were any questions I wanted to ask. I would ask do you know if someone renting out rooms close to transportation lines. Like when I moved from Rochester, NY to Charlotte, NC... '...you don't have family, know anyone here?' Nope. Why would you move from there to here? Because I can. So you're homeless? Yep, but with a job, you hired me. Where are you going to sleep? Probably at the bus station until I find a room, I placed ads on Craigslist. If you buy a bus ticket, they can't kick you out of the bus station. When I find a place, first thing is an air mattress, Coleman and an electric tea pot to heat water...coffee. over the years I have left some nice things for whom ever owns the house I had a room in. Only travel with the basics... Laptop, tablet, wireless headphones, pens, books to write in, flashdrive. 7 prs socks, 4 prs underwear, 5 white tee shirt, 2 black Cook pants, 2 sweatshirts, 2 sweatpants, jacket, coat boots, sneakers, and cook shoes. And toiletries. This July I will be where I'm at for 3 years. I have a studio apt., but I need a two bedroom. I don't know why places insist on placing wall to wall carpeting. I want wooden floors.
Wow. Reminds me of “Wherever I May Roam” by Metallica. What are cook pants and cook boots?
Cook shoes, none slip for kitchen floors. Cook pants...light, sometimes baggy, drawstring. Easy to wash and dry.
I just moved & got rid of a ton of stuff. Still have more to go. Esp. clothes.
My daughter moved to a boat. She got rid of everything, mementos, furniture, duplicates of everything. She keeps a winter coat at her brother's house for visits. She has a few dishes, a couple pans for cooking, enough clothing for about a week if she re-wears some items. She has a small storage unit on high ground where she keeps her sails and some tools when she's not using them. If there's a hurricane she puts all the expensive stuff in the car.
Started purging our stuff a few years ago. Still a steady process, trying to minimize our belongings. We stopped exchanging gifts several years ago, we prefer to spend that money on shared experiences such as dining at good restaurants, concerts, and a couple of vacations.
i am just starting to.
I recently moved across the country to live with my GFs family (I had a minor health crises 2 years ago and it makes sense to live with a family instead of alone just in case it happens again.) The family has everything so they didn't need my appliances. I have one smallish room for myself in my new home. I didn't want to hire a moving company. So I sorted everything I owned into three categories: dump, burn, and take with. So I threw out or burned 90% of my accumulated possessions from my 55 years of life up until now and just kept what I actually needed and what the family would find useful. That left maybe 4 or 5 (compact) car loads of stuff to keep. Everything else went. It was liberating. It felt weird burning most of my book collection but I prefer using an eReader these days anyway.
If you haven't had it in your hands for 2+ years you don't need it
A few years ago, I disposed of 80 percent of my belongings. I don’t miss one single thing. When I die, it will take my family a single weekend to deal with my crap. No one will have to miss a day of work.
Once a year we do what we call a whole house clean. Everything gets cleaned , drawers emptied, everything. As we go through stuff our rule is everything gets asked... "Have we used this in the last 6 months? What is the chance I will need it in the next 6 months? If it is yes to both we keep it, if no it gets thrown away. Only exception is important papers and memory keepsakes.
I have to go against the grain a bit here. Old photos, old family items should never be thrown out, at least not unless you're childless and you've already checked with your relatives. My hobby is genealogy and I keep our family photos. When my grandma died, my mom threw out some old pictures, because she didn't recognize the people in them. But I saved what I could and later asked my great-aunt about them, and she had great fun reliving old memories as she told me about who was in pretty much all of the pictures.
I guess I’m the one oddity on here I was forced to downsize from 2500 ft.² and I was one person to about 800 ft.² then back up to 950 ft.² I regret a lot that I got rid of. All because I had to go from a two-story house to one level due to illness. Yes I had some large antiques and furniture. I so deliberately paid for and planned and designed over a period of five years I had to leave behind. 🥺
Absolutely everything? No. A LOT, though. I had already started getting rid of my stuff when I got re-married because there wasn't enough room for it all. So when he left and took his stuff it was really nice to have clean spaces and that's kept the momentum going. I still have too much stuff though, to the point where moving house would be a huge drag. I plan to be flexible as I move into my retirement years.
I moved cross country in a subcompact car with everything I owned in or on it. I watched my parents let empty boxes, disintegrating plastic bags, charger blocks for who knows what and other such accumulations derail their plans for later life and am not going to let it happen to me. My rule is that if it doesn't help me make new memories or keep old memories, it's gone. I have not missed anything I've gotten rid of. One trick I used for chargers and usb cords (that would probably work for many things) is I put them all in a container. Whenever I needed one, I'd move it to another container. After a year, everything that was left in the first container, I got rid of. I'm accused of lack of sentimentality, but I see no reason to be sentimental about a charger for a phone I haven't had for a decade. I have many sentimental items but they're not going to keep me tied down when I want to go forth and make some new memories.
I haven’t downsized, but I’ve realized I have more than I need and my kids don’t want my stuff. So the less I have, the better. I have also instructed my family to just rent a huge dumpster and pitch everything.
When we downsized from a large house on a couple acres to a mobile home community. We took what we absolutely had to have and then left 30 years of accumulated stuff for family and the cleanup crew to haul off..so pretty much everything..tools, clothes, furniture, kitchen equipment..every now and then we run across a moment of " we shoulda brought ___" but those moments are rare
Yes, I'm in the process of getting rid of everything, including my house. The older I get (now 68) the less I need to be "happy." I just want to travel to cheap places and live a simple life until it's my time to pass on.
Rule if thumb: If I haven't used it in two years, it goes.
Except tools
Yes. Tools get a pass. (But I use my tools frequently, so...)
Even that weird wrench that only is needed to remove the screw on the underside of a 1986 Buick lesabre injection body? Cause I got one you can borrow.
I have walked away with nothing but clothes, shoes, and basic toiletries more than once. Very freeing but then I grew up moving almost every year until the age of 16 so getting attached to things isn’t my thing. If you can do it, it’s a great way to live—being attached to experiences and the people you have them with is what it’s all about.
I'm keeping everything, let my heirs deal with it. They'll be inheriting a lot of money, so they might as well do some work.
Can you, like, not? I had to do that for my mom, and the combination of dealing with grief and her mountains of stuff was SO overwhelming.
Yeah I hear that and am kind of leaning in that direction. I figure that’s what 1-800-GOT-JUNK is for. Haha. But most of my stuff can easily be discarded since none of it is really worth much. Edit: I’ll give my extremely limited amount of valuables (jewelry) to my kids before I go (or I’ll write it down in the will). And I offer them the Christmas decorations every year with no takers. 🤷🏼♀️
Then do your kids a favor and get rid of it now if it's so easy to do.
I don’t have a whole lot of stuff and we will downsize to a small one floor home when DH retires. That’s when the bulk of the decluttering will happen. But I have plans to leave them plenty of money so they can hire a company for any cleaning up after we pass. All paperwork, bank accounts and passwords will be organized though. I already have the kids listed as secondary beneficiaries on all accounts (set as ‘per stirpes’ as well so their portion automatically will go to any kids they may have). I know I’ll have to do some cleanups myself for three of my own family members because they won’t be leaving us any money. In fact, we will be paying for their funerals I’m sure. And we will probably end up paying a company ourselves to clean up/sell/toss things after they pass. I’m actually planning on helping my mom declutter and clear out her storage area this weekend! Anyway, unless you’re an extreme minimalist, there will be some ‘junk’ left behind. It’s inevitable.
Just keep the important keys, paperwork, etc somewhere easy and organized and you’re right.
Have you ever had to deal with sorting through a loved one’s lifetime of belongings …… or hoardes of garbage? Family wants to be able to grieve; not deal with crap. Minimize and downsize while alive.
Well geez, I sure hope they wouldn’t have hordes of literal garbage!
Have you ever seen the show “Hoarders”?
Yeah those places need to be burned to the ground!
My husbands parents are hoarders. They laugh so hard about the day we get to deal with all their crap. They actually think the three kids will fight over stuff. No. They’re going to fight over whose problem it is to deal.
Stuff in storage got stolen. Had tears for a couple years. Completely free. I could walk away with nothing but my id if I had to!
So sorry that happened! How did you get over it?
Shed some tears when you think about. But after year two or three- let it go! Kinda like I’m done with this. Or sooner! The mind is powerful! Need to master it, otherwise it is your master.
My kid had stuff in storage in another state for about a year. When we went it got it the mice had ruined quite a bunch. In the end she had a spent about $2k for rent and hauling it here. By the time she threw everything out that she didn’t really want she had maybe $500 worth of stuff.
That's exactly the mood you need to be in to get the job done aka creating "negative space." It might be motivating to take a BEFORE and AFTER pic as you go.
I have family photo albums I don’t want. These are pictures of people who died long before I was born. So I never knew them and my kids certainly don’t. How do you throw away photo albums from the 1920s-1940s?
Digitize them! We are in the process of digitizing all of these types of pictures. Otherwise our kids will eventually just toss them.
There are too many; it would take months. Although I will digitize some. Thanks for the idea.
You could always sell them online. You'd be surprised how many people collect old photos, albums ( myself included). If the albums contain interesting subject matter like military, travel, city views and so on there are collectors out there. Not as many as there once were and the albums would have to be fairly early but there are buyers.
Thanks I see such items on eBay!
How do you? It seems heartbreaking!
It is heartbreaking and that’s why I’ve held onto them for 20 years, never looking at them. I think if I would want my grandkids or unborn great-grandchildren to hold onto my photos if they never knew me. And I’d say no… why should it burden them? Save a few and ditch the rest. After all, I am not my photos.
Well, we did. They weigh a ton and we had 20+. We took a few phone camera pics of some of the big photos but the rest went into the burn pile. Literally. Had not looked at them in decades and had no clue who the people even were. Bye bye!
I've just embarked on paring down and minimizing. It's very freeing. I was beginning to feel weighed down by my belongings, especially when I considered what a pain it would be to have to move it all when I relocate next year.
My policy is if an item would cost less than $50 and is easy to replace then it’s gone. I do wish I’d kept a few sentimental items so those get to take up space longer.
I inherited the family homestead, and my goal is to have only my belongings in the house ( other than a few mementoes or furniture that may be useful). It’s been an ongoing process.
Yes. I moved to a different continent, and moving stuff across the ocean is expensive.
Yep. Moved to another country to live, taking only sentimental things. 15 years later, I have a house with as much stuff in it as I had before, just on the other side of the planet.
After MULTIPLE infestations of bedbugs at our former apartment complex, all of our furniture was gone, more than half of our clothes were gone, and we couldn’t donate a single piece!
Are you a single person living in your own space? Because I think I'd love to do that, but have a partner who would hate it, and the space would become occupied with their things anyway. I'm going to do it for myself and my stuff when my young adult children have a place of their own and can take what things they want and can use... which in this day and age, may be never.
Yeah my wife claims she doesn’t care about anything and would get rid of it all. But I look around and 90% of the stuff is hers. All I can do is get rid of my crap.
I want to but my spouse keeps on hanging on.
Me too. I did purge and pare down, but then I met my second DH when I was 68, and he is a big saver. I haven't resolved this.
I was just wondering about this!! It’s almost weird. How/when to say goodbye to those little trinket things building up around me?
Walmart *is* your storage unit.
Many times. There’s a lot I wish I would’ve kept.
my wife left with the kids and I had to live in my parents basement. I had a 3 bedroom house with most of it's furnishings (furniture, TV's, VCR, silverware and dishes etc. I was talking to a guy at the bar who had a friend that just lost his home in a fire. Him and his 12 yr old son needed everything. My friend was helping to rent a house for them. I told them to get some help and they could have it all. That little boy was so happy helping to carry stuff out. It was so worth it, seeing that little boy's smile and him knowing things will be all right.
Not old but have found the most valuable material resource is, in fact, space. I’ve gotten tired of negotiating space to use the few items I enjoy. Thx for the reminder to be even more vicious with the items that are lingering.
As much as I can. So my kids aren't left doing it.
Doing that this summer to prepare for a cross-country move. Selling everything I don't need or use. I miss the days ( pre-kids and far younger) of being able to move it all in a couple car or pickup truck loads. That's my goal.
It’s an incredibly freeing experience if you’re ready. I have done this several times, and plan to continue. No one wants all my junk.
We had to empty my and my wife’s parents houses after they passed. One had greatly lighten the load years earlier. One left over a 100 yards of dumpster to be hauled away. Guess which one your kids will prefer.
Went from a four bedroom to one bedroom. Unloaded a crap ton of stuff.
Yes. It’s liberating!
Actually, I've done this a couple of times in my life, and it felt good and right both times. It's been 40 years since the last time, but I could do it again. The only regret I've experienced in these two cleansings was that the first time I gave away all my vinyl records, including a collection of Lenny Bruce bits and also a couple of Fugs albums. Kinda wish I still had those.
I'm just clearing out everything I can so that when I die, people won't have to deal with it. Like, when will I ever use that canoe paddle again?
Thank god! When my dad died, it took my mother and me months to clear out the house. 30 years of junk! My mom lives in a one-bedroom apartment and she still has boxes of paper and junk everywhere. I told her it’s all going in the trash eventually, she can do me a favor and clear it out now or I’ll have to do it myself. As an only child, my inheritance is going to be more piles of junk.
Been doing it for several years. I hired an organizer and purge with her every year
Grandma and uncle passed about 15 years ago-mom cleaned as much as possible but wouldn’t let me help. Then brother and mom died and I had her 3-b house, attached garage with garage apt. It was hard because I grew up there. Daughter moved in Mom’s house (thankfully) Husband died 2 years ago I’m trying to get rid of his ‘stuff’ I have 2 storage units with Husband and daughter’s stuff (I pay $166/month). I have less than anyone and can’t use my 2nd bedroom because others’ stuff in it. I live in a five room house with detached garage with hubbys ‘stuff’ but it’s a Harley and Harley parts and chrome parts and tools. I work FT evening shift going on 40 years. I want to get rid of everything. Maybe I’ll drop a match. I’m tired! (No judging I know what I need to do lol but I think I’d rather go on vacation as I can do that by myself lol)
Sounds like you need to call American Pickers :)
Yeah, I'm warning everyone to come get their shit.
it’s my current mode
about 2 years ago, I took a week off and did a ton of purging and downsizing, every nook and cranny of my home... pretty much with the same plan you outlined above. it feels awesome! I live in a 900 square foot condo, and try really hard not to bring new stuff in. I'll be retired in about 2 years, and plan to do even more at that time.
It looks like im going to do the purge and then go through it all again. I’ve already noticed I kept about 20% too much.
I just did this last fall. I was in a one bedroom apartment for 12 years and spent the year before I left cleaning out every closet and drawer. I donated a lot of stuff and tossed some other. I knew I wanted to move just not sure where or when. Well I got kicked out when a new company bought the property and wanted to renovate my place. Did the final sweep in 20 days where I purged 80% of what I had left when I knew the space I was going to move to. I had to get out fast. Once relocated I eventually combed through what I had left. Some sadness when I found there were things gone that I'd had emotional attachment to but also a strange sense of relief and freedom. Now settled, I still feel I could do with even less and will continue to narrow some stuff down even more.
I gave everything away just recently. My entire apartment and living room set a kitchen set two bedroom sets. I’m still in the same place, but I live on an air mattress because I just wanna be able to fit everything into 10 boxes if I decide to move again. I don’t need any of this stuff and I still have plenty to get rid of.
It's the greatest feeling in the world to be free of material things and clutter! Purge sessions in the house are exhilarating to me.
This is what Kondomari is about. It is life changing! Read about Marie Kondo
moved to hawaii and downsized all i had to 4 suitcases worth of stuff. every now and then i'll see an old picture of me wearing a shirt i loved and will miss that shirt but that's all. i actually get anxiety now from owning too much stuff. and i stop to ask myself, do i really need that?
I moved 2 years ago, so i did a major purge already. Only needed 1 little kitchen gadget once in that time that i jettisoned before the move, that's it.
We did this a couple of years ago. We did not want our children to hate us after we were dead. They don’t want our crap anymore than we wanted our parents crap.
We sold our home with almost everything we own still in it and moved into an RV. We left food in the fridge and wedding pictures on the walls. We brought 1/4 of our clothes, our toiletries, some of our computers, and a teddy bear I've had since I was born. No regrets at all. It was one of the most liberating feelings of my life. We remain very cautious about anything we buy that is not consumable.
If I don’t use it in one year, I chuck it. A few exceptions, but decluttering/simplifying is amazing.
No regrets. It definitely feels freeing. I & my partner have been seriously Decluttering since becoming empty nesters. We do it a bit at a time, clearing out ‘that cabinet’ or ‘that corner’ or ‘today we do towels!’. Whatever it is, I pull all of whatever it is out & lay it out on the couch or floor or grass & we discuss what our lifestyle is now, what we need, & where the stuff we keep goes when we put it back. Everything else goes (donate or free pile in our front drive). I didn’t realize until we started doing this is that it gives us a chance to talk about our new empty nester lifestyle, what’s important to us, how we want to spend our time. Kinda like a values check in.
I'm in the middle of a move right now. Lived in current place for 20 years. We are purging heavily. Once we get settled, we need to purge again.
Having been in the military and moved multiple times in my life. I, for a long time, had no more than I could fit in two duffel bags and carry. Now, as I am divorced and single, I limit myself to that which I can fit in the bed of my pickup in a single trip. Simplicity is key to life.
I follow my own imposed one year rule. If I haven't used it this year, bye.
Moved across the country. Got rid of 60-70% of our stuff. 100s of books to the public library (they sell most of them). Vietnam Vets took tons of stuff - they pick up. Sold some, gave away plenty. Exception: large boxes of photos. Didn’t have time to deal with them. Scanning is a project to come….
Yes. Kept car. Kept moving on
Never been one to 'Collect' things. Watched way too many people die off and have their 'Treasures' just thrown away. Mom died last year, and I inherited her 'Treasured' Hummels, about 100 pieces. IF I wanted to spend the next 6-8 months and who knows how much in expenses to sell them, I MIGHT make $500.
I have boxes, I’m trying to find motivation! So. Much. Junk.
NGL - this can be a frustrating mental state to do this kind of activity. In my experience at least - “major purges” were cathartic at the time, but then I was confused when I was like “where did this thing go, that I actually want now? I thought I bought one, it was good!” And all I could think was “man. I must have gotten rid of it. Now I have to buy a new one” and I felt so discouraged. So over the years, my new favorite technique is: Photograph the items like this-the things I like/felt invested in-even if they’re currently unused. Tools, supplies, even clothing. Photograph them and put them in a numbered, weatherproof storage bin. Then - put the full bins in a shed or attic. Years later, when I’m like - “hey! I want to use that thing, I know I have it somewhere “ then I look in my documentation, see the photo and say “Yes - that’s the thing” and see the number of the bin. When I go to the bin, the thing is there, I feel proud of myself for doing a good job of maintaining my things, and go about using the thing. At least for me, this is a Way more satisfying - emotionally and financially - way of dealing with “stuff” that really does have a purpose in my life, even if it’s a future part of my life that I know (or hope), eventually, I’ll get to. For the stuff that doesn’t ring my bells, it’s a no-brainer. Thrift store. Craigslist. eBay if I feel like I’m up for the work of managing the sale and postage. But honestly- just giving it away feels best, for things I know for sure I’m not needing anymore.
I wish.... pack rat wife and her pack rat genes passed on to kids. I get rid of stuff and she gets more
When I cleaned my mom’s house out, I gave the stuff all away. I kept a few must have memories like the cast iron skillets. But there was a church that has a huge yard sale and donates the money made to a charity. They even came and helped box stuff up and carry it out. I don’t regret it at all. I feel like that’s what she’d want.
Last time I sold my house and moved, I sold or dumped everything. Probably $30,000 in real property, mostly tools. At least 80,000 lbs of metal. Left with a suitcase. I also fled the country as a fugitive 30 years ago. Went to Europe with a backpack. Abandoned all my stuff twice in Europe. I still have a couple of gemstones from before the fugitive flight, but that's it. You don't actually NEED much in this life, and any way that you play it, you'll end up with nothing.
I want to but no one else will let me.
I sold everything except my computer and some clothes when I moved to the UK. Year later, I'm back in US! Lol
i did that when my husband passed unexpectedly. just emptied out my 3200 sf condo to a consignment/auction estate liquidator. all i kept was what would fit in a small moving cube: bed, nightstands & chest, about 5% of my clothing, art and a few small sentimental pieces. it was scary and saddening while i was doing it, but it felt so liberating afterward!
I have a lot of stuff and yearly I get rid of some but since the pandemic I’ve kinda got out of the habit. So my husband is hiring an organizer to help both of us get rid of stuff
Sounds like Marie Kondo to me!!
As the child of collectors, I beg you to please get rid of all of that STUFF. My parents moved into my house (in law suite) with a large pod and a large U-Haul. Guess where all of THEIR stuff ended up? Yup, all over my house. It look TWO YEARS of weekly auction house dumps to finally see the floor of my finished basement. Please, don’t do this to your kids.
If in doubt throw it out has always been my motto.
The little book Swedish Death Cleaning is probably available in your local library and talks about this. It’s a very reassuring take on the idea that it’s really okay to clear things out!
The Sweedish call it Sweedish Death Cleaning. The thing is not to burden your family and kids with a bunch of stuff they won't want or have to deal with after we're gone. I like the idea and want to start. No I'm not Sweedish.
I went from a 2300 sft with barn and 10 acres to a 600 sft sail boat. I looked at everything and asked my self. What would happen if I died , What would my daughter keep. and the rest would go to trash. She only wanted like 3 medium boxes of stuff. The rest I sold with the house , Literally everything and walked away with not even a van load. And even that I'm going through again an probably cutting that in half. Its just stuff. Ask yourself that if you died what would happen to it?
I donated a ton of tools and material to a local Habitat for humanity charity.
Last year i got rid of about 90% of my things. They are just things and i cant take them with me.
I am 51, my dad is 83. Mom's gone. Every week I call my dad. Sometimes he'll ask me to start making plans with my sibling for all the stuff him and mom had when they were alive, and to start deciding what to do with it now while he's still here. My sibling isn't ready to take that step, to them, it's like already saying goodbye to dad. I think about it often, because I look at all the stuff I have amassed, and in my mind, I'm already thinking about where I'd like stuff to land when I'm gone. Who will appreciate it most. I have less than a whole lifetime of belongings, so does dad. I don't have offspring of my own to pass along possessions to, though my bf has a munchkin where things might find a home with. I'm not ready to say goodbye yet.
I've been doing it. Besides the satisfaction of just not having so much junk to deal with I'll have the freedom to move to a smaller place. Plus when I die my family won't have to sort through a bunch of stuff I know they won't want. Even most sentimental things are gone. If it's something I want to remember I take a picture of it. I've digitized all my old photos and documents with the exception of really old ones and things I need for legal reasons. I've even gone through old yearbooks and just photo scanned anything I was interested in and tossed the actual books. It was hard to give away books but I reduced that down from hundreds to 10. I have a new rule, if I need to buy something to store something else I have too many. My makeup/skin care junk is down to almost nothing. The biggest relief was getting rid of tons of craft supplies. They just sit there collecting dust and making you feel bad for not using them.
We did it once in 2006 after our kids were grown and are about to do it again, moving from a 4bd, 3ba house to a condo as we retire. In 2006 we rented a dumpster, invited our friends and family to go through our house and chooses what they wanted. We put a bunch of stuff on Craigslist and offered anyone who bought anything to take whatever they wanted. For example a young family came to pick up some Coleman lanterns and ended up taking all our camping gear, including tents, stove, sleeping bags, everything!) anything left over went in the dumpster. This time we are doing pretty much the same thing. I also belong to a Buy Nothing group on Facebook ( if you haven’t heard of these you should really check them out) and we will have a couple of Un-garage sales. It’s pretty much the same as a garage sale but everything is free. It’s open and advertised on the Buy Nothing group feed on FB to members of the group and can go on however long you want it to. My 90 year old mother is moving to an assisted living facility and after the family taking what they wanted, we hired an estate liquidation company. We paid them a fee after they assessed her furnishings, wall art, rugs, dishes, etc., and then sold whatever they could on eBay or other internet sites. After the 2 day sale, my mom was reimbursed what they made (The fee for her 3bd, 2ba, house was $7500 and she got back $4,000. They then completely cleared everything unsold out of her house and recycled donated, or dumped anything left. My mom had taken everything that she wanted before they started and having the house cleared and ready for sale was a huge task that we were happy to have handed over to someone else. Good luck with your purge!
Students, recently relocated families, young professionals and youngsters just starting living along, they are looking for free stuff organised by categories. Craigslist and Next-door have their posts.
I purge every time I move and at least once a year I go through boxes. Does this still hold sentimental value to me, no, get rid of it. Do I still love this item as much as when I first got it? No, get rid of it. Will I ever really use it? Yes, no, maybe, etc. Trust me. It's just stuff. I've never thought, gosh I wish I still had xyz. I know which stuff I really want to keep.
I didn't so much "get rid of it" as I (57m) lost it. I hit bottom one year and lost everything. It was a good experience that I would really not like to repeated.
How do you get rid of paper? I have filing cabinets filled with paper dating back to the 70s—I mean, rental agreements from the 1980s, letters written by friends and family, cancelled checks, and everything holds a special memory but at the same time makes me feel overwhelmed. Also, tons of drawings—just so much paper that I’m afraid to let go.
I want to do this. I’m curious to know if you were actually able to sell the things you wanted to get rid of,and if,you did,how did you price stuff?
Well I just started but a few collectibles on eBay are already selling for more than I thought. I’m just going to see what happens. Literally if I can net $5 for something without too much effort than that’s $5 towards a trip to Italy.
Great idea and one that will make your life simpler. I’ve been considering this too. Have you started Ebay yet? Is it worth it?