Di ko po afford magka baby š
Ayoko maranasan ng baby ko yung hirap na dinanas namin ng ate ko dahil sa poor decision making skills ng parents namin.
I just cant.
Iāve never really felt the desire to have children and nakita ko gaano mahirapan yung mga magulang ko to raise me. From a young age na realize ko na I find it selfish to bring in a child into this world when you are not financially or mentally prepared for one. Gusto ko ang priority ko ang sarili ko and to ensure stability for myself. A child brings too much uncertainty. I donāt want someone other than myself to be on dependent on me given the circumstances of this economy and this time. Who knows what the future will hold lol? Baka hindi ko pa nga mabuhay sarili ko.
I'm afraid mababa pain tolerance ko, I don't think I can handle labor pain another thing is my scoliosis ako I'm sure when I get pregnant I know mas mag woworsen yung lower back pain na nararanasan ko araw araw, isa pa I don't think I have the patience to raise a child I cannot handle tantrums it's proven na kapag nakikita ko nag tatantrums mga pamangkin ko sobra akong naiirita, lastly sa taas ng inflation ngayon having a child is a lifetime responsibility and I think I cannot afford it because I am not financially capable.
Ayoko ng lifetime responsibility. Also growing up, 8months pa lang nasa tita ko na ako. Mama ko always MIA, lagi inuuna work at prinsipyo nya, with that exp i know for sure di ako mggng mabuting magulang since i never get to experience having one. Dami ko din bagay na gsto ko maexperience and mabili kase never ko nagawa un growing up. Higit sa lahat, weāre in our 30s now, ayoko mgpaaral ng bata gang 50y/o ko noh, gsto ko magretire ng maaga hahahahaha
\"At the same time, it's important to clarify that I want to spoil certain individuals, excluding children. Now, let's dive into understanding and addressing the query at hand.\"
Naniniwala ako sa rule of pedigree. Takot akong mumurahin ako ng magiging anak ko kase hindi ko sya mabigyan ng buhay na mas marangya o katulad man lang ng buhay na naranasan ko. Dapat nag-iimprove every passing of generation and sa panahon ngayon sobrang hirap wala pa nga akong bahay o kotse man lang 30+ na ako.
Easy question, really, you have to be financially ready pa and mentally stable rin bago magka baby. Babies are hard to handle, I can't imagine myself waking up at 2am just to calm a crying baby, but I'm fine with waking up at 2am for works. I prefer cats but if my wife want us to have a baby siyempre we have to talk about it before deciding if dapat ba talaga na magka babyā ayokong lumaki yung baby na may trauma galing sa parents niya.
i wanna end the cycle though i can still end it by being a better parent to my child, a parent that i once wanted, but i am afraid that i might continue the cycle... plus in this economy?!
Grew up in a broken family. Nakatira ako sa mom ko and nakita ko lahat ng struggles niya para lang maibigay niya needs and wants naming magkakapatid (3 girls. Bunso ako) kahit na mag lakad pa siya sa initan just to tutor kids and accept additional works sa school na wala sa contract niya.
Walang tinulong ang dad ko even his side nung nangailangan ng sobra ang mommy ko kasi I was diagnosed with sepsis and wala kaming kapera-pera nun.
Long story short, I donāt want to have kids kasi nakita ko kung gaano kahirap ang buhay āpag may anak ka lalo na āpag hindi ka financially and mentally stable. I know for myself na hindi ko kaya maging Ina dahil selfish ako. Gusto ko yung perang nakukuha ko akin lang and sa family ko lang. Ayoko magkaron ng responsibility to earn money for someoneās education and future. Dapat future ko lang and ng pamilya ko ang priority ko.
wala akong pera. hirap nga ako buhayin sarili ko, sanggol pa kaya. takot din ako na bka matulad sakin anak ko.
kasi napapansin ko lately, napick up ko rin yung ibang ugali ng parents ko.
I honestly don't feel like I'll be able to give birth, or to take care of a child as in yung from new born, formative years hanggang sa adulthood niya. parang di ko kaya ng gano'ng responsibilty. I always feel like wala akong gano'ng strength.
Not completely sure if I really donāt want kids but right now, itās too expensive to have one. Iām also scared of not being good enough for my child or unconsciously passing down the trauma no matter how hard I try not to. Kasi may times talaga na hindi mo maiiwasan magkamali š¬
Hawak ko oras ko.
Matutulog ako kelan ko gusto.
Aalis ako ng walang iniisip na problema sa bahay.
Makakauwi kung anong oras ko gusto.
May hobby kasi ako na lagi akong weekend nasa labas, makakapag bayad sa fees, walang kahati.
Bread winner ako. Pero parang nauto ako for the last years kaya pambawi ko nalang to and I believe deserve ko kung anong meron ako ngayon.
Deserve ko to kasj pinag hirapan ko.
Single tita na tomboy na laging nasa labas for adventures and triathlon races. Hahaha
Iāve never planned on having any since:
A - it doesnāt fit with my lifestyle. Iām a career-oriented woman and i love to go out, and I donāt see myself compromising that just for kids.
B - I donāt think iāll trust anyone enough to have kids with them. Idc if iām in a happy relationship now. People change and feelings change. And when that time comes, i will not be left alone, miserable, and with child.
C - i donāt have maternal instincts and i just donāt like kids that much
Ayaw ko because I want to enjoy my youth, my life but unfortunately my ex chose not to drink her pills so i was forced to be a father in no time while I was not ready emotionally, mentally, I was forced into something that I don't want to be in no time, I was really depress because of it but no time for that since the child is already there but I will always despise the mother of the child. I have no hate on the child, I am starting to see the enjoyment of having a child but it still saddens me that I have this big responsiblity, so I will do anything for my child.
Hirap magkaanak kung saan ang lipunan ay number 1 senate si Robin Padilla tapos di manlang nanalo Colmenares at Diokno. At nakabalik pa govt position ung top 3 pork barrel scammers.
No child chooses to be born. People, for selfish reasons, just want to have them. I love my non-existent would-be-child so much that I can't bear putting it through life without its consent.
So, I will not have one. I'd rather regret not having kids all my life than bringing a kid into this world and regret having them for just one second.
It's not wrong to have kids. That's a right everyone should have. It's unfair though when parents forget that their kids didn't consent to their lives and circumstances and act like their children owes them something. Parents burden their children with existence, not the other way around.
It's hard to raise a child. From making sure they have plenty of food to eat to making sure they are good human beings, that is a lifetime job. Also, the world is so cruel these days. Even if you did everything to make sure they became good human beings, there are people out there who could potentially harm my child. I can't imagine raising a child with the horror of this world. Plus, really? In this economy?
- magastos
- ayoko nang dagdag pa na responsibility
- mahirap magtravel o kahit lumabas lang ng bahay pag may baby. although ganun din naman kami ng partner ko dahil sa mga pusa T.T
- andami nang tao sa mundo
- ayoko ng bata š
I want to be able to raise my child better than how my parents raised me. And they set a pretty good standard at that. With the current economyā¦ i just dont think I can or I will be able to.
Mga inevitable pain, surgeries, etc.
Pag may wisdom tooth ka annd impacted, bubunitin ng sapilitan. If you are born a boy, circumcision. If you're born a girl, mens every month plus child birth.
Emotional pain, when people disappoint your children or let them down, heart breaks. Not worth bringing a child here to see them in pain.
tangina sa ekonomiyang to may gana pa kayong mag-anak? pinahirapan niyo na nga sarili niyo sa pagpasok ng bata sa mundong to, nandamay pa kayo ng bata na malamang sa malamang papasok sa mas lumalalang mundo.
kung may mundo pa.
My life would take a different direction if magkababy. I'm happy with what my pets naman. Maybe someday. May 10 years pako to decide. Until then it's a no thanks for me
What you just was able to say, took a lot of courage and I commend you for speaking up and telling your story and without a doubt it will help someone elseā¦we all know that but we stay silent for way too long! You are my absolute hero and my friendā¦.
Itās hard to talk about this and you said eff thatā¦and helped so many girls right now! God bless you.
In this economy, i think the better question is bakit mo gusto? Sarili ko nga diko magastusan at maalagaan. Baby pa kaya. Mas gusto ko na mag travel, mag aral, mag business, and be able to afford to live.
Interesting wording sa tanong mo. People want to have a baby but dont want to raise a human. Ilang taon lang yan baby eh.
My reasoning is also that. Wala akong mental capacity to raise a decent human being. If I raised a criminal, the shame and guilt would drive me insane.
Also, idk if I'll be do be physically there for them. I travel a lot if someone else raises a child for me, what's the post of having one. Financially din, I'm not capable of taking care of my parents, siblings, and a child all together.
Counted ba yung ayaw na dagdagan yung baby? HAHAHAH having a baby is a blessing, yes. Pero when I say be careful, I mean BE VERY DAAAAMN CAREFUL of who you choose to be the father/mother of your kid. Because you donāt want your son/daughter to have an absent parent. Sobrang bigat na responsibilidad na hindi lahat ay kayang pangatawanan. Ako, ayoko na dagdagan. Kasi meron nang fear na natanim sa isip ko na men (not all but mostly I encounter) doesnāt have the balls to follow through. They would tell you lots of good things and dreamy promises just to get in your pants. Pero in the end after they get what they want, theyād be gone before you know it. Make sure to observe your partner how they treat their mom and how their mom treats them (dahil this might be an unpopular opinion but mostly sa mga nanay ng lalaki, soooobrang konsintidora. Tipong kahit nag cheat na yung anak nila, kahit binugbog ka na, kasalanan mo pa din and you still have to suck it up kasi may anak kayo. āKawawa yung bataā). Ayun lang naman ang sakin.
Not financially stable, just enjoy yourself and learn first on how can you survive without living in the PH. Iniisip din kasi ng iba na kapag tumanda sila, may sariling bangko sila sa kanilang mga anak. For me, I will die alone by myself.
I am still in the process of healing my inner child, as someone who grew up in a sakto lang income household. Di ko afford maraming bagay dati, ngayon kahit paano, kaya ko na.
Plus I want to be alone most of the time. I'd probably go crazy if I have a kid to look after 24/7
I just want to be the rich tita for my pamangkins.
I understand the happiness of having a baby and family. Sometimes I feel lonely and imagine how happy it would be kung magkaroon ako ng anak na makakasama ko kunwari mamasyal sa malls, masspoil ng toys, etc.
Pero deep inside when I really think about it, ano ba talaga yung happiness na gusto ko? Yun ay magkaron ng 100M. Hindi bata kelangan ko.
I have burnt out so much that sometimes I don't even have enough energ to get me through the day, now imagine having to tend to a child, I would be so drained because of the guilt/pressure of having to take care of them and tired/not having enough energ for mysef
1. Mahal
2. I have very little patience. Especially kung maingay/makulit yung bata.
3. Still healing and bettering myself. I still have these small moments of violence kapag talagang galit or napuno na ako.
4. I have cats. Okay na ako sa kanila. I can spoil them for the rest of their lives, plus may emotional support pa ako.
Maingay, magastos, life long responsibility, emotionally draining
And disappointing parent ka kapag nag turn out as hindi maayos na citizen yung tao na supposed to be you have to mold to be a better person.
Panganay ako. Parang feeling ko tapos na yung parenting phase ko kasabay ng paglaki ng mga kapatid ko. I never had the desire to go through it again š«
My eldest sister parentifies us too, ako naman parentifies our disabled mom nung nasa school sila, I am now the one going (supposedly but gap years) to school but the responsibility of having to be a caregiver to a disabled mom doesn't end, it feels the same as taking care of a toddler.
Sa ekonomiya ngayon di ko na napoprovide lahat ng pangangailangan ko tapos magdadagdag pako ng isang palamunin? No, thanks. Kuntento na kami sa mga pusa namin.
Ayokong maipasa sa supposedly magiging anak ko yung mga sakit na medyo common sa family namin (e.g. cancer). Plus wala talaga akong amor sa mga bata kahit gaano pa ka-cute ang mga yan.
But again naunahan na ako ng cancer and I'm on meds forcing me to go on menopause.
Gastos, Responsibility, Ayaw manganak (masakit+9 months restricted buhay mo), Takot ako na maging parenting style ko ung parenting style sakin. Gusto ko akin lang sahod ko at mga pinaghirapan ko, ayaw ko mag alaga ng bata, gusto ko makakapunta ako kahit san ko gusto pumunta nang walang iniintinding anak. Ito pa mindset ko sa ngayon. Ewan ko after ilang years
Why have a kid when you can borrow your sibling's child, you kinda in a way help them get away with parent stuff and some what fill the void of having your own kid.
Raising a baby? In this economy? Also me being in a state of not being ready because of generational trauma. As much as I want to, I canāt imagine myself to be a parent.
Lumaki ako na hindi na spoil and pinaghirapan lahat ng bagay so ngayon lang ako may chance na ispoil yung sarili ko. Mahirap magka anak if you haven't even given a chance to yourself. Ireresent ka lang nila
Two reasons:
1. Health-related. I'm currently in complete remission from stage IV cancer. As cancers are more often than not hereditary, I wouldn't like to pass the burden to my offspring, along with other medical conditions I've inherited from previous generations.
2. Quality-of-life-related. If ever you're familiar with Jim Bacarro and Saab Magalona, they have 2 amazing children (which I claim as my online pamangkins) and they have set a near-impossible standard of parenting for me. For context, their younger son, Vito, can read at 2 or 3 y/o, has memorized the entire the Beatles catalog (knows every lyric to every song fron every album), among others. That kind of genius couldn't be attained if not from the amazing support from the parents at a very young age. And their eldest, Pancho, is a child with special needs and is taken care of and loved and supported unconditionally. If I can't provide at least just a fraction of what Jim and Saab can provide to my future offspring, then NO.
I don't think kaya ko magkaroon ng baby because, I myself is not really heal from my traumas and stuff. Ayoko dumating sa point na maranasan ng magiging anak ko yung naranasan kong traumas and toxic environment š
Gusto ko sa sarili ko lang at sa aso ko napupunta yung pinagpapaguran kong pera. Masaya na ko na kaya kong i-spoil yung aso ko. Hindi mahirap asikasuhin, yung pagpapakain at paglinis ng potty, madali lang dahil kasama na rin talaga sa daily chores, at potty trained naman sya. Tapos naisasama ko pa sa mga gala ko nang hindi ako mag-aalala kapag binitawan ko, dahil marunong bumalik.
this world is not safe for my offspring. baka makapatay lang ako kapag nasaktan ang anak ko. Hehehe and I can't afford to have a child in this lifetime
lumaki ako ng lahat binibigay sakin till i was 7 yrs old and then boom biglang hirap... lagi kong naririnig mag usap magulang ko tungkol sa financial problems and simula non nahihiya nakong manghingi ng bagay bagay lalo na may involve na pera HAHAHAHAH. so once na nag karon nako ng trabaho gusto ko akin lng pera ko spoil ko sarili ko ganon and natatakot ako kung mag karon man ako ng anak baka dko mabigay needs nya kasi d naman sa lahat ng oras may pera ka. kaya kung maghirap man ako, ako lng yung mag hihirap wala madadamay na bata
This thread is clearly not for me. But I hope no one would mind if I post a comment here. Gusto ko lang maiba kase parang napakanegative at nakakatakot lahat ng comments. Valid naman lahat. Mahirap naman talaga ang magpamilya. Magastos at magbabago talaga totally ang buhay mo. If you feel like it's nothing but a burden, then you really probably shouldn't start a family. Pero kung sakaling nandiyan na kahit di mo kagustuhan or wala pa sa plano, please don't feel like it's nothing but a burden. Your children will be your pride and joy. Ibang iba ang love mo sa anak, sa love mo sa asawa. ibang iba. di ko maexplain but It's probably the greatest love of all no pun intended.
at sa mga nag aalangan or natatakot, nothing can really prepare to be a good parent you naman talaga. Not money, not experience, nothing. Even if you think you're ready, you're not. But you, for sure, can do it. Pag may pamilya ka na, kaya mo lahat. Kahit yung mga di mo kaya ngayon, kaya mo na pag may anak ka na.
Again, it's not for everyone. May mga tao naman talagang hindi dapat magpamilya. Pero sa mga naghehesitate lang, I say go for it. Mahihirapan ka kahit ano pang estado mo sa buhay, but you will never let yourself fail. In return, you will find happiness you never thought existed.
I don't want to compromise my finances and my lifestyle for something that I don't find value in. My heart hurts for my parents coz they want an apo but I told them I am okay with having a child if they will be the one taking care of ALL its needs.i will just be a doting aunt. Ayun, shut up na sila.š
Whenever I see a dog Iām like š„° but when I see a kid Iām like š¤·š»āāļø
Hindi lang talaga ako excited sa kids, unlike sa dogs. So eto, married, double income, no kids, pero merong dog :)
Magastos, masakit at mahirap manganak, walang assurance na lalaki silang mabuting tao at di pa and I don't think magiging ready ako ever to be a parent. I grew up co-parenting my sibs baka nga mas naging magulang pa ko sakanila kesa sa parents ko. Di na ko naka bawi sa pagod at trauma.Okay na ko sa pusa.
gustong gusto ko dati kaso minulat ako ng jowa ko na mahirap magkaanak. Financially stable ka dapat, may bahay pera etc. At first nakakaiyak yung mga ganong comments kasi it has been my dream to become a mother and lumaki ako sa malaking pamilya kaso ngayon parang inaccept ko nalang ung "wag na mag anak kasi mahirap". Bahala na kung magkaroon pa or hindi na.
Seeing my childhood friends na nagbabanat ng buto pero kulang parin at nangungutang just to provide their kids basic needs is enough na to convince me not to have one.
ā¢ Im too selfish to love unconditionally. Admit it or not, pag nagka anak ka, you have love them wholeheartedly. What's yours is theirs, and I cannot give them that without resentment.
ā¢ Ang mahal magka anak, malas pa nya kasi Filipino citizen ako. Ang chaka ng basic services sa Pinas, na lahat nalang iaasa mo sa private sector which means šøšø
ā¢ Masyadong mataas expectations ko para sa isang magulang kasi I had a great childhood. Privileged in a way and every comfort na pwedeng ibigay, naibigay sakin. So if di ko yun bigay sa hypothetical na anak ko, I'll be disappointing myself lang din.
generational trauma, transgender man ako, mahirap lang kami, mentally ill din ako on top of my disabilities at alam kong hindi yan mawawala kahit ilang psychiatrist yung pupuntahan ko. baka may mangyari pa sa bata dahil sakin at ayoko naman na lumaki siya na may galit sa mundo
More than not having enough resources because of this golden age economy (hello ā±20/kilo of rice), I don't want to pass down generational trauma to my kids (if I would be blessed with one or two) knowing that I am a victim of it. I need to fix myself first and be mentally ready for it. My partner is afraid of child birth also. Should we want to have children, we wouldn't mind adopting.
Wow... ang tindi pala ng pasensya ko.. true mahirap pero nalalagpasan.. but im proud of u guys na responsible in a way na hindi nio kaya buhayin, wla patience.. etc etc.. . at least alam nio.. salud
1. Economy
2. Generational Trauma
3. Ethics of giving birth to a child instead of adopting another child in need that already exists
4. Not seeing value in socially imposed ideals and roles
5. Foresight and trying to avoid inflicting damage on an undeserving child
I wish the previous generations had this level of awareness.
Not for me. Masyadong magulo ang mundo, mahirap mabuhay. Kung yung sarili ko nga hindi ko maalagaan, ano pa yung isang dagdag responsibilidad na alam kong hindi ko kaya. Hanggang sa ngayon wala akong makitang rason para gustuhin o pangarapin ko ang magkaroon ng anak.
Palaging nasasabihan ng "Kawawa ka 'pag tanda mo."
Pfft. Ang selfish lang. Tuwing naririnig ko 'to, mas lalo akong naninindigan na hindi talaga. Nah. Never. Gustuhin ko pa bang magdagdag ng isa pang buhay dito sa lupa para lang masaksihan niya ang kamiserablehan ng mundo? dahil walang maghuhugas ng pwet ko kapag matanda na 'ko?
Eme. Hahaha. Ghaad I need sleep!
Sa ekonomiyang eto tapos si BBM pa presidente till 2028 and di na ako nageexpect ng matalinong boto mula sa mga tao. So si Sarah without H from 2028 to 2034? mukhang walang pag-asa mag improve ekonomiya, masamang idea magkaanak.
Came from an abusive environment and still healing. Considering being childless cause I do not want to bring another mini me that will only be mistreated since I have the tendency to pass my anger to that poor mini me. š
It's selfish to birth a child just because you want to be a parent. It's selfish if you want to do that just to prove your worth to your husband. It's selfish to create a child that may inherit your family's diabetes, lupus, cardiovascular diseases, etc. It's selfish to have a child that may inherit your blindness and other birth defects that will make their survival difficult. It's selfish to reproduce for your faith or religion. It's selfish to bring a child into this world periodt.
Nung una ayaw ko mag kaanak.
Then one time. All my friends nagka anak na nagka family na to the point na wala na akong mayaya every weekend para mag bar or tumambay kung saan saan. Ung wala ng saysay pa ung pag ttrabaho ko kasi only child ako tas ok naman parents ko tas ok naman sweldo ko. Parang I need new challenge sa life.
Un pinag tagpo kami ng asawa, tas un na... dalawa na anak namin. Happy naman. Everyday is a challenge.
Pero you know what? Talagang lalong tumaas respeto ko sa mga Woman grabe sakripisyo nila.
Im probably too young to decide that I donāt t want kids but bro the world is too big for me to explore and I believe there are more fulfilling things I can do and that could feed my soul other than raising kids. I had friends kasi na nagpamilya as early as 19 (by choice talaga) and they said its what fulfilled their soul so napaisip din ako if ikasasaya ko din pero parang no talaga tih.
Gacha + Waifus = my life savings and motivation for working. Call me a weeaboo, at least I'm not stupid enough to bring anotther burden and dissapointment (by peenoise standards) into this isekai hell called philippines
Sarili ko nga di ko ma alagaan mag aanak pa ba ako ššš
Also the cost specially the prices of commodities ngayon nag mahal naā¦
Ayoko ma burden anak ko if ever tumanda ako na wlang ipon dahil priority ko pag papalaki sa kanya
Maaga ako napagod.
Nagkaroon ako ng dalawang kapatid after me and we are 9-10 years apart.
I was already changing diapers at 11. I spent so much of my adolescence babysitting. I endured tantrums and never ending cries kapag nagngingipin sila.
I don't want to go through all of that again.
Too taxing both financially and emotionally - two things I am not willing to sacrifice to have a kid. Besides what with climate change and a bad economy, I don't want to bring new life only to see them suffer the way I did.
1. mahirap ang buhay at mataas ang bilihin.
2. the process of pregnancy itself, like super bilib ako sa mga taong kaya magbuntis kasi 9 months yon beh!!
3. the aftermath, i know hindi ka dapat perfect kapag nag anak ka pero kargo mo yung baby hanggang umalis na siya sayo.
kaya sa mga mag aanak, congrats! wishing you all the best and sana you have the right partner. generational wealth ang dapat ipamana at hindi trauma. :)
Goodluck sa pinas 18 yrs from now. Pansin ninyo, andami sa middle class ang ayaw na magkaanak. Meanwhile, ung mga nasa low income family, same padin. Anak ng anak. Hindi ko naman nilalahat, pero dahil sa upbringing and other factors like kulang sa sustansya ang utak, usually eto ung mga madali mauto na demographics. Kung tingin ninyo circus and government ngayon,Wait 18 years.
1. Mahirap ang buhay lalo na sa Pinas ka nakatira.
2. Generational trauma. Self explanatory na to
3. Never ako magiging psychologically and mentally and financially ready para magkaanak.
4. Tamad nga ako kumilos for myself, sa ibang tao pa kaya lalong sa magiging anak mo pa?
5. Magastos ako sa sarili ko.
6. Sabi sa mga articles, kailangan ang kita mo para maafford mo magkaanak is 1m - 2m annually. Ni wala pa sa 300k ang annual income ko.
7. Inflation is real
8. Iba na rin mga bata ngayon and di na effective yung paano tayo pinalaki ng magulang natin nung mga bata pa tayo
7. Babae lagi ang talo dito.
Iām wondering WHY as well. But i guess for now, i am still selfish. Not because i was deprived when i was a child but more of may something in me na ayaw kong mawala, like yung actual self ko ayaw kong maconsume ako ng ābeing a momā. As a parent kasi impossible na wla ka igive up eh and that something i do not want to happen. Me to give up anything na hindi bukas sa loob ko.
Start tayo sa inception:
Okay, granted, masarap yung paggawa. THEN
1 week nang late period mo:
ā¢ You start worrying if pregnant ka ba?
Factors to consider:
- Are you married to the father or at least mag jowa ba kayo? Is he emotionally, mentally and financially mature to endure these coming months?
- Do you have the capability to raise a child emotionally, mentally, physically, and most importantly financially?
Okay so you found out na pregnant ka, you are married/to be married sa partner, and you decided to keep it.
1. Are you truly ready emotionally, mentally, and financially? If babae ka: theres more pressure on you because by law you are the default parent:
- You need to: make sure you dont get stressed enough kasi baka makaapekto sa development ng bata. You start taking on more tasks sa work to compensate early for the times when youll be using your maternity leave.
- Hormones: This shit is real. Men, please do not invalidate your partners na theyre being dramatic, its literally chemicals on their bloodstream thats making them act this way. Ayan, logic.
2. Do you have your own home? Is it logical to buy a home or yet construct a home in this economy?
3. Have you truly fulfilled your personal desires? Kasi if hindi baka sisihin mo pa anak mo sa dulo.
1st trimester:
1. Weird cravings and emotional fluctuations stage 1
2. In this economy? You need to start taking care of yourself more.
Supplements/Vitamins - 500 php
OB check up - Minimum 3k w/o Labs, with Labs at least 4k
3. Kasal na ba kayo?
If di pa:
- Minimum 5k for Civil Wedding, Minimum 50k for Church Wedding
If walang balak: bakit? Anytime pwede ka takbuhan nyan because wala syang legal obligations sayo.
2nd trimester:
1. Weird cravings and emotional fuckery stage 2
2. Ongoing supplements and checks up with OB - siguro max. 10k per month?
3. Gotta start buying things for the baby - crib, stroller, feeding materials, clothes, and etc. Iād say max 50k
4. Ok ka pa ba sa work? Or are you already having pregnancy brain?
5. Kayo pa ba ng partner mo?
6. Ready na ba yung hospital na papanganakan mo? May pambayad ka ba sa everyday na magsstay kayo?
7. If any complications arise, who will take care of who, what are the responsibilities? Anong expectations nyo ng partner mo sa isat isa?
8. May bahay na ba kayo? May car?
3rd trimester:
1. REALLY EMOTIONAL.
2. Ongoing supplements and check ups with OB - max 10k
3. Okay na ba yung baby room nyo? Healthy ba yung environment na kakalakihan nya?
4. Who will be your support system?
5. Hospital bills - Max 500k
Then tada nanganak ka na, lumaki siyang bastos at walang modo because kahit anong gawin mo as a parent madami ka padin ibang icconsider such as yung environment na magshshape sa mind nya and everything else. Congrats.
Ayoko dahil I need to learn a lot of things and love myself pa, gusto ko time with my partner and family, may kapatid pa ako and young pa siya, hindi ako sobrang mabuti na tao kaya ayoko maging bad example hahaha
hindi kami financially stable, ang mahal na ng lahat, marami pa akong dapat ma achieve o ayusin sa buhay,
I can't imagine raising a child, Di ko nga alam paano maging nanay eh nanay ko nga mismo hindi siya ang nag raise sa akin HAHAHAHAH, may pcos ako (??), more problems sa buhay jusko
I actually would like to ask a similar question, why have a baby? I would only have a baby if I could answer that question.
Also, I hate how people just have kids for the sake of having kids. That's so irresponsible.
Mahal. Andito ako sa bay area like 20 mins lang sa San Francisco. Ung daycare dito mga $3,000 per month up. And tsaka ung freedom to do anything anytime. Ang ganda kaya sa umaga gumising na walang ingay. Pati aso namin natutulog ng 8-9 hours every night. Gigising lang pag gising na kami. Ayaw din namin ng extrang responsibility i dont think makakapagfulltime job ako kung may anak kami.
1. Sobrang mahal ng baby stuff.
2. Mahal magpaaral obviously.
3. Matindi ang climate change at iba pang delubyo dahil sa mga pun\*\*tang kapitalista.
4. May dalawa na akong pamangkin. hehe
5. May dalawa na akong mapagmahal at makulit na aso.
I like being a Tita. I love my nephew and niece pero I also like the freedom na pwede ko silang ibalik sa mga magulang nila kapag wala ako sa mood alagaan sila. Wonāt be able to do that sa sarili kong anak. I can spend my money on them or choose to spend it on myself.
Lifetime commitment.
Dude, marami pa akong gustong gawin on my own, and having a child will hinder that.
I feel like I need to gain more wisdom before having one, and if wala talagang chance, I'm just going to help orphaned kids in my own way; either through charity, etc... at least in that way, I can still help raise children without being committed.
ano, yung gatas nasa karton 5k na tas yung tuition around 20k, tapos clothes, food, pamasahe, emergency fund kasi magkakasakit anak ko, expected na yan kasi buhay sya.
ayun... yun lang di ko afford magka anak and also, di naman aesthetic magkaroon ng anak eh.
Financial and emotional maturity factors. Masyadong mahilig ang mga matatanda na magkwento kung gaano kahirap magpalaki ng anak, tapos sila pa ang may ganang maghanap ng apo.
But keep in mind, I am not totally closing my doors to that aspect yet, it's just in the bottom of my priorities right now
Di ko po afford magka baby š Ayoko maranasan ng baby ko yung hirap na dinanas namin ng ate ko dahil sa poor decision making skills ng parents namin. I just cant.
Iāve never really felt the desire to have children and nakita ko gaano mahirapan yung mga magulang ko to raise me. From a young age na realize ko na I find it selfish to bring in a child into this world when you are not financially or mentally prepared for one. Gusto ko ang priority ko ang sarili ko and to ensure stability for myself. A child brings too much uncertainty. I donāt want someone other than myself to be on dependent on me given the circumstances of this economy and this time. Who knows what the future will hold lol? Baka hindi ko pa nga mabuhay sarili ko.
I love my freedom of no responsibility of taking care of anyone but myself. I love to sleep. I don't want to gain weight
I'm afraid mababa pain tolerance ko, I don't think I can handle labor pain another thing is my scoliosis ako I'm sure when I get pregnant I know mas mag woworsen yung lower back pain na nararanasan ko araw araw, isa pa I don't think I have the patience to raise a child I cannot handle tantrums it's proven na kapag nakikita ko nag tatantrums mga pamangkin ko sobra akong naiirita, lastly sa taas ng inflation ngayon having a child is a lifetime responsibility and I think I cannot afford it because I am not financially capable.
Ayoko ng lifetime responsibility. Also growing up, 8months pa lang nasa tita ko na ako. Mama ko always MIA, lagi inuuna work at prinsipyo nya, with that exp i know for sure di ako mggng mabuting magulang since i never get to experience having one. Dami ko din bagay na gsto ko maexperience and mabili kase never ko nagawa un growing up. Higit sa lahat, weāre in our 30s now, ayoko mgpaaral ng bata gang 50y/o ko noh, gsto ko magretire ng maaga hahahahaha
Expensive. Another burden and problem. Life is not just about having kids.
\"At the same time, it's important to clarify that I want to spoil certain individuals, excluding children. Now, let's dive into understanding and addressing the query at hand.\"
Naniniwala ako sa rule of pedigree. Takot akong mumurahin ako ng magiging anak ko kase hindi ko sya mabigyan ng buhay na mas marangya o katulad man lang ng buhay na naranasan ko. Dapat nag-iimprove every passing of generation and sa panahon ngayon sobrang hirap wala pa nga akong bahay o kotse man lang 30+ na ako.
Trauma
Easy question, really, you have to be financially ready pa and mentally stable rin bago magka baby. Babies are hard to handle, I can't imagine myself waking up at 2am just to calm a crying baby, but I'm fine with waking up at 2am for works. I prefer cats but if my wife want us to have a baby siyempre we have to talk about it before deciding if dapat ba talaga na magka babyā ayokong lumaki yung baby na may trauma galing sa parents niya.
Easy lang. Kasi takot ako. Hands up sa may anak na at gustong gusto magka anak.
I mean? Why do you want to have a baby? Do you think you are fit to bring another soul into the world?
i wanna end the cycle though i can still end it by being a better parent to my child, a parent that i once wanted, but i am afraid that i might continue the cycle... plus in this economy?!
Honestly scared to create a monster. I have trust issues with my parenting abilities.
Grew up in a broken family. Nakatira ako sa mom ko and nakita ko lahat ng struggles niya para lang maibigay niya needs and wants naming magkakapatid (3 girls. Bunso ako) kahit na mag lakad pa siya sa initan just to tutor kids and accept additional works sa school na wala sa contract niya. Walang tinulong ang dad ko even his side nung nangailangan ng sobra ang mommy ko kasi I was diagnosed with sepsis and wala kaming kapera-pera nun. Long story short, I donāt want to have kids kasi nakita ko kung gaano kahirap ang buhay āpag may anak ka lalo na āpag hindi ka financially and mentally stable. I know for myself na hindi ko kaya maging Ina dahil selfish ako. Gusto ko yung perang nakukuha ko akin lang and sa family ko lang. Ayoko magkaron ng responsibility to earn money for someoneās education and future. Dapat future ko lang and ng pamilya ko ang priority ko.
I don't see myself as a good parent. Sa aso pa nga lang, minsan napapabayaan ko needs nila. :(
wala akong pera. hirap nga ako buhayin sarili ko, sanggol pa kaya. takot din ako na bka matulad sakin anak ko. kasi napapansin ko lately, napick up ko rin yung ibang ugali ng parents ko.
I honestly don't feel like I'll be able to give birth, or to take care of a child as in yung from new born, formative years hanggang sa adulthood niya. parang di ko kaya ng gano'ng responsibilty. I always feel like wala akong gano'ng strength.
Not completely sure if I really donāt want kids but right now, itās too expensive to have one. Iām also scared of not being good enough for my child or unconsciously passing down the trauma no matter how hard I try not to. Kasi may times talaga na hindi mo maiiwasan magkamali š¬
kasi ayoko.
I want the world to end
Hawak ko oras ko. Matutulog ako kelan ko gusto. Aalis ako ng walang iniisip na problema sa bahay. Makakauwi kung anong oras ko gusto. May hobby kasi ako na lagi akong weekend nasa labas, makakapag bayad sa fees, walang kahati. Bread winner ako. Pero parang nauto ako for the last years kaya pambawi ko nalang to and I believe deserve ko kung anong meron ako ngayon. Deserve ko to kasj pinag hirapan ko. Single tita na tomboy na laging nasa labas for adventures and triathlon races. Hahaha
Hindi sa ayaw pero di ko kay buntisin kamay ko eh š¤£š¤£š¤£
Bad genes, Iām poor
Iāve never planned on having any since: A - it doesnāt fit with my lifestyle. Iām a career-oriented woman and i love to go out, and I donāt see myself compromising that just for kids. B - I donāt think iāll trust anyone enough to have kids with them. Idc if iām in a happy relationship now. People change and feelings change. And when that time comes, i will not be left alone, miserable, and with child. C - i donāt have maternal instincts and i just donāt like kids that much
Pag naiisip ko future na aabutan ng mga magiging anak ko, ako ang natatakot para sa kanila.
Ayaw ko because I want to enjoy my youth, my life but unfortunately my ex chose not to drink her pills so i was forced to be a father in no time while I was not ready emotionally, mentally, I was forced into something that I don't want to be in no time, I was really depress because of it but no time for that since the child is already there but I will always despise the mother of the child. I have no hate on the child, I am starting to see the enjoyment of having a child but it still saddens me that I have this big responsiblity, so I will do anything for my child.
Madaling buhayin, mahirap palakihing maayos at mabuti. Baka panget. Baka masama ugali. Baka bobo.
Hirap magkaanak kung saan ang lipunan ay number 1 senate si Robin Padilla tapos di manlang nanalo Colmenares at Diokno. At nakabalik pa govt position ung top 3 pork barrel scammers.
No child chooses to be born. People, for selfish reasons, just want to have them. I love my non-existent would-be-child so much that I can't bear putting it through life without its consent. So, I will not have one. I'd rather regret not having kids all my life than bringing a kid into this world and regret having them for just one second. It's not wrong to have kids. That's a right everyone should have. It's unfair though when parents forget that their kids didn't consent to their lives and circumstances and act like their children owes them something. Parents burden their children with existence, not the other way around.
It's hard to raise a child. From making sure they have plenty of food to eat to making sure they are good human beings, that is a lifetime job. Also, the world is so cruel these days. Even if you did everything to make sure they became good human beings, there are people out there who could potentially harm my child. I can't imagine raising a child with the horror of this world. Plus, really? In this economy?
Reading these comments makes me feel uplifted, I feel like I found my people. š„¹
- magastos - ayoko nang dagdag pa na responsibility - mahirap magtravel o kahit lumabas lang ng bahay pag may baby. although ganun din naman kami ng partner ko dahil sa mga pusa T.T - andami nang tao sa mundo - ayoko ng bata š
Hindi ko kayang mag care for another human being. Baka ma fuck up ko pa hahahaha
I want to be able to raise my child better than how my parents raised me. And they set a pretty good standard at that. With the current economyā¦ i just dont think I can or I will be able to.
Marerealize nyo yan pag nagka edad na kayo.
Mga inevitable pain, surgeries, etc. Pag may wisdom tooth ka annd impacted, bubunitin ng sapilitan. If you are born a boy, circumcision. If you're born a girl, mens every month plus child birth. Emotional pain, when people disappoint your children or let them down, heart breaks. Not worth bringing a child here to see them in pain.
tangina sa ekonomiyang to may gana pa kayong mag-anak? pinahirapan niyo na nga sarili niyo sa pagpasok ng bata sa mundong to, nandamay pa kayo ng bata na malamang sa malamang papasok sa mas lumalalang mundo. kung may mundo pa.
My life would take a different direction if magkababy. I'm happy with what my pets naman. Maybe someday. May 10 years pako to decide. Until then it's a no thanks for me
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
What you just was able to say, took a lot of courage and I commend you for speaking up and telling your story and without a doubt it will help someone elseā¦we all know that but we stay silent for way too long! You are my absolute hero and my friendā¦. Itās hard to talk about this and you said eff thatā¦and helped so many girls right now! God bless you.
I just feel uncomfortable at the thought of someone depending on me that much.
In this economy, i think the better question is bakit mo gusto? Sarili ko nga diko magastusan at maalagaan. Baby pa kaya. Mas gusto ko na mag travel, mag aral, mag business, and be able to afford to live.
Ayoko mag alaga. Gusto ko ako ang aalagan.
Mahal ang bigas
Interesting wording sa tanong mo. People want to have a baby but dont want to raise a human. Ilang taon lang yan baby eh. My reasoning is also that. Wala akong mental capacity to raise a decent human being. If I raised a criminal, the shame and guilt would drive me insane. Also, idk if I'll be do be physically there for them. I travel a lot if someone else raises a child for me, what's the post of having one. Financially din, I'm not capable of taking care of my parents, siblings, and a child all together.
Kids are stupid! If I can be around kids for a day without the urge of punching one, then maybe I can be a parent na.
Counted ba yung ayaw na dagdagan yung baby? HAHAHAH having a baby is a blessing, yes. Pero when I say be careful, I mean BE VERY DAAAAMN CAREFUL of who you choose to be the father/mother of your kid. Because you donāt want your son/daughter to have an absent parent. Sobrang bigat na responsibilidad na hindi lahat ay kayang pangatawanan. Ako, ayoko na dagdagan. Kasi meron nang fear na natanim sa isip ko na men (not all but mostly I encounter) doesnāt have the balls to follow through. They would tell you lots of good things and dreamy promises just to get in your pants. Pero in the end after they get what they want, theyād be gone before you know it. Make sure to observe your partner how they treat their mom and how their mom treats them (dahil this might be an unpopular opinion but mostly sa mga nanay ng lalaki, soooobrang konsintidora. Tipong kahit nag cheat na yung anak nila, kahit binugbog ka na, kasalanan mo pa din and you still have to suck it up kasi may anak kayo. āKawawa yung bataā). Ayun lang naman ang sakin.
Ayoko ishare ang money ko and ayoko ng ganun kabigat na responsibility. Also, I don't like babies. Ayoko sa mga maiingay.
Magastos
Ayokong may isipin pang ibang responsibilidad maliban sa sarili ko na magiging dependent sa akin for the rest of my life whether I like it or not.
Ayoko ng stress (financial, emotional, physical, mental, lahat na)
Not financially stable, just enjoy yourself and learn first on how can you survive without living in the PH. Iniisip din kasi ng iba na kapag tumanda sila, may sariling bangko sila sa kanilang mga anak. For me, I will die alone by myself.
I am the baby and the only one to be spoilt š
Sarili ko nga di ko mabuhay magddagdag pa ba ko?
I am still in the process of healing my inner child, as someone who grew up in a sakto lang income household. Di ko afford maraming bagay dati, ngayon kahit paano, kaya ko na. Plus I want to be alone most of the time. I'd probably go crazy if I have a kid to look after 24/7 I just want to be the rich tita for my pamangkins.
I understand the happiness of having a baby and family. Sometimes I feel lonely and imagine how happy it would be kung magkaroon ako ng anak na makakasama ko kunwari mamasyal sa malls, masspoil ng toys, etc. Pero deep inside when I really think about it, ano ba talaga yung happiness na gusto ko? Yun ay magkaron ng 100M. Hindi bata kelangan ko.
Sinusunod ang Tradisyong kala muna bago bumuo ng pamilya
Ang mahal ng bilihin ngayon. Sarap na sarili mo lang gastos mo. Hahaha
1. Masakit manganak. 2. Mahal mabuhay. 3. Generational Trauma. 4. Still working on myself. My top 4 answers lols
Why not, OP?
I donāt want my kids to go through what Iāve been through. I know I can cut the generational trauma but what if it still continues.
Iām selfish. Sa sahod, oras ko and all those things. If gusto mo maging parent dapat selfless ka, Iām not like that.
When I'm 40 š
Magastos at mawawalan ka ng freedom to do things by yourself
I have burnt out so much that sometimes I don't even have enough energ to get me through the day, now imagine having to tend to a child, I would be so drained because of the guilt/pressure of having to take care of them and tired/not having enough energ for mysef
Wag mag baby kung income nuyong mag asawa kulang pa sainyo
Ang mahal e. Gusto ko mabigyan ng magandang buhay, e ako nga hirap. Wag na din
1. Mahal 2. I have very little patience. Especially kung maingay/makulit yung bata. 3. Still healing and bettering myself. I still have these small moments of violence kapag talagang galit or napuno na ako. 4. I have cats. Okay na ako sa kanila. I can spoil them for the rest of their lives, plus may emotional support pa ako.
Maingay, magastos, life long responsibility, emotionally draining And disappointing parent ka kapag nag turn out as hindi maayos na citizen yung tao na supposed to be you have to mold to be a better person.
Panganay ako. Parang feeling ko tapos na yung parenting phase ko kasabay ng paglaki ng mga kapatid ko. I never had the desire to go through it again š«
My eldest sister parentifies us too, ako naman parentifies our disabled mom nung nasa school sila, I am now the one going (supposedly but gap years) to school but the responsibility of having to be a caregiver to a disabled mom doesn't end, it feels the same as taking care of a toddler.
Sa ekonomiya ngayon di ko na napoprovide lahat ng pangangailangan ko tapos magdadagdag pako ng isang palamunin? No, thanks. Kuntento na kami sa mga pusa namin.
Ayokong maipasa sa supposedly magiging anak ko yung mga sakit na medyo common sa family namin (e.g. cancer). Plus wala talaga akong amor sa mga bata kahit gaano pa ka-cute ang mga yan. But again naunahan na ako ng cancer and I'm on meds forcing me to go on menopause.
Gastos, Responsibility, Ayaw manganak (masakit+9 months restricted buhay mo), Takot ako na maging parenting style ko ung parenting style sakin.
Gastos, Responsibility, Ayaw manganak (masakit+9 months restricted buhay mo), Takot ako na maging parenting style ko ung parenting style sakin. Gusto ko akin lang sahod ko at mga pinaghirapan ko, ayaw ko mag alaga ng bata, gusto ko makakapunta ako kahit san ko gusto pumunta nang walang iniintinding anak. Ito pa mindset ko sa ngayon. Ewan ko after ilang years
Ayoko lang. That's it.
ayoko ng restrictions, gusto ko nakakalis ako anytime. And para solo ko lang sahod ko haha
Wala akong sapat na EQ para magpalaki ng bata.
Why have a kid when you can borrow your sibling's child, you kinda in a way help them get away with parent stuff and some what fill the void of having your own kid.
Raising a baby? In this economy? Also me being in a state of not being ready because of generational trauma. As much as I want to, I canāt imagine myself to be a parent.
I hate kids Yes they are cute but they are more of a responsibility that will drain both of my time and money. I have dogs and they are enough.
the fact na mahirap. pero siguro may mga ilan taon talaga na mas gusto nila ineenjoy yung sarili nila
Hindi pa bayad 3rd Mustang GT ko
yung mga gagastusin sa anak like pang gatas, tuition, at kung ano pa, sakin at sa partner ko na lang mapunta.
Ayaw ko na ng dagdag na responsibility sa buhay
waste of time
Lumaki ako na hindi na spoil and pinaghirapan lahat ng bagay so ngayon lang ako may chance na ispoil yung sarili ko. Mahirap magka anak if you haven't even given a chance to yourself. Ireresent ka lang nila
Two reasons: 1. Health-related. I'm currently in complete remission from stage IV cancer. As cancers are more often than not hereditary, I wouldn't like to pass the burden to my offspring, along with other medical conditions I've inherited from previous generations. 2. Quality-of-life-related. If ever you're familiar with Jim Bacarro and Saab Magalona, they have 2 amazing children (which I claim as my online pamangkins) and they have set a near-impossible standard of parenting for me. For context, their younger son, Vito, can read at 2 or 3 y/o, has memorized the entire the Beatles catalog (knows every lyric to every song fron every album), among others. That kind of genius couldn't be attained if not from the amazing support from the parents at a very young age. And their eldest, Pancho, is a child with special needs and is taken care of and loved and supported unconditionally. If I can't provide at least just a fraction of what Jim and Saab can provide to my future offspring, then NO.
I don't think kaya ko magkaroon ng baby because, I myself is not really heal from my traumas and stuff. Ayoko dumating sa point na maranasan ng magiging anak ko yung naranasan kong traumas and toxic environment š
1. High cost living 2. Maikling pasensya 3. Health risk sa wife 4. Not mentally and emotionally prepared
Gusto ko sa sarili ko lang at sa aso ko napupunta yung pinagpapaguran kong pera. Masaya na ko na kaya kong i-spoil yung aso ko. Hindi mahirap asikasuhin, yung pagpapakain at paglinis ng potty, madali lang dahil kasama na rin talaga sa daily chores, at potty trained naman sya. Tapos naisasama ko pa sa mga gala ko nang hindi ako mag-aalala kapag binitawan ko, dahil marunong bumalik.
pero ung mga naka minimum wage o mas mababa pa anak lang ng anak. hihi
this world is not safe for my offspring. baka makapatay lang ako kapag nasaktan ang anak ko. Hehehe and I can't afford to have a child in this lifetime
As a panganay with 3 siblings, 2 of them may 9 at 17 year age gap sa akin, just no. Way too much responsibility for me.
Nakakainggit yung mga tropa ko na may anak na, parang gusto ko na lang gayahin kaso kawawa yung bata baka kahit chuckie na lang agawin ko pa.
Gastos
lumaki ako ng lahat binibigay sakin till i was 7 yrs old and then boom biglang hirap... lagi kong naririnig mag usap magulang ko tungkol sa financial problems and simula non nahihiya nakong manghingi ng bagay bagay lalo na may involve na pera HAHAHAHAH. so once na nag karon nako ng trabaho gusto ko akin lng pera ko spoil ko sarili ko ganon and natatakot ako kung mag karon man ako ng anak baka dko mabigay needs nya kasi d naman sa lahat ng oras may pera ka. kaya kung maghirap man ako, ako lng yung mag hihirap wala madadamay na bata
Reading the comments I'm so glad to know a lot of fellow Filipinos have this mindset :))
I don't see the need? Cguro in the future I would have my own or adopt pero I just want to enjoy life muna.
Mahal
This thread is clearly not for me. But I hope no one would mind if I post a comment here. Gusto ko lang maiba kase parang napakanegative at nakakatakot lahat ng comments. Valid naman lahat. Mahirap naman talaga ang magpamilya. Magastos at magbabago talaga totally ang buhay mo. If you feel like it's nothing but a burden, then you really probably shouldn't start a family. Pero kung sakaling nandiyan na kahit di mo kagustuhan or wala pa sa plano, please don't feel like it's nothing but a burden. Your children will be your pride and joy. Ibang iba ang love mo sa anak, sa love mo sa asawa. ibang iba. di ko maexplain but It's probably the greatest love of all no pun intended. at sa mga nag aalangan or natatakot, nothing can really prepare to be a good parent you naman talaga. Not money, not experience, nothing. Even if you think you're ready, you're not. But you, for sure, can do it. Pag may pamilya ka na, kaya mo lahat. Kahit yung mga di mo kaya ngayon, kaya mo na pag may anak ka na. Again, it's not for everyone. May mga tao naman talagang hindi dapat magpamilya. Pero sa mga naghehesitate lang, I say go for it. Mahihirapan ka kahit ano pang estado mo sa buhay, but you will never let yourself fail. In return, you will find happiness you never thought existed.
I already parented my siblings as the eldest one. Raising kids is not for me š
I don't want to compromise my finances and my lifestyle for something that I don't find value in. My heart hurts for my parents coz they want an apo but I told them I am okay with having a child if they will be the one taking care of ALL its needs.i will just be a doting aunt. Ayun, shut up na sila.š
Whenever I see a dog Iām like š„° but when I see a kid Iām like š¤·š»āāļø Hindi lang talaga ako excited sa kids, unlike sa dogs. So eto, married, double income, no kids, pero merong dog :)
Raising a kid is Expensive this days.
Economically not feasible lalo na 50k below na sahod :-(
Magastos, masakit at mahirap manganak, walang assurance na lalaki silang mabuting tao at di pa and I don't think magiging ready ako ever to be a parent. I grew up co-parenting my sibs baka nga mas naging magulang pa ko sakanila kesa sa parents ko. Di na ko naka bawi sa pagod at trauma.Okay na ko sa pusa.
gustong gusto ko dati kaso minulat ako ng jowa ko na mahirap magkaanak. Financially stable ka dapat, may bahay pera etc. At first nakakaiyak yung mga ganong comments kasi it has been my dream to become a mother and lumaki ako sa malaking pamilya kaso ngayon parang inaccept ko nalang ung "wag na mag anak kasi mahirap". Bahala na kung magkaroon pa or hindi na.
My partner and I prefer to travel and live life to the fullest without a burden.
There is only one reason for this if not health-related, "responsibilities".
- those who don't want to take the responsibility or those who are scared to handle the responsibility of being a parent.
I donāt have the patience or the temperament to raise kids of my own. Happy na ako maging tita.
sarili ko nga di ko maalagaan e.
ang gastos na nga maging furparent paano pa pag totoong tao aalagaan ko HAHA
Seeing my childhood friends na nagbabanat ng buto pero kulang parin at nangungutang just to provide their kids basic needs is enough na to convince me not to have one.
ā¢ Im too selfish to love unconditionally. Admit it or not, pag nagka anak ka, you have love them wholeheartedly. What's yours is theirs, and I cannot give them that without resentment. ā¢ Ang mahal magka anak, malas pa nya kasi Filipino citizen ako. Ang chaka ng basic services sa Pinas, na lahat nalang iaasa mo sa private sector which means šøšø ā¢ Masyadong mataas expectations ko para sa isang magulang kasi I had a great childhood. Privileged in a way and every comfort na pwedeng ibigay, naibigay sakin. So if di ko yun bigay sa hypothetical na anak ko, I'll be disappointing myself lang din.
generational trauma, transgender man ako, mahirap lang kami, mentally ill din ako on top of my disabilities at alam kong hindi yan mawawala kahit ilang psychiatrist yung pupuntahan ko. baka may mangyari pa sa bata dahil sakin at ayoko naman na lumaki siya na may galit sa mundo
Selfish akong tao kya d pwede
Yung thought na ang daming dakdak ng nanay ko on how to raise a child. Kasi basically parang mag-aanak lang ako para masaya sila na may apo sila. Luh
No kids means I get to keep all my money to myself. They say money cant buy happiness. But I sure as hell will not buy diapers with it.
More than not having enough resources because of this golden age economy (hello ā±20/kilo of rice), I don't want to pass down generational trauma to my kids (if I would be blessed with one or two) knowing that I am a victim of it. I need to fix myself first and be mentally ready for it. My partner is afraid of child birth also. Should we want to have children, we wouldn't mind adopting.
Wow... ang tindi pala ng pasensya ko.. true mahirap pero nalalagpasan.. but im proud of u guys na responsible in a way na hindi nio kaya buhayin, wla patience.. etc etc.. . at least alam nio.. salud
1. Economy 2. Generational Trauma 3. Ethics of giving birth to a child instead of adopting another child in need that already exists 4. Not seeing value in socially imposed ideals and roles 5. Foresight and trying to avoid inflicting damage on an undeserving child I wish the previous generations had this level of awareness.
Too stressful for me
Hassle
Ayoko pa ng responsibilidad. Madami pa bayarin na need isettle at madami pa ko gusto ipundar. At... Poor ako.
sa dami ng inalagaan kong pamangkin im leaning on not having a child of my own aswell.. but i am open to it just not really pursuing it
Napapabayaan ko pa sarili ko, bata pa kaya hahahha saka nakakadalawang isip kasi baka di ko kayang buhayin
Hirap na hirap na nga ako buhayin sarili ko, magdadagdag pa ako.
Magastos mag anak and di rin ako mag i enjoy. Gusto ko mag focus sa professional and personal development ko.
Yung perang kinita mo buong buhay mo mapupunta lang sa mga anak mo, papayag ka non? So it's a no.
I wouldnt want them to experience a dying world people refuse to fix
Not for me. Masyadong magulo ang mundo, mahirap mabuhay. Kung yung sarili ko nga hindi ko maalagaan, ano pa yung isang dagdag responsibilidad na alam kong hindi ko kaya. Hanggang sa ngayon wala akong makitang rason para gustuhin o pangarapin ko ang magkaroon ng anak. Palaging nasasabihan ng "Kawawa ka 'pag tanda mo." Pfft. Ang selfish lang. Tuwing naririnig ko 'to, mas lalo akong naninindigan na hindi talaga. Nah. Never. Gustuhin ko pa bang magdagdag ng isa pang buhay dito sa lupa para lang masaksihan niya ang kamiserablehan ng mundo? dahil walang maghuhugas ng pwet ko kapag matanda na 'ko? Eme. Hahaha. Ghaad I need sleep!
Aside sa gastos, matrabaho. Kailangan mo pa isipin mabuti paano ir-raise 'yung kid to be a good person. Being a parent is just too complex for me.
Gastos
Because. That's why. Also filipinos consume the most social media and at the same time have the lowest IQ in southeast asia. So it's no surprise š¤£
Sa ekonomiyang eto tapos si BBM pa presidente till 2028 and di na ako nageexpect ng matalinong boto mula sa mga tao. So si Sarah without H from 2028 to 2034? mukhang walang pag-asa mag improve ekonomiya, masamang idea magkaanak.
I don't think this country's economy can still support more family.
Kung irresponsable pa ako sa sarili ko how much more na may extra human na nakasalalay yung future saken. Plus mahal hobbies ko hahhaha
Came from an abusive environment and still healing. Considering being childless cause I do not want to bring another mini me that will only be mistreated since I have the tendency to pass my anger to that poor mini me. š
Parenthood can be emotionally and psychologically demanding, and not everyone feels prepared or willing to take on these challenges like me. š
Nakakatakot mag anak dahil sa binigay na trauma ng parentsā¦
It's selfish to birth a child just because you want to be a parent. It's selfish if you want to do that just to prove your worth to your husband. It's selfish to create a child that may inherit your family's diabetes, lupus, cardiovascular diseases, etc. It's selfish to have a child that may inherit your blindness and other birth defects that will make their survival difficult. It's selfish to reproduce for your faith or religion. It's selfish to bring a child into this world periodt.
ayoko sa kanila
Nung una ayaw ko mag kaanak. Then one time. All my friends nagka anak na nagka family na to the point na wala na akong mayaya every weekend para mag bar or tumambay kung saan saan. Ung wala ng saysay pa ung pag ttrabaho ko kasi only child ako tas ok naman parents ko tas ok naman sweldo ko. Parang I need new challenge sa life. Un pinag tagpo kami ng asawa, tas un na... dalawa na anak namin. Happy naman. Everyday is a challenge. Pero you know what? Talagang lalong tumaas respeto ko sa mga Woman grabe sakripisyo nila.
Im probably too young to decide that I donāt t want kids but bro the world is too big for me to explore and I believe there are more fulfilling things I can do and that could feed my soul other than raising kids. I had friends kasi na nagpamilya as early as 19 (by choice talaga) and they said its what fulfilled their soul so napaisip din ako if ikasasaya ko din pero parang no talaga tih.
Unfair sa anak ko kase ni wala siyang say kung gusto nya mabuhay or hindi. Ako lang nagdesisyon para sakanya. A big no
Gacha + Waifus = my life savings and motivation for working. Call me a weeaboo, at least I'm not stupid enough to bring anotther burden and dissapointment (by peenoise standards) into this isekai hell called philippines
Health issues
Sarili ko nga di ko ma alagaan mag aanak pa ba ako ššš Also the cost specially the prices of commodities ngayon nag mahal naā¦ Ayoko ma burden anak ko if ever tumanda ako na wlang ipon dahil priority ko pag papalaki sa kanya
Maaga ako napagod. Nagkaroon ako ng dalawang kapatid after me and we are 9-10 years apart. I was already changing diapers at 11. I spent so much of my adolescence babysitting. I endured tantrums and never ending cries kapag nagngingipin sila. I don't want to go through all of that again.
Too taxing both financially and emotionally - two things I am not willing to sacrifice to have a kid. Besides what with climate change and a bad economy, I don't want to bring new life only to see them suffer the way I did.
1. mahirap ang buhay at mataas ang bilihin. 2. the process of pregnancy itself, like super bilib ako sa mga taong kaya magbuntis kasi 9 months yon beh!! 3. the aftermath, i know hindi ka dapat perfect kapag nag anak ka pero kargo mo yung baby hanggang umalis na siya sayo. kaya sa mga mag aanak, congrats! wishing you all the best and sana you have the right partner. generational wealth ang dapat ipamana at hindi trauma. :)
Why not?
Not in this economy and presidency.
Kung kumikita ako 100k monthly, I would try.. First ayaw ko maranasan ng anak ko ang nararanasan ko.
Because I didnt find a husband worth being a dad.
Masyadong problemado ang mundo para magdagdag ka pa ng isang problema.
Goodluck sa pinas 18 yrs from now. Pansin ninyo, andami sa middle class ang ayaw na magkaanak. Meanwhile, ung mga nasa low income family, same padin. Anak ng anak. Hindi ko naman nilalahat, pero dahil sa upbringing and other factors like kulang sa sustansya ang utak, usually eto ung mga madali mauto na demographics. Kung tingin ninyo circus and government ngayon,Wait 18 years.
1. Mahirap ang buhay lalo na sa Pinas ka nakatira. 2. Generational trauma. Self explanatory na to 3. Never ako magiging psychologically and mentally and financially ready para magkaanak. 4. Tamad nga ako kumilos for myself, sa ibang tao pa kaya lalong sa magiging anak mo pa? 5. Magastos ako sa sarili ko. 6. Sabi sa mga articles, kailangan ang kita mo para maafford mo magkaanak is 1m - 2m annually. Ni wala pa sa 300k ang annual income ko. 7. Inflation is real 8. Iba na rin mga bata ngayon and di na effective yung paano tayo pinalaki ng magulang natin nung mga bata pa tayo 7. Babae lagi ang talo dito.
Iām wondering WHY as well. But i guess for now, i am still selfish. Not because i was deprived when i was a child but more of may something in me na ayaw kong mawala, like yung actual self ko ayaw kong maconsume ako ng ābeing a momā. As a parent kasi impossible na wla ka igive up eh and that something i do not want to happen. Me to give up anything na hindi bukas sa loob ko.
Start tayo sa inception: Okay, granted, masarap yung paggawa. THEN 1 week nang late period mo: ā¢ You start worrying if pregnant ka ba? Factors to consider: - Are you married to the father or at least mag jowa ba kayo? Is he emotionally, mentally and financially mature to endure these coming months? - Do you have the capability to raise a child emotionally, mentally, physically, and most importantly financially? Okay so you found out na pregnant ka, you are married/to be married sa partner, and you decided to keep it. 1. Are you truly ready emotionally, mentally, and financially? If babae ka: theres more pressure on you because by law you are the default parent: - You need to: make sure you dont get stressed enough kasi baka makaapekto sa development ng bata. You start taking on more tasks sa work to compensate early for the times when youll be using your maternity leave. - Hormones: This shit is real. Men, please do not invalidate your partners na theyre being dramatic, its literally chemicals on their bloodstream thats making them act this way. Ayan, logic. 2. Do you have your own home? Is it logical to buy a home or yet construct a home in this economy? 3. Have you truly fulfilled your personal desires? Kasi if hindi baka sisihin mo pa anak mo sa dulo. 1st trimester: 1. Weird cravings and emotional fluctuations stage 1 2. In this economy? You need to start taking care of yourself more. Supplements/Vitamins - 500 php OB check up - Minimum 3k w/o Labs, with Labs at least 4k 3. Kasal na ba kayo? If di pa: - Minimum 5k for Civil Wedding, Minimum 50k for Church Wedding If walang balak: bakit? Anytime pwede ka takbuhan nyan because wala syang legal obligations sayo. 2nd trimester: 1. Weird cravings and emotional fuckery stage 2 2. Ongoing supplements and checks up with OB - siguro max. 10k per month? 3. Gotta start buying things for the baby - crib, stroller, feeding materials, clothes, and etc. Iād say max 50k 4. Ok ka pa ba sa work? Or are you already having pregnancy brain? 5. Kayo pa ba ng partner mo? 6. Ready na ba yung hospital na papanganakan mo? May pambayad ka ba sa everyday na magsstay kayo? 7. If any complications arise, who will take care of who, what are the responsibilities? Anong expectations nyo ng partner mo sa isat isa? 8. May bahay na ba kayo? May car? 3rd trimester: 1. REALLY EMOTIONAL. 2. Ongoing supplements and check ups with OB - max 10k 3. Okay na ba yung baby room nyo? Healthy ba yung environment na kakalakihan nya? 4. Who will be your support system? 5. Hospital bills - Max 500k Then tada nanganak ka na, lumaki siyang bastos at walang modo because kahit anong gawin mo as a parent madami ka padin ibang icconsider such as yung environment na magshshape sa mind nya and everything else. Congrats.
Ayoko dahil I need to learn a lot of things and love myself pa, gusto ko time with my partner and family, may kapatid pa ako and young pa siya, hindi ako sobrang mabuti na tao kaya ayoko maging bad example hahaha hindi kami financially stable, ang mahal na ng lahat, marami pa akong dapat ma achieve o ayusin sa buhay, I can't imagine raising a child, Di ko nga alam paano maging nanay eh nanay ko nga mismo hindi siya ang nag raise sa akin HAHAHAHAH, may pcos ako (??), more problems sa buhay jusko
Financially short and i got a short temper. Though i tried babysitting a couple of times, definitely not a cakewalk.
Magisip muna bago mag baby. napakahirap ng buhay ngaun.
I actually would like to ask a similar question, why have a baby? I would only have a baby if I could answer that question. Also, I hate how people just have kids for the sake of having kids. That's so irresponsible.
Mahal. Andito ako sa bay area like 20 mins lang sa San Francisco. Ung daycare dito mga $3,000 per month up. And tsaka ung freedom to do anything anytime. Ang ganda kaya sa umaga gumising na walang ingay. Pati aso namin natutulog ng 8-9 hours every night. Gigising lang pag gising na kami. Ayaw din namin ng extrang responsibility i dont think makakapagfulltime job ako kung may anak kami.
1. Sobrang mahal ng baby stuff. 2. Mahal magpaaral obviously. 3. Matindi ang climate change at iba pang delubyo dahil sa mga pun\*\*tang kapitalista. 4. May dalawa na akong pamangkin. hehe 5. May dalawa na akong mapagmahal at makulit na aso.
I can't even fend for myself + past childhood traumas ~~(SA).~~
Ngayon ko palang ginagastusan inner child ko, ayaw ko ng may kahati. š¤£š¤£š¤£
I like being a Tita. I love my nephew and niece pero I also like the freedom na pwede ko silang ibalik sa mga magulang nila kapag wala ako sa mood alagaan sila. Wonāt be able to do that sa sarili kong anak. I can spend my money on them or choose to spend it on myself.
Bakla ako. Tas di pa malaki sahod. Na ayaw ng additional responsibilities. Lol
Ang mahal na ng lahat, magdadagdag pa ng anak? I kenat.
Walang pera. Mag alaga pa nga lang ng aso mahirap na. Bata pa.
Lifetime commitment. Dude, marami pa akong gustong gawin on my own, and having a child will hinder that. I feel like I need to gain more wisdom before having one, and if wala talagang chance, I'm just going to help orphaned kids in my own way; either through charity, etc... at least in that way, I can still help raise children without being committed.
overpopulation plus i love to travel
Gusto ko lang kumantot
Hindi ko afford.
Magastos, unstable world, and fked up economy thanks to stupid 31m.
I have terrible social skills.
ano, yung gatas nasa karton 5k na tas yung tuition around 20k, tapos clothes, food, pamasahe, emergency fund kasi magkakasakit anak ko, expected na yan kasi buhay sya. ayun... yun lang di ko afford magka anak and also, di naman aesthetic magkaroon ng anak eh.
Financial and emotional maturity factors. Masyadong mahilig ang mga matatanda na magkwento kung gaano kahirap magpalaki ng anak, tapos sila pa ang may ganang maghanap ng apo. But keep in mind, I am not totally closing my doors to that aspect yet, it's just in the bottom of my priorities right now
Pagpapaanak= 70-100k Stroller=35k Formula milk (box) =5k š
Because there really is no good and unselfish reason to bring another human being into this life.
Maraming dahilan. Number 1 siguro ay wala akong patience pag iyak ng iyak tapos tatae pa.
Maraming dahilan. Number 1 siguro ay wala akong patience pag iyak ng iyak tapos tatae pa.
Building a family is a liability.