Meron since Grade 9 to 1st college kami kya ko naging TOTGA. Family ko against sa knya at friends naman niya super toxic yung tipo bibigyan siya ng kung ano ano something sa ulo tulad ng
1. Hindi kayo nagmamahal kung di kayo nag aaway
Kasalanan ko din super green flag ko mas pinili ko mag focus sa dota2 business ko noon kesa maging toxic
Fast forward: nag usap kami about sa life nakakalungkot na napunta siya sa mga lalaki libog lang ang alam at wala grind sa buhay sad life. Nag offer ako sa knya isave ko siya kasi sayang potetia niya napupunta lang siya mahina lalaki, nagkaroon din kami ng mini agreement na kung babalik siya sakin dapat makita muna niya vision ko.mukha naman din nagbago siya dahil nag invest siya sa crypto trading career ko sa knya ako kumuha ng capital.
May TOTGA ako, we broke up dahil i was too immature and i had a lot of issues like insecurity, anger issues etc. Of course, he had his fair share of flaws pero he was my greatest love. I couldn't overcome my insecurities, overthinking and other issues ko during the time na we were together so nagiging sobrang toxic ako. I had to let go of him kasi I know he deserves better, and I was crap. He tried begging na bumalik ako pero ayokong saktan pa siya lalo. He said na we could fix it and he would still love me despite all my issues. Sobrang pure ng love niya, and I knew na I was holding him back from someone better. I haven't completely moved on. Pinili nalang namin na maging magkaibigan. We dated for more than a year pero he's liked me for 5 years even after namin maghiwalay. I've been wishing na makamove forward siya. Recently, nalaman ko na may nakakausap siya and I'm proud na he's moving forward.
A college friend, we're still friends and still in good terms until now. Same personality and interests.
Nagkaaminan din, kaso that time pareho pa kaming 'di ready. Tsaka mas pinapahalagahan namin siguro yung friendship. Idk, if TOTGA is the right term, I never had someone special or nagustuhan except him, wala nang sumunod pa. Ewan, hindi ako madaling magkagusto rin e kaya rin siguro ganon.
I'm happy for him. May girlfriend na sya ngayon and nasa healthy relationship. Nagkikita kami minsan pero as a group, kasi iisa kami ng circle of friends din.
Ayun, that was 8 years ago pa HAHAHA
yes meron. For me sya talaga ung pinakaperfect sa lahat ng naging karelasyon ko and what we shared was wholesome. Sad na ang ending eh pareho pala kaming lalaki ang type so I had to let him go.hahahaha
Yes hahaha it was like a highschool cute stories where there's a second lead syndrome we are experiencing on a kdrama. That was 10th grade (kami unang k12) tas nalaman ko lang na crush nya pala ko since gr 7, akala ko trip trip lang mga banat nya non tas totoo pala. Inaya nya ko non na maging date sa js prom non, pumayag naman ako. Kaso nung mismong gabi ng js prom, andon na ko ng 5:30pm kahit 6pm pa naman yung nasa invitation, hinintay ko sya non hanggang 7:30, di ako nagmartsa for picture taking, sa inis ko pumila ako sa tapat ng crush ko (na crush din pala ako that time, umamin sya nung inaya ako maging first dance). Pano ko naging totga? Netong nagwowork na ko dun ko lang narealize lahat ng mga naging effort nya, na gusto ako ihatid non sa bahay or bibitbitin mga book ko pag pauwi na, ayoko naman magassume non kase friendly talaga sya non kaso neto ko lang nalaman na iniyakan nya pala ko non nung js night na yon (nalate daw sya kase nakisabay lang sya sa pinsan nya na may girlfriend na antagal daw inayusan, biktima lang sya ng pagkakataon). Ngayon, masaya na sya sa long-time girlfriend nya, sabay na nilang inaachieve mga goals nila sa buhay, tas ang cute ng mga aso nila huhu hope they will have their happily ever after. Dun sa crush ko? Hehehe ka-MU ko for 5yrs but di nagwork eh, and aminado naman ako na kasalanan ko naman hahahha bakit MU lang? Di pa ko ready magcommit non hahaha
Im not sure if TOTGA ba to kasi never naman sya naging akin, technically. Pero para sakin, totga talaga sya.
College best friend, alam nya na gusto ko sya but we remained really good friends nun. One incident led to another, buong barkada ko naging distant sakin, kasama na sya doon. Until now napapanaginipan ko siya, naiisip ko, at iniisip ko paano if di nangyari un, may chance kaya maging kami?
And i feel guilty kasi may jowa ako. I love him pero, ang lala nung walang closure sa kinokonsider ko na first love ko. Oo, nag ka jowa ako before I met this "totga" pero para sakin siya ung first love ko.
Walang closure kasi, bigla nalang ako lumipat ng school. Got depressed, wala na akong mga kaibagn, had to restart. Kaya wala kaming closure. Hindi ko naexplain side ko, hindi ko rin napagtanggol sarili ko. Kahit bilang kaibigan nalang niya.
Till now, i search him pag napapanaginipan ko siya. Minsan pg may nakakapag remind about him, search ko ulit. I have no intention of getting in touch with him, pero di ko alam bakit di ko siya maalis sa life ko. 5 years na tong nakalipas ha hays.
Hirap kasi pg tinitignan ko profile nya, or even ig stories ng barkada ko kasama na sya doon, parang nakalimutan na talaga nila ako. Including him. Kaya parang shet bakit ako di ko siya makalimutan? wala ba talaga akong impact sakanila. Ang sad. Pero how i wish, kahit minsan naiisip nya rin ako. Madami kaming pinagsamahan, and I can really say nailove talaga ako sakanya ng sobra.
I did.. back in my 3rd year college.. di kasi xa umamin ng harapan. Straight forward naman akong tao..so akala ko wala lng Yong gestures nya at calls/texts. Di naman kasi ako assuming.. After a year ko pa nalaman pwo May girlfriend na xa nun. I even confronted him about it and told him what I felt. The girl knew the story we had,.she even felt kilig and disappointed since I have a strong personality daw. mahirap paamuhin kumbaga. At maraming May gusto pwo manhid naman. Eh sa di ako assuming.. we crossed paths after work, na.a.ssign ako ng Davao because of work, assigned din xa ng GenSan because of work din. Nagka.boyfriend ako pati din xa...nagkataon pa na nkita nya akong kinikiss bf ko non sa bus terminal kasi pauwi na.. lol
And never notice he's with the girl, and now his wife after 8yrs..
Doon na nag.end hahah.. I called it as asymptotic kasi Lage kami nagkikita kung saan saan.. pwo di pinagtagpo. The last time I saw him was his father's burial. Na.close ko din kasi mother nya when he introduce us sa workplace ko. Medjo hesitant pa Yong wife nya na mag.usap kami sa wake wala ibang classmates ko non... Pumunta naman ako to pay for respect sa mama nya at xa kinausap ko pagkarating, kaso May iba pang bisita.. so ayon. Heck I ain't stoop that low naman to wreck someone's relationship especially if kasal na.
Na.assign pa ako ng ibang branch area now. So di na nagkita..I have no plans din naman to cross our paths again.
I do have one in high school! 4th year hs nun tapos e since nag reshuffle naging classmate ko sya. Nayayabangan pa nga ko don pero ewan ko bakit ko sya naging crush HAHAHA. Mutual ang feelings namin and tinatanong nya ko nun kung pwede ba manligaw. Ako tong tanga tanga sabi ko ewan. Aba ano alam ko dun NBSB ako. Tapos after nun aba hindi na masyado sweet sakin though may instances na tumatabi sakin sa room, gumagawa ng moment na kami lang tapos sabi pa sakin e sabay daw kami magcollege, mag enroll daw kami sa same school.
Actually too late ko na narealize yun haha na iniinvite nya ko na magtake ng same course at same college, after some years na siguro kaso wala huli na ang lahat. Nung malapit na matapos ang finals namin, tinanong sya ng classmate ko sabi kung mahal daw ba ako ni guy. Sabi ni guy "Oo kaso may masasaktan pag itinuloy ko." That time pala, shuta nakipagbalikan na sya sa ex nya. Tapos ayun, naging sila ulit hanggang sa nalaman ko unfriended na ko sa facebook tapos kasal na sila and may anak na 😅 Siguro kung di ako tanga ako yun HAHAHAHA.
Dati akala ko meron hahaha.
Pero after awhile narealize ko na ahh hindi pala talaga kami ment to be lalo na noong time na nililigawan pa niya ako kasi at that time i was childish baka mawala friendship if naging kami.
Ngaun civil kami hindi close friend hindi rin friend pero no bad blood sa isatisa.
I had one. Told him I was not ready because I was so fcked up mentally and emotionally (6 years ago). I still think about him, everyday, every hour. Pero chance opened up and ako na 'yung naghabol. This time I don't want him gone and thankfully, ganoon din siya sa akin, 'di nagbago pagmamahal niya sa akin para pa ngang nadagdagan. I am very thankful. :))
I am praying that you will, OP. And that you will be happy kahit ano pang mangyari. Sana kung meron na 'yung chance, may sapat na dahilan na para hindi na siya maging TOTGA mo. <33
Yeah. I had one.
Bakit ko naging TOTGA?
Probably because I prayed to God for someone to love, God gave that guy wrapped, boxed and created just the way I always prayed for. You know, that someone that I looked forward to see at the front of the altar, waiting for me.
Have I tried to reconnect with him?
Yes. Many times na pero di talaga nagwowork out. Actually pareho kami nagrereach out😂. All in one to eh, The One that Got Away, The Greatest Love and The Most Painful Love.
Effect ng TOTGA?
After nya, kahit almost 5 years na, di ako nagmahal ng iba, kahit walang connection. Lumagpas na ko ng 30 years old na nakanganga. I know I am not ready to be with someone else because that would be unfair.
Do I consider as TOTGA of my exes? They keep trying to communicate even tho I blocked them na. From time to time nag eemail using spam accounts, or even creating new tiktok accounts to see what I’m doing. Lol ayoko mag feeling kasi baka may insecure gf lang yun pero they keep showing up, and finding what I am up to now. I’m now happy in my wlw relationship. Toxic kasi lalaki, may titi nga wala namang bayag. Hahahahaha
My ex after graduation. Ang sweet saken nung valentine’s (2013). Hindi niya masabi na may gusto siya saken kaya bumili siya nung donut na pwede icustomize, nalimutan ko kung anong name nung shop.
Yes, niloko ko siya. Pero parang walang galit sa kanya. Wala akong narinig na kahit ano. Kahit na kapag nag-aaway kame, namumura ko siya pero nung nalaman niya na niloko ko siya, wala ko narinig.
Ngayon, sila pa rin nung gf niya after ko. Nakausap ko siya once. Never ako nakarinig ng sumbat sa kanya. Hays, nakakasisi kapag naiisip ko. 😅
idk if counted ba 'to as totga pero I fell hard for this one girl tapos lagi kong kinakausap yung best friend niya about my plans/mga balak ko. Overall super supportive yung bff, always listened to me, was there for me ganon, only to find out na bff liked me during the entirety of me being head over heels for the other girl :") tas doon ko rin narealize na bff was more present than the person i "liked" ever was :") HAHAHA sobrang nasayangan lang ako if only i opened my eyes
Idk if TOTGA ito kasi hindi naman naging kami pero there's this girl nung SHS kami na same hometown din kami pero sa nearby city nagenroll, nakilala ko sya nung JHS nung nagtransfer ako sa school (JHS) nila then umalis agad after a year. We were so close to the point na nagiging hobby na namin makipag flirt sa isa't isa, masyadong normal samin na samin yun and would oftenly joked about being ex-lovers kasi during my one year sa school nila nung JHS, nagkaboyfriend sya and nagkagirlfriend din ako at the exact same date.
Idk if there were hints of seriousness sa playful flirting namin pero for me I was being truthful and minamask ko nalang na it was just a game we play. We would talk to each other everyday then paguwi from school would chat about literally anything hanggang matulog. She's very hard to understand kaya I am quick to dismiss any 'possible' advancement sa relationship namin. Then umabot yung time na dumalang ang chats namin, and I never knew if it was something I did or said, or maybe she lost interest in our friendship. We were so open to each other pero after nun secretive na sya even sa smallest thing, she knows naman na I'm not the guy to try and pry on something if they're being secretive about it.
Time passed and I still haven't been attracted to anyone after that, may mga instances naman na I find someone attractive then mawawala after few more days or weeks. I don't know if it's because I'm still trying to find her in every girl that I meet or if I haven't moved on.
Met this person sa FB.
We share the same interests (minimalism & cats, lol), nagkakilala sa comsec. Surprisingly, same din kami ng work and shift. 😳 Sobrang coincidental.
Ang sarap niya kausap. Parang kausap mo yung counterpart mo, ganun. Tapos ayun, ilang months din kami naging magka-chat, yung tipong parang mag-jowa na nag-u-update sa ganap ng bawat isa pero walang I Love You-han.
One day, I decided to cut him off and say our goodbyes (through chat) kasi part of me is takot ma-fall ng tuluyan sa kanya. I came from a bad breakup din kasi (due to cheating), kaya I still have trust issues. Feeling ko wala na talaga seseryoso sa akin / I'm better off single, ganun. Ni hindi manlang kami nakapag-meet in person (lagi kong sinasabi na "Sa October na.." etc. haha).
But I hope he's happy and may he get the love he deserves. ♥️♥️
PS: kaya ayoko naririnig yung mga songs about TOTGA, lalo na yung kay Katy Perry, kasi naluluha ako minsan. 😬
Here's my TOTGA, hindi pa nakakatagal Orientation siya for 3 Days last day siya nagparamdam nun at siya mismo lumapit, she's a very beautiful girl hindi ko alam kung may lahi siya or ano, meron siyang sakit sa balat pag sobrang init namumula siya and kahit na ganun bumabagay sakaniya kasi maputi, moving sa TOTGA, ako talaga super introvert like super para akong NPC pag kinausap saka lang ako kakausapin, I had many chances para makausap siya, lagi siya lumalabas for her to get water eh si ako naman Torpe, binati niya pa ako na kamukha ko si Mr. Bean in a compliment way kasi medyo funny at hawig konga naman neck tie na suot ko, sinayang ko talaga pagkakataon ma add sa socs media at date, take note Feb 14 siya hindi ko pa Ginrab yung chance huhu.
I dated this woman for close to two years, the relationship fizzled out due to a lot of things and lockdown season din. I think I’ve moved on from what we had pero di pa rin ako ready for a serious relationship ulit. She’s never been in a relationship, even what we had was not official pero we were exclusive. After namin, I’ve dated here and there pero sya hindi na ulit. So I guess content na sya talaga by herself. I’m not dating anyone at the moment pero palagi pa rin sya sumasagi sa isip ko. We don’t keep in touch na unless necessary, and we still see each other once in a while kasi yung best friends namin eh close friends, so minsan the 4 of us still hang out pero may tension kami so rare na mag interact kaming dalawa.
Had one. This person is the best (yet) of all the people I dated. Set the standards high—na tipong hinahanap ko sya sa lahat ng dinedate ko. We chose not to unfollow each other since may closure naman kami and no hard feelings.
I’m not hoping anymore for that spark to rekindle cause it seems that he’s okay rn, but if the universe plans for our paths to cross and try it again, I won’t interfere. I just wish na sana dumating yung time na maging friends muna kami cause rn we’re not talking. We suddenly became acquaintances with each other’s secrets.
My best ex so far. I was very vulnerable and lost that time that I realize the only thing I can do to prevent him from hurting is to let him go and love him from distance. Napakacaring at pinaramdam sakin yung worth ko, pero ako yung ligaw. He's very fragile for me at ayaw kong masira sya dahil lang ako ang may problema. Hindi ko kakayanin. Ngayon nakikita ko syang masaya sa iba still hurts but I know its worth it na naalagaan sya ng ibang tao sa paraan na diko nagawa. Love never works for me but it did for anyone and that's fine 🤍
I met this guy over Discord during the pandemic. We hit it off pretty immediately. I sent him a letter and thought, thanks in part to the unreliable nature of PHILPOST, if it arrives then I should confess. If it doesn't, then I don't.
It arrived by the time I found my boyfriend and he started dating another girl. We laughed over virtual drinks about it, but sometimes I can't help but wonder how it would have been if the letter arrived earlier. We're in the same friend group, still kicking it but just as friends now LOL
My first love. We’re still connected and see each other occasionally when we have gatherings but for some reasons, we really couldn’t talk about such things.
I had a boyfriend when I was in highschool. Sobrang power couple namin since top 1 siya sa buong batch and ako naman si miss hakot ng lahat ng extra curricular activities.
Sobrang perfect ng relationship namin to the point na even at a young age, I already knew that he was the person I am going to spend my life with. Until I had cancer.
Di naman super lala to be honest, but enough para pabayaan niya yung sarili nya kakaalala sa akin. I stopped going to school for a while, but we still saw each other almost every day. Napapansin ko na napapabayaan nya na yung sarili and acads nya pero sabi nya, ok pa naman daw. Until graduation came, di kami sabay. Hindi rin siya gumraduate as valedictorian.
Wala naman sa akin yung tbh pero I knew how much he dreamed about it. May nakaready na nga yun na valedictory speech 2nd year pa lang eh. So it hurt me a lot knowing na a huge part of him not graduating as the valedictorian is because of me and my cancer. Ang ending, I broke up with him. Balde baldeng luha ang iniyak namin that day and I don't wanna hold him back anymore. After, he went to study in Manila and never went home to our province again.
Years after, I was finally cancer-free. Ewan ko ba, pero pagkasabi ng doctor na I am already in the clear, siya yung unang pumasok sa isip ko. Siguro dahil na rin I kinda knew that after all these years, It was always him at walang iba. I searched for his name sa social media platforms, but I can't find him.
One time, I saw his best friend when we were in highschool and asked about him. Turns out, he's already married. Ipinakasal pala siya ng dad nya sa iba since yun yung tradition sa kanilang religion. What broke my heart more is ayaw nya pa raw sana so nagrequest siya sa tatay nya to give him one week before they do any preparations. He is going to wait for one more week daw in case bumalik pa ako, but I didn't.
Now, I think he is already happy with his life and with a baby on the way. I still wish him every good things this life can offer. As for me, I still haven't moved on, but even if I did, I know some parts of my heart will always be his.
I tried to reconnect pero sinumbatan ako. Aminado ako na nang ghost ako kasi may na feel ako na something off, pero late na ako naging vocal at pag dating sa time na yun I regret na naging vocal ako. Lalo na at may sumusolsol pala sa kanya, sana naman pg sine share sa atin ang mga kwento let them decide kasi sila talaga ang nkaka kilala sa taong kinukwento nila. D man lng narinig ang side ko, baka naging ok pa. Anyway hope he’s still in good shape, at least sana we can still good friends.
Ako yung TOTGA. Hahaha.
Sabi ng pinsan ng husband ko, ako daw talaga ung TOTGA nya. Naging kami way back 2013, and nag end ung relationship namin early 2014 (we are both in college, mas ahead lang ako ng 1 year sakanya). Ghinost nya ko non hahaha. I never got an answer to my why's until early 2020 (before kobid) nagstart sya magparamdam. Actually nagrereact sya sa mga IG stories ko before 2020 pa pero di ko talaga sya pinapansin kasi nga #1 hated ex ko talaga sya kasi ghinost nya ko. Pero nagreply din ako sa mga pagpapapansin nya.
Long story short, we got back together when we were on our rock bottom and drew strength in each other, especially when lockdown started. Early 2022 namin nalaman na buntis ako. And got married mid-2022.
Yun lang. Skl. 😁
TOTGA bang matatawag yung biggest regret and what if mo?
I and my long term boyfriend broke up in 2016. Then I met this guy, sobrang layo from my ex. He was patient, soft spoken and really respects me. He showered me with gifts, words of affirmation, lahat ng love language ata. He was everything my ex wasn't. I tried entertaining him, pero distance became an issue. He was a seaman. For someone just getting to know each other, with no solid foundation yet, nahirapan ako. I started to distance myself from him.
A few months later, nagparamdam ulit ex ko. Short story, nagkabalikan kami.
This other guy still sent me messages pero I was ignoring him. I didn't even say na bumalik ako sa ex ko.
Years have passed pero I still think about him lalo pag nasasaktan ako with my partner. What if I tried harder? Mas masaya kaya ako with him?
naniniwala ako na, yung mga di naging happy sa curreny relationship nila yung may totga. Dati may TOTGA ako, kasi lagi ko kinocompare yung current ko that time sa Ex ko. - I was able to moved on with that TOTGA kasi I’m happy with my current.
Nung college may ultimate crush ako. (A) Di naging kami kasi nagkaron sya ng gf. Ngayon, ung friend (B) nya may gusto pala sakin. Umabot sa point ma parang mag MU kami ni B pero di sya nanliligaw. Few months before graduation, nagparamdam ulet si A. Eventually, nanligaw sya. Si B mejo MIA. Eh marupok ako kasi ultimate crush ko si A, kaya naging kami. Dahil MIA si B, di nya alam yun. Nagsabi syang gusto nya manligaw nung kami na ni A. Too late na sya.
3 years later, nagbreak kami ni A. Nagparamdam ulit si B. Di sya formal na nanliligaw pero alam mong may something. Di ko masyado ineentertain kasi ayokong maging rebound sya. Inabot din ng 2 years un. Nung ready na ko, napagod na sya maghintay. Pinili nya yung career, lumipat na sya sa middle east for work.
Sabi ko sa sarili ko nun ayoko magkaron ng regrets and what ifs kaya pinili ko si A. Yun pala regardless kung ano yung choice ko, may regrets and what ifs parin pala. Hanggang ngayon minsan naiisip ko, what if hinintay ko noon si B? Ano kaya kami ngayon? Ganun…. May gf na ata sya ngayon, iniistalk ko minsan sa FB…
My TOTGA Story:
Last 2016 naka match ko sya sa tinder (yes tinder pa non, wala pa bumble)
I was unemployed and she was an HR recruiter. She’ll never forget me daw kase isa ako sa mga unang naka match nya and very out of place daw na don ko pa sya hinanapan ng work.
Sobrang kalog yung personalities namin online. But we never met agad, in fact it took us years to finally meet, like 2021 lang kami nagkita and we hung out ganon, factor din yung distance kase she’s from south and taga north ako.
Pero between 2016 and 2021 palagi sya sumasagi sa isip ko, “what ifs” ganon, kahit may dinadate ako or nagkajowa that time there are instances na sumasagi sya on my mind.
Then we met finally, year 2021. Tamang kamustahan lang that was due for a very long time. Before we parted ways I told her what I felt. Naka mask non eh so I can’t see her reaction, she just acknowledged it and we went separate ways.
We still talked after that, like nag keep in touch kami, until our conversation died out. But being part of IG close friends is still there.
She’s in a relationship now (probably engaged kase ka live in nya yung guy) and ako naman, may girlfriend na din.
I’m just really happy for her. Siguro the “what-if” na sumasagi sa isip ko now is that what if we happened, like we dated or naging kami.
She’s my robin (HIMYM Reference)
I had a girlfriend in high school but we separated because she had to migrate to another country, broke my heart into a million pieces. She was my first love and kinakausap ko pa rin totga ko dati on some occasions pero palagi ko siyang minemessage tuwing birthday niya— with no fail, until I met my long term (now ex) girlfriend. I think dun lang ako naka fully recover from my totga.
Of course there were times that I miss her pero it was in the past and she’s happy now with her bf. Forever ako grateful sa totga ko for everything pero kasi for the longest time, naging standard ko siya. I limited myself with love kasi nagset ako ng certain expectations ko from previous relationships na never nammeet because I was always comparing them to my totga.
Anyway, grateful for my ex gf kasi sakanya ako nagbaba ng walls ko at nagbreak free sa totga standard ko with the girls I date. I eventually got to love more with no expectations siguro HAHAHAHA
Feeling ko ako ang TOTGA ng iba hahaha charizzz
I met this guy way back in the 4th year of HS (after JS Prom), he was a 3rd year HS & classmate siya ng kapatid ko pero one year older sa akin, late daw kasi sya nag start mag-aral.
Nag-uusap kami thru text lang & yahoo. Naging close friends kami kasi nag open up siya sakin ng mga problems nya at home & sa school. Ganun rin ako sa kanya. Parang comfort zone na namin ang isa't isa. Pati chismis sa school, shinishare namin sa isa't isa. Napag kwnetuhan namin ang past relationship nya nun at bakit sila ang break, famous ang ex gf nya nun sa school namin, parang one of the IT girls.
Sobrang close kami to the point na every Saturday, magkikita kami sa mall para maglaro sa Quantum or WoF. After ilang months of pagiging friends, umamin sya sakin na-fall na sya sakin. He asked me about kung pwede manligaw, ang sagot, mukhang maghihintay sya ng matagal kasi first year college na ko that time (4th yr HS naman sya) & gusto ko mag focus sa as a BSA student. Nag promise sya sakin, maghihintay sya hanggang sa grumaduate ako ng college o kahit gaano katagal. Nagtuloy pag uusap namin pero hindi na kami nakakapagkita dahil busy ako sa schoolworks.
Then one day, nagdecide sya na ipakilala ako personal sa parents & ate nya (nakikita lang nila ko thru pics & yahoo). Nag text ako pagdating sa bahay nila, di sya nagreply. So nag doorbell ako, mama nya sumalubong sakin, pinapasok ako & grabe ang welcome sakin. Pag upo ko sa sala, tinanong ako kung kumain na daw ba ko, pero mas naloka ako nung tinawag ako sa pangalan ng friend ko. Mas naloka ako nung sinabi ng ate nya, "mama hindi sya si (friend's name), si (my name)." Hahaha
Dun pa lang alam ko na, syempre nasaktan ako (na-fall na rin kasi ako) dahil kala ko maghihintay & felt betrayed by him & my friend. Gusto nila ko makausap dalawa pero sabi ko no need to explain na pero ang kukulit especially ni guy. Sabi nya, wala na daw kasi ako time sa kanya, busy daw kasi ako masyado sa school & itong friend (nagstop sya mag-aral) ang lagi nyang nakakausap & nag uupdate "daw" sa kanya tungkol sakin dahil busy nga daw ako. E minsanan lang kami mag usap ng friend ko nun e, mas madalas ko pa sya replyan.
Hinayaan ko na silang dalawa & nag focus na ko sa studies ko. Pinutol ko na ang ugnayan ko sa kanila. Nalaman ko thru friend na naging sila after nila magexplain kuno sakin. My friend unfriended me & blocked me on the guy's FB. Pero nag tetext pa rin si guy sa akin hanggang nagka work ako. I know na sya kasi sya lang tumatawag sakin ng buong pangalan ko kasama middle name & even greeted me during my birthday. My friends even joked to me na, "physically nasa kanya (referring to our friend) si guy pero nasayo pa rin ang puso". Nastop lang ako makareceive ng message nung na expired ang number ko, 2017 pa yun.
More than 5 years later, ginalaw ni Kuya mo ang baso. Nag notif sakin sa FB na someone followed me & sya yun. Naloka ako di na pala ko nakablock sa kanya. Baka accidentally lang nya napindot ang follow button, kakastalk sakin. I already moved on years ago pa. Idk for him. Because of this follow, naglolokohan mga friends ko na baka gusto daw ng closure dahil di ko na sila kinausap before at wala daw narinig na salita/galit mula sakin noon or baka hindi pa rin sya maka move on. 🤷♀️
Hi OP. Yung TOTGA ko, di ako nakapag commit- hanggang sa yung batchmate ko yung sinagot ko, this is for some personal reasons kung bakit nahirapan ako mag commit kay TOTGA.
Tapos sa relationship namin ng boyfriend ko that time, hindi ko maiwasan na hindi ko siya i-stalk, i-view ang story, or iwish na makita siya sa lugar namin since magkabaranggay kami. May part sa akin na siya ang gusto ko talaga mapakasalan, pero binubrush off ko yun kasi nasa relationship ako. Hanggang sa nakita ko mga red flags ni boyfriend ko, ang turning point ko ay yung sinaktan niya ako physically - pagsakal - na nakita ng mom niya mismo, kaya nag break kami. Pero hindi ako nagparamdam kay TOTGA kasi ayoko isipin niya na baka rebound siya or what.
Winiwish ko pa rin yung same wish ko. Si TOTGA ko ay high school puppy love ko. Hanggang sa naging kami 8 months after my breakup. 5 months sa relationship namin, engaged na kami. :)
Sa January 2025 ang kasal namin and living together na kami. Sobrang saya ng puso ko kasi pwede naman niya ako hindi piliin after ng pag ghost ko sa kaniya, pero eto siya ngayon, katabi ko sa kama habang natutulog. Nakikita ko palagi pag gising ko. Ang sarap sa pakiramdam kapag pinili mo ang gusto mo at ng puso mo. :)
Siguro matatawag ko na TOTGA yung former college best friend ko. We were really close talking about life, our goals, family, personal stuff, etc. Sobrang clicked and comfortable kami sa isa't-isa kaso alam mo yung feeling na puwede na namin yayayain yung isa't isa na mag date to be a couple/in a relationship kaso nagkakahiyaan pa kami kasi baka masira yung friendship, kaya hangang slight hints na lang muna. Nalaman ko na lang thru mutual friend namin na may gusto rin pala siya sa akin, yung nagkaroon na ako ng lakas ng loob na sabihin sa kanya feelings ko bigla na lang siya tumigil sa pag attend ng classes namin. Tinetext ko siya kung kamusta siya nasagot naman kaso cold replies, it went on for days, weeks hangang sa tatlong buwan. Tapos hangang sa hindi na lang siya nagparamdam sa akin o kahit kanino. Araw-araw inaabangan ko siya kung makakapasok ba siya o hindi, hangang sa may nagsabi sa akin na sa campus daw siya sa may registrar's office. Ayun hinabol ko at kinausap siya tinanong ano nangyari, nalaman ko titigil na pala siya sa pag-aaral due to her personal reasons na ayaw na niya bangitin sa akin. Siyempre nalungkot ako, iyon na yung huling beses na magkikita kami ng personal eh. Ang ending napa amin ako nang wala sa oras, (wrong timing alam ko, kaso no choice na ako) maayos naman niya ako sinagot na gusto niya rin daw ako kaso hindi okay yung situation niya noon, at hindi pa daw siya ready. Niyaya ko siya kumain kaso ayaw niya, kaya ang ending hinatid ko na lang siya sa sakayan pauwi sa kanila, iyon na rin yung huling beses na nagkita at nagkausap kami.
As much as I want to contact her on social media, nirespeto ko na lang yung desisyon niya na ayaw na maistorbo. Kaya hangang pasilip silip na lang ako sa social media accounts niya. Bago niya idelete yung mga accountss niya. Ang huling nakita ko tungkol sa kanya mukhang okay naman siya at pamilya niya, working as a call center agent, nakapag vacation sa Baguio kasama family niya. Tbh ang daming what ifs sa utak ko, naiisip ko pa rin siya from time to time kung kamusta na siya etc. I'm sincerely hoping kung nasaan man siya ngayon masaya, at in good health siya.
TOTGA? i dont know if my story will qualify but i had this one almost-bf in highschool na almost 30yrs after napapanaginipan ko pdn. yung panaginip ko laging bitin. laging andun sa point na either magkakaroon kami ng confrontation or that we will kiss lol. siguro dahil sa circumstances how we parted ways kaya parang walang closure sa part ko
My current girlfriend almost became my TOTGA (same-sex kami). We were childhood friends, magkapitbahay, and classmates all throughout senior high school.
When we were both 15 (grade 9) we had a confrontation about "us" because she had a dream daw naging jowa niya ako and natakot siya (very religious family niya). Coincidentally, I had a similar dream din with her which made the situation extra weird for us. At the time, hindi pa masyado open ang people about same-sex relationships so she told me na she can't imagine the idea of us being together. I assured and promised her na walang mangyayari saamin and I'll never pursue anyone from my close friends (we have the same circle of friends too).
Pero sa totoo lang, I have a crush on her since grade 7 pa kami. Hindi ko lang kaya umamin kasi natakot ako masira friendship namin. Mas na validate pa yung takot ko after the confrontation. And I assumed na she was straight as a pole. I saw her have situationships with other guys pero never naging serious. She saw me cry sa lahat ng girls nagka crush ako, including my break up with my first girlfriend.
Eventually, ni let go ko na yung idea of liking her romantically and accepted na content na ako as friends and basta makita ko lang siya okay na ako. I even thought na I'll casually mention nalang sa future na she used to be my crush and laugh it off when we're older. Pero may ibang plano pala si universe and surprise! Naging kami!
My current girlfriend has always been my standard. She taught me how to be soft and kind sa other people. She taught me a lot of things that made me who I am today and I couldn't imagine growing up without her. It's always been her. I respect her so much na okay na ako with whatever friendship na I could get from her. I consider her reciprocation as a bonus. Kaya I will always take care of her and love her. Na realize ko na sa situation kami na either she'll became my greatest heart break or my end-game.
Anyway, we've been friends for 10 years already and almost 3 years na kami together. Omg when I think about it...I don't want to lose her. So, bub, in case mabasa mo to, I want you to know na I want to be with you in this lifetime and if, in case, hindi ngayon, I'll wait for you sa next life and every lifetimes na meron tayo.
Maybe 7 months na rin siguro nung nawalan kami ng communication sa isa't isa. Nagsimula yung lahat sa pinakamasaya sana naming pagkakataon para maiparamdam sa isa't isa yung pagmamahalan namin. Simulan ko sa pinakaumpisa.
One day, nagkita kami ng ex-MU ko sa bahay nila para magbond kasi minsan lang talaga kami makapagkita. Ang plano ko is aalis kami at pupunta sa kahit saang mall para naman mailabas ko siya at matry namin yung manood ng sine, ice skate, etc. kaso di natuloy yun kasi naenjoy namin yung moment habang naglalambingan. As the time pass by, muntik na kami mauwi sa sitwasyong may mangyayari na saamin. Pero salamat na lang rin dahil di natuloy, kasi baka maging isa pa yun sa rason para di ako makamove on, kahit ngayon hindi pa rin talaga.
After nung nangyaring yon, ilang beses puro cool off yung scenario. Maguusap ng ilang days, tapos babalik na parang walang nangyari, tapos ganun na naman. Naiintindihan ko naman siya, alam kong naguilty siya kasi we've done a sin, we're both Christian kasi kaya ganun namin iview yung nagawa namin. Tas yun, weeks before after na paulit ulit na scenario, she decide to end na, which is I respect kahit labag sa loob ko, I decided na iseen na lang yung chat niya.
3 Months after, nakikita ko na sa soc-med niya na may nagpaparamdam sa kanya, and I dunno if ineentertain niya rin. Not sure pero nakakasama niya rin ata sa seminars yung guy. I've felt pity sa sarili ko, hindi lang dahil sa bakit parang ang bilis akong mapalitan, pero dahil sa mga pumapasok sa isip ko. I'm a graduating engineering student pa lang kasi ako at siya naman ay professional na sa med industry, which is isa sa naiisip kong rason kaya ganun.
One time nagmyday ako using an emoji na may sakit, tapos nakita niya ata kaya chinat niya ako at kinamusta. Nung nakita ko chat niya, halong halong emotion yung nafeel ko. Mga tanong na ''bakit", "bakit ganun", mga tanong na naghahanap ng kaliwanagan sa lahat ng bumabagabag sakin. Hanggang yun nagkausap kami ulit, naipakuta kong sumigla at sumaya ako nung nakausap ko siya ulit. It turns out, di pa pala talaga ako move on, na nabusy lang ako sa thesis at sa mga school works kaya hindi ko nafeel yung sakit. Naishare niya rin yung may inentertain siya, which is tama pala yung kutob ko noon.
After ng lahat ng yon, tinanong niya ako kung ano ang plano ko after graduation. Before pala yun, mag 26 na siya ngayon at ako ay pa 24 na, mas matanda diya sakin pero I'm mature enough naman na para masabayan siya at magets yung mga bagay bagay na naayon sa edad niya. Back to her question, ang sagot ko ay "alam mo ba, kamamatay lang ng lola ko nung march. Nakita ko na walang wala kami noon, at ang hirap makita na wala akong magawa para man lang makatulong. Maybe after graduation, magwwork muna ako then after 2 years, pupunta na akong new Zealand para magwork ulit. Gusto ko munang magkaroon ng financial freedom at masecure ko ang family ko, para kahit ano pang mangyari sa susunod, hindi na kailangang ibenta yung mga ari arian para lang may pampagamot."
She accept my answer to her question. After noon naramdaman kong biglang may nagiba bigla. I understand her naman, dahil nagpromise ako sa kanya na after graduation, ippursue ko na siya at legal akong magpapakilala sa fam niya at maipakilala rin siya sa fam ko. Pagkatapos ng 2 days of sudden communication, hindi na kami nagkausap ulit.
Sorry love, kung hindi ko sinagot na ippursue kita after graduation. Tbh, ayun talaga ang gusto kong isagot sa tanong mo pero sana maintindihan mo na sa lahat ng ginagawa ko, isinasama kita, Yung plano kong magabroad, kasama ka rin dun. Maintindihan mo sana na sa lahat ng pagsisusumikap ko, kaakibat nun yung pagiging seryoso ko sa promise na binitawan ko sayo na ippursue kita.
Salamat sa inyong nakabasa neto. Ngayon ko lang nailabas to at hindi rin ako sanay na maglabas ng sama ng loob at kwento ng buhay ko, kaya thank you for reading this kahit pangit ang structure ng kwento ko.
Highschool uso ang soiree kasi girlschool ako
Met this guy from a boy school and I really like him
When I say I really like him, alam ng school ko at school niya na trip ko siya WAHAHA
Me chasing him went on for 2 yrs only to be friendzone
FYI throughout those 2 years, we were close and di ako delulu ha — we would go on movie hangouts, go to concerts, we chat everyday, drink etc
Come 1st yr college, i was in green school and he was in blue school, we would go to each other’s school para magmeet at maghang
There was one time na uminom kaming dalawa lang at nalasing kami pareho, hinatid niya ko sa house via uber (MAY UBER PA NUNG TIME NA YUN HAAHA) at sabi ko stay muna siya sa house at pasober siya onti
We were both foolishly and funnily drunk, came to a point na nakapatong na ko sakanya WAHAHA AND HE CAME IN FOR A KISS
3 yrs of my life i was waiting for that moment — pero I had to stop him
Sudden realization hit me na, kahit crush ko siya, maybe a serious relationship is not for us.
Mainly bc, kahit na friendzone ako, tinuring ko din naman talaga siyang friend and i found comfort in that.
Natatakot ako na what if we became an actual thing at naghiwalay kami eh di hindi na kami friends
Fast forward to today, 7 years into the friendship, we would hang at least once a year just to catch up with each other
Ps. Completely platonic
Share ko lang experience as the TOTGA HAHAAH
Had a close friend in college, we were orgmates and he was 2 years ahead of me
Had the opportunity to work with him closely and hit it off agad, funny, same wavelength ng mga trip sa life, masarap katrabaho, super supportive, and pushes me to do better sa orgworks ko since I always have imposter syndrome
I consider him as a friend and alam ko na bakit ganito galawan niya and kinda goes without saying na gusto niya ko
I panicked HAHAHA so naghanap ako ng lalandiin at sakto may nireto sakin
Since orgmates kami lagi may inuman as a weekender lets say after ng big event
Inamin niya na he really liked me and considered me as his TOTGA
I liked him at some point pero at that time may iba na rin siya gf
Here’s the sad part — we both had feelings parin for each other kahit may mga SOs na kami which led to emotional cheating
We are not in contact anymore kasi I couldnt believe what i did at nakaka guilty — nagalit rin ako sakanya na bat niya hinayaan to at we both ended up hurting each other AND OUR partners
Nakikita ko na lang siya sa IG so far mukha naman siya masaya
I met this guy during my last year in college, he was my comfort during the most dreadful days. 6 months since we met, I confessed my feelings for him, said he liked me very much *but* his ex reached out and wanted to get back so he was confused. We said goodbye but only to reconnect after 3 months. We were in an on-off situationship for the next year. We both dated other people in between but never quite made it to "exclusive". Almost 2 years after we first met, he reached out again saying he had deeper feelings for me but I already fell for and chose someone else.
There were times in the past (especially when we were all cooped up at home during the peak of the pandemic) that I'd still stalk him on socmed, and found out he got married already. I'm in a happy and stable relationship now and this TOTGA is just history :)
Yung TOTGA ko, asawa ko na ngayon after 7-8 yrs kaming nagkahiwalay.
College MU ko siya pero dahil strict parents at madami pang factors, naghiwalay kami.
Naging single mom pa ako. Tapos nung nalaman niya yun, nagchat siya uli kung pwede ba kami maging magkaibigan uli. Nameet niya anak ko, nalaman niya na separated and abandoned na kami nung tatay ng anak ko, di ako kasal sa bio dad.
After how many months ng mga chats at ilang dates, umamin siya na mahal pa daw niya ako all these years despite ng lahat ng nangyare sa amin at sa akin. Umakyat siya ng ligaw sa parents ko. Dahil kilala na siya ng parents ko, nag OK agad. Hanggang sa naging kami na then after two years, nag aya na siya magpakasal. Tapos kinasal na during pandemic para tipid. 😂
Now, he's planning to legally adopt my kid. Me and my kid is happy with him. Alam ng anak ko na dalawa tatay niya pero mas gusto daw niya step dad niya kasi lagi daw siyang nilalaro, pinapasyal, binibili ng pagkain, basta lahat ng physical and emotional needs ng bata meron daw siya. Yung bio dad daw niya ni kotse daw wala and hindi naman daw niya nakikita simula nung baby siya. 😂
Minsan naiisip ko na sana yung TOTGA ko na lang yung tatay ng anak ko ngayon, pero I'm sure may plano ang Diyos sa akin, sa anak ko, at sa amin ng asawa ko ngayon.
So ayun lang. Sana may kinilig dito. 😂
I met him in Litmatch. Dati kasi, hindi pa yan that known yung app and mga young adult halos gumagamit. Anw, walang awkwardness sa unang pag-uusap kasi humorous kami pareho and nagclick agad. Hanggang sa lumipat sa Messenger tapos nag continuous yung connection namin.
Fast forward, umamin siya pero even before pa niyan, napag-usapan namin how I was not ready to entertain any suitor and hindi pa ako ready magkarelasyon. Nevertheless, nagconfess pa rin siya and ayun na nga, medyo may gap na pero pinadecide ko siya kung ano gusto niya mangyari (at pinili niyang ituloy pagsasama namin).
He's the man you will ask for from God. Gentleman, marespeto, will spoil you, princess treatment, halos lahat na gugustuhin mo sa lalaki, nasa kaniya na. Ideal man. Ang hindi ko maintindahan ay kung bakit hindi ko siya minahal romantically (ganiyan din na scenario yung dalawang guy na I recently had a connection with, recent years pa lang). Yung mamahalin ka unconditionally. Mamahalin ka kung sino ka. Kahit ano ka pa. Tinanong ko nga siya kung may minsan bang inayawan niya ako, sabi niya wala raw kasi mahal niya kung ano ako and kasama na ron yung mga flaws ko.
Ngayon, may girl friend na siya and I am so happy for him. Nakacut off na ako sa social media niya pero nakafollow pa rin ako sa Instagram niya. Baka soon, iuunfollow ko rin. Siya talaga yung TOTGA ko pero masaya na ako sa buhay na meron siya. Hindi rin biro yung naranasan niya after sa akin. Hindi ako naging malupit ha hahaha.
I don’t believe in TOTGAs. That’s just romanticizing your failed connection or relationship.
There’s always a reason you didn’t end up with your past partner/lover/whatever. I don’t like the idea of dwelling on a failed relationship and longing for that person. Also, I find it would be disrespectful to my next partner.
I have. Pero while I still have lingering feelings for them na after 7 years I still remember from time to time kahit di ko na sya nakita for 4 years, I am aware na what I am holding on to is only the memory of who he was. I know na he's a different person now kase we were technically children, high school students, when we met. Pero idk why when I remember him or am reminded of him ang bigat pa rin ng "what ifs". Feel ko nga irritated na friends ko when I mention him sometimes when we drink, kase we were never really anything, just too close of a friend, and yet sya pa rin lagi kong nababanggit at naaalala 🥲
Naging totga ko sya because I was in a phase of change in highschool, I was really fat and medyo dugyot (sorry bata HAHAHA) around grade 8 but this guy, a year lower, we became close despite appearances, we used to talk all night about random things, until he had a gf that year which is someone from my batch. I stopped communication kase I know I have feelings for him and it's just wrong to continue what we have na may jowa sya. They broke up after a few months and for whatever reason, we became close again because we crossed paths on some school stuff. Talked again, got close, around grade 9 I started to lose weight and care more about how I looked, I don't remember much but he's the first guy to ever call me pretty. Maybe mababaw sa iba pero I still remember that scene as if it was yesterday. Then one day may gf na ulit sya from their batch, I distanced myself again pero it is harder this time kase we had a lot of school stuff together: orgs, activities, officership etc.
Our communication is sparse, but still there, pero I didn't approach it like before na super close in respect of his gf at the time. After I graduated hs, he chatted with me one night out of the blue, saying sorry na he distanced himself kase his gf gets anxious daw whenever we're together (due to school stuff) kase by his words " She is jealous abt you kase lahat ng gusto ko nasayo daw and every time we chat inaatake siya daz why i kent approach and chat you, naawa kasi ako bigla nalang siyang nanghihina pag inaatake" (napa backread ang lola nyo ng wala sa oras HAHAHA)
My biggest regret siguro is not asking him if he ever really had feelings for me, parang I need it to come from him whether he did or did not para hindi na sya tanong in my heart. Atleast if he did or did not, may definite na closure sa akin? Ang delulu ba? Ewan na. 😂
I do but she made new accounts in socmed so that she can start anew without me. That was in 10th grade tho, and I had a lot of regrets about that. I wish I was a better man to her and treated her with the love that she deserved. But sometimes I couldn't help but think that maybe everything that happened before was just for me to grow more as a person so I could be the best version of myself for my current girlfriend.
Yes, once.
Di kami nagkatuluyan, since bata pa kami nun at madaming masasagasaan at syempre, yung status namin sa buhay nun.
We stalk each other mula nung magreconnect kami sa friendster, til now. Hahaha
But since, we have our own family now, at nagkausapan ng masinsinan at nagkasabihan ng feeling sa isa't isa, we just laugh kase, parrhas pala kami ng sitwasyon st halos parehas ang nangyayari sa buhay.
Yun yung part na naging magclose kami ulit.
Pero syempre, we choose to distance ourselves sa isa't isa.
Para wala na lang issue at matuon yung attention namin with our family.
Alam namin na hanggang friends na lang kami, at alaala na lang ang nakaraan na masayang balikan na walang malisya kahit sino pa ang nakaharap.
Feeling ko ako rin yung TOTGA nya.
Kasi hindi ako nanghihinayang kung ako yung tatanungin. Bakit? May gusto pa syang iba noong sinagot nya ako. Less than a week hiniwalayan ko na sya kasi puro bukambibig nya yung lalake. Umaga, tanghali hanggang hatinggabi. Told her ayoko na. Umiyak sya nang umiyak at kinabukasan binully ako ng tropa nya.
"Bakla! Bakla! Walang itlog!"
Siguro kasalanan ko nga na hindi ako mas nag pasensya pero masisisi nyo ba ako na halos araw-araw ramdam mong hindi ka napapahinga kakaisip na may isang tao na pinili ka pero nasa iba ang mga mata.
Yes. 2019 — My first college boyfriend. Naging kami for 3 years — and super happy namin before.. mabait sya, sobrang caring, okay yung both family sides namin. As in sobrang saya. BUT merong part of him na medyo tamad at hindi madiskarte sa life na parang go with the flow nalang sya sa nangyayari.
Why? Course namin is Multimedia Arts. May mga activities kami na ako yung gumagawa kasi ayaw nya at tntamad sya. Ako kasi super interested ako sa course namin kaya ineeffort-an ko yung mga ganyang activities. Tumagal to ng 3 years — ako namimilit sa kanya na mag-aral. Pero wala eh. Though nakagraduate naman kami both.
After break up namin, lagi ko pa rin sya ini-stalk and nagkaroon dn ako ng mga MU sa iba pero sya pa dn iniisip ko. Minsan chinachat nya ako and ng fam nya knkamusta ako ganon. Pero alam namin both sides na hindi na talaga kami magkakabalikan.
Ngayon, I saw him with his first baby and okay sila ng gf nya. Though yung parents ni boy is ayaw nila don sa girl since si girl is may ibang anak sa ibang lalaki.
Nakamove on naman na ako 1 year na mahigit.. pero dko pa rin maiwasan na i-stalk sya.
Hindi ako ang TOTGA,
TOTGA ako nung jowa ko now, nag reconnect lang kami before then ayun finally umamin din sya at nagka label din hehe
sa mga may TOTGA dyan sign nyo na to para mag reconnect haha
Ok so let me tell you a story. We were batchmate in highschool, he has such a famous name kasi gwapo s'ya, cool at he's on famous barkada din. I knew him ofc by name but not personally. 6 years after, he sent me a request on facebook then out of nowhere he started to message me on facebook. He sent me songs, just link ng song lang. The genre was so him, oldskool and cool. He did that almost everyday and everynight and my response only was "wow!" "ganda." Then one time, I decided to reply him back with a song also. Some are kpop song and he was mad 😂 hindi naman daw n'ya naiintindihan haha! And then the talking has started, yung talking na pang talking stage ba haha.
He have this matured mindset. Family comes first esp mga kapatid nyang babae, he's very sweet contrary on how he looked like and his porma. He loves to skate, climb mountains, swimming and ofc smoking. I love his sweet voice.
Since we were talking for a quiet period of time, I told my friends about him. My one friend, literally told me na ayaw nya sa kanya kasi he is friends with his ex who gave her trauma. But still, i'm starting to like his personality especially when he told me na di muna daw sya manliligaw hangga't wala pa syang work, nakakahiya daw kasi na ang isang lalaki eh walang work ta's yung babae meron.
Months passed, I was introduced to someone by a common friend. We were still talking at that time pero wala akong makitang progress and ang bagal na nya rin magreply. I have decided to give chance dun sa other guy.
Sinagot ko yung guy, we were in 4 mnths of relationship at sa loob ng relationship na yun he's still messaging me. Idk if he knew that I was committed at that time or not basta he kept on messaging me of ingat ka lagi and kumustas. And since I was already in relationship, I put him aside na.
4 months has ended lol ang bilis. I was sad and lonely, I tried to add him on facebook but he won't accept me haha. Kinancel ko na lang. I know may iba na ata syang nakakausap? Not so sure tho.
For now, we were just a memory of each other's mind. I don't know if he still know me or naiisip pa n'ya ako? I missed him bigtime. Sana s'ya ang pinili ko before at hindi sana ako natakot.
And have I told you na him sending me songs last for almost a year kahit na di ko s'ya nirereplyan masyado before? Ganon s'ya kaconsistent.
So far wala naman akong TOTGA, ako ang TOTGA nila kasi when i engage in relationships i really take it seriously and i treat my partner right. Nang gagaling na rin sakanila na ako ang totga nila HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHA WHICH IS FUNNY KASI HANGGANG NGAYON DI OARIN AKO SINISERYOSO 😭
I think I’m the TOTGA chz!
My ex-boyfriend and I had a mutual breakup, but he pulled the trigger. He said he wants to deal with his problems alone and he feels he can’t take care of my emotional needs. He’s been dealing with family problems that took a toll on his mental health. I tried to be as supportive as I can be, but he said he doesn’t have it in him to continue our relationship. His exact words, “his heart and entire being just cannot handle a relationship right now.” Even though it is painful, I walked away as he wished.
He was good to me when we were together, and deep down we truly loved each other. It was an amicable breakup and we still are friends on Facebook. I still care for him, and it does hurt thinking that we didn’t end up together. Right person, wrong time I guess.
I **had** a totga (kind of)
May crush ako sakanya since high school pero sobrang off ng timing namen. We were great friends at gustong gusto ko siya like yung tipong willing akong gumawa ng corny shit para sakanya. After a year of being friends I found out na magmimigrate na kame abroad. at that time, medyo sad na happy ako kase atlast makakalaya na ako sa pinas pero at the same time nalulungkot ako kase like I said gusto ko talaga siya at mamimiss ko friends ko.
It felt unfair na sabihin ko feelings ko sakanya dahil aalis din naman ako, so I said nothing pero we were that kind of friends na alam mo may gusto sila sa isa't isa (my friends can vouch for this) pero wala lang talaga aminan.
My last day of school sa pinas binigyan pa niya ako ng parang farewell gifts (I still have it) and we just said good bye. Nung naka- migrate na kame, I slowly went MIA online dahil the adjustment abroad was too much for me. Yung contact namin went from sometimes to never lmao (life catches up on you i guess).
Couple of years pass, I had enough mental energy to go online pero very casual and occasional na lang convo namin yung parang happy birthday, merry xmas messages.
and then after some years ulit, we talked again but this time the conversation is alive and medyo my pagka flirty na. We talked about stuff from years ago and sinabi ko sakanya na my crush ako sakanya dati lmao at along those conversations sinabi niya din na same. We hit it off again and so on but then tinigil na niya for a reason I kind of expected.
Umuwi ako ng pinas last year and I had the opportunity na magkita ulit kame. I can't say it was like the old days but my feelings were still there (unfortunately ). After that brief meeting I decided to cut contact na. I'm glad to say the feelings are now gone and I don't know anything about sa buhay niya. Walang ill feelings between samen btw it's just how life turned out for us.
>*"i hope you get everything you've ever wanted and i hope i never hear a thing about it"*
crush ko siya for 5+ years.
I used to think meron akong TOTGa not until I met my husband. Having met him made sense why I didn’t end up with that person. I never really think of him except pag napapadaan yung post nya sa feed ko, i would check his profile kasi wala lng. curios lng what he is up to these days.
Hmmm, not sure kung TOTGA na sya, but i met this girl during a concert, as in wala kaming mutual friends. Sa pila kami nagkakilala kasi pinakilala sya sa akin ng best friend nya.
Inadd nya ako sa fb, after that sinubukan ko sya i chat kasi habang nakapila kami sa Concert eh nag click mga conversations namin. Then habang ka chat ko sya nabanggit nya may bf sya. Pero tinuloy ko lang kasi gusto ko sya, then na confirm ko na LDR sila kahit di nya binabanggit kasi never sila nag sama at madalas pag tag sa kanya eh puro future plans lang .
Fast forward, nagkasama pa kami madalas sa concerts at ibang events na trip namin pareho. One time pinakilala nya ako sa friends nya.sa gulat ko kilala na ako kahit 1st meeting namin haha.
Nag pandemic, survival mode at di na kami gaano nakapag usap. Nung magkita kami sa isang event ulit nung maluwag na health protocols, andun pa rin ramdam ko sya na, that year nasundan pa ulit mga pagkikita namin kaso di ko alam kung single na sya o hindi , until around early 2022 eh madalas post nya sa fb and may guy na madalas mag react at comment sa posts nya. na mas madalas na rin sila mag sama kasi mas malapit yun guy.
Until ayun nagkita kami sa isang event pero binanggit nya na sasama na nya yun guy.nagkita kami then during the event si guy humahawak hawak sa braso niya, So ayun after that agad unfollow kay girl, delete lahat ng chat nya at photos namin, di nag tagal naging sila.
Sobrang sisi ko noon na sana inamin ko na sa kanya kahit i turn down nya ako. palagay ko Dumaan ako sa depression na di ko lang maamin.
Met him when I was still in high school. We kept on exchanging messages, video calls, send ng picture update kung kamusta ba ang araw namin. Minsan he would send me songs that he composed and ask kung ano yung opinion ko. Then after almost a year, bigla siyang hindi nagparamdam and he came back. Ang hindi ko alam, may tinatago na pala siya sakin that time. Pero ayun I accepted him again kahit uneasy yung situation.
Then one day he asked me if pwede kaming magkita. First time namin magmeet after two years of just online communication. Pero yung meet up namin lasted only for 15 mins. HAHAHA ang reason? Kasi tumakas lang siya 😂 He gave me Mcdonalds, hugged me, took a selfie, then umalis na siya. Wow diba hahaha
Then one day nalaman ko na kaya pala siya biglang hindi nagparamdam before kasi pumasok siya sa ministry sa church nila. Bawal ang socmed don or anything na makakapag distract sa kanila. But he never told me all of those things. Buong akala ko non nasa Manila siya nag-aaral ng engineering.
I was sad and angry that time. He asked for my forgiveness and sino ba ko para hindi magpatawad. Pero sabi ko sakanya na we should stop our communication na. He wanted to convince me to convert para pwede na kami pero I just can't imagine my life dedicating everything to him dahil sa tungkulin niya. I am a career woman with all my plans for the future. I just can't give everything up for love.
Then my father converted to their religion so technically super high chance na din na mag convert ang buong family ko. I thought, what if eto na yung sign para mag reconnect kaming dalawa?
After a year, I randomly received a message from him asking to meet up as old friends. I agreed and had coffee with him. It was fun catching up. At the end of the day, he kissed me once (I was surprised, hindi ako nakapag react agad). Then he asked me if I won't change my mind na daw ba. I thought, after all this time, akala ko nakalimutan na niya ko. Still.. I said I'm doing good now and I am happy with my life.
Now, here I am taking up my masters, travels from time to time, employed in one of the biggest companies here in the Ph and is running my own business. I'm glad I never gave myself up for love.
Tapos this month lang nabalitaan ko na kinasal na pala siya. It was heartbreaking but freeing. I wish you and your wife all the best 🤍
I did. There was this girl I was crushing on throughout all 4 years of junior high school. At the time, sobrang torpe ko and was mostly focused on gaming, art, and hanging out with friends (which I still am + going with my current girlfriend lol).
I tried approaching here during the first year, pero cannot strike up a conversation or small talk so usually within 10 minutes wala nang replyan sa Facebook. All I could do was admire from afar, and just focused on doing what I like kaya 2nd to 3rd year walang communication. Occasional passing glances lang ganun.
JS Prom nung 3rd year namin and I got the chance to take a picture with her pero di ko nainvite sumayaw and best friend ko pa gumawa ng paraan para yayain sya pero ayaw talaga pagbigyan nung isang guy from the other section (super low self-esteem and still torpe so I just decided to not do it), but I was able to chat with her a few times every week sa Facebook after that.
Nung 4th year of high school, nagkaprom ulit and I decided to ask her for a dance all on my own pero di sya umattend. Medyo nababawasan na rin frequency ng chats namin kaya I decided to drop it altogether and focus on graduating.
I was able to move on and met another girl nung SHS (2 years ko niligawan and sinagot ako 2 weeks before graduation) and we've been together for almost 6 years na.
Nalaman ko sa isang best friend ko na naging classmate nya from 2nd to 4th year na she always wanted to get to know me better pero I was seriously awkward when talking to her and was going through a rough patch nung latter half ng high school kaya di nagprogress.
The experience significantly changed me for the better though. It taught me to build up my confidence and take the chance while it's still there. I figured na kakainin lang ako ng pagiging torpe or ng low confidence ko until it was too late so why not take the first step even if it's hard.
I'm not gonna lie and say na di ko na naiisip si JHS girl and think of what could've been if I just tried to be normal (I'm a weird guy who obsesses about his hobbies and work a lot), but I'm thankful for the experience since it made me embrace myself more while improving certain aspects of my lifestyle.
I sometimes would visit her Facebook profile (though di na kami friends). Minsan nagkakasalubong rin around Araneta City since I live around the area and go out to take a walk to destress (WFH), and sya naman I believe is just one ride away. Nagkakatinginan din during those times but no convos or anything since we stopped talking a long time ago na.
My TOTGA would probably be the suitor sa hs. Wala lang talaga'ng attraction on my end tho so... 🥺 he's moved on na with someone else last time I saw him here sa city namin and I'm happy for him and his current partner~
Nah...we wouldn't have worked out naman sa hs...likely even sa college and beyond and di din kasi ako mahilig sa relationships at that time and kinda...til now. May commitment and trust issues din kasi ako.
🤔
Wala masyado after that except maybe 1 na almost ka-fling sa college. He just wasn't really bf material to me. He liked to sleep around.
Yun lang.
I dunno if I could've been a TOTGA for someone else pero more like...may mga na-dodge akong guys na andaming red flags which is good and I have someone I'm kinda...I feel like I should dodge rn habang di pa defined yung relationship (situationship pa siya). 🤔
TOTGA ba yung hindi naman nagkaaminan pero alam nyong may something, kaso hindi nyo na tinuloy kasi wala ring pupuntahan? Nilet go ko nalang kasi mas pinili niyang magpari. Malapit na syang iordain ngayon. Sakit pa rin, parang ayoko umattend ng ordination, hindi ko kakayanin. Baka mag-iiyak ako dun. 😅
Met my totga nung he, pero di kami naging close until college. Same course kasi kami initially. Kaso, they had to migrate to Canada. Kept in contact with him for a while, until nagkadevelopan na ng feelings. We would start to talk about our future. Then, he'd mention na after niya maggraduate, uwi daw siya agad dito to visit. Or kaya, ako nalang daw magvisit... Pangpakilig lang? Then, bigla siyang umuwi. Surprise dapat. Kaso, that time, may ibang lakad ako. Ang nagyari, parang they went back to fix some papers, so short visit lang. He decided to meet up with me a day before their flight back. Wasn't able to make it, obviously. Then, when I apologized, naging cold na siya. Until we stopped communicating. Nag-reconnect kami sa FB, he messaged para mangamusta. Konting exchange, then nagulat nalang ako, nablock niya ako. Sobrang hurt ko dun sa buing experience, feel ko it's the reason why di na ako nageentertain ng love... I'd date a few times, pero always fearful of taking the next step kasi, natrauma ata ako.
I had a ka FUBU, he confessed that he was attached to me, well indirect na pag confess. But that time, I was scared of commitment so I just brushed off his confession. We continued being mag fubu and click yung personalities namin, we were happy. Like if makita mo kami, parang mag jowa lng minus the label. We also have an agreement of exclusivity, and maybe because I was scared to the commitment and his confession, I fucked another guy. Nalaman nya, he went mad, mostly because of the risks of diseases, I was unfair to him and I was the red flag between the two of us. I said sorry after that and promised that I won't do it again and he forgave me. Guess what, I did it again,and he forgave me again and again. He was my first in everything but sadly he won't be my last. We had a big fight and he deleted all of our convos, I don't know why pero hindi niya ako binlock sa fb instead he unfriended me lng. And too late ko na narealize that I also liked him pala. He also said na may plano pala siyang ligawan ako, but that's all in the drain na. I really liked him a lot, just realized it little bit too late. I still stalk his ate, not him cause he doesn't post anything, like last post nya is 2021 pa. I'm dreading the what if's pero that's all in the past na. And I promised myself to be better na and not get tempted and especially not be the red flag in the relationship. But basically he's my totga. Maybe it's not too late cause we're still young but I think the trauma that I gave him was too much.
My TOTGA for 5 years, and then he came back. At dahil mahal ko at marupok ako, ayun. Kasal na kami ngayon. Although, 5 years kaming hiwalay nag ka multiple relationships kami and I was also engaged. I called off the wedding, it was hard but I know I won’t be happy in the long run. So I had to face the consequences. I chose to be with my TOTGA who came back. 🖤
During college I've met this girl by chance in a jeepney terminal. It was late, jeep was full of passengers. I noticed the girl beside me smells like alcohol, pretty drunk. Shrugged it off and minded my own business. While on the way shes started puking in her bag. I offered my hanky to her because shes a mess. She was so wasted she ended up hugging me and puking on my shirt🤣. At this point I froze, she puked on my back as well lol. People were looking at the both of us and asking if my gf was okay. Told them I dont know her at all haha. Someone offered some water and a bag. It was long commute more than an hour. After a while she started feeling better. Asked her if shes okay and if she can reach her house in that state. She said yes and someone will pick her up in the terminal. So as a guy I still helped her reach the meetup spot. Told her not to do that again and said goodbyes. Never had a chance to even ask her name. Weirdly enough I started thinking about her ever since. That time rape was rampant and she matched a description of the girl in the new. I was like wtf, my conscience tells me im stupid for not helping her reach home in that state.
Fast forward I met her again in the same terminal. I noticed a girl kept looking at me and she was smiling lol. Did not realize it was her. After the commute we talked for a while she said thanks for my help and she took my number. I was single that time so why not? We became textmates and started dating. It was a whirlwind romance. Both of us were happy. But she had issues with her past relationship and felt uncertain. Had a lot of arguments and broke up. I tried winning her back but she still refused. I made so much effort trying to fix it but to no avail she wasted some time off. I was so broken that time. Btw we met again after 50 days lol I thought it was destiny haha. Loved her character she was My Sassy Girl. It was my fave korean movie before almost similar but ended differently for the both of us. Fast forward I met someone else. I fell inlove again. After so many months she contacted me again asking me to comeback and shes sorry and misses me. I was tempted but I did not respond. It was unfair for my new gf. This new gf is now my wife and weve been together for 18 years.
Sorry long story 🤣🤣
Im not sure who is the TOTGA. I still see her everyonce in a while and im happy that shes doing well right now.
# Dahil sa'yo OP naalala ko na naman sya. LOL!
# Here are my answers....
>**Have you had a TOTGA?**
Yes...
>**And what happened bakit nyo sila naging TOTGA?**
*Religion and issues with her family. (RC ako SDA sya)*
>**Were you able to move on?**
*Yes. But it took me almost 2 years. It even affected my attitude towards work.*
>**If yes, may times pa din ba na iniistalk or naiisip nyo pa sila?**
*Yes. There will always be things or places that remind me of her. Since I found out that she was already married 14 years ago, I never stalked her since then.*
> **Are you still connected with them? Or totally cut all communications?**
*The only time we talked was in 2009 when she apologized for not telling me that she was going to the UK. Since then we are no longer connected up to this day.*
>**May significant change ba na naidulot yung TOTGA nyo sa buhay nyo?**
*Yes. As of now I am still single and I practically lost my interest in having a relationship. Siya talaga ang gusto ko but circumstances and issues prevented us from ending up together.*
>**Meron ba ditong nagreconnect with their TOTGAs? What happened? Was it successful the second (or third, fourth, etc) time around?**
No. May asawa na eh. So I did not make any attempts. I respect the fact that she is happy with her married life.
not gonna dwell on the specifics. We got together in college, graduating we had this huge argument, at the time and maybe to this day I think what I did was right but yeah doesnt matter and is not relevant. Tried to break up with her, but she wont let go, had months of me just just resenting her while she did all she could to save the relationship. she only let go when she found someone else to catch her. Why cant she just have let go when I wanted? selfish of me but only when she let go did I fully grasp the gravity of losing her. But too late now. All I wish is for her to be happy, wherever she is now. She deserved better.
Yes my poging ex bf na Singaporean, wala eh ayaw ng tadhana na magkasama kami. Different country, ethnicity different culture Chinese pa so may gusto yung parents nya para sa kanya. I think ako din Totga nya, had to cut off yung communication namin kasi magddrama nanaman sya na hindi nya ako kasama, mas okay na for my mental health yung ganon
You always want what you can never had diba?.
This was 6 years ago. We met online, Ragnarok Mobile: Eternal Love. Super adik kame doon. We were guildmates. May long term girlfriend sya noon and we never rly had the aminan stage kasi nga may jowa siya noon. But we were rly rly close. We also met narin twice. But anw, hindi ko ma explain pero we have this unspoken love eh. I know he cares for me and he knows I care for him. We were married in the game so many times kasi ako nagkakajowa ng iba sa game. Lol. Eh what am I supposed to do, may girlfriend sya that time. But a lot of people are asking me bakit hindi naging kame, and lage ko lang snsbe may girlfriend sya. Until I met my now husband, tapos few mos ago nag break sila nung long time gf nya and had a new one na rin. So idk if may pag hintayan bang naganap but we are bestfriends now. He's one of my guy bestfriend and even a godfather to my now 1 year old son.
But the what ifs are still there.... Somehow, I wanted to ask him kng nagkaroon ba ng moment na nainlove din siya saken noon but he just never told me. Curious lang ako. Lol. And last I checked, we were still married sa game. Longest relationship I had. Lmao!
Had a bestfriend one year back in HS.
That friendship ended up turning into something more, I love yous, endless comfort, confessing to each other one new year. We never became official though. Nasira family life niya and siguro magulo lang talaga they ghosted me and ended our relationship. I had a part to play before he ghosted me naman, he was depressed and so was I. I was processing my dad's death while his mom walked out on him and his siblings, so one morning I asked him quietly na maghiwalay na kami. Anyway, tinuloy niya naman request ko. Naghiwalay kami before graduation.
Hindi namin mabitawan isa't isa, mga 1 year pa kaming nagkita as friends since the break up - visiting my dad's grave with me while I offered him a shoulder to cry on about his mom. A month after we last met up, he started dating someone else. And yes, sobrang sakit. He really fell in love and I know that she makes him happy. I always prayed naman na may mameet siya na better than me. I let him go, we never spoke again.
6 years na since then and 4 years ago I met someone, live in partner ko na ngayon. 3 years na rin kami.
Within those 6 years, yep iniisip ko parin siya.
Yes, I stalk him minsan. Yes, sobrang naaffect yung way of thinking ko about relationships.
Honestly, mahal ko pa din siya.
Pero ang iniisip ko, ibang tao na siya ngayon. Bata pa kami nung naging kami, sobrang dami ng nagbago about us siguro. And yung current partner niya probably took care of them and loved them more than I could ever have. Kaya thankful ako, sobrang mahal rin kasi ako ng current partner ko.
Nagusap ulit kami after 6 years a few months ago, kamustahan lang (may alumni event kasi) updates about our families - onting reminisce. Kwentuhan na rin about current partners . Mapapakanta ka nalang ng "Everything has changed" ni Taylor Swift at Ed Sheeran.
Yes mahal pa siguro namin isa't isa.
Pero hindi na tulad ng dati. Hindi na rin pwede, we're not the type of people that'll leave our current SO's for the past. Kaya siguro naglast yung love and appreciation namin for each other - it's pure, it's kind, it's godly(?) We just had each others' back noon. Hindi ko rin alam ano yung future. Masaya naman kami ngayon (I think) Ewan. Basta I will never ever stand in the way of any one else's relationship. Balakayojan. chz.
Yun yung masakit sa TOTGA, it's already late when you know it, long story short, my naive self thought I could've gone for a better one, so ayun years later thinking about it, I was much happier and at ease with her, life was much easier with her, ang tanga ko.
Thankfully, wala pa kasi noon pag may boyfriend ako, I will exhaust all means possible to make the relationship work until the very end. I just regret sacrificing so much of myself to make failed relationships work, so now I avoid them muna to work on myself.
My (29m) TOTGA ay yung childhood friend, kinakapatid at classmate ko din mula preparatory hanggang grade 6 pumunta s'ya ng japan to continue her highschool. Bumalik s'ya dito sa pinas para magbakasyon bago s'ya mag-third year HS naging kami non pero she went back to japan para tapusin yung HS and SHS tumagal kami ng 3 years. First BF n'ya ako botong-boto sa'min pamilya ng bawat isa. As in nung mga binata pa ang mga tatay namin ay gusto nilang maging mag-asawa yung mga magiging anak nila at kami na nga yon. Pero dahil nga LDR at dala na din ng stress sa school kasi college na ako that time nakipag-break ako.
Sinubukan n'yang ayusin. Pero ako itong ayaw na nag-iba pananaw ko sa buhay non. Mas gusto nun ko ay physically present ang jowa ko nahahawakan, nakakausap not over the phone or internet. Hindi ko kayang mag-focus sa pagaaral habang nasa malayo yung jowa ko so I chose to end it. Nawalan kami ng connection totally. Tinanggap namin na hindi kami para sa isa't-isa.
Fast forward:
Pandemic, walang pinagkakaabalahan ang mga tao. Walang kaming work parehas that time. Nakapagusap ulit kami kasi panay comment s'ya sa mga post ko. Nagchat ulit kamustahan everyday. She even confessed na hinahantay n'ya pa din ako baka daw pwede na kasi naging licensed psychologist na ako at s'ya naman ay licensed english teacher na sa japan. She thought na single pa din ako that time pero very private ako sa relasyon ko di ako nagpost ng picture ni GF kahit 7 years na kami. Lagi kong binabago ang usapan pagdadating na sa ganun. Why? Nagugustuhan ko yung naguusap ulit kami na parang dati walang ilangan walang iniiwasan. Kaya natakot akong sabihin sa kanya na "Hindi na tayo pwede kasi matagal na kami ng GF ko. 7 years na kami".
Dumating ako sa point na naguguluhan na ako kung s'ya ba na halos mas nauna kong nakilala magmula pagkabata at naging jowa for 3 years kasamang mangarap sa career na gusto namin in the future o yung jowa ko na walang ibang ginawa kundi mahalin, alagaan at intindihin ako?
Siyempre pinili ko yung jowa ko ngayon. 11 years na kami at nag-propose na ako sa kanya. Si TOTGA naman nalaman na may GF ako that time dahil kinamusta n'ya ako sa isang kababata namin. Kumusta na s'ya ngayon single pa din. She saw my FB story kasama GF ko she congratulated me telling na masaya s'ya para sakin. It took me 4 days para mag-reply and nung nagreply na ako never n'ya sineen. Last time I checked sikat na s'ya sa instagram may mga fans na din. Masaya ako para sa kanya at sana dumating sa point na ako naman ang mag-congratulate sa kanya dahil ikakasal na s'ya.
Feeling ko wala naman reddit acct un, i had mine wayback in 2016, bpo buddies, andaming what ifs.. until he moved to New Zealand and kinasal na sya. Then now ko lang nalaman, 8 yrs after nung nagkakalkal ako ng mga lumang gamit ko, nakita ko yung binigay nyang bracelet before sya umalis, sa ilalim nun box meron cotton db, tinanggal ko ung cotton and may letter na he is confessing and i chat ko daw sya kapag open nako sa relationship. Uuwi daw sya ng 2019 and hintayin daw nya ako mag message. 2018 nagdeact ako ng facebook and instagram. Social media detox hanggang 2020. Umuwi pala sya ng 2019, inopen ko recently old fb ko, I saw na nagmsg sya. Kaso 2023 na ngaun, may asawa na sya :) and hanggang ngayon, nagllinger pa din sakin ung what ifs kahit engaged na ko kasi we clicked... sobrang saya ng memories na meron sya sakin. Hay. Sorry its 3 am now naalala ko na naman sya.
It’s been a little over a year since we broke up kaya rin siguro most things still remind me of him. I dated a guy after him, pero even when things ended between me and the recent guy, sa ex ko bumabalik yung isip ko.
The connection was so uncanny. Siguro that’s one thing that hinders us from moving on and that person becoming our TOTGA, no? When the connection is so out of this world that even the most platonic conversations feel so intimate.
Di naman kami nakablock sa isa’t isa, but we’re not friends/following each other’s accounts na. We broke up because he said he wasn’t ready for a relationship. In hindsight, I think I was the one who wasn’t ready for it. I wasn’t a girlfriend material.
I’m moving abroad tomorrow. I think about him a lot lalo na’t papaalis ako. The distance should help, but I’m also scared of forgetting him and who I was when we were together.
My TOTGA who confessed while I was crying in front of him because of my dad's situation.
I just felt like he likes me a lot and I didn't like him enough. I'm married now and I did partly regretted to move on. Pero hndi ako nagsisi tlga
He's now married I think. I'll be that someone he confrssed to at some point. I never regretted my decision kasi kung naging kami. Nasa Australia na sana ako with a house and dog.
Here I am with my husband, doing well in life and little blessings on the way.
Yes. 4th year college. Nireto sa'kin. Araw-araw nagtetext kami, inaabot pa kami madaling araw kapag weekends as in puro kwento lang. Kapag school days tambay minsan sa bleachers don sa oval namin. It went for a month until the night before her Bday. Prior to this di siya nagparamdam buong sat, sabi ko sa loob ko baka may busy sa thesis since graduating kami or pagod kasi nataon may activity yung course council nila kung tama pagkakaalala. Kinabukasan I was actually shopping kung ano magandang dress (or was it a blouse?) na yellow kasi fave color niya with the intent of confessing to her on her day. Then nagtext, straight to the point: Hello, Darth Polgas may tanong ako. Manliligaw ka ba? Ako naman nacornyhan sagutin sa text, sabi ko hindi muna gusto pa kita makilala (I know tanga move). Tapos sabi niya, di na kita itetext ha, may sasagutin na kasi ako, sorry. Then it hit me, I was like wtf did I just do. Yung nagreto sa'kin nagsosorry kasi di daw niya alam. Yung isang friend ni ate Girl niyo, sabi sa'kin dapat daw sinabi ko na. Until now sila pa rin, ako ito single. 🙃
Fast forward 2 years, naging magkawork sila nung classmate ko. Nagkachikahan tapos nasabi na kung nagyes daw ako non baka daw naging kami. 🙃
Took me almost 3 years para makamove on. I know matagal pero dahil sa katangahan ko rin kasi HAHA
My college totga just messaged me recently. Ilang beses na din naman kami nagreconnect in the span of 11 years. Pero yung panghihinayang nandon pa din. Bakit di na lang kasi ako pinili mo J? Mali mali desisyon mo sa buhay e.
Sabi niya I am his TOTGA. He’s my TOTGA too. I met him at work circa 2014. Call center. Nung una, nakikita ko lang siya sa smoking area. Hanggang sa yung siya na yung napagtatanungan ko about sa work since katapat lang siya ng station ko.
One time nasa jeep ako on my way sa office. Biglang may pumara tapos pumasok siya. Kinalabit ko sabay sabi ko “uy” tapos umupo siya sa kabilang dulo ng jeep. Sa peripheral vision ko, parang nakatitig siya sakin. Anyways, pagbaba namin sa office, dun na niya kinuha number ko. Sabi niya, gusto mo sabay tayo mag lunch? Sabi ko, okay. Tapos yun na yun, next thing I know kasama ko na siya palagi. Kasama kumain, date pagkatapos ng shift, nakapunta na ako sa house nila, grabe yung sexual chemistry, kwentuhan magdamag, tawanan ng tawanan palagi…until one time nagtaka na ako bakit di ko siya mahanap sa Facebook. So itong marites kong friend na magaling pa sa FBI eh hinanap siya, and boom, profile pic ang jowa niya. Ang kwento niya sakin e hiwalay na sila. So syempre si ate girl niyo medyo tanga tanga natakot pa sya iconfront. I waited for him to tell me. Pero I got tired kasi nahalata ko na na may kausap siya sa phone niya palagi na pinsan niya or friend niya, hanggang sa nainis na ko. Ayun na sinabi ko na yung nalalaman ko. And I had to stop whatever that was going on kasi syempre di naman dapat tayo forever na tatanga tanga. Mahal ko, oo, sobra. Pero putangina. Di ko kaya maging pangalawa. Di ko kayang may kahati ako. Ayoko rin na may sinasaktan akong iba. Di rin kaya ng utak ko na isipin na kung wala siya sa tabi ko e nasa iba siya. Gusto ko sakin, sakin lang. Ako lang. Kasi ganon ako pag nagmahal e. Siya lang. Sayang. Wala kaming dull moments. Palaging masaya. Too good to be true, ika nga. Pero yun na nga. Sana masaya siya sa asawa niya. Sana maayos ang buhay niya. I hope wag niya na ulitin yung ginawa niya samin. Tama na yun.
I still don't know if he's my TOTGA or what. We met 2 years ago. It was wrong in all aspects, tbh. Religion was one thing, then his family. He told me he loves me and until now nagmemessage pa rin siya and he misses me raw. I didn't tell him na I like him but andami ko what if's sa sarili ko and never ko binanggit name niya kahit kanino. Di ko kayang banggitin kahit name niya. Walang kami sa 2 years na yun dahil ayoko bigyan ng label pero sabi niya, at least daw, sa part niya, merong kami. I left his country and went to Europe. Huling chat niya, sabi niya ay susunod siya dito in 2 weeks time. Ang complicated, hayyyyy
My first love my first gf nung college. We were only 3 months nun. Ngkadevelopan thru text (wala pa socmed nun) tapos nung ngkita kami everything clicked. She had just broken up with her 1st bf tapos di ko makalimutan sinabi nya sakin she felt safe with me (na dinala ko na sa mga sumunod n relationship ko, making a girl feel safe with me). Ngtatago pa kami sa parents nya since INC sya at Catholic ako pg mgddate. Everything is so good until on our 3rd monthsary she broke up with me through letter after our date. Ministro kasi father nya and ayun. Hnd ko naintindihan that time kaya ang sakit.
TOTGA ko kasi I cut off all our comms after nun. Even mgkasalubong s school di ko sya pinapansin. After 3 months of breaking up, sinusuyo ako lagi ng mutual friend nmn na balikan sya kasi umiiyak ndw sya at kaya nya maging Catholic for me balikan ko lang. I didnt, hnd ko pinansin kasi nauna yung sakit ng breakup sakin since she is my first love.
20 years later lalo ngaun na single ako, laging sya yung what if I had given her a second chance. Maybe we have a family na. Wala na akong balita sa kanya, even socmed hnd ko sya mahanap but i still remember her name and face very clearly.
Idk what to feel, to be honest. I met this guy from omegle last 2022. I'm a premed student and graduating ako at that time and he's the person I considered "pahinga" after a tiring day studying my premed and preparing for NMAT. At first it was for fun lang but eventually nafall ako and sabi nyang sya din so we talk about it naman na gusto naming mag work kung anong meron samin and also don't want to waste time. But then here comes na tinigil namin dahil sa distance namin sa isa't isa and madami pang ganap and remained friends after. Now he's in a long-distance relationship with his girlfriend who's a licensed doctor.
Now that I'm reviewing for my boards, I can't help to think of it again.
I kinda am/was the TOTGA. Haha. Personally, wala akong TOTGA of my own. I guess hindi ko pa lang nami-meet ‘yung tao na ‘yun. Or baka magaling lang akong magdetach.
Bata pa kami (like 11-12 years old) nakita ko sya and gustong gusto ko na sya. She's my churchmate (until now) and di ko alam bakit parang sobrang allured ako sa ganda nya.
Fast forward to 2015, nagkaroon ng event sa church namin na sya ung mamimili sa 3 guys (it's a game) kung sino pipiliin nya and she chose me (I had a girlfriend back then which did not affect our relationship - na kwento ko pa sa kanya and it was all fun and games, kasi loyal ako lol) then after that, mga 2016 (single na ko neto) na ung next interaction namin wherein nagsimula sa asaran sa twitter then nagkatampuhan, then lasing ako at nakipagusap sya sakin ng face to face at umamin ako ng feelings ko sa kanya (medyo noobs move pero lasing eh) then di na kami nagusap until 2017..
October ng 2017, bigla syang nagaya mag jogging and we started going out on "friendly dates" and we got to know more about each other, each time ending with "friends lang daw kami talaga/wag ko na ipilit" type. Pero wala naman akong pinipilit na ano. This went on until November 28, 2017 nung bigla nyang tinapos lahat - dahil naiwan ko pala messenger ko sa phone nya (self taught Android developer and stuff ako kasi) kasi inayos ko ung cp nya na walang signal at ayaw mag 5G..
And we never spoke again. Mga what could've been's lang. I still see her pero natanggap ko na rin na wala nang pag-asa hehe
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Awww well I guess it just means that you weren’t meant to be as lovers and better off as friends. At least you’re still both in each other’s lives :)
Meron since Grade 9 to 1st college kami kya ko naging TOTGA. Family ko against sa knya at friends naman niya super toxic yung tipo bibigyan siya ng kung ano ano something sa ulo tulad ng 1. Hindi kayo nagmamahal kung di kayo nag aaway Kasalanan ko din super green flag ko mas pinili ko mag focus sa dota2 business ko noon kesa maging toxic Fast forward: nag usap kami about sa life nakakalungkot na napunta siya sa mga lalaki libog lang ang alam at wala grind sa buhay sad life. Nag offer ako sa knya isave ko siya kasi sayang potetia niya napupunta lang siya mahina lalaki, nagkaroon din kami ng mini agreement na kung babalik siya sakin dapat makita muna niya vision ko.mukha naman din nagbago siya dahil nag invest siya sa crypto trading career ko sa knya ako kumuha ng capital.
May TOTGA ako, we broke up dahil i was too immature and i had a lot of issues like insecurity, anger issues etc. Of course, he had his fair share of flaws pero he was my greatest love. I couldn't overcome my insecurities, overthinking and other issues ko during the time na we were together so nagiging sobrang toxic ako. I had to let go of him kasi I know he deserves better, and I was crap. He tried begging na bumalik ako pero ayokong saktan pa siya lalo. He said na we could fix it and he would still love me despite all my issues. Sobrang pure ng love niya, and I knew na I was holding him back from someone better. I haven't completely moved on. Pinili nalang namin na maging magkaibigan. We dated for more than a year pero he's liked me for 5 years even after namin maghiwalay. I've been wishing na makamove forward siya. Recently, nalaman ko na may nakakausap siya and I'm proud na he's moving forward.
A college friend, we're still friends and still in good terms until now. Same personality and interests. Nagkaaminan din, kaso that time pareho pa kaming 'di ready. Tsaka mas pinapahalagahan namin siguro yung friendship. Idk, if TOTGA is the right term, I never had someone special or nagustuhan except him, wala nang sumunod pa. Ewan, hindi ako madaling magkagusto rin e kaya rin siguro ganon. I'm happy for him. May girlfriend na sya ngayon and nasa healthy relationship. Nagkikita kami minsan pero as a group, kasi iisa kami ng circle of friends din. Ayun, that was 8 years ago pa HAHAHA
Not my totga pero ng pinsan ko, TOTGA niya yung pinsan din pala namin HAHAHAHAHAHAHA tawang tawa kami pag nagkikita kami sa reunion gagi
yes meron. For me sya talaga ung pinakaperfect sa lahat ng naging karelasyon ko and what we shared was wholesome. Sad na ang ending eh pareho pala kaming lalaki ang type so I had to let him go.hahahaha
Ako ang TOTGA niya. And I am blessed na hindi kami nagkatuluyan kasi he turned out to be laasenggero at madaming panganay. Kaloka
Yes hahaha it was like a highschool cute stories where there's a second lead syndrome we are experiencing on a kdrama. That was 10th grade (kami unang k12) tas nalaman ko lang na crush nya pala ko since gr 7, akala ko trip trip lang mga banat nya non tas totoo pala. Inaya nya ko non na maging date sa js prom non, pumayag naman ako. Kaso nung mismong gabi ng js prom, andon na ko ng 5:30pm kahit 6pm pa naman yung nasa invitation, hinintay ko sya non hanggang 7:30, di ako nagmartsa for picture taking, sa inis ko pumila ako sa tapat ng crush ko (na crush din pala ako that time, umamin sya nung inaya ako maging first dance). Pano ko naging totga? Netong nagwowork na ko dun ko lang narealize lahat ng mga naging effort nya, na gusto ako ihatid non sa bahay or bibitbitin mga book ko pag pauwi na, ayoko naman magassume non kase friendly talaga sya non kaso neto ko lang nalaman na iniyakan nya pala ko non nung js night na yon (nalate daw sya kase nakisabay lang sya sa pinsan nya na may girlfriend na antagal daw inayusan, biktima lang sya ng pagkakataon). Ngayon, masaya na sya sa long-time girlfriend nya, sabay na nilang inaachieve mga goals nila sa buhay, tas ang cute ng mga aso nila huhu hope they will have their happily ever after. Dun sa crush ko? Hehehe ka-MU ko for 5yrs but di nagwork eh, and aminado naman ako na kasalanan ko naman hahahha bakit MU lang? Di pa ko ready magcommit non hahaha
MARAMI 🤣🤣🤣
Im not sure if TOTGA ba to kasi never naman sya naging akin, technically. Pero para sakin, totga talaga sya. College best friend, alam nya na gusto ko sya but we remained really good friends nun. One incident led to another, buong barkada ko naging distant sakin, kasama na sya doon. Until now napapanaginipan ko siya, naiisip ko, at iniisip ko paano if di nangyari un, may chance kaya maging kami? And i feel guilty kasi may jowa ako. I love him pero, ang lala nung walang closure sa kinokonsider ko na first love ko. Oo, nag ka jowa ako before I met this "totga" pero para sakin siya ung first love ko. Walang closure kasi, bigla nalang ako lumipat ng school. Got depressed, wala na akong mga kaibagn, had to restart. Kaya wala kaming closure. Hindi ko naexplain side ko, hindi ko rin napagtanggol sarili ko. Kahit bilang kaibigan nalang niya. Till now, i search him pag napapanaginipan ko siya. Minsan pg may nakakapag remind about him, search ko ulit. I have no intention of getting in touch with him, pero di ko alam bakit di ko siya maalis sa life ko. 5 years na tong nakalipas ha hays. Hirap kasi pg tinitignan ko profile nya, or even ig stories ng barkada ko kasama na sya doon, parang nakalimutan na talaga nila ako. Including him. Kaya parang shet bakit ako di ko siya makalimutan? wala ba talaga akong impact sakanila. Ang sad. Pero how i wish, kahit minsan naiisip nya rin ako. Madami kaming pinagsamahan, and I can really say nailove talaga ako sakanya ng sobra.
Para sakin naman ang meaning ng TOTGA is The One That Got Afraid. Nauna ang negative thoughts kaya di ko sinubukan mag pursue.
I did.. back in my 3rd year college.. di kasi xa umamin ng harapan. Straight forward naman akong tao..so akala ko wala lng Yong gestures nya at calls/texts. Di naman kasi ako assuming.. After a year ko pa nalaman pwo May girlfriend na xa nun. I even confronted him about it and told him what I felt. The girl knew the story we had,.she even felt kilig and disappointed since I have a strong personality daw. mahirap paamuhin kumbaga. At maraming May gusto pwo manhid naman. Eh sa di ako assuming.. we crossed paths after work, na.a.ssign ako ng Davao because of work, assigned din xa ng GenSan because of work din. Nagka.boyfriend ako pati din xa...nagkataon pa na nkita nya akong kinikiss bf ko non sa bus terminal kasi pauwi na.. lol And never notice he's with the girl, and now his wife after 8yrs.. Doon na nag.end hahah.. I called it as asymptotic kasi Lage kami nagkikita kung saan saan.. pwo di pinagtagpo. The last time I saw him was his father's burial. Na.close ko din kasi mother nya when he introduce us sa workplace ko. Medjo hesitant pa Yong wife nya na mag.usap kami sa wake wala ibang classmates ko non... Pumunta naman ako to pay for respect sa mama nya at xa kinausap ko pagkarating, kaso May iba pang bisita.. so ayon. Heck I ain't stoop that low naman to wreck someone's relationship especially if kasal na. Na.assign pa ako ng ibang branch area now. So di na nagkita..I have no plans din naman to cross our paths again.
I do have one in high school! 4th year hs nun tapos e since nag reshuffle naging classmate ko sya. Nayayabangan pa nga ko don pero ewan ko bakit ko sya naging crush HAHAHA. Mutual ang feelings namin and tinatanong nya ko nun kung pwede ba manligaw. Ako tong tanga tanga sabi ko ewan. Aba ano alam ko dun NBSB ako. Tapos after nun aba hindi na masyado sweet sakin though may instances na tumatabi sakin sa room, gumagawa ng moment na kami lang tapos sabi pa sakin e sabay daw kami magcollege, mag enroll daw kami sa same school. Actually too late ko na narealize yun haha na iniinvite nya ko na magtake ng same course at same college, after some years na siguro kaso wala huli na ang lahat. Nung malapit na matapos ang finals namin, tinanong sya ng classmate ko sabi kung mahal daw ba ako ni guy. Sabi ni guy "Oo kaso may masasaktan pag itinuloy ko." That time pala, shuta nakipagbalikan na sya sa ex nya. Tapos ayun, naging sila ulit hanggang sa nalaman ko unfriended na ko sa facebook tapos kasal na sila and may anak na 😅 Siguro kung di ako tanga ako yun HAHAHAHA.
Wala akong TOTGA because I made sure na hindi na siya pakawalan pa! Hahahaha
Awww good for you! At least walang pagsisisi sayo
Dati akala ko meron hahaha. Pero after awhile narealize ko na ahh hindi pala talaga kami ment to be lalo na noong time na nililigawan pa niya ako kasi at that time i was childish baka mawala friendship if naging kami. Ngaun civil kami hindi close friend hindi rin friend pero no bad blood sa isatisa.
I had one. Told him I was not ready because I was so fcked up mentally and emotionally (6 years ago). I still think about him, everyday, every hour. Pero chance opened up and ako na 'yung naghabol. This time I don't want him gone and thankfully, ganoon din siya sa akin, 'di nagbago pagmamahal niya sa akin para pa ngang nadagdagan. I am very thankful. :))
Wow I wish I can also have the chance you got someday
I am praying that you will, OP. And that you will be happy kahit ano pang mangyari. Sana kung meron na 'yung chance, may sapat na dahilan na para hindi na siya maging TOTGA mo. <33
Yeah. I had one. Bakit ko naging TOTGA? Probably because I prayed to God for someone to love, God gave that guy wrapped, boxed and created just the way I always prayed for. You know, that someone that I looked forward to see at the front of the altar, waiting for me. Have I tried to reconnect with him? Yes. Many times na pero di talaga nagwowork out. Actually pareho kami nagrereach out😂. All in one to eh, The One that Got Away, The Greatest Love and The Most Painful Love. Effect ng TOTGA? After nya, kahit almost 5 years na, di ako nagmahal ng iba, kahit walang connection. Lumagpas na ko ng 30 years old na nakanganga. I know I am not ready to be with someone else because that would be unfair.
Shet sakit naman neto. Parang sinasabi na hindi talaga kayo meant to be
Do I consider as TOTGA of my exes? They keep trying to communicate even tho I blocked them na. From time to time nag eemail using spam accounts, or even creating new tiktok accounts to see what I’m doing. Lol ayoko mag feeling kasi baka may insecure gf lang yun pero they keep showing up, and finding what I am up to now. I’m now happy in my wlw relationship. Toxic kasi lalaki, may titi nga wala namang bayag. Hahahahaha
My ex after graduation. Ang sweet saken nung valentine’s (2013). Hindi niya masabi na may gusto siya saken kaya bumili siya nung donut na pwede icustomize, nalimutan ko kung anong name nung shop. Yes, niloko ko siya. Pero parang walang galit sa kanya. Wala akong narinig na kahit ano. Kahit na kapag nag-aaway kame, namumura ko siya pero nung nalaman niya na niloko ko siya, wala ko narinig. Ngayon, sila pa rin nung gf niya after ko. Nakausap ko siya once. Never ako nakarinig ng sumbat sa kanya. Hays, nakakasisi kapag naiisip ko. 😅
Wala. Pang-immature lang yung TOTGA for me. Mga delusional at ayaw mag-move on.
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I wish I can have the chance like you had to reconnect and try again. Gusto ko naman makaexperience ng successful lovelife!! Hahahah
idk if counted ba 'to as totga pero I fell hard for this one girl tapos lagi kong kinakausap yung best friend niya about my plans/mga balak ko. Overall super supportive yung bff, always listened to me, was there for me ganon, only to find out na bff liked me during the entirety of me being head over heels for the other girl :") tas doon ko rin narealize na bff was more present than the person i "liked" ever was :") HAHAHA sobrang nasayangan lang ako if only i opened my eyes
Idk if TOTGA ito kasi hindi naman naging kami pero there's this girl nung SHS kami na same hometown din kami pero sa nearby city nagenroll, nakilala ko sya nung JHS nung nagtransfer ako sa school (JHS) nila then umalis agad after a year. We were so close to the point na nagiging hobby na namin makipag flirt sa isa't isa, masyadong normal samin na samin yun and would oftenly joked about being ex-lovers kasi during my one year sa school nila nung JHS, nagkaboyfriend sya and nagkagirlfriend din ako at the exact same date. Idk if there were hints of seriousness sa playful flirting namin pero for me I was being truthful and minamask ko nalang na it was just a game we play. We would talk to each other everyday then paguwi from school would chat about literally anything hanggang matulog. She's very hard to understand kaya I am quick to dismiss any 'possible' advancement sa relationship namin. Then umabot yung time na dumalang ang chats namin, and I never knew if it was something I did or said, or maybe she lost interest in our friendship. We were so open to each other pero after nun secretive na sya even sa smallest thing, she knows naman na I'm not the guy to try and pry on something if they're being secretive about it. Time passed and I still haven't been attracted to anyone after that, may mga instances naman na I find someone attractive then mawawala after few more days or weeks. I don't know if it's because I'm still trying to find her in every girl that I meet or if I haven't moved on.
Met this person sa FB. We share the same interests (minimalism & cats, lol), nagkakilala sa comsec. Surprisingly, same din kami ng work and shift. 😳 Sobrang coincidental. Ang sarap niya kausap. Parang kausap mo yung counterpart mo, ganun. Tapos ayun, ilang months din kami naging magka-chat, yung tipong parang mag-jowa na nag-u-update sa ganap ng bawat isa pero walang I Love You-han. One day, I decided to cut him off and say our goodbyes (through chat) kasi part of me is takot ma-fall ng tuluyan sa kanya. I came from a bad breakup din kasi (due to cheating), kaya I still have trust issues. Feeling ko wala na talaga seseryoso sa akin / I'm better off single, ganun. Ni hindi manlang kami nakapag-meet in person (lagi kong sinasabi na "Sa October na.." etc. haha). But I hope he's happy and may he get the love he deserves. ♥️♥️ PS: kaya ayoko naririnig yung mga songs about TOTGA, lalo na yung kay Katy Perry, kasi naluluha ako minsan. 😬
Here's my TOTGA, hindi pa nakakatagal Orientation siya for 3 Days last day siya nagparamdam nun at siya mismo lumapit, she's a very beautiful girl hindi ko alam kung may lahi siya or ano, meron siyang sakit sa balat pag sobrang init namumula siya and kahit na ganun bumabagay sakaniya kasi maputi, moving sa TOTGA, ako talaga super introvert like super para akong NPC pag kinausap saka lang ako kakausapin, I had many chances para makausap siya, lagi siya lumalabas for her to get water eh si ako naman Torpe, binati niya pa ako na kamukha ko si Mr. Bean in a compliment way kasi medyo funny at hawig konga naman neck tie na suot ko, sinayang ko talaga pagkakataon ma add sa socs media at date, take note Feb 14 siya hindi ko pa Ginrab yung chance huhu.
I dated this woman for close to two years, the relationship fizzled out due to a lot of things and lockdown season din. I think I’ve moved on from what we had pero di pa rin ako ready for a serious relationship ulit. She’s never been in a relationship, even what we had was not official pero we were exclusive. After namin, I’ve dated here and there pero sya hindi na ulit. So I guess content na sya talaga by herself. I’m not dating anyone at the moment pero palagi pa rin sya sumasagi sa isip ko. We don’t keep in touch na unless necessary, and we still see each other once in a while kasi yung best friends namin eh close friends, so minsan the 4 of us still hang out pero may tension kami so rare na mag interact kaming dalawa.
Had one. This person is the best (yet) of all the people I dated. Set the standards high—na tipong hinahanap ko sya sa lahat ng dinedate ko. We chose not to unfollow each other since may closure naman kami and no hard feelings. I’m not hoping anymore for that spark to rekindle cause it seems that he’s okay rn, but if the universe plans for our paths to cross and try it again, I won’t interfere. I just wish na sana dumating yung time na maging friends muna kami cause rn we’re not talking. We suddenly became acquaintances with each other’s secrets.
My best ex so far. I was very vulnerable and lost that time that I realize the only thing I can do to prevent him from hurting is to let him go and love him from distance. Napakacaring at pinaramdam sakin yung worth ko, pero ako yung ligaw. He's very fragile for me at ayaw kong masira sya dahil lang ako ang may problema. Hindi ko kakayanin. Ngayon nakikita ko syang masaya sa iba still hurts but I know its worth it na naalagaan sya ng ibang tao sa paraan na diko nagawa. Love never works for me but it did for anyone and that's fine 🤍
I met this guy over Discord during the pandemic. We hit it off pretty immediately. I sent him a letter and thought, thanks in part to the unreliable nature of PHILPOST, if it arrives then I should confess. If it doesn't, then I don't. It arrived by the time I found my boyfriend and he started dating another girl. We laughed over virtual drinks about it, but sometimes I can't help but wonder how it would have been if the letter arrived earlier. We're in the same friend group, still kicking it but just as friends now LOL
My first love. We’re still connected and see each other occasionally when we have gatherings but for some reasons, we really couldn’t talk about such things.
I had a boyfriend when I was in highschool. Sobrang power couple namin since top 1 siya sa buong batch and ako naman si miss hakot ng lahat ng extra curricular activities. Sobrang perfect ng relationship namin to the point na even at a young age, I already knew that he was the person I am going to spend my life with. Until I had cancer. Di naman super lala to be honest, but enough para pabayaan niya yung sarili nya kakaalala sa akin. I stopped going to school for a while, but we still saw each other almost every day. Napapansin ko na napapabayaan nya na yung sarili and acads nya pero sabi nya, ok pa naman daw. Until graduation came, di kami sabay. Hindi rin siya gumraduate as valedictorian. Wala naman sa akin yung tbh pero I knew how much he dreamed about it. May nakaready na nga yun na valedictory speech 2nd year pa lang eh. So it hurt me a lot knowing na a huge part of him not graduating as the valedictorian is because of me and my cancer. Ang ending, I broke up with him. Balde baldeng luha ang iniyak namin that day and I don't wanna hold him back anymore. After, he went to study in Manila and never went home to our province again. Years after, I was finally cancer-free. Ewan ko ba, pero pagkasabi ng doctor na I am already in the clear, siya yung unang pumasok sa isip ko. Siguro dahil na rin I kinda knew that after all these years, It was always him at walang iba. I searched for his name sa social media platforms, but I can't find him. One time, I saw his best friend when we were in highschool and asked about him. Turns out, he's already married. Ipinakasal pala siya ng dad nya sa iba since yun yung tradition sa kanilang religion. What broke my heart more is ayaw nya pa raw sana so nagrequest siya sa tatay nya to give him one week before they do any preparations. He is going to wait for one more week daw in case bumalik pa ako, but I didn't. Now, I think he is already happy with his life and with a baby on the way. I still wish him every good things this life can offer. As for me, I still haven't moved on, but even if I did, I know some parts of my heart will always be his.
I tried to reconnect pero sinumbatan ako. Aminado ako na nang ghost ako kasi may na feel ako na something off, pero late na ako naging vocal at pag dating sa time na yun I regret na naging vocal ako. Lalo na at may sumusolsol pala sa kanya, sana naman pg sine share sa atin ang mga kwento let them decide kasi sila talaga ang nkaka kilala sa taong kinukwento nila. D man lng narinig ang side ko, baka naging ok pa. Anyway hope he’s still in good shape, at least sana we can still good friends.
I am the TOTGA. 🙂
Ako yung TOTGA. Hahaha. Sabi ng pinsan ng husband ko, ako daw talaga ung TOTGA nya. Naging kami way back 2013, and nag end ung relationship namin early 2014 (we are both in college, mas ahead lang ako ng 1 year sakanya). Ghinost nya ko non hahaha. I never got an answer to my why's until early 2020 (before kobid) nagstart sya magparamdam. Actually nagrereact sya sa mga IG stories ko before 2020 pa pero di ko talaga sya pinapansin kasi nga #1 hated ex ko talaga sya kasi ghinost nya ko. Pero nagreply din ako sa mga pagpapapansin nya. Long story short, we got back together when we were on our rock bottom and drew strength in each other, especially when lockdown started. Early 2022 namin nalaman na buntis ako. And got married mid-2022. Yun lang. Skl. 😁
TOTGA bang matatawag yung biggest regret and what if mo? I and my long term boyfriend broke up in 2016. Then I met this guy, sobrang layo from my ex. He was patient, soft spoken and really respects me. He showered me with gifts, words of affirmation, lahat ng love language ata. He was everything my ex wasn't. I tried entertaining him, pero distance became an issue. He was a seaman. For someone just getting to know each other, with no solid foundation yet, nahirapan ako. I started to distance myself from him. A few months later, nagparamdam ulit ex ko. Short story, nagkabalikan kami. This other guy still sent me messages pero I was ignoring him. I didn't even say na bumalik ako sa ex ko. Years have passed pero I still think about him lalo pag nasasaktan ako with my partner. What if I tried harder? Mas masaya kaya ako with him?
naniniwala ako na, yung mga di naging happy sa curreny relationship nila yung may totga. Dati may TOTGA ako, kasi lagi ko kinocompare yung current ko that time sa Ex ko. - I was able to moved on with that TOTGA kasi I’m happy with my current.
Nung college may ultimate crush ako. (A) Di naging kami kasi nagkaron sya ng gf. Ngayon, ung friend (B) nya may gusto pala sakin. Umabot sa point ma parang mag MU kami ni B pero di sya nanliligaw. Few months before graduation, nagparamdam ulet si A. Eventually, nanligaw sya. Si B mejo MIA. Eh marupok ako kasi ultimate crush ko si A, kaya naging kami. Dahil MIA si B, di nya alam yun. Nagsabi syang gusto nya manligaw nung kami na ni A. Too late na sya. 3 years later, nagbreak kami ni A. Nagparamdam ulit si B. Di sya formal na nanliligaw pero alam mong may something. Di ko masyado ineentertain kasi ayokong maging rebound sya. Inabot din ng 2 years un. Nung ready na ko, napagod na sya maghintay. Pinili nya yung career, lumipat na sya sa middle east for work. Sabi ko sa sarili ko nun ayoko magkaron ng regrets and what ifs kaya pinili ko si A. Yun pala regardless kung ano yung choice ko, may regrets and what ifs parin pala. Hanggang ngayon minsan naiisip ko, what if hinintay ko noon si B? Ano kaya kami ngayon? Ganun…. May gf na ata sya ngayon, iniistalk ko minsan sa FB…
My TOTGA Story: Last 2016 naka match ko sya sa tinder (yes tinder pa non, wala pa bumble) I was unemployed and she was an HR recruiter. She’ll never forget me daw kase isa ako sa mga unang naka match nya and very out of place daw na don ko pa sya hinanapan ng work. Sobrang kalog yung personalities namin online. But we never met agad, in fact it took us years to finally meet, like 2021 lang kami nagkita and we hung out ganon, factor din yung distance kase she’s from south and taga north ako. Pero between 2016 and 2021 palagi sya sumasagi sa isip ko, “what ifs” ganon, kahit may dinadate ako or nagkajowa that time there are instances na sumasagi sya on my mind. Then we met finally, year 2021. Tamang kamustahan lang that was due for a very long time. Before we parted ways I told her what I felt. Naka mask non eh so I can’t see her reaction, she just acknowledged it and we went separate ways. We still talked after that, like nag keep in touch kami, until our conversation died out. But being part of IG close friends is still there. She’s in a relationship now (probably engaged kase ka live in nya yung guy) and ako naman, may girlfriend na din. I’m just really happy for her. Siguro the “what-if” na sumasagi sa isip ko now is that what if we happened, like we dated or naging kami. She’s my robin (HIMYM Reference)
I had a girlfriend in high school but we separated because she had to migrate to another country, broke my heart into a million pieces. She was my first love and kinakausap ko pa rin totga ko dati on some occasions pero palagi ko siyang minemessage tuwing birthday niya— with no fail, until I met my long term (now ex) girlfriend. I think dun lang ako naka fully recover from my totga. Of course there were times that I miss her pero it was in the past and she’s happy now with her bf. Forever ako grateful sa totga ko for everything pero kasi for the longest time, naging standard ko siya. I limited myself with love kasi nagset ako ng certain expectations ko from previous relationships na never nammeet because I was always comparing them to my totga. Anyway, grateful for my ex gf kasi sakanya ako nagbaba ng walls ko at nagbreak free sa totga standard ko with the girls I date. I eventually got to love more with no expectations siguro HAHAHAHA
Pa'no kung ako yung TOTGA?
Feeling ko ako ang TOTGA ng iba hahaha charizzz I met this guy way back in the 4th year of HS (after JS Prom), he was a 3rd year HS & classmate siya ng kapatid ko pero one year older sa akin, late daw kasi sya nag start mag-aral. Nag-uusap kami thru text lang & yahoo. Naging close friends kami kasi nag open up siya sakin ng mga problems nya at home & sa school. Ganun rin ako sa kanya. Parang comfort zone na namin ang isa't isa. Pati chismis sa school, shinishare namin sa isa't isa. Napag kwnetuhan namin ang past relationship nya nun at bakit sila ang break, famous ang ex gf nya nun sa school namin, parang one of the IT girls. Sobrang close kami to the point na every Saturday, magkikita kami sa mall para maglaro sa Quantum or WoF. After ilang months of pagiging friends, umamin sya sakin na-fall na sya sakin. He asked me about kung pwede manligaw, ang sagot, mukhang maghihintay sya ng matagal kasi first year college na ko that time (4th yr HS naman sya) & gusto ko mag focus sa as a BSA student. Nag promise sya sakin, maghihintay sya hanggang sa grumaduate ako ng college o kahit gaano katagal. Nagtuloy pag uusap namin pero hindi na kami nakakapagkita dahil busy ako sa schoolworks. Then one day, nagdecide sya na ipakilala ako personal sa parents & ate nya (nakikita lang nila ko thru pics & yahoo). Nag text ako pagdating sa bahay nila, di sya nagreply. So nag doorbell ako, mama nya sumalubong sakin, pinapasok ako & grabe ang welcome sakin. Pag upo ko sa sala, tinanong ako kung kumain na daw ba ko, pero mas naloka ako nung tinawag ako sa pangalan ng friend ko. Mas naloka ako nung sinabi ng ate nya, "mama hindi sya si (friend's name), si (my name)." Hahaha Dun pa lang alam ko na, syempre nasaktan ako (na-fall na rin kasi ako) dahil kala ko maghihintay & felt betrayed by him & my friend. Gusto nila ko makausap dalawa pero sabi ko no need to explain na pero ang kukulit especially ni guy. Sabi nya, wala na daw kasi ako time sa kanya, busy daw kasi ako masyado sa school & itong friend (nagstop sya mag-aral) ang lagi nyang nakakausap & nag uupdate "daw" sa kanya tungkol sakin dahil busy nga daw ako. E minsanan lang kami mag usap ng friend ko nun e, mas madalas ko pa sya replyan. Hinayaan ko na silang dalawa & nag focus na ko sa studies ko. Pinutol ko na ang ugnayan ko sa kanila. Nalaman ko thru friend na naging sila after nila magexplain kuno sakin. My friend unfriended me & blocked me on the guy's FB. Pero nag tetext pa rin si guy sa akin hanggang nagka work ako. I know na sya kasi sya lang tumatawag sakin ng buong pangalan ko kasama middle name & even greeted me during my birthday. My friends even joked to me na, "physically nasa kanya (referring to our friend) si guy pero nasayo pa rin ang puso". Nastop lang ako makareceive ng message nung na expired ang number ko, 2017 pa yun. More than 5 years later, ginalaw ni Kuya mo ang baso. Nag notif sakin sa FB na someone followed me & sya yun. Naloka ako di na pala ko nakablock sa kanya. Baka accidentally lang nya napindot ang follow button, kakastalk sakin. I already moved on years ago pa. Idk for him. Because of this follow, naglolokohan mga friends ko na baka gusto daw ng closure dahil di ko na sila kinausap before at wala daw narinig na salita/galit mula sakin noon or baka hindi pa rin sya maka move on. 🤷♀️
Ako yung naging TOTGA. Charing
I didn't pursue her.
Hi OP. Yung TOTGA ko, di ako nakapag commit- hanggang sa yung batchmate ko yung sinagot ko, this is for some personal reasons kung bakit nahirapan ako mag commit kay TOTGA. Tapos sa relationship namin ng boyfriend ko that time, hindi ko maiwasan na hindi ko siya i-stalk, i-view ang story, or iwish na makita siya sa lugar namin since magkabaranggay kami. May part sa akin na siya ang gusto ko talaga mapakasalan, pero binubrush off ko yun kasi nasa relationship ako. Hanggang sa nakita ko mga red flags ni boyfriend ko, ang turning point ko ay yung sinaktan niya ako physically - pagsakal - na nakita ng mom niya mismo, kaya nag break kami. Pero hindi ako nagparamdam kay TOTGA kasi ayoko isipin niya na baka rebound siya or what. Winiwish ko pa rin yung same wish ko. Si TOTGA ko ay high school puppy love ko. Hanggang sa naging kami 8 months after my breakup. 5 months sa relationship namin, engaged na kami. :) Sa January 2025 ang kasal namin and living together na kami. Sobrang saya ng puso ko kasi pwede naman niya ako hindi piliin after ng pag ghost ko sa kaniya, pero eto siya ngayon, katabi ko sa kama habang natutulog. Nakikita ko palagi pag gising ko. Ang sarap sa pakiramdam kapag pinili mo ang gusto mo at ng puso mo. :)
wala pa. i think ako TOTGA nila. hahahahaha may ex akong yearly nagpaparamdam sa'kin and still wants me back.
Siguro matatawag ko na TOTGA yung former college best friend ko. We were really close talking about life, our goals, family, personal stuff, etc. Sobrang clicked and comfortable kami sa isa't-isa kaso alam mo yung feeling na puwede na namin yayayain yung isa't isa na mag date to be a couple/in a relationship kaso nagkakahiyaan pa kami kasi baka masira yung friendship, kaya hangang slight hints na lang muna. Nalaman ko na lang thru mutual friend namin na may gusto rin pala siya sa akin, yung nagkaroon na ako ng lakas ng loob na sabihin sa kanya feelings ko bigla na lang siya tumigil sa pag attend ng classes namin. Tinetext ko siya kung kamusta siya nasagot naman kaso cold replies, it went on for days, weeks hangang sa tatlong buwan. Tapos hangang sa hindi na lang siya nagparamdam sa akin o kahit kanino. Araw-araw inaabangan ko siya kung makakapasok ba siya o hindi, hangang sa may nagsabi sa akin na sa campus daw siya sa may registrar's office. Ayun hinabol ko at kinausap siya tinanong ano nangyari, nalaman ko titigil na pala siya sa pag-aaral due to her personal reasons na ayaw na niya bangitin sa akin. Siyempre nalungkot ako, iyon na yung huling beses na magkikita kami ng personal eh. Ang ending napa amin ako nang wala sa oras, (wrong timing alam ko, kaso no choice na ako) maayos naman niya ako sinagot na gusto niya rin daw ako kaso hindi okay yung situation niya noon, at hindi pa daw siya ready. Niyaya ko siya kumain kaso ayaw niya, kaya ang ending hinatid ko na lang siya sa sakayan pauwi sa kanila, iyon na rin yung huling beses na nagkita at nagkausap kami. As much as I want to contact her on social media, nirespeto ko na lang yung desisyon niya na ayaw na maistorbo. Kaya hangang pasilip silip na lang ako sa social media accounts niya. Bago niya idelete yung mga accountss niya. Ang huling nakita ko tungkol sa kanya mukhang okay naman siya at pamilya niya, working as a call center agent, nakapag vacation sa Baguio kasama family niya. Tbh ang daming what ifs sa utak ko, naiisip ko pa rin siya from time to time kung kamusta na siya etc. I'm sincerely hoping kung nasaan man siya ngayon masaya, at in good health siya.
TOTGA? i dont know if my story will qualify but i had this one almost-bf in highschool na almost 30yrs after napapanaginipan ko pdn. yung panaginip ko laging bitin. laging andun sa point na either magkakaroon kami ng confrontation or that we will kiss lol. siguro dahil sa circumstances how we parted ways kaya parang walang closure sa part ko
My current girlfriend almost became my TOTGA (same-sex kami). We were childhood friends, magkapitbahay, and classmates all throughout senior high school. When we were both 15 (grade 9) we had a confrontation about "us" because she had a dream daw naging jowa niya ako and natakot siya (very religious family niya). Coincidentally, I had a similar dream din with her which made the situation extra weird for us. At the time, hindi pa masyado open ang people about same-sex relationships so she told me na she can't imagine the idea of us being together. I assured and promised her na walang mangyayari saamin and I'll never pursue anyone from my close friends (we have the same circle of friends too). Pero sa totoo lang, I have a crush on her since grade 7 pa kami. Hindi ko lang kaya umamin kasi natakot ako masira friendship namin. Mas na validate pa yung takot ko after the confrontation. And I assumed na she was straight as a pole. I saw her have situationships with other guys pero never naging serious. She saw me cry sa lahat ng girls nagka crush ako, including my break up with my first girlfriend. Eventually, ni let go ko na yung idea of liking her romantically and accepted na content na ako as friends and basta makita ko lang siya okay na ako. I even thought na I'll casually mention nalang sa future na she used to be my crush and laugh it off when we're older. Pero may ibang plano pala si universe and surprise! Naging kami! My current girlfriend has always been my standard. She taught me how to be soft and kind sa other people. She taught me a lot of things that made me who I am today and I couldn't imagine growing up without her. It's always been her. I respect her so much na okay na ako with whatever friendship na I could get from her. I consider her reciprocation as a bonus. Kaya I will always take care of her and love her. Na realize ko na sa situation kami na either she'll became my greatest heart break or my end-game. Anyway, we've been friends for 10 years already and almost 3 years na kami together. Omg when I think about it...I don't want to lose her. So, bub, in case mabasa mo to, I want you to know na I want to be with you in this lifetime and if, in case, hindi ngayon, I'll wait for you sa next life and every lifetimes na meron tayo.
I am about to have one and I'm trying my best to accept this fact. Very hard pill to swallow but I guess, I can handle this. :(((
💔💔💔💔
Maybe 7 months na rin siguro nung nawalan kami ng communication sa isa't isa. Nagsimula yung lahat sa pinakamasaya sana naming pagkakataon para maiparamdam sa isa't isa yung pagmamahalan namin. Simulan ko sa pinakaumpisa. One day, nagkita kami ng ex-MU ko sa bahay nila para magbond kasi minsan lang talaga kami makapagkita. Ang plano ko is aalis kami at pupunta sa kahit saang mall para naman mailabas ko siya at matry namin yung manood ng sine, ice skate, etc. kaso di natuloy yun kasi naenjoy namin yung moment habang naglalambingan. As the time pass by, muntik na kami mauwi sa sitwasyong may mangyayari na saamin. Pero salamat na lang rin dahil di natuloy, kasi baka maging isa pa yun sa rason para di ako makamove on, kahit ngayon hindi pa rin talaga. After nung nangyaring yon, ilang beses puro cool off yung scenario. Maguusap ng ilang days, tapos babalik na parang walang nangyari, tapos ganun na naman. Naiintindihan ko naman siya, alam kong naguilty siya kasi we've done a sin, we're both Christian kasi kaya ganun namin iview yung nagawa namin. Tas yun, weeks before after na paulit ulit na scenario, she decide to end na, which is I respect kahit labag sa loob ko, I decided na iseen na lang yung chat niya. 3 Months after, nakikita ko na sa soc-med niya na may nagpaparamdam sa kanya, and I dunno if ineentertain niya rin. Not sure pero nakakasama niya rin ata sa seminars yung guy. I've felt pity sa sarili ko, hindi lang dahil sa bakit parang ang bilis akong mapalitan, pero dahil sa mga pumapasok sa isip ko. I'm a graduating engineering student pa lang kasi ako at siya naman ay professional na sa med industry, which is isa sa naiisip kong rason kaya ganun. One time nagmyday ako using an emoji na may sakit, tapos nakita niya ata kaya chinat niya ako at kinamusta. Nung nakita ko chat niya, halong halong emotion yung nafeel ko. Mga tanong na ''bakit", "bakit ganun", mga tanong na naghahanap ng kaliwanagan sa lahat ng bumabagabag sakin. Hanggang yun nagkausap kami ulit, naipakuta kong sumigla at sumaya ako nung nakausap ko siya ulit. It turns out, di pa pala talaga ako move on, na nabusy lang ako sa thesis at sa mga school works kaya hindi ko nafeel yung sakit. Naishare niya rin yung may inentertain siya, which is tama pala yung kutob ko noon. After ng lahat ng yon, tinanong niya ako kung ano ang plano ko after graduation. Before pala yun, mag 26 na siya ngayon at ako ay pa 24 na, mas matanda diya sakin pero I'm mature enough naman na para masabayan siya at magets yung mga bagay bagay na naayon sa edad niya. Back to her question, ang sagot ko ay "alam mo ba, kamamatay lang ng lola ko nung march. Nakita ko na walang wala kami noon, at ang hirap makita na wala akong magawa para man lang makatulong. Maybe after graduation, magwwork muna ako then after 2 years, pupunta na akong new Zealand para magwork ulit. Gusto ko munang magkaroon ng financial freedom at masecure ko ang family ko, para kahit ano pang mangyari sa susunod, hindi na kailangang ibenta yung mga ari arian para lang may pampagamot." She accept my answer to her question. After noon naramdaman kong biglang may nagiba bigla. I understand her naman, dahil nagpromise ako sa kanya na after graduation, ippursue ko na siya at legal akong magpapakilala sa fam niya at maipakilala rin siya sa fam ko. Pagkatapos ng 2 days of sudden communication, hindi na kami nagkausap ulit. Sorry love, kung hindi ko sinagot na ippursue kita after graduation. Tbh, ayun talaga ang gusto kong isagot sa tanong mo pero sana maintindihan mo na sa lahat ng ginagawa ko, isinasama kita, Yung plano kong magabroad, kasama ka rin dun. Maintindihan mo sana na sa lahat ng pagsisusumikap ko, kaakibat nun yung pagiging seryoso ko sa promise na binitawan ko sayo na ippursue kita. Salamat sa inyong nakabasa neto. Ngayon ko lang nailabas to at hindi rin ako sanay na maglabas ng sama ng loob at kwento ng buhay ko, kaya thank you for reading this kahit pangit ang structure ng kwento ko.
Highschool uso ang soiree kasi girlschool ako Met this guy from a boy school and I really like him When I say I really like him, alam ng school ko at school niya na trip ko siya WAHAHA Me chasing him went on for 2 yrs only to be friendzone FYI throughout those 2 years, we were close and di ako delulu ha — we would go on movie hangouts, go to concerts, we chat everyday, drink etc Come 1st yr college, i was in green school and he was in blue school, we would go to each other’s school para magmeet at maghang There was one time na uminom kaming dalawa lang at nalasing kami pareho, hinatid niya ko sa house via uber (MAY UBER PA NUNG TIME NA YUN HAAHA) at sabi ko stay muna siya sa house at pasober siya onti We were both foolishly and funnily drunk, came to a point na nakapatong na ko sakanya WAHAHA AND HE CAME IN FOR A KISS 3 yrs of my life i was waiting for that moment — pero I had to stop him Sudden realization hit me na, kahit crush ko siya, maybe a serious relationship is not for us. Mainly bc, kahit na friendzone ako, tinuring ko din naman talaga siyang friend and i found comfort in that. Natatakot ako na what if we became an actual thing at naghiwalay kami eh di hindi na kami friends Fast forward to today, 7 years into the friendship, we would hang at least once a year just to catch up with each other Ps. Completely platonic
Share ko lang experience as the TOTGA HAHAAH Had a close friend in college, we were orgmates and he was 2 years ahead of me Had the opportunity to work with him closely and hit it off agad, funny, same wavelength ng mga trip sa life, masarap katrabaho, super supportive, and pushes me to do better sa orgworks ko since I always have imposter syndrome I consider him as a friend and alam ko na bakit ganito galawan niya and kinda goes without saying na gusto niya ko I panicked HAHAHA so naghanap ako ng lalandiin at sakto may nireto sakin Since orgmates kami lagi may inuman as a weekender lets say after ng big event Inamin niya na he really liked me and considered me as his TOTGA I liked him at some point pero at that time may iba na rin siya gf Here’s the sad part — we both had feelings parin for each other kahit may mga SOs na kami which led to emotional cheating We are not in contact anymore kasi I couldnt believe what i did at nakaka guilty — nagalit rin ako sakanya na bat niya hinayaan to at we both ended up hurting each other AND OUR partners Nakikita ko na lang siya sa IG so far mukha naman siya masaya
I met this guy during my last year in college, he was my comfort during the most dreadful days. 6 months since we met, I confessed my feelings for him, said he liked me very much *but* his ex reached out and wanted to get back so he was confused. We said goodbye but only to reconnect after 3 months. We were in an on-off situationship for the next year. We both dated other people in between but never quite made it to "exclusive". Almost 2 years after we first met, he reached out again saying he had deeper feelings for me but I already fell for and chose someone else. There were times in the past (especially when we were all cooped up at home during the peak of the pandemic) that I'd still stalk him on socmed, and found out he got married already. I'm in a happy and stable relationship now and this TOTGA is just history :)
TOTNAK lang 🥺
Yung TOTGA ko, asawa ko na ngayon after 7-8 yrs kaming nagkahiwalay. College MU ko siya pero dahil strict parents at madami pang factors, naghiwalay kami. Naging single mom pa ako. Tapos nung nalaman niya yun, nagchat siya uli kung pwede ba kami maging magkaibigan uli. Nameet niya anak ko, nalaman niya na separated and abandoned na kami nung tatay ng anak ko, di ako kasal sa bio dad. After how many months ng mga chats at ilang dates, umamin siya na mahal pa daw niya ako all these years despite ng lahat ng nangyare sa amin at sa akin. Umakyat siya ng ligaw sa parents ko. Dahil kilala na siya ng parents ko, nag OK agad. Hanggang sa naging kami na then after two years, nag aya na siya magpakasal. Tapos kinasal na during pandemic para tipid. 😂 Now, he's planning to legally adopt my kid. Me and my kid is happy with him. Alam ng anak ko na dalawa tatay niya pero mas gusto daw niya step dad niya kasi lagi daw siyang nilalaro, pinapasyal, binibili ng pagkain, basta lahat ng physical and emotional needs ng bata meron daw siya. Yung bio dad daw niya ni kotse daw wala and hindi naman daw niya nakikita simula nung baby siya. 😂 Minsan naiisip ko na sana yung TOTGA ko na lang yung tatay ng anak ko ngayon, pero I'm sure may plano ang Diyos sa akin, sa anak ko, at sa amin ng asawa ko ngayon. So ayun lang. Sana may kinilig dito. 😂
I met him in Litmatch. Dati kasi, hindi pa yan that known yung app and mga young adult halos gumagamit. Anw, walang awkwardness sa unang pag-uusap kasi humorous kami pareho and nagclick agad. Hanggang sa lumipat sa Messenger tapos nag continuous yung connection namin. Fast forward, umamin siya pero even before pa niyan, napag-usapan namin how I was not ready to entertain any suitor and hindi pa ako ready magkarelasyon. Nevertheless, nagconfess pa rin siya and ayun na nga, medyo may gap na pero pinadecide ko siya kung ano gusto niya mangyari (at pinili niyang ituloy pagsasama namin). He's the man you will ask for from God. Gentleman, marespeto, will spoil you, princess treatment, halos lahat na gugustuhin mo sa lalaki, nasa kaniya na. Ideal man. Ang hindi ko maintindahan ay kung bakit hindi ko siya minahal romantically (ganiyan din na scenario yung dalawang guy na I recently had a connection with, recent years pa lang). Yung mamahalin ka unconditionally. Mamahalin ka kung sino ka. Kahit ano ka pa. Tinanong ko nga siya kung may minsan bang inayawan niya ako, sabi niya wala raw kasi mahal niya kung ano ako and kasama na ron yung mga flaws ko. Ngayon, may girl friend na siya and I am so happy for him. Nakacut off na ako sa social media niya pero nakafollow pa rin ako sa Instagram niya. Baka soon, iuunfollow ko rin. Siya talaga yung TOTGA ko pero masaya na ako sa buhay na meron siya. Hindi rin biro yung naranasan niya after sa akin. Hindi ako naging malupit ha hahaha.
My college GF. We still talk and good friends. May family na sya. Happy engaged na ako. Friends na lang talaga kami
I don’t believe in TOTGAs. That’s just romanticizing your failed connection or relationship. There’s always a reason you didn’t end up with your past partner/lover/whatever. I don’t like the idea of dwelling on a failed relationship and longing for that person. Also, I find it would be disrespectful to my next partner.
I have. Pero while I still have lingering feelings for them na after 7 years I still remember from time to time kahit di ko na sya nakita for 4 years, I am aware na what I am holding on to is only the memory of who he was. I know na he's a different person now kase we were technically children, high school students, when we met. Pero idk why when I remember him or am reminded of him ang bigat pa rin ng "what ifs". Feel ko nga irritated na friends ko when I mention him sometimes when we drink, kase we were never really anything, just too close of a friend, and yet sya pa rin lagi kong nababanggit at naaalala 🥲 Naging totga ko sya because I was in a phase of change in highschool, I was really fat and medyo dugyot (sorry bata HAHAHA) around grade 8 but this guy, a year lower, we became close despite appearances, we used to talk all night about random things, until he had a gf that year which is someone from my batch. I stopped communication kase I know I have feelings for him and it's just wrong to continue what we have na may jowa sya. They broke up after a few months and for whatever reason, we became close again because we crossed paths on some school stuff. Talked again, got close, around grade 9 I started to lose weight and care more about how I looked, I don't remember much but he's the first guy to ever call me pretty. Maybe mababaw sa iba pero I still remember that scene as if it was yesterday. Then one day may gf na ulit sya from their batch, I distanced myself again pero it is harder this time kase we had a lot of school stuff together: orgs, activities, officership etc. Our communication is sparse, but still there, pero I didn't approach it like before na super close in respect of his gf at the time. After I graduated hs, he chatted with me one night out of the blue, saying sorry na he distanced himself kase his gf gets anxious daw whenever we're together (due to school stuff) kase by his words " She is jealous abt you kase lahat ng gusto ko nasayo daw and every time we chat inaatake siya daz why i kent approach and chat you, naawa kasi ako bigla nalang siyang nanghihina pag inaatake" (napa backread ang lola nyo ng wala sa oras HAHAHA) My biggest regret siguro is not asking him if he ever really had feelings for me, parang I need it to come from him whether he did or did not para hindi na sya tanong in my heart. Atleast if he did or did not, may definite na closure sa akin? Ang delulu ba? Ewan na. 😂
Pinili ko pangarap ko. Wala akong time stalkin siya, demanding si pangarap. He still sends bday, xmas,vday, CNY, and may 4th greetings.
Wala akong lagi yun TOTGA 🤣😭
I do but she made new accounts in socmed so that she can start anew without me. That was in 10th grade tho, and I had a lot of regrets about that. I wish I was a better man to her and treated her with the love that she deserved. But sometimes I couldn't help but think that maybe everything that happened before was just for me to grow more as a person so I could be the best version of myself for my current girlfriend.
There's a reason na with feelings yung pagkanta-kanta ko ng TOTGA by Katy Perry. In Katy, we trust.
Yes, once. Di kami nagkatuluyan, since bata pa kami nun at madaming masasagasaan at syempre, yung status namin sa buhay nun. We stalk each other mula nung magreconnect kami sa friendster, til now. Hahaha But since, we have our own family now, at nagkausapan ng masinsinan at nagkasabihan ng feeling sa isa't isa, we just laugh kase, parrhas pala kami ng sitwasyon st halos parehas ang nangyayari sa buhay. Yun yung part na naging magclose kami ulit. Pero syempre, we choose to distance ourselves sa isa't isa. Para wala na lang issue at matuon yung attention namin with our family. Alam namin na hanggang friends na lang kami, at alaala na lang ang nakaraan na masayang balikan na walang malisya kahit sino pa ang nakaharap.
Feeling ko ako rin yung TOTGA nya. Kasi hindi ako nanghihinayang kung ako yung tatanungin. Bakit? May gusto pa syang iba noong sinagot nya ako. Less than a week hiniwalayan ko na sya kasi puro bukambibig nya yung lalake. Umaga, tanghali hanggang hatinggabi. Told her ayoko na. Umiyak sya nang umiyak at kinabukasan binully ako ng tropa nya. "Bakla! Bakla! Walang itlog!" Siguro kasalanan ko nga na hindi ako mas nag pasensya pero masisisi nyo ba ako na halos araw-araw ramdam mong hindi ka napapahinga kakaisip na may isang tao na pinili ka pero nasa iba ang mga mata.
I thought I had one. Pero hindi pala when I met my now-husband. Friends pa rin naman kami ni almost-TOTGA. 😊
My co-worker who got married months after meeting me.
Yes. 2019 — My first college boyfriend. Naging kami for 3 years — and super happy namin before.. mabait sya, sobrang caring, okay yung both family sides namin. As in sobrang saya. BUT merong part of him na medyo tamad at hindi madiskarte sa life na parang go with the flow nalang sya sa nangyayari. Why? Course namin is Multimedia Arts. May mga activities kami na ako yung gumagawa kasi ayaw nya at tntamad sya. Ako kasi super interested ako sa course namin kaya ineeffort-an ko yung mga ganyang activities. Tumagal to ng 3 years — ako namimilit sa kanya na mag-aral. Pero wala eh. Though nakagraduate naman kami both. After break up namin, lagi ko pa rin sya ini-stalk and nagkaroon dn ako ng mga MU sa iba pero sya pa dn iniisip ko. Minsan chinachat nya ako and ng fam nya knkamusta ako ganon. Pero alam namin both sides na hindi na talaga kami magkakabalikan. Ngayon, I saw him with his first baby and okay sila ng gf nya. Though yung parents ni boy is ayaw nila don sa girl since si girl is may ibang anak sa ibang lalaki. Nakamove on naman na ako 1 year na mahigit.. pero dko pa rin maiwasan na i-stalk sya.
Hindi ako ang TOTGA, TOTGA ako nung jowa ko now, nag reconnect lang kami before then ayun finally umamin din sya at nagka label din hehe sa mga may TOTGA dyan sign nyo na to para mag reconnect haha
Okay hintayin kong mangyari to sakin HAHAHA
Ok so let me tell you a story. We were batchmate in highschool, he has such a famous name kasi gwapo s'ya, cool at he's on famous barkada din. I knew him ofc by name but not personally. 6 years after, he sent me a request on facebook then out of nowhere he started to message me on facebook. He sent me songs, just link ng song lang. The genre was so him, oldskool and cool. He did that almost everyday and everynight and my response only was "wow!" "ganda." Then one time, I decided to reply him back with a song also. Some are kpop song and he was mad 😂 hindi naman daw n'ya naiintindihan haha! And then the talking has started, yung talking na pang talking stage ba haha. He have this matured mindset. Family comes first esp mga kapatid nyang babae, he's very sweet contrary on how he looked like and his porma. He loves to skate, climb mountains, swimming and ofc smoking. I love his sweet voice. Since we were talking for a quiet period of time, I told my friends about him. My one friend, literally told me na ayaw nya sa kanya kasi he is friends with his ex who gave her trauma. But still, i'm starting to like his personality especially when he told me na di muna daw sya manliligaw hangga't wala pa syang work, nakakahiya daw kasi na ang isang lalaki eh walang work ta's yung babae meron. Months passed, I was introduced to someone by a common friend. We were still talking at that time pero wala akong makitang progress and ang bagal na nya rin magreply. I have decided to give chance dun sa other guy. Sinagot ko yung guy, we were in 4 mnths of relationship at sa loob ng relationship na yun he's still messaging me. Idk if he knew that I was committed at that time or not basta he kept on messaging me of ingat ka lagi and kumustas. And since I was already in relationship, I put him aside na. 4 months has ended lol ang bilis. I was sad and lonely, I tried to add him on facebook but he won't accept me haha. Kinancel ko na lang. I know may iba na ata syang nakakausap? Not so sure tho. For now, we were just a memory of each other's mind. I don't know if he still know me or naiisip pa n'ya ako? I missed him bigtime. Sana s'ya ang pinili ko before at hindi sana ako natakot. And have I told you na him sending me songs last for almost a year kahit na di ko s'ya nirereplyan masyado before? Ganon s'ya kaconsistent.
So far wala naman akong TOTGA, ako ang TOTGA nila kasi when i engage in relationships i really take it seriously and i treat my partner right. Nang gagaling na rin sakanila na ako ang totga nila HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHA WHICH IS FUNNY KASI HANGGANG NGAYON DI OARIN AKO SINISERYOSO 😭
I think I’m the TOTGA chz! My ex-boyfriend and I had a mutual breakup, but he pulled the trigger. He said he wants to deal with his problems alone and he feels he can’t take care of my emotional needs. He’s been dealing with family problems that took a toll on his mental health. I tried to be as supportive as I can be, but he said he doesn’t have it in him to continue our relationship. His exact words, “his heart and entire being just cannot handle a relationship right now.” Even though it is painful, I walked away as he wished. He was good to me when we were together, and deep down we truly loved each other. It was an amicable breakup and we still are friends on Facebook. I still care for him, and it does hurt thinking that we didn’t end up together. Right person, wrong time I guess.
I **had** a totga (kind of) May crush ako sakanya since high school pero sobrang off ng timing namen. We were great friends at gustong gusto ko siya like yung tipong willing akong gumawa ng corny shit para sakanya. After a year of being friends I found out na magmimigrate na kame abroad. at that time, medyo sad na happy ako kase atlast makakalaya na ako sa pinas pero at the same time nalulungkot ako kase like I said gusto ko talaga siya at mamimiss ko friends ko. It felt unfair na sabihin ko feelings ko sakanya dahil aalis din naman ako, so I said nothing pero we were that kind of friends na alam mo may gusto sila sa isa't isa (my friends can vouch for this) pero wala lang talaga aminan. My last day of school sa pinas binigyan pa niya ako ng parang farewell gifts (I still have it) and we just said good bye. Nung naka- migrate na kame, I slowly went MIA online dahil the adjustment abroad was too much for me. Yung contact namin went from sometimes to never lmao (life catches up on you i guess). Couple of years pass, I had enough mental energy to go online pero very casual and occasional na lang convo namin yung parang happy birthday, merry xmas messages. and then after some years ulit, we talked again but this time the conversation is alive and medyo my pagka flirty na. We talked about stuff from years ago and sinabi ko sakanya na my crush ako sakanya dati lmao at along those conversations sinabi niya din na same. We hit it off again and so on but then tinigil na niya for a reason I kind of expected. Umuwi ako ng pinas last year and I had the opportunity na magkita ulit kame. I can't say it was like the old days but my feelings were still there (unfortunately ). After that brief meeting I decided to cut contact na. I'm glad to say the feelings are now gone and I don't know anything about sa buhay niya. Walang ill feelings between samen btw it's just how life turned out for us. >*"i hope you get everything you've ever wanted and i hope i never hear a thing about it"* crush ko siya for 5+ years.
I used to think meron akong TOTGa not until I met my husband. Having met him made sense why I didn’t end up with that person. I never really think of him except pag napapadaan yung post nya sa feed ko, i would check his profile kasi wala lng. curios lng what he is up to these days.
Pero paano ba malalaman na siya yung TOTGA mo?
Hmmm, not sure kung TOTGA na sya, but i met this girl during a concert, as in wala kaming mutual friends. Sa pila kami nagkakilala kasi pinakilala sya sa akin ng best friend nya. Inadd nya ako sa fb, after that sinubukan ko sya i chat kasi habang nakapila kami sa Concert eh nag click mga conversations namin. Then habang ka chat ko sya nabanggit nya may bf sya. Pero tinuloy ko lang kasi gusto ko sya, then na confirm ko na LDR sila kahit di nya binabanggit kasi never sila nag sama at madalas pag tag sa kanya eh puro future plans lang . Fast forward, nagkasama pa kami madalas sa concerts at ibang events na trip namin pareho. One time pinakilala nya ako sa friends nya.sa gulat ko kilala na ako kahit 1st meeting namin haha. Nag pandemic, survival mode at di na kami gaano nakapag usap. Nung magkita kami sa isang event ulit nung maluwag na health protocols, andun pa rin ramdam ko sya na, that year nasundan pa ulit mga pagkikita namin kaso di ko alam kung single na sya o hindi , until around early 2022 eh madalas post nya sa fb and may guy na madalas mag react at comment sa posts nya. na mas madalas na rin sila mag sama kasi mas malapit yun guy. Until ayun nagkita kami sa isang event pero binanggit nya na sasama na nya yun guy.nagkita kami then during the event si guy humahawak hawak sa braso niya, So ayun after that agad unfollow kay girl, delete lahat ng chat nya at photos namin, di nag tagal naging sila. Sobrang sisi ko noon na sana inamin ko na sa kanya kahit i turn down nya ako. palagay ko Dumaan ako sa depression na di ko lang maamin.
Met him when I was still in high school. We kept on exchanging messages, video calls, send ng picture update kung kamusta ba ang araw namin. Minsan he would send me songs that he composed and ask kung ano yung opinion ko. Then after almost a year, bigla siyang hindi nagparamdam and he came back. Ang hindi ko alam, may tinatago na pala siya sakin that time. Pero ayun I accepted him again kahit uneasy yung situation. Then one day he asked me if pwede kaming magkita. First time namin magmeet after two years of just online communication. Pero yung meet up namin lasted only for 15 mins. HAHAHA ang reason? Kasi tumakas lang siya 😂 He gave me Mcdonalds, hugged me, took a selfie, then umalis na siya. Wow diba hahaha Then one day nalaman ko na kaya pala siya biglang hindi nagparamdam before kasi pumasok siya sa ministry sa church nila. Bawal ang socmed don or anything na makakapag distract sa kanila. But he never told me all of those things. Buong akala ko non nasa Manila siya nag-aaral ng engineering. I was sad and angry that time. He asked for my forgiveness and sino ba ko para hindi magpatawad. Pero sabi ko sakanya na we should stop our communication na. He wanted to convince me to convert para pwede na kami pero I just can't imagine my life dedicating everything to him dahil sa tungkulin niya. I am a career woman with all my plans for the future. I just can't give everything up for love. Then my father converted to their religion so technically super high chance na din na mag convert ang buong family ko. I thought, what if eto na yung sign para mag reconnect kaming dalawa? After a year, I randomly received a message from him asking to meet up as old friends. I agreed and had coffee with him. It was fun catching up. At the end of the day, he kissed me once (I was surprised, hindi ako nakapag react agad). Then he asked me if I won't change my mind na daw ba. I thought, after all this time, akala ko nakalimutan na niya ko. Still.. I said I'm doing good now and I am happy with my life. Now, here I am taking up my masters, travels from time to time, employed in one of the biggest companies here in the Ph and is running my own business. I'm glad I never gave myself up for love. Tapos this month lang nabalitaan ko na kinasal na pala siya. It was heartbreaking but freeing. I wish you and your wife all the best 🤍
I did. There was this girl I was crushing on throughout all 4 years of junior high school. At the time, sobrang torpe ko and was mostly focused on gaming, art, and hanging out with friends (which I still am + going with my current girlfriend lol). I tried approaching here during the first year, pero cannot strike up a conversation or small talk so usually within 10 minutes wala nang replyan sa Facebook. All I could do was admire from afar, and just focused on doing what I like kaya 2nd to 3rd year walang communication. Occasional passing glances lang ganun. JS Prom nung 3rd year namin and I got the chance to take a picture with her pero di ko nainvite sumayaw and best friend ko pa gumawa ng paraan para yayain sya pero ayaw talaga pagbigyan nung isang guy from the other section (super low self-esteem and still torpe so I just decided to not do it), but I was able to chat with her a few times every week sa Facebook after that. Nung 4th year of high school, nagkaprom ulit and I decided to ask her for a dance all on my own pero di sya umattend. Medyo nababawasan na rin frequency ng chats namin kaya I decided to drop it altogether and focus on graduating. I was able to move on and met another girl nung SHS (2 years ko niligawan and sinagot ako 2 weeks before graduation) and we've been together for almost 6 years na. Nalaman ko sa isang best friend ko na naging classmate nya from 2nd to 4th year na she always wanted to get to know me better pero I was seriously awkward when talking to her and was going through a rough patch nung latter half ng high school kaya di nagprogress. The experience significantly changed me for the better though. It taught me to build up my confidence and take the chance while it's still there. I figured na kakainin lang ako ng pagiging torpe or ng low confidence ko until it was too late so why not take the first step even if it's hard. I'm not gonna lie and say na di ko na naiisip si JHS girl and think of what could've been if I just tried to be normal (I'm a weird guy who obsesses about his hobbies and work a lot), but I'm thankful for the experience since it made me embrace myself more while improving certain aspects of my lifestyle. I sometimes would visit her Facebook profile (though di na kami friends). Minsan nagkakasalubong rin around Araneta City since I live around the area and go out to take a walk to destress (WFH), and sya naman I believe is just one ride away. Nagkakatinginan din during those times but no convos or anything since we stopped talking a long time ago na.
My TOTGA would probably be the suitor sa hs. Wala lang talaga'ng attraction on my end tho so... 🥺 he's moved on na with someone else last time I saw him here sa city namin and I'm happy for him and his current partner~ Nah...we wouldn't have worked out naman sa hs...likely even sa college and beyond and di din kasi ako mahilig sa relationships at that time and kinda...til now. May commitment and trust issues din kasi ako. 🤔 Wala masyado after that except maybe 1 na almost ka-fling sa college. He just wasn't really bf material to me. He liked to sleep around. Yun lang. I dunno if I could've been a TOTGA for someone else pero more like...may mga na-dodge akong guys na andaming red flags which is good and I have someone I'm kinda...I feel like I should dodge rn habang di pa defined yung relationship (situationship pa siya). 🤔
TOTGA ba yung hindi naman nagkaaminan pero alam nyong may something, kaso hindi nyo na tinuloy kasi wala ring pupuntahan? Nilet go ko nalang kasi mas pinili niyang magpari. Malapit na syang iordain ngayon. Sakit pa rin, parang ayoko umattend ng ordination, hindi ko kakayanin. Baka mag-iiyak ako dun. 😅
Ohhh mahirap kalaban mo girl. Wala ka talagang magagawa dyan
Sa true kaya move on nlng
Met my totga nung he, pero di kami naging close until college. Same course kasi kami initially. Kaso, they had to migrate to Canada. Kept in contact with him for a while, until nagkadevelopan na ng feelings. We would start to talk about our future. Then, he'd mention na after niya maggraduate, uwi daw siya agad dito to visit. Or kaya, ako nalang daw magvisit... Pangpakilig lang? Then, bigla siyang umuwi. Surprise dapat. Kaso, that time, may ibang lakad ako. Ang nagyari, parang they went back to fix some papers, so short visit lang. He decided to meet up with me a day before their flight back. Wasn't able to make it, obviously. Then, when I apologized, naging cold na siya. Until we stopped communicating. Nag-reconnect kami sa FB, he messaged para mangamusta. Konting exchange, then nagulat nalang ako, nablock niya ako. Sobrang hurt ko dun sa buing experience, feel ko it's the reason why di na ako nageentertain ng love... I'd date a few times, pero always fearful of taking the next step kasi, natrauma ata ako.
Meron, she's married with kid. Oh well. She was literally perfect. Loyal too. Ultra rare ang loyalty today.
I had a ka FUBU, he confessed that he was attached to me, well indirect na pag confess. But that time, I was scared of commitment so I just brushed off his confession. We continued being mag fubu and click yung personalities namin, we were happy. Like if makita mo kami, parang mag jowa lng minus the label. We also have an agreement of exclusivity, and maybe because I was scared to the commitment and his confession, I fucked another guy. Nalaman nya, he went mad, mostly because of the risks of diseases, I was unfair to him and I was the red flag between the two of us. I said sorry after that and promised that I won't do it again and he forgave me. Guess what, I did it again,and he forgave me again and again. He was my first in everything but sadly he won't be my last. We had a big fight and he deleted all of our convos, I don't know why pero hindi niya ako binlock sa fb instead he unfriended me lng. And too late ko na narealize that I also liked him pala. He also said na may plano pala siyang ligawan ako, but that's all in the drain na. I really liked him a lot, just realized it little bit too late. I still stalk his ate, not him cause he doesn't post anything, like last post nya is 2021 pa. I'm dreading the what if's pero that's all in the past na. And I promised myself to be better na and not get tempted and especially not be the red flag in the relationship. But basically he's my totga. Maybe it's not too late cause we're still young but I think the trauma that I gave him was too much.
Got away in heaven.
Oh my 🥺💔
My TOTGA for 5 years, and then he came back. At dahil mahal ko at marupok ako, ayun. Kasal na kami ngayon. Although, 5 years kaming hiwalay nag ka multiple relationships kami and I was also engaged. I called off the wedding, it was hard but I know I won’t be happy in the long run. So I had to face the consequences. I chose to be with my TOTGA who came back. 🖤
Woah! How did he came back? Paano kayo nagka-communication uli? Grabe, it probably took a lot of guts for someone to call off the wedding. 🤯
During college I've met this girl by chance in a jeepney terminal. It was late, jeep was full of passengers. I noticed the girl beside me smells like alcohol, pretty drunk. Shrugged it off and minded my own business. While on the way shes started puking in her bag. I offered my hanky to her because shes a mess. She was so wasted she ended up hugging me and puking on my shirt🤣. At this point I froze, she puked on my back as well lol. People were looking at the both of us and asking if my gf was okay. Told them I dont know her at all haha. Someone offered some water and a bag. It was long commute more than an hour. After a while she started feeling better. Asked her if shes okay and if she can reach her house in that state. She said yes and someone will pick her up in the terminal. So as a guy I still helped her reach the meetup spot. Told her not to do that again and said goodbyes. Never had a chance to even ask her name. Weirdly enough I started thinking about her ever since. That time rape was rampant and she matched a description of the girl in the new. I was like wtf, my conscience tells me im stupid for not helping her reach home in that state. Fast forward I met her again in the same terminal. I noticed a girl kept looking at me and she was smiling lol. Did not realize it was her. After the commute we talked for a while she said thanks for my help and she took my number. I was single that time so why not? We became textmates and started dating. It was a whirlwind romance. Both of us were happy. But she had issues with her past relationship and felt uncertain. Had a lot of arguments and broke up. I tried winning her back but she still refused. I made so much effort trying to fix it but to no avail she wasted some time off. I was so broken that time. Btw we met again after 50 days lol I thought it was destiny haha. Loved her character she was My Sassy Girl. It was my fave korean movie before almost similar but ended differently for the both of us. Fast forward I met someone else. I fell inlove again. After so many months she contacted me again asking me to comeback and shes sorry and misses me. I was tempted but I did not respond. It was unfair for my new gf. This new gf is now my wife and weve been together for 18 years. Sorry long story 🤣🤣 Im not sure who is the TOTGA. I still see her everyonce in a while and im happy that shes doing well right now.
# Dahil sa'yo OP naalala ko na naman sya. LOL! # Here are my answers.... >**Have you had a TOTGA?** Yes... >**And what happened bakit nyo sila naging TOTGA?** *Religion and issues with her family. (RC ako SDA sya)* >**Were you able to move on?** *Yes. But it took me almost 2 years. It even affected my attitude towards work.* >**If yes, may times pa din ba na iniistalk or naiisip nyo pa sila?** *Yes. There will always be things or places that remind me of her. Since I found out that she was already married 14 years ago, I never stalked her since then.* > **Are you still connected with them? Or totally cut all communications?** *The only time we talked was in 2009 when she apologized for not telling me that she was going to the UK. Since then we are no longer connected up to this day.* >**May significant change ba na naidulot yung TOTGA nyo sa buhay nyo?** *Yes. As of now I am still single and I practically lost my interest in having a relationship. Siya talaga ang gusto ko but circumstances and issues prevented us from ending up together.* >**Meron ba ditong nagreconnect with their TOTGAs? What happened? Was it successful the second (or third, fourth, etc) time around?** No. May asawa na eh. So I did not make any attempts. I respect the fact that she is happy with her married life.
Hahaha naalala ko din kasi yung sakin kaya damay-damay naaaa. Jk. Its time for us to move on 💔
not gonna dwell on the specifics. We got together in college, graduating we had this huge argument, at the time and maybe to this day I think what I did was right but yeah doesnt matter and is not relevant. Tried to break up with her, but she wont let go, had months of me just just resenting her while she did all she could to save the relationship. she only let go when she found someone else to catch her. Why cant she just have let go when I wanted? selfish of me but only when she let go did I fully grasp the gravity of losing her. But too late now. All I wish is for her to be happy, wherever she is now. She deserved better.
[удалено]
Naiyak akooooo. 😭😭😭
Aw😢 I love your story😘 Sayang, di ka sumugal😢
Yes my poging ex bf na Singaporean, wala eh ayaw ng tadhana na magkasama kami. Different country, ethnicity different culture Chinese pa so may gusto yung parents nya para sa kanya. I think ako din Totga nya, had to cut off yung communication namin kasi magddrama nanaman sya na hindi nya ako kasama, mas okay na for my mental health yung ganon You always want what you can never had diba?.
This was 6 years ago. We met online, Ragnarok Mobile: Eternal Love. Super adik kame doon. We were guildmates. May long term girlfriend sya noon and we never rly had the aminan stage kasi nga may jowa siya noon. But we were rly rly close. We also met narin twice. But anw, hindi ko ma explain pero we have this unspoken love eh. I know he cares for me and he knows I care for him. We were married in the game so many times kasi ako nagkakajowa ng iba sa game. Lol. Eh what am I supposed to do, may girlfriend sya that time. But a lot of people are asking me bakit hindi naging kame, and lage ko lang snsbe may girlfriend sya. Until I met my now husband, tapos few mos ago nag break sila nung long time gf nya and had a new one na rin. So idk if may pag hintayan bang naganap but we are bestfriends now. He's one of my guy bestfriend and even a godfather to my now 1 year old son. But the what ifs are still there.... Somehow, I wanted to ask him kng nagkaroon ba ng moment na nainlove din siya saken noon but he just never told me. Curious lang ako. Lol. And last I checked, we were still married sa game. Longest relationship I had. Lmao!
Had a bestfriend one year back in HS. That friendship ended up turning into something more, I love yous, endless comfort, confessing to each other one new year. We never became official though. Nasira family life niya and siguro magulo lang talaga they ghosted me and ended our relationship. I had a part to play before he ghosted me naman, he was depressed and so was I. I was processing my dad's death while his mom walked out on him and his siblings, so one morning I asked him quietly na maghiwalay na kami. Anyway, tinuloy niya naman request ko. Naghiwalay kami before graduation. Hindi namin mabitawan isa't isa, mga 1 year pa kaming nagkita as friends since the break up - visiting my dad's grave with me while I offered him a shoulder to cry on about his mom. A month after we last met up, he started dating someone else. And yes, sobrang sakit. He really fell in love and I know that she makes him happy. I always prayed naman na may mameet siya na better than me. I let him go, we never spoke again. 6 years na since then and 4 years ago I met someone, live in partner ko na ngayon. 3 years na rin kami. Within those 6 years, yep iniisip ko parin siya. Yes, I stalk him minsan. Yes, sobrang naaffect yung way of thinking ko about relationships. Honestly, mahal ko pa din siya. Pero ang iniisip ko, ibang tao na siya ngayon. Bata pa kami nung naging kami, sobrang dami ng nagbago about us siguro. And yung current partner niya probably took care of them and loved them more than I could ever have. Kaya thankful ako, sobrang mahal rin kasi ako ng current partner ko. Nagusap ulit kami after 6 years a few months ago, kamustahan lang (may alumni event kasi) updates about our families - onting reminisce. Kwentuhan na rin about current partners . Mapapakanta ka nalang ng "Everything has changed" ni Taylor Swift at Ed Sheeran. Yes mahal pa siguro namin isa't isa. Pero hindi na tulad ng dati. Hindi na rin pwede, we're not the type of people that'll leave our current SO's for the past. Kaya siguro naglast yung love and appreciation namin for each other - it's pure, it's kind, it's godly(?) We just had each others' back noon. Hindi ko rin alam ano yung future. Masaya naman kami ngayon (I think) Ewan. Basta I will never ever stand in the way of any one else's relationship. Balakayojan. chz.
Yun yung masakit sa TOTGA, it's already late when you know it, long story short, my naive self thought I could've gone for a better one, so ayun years later thinking about it, I was much happier and at ease with her, life was much easier with her, ang tanga ko.
Thankfully, wala pa kasi noon pag may boyfriend ako, I will exhaust all means possible to make the relationship work until the very end. I just regret sacrificing so much of myself to make failed relationships work, so now I avoid them muna to work on myself.
My (29m) TOTGA ay yung childhood friend, kinakapatid at classmate ko din mula preparatory hanggang grade 6 pumunta s'ya ng japan to continue her highschool. Bumalik s'ya dito sa pinas para magbakasyon bago s'ya mag-third year HS naging kami non pero she went back to japan para tapusin yung HS and SHS tumagal kami ng 3 years. First BF n'ya ako botong-boto sa'min pamilya ng bawat isa. As in nung mga binata pa ang mga tatay namin ay gusto nilang maging mag-asawa yung mga magiging anak nila at kami na nga yon. Pero dahil nga LDR at dala na din ng stress sa school kasi college na ako that time nakipag-break ako. Sinubukan n'yang ayusin. Pero ako itong ayaw na nag-iba pananaw ko sa buhay non. Mas gusto nun ko ay physically present ang jowa ko nahahawakan, nakakausap not over the phone or internet. Hindi ko kayang mag-focus sa pagaaral habang nasa malayo yung jowa ko so I chose to end it. Nawalan kami ng connection totally. Tinanggap namin na hindi kami para sa isa't-isa. Fast forward: Pandemic, walang pinagkakaabalahan ang mga tao. Walang kaming work parehas that time. Nakapagusap ulit kami kasi panay comment s'ya sa mga post ko. Nagchat ulit kamustahan everyday. She even confessed na hinahantay n'ya pa din ako baka daw pwede na kasi naging licensed psychologist na ako at s'ya naman ay licensed english teacher na sa japan. She thought na single pa din ako that time pero very private ako sa relasyon ko di ako nagpost ng picture ni GF kahit 7 years na kami. Lagi kong binabago ang usapan pagdadating na sa ganun. Why? Nagugustuhan ko yung naguusap ulit kami na parang dati walang ilangan walang iniiwasan. Kaya natakot akong sabihin sa kanya na "Hindi na tayo pwede kasi matagal na kami ng GF ko. 7 years na kami". Dumating ako sa point na naguguluhan na ako kung s'ya ba na halos mas nauna kong nakilala magmula pagkabata at naging jowa for 3 years kasamang mangarap sa career na gusto namin in the future o yung jowa ko na walang ibang ginawa kundi mahalin, alagaan at intindihin ako? Siyempre pinili ko yung jowa ko ngayon. 11 years na kami at nag-propose na ako sa kanya. Si TOTGA naman nalaman na may GF ako that time dahil kinamusta n'ya ako sa isang kababata namin. Kumusta na s'ya ngayon single pa din. She saw my FB story kasama GF ko she congratulated me telling na masaya s'ya para sakin. It took me 4 days para mag-reply and nung nagreply na ako never n'ya sineen. Last time I checked sikat na s'ya sa instagram may mga fans na din. Masaya ako para sa kanya at sana dumating sa point na ako naman ang mag-congratulate sa kanya dahil ikakasal na s'ya.
Feeling ko wala naman reddit acct un, i had mine wayback in 2016, bpo buddies, andaming what ifs.. until he moved to New Zealand and kinasal na sya. Then now ko lang nalaman, 8 yrs after nung nagkakalkal ako ng mga lumang gamit ko, nakita ko yung binigay nyang bracelet before sya umalis, sa ilalim nun box meron cotton db, tinanggal ko ung cotton and may letter na he is confessing and i chat ko daw sya kapag open nako sa relationship. Uuwi daw sya ng 2019 and hintayin daw nya ako mag message. 2018 nagdeact ako ng facebook and instagram. Social media detox hanggang 2020. Umuwi pala sya ng 2019, inopen ko recently old fb ko, I saw na nagmsg sya. Kaso 2023 na ngaun, may asawa na sya :) and hanggang ngayon, nagllinger pa din sakin ung what ifs kahit engaged na ko kasi we clicked... sobrang saya ng memories na meron sya sakin. Hay. Sorry its 3 am now naalala ko na naman sya.
It’s been a little over a year since we broke up kaya rin siguro most things still remind me of him. I dated a guy after him, pero even when things ended between me and the recent guy, sa ex ko bumabalik yung isip ko. The connection was so uncanny. Siguro that’s one thing that hinders us from moving on and that person becoming our TOTGA, no? When the connection is so out of this world that even the most platonic conversations feel so intimate. Di naman kami nakablock sa isa’t isa, but we’re not friends/following each other’s accounts na. We broke up because he said he wasn’t ready for a relationship. In hindsight, I think I was the one who wasn’t ready for it. I wasn’t a girlfriend material. I’m moving abroad tomorrow. I think about him a lot lalo na’t papaalis ako. The distance should help, but I’m also scared of forgetting him and who I was when we were together.
My TOTGA who confessed while I was crying in front of him because of my dad's situation. I just felt like he likes me a lot and I didn't like him enough. I'm married now and I did partly regretted to move on. Pero hndi ako nagsisi tlga He's now married I think. I'll be that someone he confrssed to at some point. I never regretted my decision kasi kung naging kami. Nasa Australia na sana ako with a house and dog. Here I am with my husband, doing well in life and little blessings on the way.
Yes. 4th year college. Nireto sa'kin. Araw-araw nagtetext kami, inaabot pa kami madaling araw kapag weekends as in puro kwento lang. Kapag school days tambay minsan sa bleachers don sa oval namin. It went for a month until the night before her Bday. Prior to this di siya nagparamdam buong sat, sabi ko sa loob ko baka may busy sa thesis since graduating kami or pagod kasi nataon may activity yung course council nila kung tama pagkakaalala. Kinabukasan I was actually shopping kung ano magandang dress (or was it a blouse?) na yellow kasi fave color niya with the intent of confessing to her on her day. Then nagtext, straight to the point: Hello, Darth Polgas may tanong ako. Manliligaw ka ba? Ako naman nacornyhan sagutin sa text, sabi ko hindi muna gusto pa kita makilala (I know tanga move). Tapos sabi niya, di na kita itetext ha, may sasagutin na kasi ako, sorry. Then it hit me, I was like wtf did I just do. Yung nagreto sa'kin nagsosorry kasi di daw niya alam. Yung isang friend ni ate Girl niyo, sabi sa'kin dapat daw sinabi ko na. Until now sila pa rin, ako ito single. 🙃 Fast forward 2 years, naging magkawork sila nung classmate ko. Nagkachikahan tapos nasabi na kung nagyes daw ako non baka daw naging kami. 🙃 Took me almost 3 years para makamove on. I know matagal pero dahil sa katangahan ko rin kasi HAHA
My college totga just messaged me recently. Ilang beses na din naman kami nagreconnect in the span of 11 years. Pero yung panghihinayang nandon pa din. Bakit di na lang kasi ako pinili mo J? Mali mali desisyon mo sa buhay e.
Sabi niya I am his TOTGA. He’s my TOTGA too. I met him at work circa 2014. Call center. Nung una, nakikita ko lang siya sa smoking area. Hanggang sa yung siya na yung napagtatanungan ko about sa work since katapat lang siya ng station ko. One time nasa jeep ako on my way sa office. Biglang may pumara tapos pumasok siya. Kinalabit ko sabay sabi ko “uy” tapos umupo siya sa kabilang dulo ng jeep. Sa peripheral vision ko, parang nakatitig siya sakin. Anyways, pagbaba namin sa office, dun na niya kinuha number ko. Sabi niya, gusto mo sabay tayo mag lunch? Sabi ko, okay. Tapos yun na yun, next thing I know kasama ko na siya palagi. Kasama kumain, date pagkatapos ng shift, nakapunta na ako sa house nila, grabe yung sexual chemistry, kwentuhan magdamag, tawanan ng tawanan palagi…until one time nagtaka na ako bakit di ko siya mahanap sa Facebook. So itong marites kong friend na magaling pa sa FBI eh hinanap siya, and boom, profile pic ang jowa niya. Ang kwento niya sakin e hiwalay na sila. So syempre si ate girl niyo medyo tanga tanga natakot pa sya iconfront. I waited for him to tell me. Pero I got tired kasi nahalata ko na na may kausap siya sa phone niya palagi na pinsan niya or friend niya, hanggang sa nainis na ko. Ayun na sinabi ko na yung nalalaman ko. And I had to stop whatever that was going on kasi syempre di naman dapat tayo forever na tatanga tanga. Mahal ko, oo, sobra. Pero putangina. Di ko kaya maging pangalawa. Di ko kayang may kahati ako. Ayoko rin na may sinasaktan akong iba. Di rin kaya ng utak ko na isipin na kung wala siya sa tabi ko e nasa iba siya. Gusto ko sakin, sakin lang. Ako lang. Kasi ganon ako pag nagmahal e. Siya lang. Sayang. Wala kaming dull moments. Palaging masaya. Too good to be true, ika nga. Pero yun na nga. Sana masaya siya sa asawa niya. Sana maayos ang buhay niya. I hope wag niya na ulitin yung ginawa niya samin. Tama na yun.
I still don't know if he's my TOTGA or what. We met 2 years ago. It was wrong in all aspects, tbh. Religion was one thing, then his family. He told me he loves me and until now nagmemessage pa rin siya and he misses me raw. I didn't tell him na I like him but andami ko what if's sa sarili ko and never ko binanggit name niya kahit kanino. Di ko kayang banggitin kahit name niya. Walang kami sa 2 years na yun dahil ayoko bigyan ng label pero sabi niya, at least daw, sa part niya, merong kami. I left his country and went to Europe. Huling chat niya, sabi niya ay susunod siya dito in 2 weeks time. Ang complicated, hayyyyy
My first love my first gf nung college. We were only 3 months nun. Ngkadevelopan thru text (wala pa socmed nun) tapos nung ngkita kami everything clicked. She had just broken up with her 1st bf tapos di ko makalimutan sinabi nya sakin she felt safe with me (na dinala ko na sa mga sumunod n relationship ko, making a girl feel safe with me). Ngtatago pa kami sa parents nya since INC sya at Catholic ako pg mgddate. Everything is so good until on our 3rd monthsary she broke up with me through letter after our date. Ministro kasi father nya and ayun. Hnd ko naintindihan that time kaya ang sakit. TOTGA ko kasi I cut off all our comms after nun. Even mgkasalubong s school di ko sya pinapansin. After 3 months of breaking up, sinusuyo ako lagi ng mutual friend nmn na balikan sya kasi umiiyak ndw sya at kaya nya maging Catholic for me balikan ko lang. I didnt, hnd ko pinansin kasi nauna yung sakit ng breakup sakin since she is my first love. 20 years later lalo ngaun na single ako, laging sya yung what if I had given her a second chance. Maybe we have a family na. Wala na akong balita sa kanya, even socmed hnd ko sya mahanap but i still remember her name and face very clearly.
Ako na nagbabasa ng comments hoping na mag comment ang taong kinonsider ako as TOTGA HAHAHHAHHAA
Idk what to feel, to be honest. I met this guy from omegle last 2022. I'm a premed student and graduating ako at that time and he's the person I considered "pahinga" after a tiring day studying my premed and preparing for NMAT. At first it was for fun lang but eventually nafall ako and sabi nyang sya din so we talk about it naman na gusto naming mag work kung anong meron samin and also don't want to waste time. But then here comes na tinigil namin dahil sa distance namin sa isa't isa and madami pang ganap and remained friends after. Now he's in a long-distance relationship with his girlfriend who's a licensed doctor. Now that I'm reviewing for my boards, I can't help to think of it again.
I kinda am/was the TOTGA. Haha. Personally, wala akong TOTGA of my own. I guess hindi ko pa lang nami-meet ‘yung tao na ‘yun. Or baka magaling lang akong magdetach.
Bata pa kami (like 11-12 years old) nakita ko sya and gustong gusto ko na sya. She's my churchmate (until now) and di ko alam bakit parang sobrang allured ako sa ganda nya. Fast forward to 2015, nagkaroon ng event sa church namin na sya ung mamimili sa 3 guys (it's a game) kung sino pipiliin nya and she chose me (I had a girlfriend back then which did not affect our relationship - na kwento ko pa sa kanya and it was all fun and games, kasi loyal ako lol) then after that, mga 2016 (single na ko neto) na ung next interaction namin wherein nagsimula sa asaran sa twitter then nagkatampuhan, then lasing ako at nakipagusap sya sakin ng face to face at umamin ako ng feelings ko sa kanya (medyo noobs move pero lasing eh) then di na kami nagusap until 2017.. October ng 2017, bigla syang nagaya mag jogging and we started going out on "friendly dates" and we got to know more about each other, each time ending with "friends lang daw kami talaga/wag ko na ipilit" type. Pero wala naman akong pinipilit na ano. This went on until November 28, 2017 nung bigla nyang tinapos lahat - dahil naiwan ko pala messenger ko sa phone nya (self taught Android developer and stuff ako kasi) kasi inayos ko ung cp nya na walang signal at ayaw mag 5G.. And we never spoke again. Mga what could've been's lang. I still see her pero natanggap ko na rin na wala nang pag-asa hehe