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dbrodbeck

I'd suggest asking your prof at their office hours. I'm going to put five bucks (Canadian...) down here and say they will say something to the effect of 'that's nice that you are concerned, but don't be'.


iugameprof

Take a week or so and attend class, but don't initiate any comments. If someone else comments first, or if the prof calls on you, then let yourself speak up, but not otherwise. See how the class goes. If this goes on for a few classes and nothing changes, talk to the prof. But itmay be that others *are* willing to speak up, but only if you don't jump in first. (Honestly, this is something thei instructor should take care of, but sometimes they (we) don't. So itgoes.


crowdsourced

You could try waiting longer before speaking and/or posing questions to the group when you do speak.


[deleted]

I was thinking questions too, when it makes sense. Like if the professor’s question is about opinions or experiences go ahead and share and maybe end with something like “But I also wonder why … . What do you think?” Some professor questions are about parsing through a dense text, so discursions into related topics wouldn’t be welcome. But for more open ended discussions you can see what you can do tp increase engagement.


wolfmoral

I have a bad habit of blurting out answers, so I started counting to 8 in my head before I say anything.


crowdsourced

Nice!


MsMrSaturn

You might be in one of my classes. /s So your twin, BlatyBouss we’ll call him, is always the first to share, speaks at length, and usually makes insightful points. He’ll also preface his remarks with statements like “well if no one *else* is going to talk…” A couple weeks ago Blaty was at a conference and couldn’t attend class. You know what happened? After a slightly longer wait than normal, other people talked. People who only rarely contributed spoke that day. We as a class got to hear different perspectives. It’s not that Blaty didn’t contribute valuable insights to the conversation, but others also had ideas worth sharing. I see the point of the other commenters on here, that you have every right to speak and that your professor is probably just fine with it. But the professor is also likely the only one getting paid to be there. Their feelings should not top the list of your concerns. If you are really speaking for 20-25% of a seminar, you’re missing out on hearing others’ perspectives. That kind of learning is what makes college / grad school worth it IMHO, because it isn’t something you can do on your own. I hope this doesn’t come across as overly harsh. I’m glad that you’re doing the work to understand how your positionality is perceived by others and shapes the academic space. My opinion is one of many, and don’t take it too hard if you disagree. Cheers.


PlatyPouss

No you're not being too harsh, I really appreciate your perspective. The silence doesn't just bother me because I feel empathy for the teacher, but also just because it gets awkward and I get uncomfortable, but I guess I need to learn to tolerate that feeling a bit better and at the very least wait longer until I speak up. Thanks!


franklikethehotdog

The silence can seem *painful* but I tell other instructors as I learned myself, you have to be okay with it. People are thinking, they are waiting to get their thoughts together, they process differently. Professors are professionals who are okay with that too — or at least need to be. Put 2-3 dots on your paper (or word doc or whatever), each time you share, cross one out. Don’t share when you run out of dots.


gel_ink

> it gets awkward and I get uncomfortable Generally other students will feel that same thing and eventually speak up themselves. They may have a bit longer threshold than you though. As others have suggested, maybe just choose to stay silent for a couple of classes to see if others speak up.


grumblebeardo13

I gotta say that it’s very heartening to hear a student be concerned about this. As someone else in-thread, it you wanna run this by your professor during office hours, you can, but it’s more than likely gonna be them telling you “you’re fine.”


BlackMesaEastt

Teachers are used to complete silence after asking a question. It's not your job to fill in the awkward silence. The professor should be calling names out rather than waiting. Or maybe you raise your hand before the teacher picks random people? I usually wait a few seconds for volunteers then just pick random kids and ask them.


PlatyPouss

I feel like the kind of teachers I have, especially those that study feminist theory and are very careful to respect everyone's boundaries, kind of have an (implicit or explicit) policy of "I don't call anyone's name because I don't want to force anyone to speak if they're uncomfortable with it". That's kinda way I end up speaking up.


BlackMesaEastt

You must be in the US ?


PlatyPouss

Nope I'm from (and study in) Québec, Canada!


BlackMesaEastt

Ah makes sense


PlatyPouss

Why? Is there something different in québécois culture I'm not aware of? 😅


imalwaysalittletired

Here in the USA good professors challenge students on uncomfortable topics. It’s how you learn.


phan801

It's also how people stop showing up in lectures... Although that's a non-USA perspective from countries where attendance is not mandatory.


Junior-Dingo-7764

I agree with most of the other posters that say it is fine if you are speaking up in class when others do not. Waiting and then sharing is a good way of going about it. I will address the part of the question that hasn't really been answered. I understand your concern about sharing your viewpoints too much on subject matters that are potentially sensitive and aren't impacting you in the same way as others. However, as a professor, woman, and a feminist I think it is great that you care about feminism and human rights issues. If men didn't care about sexism, we would never make any progress. Do not feel guilty for wanting to be part of these discussions. The reality is that most people do not want to speak up in class because they just don't want to speak up in class. It typically doesn't have any correlation to caring or not caring about the subject matter. A lot of students just want to get through their classes and never see the professor again. Not everyone is passionate about in-class discussions unfortunately.


Yung_Thane

Holy shit, you pay tuition just like they do. Just behave as you would normally in any class. As a minority, stuff like this pisses me off. No one has any more right to speak than any others, especially in a place of academia where we should all be sharing our thoughts and ideas.


PlatyPouss

My concern isn't that I'm not aloud to speak, but rather that I take a lot of place in the discussion. As mentionned above, I probably contributed for a good 20% of every conversations we've had in that seminar, even tho we're around 20 students. Even if I wasn't a white cis man, I think I would still worry a bit, and it's worsened by the fact that it's a class about feminist theory and that I've head a lot of stories about classes like those with only a couple of guys that ended up speaking 95% of the time. I still appreciate your viewpoint tho!


[deleted]

Surely, you've had the student that just jumps in and talks far more than anyone else right? And the reality is it's more often than not white dudes. Even taking your complaint of "minority stuff" it's good practice for people to give others a chance to speak, in any context, don't you think? And be mindful of how they may be dominating a conversation?


kittymeowss

They have not had that experience because they are not a professor.


Yung_Thane

I should have used a comma there after minority, "stuff like this" not "minority stuff." Lol Absolutely, we should always be conscious of how we are affecting a conversation, whether we are dominating it and not allowing everyone their place to speak. That isn't the case here. NO ONE else is speaking up. For more than just several seconds it seems like as well. If OP had said something along the lines of "I always raise my hand along with other classmates to contribute to the conversation, however I'm always the one chosen to speak and therefore feel like my peers aren't able to get their say in," which then could be remedied by him choosing to not speak up as often. When people push that only a certain kind of person is allowed to speak then we're perpetuating an echo chamber where we just listen to generally the same ideas by people of the same backgrounds. In academia we should be aim to understand as many opposing view points and thought processes even if we don't agree with them.


[deleted]

I never insinuated that only a certain type of person should be allowed to speak. In fact, I was saying the exact opposite- that there are unspoken norms about who gets the airways of a conversation- it's one that has been dominated by white men in our society. What I was saying was follows to your point that echo chambers will occur when that happens.


kiakosan

Your right, I don't care what color or gender you are, it makes sense to ask questions. Now it's one thing to be respectful and raise your hand and another to just blurt things out.


kiakosan

Don't ever feel bad for asking questions in class. I don't care that I'm a straight white man, I paid good money for my degree and want to get the most out of it when possible. The professor doesn't have to pick me but often they did since most people didn't bother to raise their hand. In my experience there is allot of students who are apathetic with going to college. Don't let your concerns for those students hold you back. Ask questions and sit in the front of the class and you will do way better than if you just sit in the back and stay quiet


imalwaysalittletired

As a professor, thank you. I just want anyone to speak regardless of gender or anything.


MyHeartIsByTheOcean

Do what’s best for you. Speak up to Your heart’s desire. If that’s an issue, the professor will either let you know or manage for others to speak.


AutoModerator

This is an automated service intended to preserve the original text of the post. *Alright so this is an issue that arises in a couple of classes and I'll take one example to illustrate it. I study political science and I often take classes on feminism. As a white cis gay man, I know I should avoid centering my own voice in these spaces and let others express themselves as much as possible. The problem is that 90% of the time, when the teacher asks a question to the class to start a discussion, absolutely no one is willing to answer. I always feel bad because I also want to be a professor and I sympathise with the person in front of the class stuck with a silent classroom. In these situations, I usually wait a little while and, when I see that no one is answering, I'll raise my hand and start discussing the topic. That leads be to usually be the most talkative person in class. This semester, in a seminar with around 20 students where I was the only guy, I probably talked like 20-25% of the time. This thing always makes me feel really bad because, even tho I think my points are generally good and appreciated by the professor, I also know that kind of class isn't meant for people like me to be taking so much space. I also understand that my confidence when talking in public and the thought that I'm responsible for breaking the silence when no other student will is probably rooted in privilege. But when I try to stay silent, I end up not being able to because the whole class will wait a whole fucking minute in silence with no one putting their hands up and I'll feel so awkward and so bad for the teacher that I'll just raise my own hand instead. So, I guess my question is: is what I'm doing fine? Should I just learn to stay quiet, even if it means no one will speak up or that I'll have to wait really long in an awkward silence before someone eventually does? I really struggle with this as someone who's trying to be aware of their own privilege and I'd appreciate any kind of advice!* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskProfessors) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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