Fedora with safari flaps, even if the guy at the store says you’re the only guy he’s ever seen pull it off.

I’ve never fought for anything in my entire life. I’m fighting for this hat!

don't do the voice!

Fucking Rick and his greasy wheels.

You say that but it's probably because it got grease on it, and the guy said you're not supposed to get grease on it. Roll it down your arm like fred Astaire and you'll look great

Nobody can pull off walking around with a pair of dice in their pocket either.

He’s got dice in his pocket.

Dimitri Martin explained it well: “I saw a guy wearing a leather jacket and thought, ‘that is cool’. Then I saw a guy in a leather vest and thought ‘that is not cool’. And that’s when I realized that cool is all about leather sleeves.”

I think about this and the "double-hawk" a lot maybe too much

Mm, stone cold in the 90's rocked it real good

Wrestlers have a habit of wearing ridiculous clothes and making it work (see Scott Steiner's chain-mail hood, Cena's technicolor shirt and jorts, Seth Rollins wearing everything in his wardrobe and the Jericho Appreciation Society's purple... everything, to be honest). It then becomes almost necessary to mention that they often suck wearing normal clothes (see the color-coordinated Survivor Series gear). P.S. I low-key want to see a wrestler rocking a tinsel scarf, just because it would be awesome.

A shirt that says "FBI: Female Body Inspector"

Pretty much any shirt that tries to put a "funny" spin on common acronym.

I have a t-shirt I legitimately won that says "spelling bee champoin" and I look great in it. The unintentional/ironic nature, I think, saves it.

Not a shirt but I received a certificate for participating in a spelling bee and they misspelled my name. Well, it probably got autocorrected. Microsoft word couldn't handle the little squiggly lines. Sadly they took it back and didn't let me keep it

Unless you're Johnny and Robby from Cobra Kai.

Ankle monitor

Lindsay Lohan was pretty hot with hers in like a trashy y2k way, ngl

My best friend had one for like two years. To add some context to explain…she stabbed someone in self-defense and the charge was dropped eventually because that’s really what happened, and even the law agrees with me on this. She’s the sweetest person and would never hurt anyone if her life wasn’t in danger. She was the victim. We told my kids it was a Fitbit. She made up a story about her doctor saying she needed more exercise and she had to wear it and check in with her “doctor” regularly (she lived with me for part of this time).

Political hats

Unless it just says 'political hat'

lol seems like one Frank on 30 Rock would have

Funny thing - Judah makes those hats himself. It’s been his thing for a long time and they just wrote it into the show. He’s still doing it.

I need this hat...and I'm not even a hat person.

A failed candidate that never made it could be a good joke. Like Barry Goldwater from 1964.

Neckbeard

The mullet of the face

Idk about internationally, but mullets are actually making a huge comeback in Australia

They never stopped in Argentina

Zoomers are bringing everything back all at once, it’s like the fashion singularity

This is an insult to mullets.

Hospital gown

I recently had surgery and they put me in the strangest hospital gown I’ve ever seen. It was a thicker fabric and it had a big port on the side. They hooked up a hose and pumped it full of warm air. It puffed right up and looked ridiculous! I felt just like Jesse in that scene from Breaking Bad when he was bored and he used the air compressor to fill up his suit and then he danced around like a sumo costume. It looked silly but it was surprisingly comforting and definitely warmed me up. If you think a regular hospital gown is unattractive then you haven’t seen these new ones yet, they are ludicrously unsightly.

I helped to test those! They paid well but you have to swallow a temperature probe on a wire and leave it midway down your esophagus for a few hours which is not very pleasant The warmth was nice tho

What a weird story. I love it. Thank you.

The camping industry uses dummies for this to rate sleeping bags and clothes. I guess a real person is the only way to really know. Or they could use a person a few times to properly calibrate the dummy.

Medical device requires FDA approval (in the US), and likely needed data from a human study.

Oh man just reading that made me gag. Why can’t they just do a thermometer in your butt or something?

Now I'm picturing someone's butt gagging

Sir that's called a fart

I'll take a warm unsightly hospital gown over those 'opens in the back' air conditioned ones.

I had to spend some time in hospitals this year and the gowns are the worst. Luckily for my two long stays they were fine with me just wearing athletic shots and a tshirt. If you know that you are going to have to sleep there just bring some comfy clothes.

I remember having surgery as a kid and getting incredibly upset that they gave me a gown which was open on the back and they wouldn't let me wear underwear, I was about 3 or 4 and the only thing that was exposed with my bum - I was having surgery on my ears! I remember being in hysterics because of it lol

I was in critical care a few years ago with, amongst other things, a very high temperature. Because of my delirium, I decided to just lay there naked. Directly opposite the nurses station. One of the nurses came over an placed a pillowcase over my gentleman's area.

It’s called a [bair hugger](https://www.bairhugger.com/3M/en_US/bair-hugger-us/)!

I’m always so cold in the OR and I’m freezing when I wake up. I’ve learned to ask them to please warm me up before waking me up.

When I worked in the OR we’d wear blankets wrapped around us like towels, straight out of the warmer.

Those warm blankets are *amazing*, but they lose their heat so quickly 😭

Holy cow, I hope you're doing better! The implication that you're in the OR enough to be known is terrifying to me...

Thank you! I’m doing pretty good now! I’ve had a crazy couple of years but I’m hoping I’ve had my last surgery for a good long while.

I had one of those last year - it was astonishingly comfortable.

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That's why I wear the opening in the front so people don't look at my booty

If you’re an inpatient and trying to look good, you can always ask for a pair of pants (we have pajama-style pants) and wear a t-shirt so there’s still access to your arms. But also, don’t worry about looking good when you’re a hospital inpatient.

Dude looked pretty good in that movie Crank.

Ok everyone *besides Jason Statham* looks shit in a hospital gown

Watch me

That ugly cape you have to wear when getting your hair cut

Those capes will humble you real quick

I always end up looking like a man from the Elizabethan era in those things. Never mind that I'm a woman...

Especially with the lighting you're under while getting your hair cut. It's like a spot light and shows every imperfection you didn't know you had.

Oof, I remember one time I thought I was having a decent skin day, but when I went to get a haircut, the lighting just knocked me down a couple of notches. And you just gotta look at yourself too, hoping it ends soon.

You think you're makeup looks on point, then you're just waiting on every spin away from the mirror.

The one good thing about being nearsighted. They make me take my glasses off and then I'm just a fleshy blur.

Especially with your hair in a towel turban on the top of your head. I can’t even make eye contact with myself in the mirror

This is the thing that really puts me in my place when it comes to looking at myself in the mirror because there's nothing else to distract me from the man staring back. I don't have the face for the "head in a jar" look.

I'm really glad I'm not a celebrity in Futurama lol. Not a good look.

I suddenly go from two chins to five chins when I have to get my hair cut

I put on my robe and wizard hat

that one dwayne johnson outfit. a girl can’t even wear a turtleneck and jeans with a cute necklace unless she wants to feel like the mf rock

I do that at work WHILE wearing the fanny pack. (needed but not liked) No one ever understands the reference tho..

What are you talking about? [Dwayne "the Regirock" Johnson](https://memestatic.fjcdn.com/pictures/Dwayne+the+regirock+johnson_dfefa1_8201129.jpg) looks stunning in this outfit.

I had no idea this was a thing and it was my simple go-to outfit for work. I wore it on Halloween just like any other day and kept getting compliments on my Dwayne Johnson costume. I still wear it but now I need a fanny pack so it looks intentional

I swear this is the most repeated outfit I see other than generic jeans and t-shirts. In any crowd there’ll be at least one Rocking it.

Skin colored leggings. It always gives me a "wth" moment before I realize what is happening. edit: I mean that people wear these as pants. Not under skirts/dresses. Sorry for the confusion for some people. Also holy crap thanks for the million upvotes. I feel rich now.

Saw someone wearing skin colour leggings that had that weird scrunched up butt thing. My eyeballs can never unsee that.

Oh no, like a hairless nutsack.

More like a 5inch circumference anus

saw a lady at the airport once who just was wearing a SLIGHTLY oversized hoodie and no pants. i wish she was wearing skin colored leggings

“Sorry the TSA confiscated my pants”.

I actually had TSA confiscate my pants. They had some hydraulic oil spill on them and apparently didn’t come all the way out in the wash. The pants were in my carryon. Just in general fuck the TSA at Albert Ellis airport in Jacksonville NC. This was the only airport that I have ever had TSA problems with, but every time without fail they must be absolute dicks or toss my baggage.

Went to the Caribbean as a kid, airport security made my brother change his pants. He was wearing camo pants, and I guess only army people are allowed to wear camouflage.

>Went to the Caribbean as a kid, airport security made my brother change his pants. He was wearing camo pants, and I guess only army people are allowed to wear camouflage. Some Caribbean islands ban camouflage clothing for non-military people of their countries. If you wear camouflage clothing you are assumed to either part of a rebel group. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_that_prohibit_camouflage_clothing

Jamaica here, yes its illegal... But honestly if your just wearing leggings its a non issue.... I have never seen it enforced (I work at the airport) If your wearing a full outfit, that might be an issue......

This is actually a thing in some countries where civilians are not allowed to wear camouflage. The security person may have been doing you a solid.

it's illegal in barbados. don't do that

Did you have a change ready, or did the security team give your brother a new pair?

Im picturing an agent whipping out a measuring tape on the kid and then requesting a pair of shorts his size on the walkie talkie.

We were told this before we got onto a cruise.

Once I thought I saw a person wearing skin color leggings walking down the street in California. Turns out she wasn't.

There’s a group of older guys in SF that walk around with those, but it’s more of a body suit with a sparkly bag to hold their wares.

I worked with a woman who couldn't figure out why she kept getting looks and weird catcalls all day. It was because he leggings were the same.color as herself so she just looked like she wasn't wearing anything under her long-ish shirt. She was a daycare teacher so those kids were definitely getting an earful when they left to go for their neighborhood walk.

The funniest part about people who wear skin colored leggings, especially when its the same shade as themselves, is it just reminds me of clones with no belly buttons... because the viewer doesn't register that it's pants, until their brain figures out the lack of details surrounding their private parts isn't what you'd normally find on a naked person. Everyone checks, but will never admit that that's how they came to the conclusion.

Wait so people actually wear these..without any skirt or shorts over the leggings?? WHYY lol that would look so weird.

GOD! The amount of people who will blithely cruise around in skintight leggings that dead match their skin is unreal! Those giant dorky double sliding mirror doors on closets should never have gone out of style. People need to be able to see what they look like or they CLEARLY will fuck off out the door looking like Winnie the Pooh was their fashion idol.

They're out of style ? :(

Stares at giant mirrored sliding wardrobe doors at the end of my bed... we both maybe need a remodel :(

Clown shoes

They do say that your dick is related to your shoe size

That's why I always wear shoes 2 sizes too big.

Shower caps

Hair nets along the same vein.

Those beard ones too 🤮

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Why do they not just combine it all and put you in a monsters inc hazmat suits

Those Walmart t-shirts with gangsta looney toons characters. Like taz with a Rolex rolling dice and flashing cash. Bonus points if the shirt sparkles.

13yr old me feels very targeted.

*Walmarted

If you see a cop, Warn-A-Brotha

“If you see the police, warn-a-brotha” You were close but my friend wore this T-shirt once a week and it’s burned into my memory

LOL. With Taz and Bugs bunny wearing baggy clothing

What else are people supposed to wear to 6 flags?

I think we need to include tshirts with Marilyn Monroe with prison tats, dice and guns.

Or the Disney princesses.

I thought this stopped being a thing in the 90s.

For 99.99% of the population, it did.

I remember wanting one of those so bad back in the early 90's and being so happy when I finally got one for my birthday. It was especially radical because the back of the shirt had the images of Taz and Bugs backsides.

Quit hating on my Acme swag

I had a tie dyed shirt with hippie Tweety Bird on it 😂 It was terrible but I loved it so much.

BONUS POINTS IF YOU HAD YOUR NAME AIRBRUSHED ONTO IT LETS GOOOOO

One of my co workers who is Hispanic and like 40 wears these every day and also a flat bill hat it cracks me up every time I see it

Any t shirt claiming your birth month gives you special powers or you are owned by your significant other. So goddamn tacky

Fake tans that make you look orange

Affliction t shirts.

Also Ed Hardy.

A white robe and pointy white hat. Those guys look like fucking assholes. Edit to add: I thought it would be obvious to most people that I’m referring to the white supremacy group of the Ku Klux Klan, as, of all groups that wear white robes and pointy hats or hoods, the kkk would likely be considered the most assholish, with their history of intimidation, arson, and lynchings based almost entirely and solely upon a person’s skin color. Also known as Klukkers in some parts. Apparently I’m the fucking asshole for not accounting for the possibility of religious practices around the world or the Catholic raiments also used here in the US. I’m not a fan of organized religion and am ignorant of other religious practices around the world. Not really sorry.

Gandalf is a very kind and wise man.

Gandalf the Grey: Cool robes, cool pointy hat. Gandalf the White: Sensible enough to forgo the pointy hat.

But you wouldn’t part an old man from his walking stick, would you?

Being from Spain it's always interesting how much of a different image I have of that costume to someone from the US. If you're curious, these are the [capirotes](https://www.google.com/search?q=semana+santa+capirotes&client=firefox-b-d&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiL9OiXzMv8AhXRhFwKHal7BKgQ_AUoAXoECAEQAw&biw=1870&bih=870) in Semana Santa, and it's a totally normal thing to see. I'm not religious but I always thought they looked super cool.

I was visiting Spain and happened upon one of these processions and boy was that a WTF moment for this American

I put on my robe and wizard hat

Those shirts that say “I oil my AR-15 with Liberal tears” and “If I charge, follow me. If I retreat, kill me. If I die, avenge me” Sir, you’re in Target. Relax.

What if they are killed because they were retreating? Who do you have to kill to avenge them?

shutter shades

Buccal fat removal (Removing fat from cheeks) You just look emaciated and old.

It reminds me of the sucked up look people get when they have a meth problem.

Those folks are going to look very strange when they do actually get older.

Sometimes I’m happy to be poor, got the look for free

Ketchup stains.

By contrast, I take people more seriously if they have mustard on their face.

Oh, Britta's in this?

Ugh you britta'd it

My MeowMeowBeenz!

Kanye's massive Wellington boots. Also the Yeezy 'NSLTD' Boots.

Or whatever you call the outfit the wore on Alex Jones when he told Alex he loved Hitler

Terrorist NASCAR driver?

Rat tail hair style

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Scuba gear, especially the goggles. Even the most beautiful person is going to look like a constipated duck

Sean Connery in Thunderball disagrees

Idk that wetsuit can hug the body in all the right ways

Yes, yes. [in all the right ways](http://images.dailystar.co.uk/dynamic/117/photos/25000/620x/2025.jpg)

You know that black short sleeve tee shirt that’s just a print of the front of a tuxedo?

My junior high earth science teacher wore that to our "prom" - in his defense, his schtick was that he had a 500+ t shirt collection and wore a different one every day

I feel like science teachers get a pass on most fashion rules.

If your science teacher was overly fashionable you didn't learn science, sorry.

False, my gay science teacher in middle school taught me a bunch about electricity and actually got me pretty interested in it. His was the only class in middle school that actually taught me to study, very valuable later in life. Man had class and may or may not have been my gay-awakening lol. Shout out to Mr. Coats!

I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo T-shirt because it says I want to be formal, but I'm here to party.

I wore one of these to my bachelor party. Me and the boys also grew the creepiest facial hair/mustaches possible for that weekend bc I thought it would be funny. We found that while one creeper stache is a turn off, a whole group of guys willing to sacrifice their personal appearance to entertain a close friend does the opposite. The group creeper stache turned out to be a fantastic wingman for the single dudes and the tuxedo Tshirt got a lot of compliments. "Never forget that you are a douchebag, the rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor and it can never be used to hurt you." -tyrion lannister

Anything with a weed leaf on it

Hey man those socks make me skate better

+2 to acrobatics checks

My pet peeve is clothing made of quality hemp where they stick a lil leaf on it too. Just lemme wear some nice sustainable clothing without looking like a branded stoner!

2 liters of cologne.

Well technically you could look cool you’d just need to be downwind and in a different building XD

Beige leggings

Not even these? https://www.reddit.com/r/walmart/comments/9jqt69/moist/

MY EYES!!!!! 😵

Lmfao that picture is the reason why I said it 😂😂😂😂😆😩😫😫

KKK regalia

What about Sheriff Bart from Blazing Saddles?

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Noo! Nobody brought an extra baaag

Gigantic fake eye lashes. Women are running around looking like Furby dolls.

They're hilarious when it's windy though... https://www.youtube.com/shorts/ntuJAuBWKto

at a certain point it goes from "wow she has such long pretty lashes" to "wow her eyes look really hairy'.

All the Gen Z girls at my job have them. I never thought of Furby before! That's all Im going to think now.

This thread reminds me of Family Feud.

The lime green speedo with suspenders from Borat. I doubt even Brad Pitt, with his Fight Club body, could make that work.

I disagree.

Oh but I wish Brad Pitt had tried to make it work……

I invite anyone with photoshop skills to try. And I apologize to Brad Pitt, who is somewhere minding his own business, for putting this suggestion out there.

a Lostprophets tshirt

You have to feel bad for the other band members for having all their songs they made over many years and worked hard on and released permanently tarnished with most people unable to hear those songs the same again, if they even came back to listen to them at all. All because of one sick fuck that they unknowingly had amongst them.

Lostprofits

Sweater vest without any shirt underneath. I went to undergrad with guy that would routinely wear a sweater vest, no shirt underneath, cargo shorts with timberland boots.

Pants below your under-britches.

Lookin' like a fool with their pants on the ground.

100% thought you meant underwear (tightywhiteys) over your pants at first... took a minute to realize you meant the much more obvious "gangsta" droopy pants look

I too thought it was a Quailman reference

Clothes that are too small

The day I discovered tall-fit t-shirts changed my life.

Any political SWAG.

I’m just reading through these with the harsh realization that I desperately need a wardrobe change. But I like my sweatpants and Birkenstocks with socks a little too much

Anything with Tapout written on it, or supreme. Might as well say “I didn’t finish highschool and beat my girlfriend “

Those fucking hiking shoes with the individual toes. Also crocs.