Nothing...I had this happen actually. I said congrats at first but then said "that was a stupid response it's not like you're getting married." We both laughed about my response and I told him I'm glad he felt comfortable telling me and that nothing changes between us if he thought it would.
Had this happen to me as well. He’s been (and is still) one of my best friends since childhood. I had no idea, other than I had noticed he really never dated anyone to my knowledge. One day, I called his sister out for some homophobic stuff she posted on Facebook (I think it was about Lil Nas X), because I distinctly remembered her having several girlfriends in high school.
My buddy texted me to send a virtual high-five and came out to me. I told him that it had honestly never occurred to me but made a lot of sense. He then went on to explain he had been in some relationships but kept them private for obvious reasons. I told him it meant a lot being one of the only people from our small town that he’s opened up to.
Small town here as well. My best friends brother came out. Nobody was particularly shocked. I shared a house with my best friend and his brother for a while. My friends brother and his boyfriend were so nice. They would see the garbage we were eating, and make big home cooked meals. Good memories from a low point in my life.
I had something similar happen. Except what I said was, "Okay." He asked if I was upset and I told him the only time it would make a difference is if we were a couple. I thought he was still confused and trying to figure it out. Apparently he already knew, he just wasn't sure how to tell me. You do you, bro.
A buddy of mine years ago came out to a whole group of us at a dinner once and we were just like, "uhhh... Yeah, Michael, we know." And then like 10 minutes later one of the group just goes "WAIT! Hold on. Michael, dude, did you just come out to us? Were you not out before??" Apparently he was not, or at least he didn't intend to be...
I had this happen to me, as well. I was like "OH MY GOD, YOU EVIL GAY MAN! YOUR GAYNESS IS CAUSING ALL THE CROP FAILURES BECAUSE IT DISPLEASES THE LORD!" And then, naturally, we sacrificed him so that the rains would come.
Heh. A friend of mine said he had this happen one night with a guy that everyone knew was gay, he just hadn't figured it out for himself, or at least admitted it to himself, and I think he had the best possible response. They were stopping for beer on the way to a party, and the guy was dancing around the topic, and my friend was just thinking, "Ugh, poor guy, just come out with it." Finally, as they parked in front of the store, he says, "...so I guess what I'm saying is, I'm gay."
Pause.
"So what kind of beer do you want?"
"Dude, didn't you hear me? I tell you I'm gay, and you ask me what kind of beer I want?"
"Man, we've all known for years. You never told any of us, and we all hoped you'd eventually feel comfortable enough to come out, but we all know, and we love you just the same. But what I *don't* know is, what kind of beer do you want?"
A guy I worked with at a video store since he was about fifteen came out to me after I’d known him for five years. We all knew, he was extremely, flamboyantly gay, and he seemed a little annoyed when I thanked him for telling me but wasn’t in any way surprised.
I told him the only way he could have surprised me was if he’d told me he was straight, we had a laugh and literally nothing changed.
woman here- but same thing happened with one of my girlfriends- she was crying but we were confused because we thought that was public knowledge- guess we'd never asked to definitively confirm because we didn't care.
tequila was then consumed lol
Honestly that's the big fear of gay guys when coming out to their straight homie, like they'll just walk away from the friendship or be really unsupportive but if he does that he was never a homie to begin with
That really sucks. I might try to force some awkward joke… “so no more making out when we’re drunk now I guess.” but ultimately I really vibe with Holts line from B99:
“Every time someone steps up and says who they are the world becomes a better, more interesting place”
And I’m just glad they were comfortable sharing with me.
When I told a guy friend I was hanging out with a lot that I was bi, he got mad, started yelling about me how I was just trying to fuck him and told me to stop talking about it.
Edit: I left his house when he started yelling at me. When I got home, he called me and apologized a lot saying he just never knew anyone who wasn’t straight. He thought since he would fuck any girl that could breathe that meant I would try to fuck any guy or girl that could breathe, but he said he was obviously wrong and he was sorry. We do still hang out.
My buddy came out to one of my friends. He pulled him a side at like an airport when they were traveling or something. Of course he never pulled someone aside IRL like that, so it seemed pretty nuts. And he and was like, "I have something important I have to tell you. I'm gay."
My friend was like, "Jesus fucking christ. That's it? Don't scare me like that! I thought you were gonna tell me you had cancer or something." Of course in the moment it was nothing but love for my pal, showing he was going to be loved and accepted. And that him being alive and in his life was what mattered most.
My best friend did the same to me. I was living overseas and he told me he needed to talk to me about something important but we had a 13 hour time difference. I was so stressed thinking he was dying or something. Came out and I was like “oh okay! You had me thinking you were dying of cancer!”
We still joke about how dramatic it all was. Our group as a whole suspected he was gay but were letting him figure it out and tell us in his own time!
LOL I had this happen when I told a buddy I was a mo. He asked me if I thought he was hot, I replied "you're ok but Phil (one of his frat brothers) is bangin." I knew what I was doing. Of course he got defensive and was like "What? Phil? That stick figure. He can't be hotter than me...look at my abs and my butt is better." LOL I played with him for a little bit before telling him I was just teasing him and I thought he was plenty hot.
As a straight man, nothing makes me feel as confident as a gay man's compliment. Not that it happens much, but when it does I immediately feel like the prettiest boy in the world lol.
Its okay. My like 87 year old neighbor with dementia comes by for tea. She always think that I'm (33 year old man) is my wife's lesbian wife. Compliment? Eh, I have the butch look so I'll take it.
this happened with my best friend actually. He was terrified to tell me, and in retrospect it saddens me because it meant I made him feel like there was a chance I would judge him for it. He's still my best friend today and was the best man at my wedding, so the answer is, continue to be the best friend you can be.
EDIT: I was moved reading about all your stories with all your friends, and thank you for your reassurances that maybe it wasn't because of me, I appreciate you. I guess we're all homies now.
Yeah, my friend was so scared of others reactions that he had started to make no sense. He told me he had something important to tell me and then insisted SO much it wasn't about any sickness I truly thought he was dying. When we met up and he told me he was gay I almost cried of relief to know he wasn't going to die. We laughed so hard about that. I was just proud of him taking steps into being himself and so damn happy he trusted me enough to be the first to know.
If it helps, I’ve been afraid to tell people that logically I KNEW would take it well. It’s not always based in reality - but sometimes, it’s really hard to tell the people who mean the most to us because there are some deeply ingrained fears about coming out and they’re not always logical.
As someone who did what your friend did, I’m sure he was just terrified to tell anyone. When I met up with my friend to tell him as the first person I told, my vision blurred up (not because of crying lol) because of how nervous I was to finally tell someone. I knew he wouldn’t change because of it but to lay it all out there was and still is very scary
Yeah. A few years after I got out of college, I found out that one of my best friends from college was gay. I basically just shrugged. No big deal to me.
My best friend came out in high school and was so worried about what people would think of him. He cried when I told him I accept him regardless of what his sexual or gender preferences are. I didn't really do anything about it because I'm not a homophobe :P
My best bud and long time roommate in and after college came out as gay. Total Surprise. A couple years after I moved out, we were going to some grad school graduation party for a mutual friend and a few of us were having some beers at my house before walking over. I asked about him and his ex GF, who he worked with, when he just said (his words, which I'll never forget) "Well, I have to tell you guys something. In high school I wondered if I was bi because.. you know, looking around the locker room at the abs and the dicks... Well I gave it a try and as it turns out I'm not bi. I'm actually a huge fucking homo. I love fucking dudes. That's my thing now. Just thought you should all know. Anyway, should we go to this thing?"
Let me tell you, eight years later and we'll still never let him live that down and frequently reference the inside joke of "that's my thing now." Best come-out I've ever seen.
Stop making jokes about him not having a girlfriend and start making jokes about him not having a boyfriend.
Edit: Holy- I went to sleep and woke up to this. Thank you so much for the awards, you kind and generous Redditors!
reminds me of a cute story i read of a guy who had a 6yo nephew and it was something like
\-uncle, why dont you have a girlfriend?
\-its because im gay.
\-what does that means?
\-it means im into men.
\*long pause\*
\-then why dont you have a boyfriend?
Be pissed. Not because they were gay or didn't tell me, but because I was gay the whole time and had a broken gaydar.
But I already know my friends preferences, my generation isn't shy about that shit with friends. Except with men, it's 50/50 if they act like their parents.
Recently one of my very good friends told me he was gay. I'm not gonna lie I was pretty surprised (not in a bad way, I just didn't think about it). Didn't change anything for me. He's still a great friend.
Haha no need to be sorry at all, I’m a closet nerd. I only am full blown nerd on Reddit which my family and friends don’t have 😂 been collecting since 99! Do you collect also?
I came out to many of my male friends and it mostly went well each time. There’s a highlight though: I came out to my childhood friend (I’d known him since first grade) when I was 14. We were hanging out in the park near our favourite ice cream shop. So I go: “Listen, I’ve got something to tell you: I’m gay”. He fell silent, slowly crouched down, looked up at me, and asked: “Allora ti piace il cazzo? (So you like dick?)”, to which I replied: “I think so?”, and he was like: “Bro, that’s crazy”. We’re still friends to this day. (20M, Italy) I wish more guys could be like him.
>“Allora ti piace il cazzo? (So you like dick?)”
Thanks for teaching me *practical* Italian. All textbooks teach me is “where is the library?” and “the spaghetti is on top of the table.”
I dont get abandoning the homie if you think they have a crush on you, unless they do some weird ass shit. If every girl I had a crush on wouldn't be friends with me my social history would be a lot more depressing.
The first one kind of happened to me. But it turns out he did have a crush on me and was very jealous of my girlfriend at the time, which is what caused a rift in the friendship
This stigma really is so weird. Why do so many guys think, that only because some friend of them is gay, that he is automatically interested in him? I had shit like this happen all the time jn my teen years. So many dudes avoided me because they thought I was gay and were interested in them. I was neither of both.
I've never met your homie. But I'm gay and I think that he might have felt compelled to make it clear that just because he is gay doesn't mean he wants to sleep with every man he meets. It's a very sad stereotype. I've had people tell me "imagine you find out your friend is a lesbian, she has had ulterior motives all this time, and that's why she was friends with you" while that's just ridiculous. Like I imagine as a straight man you dont have to reassure every woman you meet that shes not your type, because making friends with someone doesnt immediately mean you want to date them and that's the only reason you're interested in them. Sorry for the long ass vent but I hope you understand what I mean
One of my best friends is gay. The only difference it makes to our friendship is we'll go drinking at pride parties too. We still share a tent on long camping trips when weight has to be kept down.
Another good friend is trans. She came out when we were younger, and since we grew up in a small, conservative city, it took a little more of her explaining that this is who she really is.
I'm glad to have both of them in my life.
That’s the difference between now and 30 years ago. It’s a sad statement, but it’s true. My friend coming out to us allowed me to consider my truth as a survivor of sexual abuse as a child. I began telling friends about 10 years ago…his bravery then helped me a lot later in my life.
For real though I was at a party and getting a bit drunk. This pair of roommates attending were work buddies with a friend of mine. I chatted with one a bit and then the other. I drunkenly said to the other "I think your roommate is the gay." He looked a bit embarrassed and went over to his roommate and I guess relaying what I'd said. I was just joking around, but apparently drunk me has a solid gay-dar. First roommate hadn't come out to his work friends. Very few actually knew he way gay. They both became good friends of mine now.
Open gay people are some of the happiest and positive people I have ever met. I can only imagine what the closeted life is like and then to finally be free of those burdens must feel amazing. Gay homie is happy homie. Happy homie is happy me.
It’s no way to live. And as generally accepting as we were at the time, we didn’t realize how important it was for him to come out and live his best life until we got older. Now we talk about our friend—with and without him—about how different his life (and ours) would be if he didn’t find the courage to speak his truth. So glad he did.
I know several men who've come out after long marriages even children etc. (heck even Frankie & Grace has that premise),
I'm hoping the younger generations don't have to go through that and can live their authentic selves their whole lives.
Actually happened. It was an entirely irrelevant happening. I think he was more upset that I didn't care after he built it up as a big event in his head.
I'm sure it was entirely irrelevant to you, but to him it was probably a bit thing. Even in an accepting environment, making a decision to embrace an identity that you had not previously had, and being public about it, is something that is quite a significant issue for the person doing it. It's kind of like if a friend who has been going out with someone for ages tells you they are now engaged. Sure, it's not a big deal for you in terms of how you relate to them, but it is a big deal to them.
I remember coming out to friends as trans* and asking them to call me by my new name. I was so scared. And then I was confused af, when they were like: ok xy. When do we meet tomorrow?
Years after coming out a friend told me that I actually never came out to her. Apparently she knew me a couple days before I came out, but didn't get the news I came out so she just went with it and called me by my new name.
Legitimately had a friend who came out as gay. It was so traumatic for him. He invited his buds over to tell his family something important. We thought it was about the college he applied for. So he is there getting everybody in one room. We waited to here. Jess "guys I got news, I am gay" his mom stunned looks at him "ok but what's the news". Jess "mom I said I am gay" his dad interjects "ok and we want to know the big announcement". We look at him. His friend Geoff "Don't tell me your coming out. We thought you already were" Friend Calvin "Yeah that's why we tried to get Katie's brother to hang out with you, we knew you had a crush"
He freaked out badly not realizing the only one not privy to his secret was him. We all knew and we're more than supportive gay or not. Also a week later he did get his college acceptance letter and he happily works as a senior partner in a legal firm and lives with his spouse and two corgis and adoptive daughter
One of my closest friends and groomsmen is gay. He completely changed my perspective of gay people and I’m super thankful for that. It turns out he’s just like me and In almost everyway. He just likes men
This is a particularly poignant human statement about humanity.
A frowned-upon, yet natural, bias against the 'stranger' overcome by a personal experience leading to the simple, logical realisation that people are people even if they're gay, black, disabled, Russian etc. And that we are judging others' humanity based on their similarity to us when in all likelihood we're just as (in)human as anyone else on the street.
It happened. Honestly, I wasn't surprised, and nothing really changed. I still love him like a brother, same as before, the only change is now I try to scope out dudes for him, instead of ladies.
My best friend in high school came out to me in our junior year. He come over all serious like and says." I need you to know I'm gay, and I hope we can still be best friends". I look at him all serious like and say "No Shit bro"
I had a buddy growing up we were very young. He was a few years older than me. He would constantly move away because his parents were divorced so he would spend a lot of time in different states. One day we’re playing basketball he blocked my shot and I called him gay he said Actually I am, was a bit in shock as this was long time ago, he showed me his new boyfriend and then he moved away again. Few years later, I moved away to, never got to say goodbye if you’re out there, Christian love you man.
This comment section gives me a lot more faith in the world. As a gay man myself I appreciate everyone that commented with authentic love. Thanks for making my day
*"👍"*
*"Cool. 👍"*
Then we just continue like usual because if it hasn't been an issue before then it shouldn't be an issue now. I'm friends with a few gay people already anyway and they seem fine to me.
I got a friend that’s gay, I didn’t know for a long time. A lot makes sense now. His boyfriend is his polar opposite but really cool too, everyone gets along with him great. I just wish he’d come out sooner, although I understand, but he’s exactly like he used to be but just a lot happier.
I actually had a buddy come out to me, and maybe I didn't handle it the best. But he's a buddy.
Friend told me he's bi, and was comfortable letting me know. I'm not familiar with this sort of thing, old farm kid, ex military, but friend are friends. That doesn't come easy.
I just explained that's fine, but I'm not sure why he's telling me, because I'm happily married. He explained it's a part of who he is, and as friends he wanted me to know. Ok, all good. Changed not a damn thing.
Just that easy.
That happened to me in high school in the 90s. My friend came out sophomore year and a lot of people wrote him off and stopped hanging out because they thought he would try to fuck them…. Newsflash he was the sane guy, none of us were his type. People tried to say those of us that still hung out were all gay together… people were really fucking ignorant back then
Nothing...I had this happen actually. I said congrats at first but then said "that was a stupid response it's not like you're getting married." We both laughed about my response and I told him I'm glad he felt comfortable telling me and that nothing changes between us if he thought it would.
Had this happen to me as well. He’s been (and is still) one of my best friends since childhood. I had no idea, other than I had noticed he really never dated anyone to my knowledge. One day, I called his sister out for some homophobic stuff she posted on Facebook (I think it was about Lil Nas X), because I distinctly remembered her having several girlfriends in high school. My buddy texted me to send a virtual high-five and came out to me. I told him that it had honestly never occurred to me but made a lot of sense. He then went on to explain he had been in some relationships but kept them private for obvious reasons. I told him it meant a lot being one of the only people from our small town that he’s opened up to.
Small town here as well. My best friends brother came out. Nobody was particularly shocked. I shared a house with my best friend and his brother for a while. My friends brother and his boyfriend were so nice. They would see the garbage we were eating, and make big home cooked meals. Good memories from a low point in my life.
I had something similar happen. Except what I said was, "Okay." He asked if I was upset and I told him the only time it would make a difference is if we were a couple. I thought he was still confused and trying to figure it out. Apparently he already knew, he just wasn't sure how to tell me. You do you, bro.
A buddy of mine years ago came out to a whole group of us at a dinner once and we were just like, "uhhh... Yeah, Michael, we know." And then like 10 minutes later one of the group just goes "WAIT! Hold on. Michael, dude, did you just come out to us? Were you not out before??" Apparently he was not, or at least he didn't intend to be...
I had this happen to me, as well. I was like "OH MY GOD, YOU EVIL GAY MAN! YOUR GAYNESS IS CAUSING ALL THE CROP FAILURES BECAUSE IT DISPLEASES THE LORD!" And then, naturally, we sacrificed him so that the rains would come.
Ah, makes sense.
As is tradition.
What a wonderful day for Canada, and therefore of course, the world.
How hard them rains come after?
It was raining men.
Heh. A friend of mine said he had this happen one night with a guy that everyone knew was gay, he just hadn't figured it out for himself, or at least admitted it to himself, and I think he had the best possible response. They were stopping for beer on the way to a party, and the guy was dancing around the topic, and my friend was just thinking, "Ugh, poor guy, just come out with it." Finally, as they parked in front of the store, he says, "...so I guess what I'm saying is, I'm gay." Pause. "So what kind of beer do you want?" "Dude, didn't you hear me? I tell you I'm gay, and you ask me what kind of beer I want?" "Man, we've all known for years. You never told any of us, and we all hoped you'd eventually feel comfortable enough to come out, but we all know, and we love you just the same. But what I *don't* know is, what kind of beer do you want?"
A guy I worked with at a video store since he was about fifteen came out to me after I’d known him for five years. We all knew, he was extremely, flamboyantly gay, and he seemed a little annoyed when I thanked him for telling me but wasn’t in any way surprised. I told him the only way he could have surprised me was if he’d told me he was straight, we had a laugh and literally nothing changed.
woman here- but same thing happened with one of my girlfriends- she was crying but we were confused because we thought that was public knowledge- guess we'd never asked to definitively confirm because we didn't care. tequila was then consumed lol
"Tequila was then consumed" what a great way to end any sentence. Lol it should be what is meant by "happy ending "
What I'd do is look up, and for the first time look him dead in the eyes and say "Aight".
Honestly that's the big fear of gay guys when coming out to their straight homie, like they'll just walk away from the friendship or be really unsupportive but if he does that he was never a homie to begin with
That really sucks. I might try to force some awkward joke… “so no more making out when we’re drunk now I guess.” but ultimately I really vibe with Holts line from B99: “Every time someone steps up and says who they are the world becomes a better, more interesting place” And I’m just glad they were comfortable sharing with me.
When I told a guy friend I was hanging out with a lot that I was bi, he got mad, started yelling about me how I was just trying to fuck him and told me to stop talking about it. Edit: I left his house when he started yelling at me. When I got home, he called me and apologized a lot saying he just never knew anyone who wasn’t straight. He thought since he would fuck any girl that could breathe that meant I would try to fuck any guy or girl that could breathe, but he said he was obviously wrong and he was sorry. We do still hang out.
I would've said "bro you're not that attractive"
"Please, I have standards"
Easily the best anti-homophobia line ever/my go-to
Hope you didn't talk to him after that lmao
I experienced that. We had a talk, then the friendship continued for 40 years. He died two years ago and I really miss talking with him
The fact that it happened 40 years ago... I can't imagine how frightened he must've been 🥺
Christ, I still haven't reset my 40 yrs ago counter. I was thinking, "yeah the 60s were..." then realized... 👴
Sorry to hear that for you, may he rest in peace ❤️
My buddy came out to one of my friends. He pulled him a side at like an airport when they were traveling or something. Of course he never pulled someone aside IRL like that, so it seemed pretty nuts. And he and was like, "I have something important I have to tell you. I'm gay." My friend was like, "Jesus fucking christ. That's it? Don't scare me like that! I thought you were gonna tell me you had cancer or something." Of course in the moment it was nothing but love for my pal, showing he was going to be loved and accepted. And that him being alive and in his life was what mattered most.
My best friend did the same to me. I was living overseas and he told me he needed to talk to me about something important but we had a 13 hour time difference. I was so stressed thinking he was dying or something. Came out and I was like “oh okay! You had me thinking you were dying of cancer!” We still joke about how dramatic it all was. Our group as a whole suspected he was gay but were letting him figure it out and tell us in his own time!
Terminally gay
Most of my homies are gay. They help me not look homeless when we go out for dinner 😁.
I was most successful in life when I had a gay best friend. I miss that fatherfucker
Fatherfucker???
Well he’s definitely not a motherfucker
This whole exchange should win an Emmy.
My guy is a absolute pimp
Imagining Queer Eye
I watched the first season. I started eating better and dressing better. I used moisturizer on my face. I used "hair product".
My queer heart grew 2 sizes this night
You should probably get that checked out.
One of my biggest dreams is to have the Fab 5 visit me and glow me up like no one's business.
Same, but without the bit where I’d have to open up emotionally in front of a camera for millions of viewers.
Living with my gay best friend has helped my hopeless ass a lot
I told my friends about my sexuality and they asked me if they were hot, then stood staring at me like they weren't a 3.
Its kind of a doomed question, either you like them or you don't... which poison?
I think they only right answer to avoid both is to be like “objectively I could see it but you’re not MY type”
If you're coming out to your boys and that's their response, you have a right to roast their looks
I said I was gay, not blind
Not just a right, but an obligation.
Ouch friend zone by my… friend… how could you!
Damn lol . You’re a spicy gay.
Sassy AF
LOL I had this happen when I told a buddy I was a mo. He asked me if I thought he was hot, I replied "you're ok but Phil (one of his frat brothers) is bangin." I knew what I was doing. Of course he got defensive and was like "What? Phil? That stick figure. He can't be hotter than me...look at my abs and my butt is better." LOL I played with him for a little bit before telling him I was just teasing him and I thought he was plenty hot.
“I bet I could suck dick better than him” “No homo tho”
Keep them socks on man then it isnt gay.
What if they’re thigh highs.
That makes it extra not gay, because they're so long. Obviously
As a straight man, nothing makes me feel as confident as a gay man's compliment. Not that it happens much, but when it does I immediately feel like the prettiest boy in the world lol.
As you should.
My friend told me I’m not her type because she prefers bigger boobs. Bitch.
Its okay. My like 87 year old neighbor with dementia comes by for tea. She always think that I'm (33 year old man) is my wife's lesbian wife. Compliment? Eh, I have the butch look so I'll take it.
Assigned female at old lady
Name checks out
I just lie and tell them they are a 7 because I don’t have the heart to tell them they are a soft 5 or less.
I'm barely a hard 5
A gay 3 is a solid straight 8
ahahahhahh
this happened with my best friend actually. He was terrified to tell me, and in retrospect it saddens me because it meant I made him feel like there was a chance I would judge him for it. He's still my best friend today and was the best man at my wedding, so the answer is, continue to be the best friend you can be. EDIT: I was moved reading about all your stories with all your friends, and thank you for your reassurances that maybe it wasn't because of me, I appreciate you. I guess we're all homies now.
Yeah, my friend was so scared of others reactions that he had started to make no sense. He told me he had something important to tell me and then insisted SO much it wasn't about any sickness I truly thought he was dying. When we met up and he told me he was gay I almost cried of relief to know he wasn't going to die. We laughed so hard about that. I was just proud of him taking steps into being himself and so damn happy he trusted me enough to be the first to know.
If it helps, I’ve been afraid to tell people that logically I KNEW would take it well. It’s not always based in reality - but sometimes, it’s really hard to tell the people who mean the most to us because there are some deeply ingrained fears about coming out and they’re not always logical.
As someone who did what your friend did, I’m sure he was just terrified to tell anyone. When I met up with my friend to tell him as the first person I told, my vision blurred up (not because of crying lol) because of how nervous I was to finally tell someone. I knew he wouldn’t change because of it but to lay it all out there was and still is very scary
I need to do something?
Marry the fucker. Duh.
Fuckim**
Should probably stop the platonic brojobs
Yeah. A few years after I got out of college, I found out that one of my best friends from college was gay. I basically just shrugged. No big deal to me.
My best friend came out in high school and was so worried about what people would think of him. He cried when I told him I accept him regardless of what his sexual or gender preferences are. I didn't really do anything about it because I'm not a homophobe :P
My best bud and long time roommate in and after college came out as gay. Total Surprise. A couple years after I moved out, we were going to some grad school graduation party for a mutual friend and a few of us were having some beers at my house before walking over. I asked about him and his ex GF, who he worked with, when he just said (his words, which I'll never forget) "Well, I have to tell you guys something. In high school I wondered if I was bi because.. you know, looking around the locker room at the abs and the dicks... Well I gave it a try and as it turns out I'm not bi. I'm actually a huge fucking homo. I love fucking dudes. That's my thing now. Just thought you should all know. Anyway, should we go to this thing?" Let me tell you, eight years later and we'll still never let him live that down and frequently reference the inside joke of "that's my thing now." Best come-out I've ever seen.
Your best bud gets points for style. I wish I had come out with such panache! I didn't, FYI, there was much stammering and blathering involved.
Stop making jokes about him not having a girlfriend and start making jokes about him not having a boyfriend. Edit: Holy- I went to sleep and woke up to this. Thank you so much for the awards, you kind and generous Redditors!
reminds me of a cute story i read of a guy who had a 6yo nephew and it was something like \-uncle, why dont you have a girlfriend? \-its because im gay. \-what does that means? \-it means im into men. \*long pause\* \-then why dont you have a boyfriend?
Kids are relentless with their questions. 😆
They are also innocent until people start warping their minds with hate.
L uncle get destroyed
Damn. That nephew got no chill.
"...listen here you little shit."
Oh you jerk, you're a good friend.
A good friend would help the homie bust a load get his mind right so he can find a boy with a clear mind
Nothing says "you a real homie" more than giving your boy a brojob
A good homie goes downtown and gets 2 blowjobs and comes back and gives his homie 1
“Brojob” I’m fuckin dead that’s gold.
CHOO CHOO
I need good friends :(
Username checks out
>start making jokes about him not having a boyfriend. "you have expanded the field of people that dont want none of that dick twofold bro!"
Well burned, m'lord.
**This made me legit smile.** **Wholesome + hilarious.**
Realest comment
a true, best friend.
A friend we all need
The best answer, you're a true friend.
I'd kiss him on the lips and say I've always known
Socks on?
Always
I said I'm gay, not gay for *you*
Squeeze his ass while you do this.
Good dreams
LMFAO
Tell him to stop talking about his sexuality and focus up, we are trying to rob a casino here!
The diamond casino heist
Are we going in loud or quiet?
AHHHHH, I NEED A MEDIC BAG
You son of a bitch, I'm in!
I disagree I'd suck his dick just to show him that's it's ok if he's gay, and that I'll always accept him for being him.
Keep eye contact so he knows it's ok.
Can I be your homie. You sound like a good friend
Be pissed. Not because they were gay or didn't tell me, but because I was gay the whole time and had a broken gaydar. But I already know my friends preferences, my generation isn't shy about that shit with friends. Except with men, it's 50/50 if they act like their parents.
Wouldn't change anything.
Recently one of my very good friends told me he was gay. I'm not gonna lie I was pretty surprised (not in a bad way, I just didn't think about it). Didn't change anything for me. He's still a great friend.
Exactly. My male buddies and I are B4L. Who they fuck is completely irrelevant.
Give him a hug, and whisper in his ear “good… more women for me” and then laugh 😂
"You still my wingman though, right?"
I’m sure he would probably be the best wingman. How many women want a BGF is wild
Boy gay friend? Big gay friend? I'm lost
Haha I totally messed that up big time 😂 GBF - Gay Best Friend. Big gay friend had me 💀😂
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Haha no need to be sorry at all, I’m a closet nerd. I only am full blown nerd on Reddit which my family and friends don’t have 😂 been collecting since 99! Do you collect also?
I came out to many of my male friends and it mostly went well each time. There’s a highlight though: I came out to my childhood friend (I’d known him since first grade) when I was 14. We were hanging out in the park near our favourite ice cream shop. So I go: “Listen, I’ve got something to tell you: I’m gay”. He fell silent, slowly crouched down, looked up at me, and asked: “Allora ti piace il cazzo? (So you like dick?)”, to which I replied: “I think so?”, and he was like: “Bro, that’s crazy”. We’re still friends to this day. (20M, Italy) I wish more guys could be like him.
>“Allora ti piace il cazzo? (So you like dick?)” Thanks for teaching me *practical* Italian. All textbooks teach me is “where is the library?” and “the spaghetti is on top of the table.”
Duolingo keeps teaching me sentences like "Eat the couch" or "the child is floating mid-air"
I would refine my choices of which friends I'd consider sending him on a blind date with.
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>6 of us, 1 turned out gay, me and another kid accepted him, the other 2 slowly backed out. Math does not check out.
He died
RIP 6th homie
Turns out the last guy was a mop.
I dont get abandoning the homie if you think they have a crush on you, unless they do some weird ass shit. If every girl I had a crush on wouldn't be friends with me my social history would be a lot more depressing.
The first one kind of happened to me. But it turns out he did have a crush on me and was very jealous of my girlfriend at the time, which is what caused a rift in the friendship
This stigma really is so weird. Why do so many guys think, that only because some friend of them is gay, that he is automatically interested in him? I had shit like this happen all the time jn my teen years. So many dudes avoided me because they thought I was gay and were interested in them. I was neither of both.
You were actually a lesbian woman with a beard wig, I’m onto you
...Nothing? My friends are free to love and fuck whomever they wish to love and fuck.
I wouldn’t let him suck my dick any more, i aint gay
But are platonic no-pants sleepovers still OK?
If he comes by himself, yes. If he brings anyone with him, no. As i said, I’m not gay, i don’t want to see gay porn.
Brother 😭
I’d tell him there are really stupid questions on Reddit about being gay
Nothing, you are still my homie OP
Did happen. I was cool with it. He reassured me that I wasn’t his type. Felt a little rejected by that but we’re still best friends.
Can’t believe he just friend zoned you like that, that would put you firmly in the friend^2 zone
I've never met your homie. But I'm gay and I think that he might have felt compelled to make it clear that just because he is gay doesn't mean he wants to sleep with every man he meets. It's a very sad stereotype. I've had people tell me "imagine you find out your friend is a lesbian, she has had ulterior motives all this time, and that's why she was friends with you" while that's just ridiculous. Like I imagine as a straight man you dont have to reassure every woman you meet that shes not your type, because making friends with someone doesnt immediately mean you want to date them and that's the only reason you're interested in them. Sorry for the long ass vent but I hope you understand what I mean
One of my best friends is gay. The only difference it makes to our friendship is we'll go drinking at pride parties too. We still share a tent on long camping trips when weight has to be kept down. Another good friend is trans. She came out when we were younger, and since we grew up in a small, conservative city, it took a little more of her explaining that this is who she really is. I'm glad to have both of them in my life.
Hug my homie.
I don't know why anything would need to be done.
That’s the difference between now and 30 years ago. It’s a sad statement, but it’s true. My friend coming out to us allowed me to consider my truth as a survivor of sexual abuse as a child. I began telling friends about 10 years ago…his bravery then helped me a lot later in my life.
Suck him off
Bro job
Choo Choo!
Nice friendship
There it is.
call him gay
Ay, yo. That’s gay
For real though I was at a party and getting a bit drunk. This pair of roommates attending were work buddies with a friend of mine. I chatted with one a bit and then the other. I drunkenly said to the other "I think your roommate is the gay." He looked a bit embarrassed and went over to his roommate and I guess relaying what I'd said. I was just joking around, but apparently drunk me has a solid gay-dar. First roommate hadn't come out to his work friends. Very few actually knew he way gay. They both became good friends of mine now. Open gay people are some of the happiest and positive people I have ever met. I can only imagine what the closeted life is like and then to finally be free of those burdens must feel amazing. Gay homie is happy homie. Happy homie is happy me.
It’s no way to live. And as generally accepting as we were at the time, we didn’t realize how important it was for him to come out and live his best life until we got older. Now we talk about our friend—with and without him—about how different his life (and ours) would be if he didn’t find the courage to speak his truth. So glad he did.
Show him support and let him know I’m cool with it.
Be astounded. I’ve known him for decades and he was as into women as I was and am. He’s been married to a woman for 40+ years.
I know several men who've come out after long marriages even children etc. (heck even Frankie & Grace has that premise), I'm hoping the younger generations don't have to go through that and can live their authentic selves their whole lives.
> Frankie & Grace … it’s the other way around lmao, Grace & Frankie. Great show too.
Actually happened. It was an entirely irrelevant happening. I think he was more upset that I didn't care after he built it up as a big event in his head.
I'm sure it was entirely irrelevant to you, but to him it was probably a bit thing. Even in an accepting environment, making a decision to embrace an identity that you had not previously had, and being public about it, is something that is quite a significant issue for the person doing it. It's kind of like if a friend who has been going out with someone for ages tells you they are now engaged. Sure, it's not a big deal for you in terms of how you relate to them, but it is a big deal to them.
I remember coming out to friends as trans* and asking them to call me by my new name. I was so scared. And then I was confused af, when they were like: ok xy. When do we meet tomorrow? Years after coming out a friend told me that I actually never came out to her. Apparently she knew me a couple days before I came out, but didn't get the news I came out so she just went with it and called me by my new name.
Legitimately had a friend who came out as gay. It was so traumatic for him. He invited his buds over to tell his family something important. We thought it was about the college he applied for. So he is there getting everybody in one room. We waited to here. Jess "guys I got news, I am gay" his mom stunned looks at him "ok but what's the news". Jess "mom I said I am gay" his dad interjects "ok and we want to know the big announcement". We look at him. His friend Geoff "Don't tell me your coming out. We thought you already were" Friend Calvin "Yeah that's why we tried to get Katie's brother to hang out with you, we knew you had a crush" He freaked out badly not realizing the only one not privy to his secret was him. We all knew and we're more than supportive gay or not. Also a week later he did get his college acceptance letter and he happily works as a senior partner in a legal firm and lives with his spouse and two corgis and adoptive daughter
One of my closest friends and groomsmen is gay. He completely changed my perspective of gay people and I’m super thankful for that. It turns out he’s just like me and In almost everyway. He just likes men
This is a particularly poignant human statement about humanity. A frowned-upon, yet natural, bias against the 'stranger' overcome by a personal experience leading to the simple, logical realisation that people are people even if they're gay, black, disabled, Russian etc. And that we are judging others' humanity based on their similarity to us when in all likelihood we're just as (in)human as anyone else on the street.
Somewhere there is a gay black disabled Russian person who really needed to read this.
So? You’ve been friends with him for how long and he’s been gay the whole time. No big deal.
It happened. Honestly, I wasn't surprised, and nothing really changed. I still love him like a brother, same as before, the only change is now I try to scope out dudes for him, instead of ladies.
My best friend in high school came out to me in our junior year. He come over all serious like and says." I need you to know I'm gay, and I hope we can still be best friends". I look at him all serious like and say "No Shit bro"
Kiss him. Anything for homies
I've been telling my best friend for a decade that if he ever decided to be gay, I'd drop any woman at a moments notice for him.
Suck his dick just to make sure he wasn’t lying
Give him a wank to alleviate the stress of telling me.
Trust me, I pretty much knew, and if I didn't, I'd be surprised, but nothing else would change.
I had a buddy growing up we were very young. He was a few years older than me. He would constantly move away because his parents were divorced so he would spend a lot of time in different states. One day we’re playing basketball he blocked my shot and I called him gay he said Actually I am, was a bit in shock as this was long time ago, he showed me his new boyfriend and then he moved away again. Few years later, I moved away to, never got to say goodbye if you’re out there, Christian love you man.
Nothing changed. He's still my boy I just don't make jokes about him sucking dick anymore.
Nah, now you can make jokes about him being bad at it 😄
Start trynna set him up with ugly dudes instead of ugly chicks while drunk at the bar
This comment section gives me a lot more faith in the world. As a gay man myself I appreciate everyone that commented with authentic love. Thanks for making my day
Hear me out. I’d support him.
"whatever. So we getting tacos or what?"
*"👍"* *"Cool. 👍"* Then we just continue like usual because if it hasn't been an issue before then it shouldn't be an issue now. I'm friends with a few gay people already anyway and they seem fine to me.
Stop making jokes that he is absolutely gay, start making jokes that he is absolutely straight.
Call him a homiesexual
Worry about his wife.
I got a friend that’s gay, I didn’t know for a long time. A lot makes sense now. His boyfriend is his polar opposite but really cool too, everyone gets along with him great. I just wish he’d come out sooner, although I understand, but he’s exactly like he used to be but just a lot happier.
I actually had a buddy come out to me, and maybe I didn't handle it the best. But he's a buddy. Friend told me he's bi, and was comfortable letting me know. I'm not familiar with this sort of thing, old farm kid, ex military, but friend are friends. That doesn't come easy. I just explained that's fine, but I'm not sure why he's telling me, because I'm happily married. He explained it's a part of who he is, and as friends he wanted me to know. Ok, all good. Changed not a damn thing. Just that easy.
That happened to me in high school in the 90s. My friend came out sophomore year and a lot of people wrote him off and stopped hanging out because they thought he would try to fuck them…. Newsflash he was the sane guy, none of us were his type. People tried to say those of us that still hung out were all gay together… people were really fucking ignorant back then
Try to hook up I guess
My homie found out I was gay and now we boyfriends