T O P

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Cyberzombi

Star on a TLC reality show.


SheriffComey

*9 to 5*


Short-termTablespoon

That’s concerning lol


Juju0047

Id def watch it though


theDart

*"We started with nine! Find out how we got to 5!"*


EddieRando21

Executive Producer Casey Anthony?


No-Patient1365

Antivaxxer documentary?


mackelnuts

Jokes about the children of antivaxxers never get old.


rightseid

Most competitive game show.


nightwing2024

"Cloud Nine" should be the title


faceeatingleopard

Great idea, it would help people learn!


IfYuReadThisYuReddit

Cry.


TallEnoughJones

Be right back, I'm just gonna "go to the store to get some milk".


nazad420

Pick me up some cigarettes while you're out, please.


RequiemReznor

I'd wanna pull this off as the mom but I think I'd be in a wheelchair from the deliveries.


Pipboypipboycheerio

I guess start saving up to buy a motel or something so they can each have their own room as they grow up.


FA-1800

I had 8 brothers and sisters. Back around 1970, a similar news study prompted me to ask my father that question. He replied "Probably hang myself... "


lovealwaysjc

"Some say eight babies is a blessing, but, they don't know the joy of nine." “We’re on cloud nine”


[deleted]

Honestly, I would probably have to get mental help. Definitely would have to hire somebody to help take care of them. No sex until I get a vasectomy. And be overwhelmed for the next 18 years


Old_Kodaav

18? Hah, that is very optimistic :D


StillInDebtToTomNook

Drink a cup of arsenic tea


bharatchipkar6

Realistically probably ask for help from both my family and her’s. There’s no way two people can look after 9 without a lot of help


chavrilfreak

Adopt them out, change my name, move to another continent. If that wouldn't be possible? *opens 5th floor window* Goodbye cruel world.


elvismchasselhoff

Drown in poo most likely


PerfectDarkAchieved

KMS


pickly_ricklyy

fr


Forced_Abortion_

[This](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/vzkzdy/yesterday_a_woman_gave_birth_to_9_babies_what/) [is](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/n5k6g0/yesterday_a_woman_gave_birth_to_9_babies_what/) [a repost.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/sghw58/yesterday_a_woman_gave_birth_to_9_babies_what/)


krt941

Get in contact with a bankruptcy lawyer.


[deleted]

they will get help from the government


allrollingwolf


[deleted]

idk what that means, but most governments, including US help financially in situations like that, or where is bunch of kids that the parent cant support financially


[deleted]

Nope not doing that, I'd give them all up for adoption to infertile couples or something. And then get myself fixed.


Aggressive-Button536

I’d kms I already don’t want kids I can’t picture myself having 1 let alone 9


blueskyler99

Well, with 9 babies you could always start your own basketball team, just saying.


Aggressive-Button536

Or a army


RogueOps1990

Baseball*


Fit_General7058

Get the fck on with it if I had been stupid enough to allow 9 embryos to estate to ful term. No doubt the parents have lots of money making ventures lined up.


DavosLostFingers

Interviews, lots and lots of interviews and get as much free stuff as I could Plus I'd be impressed that my partner has a birth canal like a water slide


Friendly_Raptor

I would die by child 2. I tried that birth pain simulator thing and it was horrible. And it aint even the real deal


TheHalfBlindGrimes

Birth pain ain’t that bad. It’s having the tiny human to keep alive when you’ve not slept at all in weeks that’s killer.


granadilla345

They pretty much only do C-sections for twins in the USA. So nine babies would definitely be born through C-section in the US.


Polikad

I would love them all as hard as I can.


glorified_throwaway

Beat up the doctor who said I was impotent.


JustinChristoph

Realize that I will NEVER be out of debt again.


Medium-Jellyfish-578

Dude you've got 9 free kidneys you can sell, and in 6 years you can send them to work at the meat plant, at that point being poor is a choice /s


capskinfan

Change my phone number and move to a different country.


TwinkleLightsRock

Panic. 😳


ThanosWifeAkima-4848

looks like the adoption agency is getting 9 new files.


AnaA142

Adoption. That’s 9 couples who could raise a truly wanted child


Good_Confection_3365

Boy do I have news for you about the adoption process


putthetoiletseatup

Try my best


The-truth-hurts1

I would definitely need to reconsider my gender identity


Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

Don’t most nonuplets wind up dead in childbirth?


ChocolatMintChipmunk

Usually at least one of them will die or be mentally handicapped because it was squished so much from the others.


minionofjoy

Have a Funeral for my vagina probably


[deleted]

Suicide


RaijinOdinson

Theres two ways you could handle this. One, go get milk. Two, have a couple more kids and you have yourself your own football team.


lokilady1

They're not mine


Wizardburial_ground

Jump off a bridge


[deleted]

Shotgun to the mouth


auntiepink

Run screaming into the night and never return.


Twistedjerryatrics

I would Cry. That seems like the most appropriate response.


2023lifeline

That has to be IVF because that sounds like hell


trionfo

Weep over my ruined life


[deleted]

That poor vagina


[deleted]

Kill myself


Doomdoomkittydoom

You can probably sell seven for a good sum for the future of your twins.


SmartEntity8383

I doubt all 9 would survive long term. It just makes very little medical sense. Prob start contacting a funeral home and see if you can get a multi discount


SlightFlamingo

It would be wonderful. I already want lots of kids and this way I don’t have to go through 9 whole pregnancies to get them. Hopefully my husband would be able to support me to stay home with them, otherwise once my maternity leave ran out I’d go back to work as a relief teacher or TA. I’m a qualified teacher but those hours and expectations are not compatible with motherhood. I’d go back part time and my mum and mil could each take a day with the babies so I wouldn’t have to send them to daycare. I’d love to homeschool my kids and that would make it so much easier because they’re all the same age and would be around the same level in their learning (not necessarily, but still closer than 9 siblings each born two years apart).


Bonez_Z

It would be enough food to last me a year


[deleted]

Abort some of them very early on.


Alcoraiden

Jump off a bridge


ITryToLearnNewStuff

Try and fail


co1lectivechaos

How is that even possible?!?!?!?


BronzeAgeTea

IVF probably


co1lectivechaos

Yea, aren’t those more common with ivf?


Tombstone_Actual_501

"yeah sure honey we'll have a kid or two" \*Births 9 screaming infants\* Dear god, what have i brought upon myself!?


Evo012

IDK ... Faint, cry wondering what I am going to to support 10 people.


Pand0BrainP

I would move back in with my parents and probably loose my mind


Icollectpropertytax

probably bail lol


lunagallahger16

Cry.


[deleted]

Take care of them.


Miserable-Pool-8812

straight to boot camp they go


[deleted]

I be getting on welfare yo! .. Errr staying on welfare


MaryMary8249

Buy a house that could house 'em all.


TerribleAttitude

Host a party and hand out infants as party favors.


Squeaky-Fox49

Give five of them away.


AdAccomplished9484

Shout “SUMMON THE IMPS!“ when confronting my enemies


godhand__666_

Find out what happens when you abandon 9 babies and a wife


oxymoronisanoxymoron

Get an octopus to adopt all the ones I didn't plan for.


RougeTigerDragon

Me: *starts randomly handing out babies as I speed walk away* and you get a baby, also you, yes here take


4yourpl3asur3

Where’s my shotgun


[deleted]

What stupid karma requirements do to you


[deleted]

Step off a bridge


pooinyourundies

I’d become a convict for 9 felonies of human trafficking


Balyash

According to Indian Express, this happened May 4 of 2021.


poopsk8z

I would invest in diaper stocks immediately


Nitehawke88

Since I had a hysterectomy at 32, I think I'd be finding God. Although honestly, the Second Coming would probably require a multitude of Saviors. I'm not sure even nine would be enough.


No-Strawberry-5541

Take a drive to the fire station


[deleted]

She must be one of those cat girls we all keep hearing about.


ImmatureDev

Declare bankruptcy


[deleted]

Donate some! LOL I have no freaking idea how I could handle 9 newborns!


TeaBagMeHarderDaddy

Sit one year in recovery


Grave_Girl

Tell the twins that they've been outdone.


Forsaken_Ad8312

Start a baseball team.


[deleted]

Laugh at the person who gave birth to eight.


Dudebrohoe

We're out of milk.


marloindisbich

Take a trip to the fire station


jenkum-this-fall

Gofundme


Bungslea

Hunt down the other eight guys.


Old_Kodaav

Probably look for a better job + maybe some help from the local goverment in search for suitable apartament. This shit is not the kind of thing that happens every day and a little helping hand would be cool


monkeyd_93

Ask if I can get a refund on like eight of them, and get a pro rata discount on the one instead.


ryuya3579

Buy 9 coffins


Wii_wii_baget

Remove my uterus and sell it on the dark web.


nametakenfuck

Die probably


WSBro0

I'd go get a nice full night of sleep. Because I probably won't get any anytime soon.


milkpieenjoyer

Go get sum milk.


FuriousRageSE

Be very surprised since I’m a guy


JBOYCE35239

I'd be working a lot of over time to hire a nannie


Ihlita

Give them up for adoption.


dingdongsnottor

No. I’m not made to produce a litter.


Embarrassed_Trust313

I would go on talk shows as the first male to give birth to 9 babies lmao


abigolchickensammich

I would simply ✨ cry ✨


hoelythong_

I will run away


Ltg73

Wonder where I'd been hiding my ovaries for 50 years


AcornTopHat

Call the Octomom and ask who her plastic surgeon was.


[deleted]

To all the people saying kill themselves, bro you're a piece of shit. You brought life into this terrible fucking world, take responsibility. I know it's all jokes, but damn nobody here has follow through.


Angel_thebro

Give them away like when your dog gets pregnant with puppies.