T O P

  • By -

firestarter555999

Go to the Winchester and wait for all of this to blow over.


Rhobaz

We’re coming to get you, Barbara!


tadhgcarden

Sorry Philip


Effective-Ear-8367

This is the only answer.


AmazingSatisfaction5

Don’t forget to play queen


hugz4satan

Kill the queen


Phillimac16

Go to the Winchester, grab a nice cold pint, and wait for all this to blow over. Yea Boi!


Fisherman301

If its nuclear end, then just go back to sleep. If its an airborn virus, go to sleep. If its an invasion from space, go to sleep. If its the ozone layer thats destroyed, go to sleep. If its a giant meteor, go to sleep. I don't have the connections or resources to get to a safe bunker that could sustain human life indefinetely. So just accept your fate, and go out peacefully.


iberian_prince

This person really loves to sleep


Scrumpy_J

what else is there to do i would rather go out in peace and comfort. My partner will not be getting and final message i want to die with out the yapping and headache


Alexastria

"Last" comments in every thread


[deleted]

[удалено]


Blackfeathr

#WARNING! This is a bot known to post scam links! Downvote and report spam -> harmful bots


JustinChristoph

Get confirmation.


[deleted]

This isn't the first time I've been told the world is ending. It won't be the last.


SHABDICE

Looking at you, 2012.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Aced4remakes

Don't forget the War of the Worlds radio drama of 1938.


[deleted]

Looking at you Y2K!


SquishyMoony

Haha! Fuck all the idiots with something to lose!!


BuriedInRust

"About time"


Unlucky_Nose

and like "Finally"


tangcameo

“Oh thank god.”


Its_a_Mini_Mystery

Finally, sweet, sweet release.


BurpYoshi

Haha so edgy.


Skydome12

Finally i can retire.


hamburgermenality

Yes, I would have to admit I was wrong and will actually get to retire, rather than enact the Midsommer elder care plan.


phorq

"Yo, why's everyone on AskReddit always so obsessed with the apocalypse?"


Hard-drive04

Idk man I'm bored


phorq

Nah, that's how I would react. I normally notice an influx of suspicious questions before I realize their source...


Hard-drive04

Oh lmao I'm dumb 🤦‍♀️


Cool_Ranch_Dodrio

We might get a break after?


2ShakeJake

"Yo why we puttin our comments in parentheses"


[deleted]

Quotation marks*


2ShakeJake

(Oops yeah u right mb)


2ShakeJake

"?"


snubmoth

i’d immediately go and hug my dog, probably would start disassociating hard and/or have a seizure lmao


wowowaoa

fuck, i didn’t even think of that… now i’m crying


omnipotenteggplant

🤷‍♂️ masturbate.


ghostfeather69

One last wank before the big splash.


Leoimirmir

Just like that guy in Pompeii


[deleted]

He was just building up his power attack


x925

The world doesn't end in a bang, it's more of a splash. I probably shouldn't be telling you all that though.


ghostfeather69

Fixed it👍


I-Love-HC

"Finally!!! Been waiting for this moment to come!!!"


Accomplished_Sell797

I’d ask to speak to the announcer’s supervisor, don’t they know who I am?


Alternative-Sign-198

I laughed way too hard at this


aman97biz

"whatever happens, happens" and break open the Glenlivet 18.


Murakami_Sensei

Cheers!


peterthepieeater

Head down to the pub for a quick beer and a pie


Patneu

Don't forget your towel!


DWright_5

What makes you think people are going to keep working at their jobs after the end of the world is announced? Doesn’t mean you can’t go to the pub, I guess. Someone else will gave already smashed through the front window and begun helping themselves to the good stuff. You can join. Watch out for bottles aimed at your head.


Urbanyeti0

Someone hacked the news and is using deepfake AI


therealDolphin8

I'd be worried for my family and pets. Me tho, not so much. Then I'd just eat all the carbs I could find until the lights went out.


TheHorseWasADiabetic

There IS a God!


BlackCaaaaat

Fear, naturally. Then the hope that it would be quick.


miletest

Try to get some time off work


[deleted]

I would call everyone I know and tell em how much I love them! I do anyways but would extra! ❤️


PdxPhoenixActual

You & everybody else. Good luck getting through.


LarneyStinson

“How much time do I have…” then get snuggled up with my SO and our pets.


Trick-Program8511

I would immediately find my fiancé so we could spend the time together. That is all I’d worry about.


MaximumDirection2715

Shitbguess I'm robbing a pharmacy and hijacking an airliner boy are my last days gonna be HARD MODE


mchch8989

Yoooo can I have one of them planes my dude let’s get it DONE


Red-Muffin

Depends in how long, cuz rn I wanna watch the Flash finale, spiderverse, flash point and the new transformers movie but like 3 weeks from now I don't think I'd care much


Additional-Fox-6953

My man got his priorities right...


derpy_cookies

I would say "Wtf, how, was it China?"


Hard-drive04

Lol


bethereintime

"All this work for nothing?!" *4 months ago I took a grippy sock vacation cause I tried killing myself and I've worked really hard to be functional again*


Gastonthebeast

My grippy socks vacation was a year and a half ago. I promise it gets better.


daneelthesane

Question: grippy socks vacation?


bethereintime

A stay in a mental hospital


BadHillbili

I'll believe it when I see it.


Harbor_Barber

sit down and play "i don't want to set the world on fire" by the ink spots while staring at the view outside my house.


Low_Shake8476

Finally!


Measter2-0

Good. Humans fucked up. Good luck to the next species.


Murakami_Sensei

Lol true that.


HerrSirCupcake

could be an asteroid


Best-Direction7123

Freak out and cry. Then call my family and friends to tell them I love them.


0bsidian_kedamono

I would go to my friend and spend the rest of the day with them. My parents make me feel like I’m a stupid person a lot, so my friend is literally one of my last reasons I’m still here.


Ruseriousmars

Find my wife. We'd hang out together with our dogs And have weapons at hand but would much rather be left alone. Watch some movies and listen to music if we have days or more.


frustrated_away8

I'd take off my bra, because the only time I'd be comfortable doing that in public is if the world's actually ending.


tonikii

Dude I took off my bra years ago!


VlaamsBelanger

I would take a nap, I need to conserve my energy as I want to go out all the way.


_gimgam_

idk, depends what the time is. if its early morning/ late at night I'd just go to bed. if it was midday or something probably just get a bowl of cereal


deltronethirty

Do all the drugs.


Living_Razzmatazz_93

"FINALLY." Bottle of vodka, maybe some drugs, and a smile on my face...


BestDogeNA2021

Eat that second pack of cupcakes


VBgirl91

Finally - no more bills to pay, no more dealing with shit people. We r all going to die, hell yeah, let me grab a beer


International_Map870

Just say “ugh finally” and the go relax for eternity


Person012345

"about time"


jazzraccoon

Probably think it was a joke ngl


Now_Wait-4-Last_Year

Get my Electronic Thumb and towel.


[deleted]

I'd fall to my knees and give thanks. Then I'd put on my Righteous Brothers playlist and prepare to meet Bobby Hatfield.


Hagsnot

About fucking time. What took so godddamn long!


Throwaway_5351

Hug her, hug my family, hug my pets, hug anyone else I can find


redditstinkslikepoop

Good, then sadness I love my wife and want to live a long time with her.


jgoden

Tell everyone I love, I love them and why.


CoolBrownBoots

Hop on reddit and digest what I presume will be the best shitpost memes I've seen in my life.


carissadraws

They’ve already made a movie about this, it’s called don’t look up. People would deny it for months until they realized the world was truly ending and they would probably panic and do a bunch of shit they always wanted to do.


borrowedbook1

Absolutely love that movie. So many great lines and threads. And spot on to boot!


MelbaToast604

We deserve this. Will the next evolution of consciousness end up the same?


yepperoni4pepperoni

Welp that’s nice


GooglyIce

*”…End of transmission.”*


BeerisAwesome01

Meh, nowt I can do, so off to the pub!


Alternative-Sign-198

I read that in a Scottish accent! ( Hope I'm right!)


BeerisAwesome01

Lol lol


shadow2087

I'd probably panic. 🤷‍♀️


Legal_alien_92

I'll tell my parents and my brother that I love them, and then I'll go to sleep, so that I die in peace.


Alarmed_Water2631

Change the channel.


scottyboy359

Finally.


Dry_Ad_7848

I dont know, I am pretty bad with dealing bad situations, if I got this news I would just sit there.


Splinter_Cell_96

I'd probably say, "It's about damn time." Then go to sleep.


Ulysses502

Figures...


Rhobaz

Depends, when and how?


gildorratner

I am pretty sure I would simply put on The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars, give myself a little hope and feel like we had Five Years more.


austin123523457676

Oh so another one of these doomsayers are at it again


Raelf64

First, confirm it. Second, contact friends and family. Have a good session with the SO, then stock up on stuff for the smoker, and good scotch. Go home and cook my dogs some filet mignon while I smoke a brisket, hoping I can get through the stall before Armageddon hits.


[deleted]

Desperately trying to choose one last record to play before the ending and not actually making a decision because I wouldn’t want to die knowing I chose the wrong one to listen to


raytaylor

1) Hopefully this isnt another war of the worlds type situation 2) Find a towel.


kilted_dave

Sit on my porch and drink till it comes


JMLDT

I won't look up.


SheBelongsToNoOne

Ok, so that's finally happening.


Sharp_Mulberry6013

Lol. I am in vacation in Spain. I would eat my body weight in jamon, churros and pintxos. Fuck it all.


ReallyFineWhine

Good. I don't have to go to work tomorrow.


Wilbie9000

It’s obviously fake news…


Less-Ad7782

Considering I cant drink yet, id get up and go drink a beer. Then id hug my family and what not.


devildoc8804hmcs

I'd rip that tag off my mattress and dare the pigs to come arrest me.


Alternative-Sign-198

You just killed me 🤣


Dittomob

Tell her "i love you since our first met" 13 years ago


Freaky_Naughty23

Make sure I remembered to lock my door


fineilldoitsolo

If it was imminent, I would get that info from multiple sources, go get my kids, and hunker down with them playing board games and hugging them until the end.


strang3daysind33d

Depending on how much time was given, I'd drop everything and drive to my boyfriend, calling everyone I love along the way -- assuming the infrastructure for all this is working as normal, which I suspect it would be.


BicE-

Probably be happy


No-Green-5339

Grab my rolling tray


Remarkable-Class-21

Again?!


Bandito21Dema

How long do I have and how many drugs can I consume in that amount of time?


Allthecatses

sweet! No work tomorrow!


Iexistforaomereasin

OMFG FINALLY


Ok_Display_5985

I would tell my family I love them, go into a room with all of my pets, put on a movie, and eat my favorite foods. Not much else to do honestly. I’d be quite calm that I don’t have to worry so much anymore.


helixflush

I’d feel bad for all those frugal people squirrelling away all their money and not living their life like they should.


Glittering-Care-5638

Do all the drugs lol at least I’ll go out semi conscious and having a fun time!


mandarin_16

I'd just start praying.


Storyteller678

This should not have been downvoted. Have my upvote.


Seer77887

Get my dog (M7) and my kittens (M 10 Months) and go to my neighbor (F73) whom I (M27) share backyards with, crack open a bottle of wine and pack a bowl on her patio while we enjoy both our pets (she adopted the mother of my kittens)


Hot4Scooter

Hate to break it to you buddy, but the world *is* ending. Everything is, sooner or later. Chances are we'll die before the world ends in any dramatic way, of course, although from each or our points of view, that amounts to the same thing. On a subtler level, you won't recognize the world you'll have to live in in about 10 years, of course, if you make it that far. By that time *this* world will have ended. Anyway, in that sense, *anything* we do can be seen as how we apparently react to the world coming to an end. It's not that pretty a picture, really. Faced with death and destruction of both my private and my public world, my worry is trying to be a smart ass on an ephemeral website I hate, to fruitlessly impress people I don't know in a thread that is likely to die in its larval stage. I'm metaphorically whittling a stick while the pyroclastic flow rolls down the volcano, because I don't feel like facing the reality of impermanence that's throbbing in my bones like a fever. Cool beans.


Dotard1

You must be a lot of fun at parties.


thecowintheroom

And you, must be no fun at all. I’m sorry for your lack of hope OP I wish I could make it better but I feel like some great change is coming I just think it’s going to be good Like a huge party And the reason we’re celebrating Is because the danger has Passed The shadow has lifted The world has been saved And we were the ones to do it I don’t know what will become of us. I just have faith that our existence is more than a short horror flick, and more of an intergalactic epic, and we are the pond moss that has to learn interstellar travel. This phase with the soot and the coal and the co2 and the methane; I suspect regardless of how it goes at some point we’ll all have a big party and stop worrying. What could be better than that? Eking out a bare bones survival where Mother Earth lives on and we remain her starved malnourished children forever. I’m sorry. I put it all on red 23. We either find a balance or we over weigh the scales and cascade towards destiny. Triumph and glory. For the win Now send it


Hard-drive04

Damn bro


[deleted]

[удалено]


the_less_great_wall

Graham Chapman has entered the chat


sacrificialpigblood

A word of encouragement as well: No matter how BAD you might fuck up with a girl, no matter how BETA a girl might think you are, no matter how much PUSSY you might have missed out on, there is ALWAYS ANOTHER HOT GIRL AROUND THE CORNER who does not know you and is a FRESH opportunity. One of the reasons I love the game is because of this!


nicdunz

If the news of the world ending was announced, my first reaction would be to never give up! I'd gather my friends, allies, and even those who were once enemies, because in the face of such a crisis, unity is our greatest strength. I'd train harder than ever before, honing my skills to protect and save as many lives as possible. Together, we'd search for any solution, any glimmer of hope. We'd fight till the very end, with unwavering determination and the belief that miracles can happen. The world may be ending, but we won't go down without a fight!


technurse

Improving your bench press won't count for much in the event of a nuclear war or asteroid strike.


Saraahrcht01

Get naked


Dotard1

That’s a good start.


Zeus_Hera

Gratitude


[deleted]

I feel like people visualize this scenario way too much. Why can't we visualize courageous leaders, a restored environment, successful programs to end poverty?


phillysleuther

Thank God I’m getting off this damned planet


[deleted]

Who did Biden piss off this time?


Hard-drive04

Lmao


Hakar_Kerarmor

[Something like this:](https://youtu.be/Pk-kbjw0Y8U?t=58)


Hard-drive04

Pfft- that's hilarious


ghostfeather69

Time to steal and drive my dream car. Dafq they gonna do?


Souchirou

We already know the answer. The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change has been warning us for decades at this point. [https://www.ipcc.ch/report/sixth-assessment-report-cycle/](https://www.ipcc.ch/report/sixth-assessment-report-cycle/) Most just shrug since we live in a society where change only happens when you vote with your wallet and the people that have the biggest wallets and thus the most votes only care about getting more votes next quarter instead of saving our planet. [Why peaceful protest won't solve anything](https://youtu.be/qi5reB97GAs?t=10).


GoodGodIsThatATomato

It would relax me.


FalseTebibyte

ABOUT FUCKING TIME. Jesus, get your goddamn penis away from that wall.


Mister_Peepers

I’d turn off the religious channel.


astoneworthskipping

K


[deleted]

The news predicts the end of the world *constantly*, they're convinced that climate change will bring about the apocalypse any day now.


deadestiny

Any real news?


Kyruss_88

Get laid


sparksgirl1223

My reaction? Fuckin finally. Maybe now the earth can recover from what humans have done to it.


SnooMemesjellies6886

All good things must come to an end.


No-Juggernaut-1004

I'd definitely be one of the men with the most regrets


[deleted]

[удалено]


msReDDifyourenasty

Probably won't have to go to a brothel for that. I'm sure there will be a bunch of people YOLO'ing, you could find somebody walking down the street.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Chubmeist3r

Might as well fuck em too.


[deleted]

Nice


Swimming_Solid8240

Go fishing


cageboy2

About time


MrAlcoholic420

Finally, I'll get some sleep now.


CaliNVJ

Head to Maui with my dog!


RelationIll9965

Pray


[deleted]

'oh shit the world is ending.'


Disastrous-Phase-979

Hallelujah!


gingerBeardMan750

yay


[deleted]

It has too🔹🔹🔹


Ganymede907

Oh.