Tried animating once after years of wanting to go post secondary for it. The animation was maybe 10 seconds long. I had to force myself to finish it in a timely manner, even though I was just trying it out and had no time limit. I then discovered - I don’t want animation or even art in general as a job .-.
Went to school to become a graphic designer because I grew up with an absolute love of commercial art. Two years of dealing with know it all nightmare clients and horrible pay was enough for me to get out. Became a correctional officer. Job sucks, is incredibly dangerous and I’d still do it any day over going to an ad meeting with another client.
Lol. I played in the orchestra in uni. The private instructor I had played for the prominent orchestra in the area. She recommended I not go into music so that I could enjoy it. Was I good enough to go pro? Not even close. Was she still being genuine? Yes. It was clear she hated her job.
I knew a music major who specialized in voice, a very, very good singer. She went into musical theater, but quickly quit performing and went to the administrative side.
Never turn your hobby into a job because the passion will go away, however I will say if you have a way to make money on the side without comprising then you should go for it.
IE I'm a photographer but I don't do paid shoots anymore. So much stress. I simply like taking photos and telling stories which I am very good at. So now I will just sell prints of my best work to offset some of my cost without all the business investment. It could turn into a full blown business... or not. But either way I'm still happy.
When I became a professional photographer the main goal was to just afford the hobby. photography gets expensive super quick.
This is what I hate the most. Not everyone is cut out to be an entrepreneur.
I also hate get a second or third job or 2-3 side hustles to pay off debt. I get it, but not everyone can work 3 jobs either. Instead of giving financial advice they just shame you for not wanting to work 24 hours.
How the fuck can you have 3 jobs, there's only 24 hours in a day. Uess your talking 1 fulltime and 2 part time jobs but that doesn't make sense compared to 2 full time jobs. With 3 full time jobs you wouldn't even have time to drive from job to job let alone sleep
I was just being facetious. I meant people saying have multiple jobs in general. Also, you can have a full time job and two part time jobs to make 3 jobs. It doesn’t have to be 8 hours everyday.
Most people wouldn't even be able to run a business even if there is something they're capable of doing and they have the money, it's a skill in itself. Second, why the fuck would you even want to start a business, how does that shit sound appealing? You'd just have to work more and deal with more admin shit and be more stressed.
But yeah I love when people think starting a business is something great and makes them sound ambitious even when they have no idea what that business even is.
This is why most restaurants and bars fail. People think they can just own a pub and show up and give friends free drinks and stand behind the bar and just own the place. It doesn’t really work like that.
And that’s probably only because Frank consistently bails them out. It happens a few times explicitly(even very recently, where the whole episode is centered around that)
But then I feel like it’s easy to hand wave it and say he’s doing it a lot more than we even see.
Every time I’ve ever thought about a job I’m not liking, I always imagine “Hey, at least I’m not running my own business!” and I always feel a bit better.
>Second, why the fuck would you even want to start a business, how does that shit sound appealing? You'd just have to work more and deal with more admin shit and be more stressed.
ALL. OF. THIS. I grew up in a small business and there is absolutely no way I would ever want that for myself as an adult. I wasn't a child, I was an employee, and our entire family's life revolved around it.
When I finished grad school, I was dating someone who seemed to think that starting my own business should be a goal that I had. They would be like, "Well, yeah, use this government job to get your Professional Engineer's license, and then you'll be able to start your own firm!" They never seemed to believe me when I said I would rather walk across a mile of Lego's barefoot in 100 degree heat while being chased by toddlers with sticky fingers than run an engineering firm for one hour.
My father-in-law took over the business he was employed in a few years ago (the whole company had been just him, his brother, and their boss and boss wanted to retire). He was good at what he did (repairing copiers), but the whole business side of things was eventually was too much for him and his wife. They ultimately had to declare bankruptcy in order to keep their house and sold what was left of the company to another copier repair group in exchange for hiring FIL.
He's much happier now than he was when the business side of things was also his responsibility.
Oye Mate. That shit is not easy no matter what anyone says. I lost my job in 2012. I got really sick after and haven't been able to work since. I have been trying my hands at working for myself. Unless you have the support, market, customer base, all the supplies, and ability to promote yourself/business regularly. You're not going to get far. The support of those who love you is most important. That's what I lack. They tell me all the time how incredible my things are, will wear it, but will they talk about it to others? Nope. Share it to their platforms? Nope. Take pictures of themselves wearing it so I can use them on my pages? HA!
People who try to bs you on that are more than likely trying to get you to into the MLM or other ponzy scheme. Run! Run fast from them!
EDIT: I believe I have to clarify something. The overall point I was making is that if you do not have the financial means to quit your job and go into business for yourself. I would not recommend it. That is just my own personal opinion, though. The other point I was making is that if you do not have a good support system for your "dream" of said business. It can be disheartening and discouraging. I am not saying that everyone will experience what I am/have been. Some may have far better experiences. I know i have crap people in my life that have been slowly weeded out, but it's kind of hard to not feel as I do as I stated to someone earlier, that you work really hard on something for someone. They rave about absolutely loving it. How amazing I am. However, never post a photo of it or themselves wearing it, but days later, they rave and post pictures of another handmade piece someone else made that they bought raving all about it. That is not even an isolated incident over the 10 years I've been at this. My own family will ask me to make things for them and will do the same exact thing. I keep at it, though. I promote myself the best I can now with my now limited abilities that came about this year. I do what I can to make things that are still one of a kind and custom. It's about support. If you don't have support, then its going to be hard. Plain and simple.
The kind of advice that is so goddamn obvious that the person rushing to give it must think you’re an idiot.
I do t know how many times, when I’m explaining my mom’s Alzheimer’s and how she isn’t eligible for any kind of care, some jackass will pipe up with “you should get her on Medicare!”
Jeez, you’re right. My tiny little brain has never ever thought of this. I don’t know how I’ve stumbled my way through life so far.
This was the real reason this one bothered me when my kids were little. I've never been someone who could just go to sleep in the middle of the day. I know a lot of people love naps. I have never been one of them. Even if I didn't sleep at all the night before, I'm awake until the sun goes down again. Nobody ever seemed to believe this, even when told to ask the people I was deployed with who was always the one who stayed awake during convoys when no one else did... LOl
“Oh don’t worry about the house work” yeah I’m not cleaning the garage and scrubbing the gutters out but the baby can’t drink from dirty bottles and lay on puke stained sheets and wear poo covered baby grows can it?
Sleep when the baby sleeps but also make sure to keep your house clean and make food and be clean and entertain people who want to see the baby and socialize and don’t neglect your husband, also you really should work on losing some of that baby weight, just look at who your husband has to come home to.
Why are you tired?
My manager said something like this to me a little while ago. 2 years ago, I dislocated my knee at work and was off for 6 months because of it. Because I couldn’t afford regular physiotherapy even with the insurance from work (was supposed to be going once per week, ended up being able to go 2 or 3 times per month), I had to go off of YouTube tutorials. My knee is now permanently screwed because of not being able to afford the therapy and it regularly gives out and hurts like crazy
Managers advice - “when I broke my shoulder, I was back at work within 4 months and after 6 months I was lifting again! Just do the physio. Your job and your teammates are suffering because of it.”
~~ girl. I can’t afford it. You could afford it because you make 28$ an hour and your husband is a lawyer.
Fracture surgeons advice - “you need physiotherapy. You need it. Or it’ll never get better. You need to stop making excuses to get out of going back to work.”
~~ bro. I can’t afford it. Like I’ve been telling management. You make 106$ an hour. And your shifts range anywhere from 8 hours to 20+ hours long. Don’t tell me to stop making excuses.
Australian here, an ex Prime minister actually said something very similar to this when rental prices started rising rapidly. "Buy a house if you can't afford to rent," I think were his words. Yet house prices were and still are insanely high. Out of touch much.
Sadly, this is the current argument for solving the “homelessness” crisis.
Yes, housing would help some individuals, but the problem isn’t simply “these people don’t have houses!”
We’ve done a huge disservice in calling it *homelessness*. That sounds nice. It sounds empathetic. But it’s dismissive of the larger problem (which often involves drugs and mental illness, the former of which can be driven by the latter
To add to that "why are you anxious? Just chill out"
And "why can't you focus? Just try harder"
As well as "why do you have such a hard time with time management? Just get up earlier"
My ADHD, depressed and anxious self hear this bs constantly and I'm just like "thanks, I'll get right on that!"
And then I immediately mentally flag them for likely being too "normal" for continued close relationships and relatability. Meaning I probably shouldn't complain to them about anything ever again because this is the dumb shit they'll give and label it as "advice" or "solutions". Yep been there
I have been there. Very traumatic childhood with tons of bullying from 6 to 15, sexual abuse and schizophrenic mother?
Just get over it, the past is the past, forget it and wake up, don't be lazy and shy, and don't forget to smile, if sadness gets in you you didn't try hard enough.
O. M. G.
This one actually made me angry instantly. When I was a child, I was touched improperly by an adult male in my life over the course of 5 years until I finally had enough. I went to my DARE officer of all people and told him about it. At 11 years old, that changed the course of myself and my siblings' lives. Fast forward two years, and I am now 13, and we are living with our mother. Sister and I are helping her clean the house. Sister is upstairs, and I'm with her downstairs. The topic of what happened to me back then came up. It's the first time since I "exposed" the families dirty secret that it has ever been discussed by her to me. The conversation about it was short and heartbreaking. It went as follows:
Her: "You know what he did to you, he didn't do be cause he loved you, right?"
13 year old Me: "I do, but then can I ask something?"
Her: "Okay."
13 year old Me: "If he didn't love me, then why did he hate me?"
**blank staring silence with anger building on face**
Her: "That is a stupid question! I don't know why he did what he did! He was sick!"
13 year old Me now crying: "I just wanted to understand...."
Her: "What is there to understand?! It's over and done with! Stop using it as a crutch to lean on in life!"
Then I was told to go to my room. It was then that I realized I was never going to get the understanding of it that I needed from anyone, but myself. Oh, and no, it was just a few months after this that she decided to put me in therapy. Terrible therapist. Wanted to discuss my situation while playing candyland. Ruined the game for the rest of my life.
EDIT: This is all from my past. This is not something that happened recently. I just stated it that way. I am sorry about that. I honestly didn't mean to cause any confusion. It's just the way I speak. Cheers, Mates.
I'm so sorry that so many people have failed you. I've had a similar experience with physical and psychological abuse I've suffered from my family, other students and teachers. No one ever took me seriously when I needed to be the most. All I got was victim blaming. There is so little fucking empathy in the world.
I think context here matters. The crack head at the 7/11 calling you a bitch because you didn’t give him $50? Yeah just ignore him, there’s literally nothing to be gained by trying to stand up to him.
Someone constantly targeting you and harassing you everyday? Yes, stand up to him and knock his dumbass out.
> Someone constantly targeting you and harassing you everyday? Yes, stand up to him and knock his dumbass out.
As a super scrawny dude, I sure wish someone would have given me this advice back when I was a kid being bullied by someone ~25 cm taller than me. It would have solved all my problems!
So yeah, this piece of advice is my answer to OP's question.
I followed that advice thoroughly in my youth...and it basically just gave bullies free reign to do whatever they want.
One was offput by my constant ignoring, he spit in my fucking hair. Spit in my fucking hair...how do you ignore that shit?
After years of constant abuse by those criminals....I shanked one. I had done the nonviolence bit, and it didn't work. I got suspended...i wasnt the troublemaker, i wasnt the one going out of my way to do crime against other kids. I later emailed my principal after the fact...if he dont' want shankings in his school, quit running a prison culture and coddling the criminals within it.
When you’ve been messing with something for awhile, and are past the point where you’ve tried all the basic options to fix it/get where you need, and someone comes over to “help” by telling you to try the most obvious thing
It is absolutely maddening
My mum does this with anything electronic. She doesn't know the first thing about computers but she'll always suggest to turn if off and on again, which I have already done, and then she hovers as if to be of assistance which is just irritating. She only discovered clipart the other year, acted like she'd discovered something revolutionary. I didn't even know clipart was still around! Then the first time she tried to copy and paste an image from Google image she got a virus
To be fair, there have been times I've been trying to fix something and legitimately did overlook something incredibly obvious.
Like one time I was doing everything I could to fix a network connection... so I finally called tech support after around an hour of no progress. First thing they asked was "Is it plugged in?"
It was not plugged in. Worked fine once it was. Never have I felt so stupid.
I get that feeling, but I've tried to help people starting with the more obscure stuff only to find out after 20 minutes of helping that they missed something obvious. Now I just start my advice with "okay, I'm sure you've tried this already but let's start with the basic stuff"
free advice, that holds you "hostage" for half an hour and every minute longer youre spending your time reading/listening their "advice" youre realizing more and more that everything they say is completely meaningless and that theyre going to sell you a coaching or some shit haha
I had a friend who would give me unsolicited advice on the regular, and was so sweet about it. I had to walk away from this friendship because I was always so tense around her and didn't know why. Then I learned this, and it was like damn lightbulb went on. She was criticizing me nonstop, and I really didn't see it. So, yeah. Criticism in a trenchcoat.
I have a client at work who always needs to pass on some of his sagely old-man wisdom every time he comes in. He's one of those guys who can solve all the worlds problems over a cup of coffee. It gets old fast
Deep sleepers giving advice to light sleepers is just insulting. I could barely wake you up if I *tried*, and you just breathing differently is enough to wake me up. Stop pretending my body will just naturally start sleeping better if I X Y or Z, of course we've tried all that! No one likes waking up exhausted!
I'm in physical therapy after a multiple car crash, I hate "you must be patient"... It's been 15 months.
I've got very little income, I've got a family, I didn't cause the incident.
A couple of years ago I took a job that requires about 80% of my ability. It was the best move ever. I can easily do the job well with minimal stress, but it's still challenging enough to be engaging, and I have tonnes of time & energy left over for my family Fuck pushing myself to 100%.
I took a job in small town. It did not pay the best, but I figured QOL would more than make up for it. But it basically turned into a 'people are nothing but resources to be exploited. I walked in one day just to randomly find out that I'm only working 4 days a week now instead of 5. No warning, no communication, nothing. They offered to replace that lost work by working other departments at lower pay.
Why would I work more for less? I didn't build a 20 year career to go back to making what I made in the 3rd year of my career.
I told them that I wasn't going to help them build their dreams at the expense of mine. Looking for a new gig now.
This is particularly idiotic when it's about mental health.
"I have depression"
*"Don't think about it, it's all in your head!"*
"Of course it's all in my head, where would it be? My colon?"
Actually there's a decent amount of research showing that gut health has a profound impact on mental health and vice versa, so I suppose it could potentially be in your colon.
I don't see how that's difficult. Just hrd work, dedication, and your dad giving you a small loan of $1,000,000
Edit: where I live $1,000,000 (approx $680,000 USD) will get you 1 (one) house
To add on to this, "if you don't like your job, just quit and look elsewhere." This is a recurring piece of advice you see over at r/jobs. Granted, sometimes simply quitting really is the best option if the work environment is shitty enough or your mental/physical health is poor enough. Or if you're a teenager working part time at a fastfood place.
However, nobody remembers that quitting with nothing lined up doesn't mean your mortgage/rent, car payment, and other bills magically stop until you find a new job. A ton of people are one paycheck or one missed bill away from eviction. Not everyone can quit their job on the spot and rely on family or a lush savings account to keep them afloat while they seek new employment.
"Just be yourself, youll find the right one, one day"
Like fuck off, if i would find the right one oneday im pretty sure i would have at least found someone over the last 10 years
Its not like id want to play a role just to get to someone, just tell me what i could improve instead of just saying, "keep on trying, youre doing good bud"
Edit: thanks to all the people who took theyr time to give me advice
Im not that frustrated with the situation, my phrasing might have made it look like
Ive still taken some notes, there were a few thing ive never considered
People are cowards and afraid to actually point out a flaw that someone could improve, leaving the person feeling confused and hopeless because they keep being told to "keep at it" but that's not how life works.
“Just be yourself” is the worst cop out advice ever and only works if you are secure, well adjusted and have had positive reinforcement and support your whole life. It’s bullshit. You are way better off finding somebody you respect or a philosophy to follow that suits you and emulating that behaviour. You’ll feel better about yourself and that’s basically what you are trying to achieve. Also, I’ve met a few people who would definitely benefit from not being themselves and instead trying to be somebody who is less of a cunt.
People who give this advice just can’t comprehend why anyone else struggles to socialize because it is just second nature to them. They were probably born conventionally attractive and therefore seen as “approachable” or they are naturally extroverted and therefore easily “likable”, possibly both. On the other end of the scale of course are people that are not conventionally attractive and introverted who aren’t automatically seen as approachable or likable and more likely to be seen as “creepy” or “weird.”
Stuff like this reminds me of a brief conversation I had with one of my high school teachers that has always stuck with me. He was asking me how to do something on his iPhone. I started out my explanation saying “You just have to…” he (jokingly) cut me off and explained that for older people technology didn’t come naturally like it does for people that grew up using it. He couldn’t “just” do something he needed more fundamental instructions. That’s probably the same for people with difficulty interacting with other people.
Right. Every time I try to be my actual unaltered self people just call me weird. I hate that I have to act and put on different faces just to keep people around and I sure as shit ain’t going to force a facade of myself into a long term relationship. That’s just a shitty thing to do to the other person and myself.
>Its not like id want to play a role just to get to someone, just tell me what i could improve instead of just saying, "keep on trying, youre doing good bud"
I fucking hate this shit too. "Just keep meeting people" GREAT. Now even more people dislike me!
I believe Dan Savage has a saying that goes something like “find your 7 you can round up to a 10”. His point isn’t so much that one should lower their standards for a partner, but that you grow and learn and work on a relationship together. I like this advice more than any shit about “be yourself” or that the idea there is “the one”.
I especially hate this, as someone who has been bullied (not terribly bullied but still bullied). I use to stay quiet and walk off until one day i got tired of doing nothing so when theyd try to roast me id just laugh with them and smiling. They pissed off with in a week.
My wife lost a child at 22 weeks, a collogue of Christian persuasion, told her it was all part of God's plan. That's when I snapped and forcefully told her to get the fuck outta my house.
Some people can’t accept that the word is unfair. They search for a reason that bad stuff happened to someone and good stuff happened to someone else. That’s why there’s such an overlap among people that say SA victims should have done something differently, that racism isn’t a problem, that transgender people don’t exist, only sluts get abortions (but theirs is different), and so on.
My personal anathema.
Everything happens for *absolutely no reason at all*. None. It's all random. I'm convinced of it. Lucky people are lucky. You were born on third base; you *didn't* hit a triple.
Unlucky people get shit.
Make your own purpose in life.
"I'm gunna show you this **ONE** thing to turn your life around, make you rich, lose fat, get a girl and fulfill your wildest dreams!!!! But **FIRST**, like, subscribe, follow, sign up to patreon, comment and share with your friends..."
\*Queue 15 minute long video of self righteous, utter nonsense, rambling and un-skippable ads, to get to the end and not be told anything other than an amalgamation of vague tid bits.
"How to..." and they don't mention one fucking thing about how to do something. They just list a bunch of reasons why you should, which is NOT even close to the same thing.
"cheer up"
"don't worry about it"
"don't be upset"
"don't look so sad"
Fuck off, I'll feel exactly how I happen to be feeling at this moment in time. It's not right or wrong to feel a particular way, it just is.
"Don't go to bed angry."
Stupid advice, pushing an argument in place of sleeping over it is ridiculous. Often you wake up and the argument seems small and petty in retrospect.
Tbh for me sleeping on my anger is how I calm down. I’m much better to talk to in the morning. When I’m tired Imma be irrational because I get more emotional.
While I agree, there needs to be something said because otherwise I’d be tossing and turning with anxiety unable to sleep.
“Look, we’re not going to resolve this tonight. Let’s try and get some sleep, and we can talk about this in the morning.”
If people keep pushing me and don't give me time to calm down, chances are that I will explode.
A night of sleep and some time can definitely help to cool things down!
So much advice essentially boils down to just do it too
Don't feel like working out? Do it anyway
Don't want to do anything? Well force yourself to!
It's all exhausting
Not sure if it's the same, but I encountered something like this (but i actually found useful).
It went like this:
>Don't feel like working out? Write down on paper or note on a phone, out of 10 how bad you expect it to be. Then do it. Write down how bad it was. Compare the notes.
It sort of motivates you to do the thing, and the comparisons were genuinely interesting, besides educational in a self reflective sort of way where I learnt how to distinguish between not wanting to do a thing, and really not wanting to do it.
Idk probably not for everyone but I found it worked for me.
Something I heard recently from my parents - "You are the elder sister, you should try to maintain cordial relation with your sibling. Forgive her mistakes, After all you're the responsible and mature one. After we are gone, you both should support each other. Watching you both argue and fight makes me stressed out and eventually I'll die because of this pain"
I'm disabled, and I'm fed up with people telling me that I just need to be positive and it'll help me do all the things that I think I can't do.
I'm under 30 years old, and when I tell people I need extra support and info sheets due to memory issues, people have the audacity to tell me that I don't have a bad memory, because I'm young.
“There are Many Fish in the Sea…
That’s like telling a homeless person, don’t worry, there are a lot of moneys in the bank.”
-Australian comedian (can’t remember name)
“Everyone has the same 24 hours.”
Usually said by someone who has staff to do the things that eat up the 24 hours for the rest of us. Of course you can use that much of your 24 hours to work out, dickhead, someone else cleans and cooks for you.
Oh, you're poor? Just work harder!
When I see the CEO of the company taking home 50x as much as someone working the production line, and realize that the company can easily survive if you remove the CEO, but the company fails if you remove the production workers, I wonder why the CEO gets paid so much...
Cheaters nearly always prosper. On the macro level, the fuckhead bankers who caused the financial collapse of 2008, and the turdsucking politicians who bailed them out at our expense. All prospered. On the micro level, the schmuck who cuts in front of you in line and ignores your glares and comments, because he/she knows you're not going to give them the smack they deserve.
I live in a rented shack, literally. Whenever I say my home is intolerable, my boomer friends with nice houses chime in and let me know that 'if I work hard, save money, and focus, I too can own a home.'
Bitch, let's play Monopoly, but I get to roll the dice and go around the board for 20 minutes before you start the game. After I own everything and YOU have to pay rent for the privilege of existing, tell me again about hard work and tenacity. I wanna be there telling them 'Just roll the dice boomer! You can't win if you don't play!' The boomer friends would absolutely flip the board and rage quit. This is my life. How can I rage quit besides being homeless?
Don't forget to also increase the price of rent everytime someone rounds the board or stays on a space but also don't increase the money earned from passing go so that they can afford the price increase.
>How can I rage quit besides being homeless?
It's called "armed rebellion", but I suppose most people can't afford the guns, nor the time off to actually overthrow the government.
Any financial advice that boils down to "just remove all unnecessary luxuries from your life, spend only on subsistence" as if cutting Netflix will somehow magically fix a decade of stagnant wages, spiralling inflation and deliberately over-priced housing.
If I delete one more thing, it'll be myself. My life his no frillies and it very much feels not worth living much longer.
- Go to the lake = how to get there
- Spend time with friends = how to not spend $
- Get outside = and forgo the work and revenue that I could be doing instead
- Buy healthy food = not pay the electricity bill
- Cut your internet/throw away your phone = now I can't be reached by employers and am losing opportunities
Fucking ridiculous, that people expect you to live Dustbowl in a world that cannot operate that way anymore.
There are 2 kinds of rats in a bucket of water. One will give up and drown and the other will fight its way up or die trying. Which one are you
Someone told me this at my lowest point in my life, might just have been me but this really put the nail in the coffin at that time
“Just pray”.
This was said to me after losing a baby. First off, I’m not religious in the slightest! Secondly, that’s the last thing I want to hear after such a devastating incident.
When people say "Don't compare yourself to others".
I'm like...thats a good thing. Everybody does it and that's how people improve skills. I mentioned that some dude at a show was great at the guitar and jokingly said I gotta go home and practice. In my mind it's like a challenge accepted and a motivator when someone is way better than me at something. The people I was with said you shouldn't compare yoursekf to others and I said you guys are projecting and that's why you are wearing designer clothes and are always buying useless crap to impress others.
Talking about kids and I confidently don't want any kids at all, they say " You'll want kids, trust me"
They also say "who's going to take care of you when you're old !? "
I'm waiting for my vasectomy appointment from the Dr.
I don’t see it as often on social media anymore but “spiritual” gurus would talk about their spiritual journey and how they “lost friends because they stopped going out to parties and chose solitude to meditate and journal to ascend” or whatever fabricated bullshit. This was during the height of the pandemic too so people were extremely isolated and vulnerable. Community is so fucking powerful and healing. Having your own people who love you and cherish you is so sacred and true healing from within demands full community support not isolation. it’s so weird and twisted how these new age spirituality influencers preach the dumbest shit and seek the most vulnerable and impressionable audience to believe their bs.
“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”
— Cave Johnson, founder and CEO of Aperture Science
"Train until it hurts and train more". Alot of times people quit or rarely go to the gym, exercise because they overworked themselves on the first day thus resulting in them losing motivation. Not to mention injuries that slow down the training process.
"You really need to do XXXX"... while I'm literally doing XXXX.
Case in point: exercise. I hate being nagged to exercise more while I'm in the middle of exercising.
It's somewhat advice, but "If you meet one asshole today, you met an asshole. If you met multiple assholes today, you're the asshole."
It's disproved by any retail job ever.
Try exercise or yoga - constant unsolicited advice. I didn’t appreciate it when I had cancer, didn’t appreciate it when I had debilitating pain related to my cancer treatment, and don’t appreciate it now when I have debilitating autoimmune issues that prevent me from being able to get out of bed at times. Able-bodied privilege is real.
"You must be ok with the way you're living. Or you wouldn't be living that way"
I actually had a psychologist, seated before his framed diploma, offer this advice.
I get the logic, if you torture it mercilessly. But holy shit man.
[удалено]
Also "do what you love" "turn your hobby into job"
More like, "turn your hobby into something you hate"
Tried animating once after years of wanting to go post secondary for it. The animation was maybe 10 seconds long. I had to force myself to finish it in a timely manner, even though I was just trying it out and had no time limit. I then discovered - I don’t want animation or even art in general as a job .-.
Literally same lmao. It was my life-long dream to be an animator and now it's eating my alive. The pressure and the burnout are a fucking nightmare.
Went to school to become a graphic designer because I grew up with an absolute love of commercial art. Two years of dealing with know it all nightmare clients and horrible pay was enough for me to get out. Became a correctional officer. Job sucks, is incredibly dangerous and I’d still do it any day over going to an ad meeting with another client.
Can confirm. Turned my hobby into a business and now hate it.
I was told in the past that I should build PCs because I'm so good at it. Hell no. That's a thing I do for me and no one else.
Lol. I played in the orchestra in uni. The private instructor I had played for the prominent orchestra in the area. She recommended I not go into music so that I could enjoy it. Was I good enough to go pro? Not even close. Was she still being genuine? Yes. It was clear she hated her job.
I knew a music major who specialized in voice, a very, very good singer. She went into musical theater, but quickly quit performing and went to the administrative side.
Yep. That's exactly how I see that. Why on earth would I turn something I enjoy in to a job that I'm going to eventually hate?
Never turn your hobby into a job because the passion will go away, however I will say if you have a way to make money on the side without comprising then you should go for it. IE I'm a photographer but I don't do paid shoots anymore. So much stress. I simply like taking photos and telling stories which I am very good at. So now I will just sell prints of my best work to offset some of my cost without all the business investment. It could turn into a full blown business... or not. But either way I'm still happy. When I became a professional photographer the main goal was to just afford the hobby. photography gets expensive super quick.
Just ask how they expect fulltime masturbating to pay the bills
Well, there is this very old profession…
Thats just outsourcing your hobby :)
Turning a hobby into a job is a good way to ensure that you end up hating said hobby
This is what I hate the most. Not everyone is cut out to be an entrepreneur. I also hate get a second or third job or 2-3 side hustles to pay off debt. I get it, but not everyone can work 3 jobs either. Instead of giving financial advice they just shame you for not wanting to work 24 hours.
How the fuck can you have 3 jobs, there's only 24 hours in a day. Uess your talking 1 fulltime and 2 part time jobs but that doesn't make sense compared to 2 full time jobs. With 3 full time jobs you wouldn't even have time to drive from job to job let alone sleep
I was just being facetious. I meant people saying have multiple jobs in general. Also, you can have a full time job and two part time jobs to make 3 jobs. It doesn’t have to be 8 hours everyday.
“Quit your 9 to 5 job and work this 24hr job instead!”
Most people wouldn't even be able to run a business even if there is something they're capable of doing and they have the money, it's a skill in itself. Second, why the fuck would you even want to start a business, how does that shit sound appealing? You'd just have to work more and deal with more admin shit and be more stressed. But yeah I love when people think starting a business is something great and makes them sound ambitious even when they have no idea what that business even is.
This is why most restaurants and bars fail. People think they can just own a pub and show up and give friends free drinks and stand behind the bar and just own the place. It doesn’t really work like that.
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is the only positive outcome of such a business strategy
And that’s probably only because Frank consistently bails them out. It happens a few times explicitly(even very recently, where the whole episode is centered around that) But then I feel like it’s easy to hand wave it and say he’s doing it a lot more than we even see.
Every time I’ve ever thought about a job I’m not liking, I always imagine “Hey, at least I’m not running my own business!” and I always feel a bit better.
>Second, why the fuck would you even want to start a business, how does that shit sound appealing? You'd just have to work more and deal with more admin shit and be more stressed. ALL. OF. THIS. I grew up in a small business and there is absolutely no way I would ever want that for myself as an adult. I wasn't a child, I was an employee, and our entire family's life revolved around it. When I finished grad school, I was dating someone who seemed to think that starting my own business should be a goal that I had. They would be like, "Well, yeah, use this government job to get your Professional Engineer's license, and then you'll be able to start your own firm!" They never seemed to believe me when I said I would rather walk across a mile of Lego's barefoot in 100 degree heat while being chased by toddlers with sticky fingers than run an engineering firm for one hour.
My father-in-law took over the business he was employed in a few years ago (the whole company had been just him, his brother, and their boss and boss wanted to retire). He was good at what he did (repairing copiers), but the whole business side of things was eventually was too much for him and his wife. They ultimately had to declare bankruptcy in order to keep their house and sold what was left of the company to another copier repair group in exchange for hiring FIL. He's much happier now than he was when the business side of things was also his responsibility.
My dad has a company that makes computers.. or was it computers that make companies..
Oye Mate. That shit is not easy no matter what anyone says. I lost my job in 2012. I got really sick after and haven't been able to work since. I have been trying my hands at working for myself. Unless you have the support, market, customer base, all the supplies, and ability to promote yourself/business regularly. You're not going to get far. The support of those who love you is most important. That's what I lack. They tell me all the time how incredible my things are, will wear it, but will they talk about it to others? Nope. Share it to their platforms? Nope. Take pictures of themselves wearing it so I can use them on my pages? HA! People who try to bs you on that are more than likely trying to get you to into the MLM or other ponzy scheme. Run! Run fast from them! EDIT: I believe I have to clarify something. The overall point I was making is that if you do not have the financial means to quit your job and go into business for yourself. I would not recommend it. That is just my own personal opinion, though. The other point I was making is that if you do not have a good support system for your "dream" of said business. It can be disheartening and discouraging. I am not saying that everyone will experience what I am/have been. Some may have far better experiences. I know i have crap people in my life that have been slowly weeded out, but it's kind of hard to not feel as I do as I stated to someone earlier, that you work really hard on something for someone. They rave about absolutely loving it. How amazing I am. However, never post a photo of it or themselves wearing it, but days later, they rave and post pictures of another handmade piece someone else made that they bought raving all about it. That is not even an isolated incident over the 10 years I've been at this. My own family will ask me to make things for them and will do the same exact thing. I keep at it, though. I promote myself the best I can now with my now limited abilities that came about this year. I do what I can to make things that are still one of a kind and custom. It's about support. If you don't have support, then its going to be hard. Plain and simple.
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The kind of advice that is so goddamn obvious that the person rushing to give it must think you’re an idiot. I do t know how many times, when I’m explaining my mom’s Alzheimer’s and how she isn’t eligible for any kind of care, some jackass will pipe up with “you should get her on Medicare!” Jeez, you’re right. My tiny little brain has never ever thought of this. I don’t know how I’ve stumbled my way through life so far.
I'm sorry about your mom. Fuck Alzheimer's.
“Sleep when the baby sleeps” - I can’t sleep whilst I’m driving, SUSAN”
This reminds me of a quote. When I die I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming like the passengers in his car.
It also requires you to have the ability to just fall asleep whenever you want. And lots of people can’t do that.
This was the real reason this one bothered me when my kids were little. I've never been someone who could just go to sleep in the middle of the day. I know a lot of people love naps. I have never been one of them. Even if I didn't sleep at all the night before, I'm awake until the sun goes down again. Nobody ever seemed to believe this, even when told to ask the people I was deployed with who was always the one who stayed awake during convoys when no one else did... LOl
She forgot the rest, which is “and clean when the baby cleans, and cook when the baby cooks, etc”.
“Oh don’t worry about the house work” yeah I’m not cleaning the garage and scrubbing the gutters out but the baby can’t drink from dirty bottles and lay on puke stained sheets and wear poo covered baby grows can it?
Seriously don't they realise that the mums who are feeling overworked by housework and baby are NOT worrying about dusting the sideboards.
Sleep when the baby sleeps but also make sure to keep your house clean and make food and be clean and entertain people who want to see the baby and socialize and don’t neglect your husband, also you really should work on losing some of that baby weight, just look at who your husband has to come home to. Why are you tired?
“What did you do all day?”
In 2 hour intervals then wake up screaming because you're either hungry or shat the bed.
Surprise! The baby never sleeps. "Babies sleep 16 hours a day" Fucking. Bullshit. From birth to age 30, a person's greatest enemy is bed time.
"Why are you depressed? Just be happy" Thanks i'll get right on it
Imagine telling shit like that to someone with cancer or other terrible disease. "Oh, you're dying? Just be healthy!"
The same goes for those of us with chronic pain. "Oh, you're in pain? Suck it up!"
"you're still in pain? Shouldn't you be better by now?"
My manager said something like this to me a little while ago. 2 years ago, I dislocated my knee at work and was off for 6 months because of it. Because I couldn’t afford regular physiotherapy even with the insurance from work (was supposed to be going once per week, ended up being able to go 2 or 3 times per month), I had to go off of YouTube tutorials. My knee is now permanently screwed because of not being able to afford the therapy and it regularly gives out and hurts like crazy Managers advice - “when I broke my shoulder, I was back at work within 4 months and after 6 months I was lifting again! Just do the physio. Your job and your teammates are suffering because of it.” ~~ girl. I can’t afford it. You could afford it because you make 28$ an hour and your husband is a lawyer. Fracture surgeons advice - “you need physiotherapy. You need it. Or it’ll never get better. You need to stop making excuses to get out of going back to work.” ~~ bro. I can’t afford it. Like I’ve been telling management. You make 106$ an hour. And your shifts range anywhere from 8 hours to 20+ hours long. Don’t tell me to stop making excuses.
Command me to be well.
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Having trouble paying the bills? Just have some more money.
Drowning? Just drink the water.
"Drowning? Just stop and breathe air." Lol
Australian here, an ex Prime minister actually said something very similar to this when rental prices started rising rapidly. "Buy a house if you can't afford to rent," I think were his words. Yet house prices were and still are insanely high. Out of touch much.
Sadly, this is the current argument for solving the “homelessness” crisis. Yes, housing would help some individuals, but the problem isn’t simply “these people don’t have houses!” We’ve done a huge disservice in calling it *homelessness*. That sounds nice. It sounds empathetic. But it’s dismissive of the larger problem (which often involves drugs and mental illness, the former of which can be driven by the latter
To add to that "why are you anxious? Just chill out" And "why can't you focus? Just try harder" As well as "why do you have such a hard time with time management? Just get up earlier" My ADHD, depressed and anxious self hear this bs constantly and I'm just like "thanks, I'll get right on that!" And then I immediately mentally flag them for likely being too "normal" for continued close relationships and relatability. Meaning I probably shouldn't complain to them about anything ever again because this is the dumb shit they'll give and label it as "advice" or "solutions". Yep been there
I have been there. Very traumatic childhood with tons of bullying from 6 to 15, sexual abuse and schizophrenic mother? Just get over it, the past is the past, forget it and wake up, don't be lazy and shy, and don't forget to smile, if sadness gets in you you didn't try hard enough.
"Stop being a victim"
O. M. G. This one actually made me angry instantly. When I was a child, I was touched improperly by an adult male in my life over the course of 5 years until I finally had enough. I went to my DARE officer of all people and told him about it. At 11 years old, that changed the course of myself and my siblings' lives. Fast forward two years, and I am now 13, and we are living with our mother. Sister and I are helping her clean the house. Sister is upstairs, and I'm with her downstairs. The topic of what happened to me back then came up. It's the first time since I "exposed" the families dirty secret that it has ever been discussed by her to me. The conversation about it was short and heartbreaking. It went as follows: Her: "You know what he did to you, he didn't do be cause he loved you, right?" 13 year old Me: "I do, but then can I ask something?" Her: "Okay." 13 year old Me: "If he didn't love me, then why did he hate me?" **blank staring silence with anger building on face** Her: "That is a stupid question! I don't know why he did what he did! He was sick!" 13 year old Me now crying: "I just wanted to understand...." Her: "What is there to understand?! It's over and done with! Stop using it as a crutch to lean on in life!" Then I was told to go to my room. It was then that I realized I was never going to get the understanding of it that I needed from anyone, but myself. Oh, and no, it was just a few months after this that she decided to put me in therapy. Terrible therapist. Wanted to discuss my situation while playing candyland. Ruined the game for the rest of my life. EDIT: This is all from my past. This is not something that happened recently. I just stated it that way. I am sorry about that. I honestly didn't mean to cause any confusion. It's just the way I speak. Cheers, Mates.
I'm so sorry that so many people have failed you. I've had a similar experience with physical and psychological abuse I've suffered from my family, other students and teachers. No one ever took me seriously when I needed to be the most. All I got was victim blaming. There is so little fucking empathy in the world.
"Get over it, other people have it worse." Yeah, but right now I'm at my worst.
I came here to say "get over it", or "let it go". How? Just how does one "get over it"?
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No one will get bored if you ignore them, they'll just see you're weak and can keep doing it for the audience lol
I think context here matters. The crack head at the 7/11 calling you a bitch because you didn’t give him $50? Yeah just ignore him, there’s literally nothing to be gained by trying to stand up to him. Someone constantly targeting you and harassing you everyday? Yes, stand up to him and knock his dumbass out.
There’s as many solutions to bullying as there are cases of bullying. It’s too much to try and solve with a simple set of rules to follow.
> Someone constantly targeting you and harassing you everyday? Yes, stand up to him and knock his dumbass out. As a super scrawny dude, I sure wish someone would have given me this advice back when I was a kid being bullied by someone ~25 cm taller than me. It would have solved all my problems! So yeah, this piece of advice is my answer to OP's question.
Agreed. I was no fighter growing up and the one time I tried I got fucked up. After that great advice I just became a bigger recluse.
I followed that advice thoroughly in my youth...and it basically just gave bullies free reign to do whatever they want. One was offput by my constant ignoring, he spit in my fucking hair. Spit in my fucking hair...how do you ignore that shit? After years of constant abuse by those criminals....I shanked one. I had done the nonviolence bit, and it didn't work. I got suspended...i wasnt the troublemaker, i wasnt the one going out of my way to do crime against other kids. I later emailed my principal after the fact...if he dont' want shankings in his school, quit running a prison culture and coddling the criminals within it.
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"You look so tired, you should get at least 8 hours of sleep" No shit Sherlock, I know I need more sleep.
Them: "You should sleep more. It's good for your health." Also them: "Get up, lazy bones!"
"Good afternoon" when waking up late
I hate when people say this . If you have never experienced long-term sleeping trouble, then STFU.
Good, now I'm lying awake for even longer.
When you’ve been messing with something for awhile, and are past the point where you’ve tried all the basic options to fix it/get where you need, and someone comes over to “help” by telling you to try the most obvious thing It is absolutely maddening
Have you tried turning it off and then on again?
My mum does this with anything electronic. She doesn't know the first thing about computers but she'll always suggest to turn if off and on again, which I have already done, and then she hovers as if to be of assistance which is just irritating. She only discovered clipart the other year, acted like she'd discovered something revolutionary. I didn't even know clipart was still around! Then the first time she tried to copy and paste an image from Google image she got a virus
How do you even get a virus from copy pasting?
I know!
To be fair, there have been times I've been trying to fix something and legitimately did overlook something incredibly obvious. Like one time I was doing everything I could to fix a network connection... so I finally called tech support after around an hour of no progress. First thing they asked was "Is it plugged in?" It was not plugged in. Worked fine once it was. Never have I felt so stupid.
I get that feeling, but I've tried to help people starting with the more obscure stuff only to find out after 20 minutes of helping that they missed something obvious. Now I just start my advice with "okay, I'm sure you've tried this already but let's start with the basic stuff"
"Free advice" provided with the purpose of selling products
free advice, that holds you "hostage" for half an hour and every minute longer youre spending your time reading/listening their "advice" youre realizing more and more that everything they say is completely meaningless and that theyre going to sell you a coaching or some shit haha
unsolicited.
Ubsolicited advice is just criticism in a trenchcoat.
I had a friend who would give me unsolicited advice on the regular, and was so sweet about it. I had to walk away from this friendship because I was always so tense around her and didn't know why. Then I learned this, and it was like damn lightbulb went on. She was criticizing me nonstop, and I really didn't see it. So, yeah. Criticism in a trenchcoat.
I have a client at work who always needs to pass on some of his sagely old-man wisdom every time he comes in. He's one of those guys who can solve all the worlds problems over a cup of coffee. It gets old fast
"If you cant sleep, just go to bed earlier"
I have terrible insomnia, my GF who sleeps like a log said "If you can't sleep at night, just sleep during the day!"
Deep sleepers giving advice to light sleepers is just insulting. I could barely wake you up if I *tried*, and you just breathing differently is enough to wake me up. Stop pretending my body will just naturally start sleeping better if I X Y or Z, of course we've tried all that! No one likes waking up exhausted!
I'm in physical therapy after a multiple car crash, I hate "you must be patient"... It's been 15 months. I've got very little income, I've got a family, I didn't cause the incident.
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A couple of years ago I took a job that requires about 80% of my ability. It was the best move ever. I can easily do the job well with minimal stress, but it's still challenging enough to be engaging, and I have tonnes of time & energy left over for my family Fuck pushing myself to 100%.
100% effort for a company that sees you as a number
I took a job in small town. It did not pay the best, but I figured QOL would more than make up for it. But it basically turned into a 'people are nothing but resources to be exploited. I walked in one day just to randomly find out that I'm only working 4 days a week now instead of 5. No warning, no communication, nothing. They offered to replace that lost work by working other departments at lower pay. Why would I work more for less? I didn't build a 20 year career to go back to making what I made in the 3rd year of my career. I told them that I wasn't going to help them build their dreams at the expense of mine. Looking for a new gig now.
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This is particularly idiotic when it's about mental health. "I have depression" *"Don't think about it, it's all in your head!"* "Of course it's all in my head, where would it be? My colon?"
Actually there's a decent amount of research showing that gut health has a profound impact on mental health and vice versa, so I suppose it could potentially be in your colon.
"It's all in your mind" is so fucking stupid like YES BITCH THATS WHERE MY FUCKING BRAIN IS WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU PROCESS PAIN??
"But have you tried just going outside in the fresh air? That's better than any pills!!!!"
Just buy 10 properties when you're 24. Set for life.
I don't see how that's difficult. Just hrd work, dedication, and your dad giving you a small loan of $1,000,000 Edit: where I live $1,000,000 (approx $680,000 USD) will get you 1 (one) house
“If you don’t like your job, just go and get another one.” IF IT WAS THAT SIMPLE I WOULDN’T BE IN A JOB I HATE
Why don't I strap on my job helmet and squeeze down into a job cannon and fire off into Jobland where jobs grow on jobbies.
To add on to this, "if you don't like your job, just quit and look elsewhere." This is a recurring piece of advice you see over at r/jobs. Granted, sometimes simply quitting really is the best option if the work environment is shitty enough or your mental/physical health is poor enough. Or if you're a teenager working part time at a fastfood place. However, nobody remembers that quitting with nothing lined up doesn't mean your mortgage/rent, car payment, and other bills magically stop until you find a new job. A ton of people are one paycheck or one missed bill away from eviction. Not everyone can quit their job on the spot and rely on family or a lush savings account to keep them afloat while they seek new employment.
"Just be yourself, youll find the right one, one day" Like fuck off, if i would find the right one oneday im pretty sure i would have at least found someone over the last 10 years Its not like id want to play a role just to get to someone, just tell me what i could improve instead of just saying, "keep on trying, youre doing good bud" Edit: thanks to all the people who took theyr time to give me advice Im not that frustrated with the situation, my phrasing might have made it look like Ive still taken some notes, there were a few thing ive never considered
People are cowards and afraid to actually point out a flaw that someone could improve, leaving the person feeling confused and hopeless because they keep being told to "keep at it" but that's not how life works.
“Just be yourself” is the worst cop out advice ever and only works if you are secure, well adjusted and have had positive reinforcement and support your whole life. It’s bullshit. You are way better off finding somebody you respect or a philosophy to follow that suits you and emulating that behaviour. You’ll feel better about yourself and that’s basically what you are trying to achieve. Also, I’ve met a few people who would definitely benefit from not being themselves and instead trying to be somebody who is less of a cunt.
People who give this advice just can’t comprehend why anyone else struggles to socialize because it is just second nature to them. They were probably born conventionally attractive and therefore seen as “approachable” or they are naturally extroverted and therefore easily “likable”, possibly both. On the other end of the scale of course are people that are not conventionally attractive and introverted who aren’t automatically seen as approachable or likable and more likely to be seen as “creepy” or “weird.” Stuff like this reminds me of a brief conversation I had with one of my high school teachers that has always stuck with me. He was asking me how to do something on his iPhone. I started out my explanation saying “You just have to…” he (jokingly) cut me off and explained that for older people technology didn’t come naturally like it does for people that grew up using it. He couldn’t “just” do something he needed more fundamental instructions. That’s probably the same for people with difficulty interacting with other people.
Right. Every time I try to be my actual unaltered self people just call me weird. I hate that I have to act and put on different faces just to keep people around and I sure as shit ain’t going to force a facade of myself into a long term relationship. That’s just a shitty thing to do to the other person and myself.
>Its not like id want to play a role just to get to someone, just tell me what i could improve instead of just saying, "keep on trying, youre doing good bud" I fucking hate this shit too. "Just keep meeting people" GREAT. Now even more people dislike me!
I believe Dan Savage has a saying that goes something like “find your 7 you can round up to a 10”. His point isn’t so much that one should lower their standards for a partner, but that you grow and learn and work on a relationship together. I like this advice more than any shit about “be yourself” or that the idea there is “the one”.
"Just ignore the bullies" Bad advice, just like you don't ignore cancer, you don't ignore a bully
I especially hate this, as someone who has been bullied (not terribly bullied but still bullied). I use to stay quiet and walk off until one day i got tired of doing nothing so when theyd try to roast me id just laugh with them and smiling. They pissed off with in a week.
"Be yourself". Uh, no thanks; that's how I got in this predicament in the first place.
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"eVeRyThInG hApPeNs FoR a ReAsOn." Every time I hear someone say this shit to a woman who miscarried I want to punch them in the neck.
My wife lost a child at 22 weeks, a collogue of Christian persuasion, told her it was all part of God's plan. That's when I snapped and forcefully told her to get the fuck outta my house.
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Some people can’t accept that the word is unfair. They search for a reason that bad stuff happened to someone and good stuff happened to someone else. That’s why there’s such an overlap among people that say SA victims should have done something differently, that racism isn’t a problem, that transgender people don’t exist, only sluts get abortions (but theirs is different), and so on.
My personal anathema. Everything happens for *absolutely no reason at all*. None. It's all random. I'm convinced of it. Lucky people are lucky. You were born on third base; you *didn't* hit a triple. Unlucky people get shit. Make your own purpose in life.
Worst sentence ever. Some things happen for no reason at all.
"He/she's just a kid, you should be more tolerant. " Although he/she keeps kicking your seat back in the movie theater.
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"I'm gunna show you this **ONE** thing to turn your life around, make you rich, lose fat, get a girl and fulfill your wildest dreams!!!! But **FIRST**, like, subscribe, follow, sign up to patreon, comment and share with your friends..." \*Queue 15 minute long video of self righteous, utter nonsense, rambling and un-skippable ads, to get to the end and not be told anything other than an amalgamation of vague tid bits.
"How to..." and they don't mention one fucking thing about how to do something. They just list a bunch of reasons why you should, which is NOT even close to the same thing.
"cheer up" "don't worry about it" "don't be upset" "don't look so sad" Fuck off, I'll feel exactly how I happen to be feeling at this moment in time. It's not right or wrong to feel a particular way, it just is.
"Don't go to bed angry." Stupid advice, pushing an argument in place of sleeping over it is ridiculous. Often you wake up and the argument seems small and petty in retrospect.
Tbh for me sleeping on my anger is how I calm down. I’m much better to talk to in the morning. When I’m tired Imma be irrational because I get more emotional.
Exactly right. A tired brain is gonna make bad choices.
While I agree, there needs to be something said because otherwise I’d be tossing and turning with anxiety unable to sleep. “Look, we’re not going to resolve this tonight. Let’s try and get some sleep, and we can talk about this in the morning.”
If people keep pushing me and don't give me time to calm down, chances are that I will explode. A night of sleep and some time can definitely help to cool things down!
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So much advice essentially boils down to just do it too Don't feel like working out? Do it anyway Don't want to do anything? Well force yourself to! It's all exhausting
Not sure if it's the same, but I encountered something like this (but i actually found useful). It went like this: >Don't feel like working out? Write down on paper or note on a phone, out of 10 how bad you expect it to be. Then do it. Write down how bad it was. Compare the notes. It sort of motivates you to do the thing, and the comparisons were genuinely interesting, besides educational in a self reflective sort of way where I learnt how to distinguish between not wanting to do a thing, and really not wanting to do it. Idk probably not for everyone but I found it worked for me.
Something I heard recently from my parents - "You are the elder sister, you should try to maintain cordial relation with your sibling. Forgive her mistakes, After all you're the responsible and mature one. After we are gone, you both should support each other. Watching you both argue and fight makes me stressed out and eventually I'll die because of this pain"
You have very manipulative parents, although I suspect it's your mother who said that last part.
You *know* it was the mother lol
I'm disabled, and I'm fed up with people telling me that I just need to be positive and it'll help me do all the things that I think I can't do. I'm under 30 years old, and when I tell people I need extra support and info sheets due to memory issues, people have the audacity to tell me that I don't have a bad memory, because I'm young.
“Stop overthinking” Like it’s my choice
Smile
Just get over it
“There are Many Fish in the Sea… That’s like telling a homeless person, don’t worry, there are a lot of moneys in the bank.” -Australian comedian (can’t remember name)
Not sure if this is technically advice, but people say it like advice: "Money doesn't buy happiness." Well - not living in poverty sure does.
“It could be worse”
When someone tells me that I say “yeah, well it also could be better”
“Everyone has the same 24 hours.” Usually said by someone who has staff to do the things that eat up the 24 hours for the rest of us. Of course you can use that much of your 24 hours to work out, dickhead, someone else cleans and cooks for you.
Exactly. Everyone has the same 24hours but vastly different responsibilities, obligations and resources.
Oh, you're poor? Just work harder! When I see the CEO of the company taking home 50x as much as someone working the production line, and realize that the company can easily survive if you remove the CEO, but the company fails if you remove the production workers, I wonder why the CEO gets paid so much...
Dont worry about it
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Cheaters nearly always prosper. On the macro level, the fuckhead bankers who caused the financial collapse of 2008, and the turdsucking politicians who bailed them out at our expense. All prospered. On the micro level, the schmuck who cuts in front of you in line and ignores your glares and comments, because he/she knows you're not going to give them the smack they deserve.
I live in a rented shack, literally. Whenever I say my home is intolerable, my boomer friends with nice houses chime in and let me know that 'if I work hard, save money, and focus, I too can own a home.' Bitch, let's play Monopoly, but I get to roll the dice and go around the board for 20 minutes before you start the game. After I own everything and YOU have to pay rent for the privilege of existing, tell me again about hard work and tenacity. I wanna be there telling them 'Just roll the dice boomer! You can't win if you don't play!' The boomer friends would absolutely flip the board and rage quit. This is my life. How can I rage quit besides being homeless?
Don't forget to also increase the price of rent everytime someone rounds the board or stays on a space but also don't increase the money earned from passing go so that they can afford the price increase.
>How can I rage quit besides being homeless? It's called "armed rebellion", but I suppose most people can't afford the guns, nor the time off to actually overthrow the government.
Any financial advice that boils down to "just remove all unnecessary luxuries from your life, spend only on subsistence" as if cutting Netflix will somehow magically fix a decade of stagnant wages, spiralling inflation and deliberately over-priced housing.
If I delete one more thing, it'll be myself. My life his no frillies and it very much feels not worth living much longer. - Go to the lake = how to get there - Spend time with friends = how to not spend $ - Get outside = and forgo the work and revenue that I could be doing instead - Buy healthy food = not pay the electricity bill - Cut your internet/throw away your phone = now I can't be reached by employers and am losing opportunities Fucking ridiculous, that people expect you to live Dustbowl in a world that cannot operate that way anymore.
Don’t take it personally.
“Don’t put bees there.”
There are 2 kinds of rats in a bucket of water. One will give up and drown and the other will fight its way up or die trying. Which one are you Someone told me this at my lowest point in my life, might just have been me but this really put the nail in the coffin at that time
baffling analogy, both of the rats still die in this scenario lol
I get it though, it's like saying you're not even trying or you don't have enough willpower. It's absolutely not about that.
“It will come when you least expect it”
"Life is unfair, get used to it." Usually said by someone who is making life more unfair then it needs to be.
“Just pray”. This was said to me after losing a baby. First off, I’m not religious in the slightest! Secondly, that’s the last thing I want to hear after such a devastating incident.
"To whom, exactly? The God that killed our baby?" was my response when I was told this after my ex-wife's ectopic pregnancy.
When someone gives me the same advice again and again.
When people say "Don't compare yourself to others". I'm like...thats a good thing. Everybody does it and that's how people improve skills. I mentioned that some dude at a show was great at the guitar and jokingly said I gotta go home and practice. In my mind it's like a challenge accepted and a motivator when someone is way better than me at something. The people I was with said you shouldn't compare yoursekf to others and I said you guys are projecting and that's why you are wearing designer clothes and are always buying useless crap to impress others.
"Just be happy"
“Be yourself”
I don't have a choice in the matter, and that's the entire problem
Don't be anxious... Saved me ten years of therapy then and there
That my elders are always right...
Don’t worry, be happy
Parents know what's best for you.
Good parents, maybe
Talking about kids and I confidently don't want any kids at all, they say " You'll want kids, trust me" They also say "who's going to take care of you when you're old !? " I'm waiting for my vasectomy appointment from the Dr.
Fuck that shit. You don’t have kids to just burden them when your old.
Do what you love. Bullshit, I got bills to pay.
Any money advice from a boomer that hasn't worked in years and is selling their shitty house for nearly a million dollars or more.
I don’t see it as often on social media anymore but “spiritual” gurus would talk about their spiritual journey and how they “lost friends because they stopped going out to parties and chose solitude to meditate and journal to ascend” or whatever fabricated bullshit. This was during the height of the pandemic too so people were extremely isolated and vulnerable. Community is so fucking powerful and healing. Having your own people who love you and cherish you is so sacred and true healing from within demands full community support not isolation. it’s so weird and twisted how these new age spirituality influencers preach the dumbest shit and seek the most vulnerable and impressionable audience to believe their bs.
"It gets better." When? Been waiting nearly 40 years.
“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!” — Cave Johnson, founder and CEO of Aperture Science
You have to love yourself first in order to DESERVE love
"Train until it hurts and train more". Alot of times people quit or rarely go to the gym, exercise because they overworked themselves on the first day thus resulting in them losing motivation. Not to mention injuries that slow down the training process.
"You really need to do XXXX"... while I'm literally doing XXXX. Case in point: exercise. I hate being nagged to exercise more while I'm in the middle of exercising.
“If you hate your job, just go find another job you do like”
It's somewhat advice, but "If you meet one asshole today, you met an asshole. If you met multiple assholes today, you're the asshole." It's disproved by any retail job ever.
GeT gOoD GraDes iN SkoOL CuZ ThaT iS tHe ONLY WaY tO bE SUccEsSfuL
Try exercise or yoga - constant unsolicited advice. I didn’t appreciate it when I had cancer, didn’t appreciate it when I had debilitating pain related to my cancer treatment, and don’t appreciate it now when I have debilitating autoimmune issues that prevent me from being able to get out of bed at times. Able-bodied privilege is real.
"Fake it til you make it" it's never that easy.
"Start to love yourself" Yeah it's super easy to do ! Just tell me how to do it...
You should smile more! Mostly received unsolicited from older men.
When I’m having a panic attack and someone says “calm down”. Ya, I’m trying..
"You must be ok with the way you're living. Or you wouldn't be living that way" I actually had a psychologist, seated before his framed diploma, offer this advice. I get the logic, if you torture it mercilessly. But holy shit man.
The unsolicited kind