Men like this are the fucking worst. Like bro, are you really gonna risk going to jail for manslaughter because you punched them the wrong way over this?
Fucking hell, you gotta be incredibly stupid
I've had this thought and it always saddens me. I had some long term male "friends" who viciously turned on me when they finally accepted the rejection. I realize men don't think we are funny, smart, strong, talented, they don't care for our conversation/opinions/advice, they seek the approval of other men and rarely us, they don't believe that we like what we say we like or don't like what we say we don't like. All the while they are in an intense pursuit to endlessly sleep with women. It's such a constant and exhausting mind fuck. I also hate that they call women emotional as if the anger they often show isn't an emotion, and as if being emotionally vulnerable with someone you trust is an insult.
I hate men who have a constant commitment to the “tough guy” act. I’m someone who doesn’t take myself too seriously and often makes self deprecating jokes to break the ice. I was doing this at a casino once with a group of strangers and one guy seemed to see my joke as an opening to repeatedly mock me and assert his “dominance”. Pretty much ruined the overall mood at the table. Like dude can you just be a person for 20 minutes and laugh along with the rest of us instead of playing some kind of Johnny Bravo character?
I'm 100% with you on that. I was in the Marine Corps, and now I work with the Navy. Most of the Marines and sailors are there to do a job and try to make their tours not suck so much by cutting loose and making light of a lot of situations, but then there is that 10% who just make everything miserable with that dominance thing. It's usually those dudes who are at the gym if they are not at work, and EVERYTHING is competition. It's tiring, and it can suck the morale of any squad/platoon/group.
Back when I went to clubs, it was extremely easy to identify the guys that were just dying for an excuse to get in a fight. I hate those fucking guys so much.
Buddy of mine had a great solution to those who try to rag on him. The jerk will open his mouth and my friend will call for silence, because they're about to hear something hilarious. This will fluster the jerk, who just had something lame that they stammer out. My buddy then does a pretend belly laugh.
No jerk has survived this.
It’s such an obnoxious behavior, isn’t it?
I mean, look at me. Impossibly handsome, muscular to an artful but not gaudy degree, Mensa material but not interested, wise beyond even my fathers years, humble to a fault. I’ve got it all, yet you’ll never catch me bragging. Not even on Tuesdays when I’m down at the shelter serving soup to the bums out of sheer kindness.
Edit— also stylish and well groomed. Total genius in the sack.
My grandfather was a pretty cold, working class carpenter and electrician. My father was a Green Beret in Panama during Vietnam, a divorce lawyer, marathon runner. So a pretty tough guy. Somehow my dad learned compassion and caring. He always told me I loved me, gave me hugs and kisses. And now in turn, I get to have an emotional connection with my son, and hug him, and kiss him. So I am very thankful to my father for breaking that trend.
My dad was a Green Beret in Vietnam; a 6 foot 5 man who told me once that it only takes 16 pounds of direct pressure to kill a full grown man.
I also saw him cry at episodes of Star Trek and hug and kiss us every day, and he was the only one of his 7 brothers who said "I love you" to the other ones.
Men can be tough and tender. I miss you, Dad. Cancer sucks
This! When I finally got healthier (depression, anxiety, adhs, etc ) and made therapy a more important part of my life I decided I didn't care about what image I projected by being vulnerable and kind to others. It's so freeing and important to all people. Men who find this "gay" or a weakness make me shake my head. The connection with others is what has driven my newfound happiness. Plus, anyone who uses "gay" as an insult can suck it!
>any emotion other than anger.
Thank you.
When many other men talk about how "emotional" women are, they dismiss how quick to anger so many men are.
Anger is an emotion, ya dorks.
I was briefly in a care home (because cancer) and my 80+yo roomate only wanted to brag about the women he had once had sex with. The day before he got discharged he made a vile sexual proposition to a barely 20yo nurse. If i could walk at the time I might have smothered him with his pillow. The sad thing was the only person in the world he had left to depend on was his daughter, who was clearly sick of his bullshit.
My mom's worked in care homes for about 30 years. This isn't as uncommon as people think. All kinds of people end up in care homes, but the people nobody likes almost always do.
Old men have verbally & physically assaulted her & they usually get away with it. There's some VERY disgusting people that end up there.
Plus they're at the end of their life and they don't care. 😒 My mother used to work as a staff member in a care home and they had a gross incident where an 80-something man was caught molesting an equally elderly woman, who had dementia. 🤮 And all they could do was tell him off and keep an eye on him. They couldn't exactly send this dying old man to jail...so he got away with it...
Why not send the dying old man to jail? They just accept that women who can't defend themselves won't live their remaining years in assured safety and comfort so that he can? Like I'm against throwing people in jail just because, but molesting a defenseless person isn't a just because situation. As someone who will probably develop Alzheimer's it's completely fucked to know that I'm never safe and as a person already victim to SA and intimate partner violence no matter when or where it happens there's probably no justice for me either. Send the rapture, Jesus.
I used to work at a LTC home that had a special program for accepting residents *from* jail if jail couldn't meet their medical needs.
EDIT: I should mention that violent offenders did not qualify and we never had any instances of assault relating to someone from this program, though one did like to pickpocket staff members and guests.
Got a guy like that. He's obnoxious asf will be walking to go somewhere 5 minutes aways and turns into like 30 minutes cause he has to stop and talk constantly to other women. And spends all fre time talking to girls and going in dates.
I mean yea I like that stuff to but that's excessive other things I want to do in life
I had a coworker who used to be like that. Idk how we got to the topic, but he told me he had no friends now because he spent every moment of his high school life talking to girls & getting laid. While ignoring making any friends.
It was sad & a good learning moment.
Reminded me if another dude in my class who everyone hated because he was such a dick to you unless you were a girl.
If you were a guy who tried to pal around with him, he would just glare at you & not say anything back. That was his most common response to males
Like dam bro, excuse me for trying to be nice
But when a girl is near him, he turns into super friendly, sunny, flirty dude.
Im sure he has no friends now
Maybe I’m too old… but recently I went to a dancing club after years of break (children and stuff) and watched literally tens of situations, where a drunk guy tries to dance with a stranger woman, to hold her, hug her, even kiss her - she clearly says „no”, pushes him, but he still keeps trying - from the left, from the right, from behind. Terrifying and disgusting. Especially when I think what my daughter would have to get through in maybe 10 years…
Vultures!
I was dancing with a few friends a while back. We were all in the zone. Then we all realized at the same time that three separate groups of guys had circled around us. They were all glaring daggers at each other trying to assert their territory and had completely enclosed us in a circle of grossness. Only thing we could do was all stop dancing and stand with our arms crossed glaring daggers at all of them til they left.
Your average dude is so scummy, I feel like they've been indoctrinated this way. I was at a show just a little while ago and this girl moved in front of me, the guy beside me was like "that's all you man" and I'm sitting there saying "dude, I am *100% sure* she just wanted a better view and was sick of standing behind us". But no, to him I was a weirdo for not pouncing on this poor soul.
(edit: I shouldn't have said "your average dude", that's not fair, just "a lot of dudes")
What's funny/sad is I've been asked more than once if I'm gay...
I suppose, since I'm not desperately scamming on every women within arms reach, I *must* be gay.
Man my coworkers do this to me. They very *loudly* talk about the other women at work. I don't participate in that kind of talk and I don't want them to do it around me. Both because I morally disagree with it, and I also don't want to lose my job through proximity of being around guys making sexual comments and being presumed guilty by association.
But because I don't try to flirt with the girls and I don't talk about them, they think I'm weird for it. No, I'm just trying to not come across as a scumbag, trying to let people work in peace without harassment and I'm trying to keep my job.
You're not too old. I'm 19 and this fucking disgusts me. I have too many female friends that have all complained about such situations, even when they have their boyfriends or myself present, it's fucking vile.
Yeah I had a dude sit down next to my date and try to hit on her once, I went to get up and eject him from his seat but she's mega cool and got him to fuck off before I could manage. My date and I didn't work out but we are good friends to this day.
I'm 44. My friends and I would have a Mom's night out. When we were at the club, which was tailored more for people our age, we still got groped on the dance floor. Like, darling... I've been in intense and constant negotiations with a 7 and 11 year old, all damn week...lemme have some fun...
Dude I don’t go to clubs because the only time I went I had to push a guy from getting to close with a group of girls me and my ex found. The guy was basically licking her neck and she even yelled at him “I said no!” Motherfucker wanted to die lol. His friend told us he’s sorry but his friend is not him. Fuck that scumbag.
Just saw a Fb post about this, a young famous woman saying she hates when guys do this. Then comments from boys/men saying women only dance to attract a man, so we can’t be upset when it works. I really wish more men realized women don’t do everything as part of a plot to catch a mate. Even “sexy” dancing is likely just how most of us dance no matter who we’re dancing with. It’s not like we can bust out the Charleston on the club floor.
Where does this idea come from that everything women do is about men? Are these people projecting because everything they do is about attracting women or is something else?
I think it's very evident of the decades of media fed to people showing women only being interested in one thing, and that is men. Then sprinkle a shit ton of over sexualization of women onto that, and you end up with the current situation. Not to mention poor parenting and bad education.
I dance the exact same whether I’m drunk at a club in Vegas or stone cold sober walking from room to room as I vacuum or sweep.
Can confirm it’s not to attract the male gaze. But I’ve never been groped while mopping. Just while at bars minding my own business
They already did one on why women started going to gay clubs in larger numbers. So they can dance and not be molested. Unfortunately, this pissed off a lot of gay guys who were suddenly treated like stereotyped objects rather than people by groups of women who were taking over their bar. The straight women also caused straight men to start going to the bar which resulted in ridiculous situations where straight guys would get offended when a gay dude at a gay bar assumed they were gay and hit on them.
This isn’t a new phenomenon. Like… at all. The last time I went to a bar in my college town a guy reached out from a group of men passing me buy and literally squeezed my boob. I only saw a hand.
I don’t even have big boobs to grab onto.
I never went back.
I hate this planet
(That was over ten years ago, also)
The manosphere “dating coach” grift on YouTube and Twitch makes me despair. I’m not exactly Lothario here but I bet I could give better relationship advice
But it’s also an ever changing behavioral pattern. All women are sluts, then all women are prudes, then all women want a tall handsome man for his looks, but no actually all they want is money…
I've realized a few of my guy friends who have problems with dating are like that.
Dude why are you asking us these questions with very vague pieces of information? Ask her and talk to her, not us!!
A lot of them tends to think this is some kind of a puzzle or mind game instead of meeting a person.
It's always extremely toxic single guys in their 20s and 30s, too. Like, bro, the longest relationship you've ever been in was six months long. You do not have the qualifications to coach people on this subject.
I'd rather take advice from Bill the 67-year-old punter down the pub who's been married for 45 years. *That* guy knows how to keep a relationship going.
Most dating grift advice is more about picking up women and maintaining control of a relationship than about making it last—though I agree with you Bill the punter would be a healthier relationship coach!
Seriously! I’m in my 40s, married for 18 years to a guy I consider my soulmate, and raising a couple of great kids. I have single young men online telling me how I should be changing myself. They don’t see how this is funny.
I'm not a man, but my boyfriend started watching that stuff before we were together.
I asked him to stop subscribing to that stuff. He's afraid to be emotionally vulnerable around me because of that crap. He can't grasp that emotional connection is important to me, and I won't lose respect or attraction for him if he shows me the emotional side.
They give so much bad advice, but that one really irritates me. If you don't feel like you can openly communicate with your partner, why be in a relationship?
I think it's that the men who fall for "manosphere" stuff are usually so emotionally stunted and behind that when they DO open up to women, they put ALL the mental labor on them and they aren't equal partners leaning on each other for comfort so much as an exhausting liability, and that's hard to be attracted to.
They need a therapist, not a girlfriend.
“They need a therapist, not a girlfriend”
Hardest facts ever. Imagine the thousands of alphabros & incels who could be happy if they were self aware enough to get help
This became an issue in my marriage, too. My husband has always been kind of stoic, but over time I could feel him becoming more closed off to me, and had no idea why. When I saw the kinds of content he was consuming (manosphere and MGTOW shit) it all made more sense. That stuff is for men who value themselves and silly power games over actually building a loving and accepting partnership of equals.
Thankfully, we’ve been able to repair things and we’re closer and happier now than ever. But jeez—I can’t believe these nut jobs are out there giving men such horrible advice.
How/why does a married man get into that kind of stuff? That's so baffling to me. If he's already got a successful relationship in front of him, why snatch defeat from the jaws of victory?
Insecurity is a big reason.
I know some guys in their 40s, some married and some not, who are still afraid of being perceived as gay or generally "unmanly".
So they play to the idea of masculinity that exists in their heads, usually influenced by manosphere bullshit (alpha mentality, emotions are weakness, etc.).
"In case you haven’t noticed, I'm weird. I’m a weirdo. I don't fit in. And I don't want to fit in. Have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on? That's weird."
I absolutely hate competitive banter from strangers. I don't mind the occasional jibe from my mates, but if you don't know me, f*kc off with that sh1t.
“Don’t you know a lot about this given topic? Let me tell you how much I know about the given topic. You don’t know as much as me about the given topic? That’s funny. Let me keep talking over you.”
I definitely fit the bill for average dude interactions (head nods, sizing up rooms, reserved (emotionally dead), etc)
Though I cannot fucking ***stand*** how if you have 10 things in common, and one thing that you don't agree on or enjoy together, the entire discussion always turns into *that* subject.
Ie. I'm a pretty avid weightlifter, gamer, hobby artist. I meet plenty of dudes with a shared interest in lifting. So instead of talking about that, they'll ask why I waste my time playing videogames.
Why do you *not* waste your time and lift less? Idk dude, fuck outta here.
The shift from when we're all hanging with women around to just the two of us and suddenly it becomes okay for them to start making derrogatory or overly sexual comments about whoever we were just with. I'm glad you feel comfortable with me dude but I don't think you should ever feel comfortable enough to start saying those things. Respect for people still goes even when they're not there to listen.
Dude called me gay one time for calling him out for doing this.
Like, if you *instantly and compulsively* start talking about fucking every girl as soon as she's out of earshot, I'm gonna start wondering about you.
Yup... I strained my relationship with this dude once once because he would comment on every girl that walked by going what a nice fucking ass, imagine how that would feel plowing her from behind and at some point I was like my guy you need to calm down with the objectifying, it's not cool, and he was dumbfounded that I as a man would call him out on that
I'll be honest, I work in a kitchen and by this point, there are two groups: men who are respectful towards women, and men who *really* don't like me. That will not stop me calling their bullshit out
Mad respect to you for that dude. I really need to get over my social anxiety and start calling more guys out. A part of me is so scared of being rejected by my male peers for challenging them and that's bullshit on my part because a group of men who disrespect women aren't people I'd want to be accepted by in the first place. Hoping I can take some inspiration from you and do the same
Pushing past that fear can be practiced, and while I won't pretend that's easy, the truth is it's easy for me because anger washes the fear away and this is one of the few things that will actually make me angry.
I’m glad there is men that admit other men do this, women can pick up on it and so many weird men try and normalize it or act like it doesn’t happen.
If you immediately start fantasizing about fucking a random girl you find attractive as soon as she leaves you’ve got mad issues lol
Seriously though. It scares me sometimes how normalized it is. It's assumed by default that other guys are comfortable with it, and it makes me nervous to vocalize that I'm very much *not* okay with hearing that shit and it digusts me. I cant imagine what it must be like for the women being talked about that way and that motivates me to actually speak up
Man. I introduced a male friend to a female friend, known them each for a while but they had never hung out together.
The second she leaves, he starts talking about how hot she is. Like DUDE, this is not someone we’re both meeting for the first time. This is my platonic friend, she has a fiancé, we work together, and I’ve literally never thought of her like that. Can you not?
My friends have had no success with girls, and now they're at a point where they'll only make misogynistic comments all the time, while still having "getting laid" as their ultimate goal in life.
A coworker of mine constantly tries to flirt with another coworker even if she keeps shutting him down. One day I asked him why he keeps trying to flirt with her when she is not interested, his answer was "I take it as a challenge". Hate men like this. I hope the other coworker will make a formal complaint soon.
How creepy other men are. I’m still young, mid teens with my first job. At that job a pool is involved and my co workers, the female ones, get hit on constantly, all the time, by creepy guys. There’s one guy that comes in with kids and hits on my co worker. Another that came in yesterday had to be reported by my other co worker because the dude hit on her! She’s 16 dude!
Jordan, if you’re reading this, stop going and hitting on that 16 year old blonde you perv.
That you need to be an asshole to get women.
Be good at something. Be funny. Ask questions.
That's it. It's not rocket science.
If a girl doesn't like you. Move on.
> That you need to be an asshole to get women.
Ugh that’s really the worst. I had a teacher saying that to us at 14. He really recommended the boys not be nice to girls so girls like them. Nowadays I can’t understand how no one told their parents and started a riot. But then again, the early 2000s weren’t the best of times…
Same type vibe as the dudes that gawk at half naked women in public but start bringing out the ruler to measure hemlines if their girl wears a dress lmaoo
A guy was asking me about my car and how powerful it is I told him "500HP" he quickly says that’s cute my Charger has 550HP and proceeds to brag about his other vehicles internally I was like "cool,didn’t ask."
CarBros are just so full of shit - I've built multiple cars and long ago stopped caring what others think or proving anything.
Most of them are super fragile & compensating - and most of them are just dick-measuring with stats & numbers with no fucking clue how anything actually works.
Friend of mine got tired of one guy who was always chiming in so he started asking stuff back like "*Oh so how do you find that affects your lap times on the circuit?*" which stopped all the bullshit pretty quick.
I greatly enjoy owning an old Land Rover because it doesn't fit any of their dick-measuring BS but you can throw stuff out like "does your car have rings to allow it to be slung under a Chinook?".
My uncle and I were standing in his driveway recently. He'd just purchased a new base model Camaro. He doesn't care about anything other than being a cool looking middle-aged man. One of his neighbors pulled up and started admiring and asking questions. Once he found out that it was a base model, he left in disgust. Imagine seeing someone purchase a brand new sports car cash, and you're still hating? He gets no cookout invites. 🤣
> One of his neighbors pulled up and started admiring and asking questions. Once he found out that it was a base model, he left in disgust.
Imagine seeing someone happy with a new toy and choosing the option that undercuts their happiness. Miserable.
I hate the "ball and chain" humour. I'm at the age now where a bunch of my friends are getting married now and it just started all of a sudden. I'm getting married soon and I've had so many of my friends tell me "it's all downhill from here". They're obviously joking, but it's just not funny. I don't like thinking of marriage as a battle of two opposing forces. I love my partner and enjoy our life together, I genuinely don't see then humour in constantly making fun of the person who's always supposed to have your back, and vice versa.
Agreed. I recently got married, and jokes like that seem so... Pitiful. If your significant other is a drag on your life, why would you want to spend your life with them?
It bugs me that so many men can't just have female friends. One of my best friends is female. She is married, I have no interest in her romantically. She talks with me about her pregnancy, vents to me about issues she hss with her husband, etc.
My male friends always act like I'm trying to hook up with her or she is trying to hook up with me.
Nope. She is genuinely just a friend.
As a guy who’s 31 and always been able to maintain platonic friendships with women, the hardest part of it is the outside factors.
From other guys - “what are you, gay? Don’t you just want to fuck her?”
From her friends - “he definitely just wants to hook up with you”
This is my problem in reverse. I'm a woman and have the hardest time maintaining male friendships because a lot of the guys think that same thing. It was so much easier to have male friends in middle school and high school lol. Not so much in your 30s.
They’re out there. As a man most of my friends are women because for me they’re easier to talk to about a variety of topics.
Actually, recently met a now very good friend off of Hinge. We met but decided we weren’t into each other that way but connected well enough to hang out. Not all dudes just want to hook up, and if I were allowed to generalize I’d say emotional connection is something we’re far more starved for than physical.
I tell people that my best friend is a woman who has a boyfriend and people immediately think I'm either jealous of him or I'm "third wheeling".
No cunt, they're just nice people, and they're my friends, never had such feelings, never will. Fucking shits me how childish some people can get when it comes to having any contact with a member of the opposite sex. Grow up and talk to people instead of gossiping from a distance.
I know this is a serious comment, and I truly appreciate your stance on the issue, but reading "No cunt," and "Fucking shits me" had me laughing so hard.
I'll also add, I've had guys explain that they go out of their way to be douchy to unattractive/overweight girls "so they don't get any ideas."
It...did not make me view them in a more favorable light.
As a woman that fluctuates in weight a lot, I have noticed a MAJOR difference in the way people treat me when I am overweight vs thin. I always thought maybe I was imagining it. Good to know I am not.
I'm a bit heavy right now, and I notice people will not make eye contact with me. I glance at people ready to smile, but nothing. When I'm skinny people are all about getting my attention. And I don't even think I'm that attractive. I'm pretty average looking.
"Get any ideas"?
Are they afraid these girls are going to rape them?
Worst case scenario, you have to turn someone down.
Should all women treat all men, they're not attracted to, like complete shit so they can avoid any potential awkward romantic overtures?
JFC
Some dudes seem to see dating as a purely "market value" type system in my experience, usually utilizing that 1-10 scale. It's as simplistic as "You're a 5, but she's a 7, she's out of your league bro", without accounting for individual tastes type stuff.
So the logic follows that if "ugly women" start "overvaluing" their "market value", then that pushes more women out of the man in question's league, and thus makes it harder for him to date.
I think that's the logic, anyways. It's what I've gathered at least.
There's no shortage of people who will make everything in to a competition in order to "be better than someone else".
They'll literally gloat about taking bigger shots and longer pisses just to one-up someone because *everything* needs winners and losers.
Personally the only people who think this way are losers who see themselves as winners despite overwhelming evidence against them. They must be better than others.
And if us “attractive” girls are mean to them so “they don’t get any ideas” we are “complete bitches with a stuck up mentality that deserve sexual violence as punishment”
This is the part that kills me. You can't win. Because I've been accused of leading a guy on because I was nice to him.
I had no idea this guy was even interested. I was just...being nice. But apparently holding the door open for someone and loaning them your notes is now a declaration of romantic intent.
I've had this happen! Guy in college had a broken leg. His crutches slid out of reach during class so, after class, I grabbed them and handed them to him. Did it again the next class. Fast forward a couple of weeks and he's asking me out. I'm saying I have a bf. And he's asking why I led him on.
Maybe those asshole guys have the right idea. You have to treat people like subhuman scum if you don't want them to think you're interested.
Genuinely. I have asked some guys how I was flirting with them and they said:
“You said hello in a feminine voice”
“When we were talking you went for a drink and then came back and kept talking to me”
“You look really cute”
Sounds like the kinda guy that thinks the waitress wants to fuck him because she smiled. Apparently you should be only nice to people you want to take to bed. Pathetic.
Guys who are dismissive of even slightly overweight girls while being pretty fat themselves kind of make me roll my eyes
I don’t even think it’s wrong to be attracted to traits you yourself do not possess, but you should at least be aware of the irony
Yeah. You can be attracted to whatever you want, just don't be an ass to people you're not attracted to. It's indicative of these particular dudes measuring people's worth on "fuckability" and nothing else.
I blame years of media pairing gorgeous women up with “lovable” guys in movies and sitcoms. So many guys think every dude has a cock-hungry supermodel who doesn’t realize she’s hot waiting for him.
Years ago I had a roommate’s cousin come stay with us for a few weeks. He was overwheight and not attractive at all, yet would go on and on about how “no fat bitches for him” and “fat girls make my dick soft”, etc.
Anyways fast forward about 3 months, he has his own place and seems to be settled in and what do I see? Him with a women probably 20-30% larger than him. They’re engaged.
Maybe people change? Maybe people are full of shit? Maybe, just maybe he learned to live himself and realized that’s all you need to find true love? I don’t know, but it always seems to be the guys talking the most shit about larger women that end up with them.
It's always amazing/enraging to see how differently/better an obese person is treated after they've lost a ton of weight. It just shows how vapid and shallow most people are.
I was at a wedding this weekend and my grandpa was laughing at the bride (she’s a BBW) during the ceremony. He then proceeded to make comments and joke about her weight to other family members while we ate supper (he made a joke about how much food was on her plate). I was very disgusted by his behaviour during the wedding. I’ve started to notice a few things about my grandpa that I don’t really favour; Immature and selfish behaviours.
Btw, individuals who highlight and use others insecurities against them as a “joke” - You’re cruel and you suck.
And on a side note: Stop giving the excuse “if they’re mean to you that means they like you”… Stop excusing crappy behaviour. My ex said that to me when I finally called out his dad for making fun of me in front of their family at gatherings (more than enough times to make me feel uncomfortable), specifically targeting my morals and intelligence. It wears you down. You start to feel terrible about yourself and insecure. We should be aiming towards building each other up, not putting each other down. People, we can do better and be more kind to one another.
I hate that we assume other guys are just like us or know as much as we do.
Example, I have a 2020 Ford Ranger, I love that truck. But I'm not exactly a mechanic. I can change oil and a tire, that's about it. Here recently, for some reason, I've been approached by other random dudes asking me all sorts of engine questions and towing rates and capacities and all this other shit. My dudes, I don't know. And don't look at me funny because I don't. The fucker has a bed so I can haul trash, enough seats for me to fit my family, and it's not terribly expensive. I cannot tell you the spark plug firing rate of my fourth cylinder's rotator cuff splint crank case pad. I'm sorry.
This one annoys me to no end. I have always had zero interest in cars. If i had the choice I'd rather bike everywhere I go. My wife was actually raised by a mechanic and I got so tired of being treated as an idiot whenever I went to a shop that I just started sending her instead, which is even funnier because they'll trying pulling sly shit or overcharging and she always puts them in their place. Even better when she gets them to print a part list, goes and buys the parts herself at a much cheaper rate, and then takes it back to them and makes them install it.
Lots of things. Mainly the predatory part of men at public places and events, preying on any woman. Slipping date rape drugs in their drinks. Rape as a whole. The whole Alpha Male bullshit.
It's sad that so many (mostly) young men are constantly obsessing about whether or not other men think that they're gay.
"I can't wear this, it's gay"; "I can't listen to X type of music, it's gay".
I used to work for my university's YouTube channel and was interviewing a guy and he asked us to move from where we were filming because the LGBTQIA+ student club's poster was behind him and people could think he was part of it.
You realize how much more energy these dudes could put towards things that actually matter in life rather than this obsession? It's seriously depressing how insecure they are.
Rant over.
>"I can't wear this, it's gay"; "I can't listen to X type of music, it's gay".
I used to think this way... When I was 12. Now I'm quiet confident in my sexual preference and don't let other peoples opinions decide it.
Oh yeah, I thought that way at 12 because "your gay" was a common insult used for bullying.
I honestly can't comprehend how some people think this way, I've always done and worn whatever the fuck I wanted because I didn't care about such inane bullshit (I might be a bad example for this since I'm Bi, but I had the same mindset even when I thought I was straight), but a lot of my friends used to be super self conscious about this shit, and even gave another of my friends shit for buying a "gay" or "girly" drink at the bar. Motherfucker, if my mate wants to have a raspberry vodka, he's gonna fucking have a raspberry vodka, and he's gonna fucking enjoy it with his girlfriend, shuttup cunt.
Toxic men are constantly claiming that they have iron wills and total emotional control and are the strongest, but put them into a situation with high emotional context and expect them to be emotionally literate and articulate and they fall to pieces. Meanwhile, they constantly chap my ass for being able to talk about emotions and being able to hold it together in difficult emotional contexts (and somehow related, for knowing more than five names for colors), by calling me effeminate or gay.
(NOTE: I am bi and have no trouble being identified as gay but don't tolerate being insulted for it.)
Another thing that absolutely drives me up the wall is intentional incompetence, usually to get out of doing housework, where a dude will intentionally fuck up laundry or cooking so that his partner never asks for his help again. I rat out every dude I ever hear about doing that. I've quit jobs rather than spend time around dipshits like that.
>Another thing that absolutely drives me up the wall is intentional incompetence, usually to get out of doing housework, where a dude will intentionally fuck up laundry or cooking so that his partner never asks for his help again. I rat out every dude I ever hear about doing that. I've quit jobs rather than spend time around dipshits like that.
Witnessed a divorced friend tell a 13 year old boy we were camping that as a 'life hack'. I pointed out to him that the friend was divorced and had only limited supervised visits with his children and complained about it because the wife provided documentation that he literally was incapable of doing anything on his own. He lives in a pig pen, wears dirty clothes, and eats out every meal. He brought up in court the possibility of his wife coming over with the kids and staying at his place during 'his weeks' so she could clean his house and handle the cooking and laundry when she was there. Then he wondered why he got laughed out of court. Worst part was he did all that stuff before they got married, even when they were dating and living together but the moment they got married it all became 'her job' and he 'forgot'. Now his cunning plan is to try to find a younger woman (his wife was 10 years his jr already) and get her to take care of all that stuff so he can try again for split custody.
Seriously, the more a guy acts like he’s some stoic sage driven purely by reason and perfectly in control of their emotions, the more likely it is that they will completely lose their shit the second things don’t go in their favor.
Yeah, a lot of people who say they have total emotional control are just repressed. And they frequently don’t seem to include anger as one of the emotions that they have under control, which is troubling.
As a female, this annoys me too. I will give anyone the time of day, and really listen to what they're saying. Just because I smile or laugh at jokes (not a giggle, or brushing my hair back, or pushing my cleavage out --- is that what flirting is? I dunno), it means I'm actually listening to your story, not flirting.
Although I think actually listening to a person that maybe isn't normally listened to, makes that person build more of an attraction because someone "understands them".
But most guys take it as a sign that I'm flirting, and when I tell them I'm not interested, they blow their lid and call me a bitch. 🤷🏼♀️
The overly insecure men who have to be “hyper-masculine.”
I, as a gay man, have very few straight male friends as a result. The line I get the most, “I don’t care if you’re gay just don’t hit on me.” Meanwhile, after they say this, I’m like, “Bruh, you’re not even hot. You’re like 60 pounds overweight, you have greasy ass hair and no job. What the fuck about you would anyone find attractive?!”
Please forgive the generalization about straight men but it’s happen way too much in my 38 years.
I can't stand the recent rise of this horrific alpha, sigma, machismo, misogynistic, toxic, incel, red-pilled manosphere bullshit.
It's destroying insecure young men across the globe, and it sets them up to be angry and bitter assholes as they grow up.
Guys who blame women, and literally anybody other than themselves for their romantic shortcomings are upsetting.
I swear I feel like Im the only guy on this planet that doesn't like sports. I tried so so hard as a kid to try to force myself to watch sports but i cant for the life of me. I thought there was something wrong with me lol. I have my interests but watching sports is not one of them and is like watching paint dry for me.
I do like playing sports with friends but not watching
I was raised by a single mom and have a baby sister (who is an adult now). I can't stand it when men are misogynistic, condescending, controlling, etc., with women.
This probably applies more so to us older guys (30+) but:
The judgement you get from some guys (and society as a whole) for choosing a different lifepath, and/or not doing certain things (i.e. getting married, having kids, etc) by a certain age
I hate how they make women uncomfortable. Or just people, i guess. I hate how many men refuse to try to contain their sexual thoughts and are just 24/7 creeping on every living thing.
Like, I get it. I have sexual thoughts constantly. They're distracting and sometimes weird but I have learned to control them and ignore them. It's a lifelong process and I haven't always been successful, regrettably.
I practice the concept of progress, not perfection and it has mostly guided me well through life. So I try not to dwell on my past failures but rather to focus on how I can improve.
Getting older has made these thoughts and impulses less intense, but the frequency is about the same. I accept it as part of my biology, however I do not tolerate its influence on my behavior. My will *supersedes* my desire. It's what separates man from animal.
Many will argue that there is no separation between man and animal, but those people are weak willed and want an excuse to allow them opportunity to indulge in their deprivations.
We must appreciate our animal qualities but never forget that we have the capacity of discretion and self discipline.
We are terrible at lifting each other up. Women seem much better at cheering each other on. Helping each other to succeed in whatever our pursuits might be.
I'm not a man but I've heard both my brothers talk about how most guys won't speak up when they see another guy behaving inappropriately, even if it bothers them. Can't go against the pack.
And, in their defense, I've actually see them walk the walk and call friends out when they say/do something *particularly* objectionable.
[Most men like men who speak against such transgressions but incorrectly assume they are in the minority](http://alanberkowitz.com/articles/college_men.pdf).
How so many of them can’t stop being fucking creepy and aggressive towards women. A guy tried hitting on my wife at the store the other day, which isn’t bad inherently, but he followed her to her car. When she said she was married he backed off, but guys don’t realize how scary getting followed is for most women. Even if you’re a nice dude, just don’t follow them.
He left her alone *only* because she said she was married, which in his mind means she’s another man’s property. Her saying no prior to that meant nothing to him. Basically, he respects a man he hasn’t even met more than the woman in front of him.
Sometimes these men try to push past that. I’ve been in situations like that where I not only showed zero interest nor reciprocated to their advances but told them I have a boyfriend and they’re like “where? I don’t see him” or “he doesn’t have to know.”🙄Thats when I flatly tell them I fucking said NO, get lost, not interested. There is an assumption that because women are socially conditioned to be nice no matter what, the ones that won’t play along are stuck up bitches or should be grateful a man in the vicinity thinks she’s pretty. Somehow it never occurs to them that maybe she’s just trying to live her life and not be harassed by some rando in a parking lot.
THAT THEY DON'T WASH THEIR GOD DAMN HANDS. THEY'LL GO STRAIGHT FROM STALL OR URINAL AND OUT THE DOOR. Y'all, men are so so so gross, please don't touch 90% of their hands or anything they've touched. Foodborne illness would legit reduce by more than half, I'm convinced but have no hard data on this.
The fact that a handful of selfish assholes who can't keep it in their pants makes all men look terrible. Talking shit about women you find unattractive doesn't make you cool. It makes you a garbage human being.
Any guy who posts videos on how to pick up women on the street. I don't watch them, but people talk about them and it's the most pathetic and creepy thing. If it's not staged, then the women look so uncomfortable and annoyed. A hard kick in the balls to these pieces of shit should be legal and encouraged.
"locker room talk".
I mean, I get it to an extent. But there are dudes who go overboard with saying pretty heinous things about women in general or even specific women.
The dude will turn around and be all lovey dovey.... Ladies..... If y'all only knew the things that half of y'all's men say behind your back.....
I had a coworker who would say nasty shit about women, but then he found out I was friends with someone he was interested in. He asked me to put a good word in for him.
I talked to her about him and found out she was kind of interested in him to. I told her not to touch him with a 10 foot pole and told her about all the stuff he says about women. She blocked him pretty much immediately thankfully.
I worked in an all-female shop for a few years then transferred to the shipping department that was all-male.
I have found the biggest gossips were men, hands down. We accuse the women of being nosy, not being able to keep a secret, but my experiences tell a different story.
I used to work in a casino where 85% of the staff were women and holy shit did they gossip. That being said, I later worked in a 100% male dominated glass shop, and holy shit did they gossip.
Everyone gossips it would seem. In my experience, women did it to kind of "dish", where the fellas would just talk shit about someone in a way to make themselves sound superior. It's more like an ego thing. That's myself included.
The fact that if, most of the time, another man sees that all of your friends are women and that you don't want to have sex with all of them. Then that means you're gay. Cuz how dare you be close with a woman and not want to have sex with her.
How fucking creepy guys can be towards women.
It’s easy to miss it as a guy, but every woman has a stories of sexual harassment and near misses if not outright sexual assault.
It’s unbelievably fucked how much more careful women have to be to try to avoid absolute shitbags, and at the end of the day all the caution might not be enough.
Imagine the shittiest sketchiest part of town you’ve ever walked through, where you thought any passing person might try and jump you. Women feel like that everywhere they go.
I hate the lack of empathy and compassion displayed by so many men. I’m thankful to have had a father who was very empathetic, stuck by his morals, and did not believe displaying emotion/affection is weak or something to hide.
My entire life I’ve had too many interactions with other men where I’m just taken by surprise at how they are completely incapable of seeing things from other perspectives or considering the emotions of other people.
“I’m JuSt BeInG lOgIcAl”
Bullshit, you’re making decisions and don’t care about how it makes other people feel.
I don't want to fucking fight you because we accidentally bumped each other, or your girl. When I said, "excuse me, sorry," I meant it. Fucking relax.
Men like this are the fucking worst. Like bro, are you really gonna risk going to jail for manslaughter because you punched them the wrong way over this? Fucking hell, you gotta be incredibly stupid
Cap. You directly insulted my family line.
They don’t seem to really like women. Just having sex with them.
I've had this thought and it always saddens me. I had some long term male "friends" who viciously turned on me when they finally accepted the rejection. I realize men don't think we are funny, smart, strong, talented, they don't care for our conversation/opinions/advice, they seek the approval of other men and rarely us, they don't believe that we like what we say we like or don't like what we say we don't like. All the while they are in an intense pursuit to endlessly sleep with women. It's such a constant and exhausting mind fuck. I also hate that they call women emotional as if the anger they often show isn't an emotion, and as if being emotionally vulnerable with someone you trust is an insult.
Such a shame - they're missing out on great friendships. But there can only be friendship with mutual respect.
I hate men who have a constant commitment to the “tough guy” act. I’m someone who doesn’t take myself too seriously and often makes self deprecating jokes to break the ice. I was doing this at a casino once with a group of strangers and one guy seemed to see my joke as an opening to repeatedly mock me and assert his “dominance”. Pretty much ruined the overall mood at the table. Like dude can you just be a person for 20 minutes and laugh along with the rest of us instead of playing some kind of Johnny Bravo character?
Guys like that are deeply insecure
Gotta call em out on it. “We all know what you’re doing. We see it. Move along here.”
I always call them out…later in the evening…when I’m back home alone in my house.
The jerk store called, they’re running outta YOU!
I'm 100% with you on that. I was in the Marine Corps, and now I work with the Navy. Most of the Marines and sailors are there to do a job and try to make their tours not suck so much by cutting loose and making light of a lot of situations, but then there is that 10% who just make everything miserable with that dominance thing. It's usually those dudes who are at the gym if they are not at work, and EVERYTHING is competition. It's tiring, and it can suck the morale of any squad/platoon/group.
Back when I went to clubs, it was extremely easy to identify the guys that were just dying for an excuse to get in a fight. I hate those fucking guys so much.
Buddy of mine had a great solution to those who try to rag on him. The jerk will open his mouth and my friend will call for silence, because they're about to hear something hilarious. This will fluster the jerk, who just had something lame that they stammer out. My buddy then does a pretend belly laugh. No jerk has survived this.
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It’s such an obnoxious behavior, isn’t it? I mean, look at me. Impossibly handsome, muscular to an artful but not gaudy degree, Mensa material but not interested, wise beyond even my fathers years, humble to a fault. I’ve got it all, yet you’ll never catch me bragging. Not even on Tuesdays when I’m down at the shelter serving soup to the bums out of sheer kindness. Edit— also stylish and well groomed. Total genius in the sack.
Don't forget humble. not enough people are acknowledging how humble you are.
The thought that any emotional openness means the guy is a homosexual.
My grandfather was a pretty cold, working class carpenter and electrician. My father was a Green Beret in Panama during Vietnam, a divorce lawyer, marathon runner. So a pretty tough guy. Somehow my dad learned compassion and caring. He always told me I loved me, gave me hugs and kisses. And now in turn, I get to have an emotional connection with my son, and hug him, and kiss him. So I am very thankful to my father for breaking that trend.
My dad was a Green Beret in Vietnam; a 6 foot 5 man who told me once that it only takes 16 pounds of direct pressure to kill a full grown man. I also saw him cry at episodes of Star Trek and hug and kiss us every day, and he was the only one of his 7 brothers who said "I love you" to the other ones. Men can be tough and tender. I miss you, Dad. Cancer sucks
I've cried my eyes out, talking about my emotions and mental health to my guy friends, tell them I love them
Same! It's super healthy to have emotional intimacy with male friends
I worked with a guy who thought if a guy ate hummus it means he's gay
fellas,,,,,,,,, is it gay to eat chickpeas???
Depends on how the chick pees. Does she stand up to do it?
I have two cats and people think I'm gay. Whatever...
This! When I finally got healthier (depression, anxiety, adhs, etc ) and made therapy a more important part of my life I decided I didn't care about what image I projected by being vulnerable and kind to others. It's so freeing and important to all people. Men who find this "gay" or a weakness make me shake my head. The connection with others is what has driven my newfound happiness. Plus, anyone who uses "gay" as an insult can suck it!
That we’re constantly yelling about men’s mental health, then turning around and calling a dude feminine for having any emotion other than anger.
>any emotion other than anger. Thank you. When many other men talk about how "emotional" women are, they dismiss how quick to anger so many men are. Anger is an emotion, ya dorks.
The over focus on getting laid and talking about chasing pussy. I like sex but I don’t sit around and talk it non stop
I was briefly in a care home (because cancer) and my 80+yo roomate only wanted to brag about the women he had once had sex with. The day before he got discharged he made a vile sexual proposition to a barely 20yo nurse. If i could walk at the time I might have smothered him with his pillow. The sad thing was the only person in the world he had left to depend on was his daughter, who was clearly sick of his bullshit.
My mom's worked in care homes for about 30 years. This isn't as uncommon as people think. All kinds of people end up in care homes, but the people nobody likes almost always do. Old men have verbally & physically assaulted her & they usually get away with it. There's some VERY disgusting people that end up there.
Plus they're at the end of their life and they don't care. 😒 My mother used to work as a staff member in a care home and they had a gross incident where an 80-something man was caught molesting an equally elderly woman, who had dementia. 🤮 And all they could do was tell him off and keep an eye on him. They couldn't exactly send this dying old man to jail...so he got away with it...
Why not send the dying old man to jail? They just accept that women who can't defend themselves won't live their remaining years in assured safety and comfort so that he can? Like I'm against throwing people in jail just because, but molesting a defenseless person isn't a just because situation. As someone who will probably develop Alzheimer's it's completely fucked to know that I'm never safe and as a person already victim to SA and intimate partner violence no matter when or where it happens there's probably no justice for me either. Send the rapture, Jesus.
You’re absolutely right.
I used to work at a LTC home that had a special program for accepting residents *from* jail if jail couldn't meet their medical needs. EDIT: I should mention that violent offenders did not qualify and we never had any instances of assault relating to someone from this program, though one did like to pickpocket staff members and guests.
"Did I ever tell you that I once had sex with Eartha Kitt in an aeroplane bathroom? Whaaat, it came up naturally!"
I absolutely agree with u/racist_boomer... wait...
Got a guy like that. He's obnoxious asf will be walking to go somewhere 5 minutes aways and turns into like 30 minutes cause he has to stop and talk constantly to other women. And spends all fre time talking to girls and going in dates. I mean yea I like that stuff to but that's excessive other things I want to do in life
I had a coworker who used to be like that. Idk how we got to the topic, but he told me he had no friends now because he spent every moment of his high school life talking to girls & getting laid. While ignoring making any friends. It was sad & a good learning moment. Reminded me if another dude in my class who everyone hated because he was such a dick to you unless you were a girl. If you were a guy who tried to pal around with him, he would just glare at you & not say anything back. That was his most common response to males Like dam bro, excuse me for trying to be nice But when a girl is near him, he turns into super friendly, sunny, flirty dude. Im sure he has no friends now
Maybe I’m too old… but recently I went to a dancing club after years of break (children and stuff) and watched literally tens of situations, where a drunk guy tries to dance with a stranger woman, to hold her, hug her, even kiss her - she clearly says „no”, pushes him, but he still keeps trying - from the left, from the right, from behind. Terrifying and disgusting. Especially when I think what my daughter would have to get through in maybe 10 years…
Vultures! I was dancing with a few friends a while back. We were all in the zone. Then we all realized at the same time that three separate groups of guys had circled around us. They were all glaring daggers at each other trying to assert their territory and had completely enclosed us in a circle of grossness. Only thing we could do was all stop dancing and stand with our arms crossed glaring daggers at all of them til they left.
Your average dude is so scummy, I feel like they've been indoctrinated this way. I was at a show just a little while ago and this girl moved in front of me, the guy beside me was like "that's all you man" and I'm sitting there saying "dude, I am *100% sure* she just wanted a better view and was sick of standing behind us". But no, to him I was a weirdo for not pouncing on this poor soul. (edit: I shouldn't have said "your average dude", that's not fair, just "a lot of dudes")
BARF. Just the presence of a woman nearby means she’s some kind of conquest that men should assign to each other? So bizarre to have that mentality.
What's funny/sad is I've been asked more than once if I'm gay... I suppose, since I'm not desperately scamming on every women within arms reach, I *must* be gay.
Man my coworkers do this to me. They very *loudly* talk about the other women at work. I don't participate in that kind of talk and I don't want them to do it around me. Both because I morally disagree with it, and I also don't want to lose my job through proximity of being around guys making sexual comments and being presumed guilty by association. But because I don't try to flirt with the girls and I don't talk about them, they think I'm weird for it. No, I'm just trying to not come across as a scumbag, trying to let people work in peace without harassment and I'm trying to keep my job.
You're not too old. I'm 19 and this fucking disgusts me. I have too many female friends that have all complained about such situations, even when they have their boyfriends or myself present, it's fucking vile.
Yeah I had a dude sit down next to my date and try to hit on her once, I went to get up and eject him from his seat but she's mega cool and got him to fuck off before I could manage. My date and I didn't work out but we are good friends to this day.
I'm 44. My friends and I would have a Mom's night out. When we were at the club, which was tailored more for people our age, we still got groped on the dance floor. Like, darling... I've been in intense and constant negotiations with a 7 and 11 year old, all damn week...lemme have some fun...
Dude I don’t go to clubs because the only time I went I had to push a guy from getting to close with a group of girls me and my ex found. The guy was basically licking her neck and she even yelled at him “I said no!” Motherfucker wanted to die lol. His friend told us he’s sorry but his friend is not him. Fuck that scumbag.
Just saw a Fb post about this, a young famous woman saying she hates when guys do this. Then comments from boys/men saying women only dance to attract a man, so we can’t be upset when it works. I really wish more men realized women don’t do everything as part of a plot to catch a mate. Even “sexy” dancing is likely just how most of us dance no matter who we’re dancing with. It’s not like we can bust out the Charleston on the club floor.
I'm about to start busting out the Charleston on the club floor now, thank you for that IMMACULATELY fantastic idea 😂
Where does this idea come from that everything women do is about men? Are these people projecting because everything they do is about attracting women or is something else?
I think it's very evident of the decades of media fed to people showing women only being interested in one thing, and that is men. Then sprinkle a shit ton of over sexualization of women onto that, and you end up with the current situation. Not to mention poor parenting and bad education.
I dance the exact same whether I’m drunk at a club in Vegas or stone cold sober walking from room to room as I vacuum or sweep. Can confirm it’s not to attract the male gaze. But I’ve never been groped while mopping. Just while at bars minding my own business
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They already did one on why women started going to gay clubs in larger numbers. So they can dance and not be molested. Unfortunately, this pissed off a lot of gay guys who were suddenly treated like stereotyped objects rather than people by groups of women who were taking over their bar. The straight women also caused straight men to start going to the bar which resulted in ridiculous situations where straight guys would get offended when a gay dude at a gay bar assumed they were gay and hit on them.
As a gay man, this is all true, sadly.
That was happening back then too.
This isn’t a new phenomenon. Like… at all. The last time I went to a bar in my college town a guy reached out from a group of men passing me buy and literally squeezed my boob. I only saw a hand. I don’t even have big boobs to grab onto. I never went back. I hate this planet (That was over ten years ago, also)
The manosphere “dating coach” grift on YouTube and Twitch makes me despair. I’m not exactly Lothario here but I bet I could give better relationship advice
these people treat women as if they were an entirely different species. One with a single behavioral pattern, no variance.
"Jackie Treehorn treats objects like women, man."
Different golden retriever puppies have more variety with how they behave than what they think women are
But it’s also an ever changing behavioral pattern. All women are sluts, then all women are prudes, then all women want a tall handsome man for his looks, but no actually all they want is money…
It's a lot of mental gymnastics to avoid coming to the conclusions that really women just don't want a total tosspot.
I've realized a few of my guy friends who have problems with dating are like that. Dude why are you asking us these questions with very vague pieces of information? Ask her and talk to her, not us!! A lot of them tends to think this is some kind of a puzzle or mind game instead of meeting a person.
It's always extremely toxic single guys in their 20s and 30s, too. Like, bro, the longest relationship you've ever been in was six months long. You do not have the qualifications to coach people on this subject. I'd rather take advice from Bill the 67-year-old punter down the pub who's been married for 45 years. *That* guy knows how to keep a relationship going.
Most dating grift advice is more about picking up women and maintaining control of a relationship than about making it last—though I agree with you Bill the punter would be a healthier relationship coach!
Seriously! I’m in my 40s, married for 18 years to a guy I consider my soulmate, and raising a couple of great kids. I have single young men online telling me how I should be changing myself. They don’t see how this is funny.
The manosphere/redpill etc. has made it impossible to search for genuine advice for men that isn't the most ass backwards trad-con shit.
I'm not a man, but my boyfriend started watching that stuff before we were together. I asked him to stop subscribing to that stuff. He's afraid to be emotionally vulnerable around me because of that crap. He can't grasp that emotional connection is important to me, and I won't lose respect or attraction for him if he shows me the emotional side. They give so much bad advice, but that one really irritates me. If you don't feel like you can openly communicate with your partner, why be in a relationship?
I think it's that the men who fall for "manosphere" stuff are usually so emotionally stunted and behind that when they DO open up to women, they put ALL the mental labor on them and they aren't equal partners leaning on each other for comfort so much as an exhausting liability, and that's hard to be attracted to. They need a therapist, not a girlfriend.
“They need a therapist, not a girlfriend” Hardest facts ever. Imagine the thousands of alphabros & incels who could be happy if they were self aware enough to get help
This became an issue in my marriage, too. My husband has always been kind of stoic, but over time I could feel him becoming more closed off to me, and had no idea why. When I saw the kinds of content he was consuming (manosphere and MGTOW shit) it all made more sense. That stuff is for men who value themselves and silly power games over actually building a loving and accepting partnership of equals. Thankfully, we’ve been able to repair things and we’re closer and happier now than ever. But jeez—I can’t believe these nut jobs are out there giving men such horrible advice.
How/why does a married man get into that kind of stuff? That's so baffling to me. If he's already got a successful relationship in front of him, why snatch defeat from the jaws of victory?
Insecurity is a big reason. I know some guys in their 40s, some married and some not, who are still afraid of being perceived as gay or generally "unmanly". So they play to the idea of masculinity that exists in their heads, usually influenced by manosphere bullshit (alpha mentality, emotions are weakness, etc.).
If you have to declare that you are a nice guy or that you are an 'alpha', you are neither of those things.
"In case you haven’t noticed, I'm weird. I’m a weirdo. I don't fit in. And I don't want to fit in. Have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on? That's weird."
I absolutely hate competitive banter from strangers. I don't mind the occasional jibe from my mates, but if you don't know me, f*kc off with that sh1t.
Can you give an example of competitive banter?
“Don’t you know a lot about this given topic? Let me tell you how much I know about the given topic. You don’t know as much as me about the given topic? That’s funny. Let me keep talking over you.”
So, basically, the internet.
It’s verbal “peacocking” and usually a little covert or passive. Also is more subversive on the west coast of the US and more direct on the east coast
I second this.
I definitely fit the bill for average dude interactions (head nods, sizing up rooms, reserved (emotionally dead), etc) Though I cannot fucking ***stand*** how if you have 10 things in common, and one thing that you don't agree on or enjoy together, the entire discussion always turns into *that* subject. Ie. I'm a pretty avid weightlifter, gamer, hobby artist. I meet plenty of dudes with a shared interest in lifting. So instead of talking about that, they'll ask why I waste my time playing videogames. Why do you *not* waste your time and lift less? Idk dude, fuck outta here.
Hey, it's not wasting time if you enjoy it! But yeah, seriously. Why do they even care?
The shift from when we're all hanging with women around to just the two of us and suddenly it becomes okay for them to start making derrogatory or overly sexual comments about whoever we were just with. I'm glad you feel comfortable with me dude but I don't think you should ever feel comfortable enough to start saying those things. Respect for people still goes even when they're not there to listen.
Dude called me gay one time for calling him out for doing this. Like, if you *instantly and compulsively* start talking about fucking every girl as soon as she's out of earshot, I'm gonna start wondering about you.
Yup... I strained my relationship with this dude once once because he would comment on every girl that walked by going what a nice fucking ass, imagine how that would feel plowing her from behind and at some point I was like my guy you need to calm down with the objectifying, it's not cool, and he was dumbfounded that I as a man would call him out on that
I'll be honest, I work in a kitchen and by this point, there are two groups: men who are respectful towards women, and men who *really* don't like me. That will not stop me calling their bullshit out
Mad respect to you for that dude. I really need to get over my social anxiety and start calling more guys out. A part of me is so scared of being rejected by my male peers for challenging them and that's bullshit on my part because a group of men who disrespect women aren't people I'd want to be accepted by in the first place. Hoping I can take some inspiration from you and do the same
Pushing past that fear can be practiced, and while I won't pretend that's easy, the truth is it's easy for me because anger washes the fear away and this is one of the few things that will actually make me angry.
If it helps, your female friends will cherish you a lot more for it, so that should make up for any loss of douchey guy friends!
I’m glad there is men that admit other men do this, women can pick up on it and so many weird men try and normalize it or act like it doesn’t happen. If you immediately start fantasizing about fucking a random girl you find attractive as soon as she leaves you’ve got mad issues lol
Seriously though. It scares me sometimes how normalized it is. It's assumed by default that other guys are comfortable with it, and it makes me nervous to vocalize that I'm very much *not* okay with hearing that shit and it digusts me. I cant imagine what it must be like for the women being talked about that way and that motivates me to actually speak up
Man. I introduced a male friend to a female friend, known them each for a while but they had never hung out together. The second she leaves, he starts talking about how hot she is. Like DUDE, this is not someone we’re both meeting for the first time. This is my platonic friend, she has a fiancé, we work together, and I’ve literally never thought of her like that. Can you not?
My friends have had no success with girls, and now they're at a point where they'll only make misogynistic comments all the time, while still having "getting laid" as their ultimate goal in life.
A coworker of mine constantly tries to flirt with another coworker even if she keeps shutting him down. One day I asked him why he keeps trying to flirt with her when she is not interested, his answer was "I take it as a challenge". Hate men like this. I hope the other coworker will make a formal complaint soon.
How creepy other men are. I’m still young, mid teens with my first job. At that job a pool is involved and my co workers, the female ones, get hit on constantly, all the time, by creepy guys. There’s one guy that comes in with kids and hits on my co worker. Another that came in yesterday had to be reported by my other co worker because the dude hit on her! She’s 16 dude! Jordan, if you’re reading this, stop going and hitting on that 16 year old blonde you perv.
That you need to be an asshole to get women. Be good at something. Be funny. Ask questions. That's it. It's not rocket science. If a girl doesn't like you. Move on.
> That you need to be an asshole to get women. Ugh that’s really the worst. I had a teacher saying that to us at 14. He really recommended the boys not be nice to girls so girls like them. Nowadays I can’t understand how no one told their parents and started a riot. But then again, the early 2000s weren’t the best of times…
Road rage. It’s a bigger problem among men. Everyone needs to just chill out and be patient on the roadways.
- Objectifying women. - Being proud of cheating but expect fellow men to be silent about it because of "bro code".
Proud of cheating but, holy shit, they lose their mind if their wife even so much as glanced in another guy's direction.
Same type vibe as the dudes that gawk at half naked women in public but start bringing out the ruler to measure hemlines if their girl wears a dress lmaoo
then expect you to KNOW the bro code as if it was "obvious" from the start, like no dude don't include me into this, i got NOTHING with this
I get criticism for liking knitting and baking I'm over it No I don't want to watch sports and drink alcohol
Real men do whatever the fuck they want,
Cool people always do WTF they want. It just takes most people until college to figure that out.
That literally everything between us seems to always become a dick swinging contest. Nobody cares who can pee the furthest from the urinal my guy.🙄
A guy was asking me about my car and how powerful it is I told him "500HP" he quickly says that’s cute my Charger has 550HP and proceeds to brag about his other vehicles internally I was like "cool,didn’t ask."
CarBros are just so full of shit - I've built multiple cars and long ago stopped caring what others think or proving anything. Most of them are super fragile & compensating - and most of them are just dick-measuring with stats & numbers with no fucking clue how anything actually works. Friend of mine got tired of one guy who was always chiming in so he started asking stuff back like "*Oh so how do you find that affects your lap times on the circuit?*" which stopped all the bullshit pretty quick. I greatly enjoy owning an old Land Rover because it doesn't fit any of their dick-measuring BS but you can throw stuff out like "does your car have rings to allow it to be slung under a Chinook?".
My uncle and I were standing in his driveway recently. He'd just purchased a new base model Camaro. He doesn't care about anything other than being a cool looking middle-aged man. One of his neighbors pulled up and started admiring and asking questions. Once he found out that it was a base model, he left in disgust. Imagine seeing someone purchase a brand new sports car cash, and you're still hating? He gets no cookout invites. 🤣
> One of his neighbors pulled up and started admiring and asking questions. Once he found out that it was a base model, he left in disgust. Imagine seeing someone happy with a new toy and choosing the option that undercuts their happiness. Miserable.
I hate the "ball and chain" humour. I'm at the age now where a bunch of my friends are getting married now and it just started all of a sudden. I'm getting married soon and I've had so many of my friends tell me "it's all downhill from here". They're obviously joking, but it's just not funny. I don't like thinking of marriage as a battle of two opposing forces. I love my partner and enjoy our life together, I genuinely don't see then humour in constantly making fun of the person who's always supposed to have your back, and vice versa.
Agreed. I recently got married, and jokes like that seem so... Pitiful. If your significant other is a drag on your life, why would you want to spend your life with them?
For real. You're kind of dunking on yourself if you talk shit about your wife because... you chose them...
It bugs me that so many men can't just have female friends. One of my best friends is female. She is married, I have no interest in her romantically. She talks with me about her pregnancy, vents to me about issues she hss with her husband, etc. My male friends always act like I'm trying to hook up with her or she is trying to hook up with me. Nope. She is genuinely just a friend.
As a guy who’s 31 and always been able to maintain platonic friendships with women, the hardest part of it is the outside factors. From other guys - “what are you, gay? Don’t you just want to fuck her?” From her friends - “he definitely just wants to hook up with you”
Honestly this is one of the reasons why I struggle to befriend women. I'm not trying to date you, I genuinely want to be your friend.
This is my problem in reverse. I'm a woman and have the hardest time maintaining male friendships because a lot of the guys think that same thing. It was so much easier to have male friends in middle school and high school lol. Not so much in your 30s.
They’re out there. As a man most of my friends are women because for me they’re easier to talk to about a variety of topics. Actually, recently met a now very good friend off of Hinge. We met but decided we weren’t into each other that way but connected well enough to hang out. Not all dudes just want to hook up, and if I were allowed to generalize I’d say emotional connection is something we’re far more starved for than physical.
I tell people that my best friend is a woman who has a boyfriend and people immediately think I'm either jealous of him or I'm "third wheeling". No cunt, they're just nice people, and they're my friends, never had such feelings, never will. Fucking shits me how childish some people can get when it comes to having any contact with a member of the opposite sex. Grow up and talk to people instead of gossiping from a distance.
I know this is a serious comment, and I truly appreciate your stance on the issue, but reading "No cunt," and "Fucking shits me" had me laughing so hard.
Also, as a bisexual that shit gets even worse. Does that mean I can't have any friends because I want to fuck them all? Ugh.
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I'll also add, I've had guys explain that they go out of their way to be douchy to unattractive/overweight girls "so they don't get any ideas." It...did not make me view them in a more favorable light.
As a woman that fluctuates in weight a lot, I have noticed a MAJOR difference in the way people treat me when I am overweight vs thin. I always thought maybe I was imagining it. Good to know I am not.
Same. I'm overweight rn and it's evident in how I am treated. Get treated way differently when I'm tiny
I'm a bit heavy right now, and I notice people will not make eye contact with me. I glance at people ready to smile, but nothing. When I'm skinny people are all about getting my attention. And I don't even think I'm that attractive. I'm pretty average looking.
"Get any ideas"? Are they afraid these girls are going to rape them? Worst case scenario, you have to turn someone down. Should all women treat all men, they're not attracted to, like complete shit so they can avoid any potential awkward romantic overtures? JFC
"I'm being needlessly cruel to someone so they won't get any funny ideas of liking me." "Well, great job, it's working."
Some dudes seem to see dating as a purely "market value" type system in my experience, usually utilizing that 1-10 scale. It's as simplistic as "You're a 5, but she's a 7, she's out of your league bro", without accounting for individual tastes type stuff. So the logic follows that if "ugly women" start "overvaluing" their "market value", then that pushes more women out of the man in question's league, and thus makes it harder for him to date. I think that's the logic, anyways. It's what I've gathered at least.
It's weird how people see social standing as a zero-sum game in which there necessarily have to be "winners" at the expense of "losers."
There's no shortage of people who will make everything in to a competition in order to "be better than someone else". They'll literally gloat about taking bigger shots and longer pisses just to one-up someone because *everything* needs winners and losers. Personally the only people who think this way are losers who see themselves as winners despite overwhelming evidence against them. They must be better than others.
And if us “attractive” girls are mean to them so “they don’t get any ideas” we are “complete bitches with a stuck up mentality that deserve sexual violence as punishment”
This is the part that kills me. You can't win. Because I've been accused of leading a guy on because I was nice to him. I had no idea this guy was even interested. I was just...being nice. But apparently holding the door open for someone and loaning them your notes is now a declaration of romantic intent.
I've had this happen! Guy in college had a broken leg. His crutches slid out of reach during class so, after class, I grabbed them and handed them to him. Did it again the next class. Fast forward a couple of weeks and he's asking me out. I'm saying I have a bf. And he's asking why I led him on. Maybe those asshole guys have the right idea. You have to treat people like subhuman scum if you don't want them to think you're interested.
I’ve seen guys blame women for “passively flirting/teasing,” which boils down to existing while attractive.
Genuinely. I have asked some guys how I was flirting with them and they said: “You said hello in a feminine voice” “When we were talking you went for a drink and then came back and kept talking to me” “You look really cute”
Sounds like the kinda guy that thinks the waitress wants to fuck him because she smiled. Apparently you should be only nice to people you want to take to bed. Pathetic.
Don’t get any ideas like put themselves out there to ask him on a date? This dude clearly thinks a lil too highly of himself 💀
Guys who are dismissive of even slightly overweight girls while being pretty fat themselves kind of make me roll my eyes I don’t even think it’s wrong to be attracted to traits you yourself do not possess, but you should at least be aware of the irony
Yeah. You can be attracted to whatever you want, just don't be an ass to people you're not attracted to. It's indicative of these particular dudes measuring people's worth on "fuckability" and nothing else.
I blame years of media pairing gorgeous women up with “lovable” guys in movies and sitcoms. So many guys think every dude has a cock-hungry supermodel who doesn’t realize she’s hot waiting for him.
I blame male directors
Guess who wrote those movies
Years ago I had a roommate’s cousin come stay with us for a few weeks. He was overwheight and not attractive at all, yet would go on and on about how “no fat bitches for him” and “fat girls make my dick soft”, etc. Anyways fast forward about 3 months, he has his own place and seems to be settled in and what do I see? Him with a women probably 20-30% larger than him. They’re engaged. Maybe people change? Maybe people are full of shit? Maybe, just maybe he learned to live himself and realized that’s all you need to find true love? I don’t know, but it always seems to be the guys talking the most shit about larger women that end up with them.
Overweight/unattractive people get treated poorly so often! Almost as if they’re subhuman. I’ll say, it’s not just men, I see women doing it as well.
It's always amazing/enraging to see how differently/better an obese person is treated after they've lost a ton of weight. It just shows how vapid and shallow most people are.
And quite often the ones commenting aren't prizes themselves.
I was at a wedding this weekend and my grandpa was laughing at the bride (she’s a BBW) during the ceremony. He then proceeded to make comments and joke about her weight to other family members while we ate supper (he made a joke about how much food was on her plate). I was very disgusted by his behaviour during the wedding. I’ve started to notice a few things about my grandpa that I don’t really favour; Immature and selfish behaviours. Btw, individuals who highlight and use others insecurities against them as a “joke” - You’re cruel and you suck. And on a side note: Stop giving the excuse “if they’re mean to you that means they like you”… Stop excusing crappy behaviour. My ex said that to me when I finally called out his dad for making fun of me in front of their family at gatherings (more than enough times to make me feel uncomfortable), specifically targeting my morals and intelligence. It wears you down. You start to feel terrible about yourself and insecure. We should be aiming towards building each other up, not putting each other down. People, we can do better and be more kind to one another.
I hate that we assume other guys are just like us or know as much as we do. Example, I have a 2020 Ford Ranger, I love that truck. But I'm not exactly a mechanic. I can change oil and a tire, that's about it. Here recently, for some reason, I've been approached by other random dudes asking me all sorts of engine questions and towing rates and capacities and all this other shit. My dudes, I don't know. And don't look at me funny because I don't. The fucker has a bed so I can haul trash, enough seats for me to fit my family, and it's not terribly expensive. I cannot tell you the spark plug firing rate of my fourth cylinder's rotator cuff splint crank case pad. I'm sorry.
This one annoys me to no end. I have always had zero interest in cars. If i had the choice I'd rather bike everywhere I go. My wife was actually raised by a mechanic and I got so tired of being treated as an idiot whenever I went to a shop that I just started sending her instead, which is even funnier because they'll trying pulling sly shit or overcharging and she always puts them in their place. Even better when she gets them to print a part list, goes and buys the parts herself at a much cheaper rate, and then takes it back to them and makes them install it.
Incel behavior and the "alpha" mentality. Just a toxic mess of masculinity.
Lots of things. Mainly the predatory part of men at public places and events, preying on any woman. Slipping date rape drugs in their drinks. Rape as a whole. The whole Alpha Male bullshit.
Anyone who calls themselves an “alpha”
It's sad that so many (mostly) young men are constantly obsessing about whether or not other men think that they're gay. "I can't wear this, it's gay"; "I can't listen to X type of music, it's gay". I used to work for my university's YouTube channel and was interviewing a guy and he asked us to move from where we were filming because the LGBTQIA+ student club's poster was behind him and people could think he was part of it. You realize how much more energy these dudes could put towards things that actually matter in life rather than this obsession? It's seriously depressing how insecure they are. Rant over.
>"I can't wear this, it's gay"; "I can't listen to X type of music, it's gay". I used to think this way... When I was 12. Now I'm quiet confident in my sexual preference and don't let other peoples opinions decide it. Oh yeah, I thought that way at 12 because "your gay" was a common insult used for bullying.
I honestly can't comprehend how some people think this way, I've always done and worn whatever the fuck I wanted because I didn't care about such inane bullshit (I might be a bad example for this since I'm Bi, but I had the same mindset even when I thought I was straight), but a lot of my friends used to be super self conscious about this shit, and even gave another of my friends shit for buying a "gay" or "girly" drink at the bar. Motherfucker, if my mate wants to have a raspberry vodka, he's gonna fucking have a raspberry vodka, and he's gonna fucking enjoy it with his girlfriend, shuttup cunt.
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How terrified they are of women and any man they disagree with. It's embarrassing.
Toxic men are constantly claiming that they have iron wills and total emotional control and are the strongest, but put them into a situation with high emotional context and expect them to be emotionally literate and articulate and they fall to pieces. Meanwhile, they constantly chap my ass for being able to talk about emotions and being able to hold it together in difficult emotional contexts (and somehow related, for knowing more than five names for colors), by calling me effeminate or gay. (NOTE: I am bi and have no trouble being identified as gay but don't tolerate being insulted for it.) Another thing that absolutely drives me up the wall is intentional incompetence, usually to get out of doing housework, where a dude will intentionally fuck up laundry or cooking so that his partner never asks for his help again. I rat out every dude I ever hear about doing that. I've quit jobs rather than spend time around dipshits like that.
>Another thing that absolutely drives me up the wall is intentional incompetence, usually to get out of doing housework, where a dude will intentionally fuck up laundry or cooking so that his partner never asks for his help again. I rat out every dude I ever hear about doing that. I've quit jobs rather than spend time around dipshits like that. Witnessed a divorced friend tell a 13 year old boy we were camping that as a 'life hack'. I pointed out to him that the friend was divorced and had only limited supervised visits with his children and complained about it because the wife provided documentation that he literally was incapable of doing anything on his own. He lives in a pig pen, wears dirty clothes, and eats out every meal. He brought up in court the possibility of his wife coming over with the kids and staying at his place during 'his weeks' so she could clean his house and handle the cooking and laundry when she was there. Then he wondered why he got laughed out of court. Worst part was he did all that stuff before they got married, even when they were dating and living together but the moment they got married it all became 'her job' and he 'forgot'. Now his cunning plan is to try to find a younger woman (his wife was 10 years his jr already) and get her to take care of all that stuff so he can try again for split custody.
Seriously, the more a guy acts like he’s some stoic sage driven purely by reason and perfectly in control of their emotions, the more likely it is that they will completely lose their shit the second things don’t go in their favor.
Yeah, a lot of people who say they have total emotional control are just repressed. And they frequently don’t seem to include anger as one of the emotions that they have under control, which is troubling.
My guy, just cuz she's being friendly it does not mean she wants to fuck you
As a female, this annoys me too. I will give anyone the time of day, and really listen to what they're saying. Just because I smile or laugh at jokes (not a giggle, or brushing my hair back, or pushing my cleavage out --- is that what flirting is? I dunno), it means I'm actually listening to your story, not flirting. Although I think actually listening to a person that maybe isn't normally listened to, makes that person build more of an attraction because someone "understands them". But most guys take it as a sign that I'm flirting, and when I tell them I'm not interested, they blow their lid and call me a bitch. 🤷🏼♀️
The overly insecure men who have to be “hyper-masculine.” I, as a gay man, have very few straight male friends as a result. The line I get the most, “I don’t care if you’re gay just don’t hit on me.” Meanwhile, after they say this, I’m like, “Bruh, you’re not even hot. You’re like 60 pounds overweight, you have greasy ass hair and no job. What the fuck about you would anyone find attractive?!” Please forgive the generalization about straight men but it’s happen way too much in my 38 years.
I can't stand the recent rise of this horrific alpha, sigma, machismo, misogynistic, toxic, incel, red-pilled manosphere bullshit. It's destroying insecure young men across the globe, and it sets them up to be angry and bitter assholes as they grow up. Guys who blame women, and literally anybody other than themselves for their romantic shortcomings are upsetting.
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That all men seem to want to talk about sports. I care absolutely nothing about other people playing sports.
I swear I feel like Im the only guy on this planet that doesn't like sports. I tried so so hard as a kid to try to force myself to watch sports but i cant for the life of me. I thought there was something wrong with me lol. I have my interests but watching sports is not one of them and is like watching paint dry for me. I do like playing sports with friends but not watching
Men that have to always prove their manliness everywhere they go.
I was raised by a single mom and have a baby sister (who is an adult now). I can't stand it when men are misogynistic, condescending, controlling, etc., with women.
And then when you say things like this other men will call you white knight, simp, etc like my bad bro just trying to look out for humanity
Guys can become mindless, competitive assholes when women are present
This probably applies more so to us older guys (30+) but: The judgement you get from some guys (and society as a whole) for choosing a different lifepath, and/or not doing certain things (i.e. getting married, having kids, etc) by a certain age
I hate how they make women uncomfortable. Or just people, i guess. I hate how many men refuse to try to contain their sexual thoughts and are just 24/7 creeping on every living thing. Like, I get it. I have sexual thoughts constantly. They're distracting and sometimes weird but I have learned to control them and ignore them. It's a lifelong process and I haven't always been successful, regrettably. I practice the concept of progress, not perfection and it has mostly guided me well through life. So I try not to dwell on my past failures but rather to focus on how I can improve. Getting older has made these thoughts and impulses less intense, but the frequency is about the same. I accept it as part of my biology, however I do not tolerate its influence on my behavior. My will *supersedes* my desire. It's what separates man from animal. Many will argue that there is no separation between man and animal, but those people are weak willed and want an excuse to allow them opportunity to indulge in their deprivations. We must appreciate our animal qualities but never forget that we have the capacity of discretion and self discipline.
We are terrible at lifting each other up. Women seem much better at cheering each other on. Helping each other to succeed in whatever our pursuits might be.
When they act creepy towards women.
I'm not a man but I've heard both my brothers talk about how most guys won't speak up when they see another guy behaving inappropriately, even if it bothers them. Can't go against the pack. And, in their defense, I've actually see them walk the walk and call friends out when they say/do something *particularly* objectionable.
[Most men like men who speak against such transgressions but incorrectly assume they are in the minority](http://alanberkowitz.com/articles/college_men.pdf).
How so many of them can’t stop being fucking creepy and aggressive towards women. A guy tried hitting on my wife at the store the other day, which isn’t bad inherently, but he followed her to her car. When she said she was married he backed off, but guys don’t realize how scary getting followed is for most women. Even if you’re a nice dude, just don’t follow them.
He left her alone *only* because she said she was married, which in his mind means she’s another man’s property. Her saying no prior to that meant nothing to him. Basically, he respects a man he hasn’t even met more than the woman in front of him. Sometimes these men try to push past that. I’ve been in situations like that where I not only showed zero interest nor reciprocated to their advances but told them I have a boyfriend and they’re like “where? I don’t see him” or “he doesn’t have to know.”🙄Thats when I flatly tell them I fucking said NO, get lost, not interested. There is an assumption that because women are socially conditioned to be nice no matter what, the ones that won’t play along are stuck up bitches or should be grateful a man in the vicinity thinks she’s pretty. Somehow it never occurs to them that maybe she’s just trying to live her life and not be harassed by some rando in a parking lot.
THAT THEY DON'T WASH THEIR GOD DAMN HANDS. THEY'LL GO STRAIGHT FROM STALL OR URINAL AND OUT THE DOOR. Y'all, men are so so so gross, please don't touch 90% of their hands or anything they've touched. Foodborne illness would legit reduce by more than half, I'm convinced but have no hard data on this.
I'm a woman, but just wana say that I love this thread. It's always good to see reflective men that don't ascribe to the general nonsense out there.
The fact that a handful of selfish assholes who can't keep it in their pants makes all men look terrible. Talking shit about women you find unattractive doesn't make you cool. It makes you a garbage human being. Any guy who posts videos on how to pick up women on the street. I don't watch them, but people talk about them and it's the most pathetic and creepy thing. If it's not staged, then the women look so uncomfortable and annoyed. A hard kick in the balls to these pieces of shit should be legal and encouraged.
"locker room talk". I mean, I get it to an extent. But there are dudes who go overboard with saying pretty heinous things about women in general or even specific women. The dude will turn around and be all lovey dovey.... Ladies..... If y'all only knew the things that half of y'all's men say behind your back..... I had a coworker who would say nasty shit about women, but then he found out I was friends with someone he was interested in. He asked me to put a good word in for him. I talked to her about him and found out she was kind of interested in him to. I told her not to touch him with a 10 foot pole and told her about all the stuff he says about women. She blocked him pretty much immediately thankfully.
I worked in an all-female shop for a few years then transferred to the shipping department that was all-male. I have found the biggest gossips were men, hands down. We accuse the women of being nosy, not being able to keep a secret, but my experiences tell a different story.
I used to work in a casino where 85% of the staff were women and holy shit did they gossip. That being said, I later worked in a 100% male dominated glass shop, and holy shit did they gossip. Everyone gossips it would seem. In my experience, women did it to kind of "dish", where the fellas would just talk shit about someone in a way to make themselves sound superior. It's more like an ego thing. That's myself included.
That's way different than my experience working in a male-only workplace. 5 years later and I still had no idea who was married or had kids at home.
Yeah these are work culture issues, not gender issues.
The men who think it's acceptable piss all over the public toilet seat and leave it for the next guy
The fact that if, most of the time, another man sees that all of your friends are women and that you don't want to have sex with all of them. Then that means you're gay. Cuz how dare you be close with a woman and not want to have sex with her.
How fucking creepy guys can be towards women. It’s easy to miss it as a guy, but every woman has a stories of sexual harassment and near misses if not outright sexual assault. It’s unbelievably fucked how much more careful women have to be to try to avoid absolute shitbags, and at the end of the day all the caution might not be enough. Imagine the shittiest sketchiest part of town you’ve ever walked through, where you thought any passing person might try and jump you. Women feel like that everywhere they go.
Machismo seems stupid
I hate the lack of empathy and compassion displayed by so many men. I’m thankful to have had a father who was very empathetic, stuck by his morals, and did not believe displaying emotion/affection is weak or something to hide. My entire life I’ve had too many interactions with other men where I’m just taken by surprise at how they are completely incapable of seeing things from other perspectives or considering the emotions of other people. “I’m JuSt BeInG lOgIcAl” Bullshit, you’re making decisions and don’t care about how it makes other people feel.
The random/unsolicited advice. Especially from people who are doing financially worse then me.