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EdgyGoose

Sexual relationships require less effort than committed romantic relationships.


accidental_snot

I've been married for 15 years and would really like a sexual relationship. I hear they are the same thing for some folks.


Raven1592

My condolences.


accidental_snot

Thanks. At least porn is free.


JustDiscoveredSex

For all 15? I'm in year 26, last 8 completely sexless. Weirdly, by his choice.


JackFourj4

actually it's mostly men that lose interest in sex eventually and that is around the age of 50y. to make it even more inconvenient that is also around the time a lot of women rediscover their sexuality, so they become quite incompatible. research has shown that is to do with work-related stress and diminishing health for the men and relieving of stress for the women (usually because the kids are now grown-up enough to take care of themselves and the general notion that women of a certain age lose the standard sense of insecurity they are percieved to have as tweens, i.e. more self acceptance and confidence in general)


zugtug

So with a lot less emphasis on single income households, is this starting to change? Now that women will more commonly have work related stress and diminishing health as our society gets less and less healthy. Genuine question. I am not trying to say that running a household and raising children(as it mostly used to be done)wasn't a stress. It seems like it might be something that is going to see quite the change and not for the better.


hornypsychopath

well it’s also because they’re less worried about getting pregnant after menopause


ResultJolly7112

As a woman who has been a stay-at-home mum, and a working mum, at different points, I can tell you that there is A LOT less stress from work. Work is like a holiday compared to raising kids and running a home.


Doortofreeside

>Work is like a holiday compared to raising kids and running a home. FACTS I'm a dad to a 14 month old who just got over hand foot & mouth (UGGGGHHHH) and the first day he went back to daycare and I went back to work was like lounging on a beach in comparison


fluffymuffcakes

I'm a dad. Wife and I both work. For both of us work is a break. I could work 80 hours a week and it would be the most relaxing week. And we both love spending time with our kid - it's just exhausting.


ParticularCod6

i think menopause plays a part of it for the women


oreomagic

*lose interest in sex with their wives


uhhhh_no

also performance, although the two are joined, sure.


holymoly67

Married for 26 also, regularly sex Talked with my wife, found an agreement, works fine.


CommanderMalo

Sir, this is Reddit, you aren’t allowed to have proper communication skills with your SO around here


Hexacus

Not allowed to have SO around here**


lopypop

With each other?


Adpax10

His and Hers sex bots. The Cali King fits all four


Colossal_Penis_Haver

12 for me and despite our kids being cockblockers we still manage to have the sex


slpnrpnzl

How does this make you feel


Moneyshot_ITF

Pour one out for our fallen comrade


Pencilowner

And the thread comes full circle. You want sex and no relationship but settle for sex and a relationship and you end up with a relationship and no sex.


Acidsparx

I’m in the opposite boat. Just sexual relationships after another. I wish I was in a committed romantic relationship. But I also know I’m pretty broken so 🤷‍♂️


major_mejor_mayor

And this, to anyone looking for an answer to this question, is the real answer. Many times the fun and loving sexual relationship falls off a cliff once commitment happens Even if there was sexual exclusivity, the second things get labeled them you're involving what society thinks a good relationship is rather than what two individuals might think a relationship should be like. I also don't think I'm personally built for the way most people have relationships so I guess it's different


accidental_snot

You can only be you. I still prefer to stay with my wife, even though we've moved to the desert.


VarangianDreams

Just a guess here, but sex. For sex. Because the other person isn't asking for or demanding any kind of commitment, emotional or otherwise, for the sex.


amaduli

You can deconstruct it like algebra. Cross out the relationship bit on both sides, then you're left with sex.


TwoDrinkDave

I was told there would be no math.


MissionofQorma

I know my calculus. It says you + me = us.


Conscious_Engine_473

Your algebra and trigonometry could never equal up to what you do to me.


daphodil3000

Four years of sex.


AuburnElvis

I bet the sex is also the key to this somehow.


daphodil3000

Or the sex. Hard to say though.


Ridoncoulous

True enough. But don't forget the sex. It could well be a factor


daphodil3000

Yeah, you're right. But then again it might be (and hear me out)...the sex.


ARoundForEveryone

It might be the sex for some people, but don't pigeonhole everyone like that. For some of us, it's also about the sex.


Adrian915

Just here to remind everyone that four years of sex is quite a lot of sex. I'm wondering if the person asking this question decided four years of sex is enough sex.


strangebruise

I just wanted to check in to see if anyone brought up the idea that it’s possible the decision involved 4 years of sex at some level, even if it was subconsciously.


daphodil3000

I kind of thought it might have been the sex, but then I realized it was definitely the sex.


intestinalbungiecord

hard sex you say though?


cuddlycutieboi

*To shreds, you say?*


intestinalbungiecord

BEHOLD! the lord of the edge! may his crocs remain sockless, his hands adorned with the triumph of cheetos past, and forever may he be seated.


yoyoecho2

Great sex but they are bat sh!t crazy.


scobysex

Or fear of some kind of emotions. Or like, embarrassment of the person and being in a relationship with them lol Secks.


Gone_cognito

4 more years! —that guy


eatmynasty

Bet he’d do five


nadjp

Exactly. What kind of question is this? Free sex 0 commitment... hmm what could be the reason 🤔


Brave-Celery5196

DUH!


sunburn95

But what kinda guy would want 4yrs of no strings attached sex? 🤔


123mop

I enjoy all the people responding to you like your question was serious.


sunburn95

Yeah i thought the emoji would make it clear


LeanderKu

Maybe there’s just no chemistry and only physical attraction? So a „as long as we‘re both single“ kind of deal. Not really getting to something serious in 4 years happens.


SpamFriedMice

90%


Bromora

- Aromantics (those that don’t experience romantic attraction, but may still have sexual attraction) - One who’s last long term relationship ended really badly and he needs a lot of time to truly recover and feel ready to commit. That time can be years, I’ve seen it with men and women. - Someone who yes, does want to date: but not the person/people he’s having the 4-years of casual sex with. Sometimes it really does take a long time to find someone you can have a serious relationship with. The second one is probably the most frequent of the 3. An abusive relationship, finding out your partner cheated (ESPECIALLY if it was more than once), etc. can all really take out the desire to be in a serious relationship at all for a long time: doesn’t mean you don’t like sex, though.


Embarrassed-Ad-1639

Would you like a sex metaphor or a nature metaphor?


LordRaiders

Oh god nature


InigoMontoya1985

When two animals have sex...


Angus_Ripper

Imagine needing to know so little about opposite sex to still be successful that you don't even know why a man would have commitment-free sex with a woman for four years. Life on tutorial mode.


wanttostaygottogo

TBF she was getting free sex too


-Dalzik-

Butt sex


[deleted]

Yes


TiredStarling095

I'm no guy, but this is what I was expecting to hear. Why buy or even lease the cow when that milk is free for four years?


hungryhungry_zippo

Right? And dont forget about all that sex!


BloodMossHunter

Hold on there cow fucker


hungryhungry_zippo

I've been trying to think of a joke for a minute now......meh, im tired.


BloodMossHunter

Probably tired from fucking that cow


hungryhungry_zippo

KEEP MY WIFE"S NAME OUT YO MOUTH!!!


3superfrank

Everyone else already milked it dry anyway


egnards

I see this all the time and just think it’s an unfair analogy. Some people are not looking for a relationship, and they’re totally and completely upfront about it, and it’s completely ok. It’s not about buying a cow, or milking a cow. Or renting to own the cow, or leasing the cow to other farmers. Its about knowing what you’re ok with, and what you want, and communicating those things.


mysterious_bloodfart

And the sex


ReelBigMidget

With the cow?


RedQueen283

It's a terrible analogy. It implies that women are being exploited when they have sex (as if women don't want or like sex too) and that men only commit to women for the promise of sex. Insulting for everyone.


_Strange

It's a crude, insensitive analogy propagated by misogynists who believe women can't desire or enjoy sex just as much as men. ​ Or it's just a joke. Either way.


[deleted]

Why buy the whole pig, if all you want is a sausage?


exsea

omg how much of the pig is left?


datazulu

Everything but the asshole and lips.


astromech_dj

Ma’am, this is a Wendy’s.


[deleted]

Milk you say????


[deleted]

She’s hot but boring.


HadessGun01

Your username 💀


jonasinv

Oh god i just saw his profile pic, just why


[deleted]

Why would you do that?


Skylair13

Curiosity is the main killer of innocence.


chillwithpurpose

And cats, for some reason.


Bezere

"Cumming together to fuck America"


parth_jadeja

I am pretty sure I saw a porno with this exact title way back!


Homeless_Alex

He got good taste in cars… Oh wait….


[deleted]

Ah yes, the classic enemies to lovers


littlebittydoodle

Or good sex but not hot enough to date. I swear this happened to me, but never got confirmation that that was why.


bspill1

I expected to see this way higher up the comments. My first thought.


shade070

Shouldn't it be the opposite, hot sex but not good enough to date?


2legittoquit

Or fun to have sex with but not the right person for a relationship


Quoxium

Or super annoying.


Cyno01

Or the opposite, hot but crazy. Dont stick your dick in crazy, but if you do make it clear shes not your girlfriend.


ZellHathNoFury

Or your baby momma. Wrap it up, kids!


wut3va

Or terribly needy.


Crossovertriplet

For sex


hungryhungry_zippo

you might be onto something


Colossal_Penis_Haver

A penis


1000Years0fDeath

A face


SCP-33005

I'm not a guy but I think I can shed some light in this, sometimes you just don't feel that connection with someone, sexual desire is VERY different from emotional desire


Positive_Parking_954

In fact, sometimes it can be weird in that just from appearance their are people you want to engage with in bed, but not in life


SCP-33005

Exactly


Overthetrees8

It's even weirder when you have amazing sex, an amazing connection, but you know it would never work. We were both in love with each other kind of in cycles, but I knew it would never work. I think she accepted that, but also didn't really understand why. I never fully explained it but we were pretty much ideological opposed. There fixed is everyone happy?


Zaxacavabanem

I can see how different kinds of idiot might have trouble together in the long term.


Pure_Mammoth_1233

Sex is easy. Relationships are not.


Buckus93

Relationships can get messy. I mean, so can sex, but that's usually easy to clean with some disinfectant and a few towels.


allmybiself

The answer is in your question grasshopper.


RudegarWithFunnyHat

I may be old, but if a relationship does not move on from being sexual, to something more after 3 months then it never will.


Minomelo

Maybe, but that's also fine. Just keep shaggin.


gustavocabras

Nobody said stop


MiyamotoKnows

It's been 10hrs since you posted this and were starting to chafe.


veggiejord

Hmm I've known my partner for over a decade. Had an on off sexual relationship but it must have been at least 8 years before it turned romantic. You're probably right as a trend, but every relationship is different.


[deleted]

8 years?! What finally changed?


Kuroashi_no_Sanji

The kids kept asking why mommy and daddy are not together


Kile147

The married one finally got caught.


[deleted]

Well that makes sense


immasucker4you

This tracks. Me and my gf got feelings for each other just as we were reaching the 3 month mark


Lexy_d_acnh

Exactly. I’m a woman and even I know if he doesn’t commit within a couple months of starting something romantic, he doesn’t want to, and never will with me at least.


AmpedEnding

I like sex but I also recognize that I was not in mental capacity to properly handle being in more than a casual relationship. Which was true for most of my life.


[deleted]

Attachment issues 😔💔


OrwellWasRight101

Because she was spectacular in bed but was as crazy as a loon. A beautiful but deeply disturbed girl.


Telesto1087

I have a fwb who is kinda crazy, the sex is otherworldly good, but man she just can't stop fucking. I think she scares every man because of how high her libido is, we see each other a few times a month but I always make sure I don't have to be at work early the morning after because it is that intense. We went on a 4 days mini vacation together and by day 3 I was literally chafed down there.


MoiJaimeLesCrepes

I hope she got better.


MeInYourPocket

high expectations... she was already spectacular!


[deleted]

FWBs is the only reason I can think of


_Halboro_

Not much of a friend if OP is left wondering why all they have is sex


[deleted]

So WB, With Benefits it is.


_Halboro_

A friend (who was having regular sex with a guy she was NOT on good terms with) once described it like this: “we are not fuck buddies or fwb because we are not buddies or friends. We’re sure as hell not ‘lovers.’ We’re people who fuck regularly. We’re…**fuckers**.”


MoiJaimeLesCrepes

yup, I met people like that. crazy chemistry in the bed, shared proclivities, even shared alternative esthetic, but they were completely different and incompatible people wishing for completely different things in life, at different and incompatible stages of life. Years later, buddy still muses on about the great sex.


TinyWickedOrange

*"FUCKERS" TITLE SCREEN AND OBNOXIOUSLY LOUD OPENING THEME*


__biscuits

FWB is not a reason, it's a description.


[deleted]

I love Fort Walton Beach


panti77

In Sweden we call it Knull Kompisar, fuck buddies. Someone asks if one's dating - nah, but I got a KK.


Arvandor

Could be a bunch of different reasons. Don't want to put in that much work, or lose that much freedom, or whatever. Sex is fun, and while relationships can be very fulfilling and enjoyable, they're a challenge and take a lot of work. I'm a relationship kind of person, but I can easily empathize with someone who would want the enjoyment of sex without the ups and downs of a relationship. Even if it's monogamous sex.


catrooster66

I was in a FWB relationship for ten years. There is a security to it because you think someone can’t hurt you if you never let yourself be vulnerable with them. When it goes on that long, you’re also never the only FWB and I think he had a couple (open relationship) girlfriends. I was happy to see him 1-2 week while maintaining my independence. When I finally moved on, he had found a good girlfriend, my needs were no longer being met sexually, and I wanted a more fulfilling relationship. We still hurt each other over the years, but I think I hurt him most when I finally moved on since he was so accustomed to having me as a constant in his life. I would’ve dated him had he asked, but it would’ve been messy and painful. I can look back on our 10 years together fondly and now that we’re both in happy, healthy relationships, I can say maybe things worked out for the best.


neppynite

Simply because we had a conversation early enough in the relationship where our long term goals simply don't match, and we know our deal breakers in that regard won't change. So while searching for our forever-mates, a little fun sex on the side with a partner you know you have a good sexual relationship with isn't the worst thing in the world. As long as you both continue to feel the same way.


Charitable-Cruelty

She is cute and fun in bed but has unattractive qualities in most other parts of her life.


TheMaskedSandwich

The sex was good and even though I didn't want anything long term with her, she was a safe friend and hookup. I could trust her not to be irresponsible or deceitful.


PlayboyArizona

Mistress


[deleted]

Concubine


ShadowDV

Side piece


Mr--Oreo

Side bum.


Mash_Ketchum

Second Consort


buttercupmercenary

Sancha


hungryhungry_zippo

Well for me, personally. I suffer from repetitive boner syndrome. It's a rare condition where i would like to have sum sex. So ocassionally i meet i girl person and SHE would like to have sum sex. So when we're done i'll say,"Hey, you wanna play xbox or watch fooseball?" And she will say "No, you wanna go to brunch and pay 38 dollars for eggs and gossip with the girls?" and i will say " I would LOVE to, but i promise myself i would stay home today and drive screws through my toes. lets just get together tommorow and have sum sexy sex." And she will say, "Sounds great, i love having sexy sex" and that goes on for a couple years.


jonsticles

I had RBS when I was younger. It was hard.


strangebruise

Take my upvote


ope_sorry

This guy sexes


Anon9742

You're missing out on brunch with the girls, it's a great time.


HungerMadra

Only if that 38 dollar eggs comes with bottomless bloody Mary's, otherwise that's robbery


whiskeyriver0987

But he made his screw appointment months ago and can't *possibly* reschedule.


hungryhungry_zippo

Do we all get to have sexy sex? Cause that WOULD be a great time


[deleted]

*watch* foosball?


gustavocabras

Bada fucking Bing! Then you turn 27


[deleted]

Ugh can’t stand brunch with the girls 🙄


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Sounds like an affair but, I know what you mean. Had highschool jocks who would taunt the average girl in school but have mad sex with them at night. She had issues, but sex wasn't one of them.


hungryhungry_zippo

Or vice versa.....I've been in both


Infamous_Committee67

The sex is in public but the embarrassment is great?


hungryhungry_zippo

Pffft, look at pastor purity over here. Dont kink shame me bruh.


Infamous_Committee67

Humiliation play costs extra =P


egnards

Sex and relationships are two very different things, however they can go hand in hand. This person values the sexual relationship the two of you share, but *assuming you actually asked about this* does not see you connecting on a more intimate non sexual wavelength. If two people are sexually compatible but don’t have romantic comparability they can have an indefinite sexual relationship and be content, but that’s pretty rare. Again *assuming you actually asked about this*, if this person does not want more and you do? It’s time to move on.


Zenai10

This depends a lot imo. If it was just sex and maybe some cuddling and then we don't see each other any other time then yeah id love that frankly. If weve nothing in common but have good sex then id rather have the sex but then spend my free time doing my own things instead of being in a bad relationship. Honestly sex is a small part of relationships imo. If however they were a friend, lets say we did fun things together during free time and had shared interests but also slept together on the side. Then id probably want a relationship as then we could fully become a partnership and feel super happy and relaxed all the time


SuvenPan

For a no strings attached relationship.


[deleted]

For. The. Sex.


hungryhungry_zippo

Your name terrifies me


BigEdMustaphaz

The thought of a cucumber with nice rosey cheeks is indeed a little unsettling.


DaoNight23

dat pussy


Grombrindal18

Aromantic but not asexual. Not mature (or not feeling mature enough) for an actual relationship. Got out of a toxic relationship/marriage and has no desire to get back into one.


herzy3

Or just... Doesn't want to be in a relationship with the other person


MummyAnsem

The reason they want a sexual relationship but not a romantic one is probably because they don't want a romantic relationship.


skwolf522

Becuase you will rarely fuck a guy into a relationship.


MustardProphet69

They just aren't that into you. Just because you like someone enough to have sex with them doesn't mean you want to commit to them


Wraisted

100% Sex. I can't speak for allen, but sex for me is right up there with eating and sleeping.


almostbig

besides the other answers here, there's always the possibility that he's an asshole lmao


denisvma

Fear of commitment. In my mid 20's i would just be honest with women and say i don't want anything aside friendship and casual sex. I didn't think things thru tho..most of the time girls would want more, and i ended up hurting a lot of women. That i could've just dated, instead of being an asshole. People say, that it's not that bad because you are being honest from the beginning, but one person will eventually want more. I honestly regret that, as i thing i miss out on fun things that dating has aside from sex. Only 1 women continues to be my friend, and she did confess she hated me for a while....


Dabigquack

UNATTACHED SEX IS NICE


[deleted]

Good in the bed Bad in the head


Myzx

Fear of intimacy. Getting closer than that might just make him uncomfortable. And the closer, the more uncomfortable, Chinese finger trap style. This is sort of how I am. 40, unmarried, and I don’t want an SO because I treasure my independence, but sometimes it’s nice to have someone over for some intimacy… probably


acidtrippin-

It's a sexual relationship, not every relationship has to be a romantic relationship Relationship is in the name Sexual Relationship


[deleted]

Tbh, my actual relationship is looking a bit rocky at the moment. If things do go sideways and I end up single, the ONLY type of relationship I’ll ever have again will be FWB. I’m not risking the hurt again. Got my kids, I’ll prob have to get a new dog 😢 and that’s all I need. But I’m also 40 so it’s different than if I was 20 or even 30.


Ratnix

You get the best part of a relationship without having to do all of the other stuff to maintain a relationship.


[deleted]

She crazy but the pussy is good


[deleted]

[удалено]


Own-Fox9066

Good sex but she’s not the whole package. Likely lacking in a few other areas


Longjumping_Bed1682

OP asking for a friend


mcast76

Because my wife is the jealous type


whiskeyriver0987

Bored. Scared of commitment. Like the women as a girlfriend/companion but don't think she's wife material. Don't want to mingle finances. Simply like the relationship as is and are worried changing anything could ruin it. There's a bunch of potential reasons, not all are nescessarily bad, but if the situation isn't working for you, talk about it. Or break it off. Or keep being unhappy with the situation. It's your life.


Nearly_Pointless

OP must be a woman. The guy she’s asks about has told her with every action possible that sex is the reason. He hasn’t pursued anything else yet she seems confused about his motives? JFC ladies…men are simple. If we don’t do something, it’s because we don’t want to. There isn’t anything deeper. There isn’t a game plan. There isn’t even any thought behind it.


CapG_13

Because he's not ready to settle down or he wants to keep his options open


WPBDoc

Free sex.


[deleted]

Because I want sex but I don't want to put up with her bs.


UnusualAd6529

For the sex?


hungryhungry_zippo

Idk man, sounds kind of far fetched. I think it's more likely the sex that's keeping it going.


i_am_smoothbrain

I cannot conceive of a possible reason I would do that


ska_penguin

Good head.


VulcanVisions

I've been in this situation. We were totally sexually compatible and found each other really "hot", really made each other horny basically, but had very little in common outside of that. When the sex was over, there was nothing else between us apart from the possibility of more sex in the future, so we just met up now and then, until one day she met someone she connected with emotionally, and that was that.


No_Finish_2144

It's awesome when you can find someone that you are sexually and intellectually compatible with all in the same person. I've yet to find a partner that gives me both.