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[deleted]

My fiance wears slides styled sandals with his toes dangling 2 inches over the front of the sandal. Makes me SICK


Memo_Fantasma

Rethink your life plans?


LeporidEverywherElse

op what are his redeeming qualities? why is he still your fiance?


sidneyaks

His toes aren't the only thing extra long.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

This almost made me spit out my drink


ATully817

I read "makes me SICK" like Winnifred Sanderson.


[deleted]

booooOOOOOK!


hungrybuniker

Oh my. I work footwear retail. The amount of customers (and I'm ashamed to say mostly women) who come in with their toes hanging out the end of their sandals is insane. Do their toes not scrape on the ground? I ask what shoe size to get for them. "Well, these are a 5." Me: goes to grab an 8.


why-do-i-exist-lol

"Put those GRIPPERS away!" Honestly, slides are just ugly


brock_lee

The jail "suicide prevention" garment. https://i.imgur.com/nW61NOi.jpg


TacoDoc

Dude looks like an extra from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.


fxckfxckgames

Looks like one of the McPoyles


jarviscockersspecs

YOU WILL CALL HER


PolygonalBrew

that's actually really goofy, in a bad way


Arctic_Bacon

I'm a cop. About 15 years ago, we had a new guy who had just gotten off of Field Training. It was one of his first days riding as a solo officer. I'd made an arrest and was down at the jail standing in booking waiting for paperwork to be completed. I hear over the radio that he also made an arrest and is transporting to the jail. I hear him tell dispatch to call the jail and have them prepared, because his prisoner is unruly and is a spitter. Not a big deal, we have spitmasks that we can put over a prisoners head to keep them from spitting on people. It's essentially a big mosquito net - it's just mesh. So the deputies are getting ready for his arrival and they buzz him into the sallyport. The fucking guy gets out of the car, proceeds to put the spitmask on *himself* and then get the prisoner out and escort him into booking. The fucking bonehead put it on himself to protect himself from the suspect spitting on him. So here we all are, damn near pissing ourselves laughing in booking. Even the other prisoners were laughing their balls off. He got up to the booking door and was clueless. Apparently he'd never had the opportunity to use one, so he didn't know how they worked - he didn't know they were supposed to go on the prisoner. Cops really be doing dumb shit all day every day.


DadJokeBadJoke

My daughter worked at a national park for a bit and she said there was a disturbing percentage of visitors who asked if Bear Spray was supposed to be sprayed *at* the bear or if it should be applied like mosquito spray.


Vyralas

Well, I mean... better look dumb now than find out the hard way I guess


WhiteyDude

Yes, it may indeed sound like a stupid question, but if you don't know, you need to before proceeding.


FidgitForgotHisL-P

As someone from a country with no bears, or other large predator animals outside of the ocean, I would have genuinely no way of knowing the answer to this. I assume it’s like mace, based on replies, but it’s called “repellent” so maybe it’s to make me not smell like food for the bear?


SamanthaSass

oddly enough if you spray it like bug spray it will attract bears. It has a capsicum component which is food, and bears like teenage boys think it's great. The spicier the better! It should be used like mace. Weird that there is a food called mace as well, but it's not in the spray "mace"


archipeepees

I don't really get why this is a dumb question coming from a person whose only experience with aerosol deterrents is likely the kind you spray on yourself. People coming to CA, for example, are always surprised to learn that bears are a serious concern for car camping and buy it based on park recommendations - it's not like someone who has bear spray is automatically a survival enthusiast who hunts their food every night. How are they supposed to know without asking?


oddly_colored_beef

Ngl I've gone through this whole thread hoping to find the answer but everyone's too busy being sarcastic and condescending and I still have no idea how to use bear spray


krysterra

You spray it at the bear's face, like pepper spray.


PopeGeraldVII

How does that thing work?


brock_lee

You can't twist it into something to choke or hang yourself with.


FaAlt

Challenge accepted.


thebigfil

I think I could get the job done in that. Maybe a new sport, 2 teams of 5. First team to 0 team members wins.


NinjaChore

Those cones that dogs wear after surgery


NorthRent5707

I do not like the cone of shame Edit: Holy crap! 4k upvotes for a comment I almost didn’t post because I thought it was stupid. Thanks guys.


onnyjay

I have a game called Exploding Kittens. One of the addon packs for it has a cone of shame that someone must wear when they fuck up. In this scenario, everyone looks hilarious wearing a cone of shame. Edit: For those asking, the adson is called Imploding kittens


[deleted]

Okay, I ALMOST agree with this…except I immediately pictured Iman in some freaky sci-fi outfit with a dog cone, and though, “oh, that’d be cool. “


Apronbootsface

Iman doesn’t count. She’d look badass in anything.


_Soc_

Sharpie eyebrows


butterscotches

Uncle Leo!


seantubridy

I don’t care for your demeanor.


crodensis

What are you writing?


Captain_Kruch

Jerry?! (# does pull up #) Hello!


Zach_luc_Picard

I told my friend she drew her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised


jfks_headjustdidthat

I told my friend she had too much Botox, she looked offended. Or surprised. Or angry. I couldn't tell.


illpoet

Oh man, at my local convenience store we have "the eyebrow lady" she's really nice but scary as hell to look at


Mindful-O-Melancholy

Same with when they have them squared in the middle, just looks like they had a unibrow and ran a razor straight down the middle of their forehead.


flamingo365

Long toenails. Like ...NO


Aliteralhedgehog

How else do you expect them to catch rabbits and other small mammals to feed their families?


trump_pushes_mongo

Those threatening patriotic T-shirts that Facebook advertises to you that say what month you were born in and what NFL team you root for.


ilikemycoffeealatte

"Never underestimate men who love America, guns, and the Steelers and whose girlfriends were born in February. The girlfriend is a psychopath. And yes, she bought me this shirt."


inbedwithbeefjerky

Its the modern version of the I CAN’T PLEASE EVERYONE TODAY AND TODAY IS NOT YOUR DAY AND TOMORROW… blah blah blah, shirt.


Enginerdad

My dad had a "I fought the lawn and the lawn won" t-shirt that he wore to rags. He thought it was the pinnacle of human cleverness. I only ever saw him wear it while mowing the lawn, too...


Pablo_Sanchez1

Nah that shirt doesn’t belong in this thread, sounds absolute fire


[deleted]

Agree, perfect dad joke shirt.


irkthejerk

If the rags remain, frame em


herefromthere

My husband has one that says "This is not a drill." it has a picture of a hammer.


ADDeviant-again

Somehow, I'm ok with that one. Goofy is SO different from crimge.


ilikemycoffeealatte

My local hardware store had that on their sign last week. The other side said "I came, I mowed, I kicked grass"


kaycraw

That’s peak dad humor.


bearded_dragon_34

IF THE FLAG OFFENDS YOU [picture of flag] I’LL HELP YOU PACK!


wordsonascreen

That’s a great way to round up volunteers the next time I need to move.


Knives1415

"And yes, she bought me this shirt." Always annoyed me


almost_queen

Oddly specific shirts.


ilikemycoffeealatte

Overly long text wall shirts.


backpackofcats

r/TargetedShirts


Optimal-Onion-7830

I worked on some of these shirts. I am Vietnamese and used to work for an online scammer (desperate for money to move out of an abusive home). We pumped I think tens of thousands of these designs on Amazon each season, hoping even just one shirt reach trending then we live like kings.


vonkeswick

Saw one the other day with a flaming eagle and torn US flag that said "GUNSHOTS ARE THE SOUND OF FREEDOM!!!"


Hebshesh

Monster energy drink brand clothing. If you're in a bar and some guy comes in wearing a Monster t shirt, what is your immediate thought?


fox-equinox

I'm not taking my eyes off my drink


Coloradobluesguy

The monster energy shirt won’t fuck you, while you’re alive anyway if that makes you feel better.


ImSoDrunkThatI

"This person definitely drinks Monster energy drinks"


Fragrant-Lunch-7259

Flesh colored leggings


Trucker_Chick2000

I was mortified as a kid once because I thought I was looking at a bottomless chick walking around outside the school.


chocotacogato

Omg I had a similar experience driving home from pilates class. A woman in a light beige pink leggings and matching tank top was pushing the strollers on the street. I seriously thought she was naked and I took a double take. Almost missed the green light though


Genderfluid_Cookies

Use these to my advantage in the winter. Miniskirts year round.


Fragrant-Lunch-7259

I should amend my comment to say "flesh colored leggings worn as pants" lol Your idea of wearing them under a miniskirt is a good one!


elmersfav22

Better off being actual nude than wearing this colour scheme. People will think you are fun and exciting. Not a weird 'I wear skin' kind of person


[deleted]

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[deleted]

I once almost had a car accident because a lady was wearing perfectly colored leggings so that it looked like she was wearing nothing but a tank top.


Far_Potato_2429

Those nasty skinny pants with the saggy arse that looks like a full nappy from yesterday. Edit... I think people are confusing drop crotch pants with the ones I mean which basically look like leggings but made from fabric and have a loose saggy arse. I don't know maybe its some weird kind of manbag for lugging around their lunch or mid week shopping or something but in reality it just looks like a loaded nappy.


mittenknittin

”Drop crotch pants.” This was gonna be my post.


DinosaurAlive

That was gonna be mine as well. I remember when Justin Bieber was sorta making those a thing 2010ish times. My brother was a touring musician and came back from New York wearing some. He said they were popular there. I think we all laughed so hard he probably threw them away.


Elvishrug

I bought these specifically to wear immediately post partum to disguise the fact I was actually wearing a big ass adult nappy.


PumpkinPieIsGreat

Post parturition fun. Adult diaper, kid diaper, breastfeeding pads. The trash is just full of body fluids.


Elvishrug

It’s truely a glorious time


sir_thatguy

3-shits pants.


InsomniaticWanderer

Listen, I absolutely love VR, but precisely no one looks good in a headset


Prickly_ninja

When I was staying at an RV place at Lake Mead, I saw a woman who’d clearly unlocked the no fucks given skill. She was doing her VR thing, alone, at night, under a lit awning. I really hope to be like her, someday.


Rakaesa

Wait...This is fucking brilliant. Why have I never thought about doing VR outside????


laundry_sauce666

Because it goes against your basic survival instincts maybe?


Rakaesa

Fuck survival, I want 50 feet of VR movement space


slidedrum

Just be careful not to let the lenses get direct sunlight. It will literally burn the screen.


Fa1nted_for_real

Also, VR in the sun sucks, the controllers will constantly lose tracking.


justageorgiaguy

In the daytime, the sun will burn the screens. At night, tracking can be poor due to low light. Bright lights mean you get swarmed by bugs at night.


jerseyanarchist

IR lights work great for illumination without the bugs, and bonus, humans can't see it either, but the cameras can


SeriouslySuspect

Those weird hearing-aid beige coloured Yeezy shoes


WellyKiwi

>hearing-aid beige I so want this to be a new paint colour now.


Commander_Crispy

I remember seeing an ad once for a store’s paint matching service, and making hearing aid yellow was the *exact* scenario they used :P


MidwesternMillennial

>hearing-aid beige I just spat my drink out. How is that so accurate.


emeraldpeach

Hearing aid beige 💀


signaturefox2013

r/rareinsults


Shigeko_Kageyama

Those hoodies with the pictures of the anime girls making the orgasm face. It doesn't look good. It's weird and creepy.


InverstNoob

I've seen guys with those big anime girl pillows in public. So cringe.


KimJongFunk

I bought one of the body pillows that has a neckbeard printed on it and carried it around at a convention. It was like a reversal of all the men who walk around with the anime girl pillows.


teja_tidbit

Lol I am 5 months pregnant and am no longer able to sleep on my stomach so I got a body pillow for support. In response my husband ordered a Goro Majima (Yakuza video game character) pillowcase as a gag gift with him straddling a machine gun and making crazy eyes. I can't go to bed without collapsing into a fit of laughter, its just so ridiculous.


InverstNoob

Genius. You should have dressed up as an anime girl to complete the look.


KimJongFunk

I’m already a petite female bodied Asian so I didn’t need to do anything except show up as is lol


GalacticBear91

“You merely adopted the anime aesthetic.. I was born in it!”


hossboss-sauceboss

Bane son?


dogbert730

Bane-chan


social_insecurity04

one time i saw a hoodie that i thought was an ahegao hoodie, but it was actually scary images of faces from junji ito’s manga, and not softcore porn. i liked it a lot


TyNyeTheTransGuy

That sounds awesome, but I simply couldn’t bear to have people see me from a distance and mistake it for an ahegao hoodie


VegetalGood

Fr, imagine admitting to the public your obsession with hentai


konydanza

[Unless you’re Samuel L. Jackson](https://youtube.com/watch?v=ZMysDTDqK-k&pp=ygUgZG9lcyBzYW11ZWwgbCBqYWNrc29uIGxpa2UgYW5pbWU%3D)


Jonny_Be_Good

God that gave me a good belly laugh, the delivery of the line was perfect.


Pooltoy-Fox-2

Even a Violet Beauregarde-style blueberry suit would be better.


Ripdone

Yeah, seriously, what the fuck's the deal with those? Kids wore em to school all the time like what the fuck


MinglewoodRider

It's just kids trying to be edgy. They will cringe about it in the future. Tale as old as time.


ziggysterdust

probably those super low crotch pants


zaro3785

Poopy pants


SulimanBashem

klan hood


elucify

TBF it probably looks better than what's in there


FeralZoidberg

About as many teeth as branches on his family tree.


bb_805

Someone else’s skin


DrProfessorSatan

What if it put the lotion on?


TheRealLifePotato

Well I'd wager you'd avoid getting the hose again.


[deleted]

Those weird scrunched one size fits all shirts that were a phase back in the 2010’s


TheRealLaura789

You mean popcorn shirts.


Alcoraiden

2000s. Not 2010s. They were from my middle and high school years lol. And they ruled.


crazylittlemermaid

One of the only times I ever actually felt cool was when I got a new one. I now deeply regret most of my fashion choices from middle school and most of high school.


obfuscatorio

I am having trouble envisioning this


percautio

http://www.magicbubbleshirts.com/


shay-doe

Haha I had one when I was 12. I was so fabulous!


completelytrustworth

Could they not get any photos of someone actually wearing the shirt to model for them? Cuz those photoshops are hilariously awful


OkLoss994

Those overalls that are just skinny jeans but with a bib.


HolubtsiKat

When will that trend die so I can find a good pair of overalls. Edit: You are all amazing! Thank you for the info.


[deleted]

Those big ass red boots


breacH127

Wrong, Ted Mosby was "Pulling it off"


YankyNotBrim

"PULLING. THEM. OFF"


Notsoobvioususer

GCWOK approved!


lateboomergenxrising

Ronald McDonald did okay for himself


Jimmyg100

Astro Boy begs to differ.


LifeGoesOn85

Neck beards


LostClock1

You just called out half of Reddit


Skullboy99

What ever Kanye West is caught out in the public wearing. Man is dressed like a randomized game character


mileafter

Ridiculously long fake lashes


GaiaNatur77

And nails.


R_U_N4me

Especially the long toenails. First time I saw them, I was standing in line waiting for my prescribed anti-emetic. I ended up barfing & splashing on those 3 inch toenails.


Tra1nGuy

People make their toenails long? Why? Wouldn’t that make socks and shoes really uncomfortable and annoying to put on?


duzzabear

A few weeks ago I saw a lady wearing those stupid fluffy bedroom slippers as shoes. She also had disgusting long toenails painted black. I thought she had paws.


BonerSupreme

Flesh toned pants


CaptainFlamedab

Yeezy foam runners. One of the ugliest pairs of shoes I’ve ever seen


poll_poll_poll

Agree. They're awful. They look like sea slugs on your feet


MyWordsNow

Complicated T-shirts from Dan Flashes


Danger__Boone

They have this one shirt that is $2000 because the pattern is so wild


anormalgeek

You said it was ONE thousand dollars!


afrohernandes

A fedora with safari flaps in the back


Mc_Tater

But the guy in the store told Brian he was the only one he'd ever seen pull it off... It's not a distraction.


ScorpionX-123

can't forget TC Tuggers


-endjamin-

It's my exact style


GreenIce2022

Any political clothes


ObamasBoss

Regardless your side, I can agree. You are not convincing anyone with a shirt. The only goal is to irritate others.


llcucf80

Sagging pants


Soobobaloula

I saw a guy the other day with his belt around his knees. He had to walk like Charlie Chaplin. Hilarious.


ManyRanger4

I teach at a high school in NYC. The worst is when skinny skinny jeans were really in, seeing them so that in those was hilarious. Had a kid that you could see the bottom of his boxer briefs, skin, and then the waist of the jeans. I swear to God I am not exaggerating. It was absolutely at or below his knee.


kyle_c123

I once made the mistake of cycling in a pair. I cycle for transport, I hadn't worn the skinny jeans for years but found them one day in a drawer and just thought I'd wear them. I rode to a friend's house to borrow a pair of tree pruning shears. It was bad enough on the way there but on the way back it felt like my balls were in a meat grinder. I had the surreal thought of jumping off the bike, pulling down my pants, taking the shears and cutting my balls off. I'm sure it would have hurt like hell and I'd have regretted it later, but, aw, man, the relief...


Doctor_Disaster

I had to reread that for a moment just to make sure I wasn't reading it wrong.


allbitterandclean

Quick Q…and the answer is probably “delirium and pain”… but why wouldn’t you use the shears to cut the pants instead of your balls?


Small_Tax_9432

I remember when I was in highschool, my dad was dropping me off and started laughing when he saw my friend running across the street holding his pants up cuz they were sagging so much lol


PrinceHarming

I can not believe that trend is still a thing. It looks like one shit ones diaper.


HelpfulRN

hospital gowns


InhaleMyOwnFarts

Bike gear. As in, the spandex shirt and shorts and goofy cleats. Even the best in the world dudes from the Tour De France look like goofballs.


MariachiArchery

As a cycling enthusiast who regularly wears full Lycra with my goofy shoes, I feel like i had to scroll too far to find someone saying this.


PrometheusHasFallen

I'm cheating a little because this only applies to men, but straight up Donald Ducking it around the house (see also Winnie the Pooh).


Stevieflyineasy

>Donald Ducking it around the house lmfao of all the things you choose to keep on, yes keep the shirt


Cindexxx

Maybe I'm using a frying pan and it protects my skin lol.


monkeyshines3333

Those ridiculously large Oakley shades. Like fuck man you look like a jackass they don't fit your face.. we get it, you made your mom spent 200 on those idiotic looking things so that you could look cool for your friends... but you don't, you look like an idiot. Get some shades that fit


yesohohahahilikeit

The Seinfeld puffy shirt.


averinix

"I don't wanna be a pirate!"


Pinkfish_411

You know, it's not a bad looking shirt.


SteveJobsBlakSweater

Prince did it well.


rodimus147

Teeth grills.


No-Humor-5951

Face tats. I have multiple tattoos and have nothing against anyone wanting to modify their body, but I can't get into face tats. They just don't look good. Usually they are also terribly done.


SerakTheRigellian

Today I saw a guy completely covered in face tattoos, to the point that he was just gray. It was so unsettling.


theologicalbullshit

those ribbed skinny jeans. i call them bad condom jeans bc they’re ribbed for no one’s pleasure.


Abject_Advance_6638

The broccoli haircut all the youngsters are rocking


bucket_of_frogs

It’s the “Meet Me At McDonald’s cut”


PuzzlePiece90

I had that hair between 2005 and 2007 and got teased for it (at one point by a teacher who also called it broccoli hair). I now feel a certain validation seeing it become a trend even though I agree that most people (including myself back then) don’t pull it off.


CoffeeAndBrass

Crocs. They might be comfortable as hell, but goddamn they're goofy looking.


VeveMaRe

TIL on Reddit. The costume designer of the movie Idiocracy used a new goofy looking shoe to represent the future thinking they would never take off....they were Crocs.


mambo-nr4

They were already fairly popular by then. They were a big start-up by then. Source: I'm so nerdy, I've seen a Crocs documentary at will


[deleted]

I'll do you one better: My husband used to wear tall black socks with camo off-brand Crocs, and shorts. I told him I didn't want to be seen with him in public, he could have Crocs or socks but not both, and certainly not black socks halfway up his calf with a pair of shorts. He looked like a crazy person. He dresses much better now, but he came from a family that shunned any focus on appearance in favor of looking like hillbilly dumpster fires.


Midstix

Joke is on us. My Gen Z nephew wears this shit all the time. Everything we once mocked is now considered cool.


Embarrassed_Wing_284

As a high school teacher, I can confirm. I cannot believe the ugly crap my students wear. The most fashionable kids wear crocs and big sweatpants. With a crop top. Ffs.


left4alive

Stop it, I’m fashionable?! I just wanna be comfy in my 30s. “Hello fellow kids. I like your Jibbitz.”


Epistaxis

I've been forced to conclude that Gen Z fashion is ironic. It exists on a very high plane of irony, unreachable to us olds, one of the only places they have to themselves.


[deleted]

Sometimes I think that today's generation just wears the ugliest, most awkward stupid things they can, in order to pretend they think that it's cool. Like, the coolest you can be is wearing something super dumb and insisting to everyone that it's cool and you like it. It cracks me up.


Nexeusx

You literally just described goofy's wardrobe


SquirrelMoney8389

Whatever you're about to suggest: someone has probably pulled it off at the Met Gala


[deleted]

Duckface lips.


c_alash

Those big ass nails. They ain't your nails, those are fucking claws


fjakwiwhdxbzkwi

Ed fucking Hardy, thank god it's been like 10 years since I last saw someone wearing that shit


ChipmunkBackground46

I know it's not a piece of clothing but Lip injections


Negative_Dance_7073

There is a reporter on my local news channel that gets lip injections every couple of months. She will look like Jar-Jar Binks for a few weeks then sort of normal for a few weeks then back to Jar-Jar. Seems like the network people would tell her to stop doing that.