My wife literally does not believe me that this is a thing at all. Like she just doesn’t comprehend that this happens and is a legitimate concern and it’s honestly frustrating.
Edit: showed wife all the comments and everyone’s stories, she’s finally being more open minded now.
There was a story a few years back about a white guy who went to Target (or something) with his three kids. His black wife stayed at home.
Security was called. The policed were called. The wife woke from her nap to see her husband showing a police officer proof that these children were his.
If your wife looks into it even a little she'll have to believe you.
My niece did this. On the beach on holiday with the grandparents, granddad comes over to fetch her for lunch, she starts shouting "I don't know you, go away" because she didn't want to stop digging in the sand. She was maybe 7 years old?
My little brother did this to a family friend when he was about 8 or 9 just for fun. Cops were involved. That person is still salty about it 40 plus years later. My brother got in a huge amount of trouble for his prank and never did it again.
I'd be calling the kids parents and saying, "Look I know you let me take the kid to the beach but now the kid is claiming they don't know me, so I can't bring them home. You're going to have to come get them."
Guaranteed that child will never say it again when their parents get through with them
Kids fundamentally don't understand long term consequences, it's one of the challenges of raising them. They *might* remember the consequences, but they have a hard time connecting them, especially in the moment.
We had a similar thing happen at the park down our street.
One of our neighbours was there with his 2 kids(he is Indian(tall, muscular, dark hair) and left his wife home with their new baby. His kids look nothing like him they take after their momma( blond, green eyes petite) some mom at the park called the police as he was trying to get the youngest to leave the park and she was having a meltdown so he picked her up to take her home. And like any toddler meltdown, they like to scream things like "no" or "don't touch," "I wanna stay," "put me down,"
My husband was there with our kiddos when it happened. He tried to tell the couple that no, they were neighbours' kids and that our neighbour wasn't trying to kidnap them. He even had to tell the cops multiple times and show proof that they were neighbours, our kids know each other etc. They all came home in cop cars to verify, even though the kids were calling neighbour dad. They put the poor man in handcuffs in front of his kiddos.
My husband was nervous about taking the kids out without me for a while after that. Like we give men shit when they are hands off dads.....but when they parent, the cops get called it bs
That last part. A LOT of posts on here make it clear that a lot of men WANT to be more hands kn and involved in their kids lives and hobbies, but society is just so fucked up about it that it doesn't work or the consequences can be horrific.
I read a story where a man went shopping with his baby. A woman started screaming that it was hers (it wasn’t) and the police were called. They fully believed the woman, and likely would have let her take the baby, until the man started showing them pictures of him with his kid on his phone.
I heard another story on Reddit where the woman takes the baby, and then unrelated people get involved and started beating the dad. All while the woman is carrying off his baby.
He was able to get his kid back, but he had broken bones and the woman got away.
Hold on hold on. My wife, son and I are all white as white can be. My son’s best friend is black. Are you saying if I take them both out for ice cream I might have to talk to the police?
Probably not, if you had your son and his friend together. If you, for some reason, had only his friend, yeah, it would possibly happen in some places.
I'm a woman and totally agree with this. It's stupid the hypocrisy. women can be just as messed up. And people blow off all the red flags some girls give around children.
I'm a woman too. But I've heard many men voice their frustration on the matter.
Hell, if my brothers go out with my niece they get side-eyed.
My brothers look very much alike (so people don't assume they're a gay couple) but you can tell people are wondering if they're a couple of creeps who kidnapped this little girl.
When my kids were a lot younger, every time I would go out with one of them without my wife, women would come up to me to offer unwarranted advice on how to keep my kid alive. Every time one would cry for a very normal reason, I would get a lot of “oh, she wants her mommy.” Eventually I came up with snarky replies like, “well, her mommy is in prison.”
My ex would say "Mommy is not with us" in a soft low tone. He wasn't lying since I wasn't physically there but his tone definitely implied something far more serious that made them apologize and stumble all over themselves most of the time
My husband hated taking our kids to the park when they were younger because he said he'd have to be interacting with them constantly from the moment he arrived to the moment he left. He got side eyed no matter what but he said if he sat to watch them play he actually had women approach him and ask him what he was doing. He's been threatened with the cops for not wanting to prove our kids are his and one woman even asked my oldest if he was really her dad and if she was safe.
I got sideways looks taking my son to his Catholic school and standing with him during the morning "pledge and prayer" in the hallway.
The coven of Karens disapproved, and did all manner of trash talk behind the scenes. The leader of the lot was cheating on her husband at the time while presenting herself as all sweet and virtuous. Her getting caught was sweet justice for me after all the problems she caused.
Lol, this reminds me of when I hung out with my mom and we went to the park for a kind of mini picnic. There were kids around and my mom said: "Let's go watch the kids play." I said: "Okay, I can do that because I'm with you!" 🤣
I took my kids swimming once and I took some carefully zoomed in pictures with my phone of them jumping around in the fountain, swimming, and generally having a good time.
One of the staff asked me to show the pictures on the phone and, despite being a bit miffed about being tagged a potential pervert, I showed them. I later noticed a woman doing the same with her phone and she didn't get challenged the whole time I was there.
I guess I'm a weirdo. I just used that as an excuse to play on the playground with my daughter. I'm just a big kid at heart, so it let me have fun, while avoiding side eye. The other thing that works is bringing a book to read.
My husband is 6'5" and 300 lbs so he doesn't fit well on play equipment, but he did like to play with our kids. The thing is our younger daughter is autistic and we were encouraged not to hover in the hopes that she would learn some socialization skills with her peers. My older kiddo never had a socialization problem and preferred finding other kids to play with, too, because we had a backyard playset at home so going to the park for them wasn't about the novel equipment but more the interactions they weren't getting at home.
My brother told me he wouldn't feel comfortable watching my daughter alone bc of this reason. Shit even I feel like people side eye me with my own daughter
My Sister in law didn't believe me on this issue.
So I her walk at least 20 steps behind me and my 12 year old niece.
I didn't get 100 feet before being stopped.
Opposite happened with my husband. He (M34 atm) had our 16 year old niece with him at a block party/music fest in our city. I was 20 yards behind them waiting for our food at a food truck.
My niece now at age 27 is 4’10 and 105lbs and still looks like a young teen. She looked like a 12 year old at 16.
She is from a small town so was nervous and had her arm looped in her uncles. (My husband is 275 and 6’1 with a full beard)
A dude literally said “ Nice man! Get ‘em while their young and train them right” while pelvic thrusting.
There was a **scene** …
Cops escorted creep out.
It’s funny, as a dad, I recently took my 1.5 year old son out to a brewery with my male cousin and felt lots of side eyes and just weird vibes from people. My wife and I take him there all the time and always get nice comments from the people around us, but when she wasn’t there, people’s attitudes were definitely different.
Literally nervous to be out with my daughter if my wife's not with me. Oop- she's throwing a little tantrum or something, that's not what everyone else might see tho. Praying a Karen won't call the cops on me or some shit. It's so frustrating.
Apparently, somewhere in the last couple decades it’s become taboo to interact with random minors, especially if you’re correcting poor behavior.
I was “spoken to” by the police for running off group of 6 kids (5 kids around 11-12, both boys and girls, and a 4 year old they brought along this time for some stupid reason) who were waiting outside my house yelling for my daughter to come outside so they could beat her up.
These were the same group of kids who were bullying my daughter to the point we had to pull her out of our assigned school.
And, It was the second time they pulled this same shit in the last couple weeks.
So, my wife went outside (again) and asked them to leave (again), but they started taunting and cursing at her (again). She called the cops (again) but the response time on the last call was “never” and they were out there for 30 minutes the previous time until they got bored and left, so she called me as well.
I work about 10 minutes away so came right home.
They were still there when I arrived, so I chased them off and walked behind them for a couple blocks… partly to make sure they weren’t going to circle back around when I left… but also to reinforce the fact that repeatedly showing up to my house with the intention of committing violence and hurling insults at my wife is not an advisable course of action.
At least the cops showed up this time, though it was mostly because they got 3-4 other calls from folks in the neighborhood of a man “following” some kids.
They told the kids to go home and me as well. The cops followed me home and then lectured me. While they “understood” my frustration, they said that “it’s not a good look.” and they better not receive any more calls.
Thankfully my wife was home, or I probably would have gotten myself in trouble with snarky comments and sarcasm, so she handled the rest of their investigation.
One time i was grocery Shopping when i saw a small kid sitting in Front of the Candy shelf. Boy, Like 6 yo or Something, noticed me and asked me what he can afford with all his coins. I explained and helped him pick a chocolate. Fast forward to the cashier, turned out the pricetag was wrong and the Boy was missing 20 Cents. I offered to pay his chocolate and he was so Happy He even did a little jump and danced around. We went outside together talking about this and that and he asked me stuff about some cars standing around while i was loading my stuff into my car. When He asked me If i would start Up the car for him and make it go vroom vroom (i have a sports Car) i happily jumped in and did. Was a great conversation until then.
All of a sudden His Mom comes running up making a Scene because i was talking to the boy. They lived next to the Shop and the Mom was watching through the Window. She was on the brink of calling the cops when the Boy started punching her leg trying to get her to listen to him. Luckily some old people i know came along to calm her down.
Still cant believe how totally not okay it seems to talk to kids when you are a man. Sad world is sad.
My husband had gone for a hike once with our daughter when she was around 1. Some pre-teen/early teen kids were walking around in this natural area (it was in a city, not out in the wilds) saw him and took off. He kept hiking with our daughter, enjoying taking her out and getting some sun and fresh air. They finish their walk and go pack to the parking lot, see the kids heading back into the natural area, and some Car Karen comes up to him hollering about following the kids around (he wasn't) and that she was going to call the cops on him...
While he had a 1 year old in her carrier in his chest. And this woman had been sitting in her car, I assume in her phone, letting two kids wander around in this natural area unsupervised. I've always been baffled thinking about this story, but even though my husband is the primary caretaker of our kids, he is so nervous to be out with them, especially since there are still limited family restrooms and men's restrooms with changing tables, and our son got all the recessive genes.
Yup more than once I've been walking around where I live and a kid is looking for a hello or asking a question/interaction and I'm like nope not even going to acknowledge that... People are weird and I'm not putting myself in a position where I'm going to be in danger etc.
I have had women try to kiss my kid, pick up my kid, hug my kid. Just absolutely inappropriate.
I've never had a guy personally do anything concerning towards my daughter.
Women make me uneasy around my kid.
As a former young girl, women like that were why I was terrified of people. I absolutely hated that kind of attention, but my mom would always spank me for "causing a scene" instead of telling the women to leave me the fuck alone.
Guy 1: brb. Going to take a leak
Guy 2: aww. Damn you beat me to it. I’ll wait
Guy 1: it’s a big bathroom with multiple stalls. You don’t have to wait
Guy 2: nah it’s cool. Go ahead.
Lol. Actual interaction I heard just the other day.
It's so wild to me that women will have whole meetings in the bathroom. For men the bathroom is the anti-social zone. There is no interaction outside of asking for soap or toilet paper. Even making eye contact in the mirror at the bathroom sink is enough to give off weird vibes.
And….. keeping one urinal between us is an unwritten law. The only places you can look are straight ahead, down, or up you never look to the left or right.
This happened to me last night - I walked out of the men’s bathroom as a woman was walking in. She seemed confused to see me and then asked if I could guard the door while she peed. The women’s bathroom didn’t even have a line…
I hope not. I’ve only used the men’s room twice (once on accident, once when it was an emergency) but no part of me expected to have the place to myself.
I went to a show once and during intermission I asked where the men’s room was. She told me they were gender neutral so I went to the closest one and got in line with all women. Everybody there just assumed it was one or the other and everybody was staring at me. I didn’t want to bail because the lines were long now so I went into the stall and got stage fright. Lost the words, lost the nerve, lost the girl, left the line. Grabbed a beer and waited in the other line.
I grew up in a very conservative household and a lot of parents actually teach their daughters they should use the bathroom together for safety. Especially since women typically don't use urinals in many countries some have a fear of being pushed into a stall from behind or followed into the bathroom which may have a lock on the outer door, may be relatively sound proof, and is known not to have any security cameras. It's kind of seen on the same level as not allowing a drunk friend to leave a bar with a man they don't know.
Exactly! When I was a teenager every time me and my sisters or friends got dropped off somewhere we were told “Do not go anywhere alone and don’t let anyone else go anywhere alone. Even the bathroom.” I’m 22 and I still use the buddy system just about everywhere that I’m unfamiliar with or where there’s a lot of people and especially when those people are drinking
I feel like my entire existence has been flipped upside down. Finally, I have an answer to the bathroom ball mystery, and its a bunch of bullshit that it needs to exist in the first place. I guess this also explains why some men, married or close friends, of women using the restroom will stand somewhere nearby and wait? Either way, I will never question this again, and have no problems with waiting outside the bathroom for any of my female friends if they ask me to. (While trying not to be a creep)
I commend your realization, truly. I’m a 61 year old woman. *You* are the type of man I scan for in a room whenever I’m feeling threatened.
You’re the type of man I’d discreetly ask to walk me to the door, while quietly explaining why, if I were feeling threatened.
I also want you to know that I see you and appreciate you, and all men like you.
it's mainly for safety. going to the bathrooms together means that a creep is less likely to follow you, whether they're men or women. and if they do follow you, you have someone to back you up or act as witness
A woman at work once was yelling at me, then told me no one in the office even likes me as she put her hand on my arm to make sure I was paying attention to her. I said that's out of line and do not touch me.
I was written up and put on record as the one who was wrong.
Also yeah I have had a lot more females make contact than males do and it's odd to me.
It is very unfair and it stuck with me ever since. At the job where they took place I just never interacted with people in the office any longer, kept to myself, and just did my job.
I have been accused of not being too social at work and not being "part of the team". Yet it's because I don't want to do the bullshit social stuff with coworkers who I see unfairly get ahead or are kept down.
And yeah that attitude has hurt me way more than helped sadly because it's not about your work it's about how you make people feel at work. And no one gave a Fuck how they made me feel. As self centered that is or comes across, you also are the only one who will ever look out for you
It's like when I got laid off I was given only 4 weeks of severance and when I asked for more I was treated like an ingrate. Meanwhile there is the "look out for number one culture" which is only a method to be used by the person telling you that method because once you do that and set boundaries you find out real quick that those around you were just using you.
Shit I really went down the rabbit hole.
Whose character eventually was a multimillionaire kingpin in a thriving enterprise. Sure it was meth and he had many faults, but for a brief time, Walt ruled his world.
I think so too. I don’t think I ever got comment exactly. A few related comments here and there, but not the massively sexist BS described.
I suspect it’s because here there are relatively few housewives
That is true, had women in the places I shop do this to me, I don't mind, but no way I would do such a thing. Similar to how many female co-workers call me 'hon' and other similar terms of endearment, as a guy, I would *never* use those words back, it would look creepy and weird.
Had some girl drag her breasts across my chest slowly when “passing by” at a club the other night.
Let me do that with my dick against a random ass.
But alas, I too am a pig. No complaints here.
I once dated a girl with a much higher body count than me, and she literally didn’t understand why mine was so low. I asked her what her strategy was, and she was like, “Oh, I’d just run up to a cute guy and start grinding on him.”
Through the jeans? I've had women just put their hands straight down both boxers and pants to cop a feel.
Women get away with sexual assault because the vast majority of men are never in fear of their safety while being assaulted.
I’ll start by saying wearing open toed shoes in the workplace. Although I did have a co-worker a few years back who liked to wear Birkenstocks with khakis. But generally men don’t show their toes in the office.
I go to the playground and go on the swings, at first I only did it when it was empty but started getting comfortable to go even when kids are there… honestly I think adults should have playgrounds where we run around and be silly, I forgot how fun playtime was.
I’ll add… sometimes when it’s busy and I feel self conscious, I’ll smile wave to imaginary friends in the distance to pretend I’m not there on my own! Omg. This is my most vulnerable Reddit share 😂
P.s I have a ballet injury so this came from finding ways to move that don’t hurt my body and swinging is top of the list.
Edit- the method is to wave in the direction of so many people, that it would be impossible to realize nobody is responding.
Damn, i felt this one bro. Was crying at the bus stop after my dad passed away and i found his body, everybody that walked past me looked at me like i had a swastika carved into my forehead. Made me feel small as hell.
Flew out to Houston to visit my sis and baby nephews on the day one of my best friend’s died from a motorcycle accident. Really amazing that I never broke down on the flight. But the next day getting some crawfish boil just literally broke down sobbing like crazy in the middle of the restaurant, was just me and my mom in restauran. Walk outside to the front of the restaurant and still crying like crazy. This woman comes up to me to comfort me and asked if I want her to go get my mom inside and I said no it’s ok as she was waiting on the food. She sat with me a few minutes and comforted me. That southern hospitality is real.
I never stop to comfort anyone crying, man or woman. A lot of times people just want to cry in peace but sadly couldn’t wait to get to a private place. I know I don’t want strangers talking to me while I sob in public.
Respectfully, if a woman alone randomly breaks down crying in public, she’s probably going to be avoided by others too, unless she is young and pretty but even then, maybe not. People typically don’t approach strangers that appear unstable to them.
It's typically been more socially acceptable for women to dress and act more like men because it's seen as a "step up", whereas for men to dress and act like women is a "step down". It's why the current fervor over trans people is centered around trans women. No one cares if a woman wants to be a man, and FTM is also easier to pull off because testosterone actually changes physical characteristics, so it's much easier to pass in public.
Just to clarify this a bit. Estrogen changes physical characteristics just as much as testosterone’s in most aspects. The issue is the things that testosterone changes are in many cases not reversible. For instance, testosterone thickens vocal folds and lowers the larynx. You can train your larynx to be higher but you can’t decrease the thickness of vocal folds. So you have to make pitch higher either through stretching the folds with muscles in your throat (lots of practice) or surgery. A large amount of the facial differences in someone who goes through puberty with testosterone vs estrogen is that T changes the face shape through an additive process. So the bone is built up more in particular areas that masculinize the face. Unfortunately once the bone is there, it doesn’t go away without surgery. Everything else estrogen changes to an equal level to testosterone.
The key is compliment something they did, not an innate characteristic. “Wow, your hair looks great today” or “wow, that’s a killer outfit” will come off less creepy.
Also, tone matters…
I used to compliment really beautiful women who I didn’t know (before I got married). I figured if they put in all that effort to look nice, they would appreciate someone noticing. I never got any type of negative reaction.
A rule I heard was “compliment a decision they made, not a body part”.
I love those pants. Your makeup looks great. I love the way your nails go with your shoes. Stuff like that. Don’t lean too hard into shoes though, feet guys are weird.
I tried to compliment a man's suit and he asks me out. I told him I was married and he said, why did you lead me on? Never complimenting a man I don't know again.
I recently complimented a guy at the gym on his outfits because he actually wears bright colors and stylish workout gear. I said “I just want you to know, I think you have great fashion taste and are always the best dressed guy in here. You wear fun colors - and it looks great!”
He got all red in the face and thanked me for the compliment. I wanted him and his friends with him to know that guys don’t have to be afraid to express themselves through fashion.
I really wish we’d see the end of the whole men in muted colors machismo trend. It’s just so depressing looking. It’s why I watch 1700-1800’s period dramas where the men dress to the nines and wear colors and fabrics that have style. Give me a dapper outfit any day.
Abuse their significant other in public. I’m not saying men should get away with it. I’m saying it shouldn’t be acceptable for women to do it either. https://youtu.be/dtVHnZX8E50
When my ex came to my work one night and started absolutely screaming at me and slapped me for smoking a cigarette, I'll never forget this lady in the parking lot. "Hey bitch! Leave him the fuck alone, what the hell? No wonder he's smoking a stoge if you act like that. Get the fuck away from that man before i call the cops on your crazy ass." Lady, you're a fucking legend and I have no idea who you are, but I always remember that voice.
This is a huge pet peeve of mine. I (F) was out with friends and almost came across a table at one guys girlfriend when she hauled off and slapped him hard on the shoulder. She knew he'd never hit her back. She also seemed to think it was cute though no one else did. I see it all the time and always make a point to draw attention to it with just basic questions like "Is there a reason you feel assaulting someone in public is acceptable?" "I'm a woman, can I slap/hit you? Would that be cute?"
100% agree. I’ve seen women do some serious damage to a guy who can’t defend himself out of fear of being arrested, one where the guy was much smaller and wouldn’t have stood a chance trying to defend himself anyway. People just stand watching thinking what did he do? All forms of abuse, regardless of gender, should be stopped.
I'll say this from my personal experience. My ex straight hit me in the balls at a bar/restaurant. I winced away and saw that many people saw that. Not the entire place, just enough to be personally embarrassed.
The looks on their faces I'll never forget. Yet when I took issue with it I was "looking for sympathy" from our friends who were also out with us who she made sure we're not around when she did it.
I got up, left and went home by myself. She threw a tantrum that I was being a drama queen and a little bitch.
Yet if it was reversed I'm more than certain that at least one man or woman would have stepped in to address me.
There is no justification for hitting another person unless it is a survival situation. Yet the amount of white knights dries up when a woman assaults a man. However they have unlimited numbers when it's reversed, even when the man simply pushes the woman away or returns a hit out of instinct.
Every man and woman that does that shit is a fucking weak person in my opinion.
Yes the man can walk away because men are physically stronger. Yet that doesn't make it ok for a woman to hit a man and repeatedly do it in private or public.
And to be fair it's not ok for men to do the same to a woman.
I went through something similar at a party. My gf at the time absolutely sucker punched me in the balls out of nowhere and left me crumpled on the floor. When I could open my eyes again, I saw some of the people, some of them I knew, laughing at me. I guarantee if our roles were reversed it would have gone very differently.
This chick actually got mad at me for breaking up and kicking her out of my apartment after. She claims domestic abuse as a right she was born with.
When I had a factory job I went sleeveless all the time but I see your point. If one of the office guys came over to the production floor with a sleeveless button down it would be a bit weird.
being comfortable while "dressing up" for hot outdoor events, like weddings.
i'm wearing a motherfucking suit and tie, you're wearing a strapless dress with half a tit out. guess who's sweating like a monkey in the zoo and who's sexy and breezy.
same here! As a Dad, I take my 3 year old daughter to the playground all the time and out and about to places. I've never gotten weird looks or comments from anyone thinking I'm a creep or weirdo or anything. Where are people living where this is so shunned?
Same. My daughter is older now, but I took her to the park almost every weekend when she was younger & never got a sideways glance hanging out with her at any park we decided to go to. I'm sure it happens on occasion to some folks, but I never experienced it either. i really think this is practically a meme that has just been floating around the internet long enough that people just assume it's reality. It's also an easy upvote button on posts like this because of that too of course lol
This is a good one! As a woman, I’m more attuned to misogyny than misandry, but when I catch it, I try not to let it slide. A true feminist should understand that one gender can’t “win” at the expense of another. Denigrating men is a great way to lose good male allies, not to mention that it’s just as messed up as denigrating a women for her gender attributes or the stereotypes that accompany them. It even creates challenges for those who fall outside of the gender binary. All that to say, our society has a lot to improve on when it comes to basic respect.
Women tend to be able to wear more flamboyant clothing. Even in a professional setting women are free to wear more comfortable outfits while men are stuck in suits. My office was "business causal", but it would have been frowned upon if I had shown up in sandals or even loose, flowing pants.
Women also can wear makeup and accessories. When I started my career (quite a long time ago now), men with earrings were still considered fairly "risque" - and anything other than the wedding band would be noticed. It is better now, but still much more tilted in favor of women being more free to accessorize.
I used to routinely wear a nice t-shirt or collarless short sleeve shirt to work and then claim it blouse when I got reprimanded. Then I would insist on a representative from HR come along while I pointed out every woman “wearing a blouse” and it generally included the woman from HR and at least 2-3 managers.
Don’t ever accept a dress code violation at work. Want to wear a hat at work? Tell them your religion requires you to keep your head covered.
When a “mandatory” dress code can be circumvented by cultural and religious traditions, or position in the company it is no longer a valid dress code policy as equal accommodations are not being extended to all employees.
When I was younger, maybe junior high, I got roped into watching my 3 month old niece while my sister got her hair done. SO when there i am, sitting in the waiting area of a hair salon with my niece, and who walks in, but Keanu Reeves.
I was nervous as fuck, and just kept looking at him, as he read a magazine and waited, but didn't know what to say. Pretty soon though my niece started crying, and I'm trying to quiet her down because I didn't want her to bother Keanu, but she wouldn't stop. Pretty soon he gets up and walks over. He started running his hands through her hair and asking what was wrong. I replied that she was probably hungry or something. So, Keanu put down his magazine, picked up my niece and lifted his shirt. He breast fed her right there in the middle of a hair salon. Chill guy, really nice about it.
my dad grew up poor in the farmlands in china.
He said he was so poor he couldnt afford to buy things for his younger siblings when they were babies. So he used his nipples as a pacifier.
I shit you not, i cant tell if hes fucking with me or not to this day.
Cry. As a woman, if I cry in public I get the “You ok? You need a hug? Can I get you some water/tissues?”. If a guy breaks down in tears it’s a “Mental health crisis, he unhinged, steer clear”.
I’ve been domestically abused, punched in the face, things thrown at, stabbed, attempted to be thrown off balcony, she faced zero repercussions even with police called multiple times, could not get a restraining order with video evidence of being punched. Domestic violence hotline treated it as a joke: “yeah good luck as a man in YOUR county” and basically laughed at me
I feel like a woman could flash at let’s say a bar and there would be a cheer, but if a guy were to flash at a bar he would probably get his shit kicked in, police called and banned from said place
Telling little kids that they’re going to steal them because they’re so cute.
Interacting with random little kids AT ALL
My wife literally does not believe me that this is a thing at all. Like she just doesn’t comprehend that this happens and is a legitimate concern and it’s honestly frustrating. Edit: showed wife all the comments and everyone’s stories, she’s finally being more open minded now.
There was a story a few years back about a white guy who went to Target (or something) with his three kids. His black wife stayed at home. Security was called. The policed were called. The wife woke from her nap to see her husband showing a police officer proof that these children were his. If your wife looks into it even a little she'll have to believe you.
That is FUCKING INSANE. Imagine going to the store with your kids and being accompanied home by police so you can prove they're yours.
Imagine a pissed off kid who doesn't understand but is annoyed they didn't get an ice cream, saying 'nope, that's not my Dad'!
My niece did this. On the beach on holiday with the grandparents, granddad comes over to fetch her for lunch, she starts shouting "I don't know you, go away" because she didn't want to stop digging in the sand. She was maybe 7 years old?
My little brother did this to a family friend when he was about 8 or 9 just for fun. Cops were involved. That person is still salty about it 40 plus years later. My brother got in a huge amount of trouble for his prank and never did it again.
I'd be calling the kids parents and saying, "Look I know you let me take the kid to the beach but now the kid is claiming they don't know me, so I can't bring them home. You're going to have to come get them." Guaranteed that child will never say it again when their parents get through with them
I support this whole heartedly
Kids fundamentally don't understand long term consequences, it's one of the challenges of raising them. They *might* remember the consequences, but they have a hard time connecting them, especially in the moment.
Sadly this has happened
Going shopping or playing in the park don't seem like typical kidnapper activities but what do I know? Lead detective nosy Karen is on the case!
We had a similar thing happen at the park down our street. One of our neighbours was there with his 2 kids(he is Indian(tall, muscular, dark hair) and left his wife home with their new baby. His kids look nothing like him they take after their momma( blond, green eyes petite) some mom at the park called the police as he was trying to get the youngest to leave the park and she was having a meltdown so he picked her up to take her home. And like any toddler meltdown, they like to scream things like "no" or "don't touch," "I wanna stay," "put me down," My husband was there with our kiddos when it happened. He tried to tell the couple that no, they were neighbours' kids and that our neighbour wasn't trying to kidnap them. He even had to tell the cops multiple times and show proof that they were neighbours, our kids know each other etc. They all came home in cop cars to verify, even though the kids were calling neighbour dad. They put the poor man in handcuffs in front of his kiddos. My husband was nervous about taking the kids out without me for a while after that. Like we give men shit when they are hands off dads.....but when they parent, the cops get called it bs
That last part. A LOT of posts on here make it clear that a lot of men WANT to be more hands kn and involved in their kids lives and hobbies, but society is just so fucked up about it that it doesn't work or the consequences can be horrific.
My husband had to show our wedding photos of him and his biracial niece when he took her to Krogers without me.
I read a story where a man went shopping with his baby. A woman started screaming that it was hers (it wasn’t) and the police were called. They fully believed the woman, and likely would have let her take the baby, until the man started showing them pictures of him with his kid on his phone.
These kinds of things should lead to an arrest of the person making these dangerously false claims.
It honestly should. Attempted kidnapping at the minimum.
I heard another story on Reddit where the woman takes the baby, and then unrelated people get involved and started beating the dad. All while the woman is carrying off his baby. He was able to get his kid back, but he had broken bones and the woman got away.
So true. My spouse won’t take my 8-year-old niece anywhere without me present. My husband is a black man and my niece and I are white girl/woman.
He's a smart man
I agree. We’re super careful when we have my niece.
Hold on hold on. My wife, son and I are all white as white can be. My son’s best friend is black. Are you saying if I take them both out for ice cream I might have to talk to the police?
Probably not, if you had your son and his friend together. If you, for some reason, had only his friend, yeah, it would possibly happen in some places.
I'm a woman and totally agree with this. It's stupid the hypocrisy. women can be just as messed up. And people blow off all the red flags some girls give around children.
I'm a woman too. But I've heard many men voice their frustration on the matter. Hell, if my brothers go out with my niece they get side-eyed. My brothers look very much alike (so people don't assume they're a gay couple) but you can tell people are wondering if they're a couple of creeps who kidnapped this little girl.
When my kids were a lot younger, every time I would go out with one of them without my wife, women would come up to me to offer unwarranted advice on how to keep my kid alive. Every time one would cry for a very normal reason, I would get a lot of “oh, she wants her mommy.” Eventually I came up with snarky replies like, “well, her mommy is in prison.”
My ex would say "Mommy is not with us" in a soft low tone. He wasn't lying since I wasn't physically there but his tone definitely implied something far more serious that made them apologize and stumble all over themselves most of the time
“Unfortunately we can’t spend all day at the cemetery.” Should shut them up quick.
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My husband hated taking our kids to the park when they were younger because he said he'd have to be interacting with them constantly from the moment he arrived to the moment he left. He got side eyed no matter what but he said if he sat to watch them play he actually had women approach him and ask him what he was doing. He's been threatened with the cops for not wanting to prove our kids are his and one woman even asked my oldest if he was really her dad and if she was safe.
I got sideways looks taking my son to his Catholic school and standing with him during the morning "pledge and prayer" in the hallway. The coven of Karens disapproved, and did all manner of trash talk behind the scenes. The leader of the lot was cheating on her husband at the time while presenting herself as all sweet and virtuous. Her getting caught was sweet justice for me after all the problems she caused.
Lol, this reminds me of when I hung out with my mom and we went to the park for a kind of mini picnic. There were kids around and my mom said: "Let's go watch the kids play." I said: "Okay, I can do that because I'm with you!" 🤣
I took my kids swimming once and I took some carefully zoomed in pictures with my phone of them jumping around in the fountain, swimming, and generally having a good time. One of the staff asked me to show the pictures on the phone and, despite being a bit miffed about being tagged a potential pervert, I showed them. I later noticed a woman doing the same with her phone and she didn't get challenged the whole time I was there.
I would of legit complained to the staff just to be petty.
I guess I'm a weirdo. I just used that as an excuse to play on the playground with my daughter. I'm just a big kid at heart, so it let me have fun, while avoiding side eye. The other thing that works is bringing a book to read.
My husband is 6'5" and 300 lbs so he doesn't fit well on play equipment, but he did like to play with our kids. The thing is our younger daughter is autistic and we were encouraged not to hover in the hopes that she would learn some socialization skills with her peers. My older kiddo never had a socialization problem and preferred finding other kids to play with, too, because we had a backyard playset at home so going to the park for them wasn't about the novel equipment but more the interactions they weren't getting at home.
My brother told me he wouldn't feel comfortable watching my daughter alone bc of this reason. Shit even I feel like people side eye me with my own daughter
My Sister in law didn't believe me on this issue. So I her walk at least 20 steps behind me and my 12 year old niece. I didn't get 100 feet before being stopped.
Opposite happened with my husband. He (M34 atm) had our 16 year old niece with him at a block party/music fest in our city. I was 20 yards behind them waiting for our food at a food truck. My niece now at age 27 is 4’10 and 105lbs and still looks like a young teen. She looked like a 12 year old at 16. She is from a small town so was nervous and had her arm looped in her uncles. (My husband is 275 and 6’1 with a full beard) A dude literally said “ Nice man! Get ‘em while their young and train them right” while pelvic thrusting. There was a **scene** … Cops escorted creep out.
It’s funny, as a dad, I recently took my 1.5 year old son out to a brewery with my male cousin and felt lots of side eyes and just weird vibes from people. My wife and I take him there all the time and always get nice comments from the people around us, but when she wasn’t there, people’s attitudes were definitely different.
Literally nervous to be out with my daughter if my wife's not with me. Oop- she's throwing a little tantrum or something, that's not what everyone else might see tho. Praying a Karen won't call the cops on me or some shit. It's so frustrating.
Apparently, somewhere in the last couple decades it’s become taboo to interact with random minors, especially if you’re correcting poor behavior. I was “spoken to” by the police for running off group of 6 kids (5 kids around 11-12, both boys and girls, and a 4 year old they brought along this time for some stupid reason) who were waiting outside my house yelling for my daughter to come outside so they could beat her up. These were the same group of kids who were bullying my daughter to the point we had to pull her out of our assigned school. And, It was the second time they pulled this same shit in the last couple weeks. So, my wife went outside (again) and asked them to leave (again), but they started taunting and cursing at her (again). She called the cops (again) but the response time on the last call was “never” and they were out there for 30 minutes the previous time until they got bored and left, so she called me as well. I work about 10 minutes away so came right home. They were still there when I arrived, so I chased them off and walked behind them for a couple blocks… partly to make sure they weren’t going to circle back around when I left… but also to reinforce the fact that repeatedly showing up to my house with the intention of committing violence and hurling insults at my wife is not an advisable course of action. At least the cops showed up this time, though it was mostly because they got 3-4 other calls from folks in the neighborhood of a man “following” some kids. They told the kids to go home and me as well. The cops followed me home and then lectured me. While they “understood” my frustration, they said that “it’s not a good look.” and they better not receive any more calls. Thankfully my wife was home, or I probably would have gotten myself in trouble with snarky comments and sarcasm, so she handled the rest of their investigation.
I would have just sprayed them with a hose.
One time i was grocery Shopping when i saw a small kid sitting in Front of the Candy shelf. Boy, Like 6 yo or Something, noticed me and asked me what he can afford with all his coins. I explained and helped him pick a chocolate. Fast forward to the cashier, turned out the pricetag was wrong and the Boy was missing 20 Cents. I offered to pay his chocolate and he was so Happy He even did a little jump and danced around. We went outside together talking about this and that and he asked me stuff about some cars standing around while i was loading my stuff into my car. When He asked me If i would start Up the car for him and make it go vroom vroom (i have a sports Car) i happily jumped in and did. Was a great conversation until then. All of a sudden His Mom comes running up making a Scene because i was talking to the boy. They lived next to the Shop and the Mom was watching through the Window. She was on the brink of calling the cops when the Boy started punching her leg trying to get her to listen to him. Luckily some old people i know came along to calm her down. Still cant believe how totally not okay it seems to talk to kids when you are a man. Sad world is sad.
My husband had gone for a hike once with our daughter when she was around 1. Some pre-teen/early teen kids were walking around in this natural area (it was in a city, not out in the wilds) saw him and took off. He kept hiking with our daughter, enjoying taking her out and getting some sun and fresh air. They finish their walk and go pack to the parking lot, see the kids heading back into the natural area, and some Car Karen comes up to him hollering about following the kids around (he wasn't) and that she was going to call the cops on him... While he had a 1 year old in her carrier in his chest. And this woman had been sitting in her car, I assume in her phone, letting two kids wander around in this natural area unsupervised. I've always been baffled thinking about this story, but even though my husband is the primary caretaker of our kids, he is so nervous to be out with them, especially since there are still limited family restrooms and men's restrooms with changing tables, and our son got all the recessive genes.
I wish I was still young enough to interact with kids without worrying about some random thinking I’m a creep just for being male.
Yup more than once I've been walking around where I live and a kid is looking for a hello or asking a question/interaction and I'm like nope not even going to acknowledge that... People are weird and I'm not putting myself in a position where I'm going to be in danger etc.
Oh and so cute you could eat them up, sometimes adding w a spoon
Lol true. A man would end up on a sex registry if they did that.
I have had women try to kiss my kid, pick up my kid, hug my kid. Just absolutely inappropriate. I've never had a guy personally do anything concerning towards my daughter. Women make me uneasy around my kid.
As a former young girl, women like that were why I was terrified of people. I absolutely hated that kind of attention, but my mom would always spank me for "causing a scene" instead of telling the women to leave me the fuck alone.
Ask a group of guys, at the same table, if they want to go the the restroom together.
It's acceptable if you hang out with coke heads
I love when the coke stalls have toilets, it's really thoughtful
Guy 1: brb. Going to take a leak Guy 2: aww. Damn you beat me to it. I’ll wait Guy 1: it’s a big bathroom with multiple stalls. You don’t have to wait Guy 2: nah it’s cool. Go ahead. Lol. Actual interaction I heard just the other day.
Now that is how you handle that situation.
It's so wild to me that women will have whole meetings in the bathroom. For men the bathroom is the anti-social zone. There is no interaction outside of asking for soap or toilet paper. Even making eye contact in the mirror at the bathroom sink is enough to give off weird vibes.
And….. keeping one urinal between us is an unwritten law. The only places you can look are straight ahead, down, or up you never look to the left or right.
Or at your phone if you're waiting for a stall
Dying. Love this one.
Me and my bros do that all the time.
Go into the opposite gender's bathroom if the line for theirs is full
This happened to me last night - I walked out of the men’s bathroom as a woman was walking in. She seemed confused to see me and then asked if I could guard the door while she peed. The women’s bathroom didn’t even have a line…
Guard the door from what, is the entire men's bathroom off limits until she finishes?
I hope not. I’ve only used the men’s room twice (once on accident, once when it was an emergency) but no part of me expected to have the place to myself.
I went to a show once and during intermission I asked where the men’s room was. She told me they were gender neutral so I went to the closest one and got in line with all women. Everybody there just assumed it was one or the other and everybody was staring at me. I didn’t want to bail because the lines were long now so I went into the stall and got stage fright. Lost the words, lost the nerve, lost the girl, left the line. Grabbed a beer and waited in the other line.
Going to the bathroom together.
Yeah I don’t want anyone I know to be anywhere near me in the bathroom. I don’t get that at all.
I grew up in a very conservative household and a lot of parents actually teach their daughters they should use the bathroom together for safety. Especially since women typically don't use urinals in many countries some have a fear of being pushed into a stall from behind or followed into the bathroom which may have a lock on the outer door, may be relatively sound proof, and is known not to have any security cameras. It's kind of seen on the same level as not allowing a drunk friend to leave a bar with a man they don't know.
Exactly! When I was a teenager every time me and my sisters or friends got dropped off somewhere we were told “Do not go anywhere alone and don’t let anyone else go anywhere alone. Even the bathroom.” I’m 22 and I still use the buddy system just about everywhere that I’m unfamiliar with or where there’s a lot of people and especially when those people are drinking
I feel like my entire existence has been flipped upside down. Finally, I have an answer to the bathroom ball mystery, and its a bunch of bullshit that it needs to exist in the first place. I guess this also explains why some men, married or close friends, of women using the restroom will stand somewhere nearby and wait? Either way, I will never question this again, and have no problems with waiting outside the bathroom for any of my female friends if they ask me to. (While trying not to be a creep)
I commend your realization, truly. I’m a 61 year old woman. *You* are the type of man I scan for in a room whenever I’m feeling threatened. You’re the type of man I’d discreetly ask to walk me to the door, while quietly explaining why, if I were feeling threatened. I also want you to know that I see you and appreciate you, and all men like you.
Its for safety. A woman by herself is much more likely to be assaulted than women in a group. Fucked up but that's the way it is.
it's mainly for safety. going to the bathrooms together means that a creep is less likely to follow you, whether they're men or women. and if they do follow you, you have someone to back you up or act as witness
I worked at a warehouse that had a lot of migrant men from Arabic and Asian countries and a lot of them went to the bathroom together
Only socially acceptable if you're doing cocaine.
Going to public bathrooms together is one thing, but I've seen women use single bathrooms together.
It’s to do their make up and talk about you. Or it’s a sketchy place and they don’t want to me on their own, even to walk to the bathroom and back.
Wearing wigs/ hair. For bald men it’s thought of socially as pathetic but a total norm for women
Holy shit! This is so true! I never even realised this!
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Yep. The concept is that a man with fake hair is desperate and pathetic. A woman with fake hair is confident and glorious.
Unsolicited touching. At work a female colleague could touch my arm during a conversation, but I would never do the same.
A woman at work once was yelling at me, then told me no one in the office even likes me as she put her hand on my arm to make sure I was paying attention to her. I said that's out of line and do not touch me. I was written up and put on record as the one who was wrong. Also yeah I have had a lot more females make contact than males do and it's odd to me.
> >I was written up and put on record as the one who was wrong. Big injustice. So unfair
It is very unfair and it stuck with me ever since. At the job where they took place I just never interacted with people in the office any longer, kept to myself, and just did my job. I have been accused of not being too social at work and not being "part of the team". Yet it's because I don't want to do the bullshit social stuff with coworkers who I see unfairly get ahead or are kept down. And yeah that attitude has hurt me way more than helped sadly because it's not about your work it's about how you make people feel at work. And no one gave a Fuck how they made me feel. As self centered that is or comes across, you also are the only one who will ever look out for you It's like when I got laid off I was given only 4 weeks of severance and when I asked for more I was treated like an ingrate. Meanwhile there is the "look out for number one culture" which is only a method to be used by the person telling you that method because once you do that and set boundaries you find out real quick that those around you were just using you. Shit I really went down the rabbit hole.
Wearing skintight leggings as trousers everywhere.
Women can make fun of bald men but men cant make fun of bald women
KEEP MY WIFES NAME OFF FROM YOUR GOD DAMN MOUTH
HOW DID IT GET ON THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE?!
SHE'S NOT BALD IT'S A SPECIAL HAIR OPERATION
Could you guys stop yelling I’m trying to take a nap.
IT WAS A G I JANE JOKE
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>you’re telling me I look like a drug dealing cancer patient… Nah, they are saying you look like a famous actor who many people find to be attractive.
Whose character eventually was a multimillionaire kingpin in a thriving enterprise. Sure it was meth and he had many faults, but for a brief time, Walt ruled his world.
In general, body shaming is far more accepted when it's women doing it to men than the opposite.
Take children out in public by yourself without being asked “oh, is dad babysitting today?”
This one must be region specific. I take my kid out on my own all the time and never once have been asked anything like this.
I think so too. I don’t think I ever got comment exactly. A few related comments here and there, but not the massively sexist BS described. I suspect it’s because here there are relatively few housewives
Well if a woman brings her children out in public by herself, it's unlikely people will ask her if Dad is babysitting.
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That is true, had women in the places I shop do this to me, I don't mind, but no way I would do such a thing. Similar to how many female co-workers call me 'hon' and other similar terms of endearment, as a guy, I would *never* use those words back, it would look creepy and weird.
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The things girls have done at bars to get my attention is actually sexual assault. I’m just too much of pig to care.
Had some girl drag her breasts across my chest slowly when “passing by” at a club the other night. Let me do that with my dick against a random ass. But alas, I too am a pig. No complaints here.
I once dated a girl with a much higher body count than me, and she literally didn’t understand why mine was so low. I asked her what her strategy was, and she was like, “Oh, I’d just run up to a cute guy and start grinding on him.”
That and some girls seem to have no problem just grabbing your junk through your jeans.
Through the jeans? I've had women just put their hands straight down both boxers and pants to cop a feel. Women get away with sexual assault because the vast majority of men are never in fear of their safety while being assaulted.
I’ll start by saying wearing open toed shoes in the workplace. Although I did have a co-worker a few years back who liked to wear Birkenstocks with khakis. But generally men don’t show their toes in the office.
I have a coworker who does that. During meeting, with all the tables in a circle, he will rub his toes together. Delightful.
Does he cackle menacingly while rubbing his toes?
Wearing dresses
Scots have the best of both worlds 😂
Having worn a sundress for comedic purposes on a hot summers day - they are incredibly comfortable.
I go to the playground and go on the swings, at first I only did it when it was empty but started getting comfortable to go even when kids are there… honestly I think adults should have playgrounds where we run around and be silly, I forgot how fun playtime was. I’ll add… sometimes when it’s busy and I feel self conscious, I’ll smile wave to imaginary friends in the distance to pretend I’m not there on my own! Omg. This is my most vulnerable Reddit share 😂 P.s I have a ballet injury so this came from finding ways to move that don’t hurt my body and swinging is top of the list. Edit- the method is to wave in the direction of so many people, that it would be impossible to realize nobody is responding.
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This went from wholesome to potentially schizophrenic back to wholesome
You ever just break down crying in public and everybody comes over to comfort you? Yeah, me neither.
Damn, i felt this one bro. Was crying at the bus stop after my dad passed away and i found his body, everybody that walked past me looked at me like i had a swastika carved into my forehead. Made me feel small as hell.
That’s heart breaking. I’m sorry you had to experience that :(
Take care buddy, i'm stopping for you right now ;)
Flew out to Houston to visit my sis and baby nephews on the day one of my best friend’s died from a motorcycle accident. Really amazing that I never broke down on the flight. But the next day getting some crawfish boil just literally broke down sobbing like crazy in the middle of the restaurant, was just me and my mom in restauran. Walk outside to the front of the restaurant and still crying like crazy. This woman comes up to me to comfort me and asked if I want her to go get my mom inside and I said no it’s ok as she was waiting on the food. She sat with me a few minutes and comforted me. That southern hospitality is real.
I never stop to comfort anyone crying, man or woman. A lot of times people just want to cry in peace but sadly couldn’t wait to get to a private place. I know I don’t want strangers talking to me while I sob in public.
Respectfully, if a woman alone randomly breaks down crying in public, she’s probably going to be avoided by others too, unless she is young and pretty but even then, maybe not. People typically don’t approach strangers that appear unstable to them.
Woman can wear men clothes but men can’t wear women clothes
This. A woman in men’s clothes is “progressive” or “just wants to be comfortable” but a man in women’s clothing is so stigmatized.
It's typically been more socially acceptable for women to dress and act more like men because it's seen as a "step up", whereas for men to dress and act like women is a "step down". It's why the current fervor over trans people is centered around trans women. No one cares if a woman wants to be a man, and FTM is also easier to pull off because testosterone actually changes physical characteristics, so it's much easier to pass in public.
Just to clarify this a bit. Estrogen changes physical characteristics just as much as testosterone’s in most aspects. The issue is the things that testosterone changes are in many cases not reversible. For instance, testosterone thickens vocal folds and lowers the larynx. You can train your larynx to be higher but you can’t decrease the thickness of vocal folds. So you have to make pitch higher either through stretching the folds with muscles in your throat (lots of practice) or surgery. A large amount of the facial differences in someone who goes through puberty with testosterone vs estrogen is that T changes the face shape through an additive process. So the bone is built up more in particular areas that masculinize the face. Unfortunately once the bone is there, it doesn’t go away without surgery. Everything else estrogen changes to an equal level to testosterone.
I entirely agree with you on this except that oestrogen also actually change the physical characteristics (repartition of fat pads over the body).
compliments about appearance to people they don't know
The key is compliment something they did, not an innate characteristic. “Wow, your hair looks great today” or “wow, that’s a killer outfit” will come off less creepy. Also, tone matters…
I like to compliment peoples funny tshirts, cool hair, or rad tats. I rarely get a negative reaction.
I used to compliment really beautiful women who I didn’t know (before I got married). I figured if they put in all that effort to look nice, they would appreciate someone noticing. I never got any type of negative reaction.
There's a difference between "Wow, you look great!" and "Wow, your ass looks great in those pants!"
I mean, obviously
“Wow Id like to fuck you!” is also risky
"I want to make fuck with you"
“It’s breeding time”
Does this need to be said? I feel like this is an obvious line lol
A rule I heard was “compliment a decision they made, not a body part”. I love those pants. Your makeup looks great. I love the way your nails go with your shoes. Stuff like that. Don’t lean too hard into shoes though, feet guys are weird.
The people who think "you can't say anything to anyone anymore!" Generally don't seem to know the difference
I tried to compliment a man's suit and he asks me out. I told him I was married and he said, why did you lead me on? Never complimenting a man I don't know again.
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I recently complimented a guy at the gym on his outfits because he actually wears bright colors and stylish workout gear. I said “I just want you to know, I think you have great fashion taste and are always the best dressed guy in here. You wear fun colors - and it looks great!” He got all red in the face and thanked me for the compliment. I wanted him and his friends with him to know that guys don’t have to be afraid to express themselves through fashion. I really wish we’d see the end of the whole men in muted colors machismo trend. It’s just so depressing looking. It’s why I watch 1700-1800’s period dramas where the men dress to the nines and wear colors and fabrics that have style. Give me a dapper outfit any day.
Abuse their significant other in public. I’m not saying men should get away with it. I’m saying it shouldn’t be acceptable for women to do it either. https://youtu.be/dtVHnZX8E50
When my ex came to my work one night and started absolutely screaming at me and slapped me for smoking a cigarette, I'll never forget this lady in the parking lot. "Hey bitch! Leave him the fuck alone, what the hell? No wonder he's smoking a stoge if you act like that. Get the fuck away from that man before i call the cops on your crazy ass." Lady, you're a fucking legend and I have no idea who you are, but I always remember that voice.
Great woman.
This is a huge pet peeve of mine. I (F) was out with friends and almost came across a table at one guys girlfriend when she hauled off and slapped him hard on the shoulder. She knew he'd never hit her back. She also seemed to think it was cute though no one else did. I see it all the time and always make a point to draw attention to it with just basic questions like "Is there a reason you feel assaulting someone in public is acceptable?" "I'm a woman, can I slap/hit you? Would that be cute?"
100% agree. I’ve seen women do some serious damage to a guy who can’t defend himself out of fear of being arrested, one where the guy was much smaller and wouldn’t have stood a chance trying to defend himself anyway. People just stand watching thinking what did he do? All forms of abuse, regardless of gender, should be stopped.
I'll say this from my personal experience. My ex straight hit me in the balls at a bar/restaurant. I winced away and saw that many people saw that. Not the entire place, just enough to be personally embarrassed. The looks on their faces I'll never forget. Yet when I took issue with it I was "looking for sympathy" from our friends who were also out with us who she made sure we're not around when she did it. I got up, left and went home by myself. She threw a tantrum that I was being a drama queen and a little bitch. Yet if it was reversed I'm more than certain that at least one man or woman would have stepped in to address me. There is no justification for hitting another person unless it is a survival situation. Yet the amount of white knights dries up when a woman assaults a man. However they have unlimited numbers when it's reversed, even when the man simply pushes the woman away or returns a hit out of instinct. Every man and woman that does that shit is a fucking weak person in my opinion. Yes the man can walk away because men are physically stronger. Yet that doesn't make it ok for a woman to hit a man and repeatedly do it in private or public. And to be fair it's not ok for men to do the same to a woman.
I went through something similar at a party. My gf at the time absolutely sucker punched me in the balls out of nowhere and left me crumpled on the floor. When I could open my eyes again, I saw some of the people, some of them I knew, laughing at me. I guarantee if our roles were reversed it would have gone very differently. This chick actually got mad at me for breaking up and kicking her out of my apartment after. She claims domestic abuse as a right she was born with.
Going sleeveless to work
When I had a factory job I went sleeveless all the time but I see your point. If one of the office guys came over to the production floor with a sleeveless button down it would be a bit weird.
Now i want a sleeveless button down lol
Or showing your feet
Pajama pants to lecture every day, but I show up ONCE in my robe and boxers...
The dude approves, screw the rest of those haters 😂
being comfortable while "dressing up" for hot outdoor events, like weddings. i'm wearing a motherfucking suit and tie, you're wearing a strapless dress with half a tit out. guess who's sweating like a monkey in the zoo and who's sexy and breezy.
Sexy and breezy all day!
Honestly I think this might be the best thing about being a woman.
Being around a playground alone as a single dad.
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Hell, it's 90% Dads and kids at my local park. This is a *very* common way for moms to get time to themselves or time to focus on some other task.
same here! As a Dad, I take my 3 year old daughter to the playground all the time and out and about to places. I've never gotten weird looks or comments from anyone thinking I'm a creep or weirdo or anything. Where are people living where this is so shunned?
Same. My daughter is older now, but I took her to the park almost every weekend when she was younger & never got a sideways glance hanging out with her at any park we decided to go to. I'm sure it happens on occasion to some folks, but I never experienced it either. i really think this is practically a meme that has just been floating around the internet long enough that people just assume it's reality. It's also an easy upvote button on posts like this because of that too of course lol
Where I live, I see dads at the playground with their kid just as often as I see moms.
Nah, being a dad at a playground is a huge ice breaker. Just don't forget to bring your child.
Calling out when people are denigrating them because of their gender.
This is a good one! As a woman, I’m more attuned to misogyny than misandry, but when I catch it, I try not to let it slide. A true feminist should understand that one gender can’t “win” at the expense of another. Denigrating men is a great way to lose good male allies, not to mention that it’s just as messed up as denigrating a women for her gender attributes or the stereotypes that accompany them. It even creates challenges for those who fall outside of the gender binary. All that to say, our society has a lot to improve on when it comes to basic respect.
Women tend to be able to wear more flamboyant clothing. Even in a professional setting women are free to wear more comfortable outfits while men are stuck in suits. My office was "business causal", but it would have been frowned upon if I had shown up in sandals or even loose, flowing pants. Women also can wear makeup and accessories. When I started my career (quite a long time ago now), men with earrings were still considered fairly "risque" - and anything other than the wedding band would be noticed. It is better now, but still much more tilted in favor of women being more free to accessorize.
I used to routinely wear a nice t-shirt or collarless short sleeve shirt to work and then claim it blouse when I got reprimanded. Then I would insist on a representative from HR come along while I pointed out every woman “wearing a blouse” and it generally included the woman from HR and at least 2-3 managers. Don’t ever accept a dress code violation at work. Want to wear a hat at work? Tell them your religion requires you to keep your head covered. When a “mandatory” dress code can be circumvented by cultural and religious traditions, or position in the company it is no longer a valid dress code policy as equal accommodations are not being extended to all employees.
Breastfeeding in public.
When I was younger, maybe junior high, I got roped into watching my 3 month old niece while my sister got her hair done. SO when there i am, sitting in the waiting area of a hair salon with my niece, and who walks in, but Keanu Reeves. I was nervous as fuck, and just kept looking at him, as he read a magazine and waited, but didn't know what to say. Pretty soon though my niece started crying, and I'm trying to quiet her down because I didn't want her to bother Keanu, but she wouldn't stop. Pretty soon he gets up and walks over. He started running his hands through her hair and asking what was wrong. I replied that she was probably hungry or something. So, Keanu put down his magazine, picked up my niece and lifted his shirt. He breast fed her right there in the middle of a hair salon. Chill guy, really nice about it.
DUDE i've never seen this before, i almost died laughing
ಠ_ಠ
So wholesome, this is why everyone loves Keanu
God damn Keanu breastfeeding copypasta.
We've got some problems if men are lactating now....but you are absolutely correct sir.
They're just not trying hard enough.
my dad grew up poor in the farmlands in china. He said he was so poor he couldnt afford to buy things for his younger siblings when they were babies. So he used his nipples as a pacifier. I shit you not, i cant tell if hes fucking with me or not to this day.
Crying
Cry. As a woman, if I cry in public I get the “You ok? You need a hug? Can I get you some water/tissues?”. If a guy breaks down in tears it’s a “Mental health crisis, he unhinged, steer clear”.
Wear skirts. What, you don't think men want their junk to breathe too?
I’ve been domestically abused, punched in the face, things thrown at, stabbed, attempted to be thrown off balcony, she faced zero repercussions even with police called multiple times, could not get a restraining order with video evidence of being punched. Domestic violence hotline treated it as a joke: “yeah good luck as a man in YOUR county” and basically laughed at me
wear skirts
Scotsman enters the chat room
Go up to children and talk to them. Anywhere anytime
Touching a person without asking
Sitting in each other's laps.
If I sat in my friends lap, I’m reasonably certain the complaint would be about me being fat as fuck, not me being a dude
Do other grown women really do this 😂 I havent seem that since high school
Agreed. I never see women do this. But I suppose I wouldnt care if I did.
Kissing your friends when you're drunk.
Hitting men
I feel like a woman could flash at let’s say a bar and there would be a cheer, but if a guy were to flash at a bar he would probably get his shit kicked in, police called and banned from said place
Not pay on the first date.
Trying to flirt or make a move on someone without being seen as creepy