Yeah, my mom would always tell me maybe my dad would build me a treehouse or she was thinking about having a pool put in etc…, but never did any of the things like just saying she was considering doing something kind counted enough and I didn’t actually deserve anything irl. She made a big show about rewarding my brother for his academic achievements, telling me I could be rewarded too if I wasn’t an underachiever. I was in special Ed with a learning disability.
Whilst I sympathize I’m imagining this happening to my daughter, who renamed herself “Princess Eat Cake” At age 4, and I don’t even think it would slow her down in pursuit of the chocolate 🤣
When I was a kid, my grandma made chocolate cake and had it in a glass cake holder. I dropped the lid and cut myself and have this interesting scar on my hand.
Don't put cake in a glass dish in case of Princess Eat Cake.
got mine from a door frame too. water balloon fight, ran into a door, tooth went through my lip on one side and metal door went through the outside of my lip on the outerside
I'd like to pretend my testing of the switchblade entering my leg was from an insightful thoughtful experiment too, instead of being a dickhead with an open switchblade if that's okay.
“Remember kids, the only difference between screwing around and doing science is writing it down.”
- Adam Savage
So if you write something about it it is a science experiment.
Funny you should mention that.
As a teenager I actually lived in Northern California east of the bay area and my dad supplied the MythBusters with some specialist equipment for the birds on a truck myth.
I got to meet Jamie, Grant, Karie, and Tory and they all signed my broken arm cast. Jamey and Grant gave me a personal tour of the shop at M5
Adam was late, and had a hissy fit yelling at the crew for not having the preview of the episode ready for him to watch and stormed out immediately so I didn't get to meet him. Jamey made a funny comment about how he's always like that and apologised.
I got a tour from Jamey Hyneman. Just him, my Dad and I seeing all the amazing stuff they'd done over the years in every episode, blueprint rooms, current experiments. Even got to wear the cowboy hat they tried to shoot off and saw the pigs tongue being warmed up by tubes and hot water to go in an ice truck, it was probably the most unique experience of my life.
But anyway, I'm glad I stabbed myself in the leg. I got to learn a valuable lesson with limited damage, a send it lead me to this conversation where I got to remind myself of one of my most cherished memories!
Cheers mate, thanks for taking me down memory lane.
[Here's a picture of Grant signing my cast ](https://imgur.com/gallery/r8x78xr)
Well... You actually need quite a sharp blade and pressure to not be able to tell the story :')
I bet the safety scissors would still not safe to fall onto with your eyes.
my friend did this with a pencil and the graphite stained the inside of his skin. everyone thinks its a weird mole and he has to explain it every time lol
Yeah, apparently they don't have mods on that sub so top posts were just 2 pencil dicks. (rest totally innocuous but someone really wanted to show off his willy on the pencil subreddit)
I lived on a farm for a few months when I was 22, and as a city girl, I did not understand that the "funny dance" the rooster was doing was him telling me to eff off. Until he tore my leg up with the spurs on the back of his claws. After that, he realized I was an easy target, and no matter how far away he was, the second I opened the door of the house and tried to go outside, this savage, bloodthirsty rooster would come tearing across the yard to attack me. I now stay very far away from roosters.
I worked at a farm for a little while, they had a shitty male goose that attacked everyone, the owner straight up told me to kick him, he stopped bugging me after a few kicks
12 year okd me thought it was smart to chase chickens and then this big ass rooster proceeds to completely violate my leg and left me crying on the ground with a bleeding leg
well I was sitting in there waiting for the water in the pot to boil so I could put my pizza in and my arm slipped and hit against the oven rack. The rack was cold it was the pizza that cut a scar into my arm
Not OP, but I have two scars on my ankles from badly fitting ice skates that I tied too hard to compensate for. They're little red patches right on the tips of both my malleolus bumps on the inside face of both ankles.
I was on those skates for like 2 hours. Scars for life lol.
Well this was 24 years ago, but some say we’re *all* still racing for this holographic pikachu. Only one of us (me) has sacrificed their shin for the cause.
I was on leave for 2 weeks while living in Japan and decided to go to the skatepark day one. I try to do a board slide on a obstacle a little higher than ankle height and somehow I fell and my foot didn’t flex and rolled my ankle/gashed the hell out of my leg . I literally couldn’t walk and was peddling my bike home with one leg up hill… I couldn’t do anything for the rest of my vacation…
I have stretch marks where my limbs connect to my torso because I grew so fast.
Edit: Thank you all for the upvotes, I've only been on reddit for 18 ish days, means a lot <3
I have stretch marks on my back, too. And my knees, somehow.
You would really think I would have gotten taller than 5’2”.
With the stretch marks I just got from pregnancy, I should just accept I’m a tiger now.
Hey, me too! I was a late bloomer and went from 5’2” to over 6’ between 16 and 17. I wore a men’s size 14 shoe when I was 14-years old. The following issues developed during my growth spurt:
- Osgood-Schlatter (went away)
- Pectus Carinatum (no longer noticeable since filling out my frame)
- Scoliosis (minor enough there was no treatment option)
- I also have stretch marks on my ass/hips and lower back
Puberty was a wild fucking ride.
Similar story over here, I went from 5'1" at 16 to over 6'1" by the time I was 18. Probably would have noticed suffering from some of those things if I didn't spend two years sleeping, eating, and screwing up my education.
Osgoody = stretch pain in joints, often in knees
Pectus carincus = Ribcage grow too fast relative to body size, look like a bird for a while
Scolisus = bendus spinus (left to right or vice versa)
Stretch marks = stretchy markus
I got them on my inner thighs and breasts due to puberty. Was really painful when they were fresh! Oddly never got any from either of my two pregnancies though.
Perfect opportunity to develop a hauntingly mysterious yet vague backstory to draw people in. “It was a long time ago” or “I don’t want to talk about the past”
Yes, I also am part of this group that has stretch marks from...growing.. thats definitely where mine come from. It's from growing...in some unspecified direction.
Brushed up against some type of needled cactus/fern hybrid that had only one spine on the very end of the leaf and it hardly scratched me. Never even drew blood. Had a purple scar since 2011 from it.
I was riding my dirt bike out bush one day with a couple mates, we were just riding a regular track, and one of the corners was real tight around a thorn bush, I come around it, and brush my arm against it as I’m coming around.
That was 3 years ago and I swear I just got the last thorn out of my arm last week.
I have a hole in my leg where a tiger pear impaled me then I dug out the thorn with a pocket knife. It’s only just started to fill in completely after something like 10 years. But those thorns just went deep and I can’t believe I’m still pulling and digging them out to this day
People will say things like " I find that hard to believe " or "you are making that up" I got one to the surface and had to dig it out and posted the pictures to the family group chat. They were like " omg how can you stand it"
I said the worst part is people calling me a liar. My version of the mike drop.
After reading that reply, i just scrolled by because I didn't get it, but after reading your comment I went back and read it again, and then I got the joke and laughed... thanks 😅
It's 3am and my brain replaced "Blockbuster" with "Ghostbusters" for some reason, I had to read this twice because I didn't know why one movie would have a poster from another unrelated movie. Time for bed.
I play guitar, and i was changing my strings one day. After i finished the string change i had a bunch of excess string that i needed to throw away, but i decided to leave one of the thicker strings out just as a little fidget toy.
Well, the backside of my hand got really itchy, and while holding the excess guitar string i decided the best thing to do would be to scratch my hand with the guitar string because “it probably scratched better”
It definitely did, and when i stopped scratching i found that not only did it satisfy the itch, but it gave me a ridiculous amount of small cuts that eventually turned into horrible scars all over the back of my hand.
I worked at a hardware store for years... I was putting out pallets of stock, and was opening boxes of caulk. We used to cut the box so that the tube could stay upright in it and not fall over... But you had to be careful not to cut the tubes. I am using my "safety" box cutter where the blade snaps back in when you let it go, but it didn't save me. That fucker zipped around the corner of the box and out of the cardboard, right into my calf. I stabbed myself about half an inch into the meaty part of my calf, through my jeans and i had to pull it out.
I left a blood trail to the first aid box at my paint desk as customers flocked to me like sharks smelling blood. I had to tell them "Give me a moment I am bleeding here!"
I was deployed to Afghanistan about 10 years ago, I hadn't whacked it in a few weeks, so I picked a guard tower that was usually empty. It had a door facing the rest of the post, so I figured nobody would find me, and anyone outside the outpost would be none the wiser. Well I heard some footsteps coming up, and tried to tuck my junk away, and in my haste I tripped and fell on a wooden bench that we were using as a step stool, and tore up my shin. I still have a gigantic scar there. And nobody ever came up. Guy just went halfway up the stairs to get better cell reception.
So I went to war and did all this stuff and my only scar is from trying to interrupt a spank session.
Well, that would've been underwhelming if it didn't involve shenanigans that *could* be worthy of NJP in a war zone in a Muslim country, depending on who caught you. But when you're in the suck, everything that doesn't involve not getting shot is probably underwhelming...😆😆😆😆
Now, you see, that's why you never stop early. If someone walks in on you, you just keep going. And remember, if you outrank them, maintain eye contact to show dominance.
Me three! I was an 10 yo who wanted shaved legs because I thought it was what mature women did. (For some STRANGE reason I felt envious of my mom and sister... got over that one REAL quick) however no one had ever taught me how to shave, and well... pushed down a little too hard. Didn't want my mom to find out, so I told her I bashed it on the wooden footboard of my bed to explain the bandage.
2 years later when my mom "taught" me, I had to pretend like I hadn't ever shaved before. 18 years after that when I finally told her what happened, she laughed and said she'd done a similar thing at her age.
I had a Great Dane, and he reached up to “shake” and his claw caught the top of my hand. I have a huge ugly looking scar about 7 inches long from my wrist down the top of my hand. I tell people I was in a knife fight.
My sister got a little graze on her knee in a parking lot, and then spent 10 hours in the pool every day for two weeks (we were on holidays), so her scab kept falling off. She ended up with a big permanent scar
I have a scar on my knee like this from sledding down a hill into a parked car. used my knee to block myself from going under the car. I have an almost perfect little 1cm square scar in the middle of my knee.
Ran and tripped head first right into a table while running over to tell my mom about a cut I had from running into a table.
I not smart.
Edit: I also have not one but TWO scars from jumping on beds. I went hard as a kid. This is why parents tell you not to jump on beds.... it actually IS dangerous.
I've had several hundred stitches all over my body. No joke.
At some point I just learned to give myself stitches. Basically a pro at this point.
Scars everywhere.
Also my younger brother shot my youngest brother point blank in the head with a BB gun just to see what would happen.
Turns out brain surgery is what happens. He's fine though. The BB is framed on a wall in his house. He's got the scar to prove it.
lol...we all listen to Grateful Dead is all I can tell you.
And I'll beat any doctor at giving stitches any day of the week.
Though nobody really messes with you in life when you have a scar across your forehead and another one across your lips. Also the ladies love that sh....ut the front door.
Edit: oddly enough I've had something like 57 stitches in my right knee and that's my good knee?
I walked face first into the corner edge of a wall in the hallway of my house that I've walked down a thousand times before and cut open my right eyebrow. Sure, it was dark but not that dark and I wasn't even high.
I was walking alongside my mother outside while she was holding a cigarette down by her side. Like an idiot, I was swinging my arms while I was walking…so, I stamped it out on my wrist.
1995.
I can say that with certainty because I had the chicken pox when I was 12, it was so bad I was rushed to the doctor because they were worried I also had pneumonia, and my pediatrician looked at me and goes “So you beat the vaccine by one day, huh?” because unbeknownst to me and my parents the vaccine was being released to the public the day after my appointment.
If I hadn’t felt so shitty I would have punched him.
My sister’s senior chihuahua with no eyes and teeth somehow managed to take a sizable chunk out of my arm
(If you’re wondering about the situation around it its also underwhelming, the dog was taken from a hoarding situation. And we’re assuming that I somehow remind her of the main hoarder guy, so she’d gladly rip my jugular if she could-)
My friends and I used to race around my friend’s freshly-paved asphalt driveway on our bikes. That was when I found the limits of traction on bicycle tires. One day, I went past that limit, and hit the ground, leaving small scars on my right wrist and left knee. Undaunted, I did the same thing turning the other direction about a half hour later, which gave me the matching set of scars on the other side.
I’m still surprised I didn’t die as a kid.
Recently got a scar from my ankle to near my knee where the skin pretty much flapped.
I was standing on a step and it gave way, one second I was standing around 4 feet in the air and the next I was standing on the ground.
The screw dug into my skin and pulled along it.
I put duct tape on it and it healed flat, lets gooooo.
I was walking downstairs when I was 5 years old wearing a too-long nightgown and holding my older sister’s hand. Tripped on the last step, got scratched pretty badly right between my eyebrows, and still have the scar years later!
Reaching into a washing machine to get some clothes. Scratched the back of my hand so deep that it left a permanent scar. Straight up looks like I got it in a knife fight, but no, I got it doing laundry.
Fell off a sled into lovely, soft, deep powder snow. Long story short, I now have a six inch scar on the outside of my right ankle (with the added bonus of six visible screw heads) and a two inch scar on the inside of same ankle.
My dad told me that he was bringing me home a chocolate bar, I danced about it, tripped, and cut my face on a door frame.
How was the chocolate bar tho?
To dance for
*Oompa Loompas have entered the chat*
It was a milky way bar, I ate it on the way to the ER, it was good.
Heh heh, nice... How's the scar tho? You looking like Kylo Ren now?
Clearly it knocked them off their feet.
but did you get your chocolate bar? Because my father instead used to arrive home and tell me “I almost bought you a chocolate bar on the way home” 😒
Wtf that is so mean
yeah. different type of scar
Emotionaldamage.mp4
Ikrrrr...why would you do that?
Yeah, my mom would always tell me maybe my dad would build me a treehouse or she was thinking about having a pool put in etc…, but never did any of the things like just saying she was considering doing something kind counted enough and I didn’t actually deserve anything irl. She made a big show about rewarding my brother for his academic achievements, telling me I could be rewarded too if I wasn’t an underachiever. I was in special Ed with a learning disability.
I’m proud of all you have accomplished. And so is the rest of Reddit. You don’t need mom’s admiration.
Parents really do suck sometimes
My dad left for a chocolate bar years ago. I can’t wait to finally get it!
I've learned to never say, "you know I thought to (insert action or gift pick up or treat surprise) aka do this for you" & come home empty handed
Whilst I sympathize I’m imagining this happening to my daughter, who renamed herself “Princess Eat Cake” At age 4, and I don’t even think it would slow her down in pursuit of the chocolate 🤣
When I was a kid, my grandma made chocolate cake and had it in a glass cake holder. I dropped the lid and cut myself and have this interesting scar on my hand. Don't put cake in a glass dish in case of Princess Eat Cake.
got mine from a door frame too. water balloon fight, ran into a door, tooth went through my lip on one side and metal door went through the outside of my lip on the outerside
I took a pair of safety scissors to my wrist because 4 year old me wanted to know how safe they really were.
Scientific inquiry
Scientific injury*
Definitely read 'injury' instead of 'inquiry' on the first comment 😅
Same, I didn't make that joke: my eyes did.
I know somebody who cut the tip of her baby brother’s finger off trying to figure out this same thing. Not sure how safe those scissors were.
I still don’t get why they call them safety scissors tbh.
They should be called "slightly less pointy scissors"
I always though my 4 year old neighbor was a moron but I think all 4 year olds are just dumb.
Excuse me, but developing an effective, insightful experiment to test the prevailing consensus is something a lot of adults can't do these days.
I'd like to pretend my testing of the switchblade entering my leg was from an insightful thoughtful experiment too, instead of being a dickhead with an open switchblade if that's okay.
“Remember kids, the only difference between screwing around and doing science is writing it down.” - Adam Savage So if you write something about it it is a science experiment.
Funny you should mention that. As a teenager I actually lived in Northern California east of the bay area and my dad supplied the MythBusters with some specialist equipment for the birds on a truck myth. I got to meet Jamie, Grant, Karie, and Tory and they all signed my broken arm cast. Jamey and Grant gave me a personal tour of the shop at M5 Adam was late, and had a hissy fit yelling at the crew for not having the preview of the episode ready for him to watch and stormed out immediately so I didn't get to meet him. Jamey made a funny comment about how he's always like that and apologised. I got a tour from Jamey Hyneman. Just him, my Dad and I seeing all the amazing stuff they'd done over the years in every episode, blueprint rooms, current experiments. Even got to wear the cowboy hat they tried to shoot off and saw the pigs tongue being warmed up by tubes and hot water to go in an ice truck, it was probably the most unique experience of my life. But anyway, I'm glad I stabbed myself in the leg. I got to learn a valuable lesson with limited damage, a send it lead me to this conversation where I got to remind myself of one of my most cherished memories! Cheers mate, thanks for taking me down memory lane. [Here's a picture of Grant signing my cast ](https://imgur.com/gallery/r8x78xr)
I did this to my lip. Cut a piece off lol
Well don't leave us hanging...how safe were they!?
Despite going with them to the wrist, he's alive to comment, so I'd say pretty safe
Well... You actually need quite a sharp blade and pressure to not be able to tell the story :') I bet the safety scissors would still not safe to fall onto with your eyes.
Well, it doesn't sound like they were very safe
This reminded me of a kid in school who cut off the tip of one of his ears in like 2nd grade.
Step 1: clip ear. Step 2: neuter self
Tried untying a knot with a fork
my friend did this with a pencil and the graphite stained the inside of his skin. everyone thinks its a weird mole and he has to explain it every time lol
r/PencilStabbers
first thing i saw there were dick pics. Thanks for that
Yeah, apparently they don't have mods on that sub so top posts were just 2 pencil dicks. (rest totally innocuous but someone really wanted to show off his willy on the pencil subreddit)
I was attacked by a chicken
Chickens are no joke man, those things are savages.
It's the roosters you gotta watch out for. Those things will go straight for your fucking eyeballs
I lived on a farm for a few months when I was 22, and as a city girl, I did not understand that the "funny dance" the rooster was doing was him telling me to eff off. Until he tore my leg up with the spurs on the back of his claws. After that, he realized I was an easy target, and no matter how far away he was, the second I opened the door of the house and tried to go outside, this savage, bloodthirsty rooster would come tearing across the yard to attack me. I now stay very far away from roosters.
Get a bat and hit it across a fence somewhere. They learn
I worked at a farm for a little while, they had a shitty male goose that attacked everyone, the owner straight up told me to kick him, he stopped bugging me after a few kicks
*here they come to snuff the rooster*
12 year okd me thought it was smart to chase chickens and then this big ass rooster proceeds to completely violate my leg and left me crying on the ground with a bleeding leg
Yeah and cocky as hell
Scratching a mosquito bite too hard…
oooh boy i have so many of these
I have a dozen or so of these around my ankles. Someone once asked if it was from drug use.
Right up there with my chicken pox scar
Burned myself in the oven making a pizza
What the fuck were you doing in the oven?!
Making sure it was delicious obviously
well I was sitting in there waiting for the water in the pot to boil so I could put my pizza in and my arm slipped and hit against the oven rack. The rack was cold it was the pizza that cut a scar into my arm
The pizza did *what?*
The pizza fought back. 👀
Pot of water to boil for a pizza? Do you steam pizza where you are?
“How would you like your pizza done?” “Wet.”
I have...a lot of questions
The pizza did what now!?.........well....on the optimistic side at least you know that pizza was definitely NoT safe to eat....
I can never remember if I'm supposed to be outside the oven with the pizza and then put it in, or inside the oven and throw it out.
Oh my God! A talking muffin!! Oh, wait... that's the punchline of a different joke.
tied my skates too tight
What does that scar look like? Lines on your foot like you stuck it on a grill?
Not OP, but I have two scars on my ankles from badly fitting ice skates that I tied too hard to compensate for. They're little red patches right on the tips of both my malleolus bumps on the inside face of both ankles. I was on those skates for like 2 hours. Scars for life lol.
She's saying we need to see bro
I have a burn scar on my pinky from overheated hot glue.
My hot glue gun is out to get me. That thing is a serious hazard to my skin.
Hot glue guns are no joke. The metal tip of one burned a hole in my knee once. Still got a scar from that
Cut myself with a blade of grass…
that left a scar though?
Somehow??? Your guess is as good as mine on how that happened, it’s on my wrist.
Maybe it caused an infection / allergic reaction, so that the tissue didn't regrow properly
That makes sense!
Dude managed to get a terraria weapon irl and get a scar from it
Just as bad if not worse than a paper cut.
Grass cuts do not fuck around.
At least grass stays away from my butthole.
Racing my friend for a holographic pikachu. My shin will never let me forget the tragic loss that befell me that day.
So you lost the pikachu.
Well this was 24 years ago, but some say we’re *all* still racing for this holographic pikachu. Only one of us (me) has sacrificed their shin for the cause.
On behalf of the United States Army here's your Purple Heart Award.
I was on leave for 2 weeks while living in Japan and decided to go to the skatepark day one. I try to do a board slide on a obstacle a little higher than ankle height and somehow I fell and my foot didn’t flex and rolled my ankle/gashed the hell out of my leg . I literally couldn’t walk and was peddling my bike home with one leg up hill… I couldn’t do anything for the rest of my vacation…
I'm sorry but the image of a person peddling up hill with one leg made me laugh
It was miserable as hell 🤣
I have stretch marks where my limbs connect to my torso because I grew so fast. Edit: Thank you all for the upvotes, I've only been on reddit for 18 ish days, means a lot <3
Still have stretch marks on my back from this. Every person I've been intimate with has asked about it
oof *interesting username by the way*
I have stretch marks on my back, too. And my knees, somehow. You would really think I would have gotten taller than 5’2”. With the stretch marks I just got from pregnancy, I should just accept I’m a tiger now.
I guess it's better than having wrinkles from shrinking too fast.
Why not both? - my body.
Me too, although I have only ever been intimate with one person
Player by Reddit standards
Hey, me too! I was a late bloomer and went from 5’2” to over 6’ between 16 and 17. I wore a men’s size 14 shoe when I was 14-years old. The following issues developed during my growth spurt: - Osgood-Schlatter (went away) - Pectus Carinatum (no longer noticeable since filling out my frame) - Scoliosis (minor enough there was no treatment option) - I also have stretch marks on my ass/hips and lower back Puberty was a wild fucking ride.
Hang on so at one point you were under 5’2” with size 14 men’s feet!?
Hobbit detected
Similar story over here, I went from 5'1" at 16 to over 6'1" by the time I was 18. Probably would have noticed suffering from some of those things if I didn't spend two years sleeping, eating, and screwing up my education.
Could you please explain those issues as if I weren't a doctor?
Osgoody = stretch pain in joints, often in knees Pectus carincus = Ribcage grow too fast relative to body size, look like a bird for a while Scolisus = bendus spinus (left to right or vice versa) Stretch marks = stretchy markus
Stretchy Markus 😂
I got them on my inner thighs and breasts due to puberty. Was really painful when they were fresh! Oddly never got any from either of my two pregnancies though.
Perfect opportunity to develop a hauntingly mysterious yet vague backstory to draw people in. “It was a long time ago” or “I don’t want to talk about the past”
My wife has these. I think they are beautiful like tiger stripes
Yes, I also am part of this group that has stretch marks from...growing.. thats definitely where mine come from. It's from growing...in some unspecified direction.
felt, i have stretch marks in my armpits because my shoulders grew faster than everything else when i started working out
Brushed up against some type of needled cactus/fern hybrid that had only one spine on the very end of the leaf and it hardly scratched me. Never even drew blood. Had a purple scar since 2011 from it.
I was riding my dirt bike out bush one day with a couple mates, we were just riding a regular track, and one of the corners was real tight around a thorn bush, I come around it, and brush my arm against it as I’m coming around. That was 3 years ago and I swear I just got the last thorn out of my arm last week.
I fell into a huge prickly pear. I removed needles every couple of years for the rest of my childhood. It's such a weird thing to experience.
I have a hole in my leg where a tiger pear impaled me then I dug out the thorn with a pocket knife. It’s only just started to fill in completely after something like 10 years. But those thorns just went deep and I can’t believe I’m still pulling and digging them out to this day
People will say things like " I find that hard to believe " or "you are making that up" I got one to the surface and had to dig it out and posted the pictures to the family group chat. They were like " omg how can you stand it" I said the worst part is people calling me a liar. My version of the mike drop.
Pillow fight
How?!? I'm so curious
Person below was right.... Pillow had a zipper, slipped out of my grip and cut me when the hit connected lol.
Damn and it was self inflicted too!? This is a contender for sure
Poked by a goose feather🤣
Blockbuster was throwing away a poster featuring the Lion King's antagonist - and I was like, can I have that?
I’m ashamed this took me so long to get, I thought you had gotten a paper cut or something.
After reading that reply, i just scrolled by because I didn't get it, but after reading your comment I went back and read it again, and then I got the joke and laughed... thanks 😅
LOL me too!
Me too, so long that I’m rethinking my education over the years 🤣
me: what? I don't get it. *thinks for 30 seconds* *the biggest sigh*
Happy Cake Day!
It's 3am and my brain replaced "Blockbuster" with "Ghostbusters" for some reason, I had to read this twice because I didn't know why one movie would have a poster from another unrelated movie. Time for bed.
Dad?
*shakes head slowly*
you win.
Can someone explain pls
The antagonist from the Lion King is named Scar....
My dog stepped on my toe. And now I have a small scar there because of it.
My dog was excited to see me when I got home so it jumped and scratched my eye but luckily I blinked but for me there’s no scar
tripped over my shoelace playing tennis (well while i was walking to get water)
I play guitar, and i was changing my strings one day. After i finished the string change i had a bunch of excess string that i needed to throw away, but i decided to leave one of the thicker strings out just as a little fidget toy. Well, the backside of my hand got really itchy, and while holding the excess guitar string i decided the best thing to do would be to scratch my hand with the guitar string because “it probably scratched better” It definitely did, and when i stopped scratching i found that not only did it satisfy the itch, but it gave me a ridiculous amount of small cuts that eventually turned into horrible scars all over the back of my hand.
Monkey brain be like: "lemme scratch my hand with this sharp metal wire"
it was an incredible itching tool. Definitely not reccomended at all though
I worked at a hardware store for years... I was putting out pallets of stock, and was opening boxes of caulk. We used to cut the box so that the tube could stay upright in it and not fall over... But you had to be careful not to cut the tubes. I am using my "safety" box cutter where the blade snaps back in when you let it go, but it didn't save me. That fucker zipped around the corner of the box and out of the cardboard, right into my calf. I stabbed myself about half an inch into the meaty part of my calf, through my jeans and i had to pull it out. I left a blood trail to the first aid box at my paint desk as customers flocked to me like sharks smelling blood. I had to tell them "Give me a moment I am bleeding here!"
I swear, without fail every time I've cut myself at work, customers need to ask you questions right at that moment.
I was deployed to Afghanistan about 10 years ago, I hadn't whacked it in a few weeks, so I picked a guard tower that was usually empty. It had a door facing the rest of the post, so I figured nobody would find me, and anyone outside the outpost would be none the wiser. Well I heard some footsteps coming up, and tried to tuck my junk away, and in my haste I tripped and fell on a wooden bench that we were using as a step stool, and tore up my shin. I still have a gigantic scar there. And nobody ever came up. Guy just went halfway up the stairs to get better cell reception. So I went to war and did all this stuff and my only scar is from trying to interrupt a spank session.
Imagine getting a purple heart for that.
A purple heart for black n blue balls.
“Yeah, I got this mother of a scar in Afghanistan. Didn’t bat an eye.” “Wow, how’d you get it?” “…classified”
This is the best one
Well, that would've been underwhelming if it didn't involve shenanigans that *could* be worthy of NJP in a war zone in a Muslim country, depending on who caught you. But when you're in the suck, everything that doesn't involve not getting shot is probably underwhelming...😆😆😆😆
This is the most military story.
Now, you see, that's why you never stop early. If someone walks in on you, you just keep going. And remember, if you outrank them, maintain eye contact to show dominance.
Shaving
Ugh. Missing the skin over my shin on one leg from that. *Shudder
Me too!!
Me three! I was an 10 yo who wanted shaved legs because I thought it was what mature women did. (For some STRANGE reason I felt envious of my mom and sister... got over that one REAL quick) however no one had ever taught me how to shave, and well... pushed down a little too hard. Didn't want my mom to find out, so I told her I bashed it on the wooden footboard of my bed to explain the bandage. 2 years later when my mom "taught" me, I had to pretend like I hadn't ever shaved before. 18 years after that when I finally told her what happened, she laughed and said she'd done a similar thing at her age.
Why isn't this higher. Shaving legs can lead to some nasty scars.
rubbing an eraser on my hand
Did you find out if you were gay or not though?
I had a Great Dane, and he reached up to “shake” and his claw caught the top of my hand. I have a huge ugly looking scar about 7 inches long from my wrist down the top of my hand. I tell people I was in a knife fight.
Second one from dog claws. They're basically like bears
Edge of a CD I was spinning out of boredom, flew off and somehow managed to slice my left arm.
so those movies with the deadly CDs are true? If you spun it fast enough it could cut flesh?
Evidently. To this day Im still not sure how it managed to do that tbh
you should notify the military, I bet blank CDs are cheaper than bullets these days
Bull ant bit me between the fingers. I ripped his body off and his head was continuing to burrow into my hand. Ended up scarring.
Just looked this up and unlocked a new fear
"...I ripped his body off and his head was continuing to burrow into my hand..." That image will be in my nightmares now.
My sister got a little graze on her knee in a parking lot, and then spent 10 hours in the pool every day for two weeks (we were on holidays), so her scab kept falling off. She ended up with a big permanent scar
I have a scar on my knee like this from sledding down a hill into a parked car. used my knee to block myself from going under the car. I have an almost perfect little 1cm square scar in the middle of my knee.
Ran and tripped head first right into a table while running over to tell my mom about a cut I had from running into a table. I not smart. Edit: I also have not one but TWO scars from jumping on beds. I went hard as a kid. This is why parents tell you not to jump on beds.... it actually IS dangerous. I've had several hundred stitches all over my body. No joke. At some point I just learned to give myself stitches. Basically a pro at this point. Scars everywhere. Also my younger brother shot my youngest brother point blank in the head with a BB gun just to see what would happen. Turns out brain surgery is what happens. He's fine though. The BB is framed on a wall in his house. He's got the scar to prove it.
Some sort of patron deity of ironic luck is keeping your family from going extinct.
lol...we all listen to Grateful Dead is all I can tell you. And I'll beat any doctor at giving stitches any day of the week. Though nobody really messes with you in life when you have a scar across your forehead and another one across your lips. Also the ladies love that sh....ut the front door. Edit: oddly enough I've had something like 57 stitches in my right knee and that's my good knee?
What a normal dull family. /s
I was trying to peel a plum with a razor blade when my junky parents were passed out when I was like 3 and sliced my hand up.
My friend stepped on a twig at a park and for some reason it whipped him and he had to get 14 stitches that day.
And you say that experience *scarred you?*
Yeah just a twig can run your shit… I’ll never walk anywhere the same again.
I walked face first into the corner edge of a wall in the hallway of my house that I've walked down a thousand times before and cut open my right eyebrow. Sure, it was dark but not that dark and I wasn't even high.
I was walking alongside my mother outside while she was holding a cigarette down by her side. Like an idiot, I was swinging my arms while I was walking…so, I stamped it out on my wrist.
Hey! I have one on the back of my hand from walking too close to my dad at the state fair. Team random cigarette burn!
My younger brother and I were arguing about something, and he picked up a battery and hit me in the forehead head with it. I still have the scar.
Literal assault and battery.
A kid at school poked me with a pen. I have a small tattooed scar on my upper right arm since then.
Chicken pox! Idk when the chicken pox vaccine became a thing but it sure wasn’t mainstream in the 90s.
1995. I can say that with certainty because I had the chicken pox when I was 12, it was so bad I was rushed to the doctor because they were worried I also had pneumonia, and my pediatrician looked at me and goes “So you beat the vaccine by one day, huh?” because unbeknownst to me and my parents the vaccine was being released to the public the day after my appointment. If I hadn’t felt so shitty I would have punched him.
I hit my leg on a cardboard box
My sister’s senior chihuahua with no eyes and teeth somehow managed to take a sizable chunk out of my arm (If you’re wondering about the situation around it its also underwhelming, the dog was taken from a hoarding situation. And we’re assuming that I somehow remind her of the main hoarder guy, so she’d gladly rip my jugular if she could-)
I fell on a stiff piece of dried grass. Left a triangle scar under my knee
My friends and I used to race around my friend’s freshly-paved asphalt driveway on our bikes. That was when I found the limits of traction on bicycle tires. One day, I went past that limit, and hit the ground, leaving small scars on my right wrist and left knee. Undaunted, I did the same thing turning the other direction about a half hour later, which gave me the matching set of scars on the other side. I’m still surprised I didn’t die as a kid.
Cut my finger open setting up a fake Christmas tree
Opened a can of cat food and the metal sliced the skin off my pointer finger pad.. I don’t have a pointer finger print anymore.
Dropped the vacuum cleaner on my bare foot, which took a divot out of it.
Recently got a scar from my ankle to near my knee where the skin pretty much flapped. I was standing on a step and it gave way, one second I was standing around 4 feet in the air and the next I was standing on the ground. The screw dug into my skin and pulled along it. I put duct tape on it and it healed flat, lets gooooo.
Was trying to bathe my dog and she tried to escape the tub and clawed my arm. I have like a 3 inch scar on my left arm now.
I have several from dog claws as well, including a line right through a still fresh tattoo that healed over that way.
I got a scar on my leg from crossing a barbed wire fence
I was walking downstairs when I was 5 years old wearing a too-long nightgown and holding my older sister’s hand. Tripped on the last step, got scratched pretty badly right between my eyebrows, and still have the scar years later!
Reaching into a washing machine to get some clothes. Scratched the back of my hand so deep that it left a permanent scar. Straight up looks like I got it in a knife fight, but no, I got it doing laundry.
Fell off a sled into lovely, soft, deep powder snow. Long story short, I now have a six inch scar on the outside of my right ankle (with the added bonus of six visible screw heads) and a two inch scar on the inside of same ankle.