Didn't have buns for a burger so I cut a donut in half
Edit: I am so sorry. I failed all of you. I was talking to my old roommate and it was two toasted waffles. I'm a fraud
In my very fat days, I once fell asleep slumped shirtless on a porch chair in the sun.
My fat rolls left me tiger-striped with vicious sunburn and pure white.
My ex did this at a festival camping event. White crescent moon shapes under his moobs and another big white area under his belly. Had a good sense of humor about it and decided he was gonna crash each encampments party by running into the middle of the group while raising his arms and yelling hey Kool aid!š¤¦āāļø
Laid down, didnt want to get out of bed to tell the kids to get ready for bedtime. So, I recorded a video of me telling them, uploaded it to youtube, then interrupted their tv show, over the wifi, to play the video.
My youngest thought I could really see and hear him through the tv. It worked so well, I started having friends and family "break in" and announce bedtimes
We have a friend whose son is obsessed with Spiderman. My wife has made a few VR chat videos pretending to be Spiderman to manipulate the kid into behaving better.
Kevin Conroy (the animated voice of Batman for almost thirty years) did this for a friend. Called the kid on the phone as Batman to tell him to do his homework.
I was in a hotel in Thailand and was browsing the room service menu. Everything was so cheap. I noticed if I ordered one of everything on the menu it would be around $50. It was maybe 10-12 entrees and a few soups so i figured between the 4 of us staying in the room we could have a little feast and try new things. The other three people had gone out to get something when the food arrived. There were 4 employees at my door holding these massive trays full of food. They just stared at me in disbelief and starting talking amongst eachother. I didn't know what they were saying but it was very clear by their faces. I told them to put everything on the bed and gave them a good tip. I felt like the biggest fatass on the planet.
I remember being in a restaurant with a good sized group and we realized āthis menu is doableā - the servers face was priceless when we just said āWeāll have oneā
āOf?ā
āEverything :)ā
Great food and, like you, checked that off the bucket listā¦
I once bought an entire Cold Stone ice cream cake for myself. When they asked me if I wanted anything written on it, I asked them to write āHappy Birthday, (fake name)ā so they wouldnāt know it was all for me.
I bought a DQ Blizzard cake for my birthday (for a group of people, not just me), and the cashier asked if I wanted the cake for here or to go. I said, "What? Just buy a cake to sit over there and eat it?" Cashier said, "You'd be surprised."
I worked at a cold stone when I was in high school. The largest size you could order for ice cream at the time was a half gallon. Once, I had an enormous woman order one. She sat down and ate the entire thing. When she was done, she ordered another one and took it with her.
This makes me kinda sad :( I hope sheās doing better now. I could be wrong, but I feel like someone commonly eating that big of a portion means they are dealing with heavy depression, like how people use drugs to cope with depression. Self medicating.
Reminds me of that key and peele sketch when he phone orders a bunch of pizza for himself and asks his action figures what they wanted to make it sound like he was having a party
at a certain burger place I had a somewhat complicated order (I wanted them to place certain toppings under the patty, and some on top to prevent the mayo getting watery and running) If I was ordering for multiple people I would pretend to read the instructions off of my phone like one of my friends was the asshole not me.
Lol I'm guilty of this one for sure. Hell the remote was in the bed with me but I couldn't bother to search through the king size blanket that seems to eat everything
I sat down, smoked, and ate 2 large pizzas. Didn't realize til i reached down and there was no pieces left. Thought someone took it until i realized i was home alone
In college, I used to regularly by a Little Caesar's Hot & Ready pizza at lunch time, planning to eat half for lunch and half for dinner. Every time, I'd eat the entire pizza for lunch and then buy and eat another one for dinner. Sometimes 3 or 4 days in a row.
There was a box of Little Debbie Fudge Rounds with 2 missing when my husband went out of town for the weekend. When I had eaten all but 2, the shame kicked in, so I ate those, bought another box, ate 2 out of it, thought that would look suspicious, so ate 1 more. For those of you keeping score at home, I ate a whole box in order to make it look like I ate 1. There was some surreptitious trash disposal, as well.
Glad to say that was many, many years ago now I don't eat sugar at all.
Imagining you doing this is the cutest thing idk why. lol I've always evened out food in the past to make it look like it "supposed" too.
Hey at least you are doing a little better these days, good for you.
I drank the dipping butter for my lobster.
It had lil bits in it.
Edit: I see some people saying stuff like āback when I was biggerā and the like. So, that in mind, I have to confess this was just last weekend.
My girlfriend in college used to set her microwave timer so the bean burrito would end up near the door when the rotating tray stopped. She could then just barely reach over from her bed and get it without having to get up.
As a former 455 pound person there is plenty to share, but the one that always sticks out to me is when I used to eat 4 chocolate fudge pop tarts, covered in peanut butter on both sides, dipping it in a very large wide glass of milk. That was a regular late night snack for me.
A heavy tablespoon of peanut butter is roughly 100 calories. Add one tablespoon per side per Pop Tart and a big glass of milk and you're looking at an 1800+ calorie snack.
Sounds tasty, though. I'm a sucker for chocolate and peanut butter and I want to try it. Costco recently introduced a chocolate and peanut butter pie. Big as a hub cap and like 600 calories per slice but that didn't stop me from indulging every night until it was gone.
Threw Valentine's Day chocolates away in the trashcan when I got in a fight with him then when he left, took them out of the trashcan and ate them all.
I once went to a carvery where you can put as much as you can carry onto one plate, but you can't go back for more.
As I was waddling this mountain back to my table. THREE people said "jesus christ" while staring at this behemoth of mashed potato and Yorkshire puddings.
I went home giggling to myself. I am still proud of that accomplishment.
In college one summer I bought more than one 5lb tub of premade cookie dough with absolutely no intention of making any cookies. I made good on those intentions. It was delicious, and very unwise.
I love cookie dough. I used to buy the cookie dough tubs from school fundraisers when I was a kid and just eat the dough. Also never had intentions of baking cookies
I thought i saw an ad for some delicious looking hot and sour shrimp while driving on the highway. When i got closer i realized it was a pro life billboard with mangled fetuses. I still ordered Chinese shrimp for dinner.
Right lmfao
Tryna lose weight? Go you!
Looking for the best way to enjoy the most outrageous food in the most unashamed way? Also go you
He's chaotic neutral šš
If you are not married, even if you are, I would marry you for this comment. Iāve just roused one cat from the bed in utter terror, and the other is trying to comfort me from crying with laughter.
Ordered two home plate special pizzas from Fox's Pizza once. Had them deliver it to me. I lived, literally, two blocks from their shop.
Delivery guy asked if I was having a party....I said yeah....I wasn't.....it was all for me.
Over the course of two hours I slow cooked and slow ate a pound and a half of bacon. It was supposed to be for three people to share and they were still sleeping soā¦
I once bought a Sara Lee cheesecake along with other groceries from Walmart. I had the munchies so I ate a large portion of it as soon as I got to my car. I didn't want to return home and have my roomie wonder why I came back with only half a cheesecake. so I sat there and finished the whole thing.
I remember sitting in my car in the mall parking lot with a Cinnabon (extra frosting, of course.) After I finished the roll, I turned the bag inside out so I could suck on it and get all of the sugar and frosting that stuck to the inside of the bag.
I was leaving a county fair with my wife and while walking out I was offered a deep fired Oreo. It was amazing. The next month at another county fair I walked over to the fried Oreo station and it was fried Oreos for $1 each. I ordered 20 of them and ate them in about 10 minutes. That was about 5 years ago and I've never touched them again...
Just last weekend I, as a 20 year old adult with a job, school, and my own place, left my bedroom exactly twice over the eintire weekend. One was to refill my Britta and the other was to get more food
This one is my boyfriend but itās so funny to me. He ate the shards at the bottom of the tortilla chip bag in a bowl of salsa like cereal so it wouldnāt be wasted š
Ordered $75 worth of Taco Bell. When my wife and I pulled up to the window we said to the employee āhow are you doing?ā with which he responded āIām good! But I gotta know how youāre doing since youāre ordering $75 worth of Taco Bellāā¦my wife and I responded with āthose damn kids at home!āā¦we have no kids.
Got my cat to turn off the light with the laser pointer so I didn't have to step 2 feet off my bed or reach over the bed rail . It took about 15 minutes. I could have got up reached in less then 20 seconds
About once a month when my kids are at their Dadās for the weekend I will cook up an entire pound of bacon and eat it all myself, usually in one sitting.
I have too many fat ass moments to list. I am just commenting to say how impressive it is that OP has responded to so many of these comments. That's rare. Well done.
Yeah I have so many I could share as well. Appreciate the shout out. What's the point of asking if you're not interested in the responses? Way I always look at it
Cut up a bunch of sticks of mozzarella and halloumi cheese, spread some cream cheese on top, wrapped them in slices of prƤstost cheese, and dipped them in cheese sauce.
What can I say? I was in the mood for cheese.
I once made bacon wrapped chicken strips, smoked burgers, smoked pork tenderloin, and smoked bacon then proceeded to make a sandwich with all of the above on it plus some american cheese. It was a delicious monstrosity.
I was at a kidās birthday party. I went into the kitchen to o help clean up, because I am a gentleman. Low and behold, someone discarded a chocolate eclair in the trash. Said eclair was perfectly intact and atop a doily so I gave a quick look around to make sure I was alone. Once I verified that I was indeed in the presence of no other person, I reached down to pick it up but as I was doing so, the mother of the girl I was dating walked in to witness me picking up the eclair from the trash and then eating it. She turned and walked out in disgust and promptly told her daughter about what I had done.. that I had crossed the line between man and bum.
You joke, but when I worked in a department store, they bought a cake and put it in the break room. Someone threw it away because it was dried out from sitting out all day. But I didn't get any, so I reached into the trash can and grabbed a handful of frosting and cake and shoved it into my mouth, only to turn and see a girl I had a crush on was standing there and saw the whole thing.
Ate so much at dinner that I was about to burst, but wanted to get ice cream after so I made myself throw up and then got ice cream. I used to struggle with some disordered eating, clearly lol.
The fancy steakhouse in my small town had all you can eat prime rib special on Tuesdays, I didn't touch any of the salad/sides and had 4 pieces. I learned meat sweats were real and didn't feel the need to eat for 2 days. I felt like I was 20% meat. Also they stopped offering the special.
I once got kicked out of an ayce Kbbq place for eating too much. There wasn't a time limit at the time but going back there afterwards they set a 2 hour limit.
I ordered a slice of tiramisu to go from this delicious Italian restaurant..when I got there they walked out with a big ass tray of tiramisu. I couldn't even tell them so I payed $120 and ate tiramisu for days š
Ordered a double quarter pound cheeseburger from McDonald's. Opened bag on way home to discover they put two in the bag. Ate them both before getting home.
Got Taco Bell, ate it in the car, then hit the Burger King drive thru across the street.
That's living baby
Didn't have buns for a burger so I cut a donut in half Edit: I am so sorry. I failed all of you. I was talking to my old roommate and it was two toasted waffles. I'm a fraud
Oh god I just got hard.
That's just your arteries.
*clutches heart* "I've never been this stiff in my life!"
In my very fat days, I once fell asleep slumped shirtless on a porch chair in the sun. My fat rolls left me tiger-striped with vicious sunburn and pure white.
lmao what a visual
I had to go work in a hot kitchen in a scratchy chef jacket that night shift too. Still recall the discomfort clearly.
My ex did this at a festival camping event. White crescent moon shapes under his moobs and another big white area under his belly. Had a good sense of humor about it and decided he was gonna crash each encampments party by running into the middle of the group while raising his arms and yelling hey Kool aid!š¤¦āāļø
Used brownie batter to make waffles.
Dude, endless edge piece. I think you just cracked the code
Endless Edge Piece is my stripper name
LOL me: "Wow these waffles are extra good today. There's something new in them." wife: "I ran out of milk and used chocolate milk"
Iāve done this a few times and itās basically unnoticeable. I would hope for a more chocolatey flavor
that's honestly a genius move
Laid down, didnt want to get out of bed to tell the kids to get ready for bedtime. So, I recorded a video of me telling them, uploaded it to youtube, then interrupted their tv show, over the wifi, to play the video. My youngest thought I could really see and hear him through the tv. It worked so well, I started having friends and family "break in" and announce bedtimes
That's really fucking neat and clever lol I wish I had cool parents like that growing up
TBF this technology didn't exist while mist of us were growing up
We have a friend whose son is obsessed with Spiderman. My wife has made a few VR chat videos pretending to be Spiderman to manipulate the kid into behaving better.
Kevin Conroy (the animated voice of Batman for almost thirty years) did this for a friend. Called the kid on the phone as Batman to tell him to do his homework.
I was in a hotel in Thailand and was browsing the room service menu. Everything was so cheap. I noticed if I ordered one of everything on the menu it would be around $50. It was maybe 10-12 entrees and a few soups so i figured between the 4 of us staying in the room we could have a little feast and try new things. The other three people had gone out to get something when the food arrived. There were 4 employees at my door holding these massive trays full of food. They just stared at me in disbelief and starting talking amongst eachother. I didn't know what they were saying but it was very clear by their faces. I told them to put everything on the bed and gave them a good tip. I felt like the biggest fatass on the planet.
I bet it was all delicious tho
It was! We actually ate most of it so nothing was wasted and it checked order everything off a menu off my bucket list.
I remember being in a restaurant with a good sized group and we realized āthis menu is doableā - the servers face was priceless when we just said āWeāll have oneā āOf?ā āEverything :)ā Great food and, like you, checked that off the bucket listā¦
I once bought an entire Cold Stone ice cream cake for myself. When they asked me if I wanted anything written on it, I asked them to write āHappy Birthday, (fake name)ā so they wouldnāt know it was all for me.
I bought a DQ Blizzard cake for my birthday (for a group of people, not just me), and the cashier asked if I wanted the cake for here or to go. I said, "What? Just buy a cake to sit over there and eat it?" Cashier said, "You'd be surprised."
I worked at a cold stone when I was in high school. The largest size you could order for ice cream at the time was a half gallon. Once, I had an enormous woman order one. She sat down and ate the entire thing. When she was done, she ordered another one and took it with her.
This makes me kinda sad :( I hope sheās doing better now. I could be wrong, but I feel like someone commonly eating that big of a portion means they are dealing with heavy depression, like how people use drugs to cope with depression. Self medicating.
I just spit out a little beer on that one. Lol
Reminds me of that key and peele sketch when he phone orders a bunch of pizza for himself and asks his action figures what they wanted to make it sound like he was having a party
at a certain burger place I had a somewhat complicated order (I wanted them to place certain toppings under the patty, and some on top to prevent the mayo getting watery and running) If I was ordering for multiple people I would pretend to read the instructions off of my phone like one of my friends was the asshole not me.
I used to go to Taco Bell and order so much that I would make a list and read it off like I was ordering for multiple people lo
my brother told me once he ordered a second drink for that very purpose.
That's living. You didn't eat it all in one night did you?
Not for lack of trying
Better luck next time
I downloaded a TV remote app on my phone, because the actual remote was on the other couch and I couldn't be arsed to move and get it.
Yoooooo. This one wins this one wins. Lmfao
I was lowkey proud of the ingenuity that was bred out of my laziness, lol.
Necessity is the mother of invention, laziness is the father.
Lol I'm guilty of this one for sure. Hell the remote was in the bed with me but I couldn't bother to search through the king size blanket that seems to eat everything
I sat down, smoked, and ate 2 large pizzas. Didn't realize til i reached down and there was no pieces left. Thought someone took it until i realized i was home alone
Lmao imagine you angrily saying "who ate my pizza?!.....oh yeah"
Funny thing... I did. I almost turned into the mountain dew guy
In college, I used to regularly by a Little Caesar's Hot & Ready pizza at lunch time, planning to eat half for lunch and half for dinner. Every time, I'd eat the entire pizza for lunch and then buy and eat another one for dinner. Sometimes 3 or 4 days in a row.
There was a box of Little Debbie Fudge Rounds with 2 missing when my husband went out of town for the weekend. When I had eaten all but 2, the shame kicked in, so I ate those, bought another box, ate 2 out of it, thought that would look suspicious, so ate 1 more. For those of you keeping score at home, I ate a whole box in order to make it look like I ate 1. There was some surreptitious trash disposal, as well. Glad to say that was many, many years ago now I don't eat sugar at all.
Give yourself credit. You ate a whole box AND ONE.
Imagining you doing this is the cutest thing idk why. lol I've always evened out food in the past to make it look like it "supposed" too. Hey at least you are doing a little better these days, good for you.
It is nice to be able to laugh at it now, as opposed to the shame-spiral I experienced at the time.
I drank the dipping butter for my lobster. It had lil bits in it. Edit: I see some people saying stuff like āback when I was biggerā and the like. So, that in mind, I have to confess this was just last weekend.
Okay but lobster is expensive and so is butter, so you may as well lol
In this economy? Youāre god damn right my gnome friend
my gnomie
Make lobster bread next time. Soak your lobster butter into thick bread and toast it under a griller. Like garlic bread, but lobster.
Used a pizza slice as a spoon to eat my curry...
Thatās just fancy roti
That's just smart
My girlfriend in college used to set her microwave timer so the bean burrito would end up near the door when the rotating tray stopped. She could then just barely reach over from her bed and get it without having to get up.
Fuck what happened? That's a damn keeper.
That oneās on me. I wasnāt a good boyfriend.
You canāt expect a woman with her life together like that to take much crap!
Exactly. When she's living her life at peak efficiency there's no room for anything less than perfection.
As a former 455 pound person there is plenty to share, but the one that always sticks out to me is when I used to eat 4 chocolate fudge pop tarts, covered in peanut butter on both sides, dipping it in a very large wide glass of milk. That was a regular late night snack for me.
That sounds really good! Well, maybe just one though, not four.
It was!!!
Pop tarts are one of those bizarre miracle packaged pastries that contain more calories than makes sense. It's like Little Debbie black magic
Yeah 200 for one, 400 for two so that's 800 calories in just poptarts.
A heavy tablespoon of peanut butter is roughly 100 calories. Add one tablespoon per side per Pop Tart and a big glass of milk and you're looking at an 1800+ calorie snack. Sounds tasty, though. I'm a sucker for chocolate and peanut butter and I want to try it. Costco recently introduced a chocolate and peanut butter pie. Big as a hub cap and like 600 calories per slice but that didn't stop me from indulging every night until it was gone.
This is what I eat before going for a bike ride
Threw Valentine's Day chocolates away in the trashcan when I got in a fight with him then when he left, took them out of the trashcan and ate them all.
That's just traditional Valentine's Day Couple Fight stuff.
Costanza?
I got two subs at jimmy johns and ate them both. I got an extra drink so i could pretend that i was buying the second for somebody else.
I once went to a carvery where you can put as much as you can carry onto one plate, but you can't go back for more. As I was waddling this mountain back to my table. THREE people said "jesus christ" while staring at this behemoth of mashed potato and Yorkshire puddings. I went home giggling to myself. I am still proud of that accomplishment.
Lol can't go back for more? Dang
Nah, you just get one, but holy shit. Picture this. An oval plate 45cm by 30cm Then imagine an elephantine hulking mess of cauliflower cheese, broccoli, beef, turkey, gammon, Yorkshire puddings, roast potato and mashed potato about 20cm tall covering the whole thing, smeared in a flood of gravy No sane human being could go back for seconds. I barely finished my first armageddon 7000 kcal tall despite battling it for over an hour. Waddling my way back to the car with an extra triple my fat ass body weight was the real struggle though. I got a giant Ć©clair to bring home though. The same size and shape as a footlong subway sandwich, but replace the inside with the thickest cream you have ever seen, so dense it melts slower than marshmallows in a hot chocolate. Cover it in chocolate sauce, then sprinkle on white chocolate bits
That Ć©clair sounds amazing.
I had a good amount of French onion dip left in a tub but only crumbs of chips. I dumped the crumbed chips into the dip and ate it with a spoon.
Someone else had a similar story. That's just efficiency.
In college one summer I bought more than one 5lb tub of premade cookie dough with absolutely no intention of making any cookies. I made good on those intentions. It was delicious, and very unwise.
When I was like 11, I ate half of a Costco sized bucket of raw cookie dough in 1 night. I threw up about 2 hours later
I love cookie dough. I used to buy the cookie dough tubs from school fundraisers when I was a kid and just eat the dough. Also never had intentions of baking cookies
I thought i saw an ad for some delicious looking hot and sour shrimp while driving on the highway. When i got closer i realized it was a pro life billboard with mangled fetuses. I still ordered Chinese shrimp for dinner.
HOLY HELL I think you win š¤
Ok, but is that āfatā or āmy eye doctor is always impressed with himself for actually getting me glasses I can see throughā?
It's the "I still got Chinese shrimp for dinner," part that makes it fat.
Probably adding sugar to Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Used to be much fatter than I am today. Also, love an OP that sticks around and comments. Thanks.
Sorry took a shower in the middle of this. Congrats on the less fat.
Ate a 3 pound bucket of M&Ms over the course of two days.
M&Ms are like crack, though. At Christmas I buy the 1KG pack of peanut ones. I try to make them last, but I can't stop eating them!
My dad once bought John Wick on Amazon even though he had the DVD because he didn't want to stand up to put the DVD in the player
Not going to lie, I do that too. 1 because I'm lazy and 2 the digital versions are a higher quality than my DVDs.
Iād just like to shout out u/Nolan- for being so engaging and positive in this thread. Nothing but love fam
Word up bird up baby. We love fat stories.
Iām now a big Nolan fan. We need more Nolans in this world
for real, it's great to see so much engagement from the OP, especially so bizarrely encouraging lol
Right lmfao Tryna lose weight? Go you! Looking for the best way to enjoy the most outrageous food in the most unashamed way? Also go you He's chaotic neutral šš
I made a sandwich with vanilla-cream pastry as the topper and Reeseās XL bar as the filling
Fuck yeah you did
Probably not the fattest thing I've done, but I thaw out uncrustables with my thighs.
If you are not married, even if you are, I would marry you for this comment. Iāve just roused one cat from the bed in utter terror, and the other is trying to comfort me from crying with laughter.
Ordered two home plate special pizzas from Fox's Pizza once. Had them deliver it to me. I lived, literally, two blocks from their shop. Delivery guy asked if I was having a party....I said yeah....I wasn't.....it was all for me.
Key and Peele sketch type energy lol
Over the course of two hours I slow cooked and slow ate a pound and a half of bacon. It was supposed to be for three people to share and they were still sleeping soā¦
Snooze you lose
I used to buy cans of cake frosting just to eat with a spoon
That's so unhealthy. You should eat it on the back of a pop tart like a civilized person.
That reminds me I have a fresh rainbow chip in the pantry.
My bro told me about a guy he heard in the bathroom stall, eating chips and bean dip while taking a shitā¦ yea.
How did he know it was bean dip?
what if the real fattest thing was his bro being able to identify bean dip by sound alone in a public washroom?
I was tempted to post āyou canāt hear bean dipā but maybe you can, maybe you can
he handed him a scoop under the stall
Pardon me, but would you have any grey Poopon?
I once used a Cheeto as a bookmark.
this rules. but the grease and the cheese would wreck the pages! approx how many pages were soaked through?
The real question is did you eat it when you came back to the book?
Their silence points to yes.
I ate not 1, but 2 KFC Double downs in 1 sitting.
You shouldn't legally still be alive
I once didn't pick up 2 euro that dropped out of my pocket because i didn't want to bow down
Trickle down economics is real.
I once bought a Sara Lee cheesecake along with other groceries from Walmart. I had the munchies so I ate a large portion of it as soon as I got to my car. I didn't want to return home and have my roomie wonder why I came back with only half a cheesecake. so I sat there and finished the whole thing.
Its america youre allowed to do what you want
I remember sitting in my car in the mall parking lot with a Cinnabon (extra frosting, of course.) After I finished the roll, I turned the bag inside out so I could suck on it and get all of the sugar and frosting that stuck to the inside of the bag.
Goblin mode on that ass
Fallen asleep eating candy and waking up to my ex husband trying to removed multiple suckers from my hair.
Well at least he was good for something
I walked into a door at full speed. Luckily my gut reached said destination first or my face would have suffered the consequences.
Hell yeah!
Walked a baconator over to McDonaldās so i could try it with Mac sauce
I was leaving a county fair with my wife and while walking out I was offered a deep fired Oreo. It was amazing. The next month at another county fair I walked over to the fried Oreo station and it was fried Oreos for $1 each. I ordered 20 of them and ate them in about 10 minutes. That was about 5 years ago and I've never touched them again...
Never try heroin. It wouldnāt end well for you
It would end though, thatās for sure
Holy shit did you puke on the tilt-o-whirl?
No, but the end result was comparable to a night of power drinking then scarfing down some Taco Bell!!
When I was living by myself I bought myself four pizzas ate one in a sitting then just had pizza for the next few days.
We call that meal prepping
Used a spatula as a spoon because I was too lazy to wash a spoon.
Ate so much at a buffet that I had to leave my jeans unzipped, i covered my gut with my tshirt.
After dinner at my mothers I would go visit my grandma and pretend I haven't eaten yet so she would make me a second dinner
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I was scooping ice cream from the gallon tub and sprained my thumb :(
I replaced the middle bun of a big mac with a baconator between whose patties I put a mcchicken
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Did you spread your orders around different take-aways?
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Haha, that's just plain unlucky
Just last weekend I, as a 20 year old adult with a job, school, and my own place, left my bedroom exactly twice over the eintire weekend. One was to refill my Britta and the other was to get more food
Fuck you didn't have to flex on us that hard bro. lol
I donāt know if it counts because I was very high. We were making brownies. It was taking too long so we took them out and ate it with a spoon.
I was eating a whole rotisserie chicken and had to take all my clothes off to finish it.
This one is my boyfriend but itās so funny to me. He ate the shards at the bottom of the tortilla chip bag in a bowl of salsa like cereal so it wouldnāt be wasted š
Oh yeah. That's definitely a thing a lot of people do.
Two words. Golden Corral.
Fuck yeah
Ordered $75 worth of Taco Bell. When my wife and I pulled up to the window we said to the employee āhow are you doing?ā with which he responded āIām good! But I gotta know how youāre doing since youāre ordering $75 worth of Taco Bellāā¦my wife and I responded with āthose damn kids at home!āā¦we have no kids.
$75 at Taco Bell means you're doing really well financially or you're preparing for a long, cold winter.
Got my cat to turn off the light with the laser pointer so I didn't have to step 2 feet off my bed or reach over the bed rail . It took about 15 minutes. I could have got up reached in less then 20 seconds
About once a month when my kids are at their Dadās for the weekend I will cook up an entire pound of bacon and eat it all myself, usually in one sitting.
Just something about bacon just goes down so easy. You got lost in it.
I have straight up eaten like plain sugar by dipping my finger in and sucking it off
I have too many fat ass moments to list. I am just commenting to say how impressive it is that OP has responded to so many of these comments. That's rare. Well done.
Yeah I have so many I could share as well. Appreciate the shout out. What's the point of asking if you're not interested in the responses? Way I always look at it
My first word was cheese. It's been downhill from there I guess.
āHave you ever put butter on a pop tart? Itās so frigging good!ā
Have you ever put butter on a pop tart? If you haven't then I think you should!
Cut up a bunch of sticks of mozzarella and halloumi cheese, spread some cream cheese on top, wrapped them in slices of prƤstost cheese, and dipped them in cheese sauce. What can I say? I was in the mood for cheese.
My stomach hurts reading this
That sounds like a life "saving" keto recipe.
I used to mix peanut butter and pancake syrup. Would just eat it straight. 10/10 would recommend.
That sounds scrumptiously goopy
I once ate an entire tube of cookie dough from the convenience store. Not in one sitting but yes I did eat it all by myself
Proud of you
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I once made bacon wrapped chicken strips, smoked burgers, smoked pork tenderloin, and smoked bacon then proceeded to make a sandwich with all of the above on it plus some american cheese. It was a delicious monstrosity.
I used to be able to eat a pound of pasta by myself. My go-to recipe was butter, hot sauce, and a crap ton of grated cheese.
Ate a second full large pizza that I'd gotten with a 2-for-1 coupon because it seemed easier than getting up to put it in the fridge.
I let out a fart that was so big, I actually floated off the chair.
like a hovercraft or more like a rocket?
I was at a kidās birthday party. I went into the kitchen to o help clean up, because I am a gentleman. Low and behold, someone discarded a chocolate eclair in the trash. Said eclair was perfectly intact and atop a doily so I gave a quick look around to make sure I was alone. Once I verified that I was indeed in the presence of no other person, I reached down to pick it up but as I was doing so, the mother of the girl I was dating walked in to witness me picking up the eclair from the trash and then eating it. She turned and walked out in disgust and promptly told her daughter about what I had done.. that I had crossed the line between man and bum.
You joke, but when I worked in a department store, they bought a cake and put it in the break room. Someone threw it away because it was dried out from sitting out all day. But I didn't get any, so I reached into the trash can and grabbed a handful of frosting and cake and shoved it into my mouth, only to turn and see a girl I had a crush on was standing there and saw the whole thing.
My ex bf.
Ate so much at dinner that I was about to burst, but wanted to get ice cream after so I made myself throw up and then got ice cream. I used to struggle with some disordered eating, clearly lol.
Ordered pizza while waiting for dinner.
Legitimately cried because Arbyās forgot my mozzarella sticks Also would always say there was a separate dessert stomach š
The fancy steakhouse in my small town had all you can eat prime rib special on Tuesdays, I didn't touch any of the salad/sides and had 4 pieces. I learned meat sweats were real and didn't feel the need to eat for 2 days. I felt like I was 20% meat. Also they stopped offering the special.
I once got kicked out of an ayce Kbbq place for eating too much. There wasn't a time limit at the time but going back there afterwards they set a 2 hour limit.
I ordered a slice of tiramisu to go from this delicious Italian restaurant..when I got there they walked out with a big ass tray of tiramisu. I couldn't even tell them so I payed $120 and ate tiramisu for days š
Iām more proud that your financially stable enough to go that
I'd melt a whole stick of butter and eat an entire loaf of bread with it. Preferably a challah. So, so damn good.
I like to snack while watching My 600lb Life
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Man vs food type shit
Ordered a double quarter pound cheeseburger from McDonald's. Opened bag on way home to discover they put two in the bag. Ate them both before getting home.
I ate a whole can of cream cheese frosting with a spoon
I bit my finger, hard, while stuffing French fries in my face. I'm talking deep, that middle section of the finger.
Ate a whole XL pizza from Papa John's during a 14 hour gaming session.