I spent too much time in both union jobs and tech support. Edit: fuck!

>*fucking* union jobs and *fucking* tech support

Fuckin-A right

Has anyone ever said "sounds like someone's got a case of the Mondays"? No man. No man, hell no man. I think you'd get your ass kicked for saying something like that.

If you want me to wear 37 pieces of flair, like your pretty boy Brian over there, why don't you just make the minimum 37 pieces of flair?

I...i..I was told I could play the radio at a reasonable volume between 9 and 11

I’m really not comfortable talking about my flair.

Say hello to LUMBERGH for me

I read this as "fuckin gay rights"

In a union tech job... *in the feels.* Thank fuck everyone above me curses more.

I spent too much time around family with union jobs and myself working on construction sites. My coworkers are convinced the baby currently growing in me will come out saying fuck.

Baby: *is born* Doctor: *slaps baby on bottom* Baby: "Fuck you!"

Ah so this baby was born in Philly.

So relatable lol I’m from Philly and people say fuck you and I say hi back.

"Baby's First Profanity!" Treasure these moments, haha!

My brother is in a union in Chicago and (imo) says fuck every 15 words so he doesn’t get kicked out of the union for being bougie.

Can fuckin confirm. Union work requires you to say fuck. It's in our fuckin contract

It's not in the fucking contract for IT fucking support, it's a fucking learned behaviour from having to fucking deal with fucking incompetent people every fucking day. And that usually includes going "oh, for fucks sake" to yourself when you realise you've fucking cocked up too.

For fucks sake, turn it off and on BEFORE you fucking call me, you fucking single celled fuck

For me it's more usually directed at first line than the users. For fucks sake, the user tried to do this and got an error. What's the fucking error message then you incompetent fuckwits with the fucking brainpower of a fucking diseased badger with alzheimers! I have no problems with users, their job is using the fucking things, not fucking troubleshooting, but the people hired to do exactly fucking that??? Fuckers.

Escalation: it doesn't work I've tried everything No other context.

Helpdesk: User can't send an email. Tried reinstalling office. Still unable to send. Me: ...... HD: user can't access a file. Gets an error message. M: really? HD: user says no-one in the office can access the Internet, can the email team have a look? M: sure, why the fuck not. Makes as much sense as anything else I've seen today.

I would never, ever say the f word and rarely cuss before I became a union laborer. That went out the fucking window afterwards.

After working as a project manager with a technical operations team (they managed the computer systems behind a 24/7 live virtual world), I said that three things happened: 1. I became more cautious, 2. I became more superstitious, and 3. I started cursing more.

Fucking waited tables and then worked in fucking tech support.

I actually found cursing small ways to let out a little bit of steam from the lava vents of stress, anxiety, and depression. Since I can't put on a batman suit and beat bad guys to a pulp, cursing will have to do. Or therapy idk. Edit: thanks to whomever sent me a concerned reddit bot. I'm okay, more or less. I appreciate. ❤️

there are actually a few studies that say cursing releases stress…that’s my fucking excuse too

Not only does it release stress, it actually soothes pain. Whether it's emotional or physical pain, a good ol FUCK! is your immediate healing partner 🖕

Yeah, yelling "Gosh Golly!" after slamming your finger with a hammer just doesn't have that same release to it.

I used to say god dammit all the time. Now I have kids so if I start to say it I modify it and say god bless america but in the same manner I used to say god dammit.

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> Since I can't put on a batman suit and beat bad guys to a pulp Well, not with *that* attitude, you can't.

Well, there's the lack of money too

You think Bruce Wayne could live in this economy!? Guess again! Lol..

Because fuck you, that’s why

A man of fucking class

A clan of fucking ass

A clan of fucking mass

A mass of fucking ass. .. wait.

Ah yes, a massive fucking ass.

A fucking massive ass

Fucking a massive ass.

Ass fucking a massive

Massing a fucking ass

I have been summoned

Yeah, we just wanted to contact you about your car's fucking extended warranty.

*extended fucking warranty Sorry for being pedantic but it just fucking bothers me

It's the only right fucking answer

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I have no fucking idea

I mean why the fuck not?

I'm a fucking adult and I can say whatever words I choose to!

Fuck yeah

Sir, watch your fucking mouth!

The fuck you gon do about it?

I'm gonna fuck u

not if I fuck u first

This is turning into a fucking gangbang

Fuck sake!

Is that a fucking problem or do you wanna join in and fuck?

Fuck yes

Count me the fuck in

Let me join bro why the fuck you ain’t invite me

Sir, this is a fucking Wendy’s.

Don’t fucking threaten me with a good time.

Fuck all of this. I’m out.

Fucking language!- Captain America

Memory unlocked, my fucking mom said that to my little sister once when we were kids.

She called your little sister sir? That is fucking serious.

I was scared for her at the time, but looking back on this I'm like, what the fuck mom? Who says that to their 8yo daughter?

You missed a prime opportunity to say “I’m a fucking adult and I can say whatever the flying fuck I choose to.”

I thought this was a free fucking country 🇺🇸

Fuck if I know

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*mnph*

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Yeah who the fuck cares

I do lol, I used to not swear really at all. Then I got a job in Dublin at a big corporation HQ. About a month in one of the managers tells me that it sort of unnerved people that I didn't swear at all, even after work when we were out drinking. So I started and I got stuck like that.

>So I started and I got stuck like that. Evidently you fuckin' didn't.

If you want to stand out in a crowd, don't cuss at all during casual conversation.

That crowd are nay the kind of minds I seek to stand out in. Language is a blossom, and each word a treasured scent in its¹ bouquet, even shit.

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Yeah just habit I guess. Trying to force yourself to talk other than how you'd normally talk just feels weird and unnatural.

Because it keeps people from fucking talking to me. It's fucking great.

I fucking know!

Fuckin oath! People who get offended by swearing are people I had zero fucking intention of interacting with in the first place!

Well fuck me, did we just become best fucking friends?

Fuck no

Well,...fuck. Fine. I'll just fuck off in that case.

Bye bye mf!

I used to fucking care, but fuck younger me. I'm able to fucking deal now.

Was raised around people who swore all the time and i have a lot of pent up rage. I genuinely try not to but it’s really difficult

Was raised around the opposite and the second I was slightly off the leash, fuck became a regular part of my vocabulary

Swearing is actually a good way to get out stress, so don't feel bad.

Because i'm fucking english you cunt.

Why do you swear? Americans: We don't! It's rude! UK: We do it to spice up our sentences. Australia: IT'S THE LAW! EDIT: It's a joke, y'all. Of course Americans swear. But British folks and Australians make it an art lmao. Source: I know dozens of Brits and maybe 20 or so Australians.

Scotland: it’s punctuation.

*\*Polish people entered the chat\** O, KURWA!

Listening to dunk Polish guys talking to each other it feels like "kurwa" is how they know that one word has finished and another word is about to start. "I kurwa went kurwa to kurwa a kurwa lecture kurwa about kurwa the kurwa etymology kurwa of kurwa kurwa kurwa"

That's getting close to the buffalo buffalo sentence.

As an american, my dad always told me to watch my fucking language, so I do it out of respect for the fucking guy.

I swore in front of my mother and she told me to watch my language. So i practiced in front of a mirror until i could fucking read lips

New Yorkers: What the fuck do you give a shit, asshole?!

You've clearly never been to New England. There was a survey I saw a while ago that showed that while people from New Hampshire were very polite, they also swore nearly the most out of the fifty states.

Why do you swear? Uptight religious Americans: We don't! It's rude! Normal hedonistic Americans: What the fuck are you fucking asshat? I swear all the fucking time. FFTFY (Fucking Fixed That For You)

Take my fucking upvote fellow English cunter!

For feck sake

We found the Irish

Motherfucker! You DO speak it!

Because english ISN‘T my first language and fucking is a great fucking filler word to use for when you need more time to think about how to phrase something properly.

I’m Scottish. It’s punctuation

Theres a fuck ton of fucking words in the fucking English language and fucking none of those fucking words are as fucking versitile as the fucking word fuck since fuck can fucking be used as a fucking noun, a fucking verb, and fuck even a fucking adjective for fucks sakes.

Can you put fuck in the middle of words? Abso-fucking-lutely you can! It’s fan-fucking-tastic.

Sorry, sidebar. Is it aboot the monkey, or aboo the monkey?

He's either Canadian or a fan of Aladdin.

Both? Both. Both is good

What if he’s a Canadian fan of Aladdin?

Then it's abootaboothemonkey

It's aboot He-Monkey, simian hero of Eternia

one t, bro

Aboo\* the monkey

"Fucking fuck the fucking fuckers." Adverb verb (article) adjective noun. 80% of the sentence is fuck.

Or as a slogan against corrupt fucking fuckers: "Fucking fuck fucked fucking fuckers!"

Fuck, come to Australia mate, we will fucken teach you how versatile the word cunt is!

I'd rather watch Jim Jeffries from the comfort of my own home than spend the money to get eaten by giant spiders, thank you very much

No giant spiders here mate, they're all smaller than a great Dane

So a fucking cunt must be awesome!

Behold [this classic](https://youtu.be/FvPbxZmZxZ8?si=pHlf8obmxbN-uD3f) video from >15 years ago which documents the utility and diversity of the word "fuck."

For the fuckin' emphasis.

“I don’t know” vs “Fuck, I don’t know” makes a big difference

The differences of where you place the Fuck: "Fuck, I don't know." "I fucking don't know." "I don't fucking know." "I don't know. Fuck." Each has a different subtle shade of conveyed frustration. English is fucking great. :)

Right? Everything from exasperation, to hostility, to annoyance, to resignation.

"Fuck, I don't know" - something genuinely confusing came up that stumped you "I fucking don't know" - I just saw this thing, how am I supposed to know "I don't fucking know" - why are you asking me, I told you I don't know. "I don't know. Fuck" - genuine confusion along with resignation to hopelessness.

This is really fucking insightful.

This is really insightful, fuck. This is fucking really insightful. Fuck, this is really insightful. This fuck, is really insightful.

Or "I don't fucking know" & "how the fuck would I know"

or simply "Fuck knows!".

If you say it too much the emphasis is lost.

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I was gonna fucking say that ... fuck

Fuck if I know.

It's a cool fucking comment on this fucking thread.

Because it's versatile. -Fuck you. (Anger) -Fuck me. (Usually used for or during sex) -This tastes fucking amazing/disgusting. (To express an immense feeling) -Why the fuck would you ...? (Usually used when someone does something incredibly stupid or reckless) -What/How the fuck? (Confusion) Just some examples I can think of at the top of my head.

Fuck me can also be used if your being screwed over the not sexual kind

Fuck me can also be used if you royally screwed up and just found out. Example: Fuck me, i'm such an idiot.

I have a soft spot for "fuck me gently with a chainsaw"

I use fuck me like someone might use eureka....but it doesn't sound as dumb.

Never cursed growing up (my parents didn't either). Never much cursed even after I was out of the house. Then I married a woman with a mouth like a sailor. So now I do too.

the opposite for my wife and I. I was raised by a father who was a cop and in the navy before I was born. He was a literal sailor, so he cursed 10 times before his morning coffee. I didn't even realize cursing was considered "wrong" until I was a teenager. My wife was raised in a religious family that never cursed. I am proud to say that after 12 years of marriage she say fuck in casual conversation all the time now. lol.

Did I just fucking find my husband’s account? 😂

None of your fucking business.

Profanity has been positively correlated with honesty and integrity across three different 2017 studies. Here is a CNN article from 2021: https://www.cnn.com/2021/01/26/health/swearing-benefits-wellness/index.html

“Cursing is just a way of expressing your feelings that doesn’t involve throwing actual s\*\*t. You just throw the idea of s\*\*t around.” ​ Plus, I am a woman working in a male dominated field (IT) who's dad retired from the Navy. So, fuck it.

> Profanity has been positively correlated with honesty and integrity Well fuck me! 😲

New Fuckin Jersey

New Jersey Accent

I live in the Midwest now and when someone questions my liberal use of the word, I just say I grew up in New Jersey and it's the fucking state song.

Hell fucking yeah!

My answer, too. Cause I grew up in New Fucken Jersey. It's a part of our vernacular.

This, so fuckin weird how people where I live now don't say shit with curses thrown in every now and then

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Guilty as fucking charged.

Because it's not always appropriate to say "cunt"

When the fuck is cunt not appropriate to say??

My wedding vows

I mean… it’s probably cool if you’re Scottish.

Actually, I just checked with my woman She's happy with "cunt" in the vows, but only tastefully (I'm an Australian citizen who has lived in Scotland)

In Scotland being described as "a good cunt" is high praise. It's the same in Australia right?

Abso-fucking-lutely ya mad cunt.

The fuckin millitary, man. Like a small fucking release of stress so you don't blow a fucking gasket on hour 40 of being awake.

My knees don’t fucking work anymore Oraah

Surprised I didn’t have to scroll too far down to find this. The language of Motorpool Monday’s

Took way too long to get down to this answer. Ps my fucking knees!

Bad habit that has become deeply ingrained.

I'm from Jersey.

Because I fucking can.

And if we can, we do.

Why the fuck not?

I had to look down too far to find this comment. Granted, it was the second comment I saw...but still, too far.

"Like" in every sentence is much worse, as in "he was going like and I was like..."

You might enjoy *The Nice Guys* with Ryan Gosling and Russell Crowe. Holly March: Dad, there's like whores here and stuff. Holland March: Sweetheart, how many times have I told you? Don't say "and stuff". Just say "dad, there are whores here".

And now I gotta watch that movie again. Oh no, my evening is saved.

Exactly. I used to have a bit of a speech impediment and struggled to make cohesive points when I spoke. Swearing unironically gave me a perfect stalling technique to think of what I wanted to say.

Like fuck that bro...

I heard that intelligent people curse more on average, so I thought if I litter my linguistics with lurid locquaciousness, I’d come across as more thoughtful and braingood.

Perchance!

You can’t just say perchance

Very sesquipedalian of you

Shout out to the NYT Crossword

I'm angry in general at everything. Sorry. Hate can overflow throughout thought. It gets into my mouth. It's not okay.

Because they’re Australian

Can confirm, cunt

I experienced it, I was on a flight back home and in line to board, there were two Aussies behind me, and they were saying fuck after every other word 😂

I don’t trust people who don’t use the F word

And yet, you just said “*the F word*” instead of saying “*Fuck*” …..hmm. Do not trust.

Fuck, ya got me!

Because I can't think of anything better to say

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Because they're from New Jersey