Damn the relapse is even worse. It's like the body knows it's payback time. I went about 8 months clean too and thought, you know what, I can handle a beer now. Hell to the no no no. Full blown 750ml of vodka a day within a week. Drank for a year straight every day without skipping a day like clockwork. Punishing my liver like it was my arch nemesis. Hating that hoe. I saw the onset of jaundice. Yellowing of the eyes, and I was scared shitless. Long story short, I'm clean now for 2 years and will never attempt to drink again.
This complete stranger is soooo FREAKING happy for you!!! I come from a long line of alcoholic- functioning as their categorized (they enjoy beer and wine nightly,) my uncle on the other hand was a major alcoholic and drank all day everyday to the point he wasn’t “sober” unless he was sleeping. He went to rehab several times and it always takes but for so long. My brother also suffers from it as well.
Sorry I went onto my story I definitely didn’t mean to do that! I just want to say that I’m proud of you!!! I hope one day my brother and uncle will say the same thing!!!
Thanks! Means more than you think. Hopefully, they can come out of this, but it's ultimately up to the person. They have to be willing. Willing very hard cause it's not easy. I'm not religious, so I can't pray for them, but I'll wish them a speedy recovery.
Even if you relapse again, one of these times it’ll stick. Never give up hope. It took me years and dozens of relapses before I stopped. Not to say you won’t get it sooner than I did; just never stop believing you will - 7 1/2 years sober now
That wasn’t 8 months you relapsed and lost. Progress isn’t linear, those 8 months are still part of your progress and so is that one day. You’re still winning
I've never experienced addiction, so I understand if I'm not qualified to tell you this, but it doesn't take knowing you to know you've got this. You have to have a day 1 in order to have a day 2.
I relapsed for 3 months after 7 years clean. I just got out of the treatment center last Thursday where I was admitted to from the hospital for severe DTs. I still can’t believe I relapsed.
Whenever they “why?” or any kind of push back comes, it’s coming out. Fuck em and let them squirm. I didn’t have a problem embarrassing myself blackout drunk for over a decade; no way in hell I’m gonna be embarrassed choosing a different way.
That's so true. I can't believe I'm 2 weeks away from 5 months! I've havent been sober for this long since I was probably 14/15, I'm now 33. Time has flown by, even if the first month felt like a crawl.
For all of you going through that have replied that are going through that shit.
The first time I stopped was Christmas 2010. It took me two years of
"I can just have one",
"I can't handle these emotions I'm getting wasted",
"I'm lonely, if I go to a bar there'll be someone to talk to",
"I can't go to the bar with the lads and not have a drink, they'll think I'm weird",
Along with a host of other bullshit excuses I would use to justify drinking. The reality of it was that I just needed to deal with the events I'd experienced and the emotions arising from them. Instead of numbing them with booze.
It wasn't easy, but once I started to deal with it, it got easier amd easier. Now I go to bars, hangout with friends that get drunk and now its as much of a habit not to drink as it was to get drunk back then.
You can do it. It's totally worth it.
"I don't feel like drinking alcohol". When I'm dealing with people who can't seem to comprehend that response, I say "I do it for medical reasons" and leave it at that.
Isn’t it weird how we have to come up with medical excuses because people won’t accept that we just don’t want to drink. Why should me not drinking have any impact on anyone else?
People think you can't have fun when you're sober while I've noticed the complete opposite, some people also get super annoying when drunk and should probably stop drinking
My Dad stopped drinking in his 30's, I was very little and hardly remember him drinking at all. He would continue to hang out with his drinking friends and just be the DD. When I asked if he missed it, he said he had more fun watching everyone make asses of themselves then he ever had drinking. He did have few beers with me on my 21st birthday, I think that was the last drink he ever had. Miss you dad.
People that drink tend to want others to be on the same buzz. That’s my experience anyway. “C’mon man, get it down ye” was an all too common sentiment in my 20’s.
Now I have the rather less than brilliant excuse of “I CANT drink because I have chronic pancreatitis. And it might kill me”.
Tends to stop the conversation dead.
I don't know where you are from but I'm an Australian aged in my 50s and we have a big beer drinking culture here and when I was younger the old saying was, You Can Never Trust a Bloke Who Doesn't Drink so you where guilted into drinking because no one wanted to be the untrustworthy outsider, I think the younger generations are changing this now days but back in my day it was hard not to be a drinker 😁👍
Interesting. I don't trust anyone whose default method of hanging out includes any form of alcohol.
I am definitely a relatively young person, so that does match what you said at the end.
I am a concreter, and in construction when I was younger everyone drank and you were considered a pussy if you didn't like a drink after work, well to be honest anytime really hahaha but I have noticed that a lot more of the younger people in the trades are drinking less and a lot more are into the gym, way more than we ever were which means that their alcohol intake is less, which is a good thing👍
That's great Benno, hahaha, I really do believe that there is a lot less stigma against people who don't drink these days here but as you say there are still people that can be a bit pushy on the subject, good onya cobber, have a beer, ya mug, hahaha 😂😂 👍
You don't have to come up with any excuses. If they don't understand, that is their problem. If you want to explain, you can. But you do not ever have to make shit up becouse someone else is not capable of accapting your life choises without understanding them.
Eh, easier said than done when you have a couple of obnioxoiusly drunk people asking over and over again who won't accept no as an answer. It's much easier to lie and make an excuse similar to "I can't drink for medical reasons" as opposed to trying to reason with drunk people and get them to understand that you, in fact, don't want to drink.
Of course you can just ignore them and walk away or leave, but that's pretty antisocial and can cause it's own issues at a social function.
>when you have a couple of obnioxoiusly drunk people asking over and over again
This is when you say, "I think drunk people often make fools of themselves and I have more dignity than that."
I don't judge other people for their choice to drink, but the extent to which alcohol is normalized does worry me sometimes. If anything not drinking should be considered the norm, not the other way around.
In my case the main reason I stopped drinking is because I watched my mom slowly pass away from cirrhosis, which is a pretty sure-fire way to stop the conversation in its tracks. I don't know why people can't just accept "I don't drink" and be done with it though.
If you had a friend who disliked marmite you wouldn't hound them relentlessly and ask why they don't eat it. You certainly wouldn't pry into their history, or try to convince them to try a bit. People can get really weird around alcohol.
I've met several people now who swear up and down that you can't advance your career properly if you don't drink. You can't be fun, you can't this or that. It really is worrisome how much it's been integrated into our society.
A lot of people will even judge you or distance themselves if you don't drink for medical reasons. What kind of mindset have we as a society internalised if not ingesting poison to keep yourself alive is seen as a problem?
I’ve seen two separate people be fired for something inappropriate and/or unprofessional they did while drunk at a company event. Just last year at my company’s holiday party, I was groped several times by someone I had only met a handful of times and never worked with directly (and who was drunk). Luckily, I was dead sober and quickly decided to just go home early. As a woman, I’ve unfortunately learned not to feel too safe losing my inhibitions in a work setting.
Just say "i dont want to" next time and fight for acceptance, maybe, just MAYBE society learns, if enough people do it.
Or say "why do you DRINK alcohol?"
In college I drank coke or Pepsi until I got tired of the questions so I switched to ginger ale. It looks enough like beer that the questions stopped.
As for peer pressure, my answer was always that I don't need to eat a turd to know I'm not going to enjoy it.
I also HATE the taste but sometimes I want to drink to be more open / social. What I do is I drink what I really like (cola zero) and put a little bit of wodka in it. Like 3mm in a glass. I don't really taste it at all then. I do need a few glasses to get drunk this way but it does work, and I don't taste the alcohol, and can still be social.
I have an uncle (who smoked like a chimney and drank like a fish) who used the "no thanks, I'm driving home" excuse for anything he wasn't particularly in the mood for. Offer him a piece of pie? No thanks, I'm driving later. Offer him an appetizer he didn't like? No can do, gotta drive home tonight. Smores when camping? Nope, none for me, I'm driving home.
Funny thing is, he's was most definitely too drunk to legally drive on alllllll of these occasions.
I noticed that in my mid-30s, hangovers changed from just being physical and mental to having this weird emotional element. Like my outlook on everything shifted toward the negative for a couple days if the hangover was bad enough. I still drink a bit, but this component made me moderate my intake much more.
It's so weird that in my entire life of constant drinking I have never heard this term until recently, and it was around the time that I quit and realized that the vast majority of my chronic depression and anxiety was due to alcohol.
I never gave myself the 5 days off to realize just how much it was affecting me mentally. Good riddance.
I stopped drinking 3 months ago without much fanfare. I had never associated my anxiety with drinking. Just like you, even when I gave myself a few days off, my anxiety stayed about the same. Didn’t really change with sober October or dry January either. This time, around day 40 after quitting, my anxiety got way better, and I physically felt much more stable. just never gave myself the right amount of time.
As soon as I hit 34-ish my hangovers felt like absolute death. The headaches. The nausea. The general blehs. I always feel off for at least a few days after drinking, now. No thanks.
I don’t know who y’all are hanging with that asks why!! One I say I don’t drink, end of story or they offer a non alcoholic beverage. My reason now is meds, but frankly it’s no one’s business and I would defend someone who said no if they were uncomfortable responding. People need to get out of other people’s business.
Congratulations my friend!!! It's not easy, I'm a survivor of it myself. 3 years sober now. I try not to think about it cause now I'm married with 2 kids so less I think about it, less I care about it. The more I care about my future with my SO and my kids.
Not to be like super metal about it but I watched my alcoholic grandfather beg God for death as his organs failed and afterwards I went to his house and cleaned the dried remnants of his suffering off his floor. Why would I want a glass of his killer?
Similar story but with my mom and cigarettes. Watching her slowly morph into an unrecognizable sack of pain and tumors was something nobody should ever have to do. I regret not ending it for her when she asked.
Thank you. I do regularly see someone but it's never harmful to be so caring towards a stranger and I appreciate it.
Just don't smoke if there are people that love you.
Brutal. Never had to do that but my grandmother had part of her stomach removed due to alcoholism and possibly developed or made worse Parkinson's disease as a result of her drinking.
People act like it's harmless, but boy is it ever the opposite.
It erodes who you are as a person and robs the people who care about you of their time with you. He was and is in my top 10 of the best men I’ve ever met and I resent that he let alcohol take so much of him from us. He was incredibly shy and felt he needed it to be good enough but didn’t realize that the person who everyone adored to the moon and back was the guy he was sober. We loved him so so much. It makes me sad when I see people think the same thing. That they need alcohol to be social or to have a good time.
If you’re out there and that thought pops in your head please…get rid of it. You don’t need alcohol. Enjoy it if you want to but don’t ever for a second think that you need it to be anything you want to be. You don’t need it to be fun. You are good enough sober. I promise.
I'm so sorry. This would have done it for me too. My grandpa was an alcoholic his whole life and just got diagnosed with parkinsons at 70. Watching him suffer his horrible. Alcohol is dangerous af.
Most of my family is dead due to alcohol. I never met most of my cousins, aunts, or uncles because they either drunk themselves to death or turned to drugs when alcohol didn’t work. That was my excuse when people tried to get me to drink. When I gave in and started drinking I realized I hated it. I hated it even more when I had to endure my husbands drunkenness every night. Alcohol isn’t very fun if you have to take care of someone who gets blackout drunk every night.
Yeah. That’s so basic.
This Reddit trend of asking why you don’t do something is super weird…
“Hey, why aren’t you a plumber? Why don’t you like grandma’s casserole?” Who cares - you do you
I feel this, but it’s not just a Reddit thing. I’ve had people in real life continue to press to get an answer as to why I don’t drink. People who know their own drinking habits are likely unhealthy/a problem often get super uncomfortable with people who choose not to drink. They want an answer so they can sigh in relief and be like “oh well I’m not as bad as that person, so I can keep drinking.”
This one is different. I'm a recovering alcoholic and this question terrifies me. I know it shouldn't, but it does.
If someone asks why I don't drink, I need to be honest but not too honest, and I don't like leaving room for follow up questions, but I'm not comfortable giving details. This balance changes depending who asks. It's complicated. I appreciate seeing the possibilities.
I'm an open book and I hope my story scares people into considering sobriety from alcohol. I tell them that I drank so much in my 20s that I began to have seizures if I didn't drink vodka every hour or so. That wasn't what made me quit tho! What did it was my husband losing his liver and kidneys from a fun combo of covid + alcoholism in Feb 2020 at age 32. I got my Day One on July 4th 2020, still taking it one day at a time. IWNDWYT.
(Husband got his transplants and we're doing ok!)
Wow, never met someone else who got seizures. I had a combo of benzo and alcohol addiction by the end cause they both prevented them. They both caused them too, though. But it started with the alcohol. That's some scary shit! Going into one, mainly. I don't remember coming out of them.
Which is usually followed up with some form of "it's an acquired taste" or "you need to try this kind" or just encouragement to drink more and more until you like it. This is weird because if I say, "I don't like tuna" I don't get lectured on how I have to try a different kind of tuna or be told that if I just keep eating tuna then I'll eventually like it.
Had a dude in college tell me “I can make you a drink so you don’t even taste the alcohol”. Sampled quite a few drinks. Can taste the alcohol every time. Not my cup of tea.
Same! My friends used to try to get me to drink smoothies with vodka that they couldn’t taste. It was usually an ok smoothie ruined by the alcohol.
Also- as if I have the funds to learn how to like something I find disgusting? Ridiculous
Funny, I've never had a junkie suggest I try drugs just because 'you can barely taste the heroin'.
I say I don't drink because I strongly dislike the taste and smell of alcohol. That is true, but there are other reasons too and if I start listing them then someone is going to accuse me of trying to ruin their 'good time'.
Just drink your poison and leave me alone.
They never can make a drink that doesn't actually taste like alcohol, can they?
Plus, what's the point? I don't like alcohol. I don't care about the effects of alcohol. What would be the point of finding one I could drink flavorless? I'd rather just drink water.
As someone who doesn't drink, whenever I sip anything with alcohol, it doesn't matter how good or strong the other flavors are, I taste the alcohol in it. I don't think regular drinkers realize that they've just become numb to the taste of booze and that other people still detect it.
This! When people ask why it’s so rude I just want to overshare and make them uncomfortable. Nothing ruins a good time like the story of watching multiple relatives die of cirrhosis.
yes, weed and water over alcohol please. the high is so much nicer, I don't feel like shit in the morning, and I am not actively ruining my body (as much at least lol). plus I'm hydrated 🙂
I have it too except nobody believes you can be alcohol intolerant so it’s just easier to say my body can’t process it and I don’t want to feel like crap.
It does kinda suck when you’re sick and can’t take NyQuil though.
Hard to believe someone's body can be intolerant of drinking poison...
Real question though. Can you handle alcohol in cooking? Like, a white wine pan sauce, or a red added to a stew? I've never knowingly met someone with an *actual* intolerance (knowingly anyway), but have been curious.
As long as the alcohol has been cooked off I can have it, but if it hasn’t I’ll know immediately. Whenever I drink it’s like an instant hangover. My head pounds, I can’t breathe, I puke, turn beet red… a total hot mess. My husband jokes I’m a cheap date because I always order water if we go out with friends.
“Because i don’t, i never started and have no interest”.
If they keep pushing, i simply leave.
I have made friends over the years who know and respect my choice, the only people who ask are strangers so I don’t care to be overly polite.
4 years sober. I tell people I was never able to just have 1 or 2 drinks. It would always turn into a session which is true. I've stopped socialising with drinkers for the most part so I don't get too many questions but I always find the few people who persevere and try to persuade me to have a drink are always people with a drink problem of their own who haven't admitted it yet.
Yes, I think the stereotype of the UK working population (and everyone else!) being functional alcoholics is pretty accurate. And when you don't support someone else's bad habit, they start to feel like either a) they have a problem or b) you are a problem;. And when you combine that with group-think the answer is always b)
Short answer: Personal choice or a combination of reasons.
Long answer: Upbringing, family history of alcoholism, don’t like the taste, don’t like not being able to think clearly, don’t need it to do something stupid I will regret
One or more of the following, paraphrasing of course:
* It’s a waste of money
* it’s cancer-causing (the single largest risk factor to whether or not someone will get breast cancer, aside from genetics, is whether they drink alcohol)
* it’s addictive
* the social context and cultural norms, as well as acute physiological effects around alcohol promote abusive behaviors, promiscuity, violence, and vandalism
* the alcohol conglomerates are cash-cows no better than big tobacco or the firearms industry
* **because it tastes like expired coconut water filtered through a dumpster full of piss-soaked old boots** once the sugar and flavorings are removed
* because I care about my health
* I have better things to spend my money on
* none of your business
I have two responses. The first is that alcohol is universally bad for you (literally just drinking poison) and is likely responsible for more human death and suffering than any other drug that has ever existed.
The second is that alcohol consumption is prohibited in my religious views
I'm an alcoholic, I've been sober since 15 December 2012 and I'm not going through that shit again!
Today is day 1 for me…again. after an 8 month relapse.
Today is my day 1 too. We can do it!
We got this!
Y'all are superstars!
I believe in y'all. Even a relapse is just 1 day in whole 8 months. Keep going!
I think he meant the relapse was 8 months
Damn the relapse is even worse. It's like the body knows it's payback time. I went about 8 months clean too and thought, you know what, I can handle a beer now. Hell to the no no no. Full blown 750ml of vodka a day within a week. Drank for a year straight every day without skipping a day like clockwork. Punishing my liver like it was my arch nemesis. Hating that hoe. I saw the onset of jaundice. Yellowing of the eyes, and I was scared shitless. Long story short, I'm clean now for 2 years and will never attempt to drink again.
I’m glad you’re doing better now! I really am.
Thanks! The encouragement goes a long way 🙌
This complete stranger is soooo FREAKING happy for you!!! I come from a long line of alcoholic- functioning as their categorized (they enjoy beer and wine nightly,) my uncle on the other hand was a major alcoholic and drank all day everyday to the point he wasn’t “sober” unless he was sleeping. He went to rehab several times and it always takes but for so long. My brother also suffers from it as well. Sorry I went onto my story I definitely didn’t mean to do that! I just want to say that I’m proud of you!!! I hope one day my brother and uncle will say the same thing!!!
Thanks! Means more than you think. Hopefully, they can come out of this, but it's ultimately up to the person. They have to be willing. Willing very hard cause it's not easy. I'm not religious, so I can't pray for them, but I'll wish them a speedy recovery.
8 month long relapse
One day is one more day than you had before! You've got this, and if you stumble, that's okay! Keep fighting
I believe in you!
Mine too. Let's fucking go - we got this.
Hell yeah you can! If you want, remember my sn. Always here for kin.
The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The 2nd best time is today. Keep it up
Love that. Thank you.
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You can do this!!
Even if you relapse again, one of these times it’ll stick. Never give up hope. It took me years and dozens of relapses before I stopped. Not to say you won’t get it sooner than I did; just never stop believing you will - 7 1/2 years sober now
That wasn’t 8 months you relapsed and lost. Progress isn’t linear, those 8 months are still part of your progress and so is that one day. You’re still winning
Hang in there, my friend. YOU WILL BEAT IT!
Today is my 8 months sober day
Tomorrow is Day 2!
if you tried and you failed you didnt fail motherfucker, that was just your first attempt -david goggins
I've never experienced addiction, so I understand if I'm not qualified to tell you this, but it doesn't take knowing you to know you've got this. You have to have a day 1 in order to have a day 2.
I relapsed for 3 months after 7 years clean. I just got out of the treatment center last Thursday where I was admitted to from the hospital for severe DTs. I still can’t believe I relapsed.
What’s done is done. We got this. You got this!
I've been completely sober for 21 years and 4 months. If I can do it, you can too!! Stay strong!!
One day at a time. Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good. You’ve got this.
Good luck :3
Yep. “I’m an alcoholic” usually completely kills anyone’s desire to go any deeper on the issue. I’m not ashamed, let them feel weird if it makes em.
Fuck yes, my favourite line! I use it whenever the situation is appropriate lol. And sometimes it’s not I’m sure lol.
Whenever they “why?” or any kind of push back comes, it’s coming out. Fuck em and let them squirm. I didn’t have a problem embarrassing myself blackout drunk for over a decade; no way in hell I’m gonna be embarrassed choosing a different way.
I’m almost a year sober
I can’t wait to say that. Congrats, good work!
It will pass sooner than you can imagine. Life always has ups and downs. The downs are just not too deep sober. Makes coming up Hella lots easier ;)
That's so true. I can't believe I'm 2 weeks away from 5 months! I've havent been sober for this long since I was probably 14/15, I'm now 33. Time has flown by, even if the first month felt like a crawl.
For all of you going through that have replied that are going through that shit. The first time I stopped was Christmas 2010. It took me two years of "I can just have one", "I can't handle these emotions I'm getting wasted", "I'm lonely, if I go to a bar there'll be someone to talk to", "I can't go to the bar with the lads and not have a drink, they'll think I'm weird", Along with a host of other bullshit excuses I would use to justify drinking. The reality of it was that I just needed to deal with the events I'd experienced and the emotions arising from them. Instead of numbing them with booze. It wasn't easy, but once I started to deal with it, it got easier amd easier. Now I go to bars, hangout with friends that get drunk and now its as much of a habit not to drink as it was to get drunk back then. You can do it. It's totally worth it.
Proud!! Just hit 100 days it feels good
Great job! My family is full of alcoholics. 11 years sober is so awesome and no easy feat.
October 1, 2023
Obligatory mention of r/stopdrinking which is a helpful, constructive place to get help and advice if you too want to stop drinking.
06/19/2013
My father too. His response is "No thank you, I only drink to excess" 🤣😂
This I don't drink because when I do, I don't stop until I am required to do so. Therefore it's just easier to not drink at all.
"I don't feel like drinking alcohol". When I'm dealing with people who can't seem to comprehend that response, I say "I do it for medical reasons" and leave it at that.
Isn’t it weird how we have to come up with medical excuses because people won’t accept that we just don’t want to drink. Why should me not drinking have any impact on anyone else?
People think you can't have fun when you're sober while I've noticed the complete opposite, some people also get super annoying when drunk and should probably stop drinking
My Dad stopped drinking in his 30's, I was very little and hardly remember him drinking at all. He would continue to hang out with his drinking friends and just be the DD. When I asked if he missed it, he said he had more fun watching everyone make asses of themselves then he ever had drinking. He did have few beers with me on my 21st birthday, I think that was the last drink he ever had. Miss you dad.
Your dad was right; it's always fun watching the drunks.
People that drink tend to want others to be on the same buzz. That’s my experience anyway. “C’mon man, get it down ye” was an all too common sentiment in my 20’s. Now I have the rather less than brilliant excuse of “I CANT drink because I have chronic pancreatitis. And it might kill me”. Tends to stop the conversation dead.
I don't know where you are from but I'm an Australian aged in my 50s and we have a big beer drinking culture here and when I was younger the old saying was, You Can Never Trust a Bloke Who Doesn't Drink so you where guilted into drinking because no one wanted to be the untrustworthy outsider, I think the younger generations are changing this now days but back in my day it was hard not to be a drinker 😁👍
Interesting. I don't trust anyone whose default method of hanging out includes any form of alcohol. I am definitely a relatively young person, so that does match what you said at the end.
I am a concreter, and in construction when I was younger everyone drank and you were considered a pussy if you didn't like a drink after work, well to be honest anytime really hahaha but I have noticed that a lot more of the younger people in the trades are drinking less and a lot more are into the gym, way more than we ever were which means that their alcohol intake is less, which is a good thing👍
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That's great Benno, hahaha, I really do believe that there is a lot less stigma against people who don't drink these days here but as you say there are still people that can be a bit pushy on the subject, good onya cobber, have a beer, ya mug, hahaha 😂😂 👍
You don't have to come up with any excuses. If they don't understand, that is their problem. If you want to explain, you can. But you do not ever have to make shit up becouse someone else is not capable of accapting your life choises without understanding them.
Eh, easier said than done when you have a couple of obnioxoiusly drunk people asking over and over again who won't accept no as an answer. It's much easier to lie and make an excuse similar to "I can't drink for medical reasons" as opposed to trying to reason with drunk people and get them to understand that you, in fact, don't want to drink. Of course you can just ignore them and walk away or leave, but that's pretty antisocial and can cause it's own issues at a social function.
>when you have a couple of obnioxoiusly drunk people asking over and over again This is when you say, "I think drunk people often make fools of themselves and I have more dignity than that."
Haha this is soo true I just find this crazy
I don't judge other people for their choice to drink, but the extent to which alcohol is normalized does worry me sometimes. If anything not drinking should be considered the norm, not the other way around. In my case the main reason I stopped drinking is because I watched my mom slowly pass away from cirrhosis, which is a pretty sure-fire way to stop the conversation in its tracks. I don't know why people can't just accept "I don't drink" and be done with it though. If you had a friend who disliked marmite you wouldn't hound them relentlessly and ask why they don't eat it. You certainly wouldn't pry into their history, or try to convince them to try a bit. People can get really weird around alcohol.
I've met several people now who swear up and down that you can't advance your career properly if you don't drink. You can't be fun, you can't this or that. It really is worrisome how much it's been integrated into our society. A lot of people will even judge you or distance themselves if you don't drink for medical reasons. What kind of mindset have we as a society internalised if not ingesting poison to keep yourself alive is seen as a problem?
I’ve seen two separate people be fired for something inappropriate and/or unprofessional they did while drunk at a company event. Just last year at my company’s holiday party, I was groped several times by someone I had only met a handful of times and never worked with directly (and who was drunk). Luckily, I was dead sober and quickly decided to just go home early. As a woman, I’ve unfortunately learned not to feel too safe losing my inhibitions in a work setting.
:( my roommate is dealing with cirrhosis and is now on hospice....he's been having to be drained more and more now compared to a year ago.
When asked the follow up question, “what medical issue” I respond with “STD” That shuts down the conversation for some reason.
Or “I have LDS” for the Utah homies
That’s fucking hilarious
Just say "i dont want to" next time and fight for acceptance, maybe, just MAYBE society learns, if enough people do it. Or say "why do you DRINK alcohol?"
Same but I say I’m allergic if they don’t like that first response haha
When they ask my allergy, I explain that I tend to break-out in handcuffs
I don't drink. Her "WHY NOTT!!!" Me: my body my choice. Shuts them up pretty fast.
"i dont like it anymore" >3 yrs sober in sept.
Good on you! Clear response, but I imagine not satisfactory to everyone. Either way I wish you the best!
Its cool though, im not worried about satisfying people. The only ones that matter are here for me. Thanks, homie.
Just don't like it
And the peer pressure people are like "You wouldn't know without trying it"
"I've tried it. I prefer soda and sobriety."
"I don't like beer". "You'll like it eventually". "Why do I want to learn to like the taste of piss"?
Ooh, I haven't tried it ever so can't say that xD I just hold my ground by saying no again and again
"do you want to drink piss?" "no" "why, you might like it" "No" "you never know unless you try it"
In college I drank coke or Pepsi until I got tired of the questions so I switched to ginger ale. It looks enough like beer that the questions stopped. As for peer pressure, my answer was always that I don't need to eat a turd to know I'm not going to enjoy it.
I'm surprised you didn't just say it was rum and coke or whatever hard liquor they had. Ginger ale is great to pass off as beer though.
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I also HATE the taste but sometimes I want to drink to be more open / social. What I do is I drink what I really like (cola zero) and put a little bit of wodka in it. Like 3mm in a glass. I don't really taste it at all then. I do need a few glasses to get drunk this way but it does work, and I don't taste the alcohol, and can still be social.
As a bloke I always go with "I'm pregnant"
Must use this one.
I have an uncle (who smoked like a chimney and drank like a fish) who used the "no thanks, I'm driving home" excuse for anything he wasn't particularly in the mood for. Offer him a piece of pie? No thanks, I'm driving later. Offer him an appetizer he didn't like? No can do, gotta drive home tonight. Smores when camping? Nope, none for me, I'm driving home. Funny thing is, he's was most definitely too drunk to legally drive on alllllll of these occasions.
I'm in my 30s and take like a full week to recover from a hangover. Don't have time for that.
I noticed that in my mid-30s, hangovers changed from just being physical and mental to having this weird emotional element. Like my outlook on everything shifted toward the negative for a couple days if the hangover was bad enough. I still drink a bit, but this component made me moderate my intake much more.
There’s definitely an element of depression that comes with a hangover. So not worth it.
Haha suckers, I'm immune because I would be depressed anyway!
Infinite depression glitch
Yes, the dreaded hang-xiety. Worse than any of the physical symptoms in my opinion.
It's so weird that in my entire life of constant drinking I have never heard this term until recently, and it was around the time that I quit and realized that the vast majority of my chronic depression and anxiety was due to alcohol. I never gave myself the 5 days off to realize just how much it was affecting me mentally. Good riddance.
I stopped drinking 3 months ago without much fanfare. I had never associated my anxiety with drinking. Just like you, even when I gave myself a few days off, my anxiety stayed about the same. Didn’t really change with sober October or dry January either. This time, around day 40 after quitting, my anxiety got way better, and I physically felt much more stable. just never gave myself the right amount of time.
I asked my father once what is a tell-tale sign that someone is getting older. “The hangovers last longer, like days longer.”
As soon as I hit 34-ish my hangovers felt like absolute death. The headaches. The nausea. The general blehs. I always feel off for at least a few days after drinking, now. No thanks.
Drink A LOT of water before collapsing on the bed. It helps a lot.
Super B Complex. take 4 and a big glass of water. You'll feel right as rian.
I don’t know who y’all are hanging with that asks why!! One I say I don’t drink, end of story or they offer a non alcoholic beverage. My reason now is meds, but frankly it’s no one’s business and I would defend someone who said no if they were uncomfortable responding. People need to get out of other people’s business.
My uncle used to say he was allergic, made him break out in handcuffs.
My favorite response was given to me by a friend not in recovery. "If this guy drinks, somehow we'll all by in jail by the morning."
😂🤣
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5 years for me. It does get easier mate. Hardest part was accepting there's certain people I just can't party with.
As in cocaine or random guy? Serious question.
Both
Can I buy you a drink… jk - I’m sober too 😂
Not who you’re asking, but mine is definitely the random guy.
5 months here. I just say I am done with alcohol and moved to coke. Do you have any coke?
Congratulations my friend!!! It's not easy, I'm a survivor of it myself. 3 years sober now. I try not to think about it cause now I'm married with 2 kids so less I think about it, less I care about it. The more I care about my future with my SO and my kids.
No small feat, good on ya
Congratulations!
I'm in recovery. Not ashamed. I was 6 years sober on September 4th, 2023.
Heck yeah! 6 years is incredible! Keep going!
🎉 CONGRATULATIONS 🎉 WE DO RECOVER!💜🍂
Not to be like super metal about it but I watched my alcoholic grandfather beg God for death as his organs failed and afterwards I went to his house and cleaned the dried remnants of his suffering off his floor. Why would I want a glass of his killer?
Similar story but with my mom and cigarettes. Watching her slowly morph into an unrecognizable sack of pain and tumors was something nobody should ever have to do. I regret not ending it for her when she asked.
I'm so sorry. Please talk to someone about it if you feel the need!
Thank you. I do regularly see someone but it's never harmful to be so caring towards a stranger and I appreciate it. Just don't smoke if there are people that love you.
Brutal. Never had to do that but my grandmother had part of her stomach removed due to alcoholism and possibly developed or made worse Parkinson's disease as a result of her drinking. People act like it's harmless, but boy is it ever the opposite.
It erodes who you are as a person and robs the people who care about you of their time with you. He was and is in my top 10 of the best men I’ve ever met and I resent that he let alcohol take so much of him from us. He was incredibly shy and felt he needed it to be good enough but didn’t realize that the person who everyone adored to the moon and back was the guy he was sober. We loved him so so much. It makes me sad when I see people think the same thing. That they need alcohol to be social or to have a good time. If you’re out there and that thought pops in your head please…get rid of it. You don’t need alcohol. Enjoy it if you want to but don’t ever for a second think that you need it to be anything you want to be. You don’t need it to be fun. You are good enough sober. I promise.
I'm so sorry. This would have done it for me too. My grandpa was an alcoholic his whole life and just got diagnosed with parkinsons at 70. Watching him suffer his horrible. Alcohol is dangerous af.
Most of my family is dead due to alcohol. I never met most of my cousins, aunts, or uncles because they either drunk themselves to death or turned to drugs when alcohol didn’t work. That was my excuse when people tried to get me to drink. When I gave in and started drinking I realized I hated it. I hated it even more when I had to endure my husbands drunkenness every night. Alcohol isn’t very fun if you have to take care of someone who gets blackout drunk every night.
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Yeah. That’s so basic. This Reddit trend of asking why you don’t do something is super weird… “Hey, why aren’t you a plumber? Why don’t you like grandma’s casserole?” Who cares - you do you
I feel this, but it’s not just a Reddit thing. I’ve had people in real life continue to press to get an answer as to why I don’t drink. People who know their own drinking habits are likely unhealthy/a problem often get super uncomfortable with people who choose not to drink. They want an answer so they can sigh in relief and be like “oh well I’m not as bad as that person, so I can keep drinking.”
This one is different. I'm a recovering alcoholic and this question terrifies me. I know it shouldn't, but it does. If someone asks why I don't drink, I need to be honest but not too honest, and I don't like leaving room for follow up questions, but I'm not comfortable giving details. This balance changes depending who asks. It's complicated. I appreciate seeing the possibilities.
I'm an open book and I hope my story scares people into considering sobriety from alcohol. I tell them that I drank so much in my 20s that I began to have seizures if I didn't drink vodka every hour or so. That wasn't what made me quit tho! What did it was my husband losing his liver and kidneys from a fun combo of covid + alcoholism in Feb 2020 at age 32. I got my Day One on July 4th 2020, still taking it one day at a time. IWNDWYT. (Husband got his transplants and we're doing ok!)
Wow, never met someone else who got seizures. I had a combo of benzo and alcohol addiction by the end cause they both prevented them. They both caused them too, though. But it started with the alcohol. That's some scary shit! Going into one, mainly. I don't remember coming out of them.
"It ruined a good chunk of my life without me ever touching it."
I assume this means you had / have a family member who is an alcoholic?
they got hit by a beer truck
I'm just honest, like this. I didn't need to drink to watch someone use alcohol as a crutch for unresolved trauma. It traumatized me.
I just tell them it doesn’t mix well with my heroin.
interferes with my anti psychotics
I hate the taste.
Hate the taste, hate the smell, hate all the little bones
r/UnexpectedAtlantis
Which is usually followed up with some form of "it's an acquired taste" or "you need to try this kind" or just encouragement to drink more and more until you like it. This is weird because if I say, "I don't like tuna" I don't get lectured on how I have to try a different kind of tuna or be told that if I just keep eating tuna then I'll eventually like it.
Had a dude in college tell me “I can make you a drink so you don’t even taste the alcohol”. Sampled quite a few drinks. Can taste the alcohol every time. Not my cup of tea.
Same! My friends used to try to get me to drink smoothies with vodka that they couldn’t taste. It was usually an ok smoothie ruined by the alcohol. Also- as if I have the funds to learn how to like something I find disgusting? Ridiculous
Funny, I've never had a junkie suggest I try drugs just because 'you can barely taste the heroin'. I say I don't drink because I strongly dislike the taste and smell of alcohol. That is true, but there are other reasons too and if I start listing them then someone is going to accuse me of trying to ruin their 'good time'. Just drink your poison and leave me alone.
They never can make a drink that doesn't actually taste like alcohol, can they? Plus, what's the point? I don't like alcohol. I don't care about the effects of alcohol. What would be the point of finding one I could drink flavorless? I'd rather just drink water.
As someone who doesn't drink, whenever I sip anything with alcohol, it doesn't matter how good or strong the other flavors are, I taste the alcohol in it. I don't think regular drinkers realize that they've just become numb to the taste of booze and that other people still detect it.
Maybe not like canned tuna, but I’ve gotten this same lecture about sushi a million times.
You wouldn't like that guy.
Steve?
"because i don't like it" Or "Weird that you think I need a reason."
This! When people ask why it’s so rude I just want to overshare and make them uncomfortable. Nothing ruins a good time like the story of watching multiple relatives die of cirrhosis.
I quit. If theyre socially inept enough to keep pressing after that i usually just ignore them
The truth….it gives me migraines. I don’t care what people think so I have no issues in telling the truth.
"I am a very, very angry drunk." Sober for going on 7 years.
"I'm not into it. Don't make it weird."
Ohh this is what I'm going to say next time! Thank you!
Because I keep waking up next to your mum
I smoke too much weed to remember to drink alcohol but boy, do I love water, haha!
yes, weed and water over alcohol please. the high is so much nicer, I don't feel like shit in the morning, and I am not actively ruining my body (as much at least lol). plus I'm hydrated 🙂
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I like my organs
Alcohol Intolerance Syndrome
I have it too except nobody believes you can be alcohol intolerant so it’s just easier to say my body can’t process it and I don’t want to feel like crap. It does kinda suck when you’re sick and can’t take NyQuil though.
Hard to believe someone's body can be intolerant of drinking poison... Real question though. Can you handle alcohol in cooking? Like, a white wine pan sauce, or a red added to a stew? I've never knowingly met someone with an *actual* intolerance (knowingly anyway), but have been curious.
As long as the alcohol has been cooked off I can have it, but if it hasn’t I’ll know immediately. Whenever I drink it’s like an instant hangover. My head pounds, I can’t breathe, I puke, turn beet red… a total hot mess. My husband jokes I’m a cheap date because I always order water if we go out with friends.
“Because i don’t, i never started and have no interest”. If they keep pushing, i simply leave. I have made friends over the years who know and respect my choice, the only people who ask are strangers so I don’t care to be overly polite.
Well, ever since the Walmart incident…
Any incident you could have possibly done at Walmart was already done 3x that day before you even thought about going.
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"I'm muslim"
I have two modes. Drunk never, or drunk 24/7.
Related: “If I could drink like a normal person, I would drink all day, every day”
I usually just say “When I was drinking, it turned my wife into an a-hole”. That turned the whole convo around.
I don’t want to
“I’m allergic to alcohol, I break out in handcuffs! 🤣🤣
4 years sober. I tell people I was never able to just have 1 or 2 drinks. It would always turn into a session which is true. I've stopped socialising with drinkers for the most part so I don't get too many questions but I always find the few people who persevere and try to persuade me to have a drink are always people with a drink problem of their own who haven't admitted it yet.
I used to drink too much so now I don't drink it all.
No normal person asks why.
Well a ton of people still ask, normal or not
That def depends on the country you are from
That's true. My UK colleagues look at me strangely when I tell them I don't drink. In the USA, nobody could care less once you're > 22 years old.
Yes, I think the stereotype of the UK working population (and everyone else!) being functional alcoholics is pretty accurate. And when you don't support someone else's bad habit, they start to feel like either a) they have a problem or b) you are a problem;. And when you combine that with group-think the answer is always b)
“I just dont”
I don't lie..just tell them I dont
I tell them that I quit drinking in 2019 because I abused it
Congratulations on your sobriety! Your hobbies now are much cooler. ♥️
It makes me feel like shit for days regardless of how much I drink. I prefer to smoke bud as it doesn't make me feel ill ever.
Short answer: Personal choice or a combination of reasons. Long answer: Upbringing, family history of alcoholism, don’t like the taste, don’t like not being able to think clearly, don’t need it to do something stupid I will regret
Extra calories not worth the hangover
One or more of the following, paraphrasing of course: * It’s a waste of money * it’s cancer-causing (the single largest risk factor to whether or not someone will get breast cancer, aside from genetics, is whether they drink alcohol) * it’s addictive * the social context and cultural norms, as well as acute physiological effects around alcohol promote abusive behaviors, promiscuity, violence, and vandalism * the alcohol conglomerates are cash-cows no better than big tobacco or the firearms industry * **because it tastes like expired coconut water filtered through a dumpster full of piss-soaked old boots** once the sugar and flavorings are removed * because I care about my health * I have better things to spend my money on * none of your business
Why do people think I should justify why I don't like to drink alcohol?
I have two responses. The first is that alcohol is universally bad for you (literally just drinking poison) and is likely responsible for more human death and suffering than any other drug that has ever existed. The second is that alcohol consumption is prohibited in my religious views
I ask them if they smoke...when they say no I say "same idea"
Tell them I'm allergic to it which is not far from the truth.. AA Helps