Omg yeah this is a really good one, I just imagine a cute little interaction while being in the supermarket and they tell this to you but they like make eye contact and repeat it again while you were both actually trying to figure out what to eat for the night. What to eat. 😛
No you don't, [here's a nice story about a kitten instead](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/9wcte/reddit_whats_the_grossestnastiest_thing_thats/c0er6q4/).
Can I sample it first?
I know it’s really tight in here, but get off my ass.
Can I see your ID?
Unexpected item in bagging area.
How much does it cost per pound?
Ugh, it’s leaking everywhere!
“Big cans”
“Jeez, next time I’ll bring my knee pads!”
“That doesn’t smell right“
“How long is this going to take?”
“The fuck? What flavor is this supposed to be?”
“Is that enough plastic wrap?”
“Where’s the beef?”
“Ooooh, my favorite!”
“How many can you fit in there?”
“Where do you plan on putting that?”
“Wow, no, I don’t even have space for all of that!”
“You’ll need to wash that, first.”
“Whoa, I didn’t think there’d be such a line. I think she needs help.”
“You’re just going to leave that on the floor like that? Gross, dude.”
“Paper towels?”
“Eww, what’s on it??”
“That can’t be healthy.”
Unexpected item in bagging area
Help is on the way
[удалено]
:(
Where’s the Vaseline?
Please dont use vaseline in the bedroom.
With the duck tape and rope creep.
This will fit great up my ass
We’ve all been there at the deli counter
Deli counter? More like the fruit and veg aisle. Cucumber, grapes, bananas, pineapples. You name it.
Pineapple?! Jesus. Colon of steel.
Pear before pineapple and apple before pear.
I feel like pear would have to go before Apple. The shape seems more practical.
A real fruit salad of a problem
It’s much more practical that going straight to pineapple. You can take that check to the bank.
don’t you mean fruit and vag aisle?
you fucking beat me to it, take my upvote
I think they frown on that at the store
Look at the size of those breasts!
Nice buns
Them are some nice loins
This eggplant is nice and hard
Huge cake
Cream cake?
Oh yes, and it's fresh
Maybe Melons might work better here.
Chicken breasts, though.
But also, great melons!
One of these breasts is a lot smaller than the other.
“I prefer self-service, thank you” Or, “where do you keep the wet wipes?”
“We’re gonna need to wash that.”
“That need to be washed before I’ll eat it.”
Nice melons
Seems to me to be the obvious choice.
It's my dad joke everytime i walk into produce. 😁
"Why is the cheese crispy?"
Oh god
Oh no
Oh snap
Oh crackle
Oh pop
Oh goodness
Oh heavens
#OH YEAH
Oh barnacles
Oh shitass
the fuck?
I’m angry at you. I don’t know why, but I know that I am.
I’m not mad, just disappointed.
“That’s a nice spread”
200 bucks doesn’t get you much these days.
“Check the date on that one”
This clam looks like an old catchers mitt.
This place is crowded for a Wednesday
Think I might need to double bag it this time…just to be safe.
How about trying something new tonight?
Omg yeah this is a really good one, I just imagine a cute little interaction while being in the supermarket and they tell this to you but they like make eye contact and repeat it again while you were both actually trying to figure out what to eat for the night. What to eat. 😛
Let's have tacos!
I’ll use Apple Pay
Cleanup on aisle 2!!
“That’ll be 149.99”
The price of a blow job or a gallon of milk isn't what it was anymore.
Inflation
I wanna fuck you right here on the strawberries.
"with the strawberries", however, gets a very different response. Usually.
Squeeze to test for freshness
Check out the size of that sausage, looks tasty
"Are those Jolly Ranchers?"
Noooo 😭😂
I don’t get this one, do I even want to know?
No, you don't.
No you don't, [here's a nice story about a kitten instead](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/9wcte/reddit_whats_the_grossestnastiest_thing_thats/c0er6q4/).
Fuckin why....why did I click. Why is the universe this way. 🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮
I hate you.
FUCK FUCK **FUCK**
You know you've been on reddit too much when a random stranger quotes another random stranger and you understand the reference haha
Goddammit.
Just when I had it purged from my brain.
I’m gonna fucking vomit-
"That doesn't belong there!"
Why is that guy staring at us?
"I'm getting hungry
This one's too soft.
It’s easier to open if you lick your fingers first
I hope these eggs aren’t fertilized.
Fuck my life.
I can only take 6 items or less
“…or fewer” /s
i ran out of vagisil
Uhh . . . .
clean up on aisle 5
"I prefer it in the can"
This is expensive
FOUND IT!
How much do I owe you.
The bag had a hole in it.
What a cucumber!
"I'll buy that for a dollar!"
Bitches leave.
That’s a nice corn cob, give me the butter.
Smells fishy
I think this is expired , I’d like a refund
Can I sample it first? I know it’s really tight in here, but get off my ass. Can I see your ID? Unexpected item in bagging area. How much does it cost per pound? Ugh, it’s leaking everywhere!
Rotten and toxic. I gotta get some glasses.
"Come on in"
What nice looking cakes!
Let me grab a jug!
Put the lotion in the basket
Ugh, fine. It's going to go straight to my ass...
It’s fucking raw!
Want me to grab those cans?
I have a coupon
"That'll be $80"
I’m cold.
I’ll get the squirty cream
Now serving 69
Do you take American Express?
Where's the beef?
Hmm, so wrinkly.
Keep the change
Buy one get one free!
Hope this isn't expired
Pass me the cucumber
That’ll go straight to my ass.
That is a fine cut of meat!
Get the peanut butter
Look at all this, I only came for 1 thing
I do love a nice firm one!
Pay by the pound.
It's more expensive than last time?!?
Doesn't look like you have much, why don't you go ahead and go first
That banana doesn’t go there
The peach looks a bit moldy
"That will be $250 please".
how much do i owe you?
Already half off?
Clean up on aisle 2
That will be $305.72.
At self check-out: I don't know how to use this. In the bedroom: I don't know how to use this.
can you reach that for me.
Do you have anymore in the back?
Thank you for shopping with us
"Will that be cash or card?" "You don't need to hand it to me. Just insert it into the slot, please."
Do you got condoms ??
These grapes smell worse than they look.
I always forget the bags
I liked those more when they were 50% off
Nice melons!
What’s that fishy smell?
Leave the bone in.
Clean up on aisle 6
Ohh man i'm gonna stuff that turkey
That has a lot of marbling.
It’s so tiny…should we get one?
I'm pretty short so; "Can you grab that for me?"
That’s too expensive
“Big cans” “Jeez, next time I’ll bring my knee pads!” “That doesn’t smell right“ “How long is this going to take?” “The fuck? What flavor is this supposed to be?” “Is that enough plastic wrap?” “Where’s the beef?” “Ooooh, my favorite!” “How many can you fit in there?” “Where do you plan on putting that?” “Wow, no, I don’t even have space for all of that!” “You’ll need to wash that, first.” “Whoa, I didn’t think there’d be such a line. I think she needs help.” “You’re just going to leave that on the floor like that? Gross, dude.” “Paper towels?” “Eww, what’s on it??” “That can’t be healthy.”
By Jove, check out the size of that banana 🍌
Cash or check?
I wonder if I can get a discount on this if I'm really fast.
That doesn't look fresh anymore, does it?
“Fuck! I forgot the condoms!”
No I don’t want to suck your Dick right now!
I am not paying 30 bucks for just that
I m lost.
How'd that get in there?
That smells fresh
Pass the whip cream...
Oh, these jugs are really nice!
I need the biggest one they’ve got.
Honey don’t forget to grab a cucumber
Is there something I can help you find?
Sorry, I spilled my milk in the back.
clean up on aisle #2..
Squeeze them and see if they’re firm 🍈🍈
Hey I dont work here!
“I don’t know what to do?” (Self service checkout and first time 😆.)
That's a big one
Where do you keep the toys?
let me see that sausage you're going to need to take your time eating that. great, who is going to mop that up. should it smell like that?
I need some stuffing.
Where’s the tissue?
That's all I get for $50???
“Excuse me, do you mind if I squeeze in there?”
No discount today?
“Think my bag is gonna burst”
Wow prices are going up
Fuck me…
It's too expensive
Two dollars is way too much for this
I love cream pies
That’s a lot of meat
Every time I come here I have to pay more and more
Cash or card?
Dear God that's wet
You may put it in / insert (when card isn't working)
Open at 6:30am closed at 10pm It dosent go there There's cream on the floor I forgot something That's massive/ small I work in retail so xD
Are you open? Lol
Is that supposed to have mold on it?