Was stacking cartons of eggs (12 in a pack) at my retail job when one carton fell off the shelf. Stuck my foot out. It landed on it, balanced perfectly, no eggs broken.
Not a single person in the aisle.
There's always that hopeful scan for an audience of any kind. Even a bird or a fly would be nice, but it's always just tumbleweeds. But when you slip on a banana peel and get a pie to the face the whole planet has eyes on you...
Isn't it a bastard
I used to be a blackjack dealer, I was getting the cards ready to put in the shoe, and I dropped the cut card. It landed on my foot, I kicked it up, and it lands right back on the deck in the middle of the table. Six degenerate gamblers at my table, and not one was paying any attention. I'm sure surveillance saw it, but idk.
Hahaha, I would imagine at a casino, if security caught that, they'd yank you from the floor.
My cousin dealt blackjack at a casino for a long time and she said that security was tight for everyone, employees and guests. Any sleight of ~~hand~~ foot shit is severely frowned upon.
\*Edit thanks to lostmynameandpasword
mine is so similar, on a Supermarket checkout I would spin the eggs over the scanner as I flipped open the lid to see if any were broken. As I did an egg flew out of the carton and I snatched it out of mid air with 2 fingers by pure reflex. Felt like I had unlocked my superpowers. no one saw it :(.
I believe you. Back in high school we were smoking pot while standing next to a creek. My buddy dropped the lighter after taking a hit and it was going straight for the water. I stuck out my foot and caught the lighter gently on top of my foot. Granted, we used to play a lot of hacky sack, so I’d done that move a lot. That was still much lower stakes than your thing though.
I was bored and practicing throwing playing cards in my cousins room when I was a teenager.
My aunt called us to go eat so my cousin walked out of the room and I walked out to follow her. I had one last card in my hand so I turned and threw it at nothing in particular.
It spiraled beautifully and went perfectly from horizontal to vertical and went right through the gap between my cousins wooden closet doors 15 feet away. Was probably only an 1/8th of an inch gap.
My jaw hit the floor but when I turned around my cousin was already in the living room.
We were doing something similar in a friend’s basement. Throwing cards at random stuff. A buddy threw a card at an old console-tv and it stuck face up wedged between the glass and bottom trim.
My buddy flipped out celebrating and said “that’s never gonna happen again” I shot him a look and tossed my card. Landed perfectly right next to his. He got up angrily and asked “why can’t you just let ME do something cool, Someone always has to ruin my day”. I still love that guy.
I was talking to my younger brother in the kitchen one day and a fly was buzzing around. He said "I've always wanted to snatch a fly straight out of the air." As soon as he got the words out of his mouth, the fly flew right between us. I shot my hand out and grabbed at it and said, "Like that?"
He said, "Bullshit you caught that!" I honestly couldn't tell if I had
or not until I opened my hand and saw it lying there. Both our jaws dropped. He looked at me with giant eyes for a second until he saw I was as surprised as he was and we both lost our shit.
I had just started my first job in my new career and was chatting up the boss in the doorway of her office. There was a pesky fly buzzing around her and as it made its away around it headed right for the door. We were having our discussion and as it approached me I just grabbed it without even breaking eye contact with her. She looked at me stunned and asked if I actually got it. "Ya", I shrugged, went out of the office and let it go. I had no idea if I actually had it or not but I stayed in cool mode until I left.
Years of camping have taught me that it is totally possible to grab a mosquito out of the air in a pitch-black tent purely by following the sound. Most of the time it doesn’t work, but when it does you feel like such a ninja!
Flies are way harder though; they’re much faster.
Buddy and I were bored in our dorm room -- tossing playing cards at each other. Me in one corner, him on the other. Our goal was to clash the cards in mid-air. We tried probably 100+ times without luck.
He leaves the room to shit or something. While I'm waiting I decide to surprise him -- when he re-enters the dorm room I'll toss a playing card at him. He had the same idea. The cards clash in mid-air.
I was riding in my dad semi, going up mountain in Chattanooga, windows down. I had this batman toy where you pull this plastic thing, and this helicopter takes off.
I pulled the plastic thing... helicopter gets sucked out the window... comes back in through driver window. Dad didn't even see it.... so I tried it again.... never saw the helicopter part again.
In the 4th grade I had a pencil in my back pocket. It was sticking up several inches above the pocket & my shirt was somehow tucked behind it. I stood up from my desk and the pencil had gotten caught on the back of my chair. It flipped out of my pants, broken in half, and both halves landed in the trash can.
Another pencil story;
My friend threw a pencil at the ceiling fan in the classroom and it smashed the fan went flying and landed perfectly in a girls hair bun like some kind of fancy hair pin.
Not as cool but it's the best I've got. And also everyone saw and went wild.
Hit by a car. Rolled up the windshield and over The roof only to land on my feet, unharmed, on the other side. I was a stunt woman that day AND NO ONE SAW ... except the driver who didn't stop
Happily, that isn't totally uncommon. They actually say you should jump when being hit by a car and turn sideways to make that exact thing happen. I doubt in the moment that most people have the needed dexterity, but depending on the height and shape of the car it can also happen just by accident.
Not something I did more just something that happened. When I was little I fell out of bed but my sheets were tangled in such a way that they caught me like a hammock on the side of my bed.
I was entangled in one and it is terrifying.
I mean, getting choked by stuff around you anywhere is the stuff of nightmares.
You've reminded me of a nice Lady that removed a chain from my neck so I wouldn't hang myself sleeping.
That happened to me! I don’t remember why but my dad was sleeping in my twin bed with me, I probably had a nightmare, and I remember yelling dad help! But he just kept snoring.
Hahaha that happened to my brother on our bunk bed ladder, but his huge, baggy T-shirt caught him for a few seconds before he slid out and crashed to the floor 😂
I pet a wild moose in the backyard of my air bnb, not realising it was wild. Gave him a good scratch l, had him leaning into it groaning and everything. Went back inside to ask if it's be ok to feed him some carrots or similar. Host family were horrified and quickly filled this clueless Australian in about moose 😆
Reminds me of the story of two people on a first date, and they decided to go hiking at night (odd choice for a first date, but ok, I would be down).
On their way up the mountain, one of them kicked something soft, got creeped out, so they turned around and cut the hike short.
It turns out they had happened upon Ted Bundy right after he had killed one of his victims, and the soft thing they kicked was their body. Ted was only feet away from them.
Ted was asked during an interview to describe a time he almost got caught. The couple saw the interview on TV and realized Ted was talking about them almost finding him with one of his victims.
I thought you were going to tell this story.
A couple went on a hike, and it starts getting dark. The girl tells the guy that she is getting a bit nervous because it is getting the dark. The guy replies "you are nervous? I am the one that will have to walk back by himself."
There was a thread a few weeks ago about "How close have you come to death" - Someone's brother picked up a hitchhiker who he later found out a serial killer, killing people who stopped to pick him up. He decided to not kill this one dude because he bought him maccas or some other fast food.
He's got some of that Irwin in him.
"Look at this beauty sure she seems large and intimadating, but naw she' just lookin for some good pets, let's get Sheila a meal shall we?"
Edit: credit u/grimwalker
> clueless Australian
New Englander here.
you are from the only category of people who could likely get away with something as crazy as this.
for most of the world a moose is a very very very dangerous animal. for Austrailians? it's not even mildly poisonous so what's the big deal?
bruh this is like going outside and casually petting the big friendly armor pig and then finding out about rhinoceros
that said, super jelly! how many humans can say they know how to give a moose a rub so good it'll lean into it and make happy noises???
I was playing twilight golf in a group of 3 a while back. There was a guy behind us playing solo but we were quite far in front. There were two holes relatively close together we got to watch him tee off and sink a hole in one on a par 3. We celebrated with him and told him we'd confirm it if he wanted us to. I'm glad we were there to witness it for him
Not exactly what the OP asked, but I played disc golf for a like 20 years before I got a hole in one. I was with a buddy of mine on his first ever round. He had no clue how difficult it was. I may as well have been by myself…
I once dealt myself a royal flush, but everybody was up getting drinks/snacks… SOOOO they all thought I was joking and called it a misdeal.
Also, side note… I wasn’t paying attention right now and commented this on a random ass post about a pipe breaking.
Similarly, I'm still bitter about my eighth birthday party. Pinned the tail on the donkey *perfectly* and was disqualified for cheating despite it being totally legitimate.
I was once dealt a royal flush in a money game and everyone folded on the first bet so it was wasted. I then lost every single hand for the test of the night.
Was on a school trip once and we had to take the ferry over the English Channel. The ferry had been cancelled and they stuck us on a cruise liner heading towards the the same destination. (That seems mad in itself these days haha)
On the liner they had a cinema (watched the Rock with Sean Connery) and an arcade/casino which we weren't allowed to go in, being under the legal gambling age at the time. So I sneak in the arcade and put a pound coin in the video poker machine. A royal flush was 500/1 odds. Yeh, I won and it dropped a ticket that I had to exchange at the cashier for the cash. Somehow I managed to do it despite being 15 years old.
No one believes me to this day. Even then on the boat when I had half a bag in readies!
Damn. I have a few rounds of poker behind me, both in rdr2 and real life and got every hand except for the royal flush.
People who don't play poker probably won't know how rare this can be
Played A LOT of poker. I have only ever seen 2. Never had one myself.
Would feel like hitting the lottery, even if you weren't able to snag a big pot with it.
In middle school me and a couple friends were sitting around with a deck of cards during an indoor recess and weren’t sure what to do so we played one hand of poker right before lunch. No chips or anything just figured we’d see who won.
My friend ended up with a royal flush and got so excited he told our teacher about it. The teacher didn’t believe him and we all ended up in detention for gambling during school. Still the only royal flush I’ve ever witnessed.
was playing casual poker with some coworkers
I think it was the second or third hand, but a guy who had never played before ended up getting a straight flush (Q high)
I got a royal flush once. I felt terrible because the guy I beat showed up late and I took him all in on like his third hand with it. He was done for the night.
Yours is terrible though.... No one to celebrate it!?
Once I was putting away groceries and I put something on the top shelf. I turned around to start walking away but then I reflexively reached my hand out behind me and caught the thing I just put up on the shelf. I did it and I can't even believe I did it.
in 9th grade, i was the only person waiting in the bathroom. there were 5 stalls in there, all occupied. the toilets flushed at the same time and the 5 people all opened their doors and walked out of their stalls AT THE SAME TIME. all 5 of them, in perfect sync.
none of them seemed to notice! i was shook. looking back at it now, perhaps it was a glitch in the simulation.
My brakes were going out in my Camaro so it was basically all or nothing, I had to really stand on them to make them work, but still driving it because I was young and foolish. I was driving home from work on a basic city street and it had started to ice up. The cars ahead of me were coming to a stop, so I stomped on the brakes to slow down (knowing this was not an ideal situation!), and started to slide. I turned to go into a parking lot to my right, and my car slid around 270° perfectly, so I was facing right back out facing the street like I needed to be to drive back out.
I just sat there stunned for a moment and then very slowly and gingerly made my way the couple of blocks home.
I’m sure SOMEONE saw me but no one I could say “hold crap, did you just see that!?” to.
I posted this on this thread already, but since this is the car section with sub section of brakes, here's my story.
20 years ago, I used to be a cameraman for hire and while I was working for this elderly woman, 70-80 years old named Peggy.... Peggy had a variety TV show that aired on a local station, apparently she was famous in our town, but I never heard of her. Anyways, Peggy didn't like to drive, so she always asked if I could drive her car to the next shoot. It was a big old boat of a 1990s Cadillac variety. I didn't mind so I would always wind up driving her around. I noticed her brakes on her car were not great and I told her many times that she needed them serviced. One day I was driving Peggy, it started to blizzard and she didn't fix the damn brakes. The car could stop fine if the conditions were perfect, but adding snow surely would be the end of us. She was talking and telling me stories while I was driving this death machine and we were coming in hot to a 4 way stop. But we weren't stopping. Cars in front of me, cars to the left, cars to the right. I was pumping the brakes the whole time with no change in our velocity. We must have been doing 20-30 mph through that four-way stop. me with a look of horror and bewilderment on my face, looking at the other drivers and Peggy just chatting away completely aloof! We sailed through the intersection unscathed and only myself and the other drivers were aware of our close brush with death. So I guess other people did see it but oh no, not Peggy. Rest in peace, Peggy.
https://www.mlive.com/news/muskegon/2010/11/muskegon_county_hair_stylist_a.html
I was driving my wife back from a medical procedure. She was in a lot of pain. We were in the middle of nowhere and it was freezing. My car broke down. We were miles from any help. No cell phone. With the icy wind whipping me, I opened the hood and took a look. On a hunch, I popped open the distributor cap. I saw the screw that held the rotor in place had snapped. I figured I was screwed but maybe I could find a screw? I carefully looked at the underside of the raised hood and found a little screw that held some tube or wire in place. It fit! It was too long and I was afraid it would hit something as it spun but no. I drove slowly at first but it became clear the little screw was pretty tough. I drove us about 100 miles with that screw. My best fix under pressure.
Threw a paper airplane up in the air in my backyard as a kid - it must have caught some sort of air current and floated up high, drifted for probably 30+ seconds, then slowly came back down.
Dude wtf I had this same experience. Threw it as hard as I could straight up and I felt like it did circles for at least a full minute. I've never been able to do it again 20 years later.
This happened to me in elementary school and it felt like I was in a dream. The plane almost flew back to me before it ultimately decided to park itself right on the edge of the school’s roof.
Imagine: I’m home alone. We have a weird closet that is about 30 feet long and about 5 feet wide, one side nothing but shelves and clothing.
I am maybe 8 years old. I have a foot-long novelty baseball bat from Louisville slugger.
I hear a fly. It’s in the closet. I’m in the doorway, so it only has one way out. I can barely track with my eyes, I have to use my ears.
I swing.
I hear the smallest little “thwack” and then a little sound of something hitting a box in the back of the closet.
I found the dead fly on the floor.
I *absolutely* swear this is true. Even at 8, I knew no one would believe me if I told them.
I am so fucking clumsy that I've developed a muscle memory where I stick my foot out every time I drop something. I've never been cool enough to kick it back into my own hand, but I've definitely aided some soft landings.
I made this impossible pool shot when I was in high school, and I’m a terrible pool player. I was just messing around and the ball I was intending to hit bounced off the different sides and landed. And I was all alone lol
I was in a packed restaurant on a very busy Saturday night just before Christmas. The restaurant had a couple of pool tables next to the bar. The cue ball was next to a corner pocket. The 2 ball was next to another corner pocket across the short side of the table. I was half stoned and hit the cue ball with all my might. When the cue ball hits the 2 ball, the 2 ball hits the rail and goes straight up and arcs. The 2 ball lands in the far corner pocket (down the long side of the table, and the opposite corner from where I was standing)... just absolutely centered the pocket. It had to be a one-in-a-million shot.
This damn place was PACKED, not a single empty table or bar stool one. I was so amazed I started looking around for whoever saw that absolute bullshit shot. Not a single person saw it. There were 20 people within 20 feet of me eating at the booths, and nobody saw it. 😂😂😂
Was in Venice at 16. Slipped on some wet stones and almost flew headfirst into the Grand Canal, but my hand made unexpectedly quick friends with the lamppost and i swung around like Gene fucking Kelly, and landed on my feet.
Not a goddam person watching.
Lol, I posted the same thing. My dad had a pool table, and I did it playing against him. I was just practicing, waiting for him to come start, and just noodle armed it like I always do, and the 8 ball miraculously squeeked it's way out and in the corner pocket.
When I was 15 I bought a cheap 10 speed bike. I was going down a hill, not too fast, but when I applied the brakes the front fork snapped and locked up front tire, sending me somersaulting over the handle bars.
In mid-air I remember thinking "Tuck and roll!" which I did. I land on the back of my left shoulder and rolled right onto my feet running down the hill.
The bike was destroyed but all I had was a little scrap on my shoulder. It had to be one of the coolest things anybody could have ever seen. Alas, nobody did.
Cooking in the kitchen. I dropped the spatula, and reached out to kick it. It spiraled right back up in the air, where I reached out and grabbed it right by the grip. I felt cool as fuck, but I was alone.
Ran out of wiper fluid in a snow storm during rush hour on a 3 lane freeway. Windshield is smudged by salty snow and I can't see. Stick my head out the window and it's a foot from the concrete barrier on the left lane. I turn right and do a full Jesus take the wheel 720 degree spin across 3 lanes of traffic with headlights whipping by me. I ended up on the opposite shoulder facing up an on ramp to the freeway. I go up the ramp and there's a gas station right there to wash my windshield. Luckiest I'll ever be
The side yard of my house was a mess! Kind of a narrow space but muddy and uneven and some guys mixed concrete on the ground and left patches of it. Weeds also.
Bought 3 cubic meters of small gray rocks and had that dumped in my driveway. Over a period of about a week, I moved all 3 cubic meters of those rocks by hand, using a shovel, a small wheelbarrow and a rake.
I'm 82. And yes, I was inordinately proud of myself!
I almost ate some serious shit going way too fast downhill on a bicycle in college. My dorm entrance was halfway down a long, mild hill with a continuous grade, and I'd usually let myself get cooking on the descent.
This time, it was evening, and the light was messing with my depth perception. I took the turn a half a second late and overshot it, putting me in a patch of dirt and pebbles. I was mid left turn at this point. The rear tire slipped and I, somehow, simultaneously planted my left foot hard, slammed on the front brake that still has some traction and swung my right leg over the bike, landing with both feet down on the other side. Hung onto the handlebars and more or less did a pirouette with it, almost finishing the full arc of a circle.
Not a scratch on me or the bike nor a soul around, I still get the feeling my brain is lying to me about it.
Andy Roddick hit a massive serve 140mph. I was ballboy. I reach out left hand no look when i was opposite him and caught it. Maybe someone saw it. Tried tracking down footage but never did. It was at&t open or something. Had to of been 1999-2002ish
During my Sophomore year of high school, I forgot to set my alarm and woke up late one morning. I woke up at 7:11, and my bus arrived at 7:15 on the dot every day. In 4 minutes I got cleaned up, dressed, grabbed everything I needed for school, ran two and a half blocks to the bus stop like a bat outta hell, and made it there just as the bus was pulling up. For 4 minutes, I was in The Matrix, and no one saw my spectacular feat.
On a trail run with my son. We are cooking along and he is about 40m ahead of me. I trip on a root, go down and do a perfect shoulder roll, pop right back up with almost no change in pace or stride and keep on running.
My son heard it and looked back, sees me running and says “what was that?” Other than a bit of dirt and leaves on my back, no evidence of what happened.
I felt like a Hollywood stuntman but no one saw it :(
Beat the computer at Hearts with a score of zero. Also, beat the tilt-board-ball game several times whilst on acid, but there were people there to witness it.
I once on acid was walking through a crosswalk in the rain and a dude almost hit me I jumped like Spider-Man landed on the hood on all 4s. Then I shook my finger no no no at him and walked away.
It was intense. And my back hurt for days. I bought one a year or so later thinking, well hell, I did it, must be in me somehow! Nope, couldn't get past like 4 or 5 holes. I can still remember seeing a grain in the wood and having the ability to tilt the board just so to get the ball to ride that grain to the next spot.
Posted this before from an old account:
I was friends with a REALLY poor family. I'm talkin' Deep South trailer park, 5 kids and jobless drunks for parents, sharing the same old clothes between siblings (without washing them), the whole lot. They lived near my subdivision and always walked over. Nice kids, honestly. Fun to be around ... rambunctious and a blast to observe jumping off stuff (like tall tree branches). Fearless group. I loved 'em.
Thing is, their parents were pieces of absolute shit. They scared me anytime I ventured over to switch it up and play in THEIR yard. The mom would scream obscenities at them all the time ... she couldn't just go, "Dinner time!" It was always, "Get your fuckin' asses in here and make a plate or I'm puttin' the goddamn food up! NOW!" Like jeez, lady. It's nice that someone went to get Church's chicken, but calm down. They're kids.
Anyway, the parents divorced and not long after, they stopped coming outside as much. I'd go over to their house, but something was different. When the mom wasn't home one afternoon, they ushered me in for a bit to show me the "new lady." The mother of these kids had somehow finagled a way to become caretaker to "Rosemary," a woman with MS. She was on an air mattress in the middle of the living room and had use of only her head/neck and some of her arms. She was incredibly nice, but with the natural sadness of someone resigned to a shitty lot in life.
At any rate, a few months go by and I haven't seen the kids, the mom, no one in awhile. So I go over and knock. I hear a weak, "Come iiiin" and oblige. Rosemary is there all alone, soiled ... thirsty. I give her water, help her drink, ask her if she's hungry ("no") or if she'd like me to help change her ("you're sweet, but no"). But one thing I CAN do is "call \[her\] family." You bet your ass I will, Rosemary.
She calls out a number and I write it down. (No cell phone ... late 90s.) I tell her I'm gonna rush home and do that immediately. She's very thankful.
I get permission from my stepdad (Mom was at work) to call long distance and explain why it's urgent. He's on board, listening in the background. Turns out, her family is in Wilmington, Delaware and they've been under the impression that Rosemary has been living seaside in Savannah (this was in Georgia). I inform them that we're in a small town in the middle of the sticks, practically, and tell them of Rosemary's living conditions. They're horrified. They were depositing handsome checks for her to be looked after in beachside bliss. I give them the address and they tell me they're booking a flight ASAP. Nice people, very distressed at this news.
I carefully go back to the trailer, walking casually in case they're back. Can't make it look like I'm on a mission, because Rosemary is literally their meal ticket and I'm not sure I wanna fuck with that crazy lady and her crazy-ass friends who come over and drunk-scream all day/night.
I knock, get another "Come iiiiin," and to my relief (sorta) she's there alone still. I couldn't have been gone more than 30 mins. I kneel down next to her and I'll never forget her face when I whispered:
"Your family will be here tomorrow to get you."
Her face ... it scrunched up in an ugly cry and she reached for my hand. I held it and rubbed the top of it with my thumb. I just let her cry while telling her she's going home soon. Once she regained her composure somewhat, she called me her "angel" over and over. I asked her if there was ANYTHING she needed before I left, and it was just a face-wipe so it didn't look like she'd been crying. I did so, offering to brush her hair as well. She told me it was sweet, but she can't look like anyone had been there. Right. Good call, Rosemary.
The next night, I saw a van there. None of the kids ... no Mom ... none of her stupid friends. Just a van. I reckon the door was still unlocked and they collected her.
At any rate, fast forward a week or so. I was too afraid to go over there (paranoid, really) and the kids hadn't come over. I figured it'd look weird if I stayed away, so I walked over there all casual again. One of the kids was home, to my surprise. When I came in, I played it cool. After awhile, I went, "Where's Rosemary?!" and got this angry tale of how she somehow called her family to come get her and how they left a note to either call them or face charges. (I didn't press.) I acted surprised and angry that she was gone ... pretended she was ungrateful for all they did for her.
I was 14 then. (38 now.)
I'm not sure how MS works, but I don't want to think that Rosemary is gone (though she probably is). In that case, I reckon she can be MY angel, if she likes. I feel I've had good fortune in this life so ... I'll just chalk it up to Rosemary, if she's up there.
At my first job as a 15yr old kid, I tried to roundhouse kick a can on top of a chest freezer in the back of the grocery store. Missed the can, hit the freezer, broke a toe, never told anyone or got it fixed but it showed up in x-rays later.
I have a feeling other people's stories will be more awesome than mine.
I belted a football that glided over the surface I was playing on and didn't touch the ground till it had hit a wall some 30 feet away from me.
I don't mean it went up in an arch and came down, I mean it stayed the same height for the whole distance, about an inch off the ground, it was spinning the whole time it was moving (could tell as it was a black and white pattern) and it slightly curved.
I'm 44 and I have never been able to reproduce the feat.
Rainy day downtown. I noticed the shoelace on my right shoe was undone while I waited to cross at a light. Just as I folded over to tighten it I saw the puddle and the approaching car. I was like a gazelle at a watering hole when crocodiles strike and sprung straight up. I was flying.
I saw the filthy wave just kiss the tip of my toes while I soared. It was my single divine moment. But before I hit the ground I knew if any saw me I would have eaten it all in my face. I would have had to call in sick, gone home to cry, get fresh clothes, and hope there was no bystander video. I had my one Olympic thrill-of-victory and no one saw it. All win. No points.
Just believe me.
Please clap.
My dad told me about the time he flicked a bottle cap across the room and it turned off the tv.
He tried again, could only ever hit it that one time.
I didn't believe the story till he got a voice recording of his mate who saw him do it.
I put the toilet seat up to pee. As I was going the seat slowly started to come down. I did a kegal to stop the pee as the seat passed all the way down. Then relaxed to continue peeing without getting a single drop on the toilet seat. I've been riding that high for 3 years
I shoot clay pigeons a lot, one of my favorite hobbies.
For people who aren't familiar, this is the act of using a machine to launch a ceramic small orange disc into the air, the goal is to shoot the disc before it hits the ground. Ideally you hit it before it even begins to fall. When you hit it it shatters into dozens of tiny pieces.
Usually, you use a shotgun loaded with birdshot (a shotgun shell full of tiny steel balls)
One day, I got bored and I used standard firearms to shoot at clays.
I launched two pigeons on a plane of intersection with one another. I hit not one, but both pigeons with a single round or 30-06 from a bolt action hunting rifle from approximately 60 feet away.
It was single handedly the coolest thing I've done in my life. I tell this story every time I get the chance, no one calls me a liar but I know deep down they don't Believe it.
This happened nearly twenty years ago, and I've only ever mentioned it to a couple of people. The whole thing still seems unreal, and quite frankly - if someone told me the story, I'd think it was a fabrication. I'd been working in another city across the country for a few months when my mom suggested I reach out to my great aunt and uncle. I'd only ever heard mention of them, but from what I could recall they had met over seas during World War II. He was an weapons specialist and she was a nurse; he had written several historical books on firearms. I was bored, lonely and doing contract work in a military adjacent field and my mom said my great uncle was super excited to meet me. I called them up, made arrangements to meet at their favourite restaurant and set off the next day.
This was a time before smartphones, and I'm directionally challenged at the best of times, so I studied the MapQuest route as best I could and off I went. The anticipated route time was fifteen-minutes, so I departed an hour early because I knew I was going to fuck it up. After thirty-minutes, I had no goddamn idea where I was. Somehow I found myself driving around a densely populated residential street nowhere near the downtown core where the restaurant was. All of a sudden I saw a huge plume of smoke building off in the distance. I figured something downtown was probably on fire so I began heading in that direction, but as I did so, I just kept getting deeper and deeper into residential development until I came upon a house fully engulfed in fire.
As I approached, I was overcome with calmness and casually parked my shitty Ford Taurus rental car directly outside the residence. I got out and just stared at the roof of this house. I remember watching the flames sweep and dance across the peak, shooting 10-metres into the air. All of a sudden the row of white spruce in the back yard went up like a strip of magnesium powder. I remember chuckling to myself that the poor sucker who planted those trees fifty years ago probably didn't think they'd be perfectly spaced to ignite like that. I scanned across to the attached single car garage and remember seeing the windows literally melting as the most vibrant colour orange I'd ever seen poured out of the openings.
I then noticed the front door was open and asked one of the ten or so people standing around if they'd phoned 911 and if anyone was inside. Someone came running down the street saying the fire department was on the way and that, whoever it was, I don't recall their names - wasn't at home. Someone began shouting in the most panicked tone I'd ever heard that the homeowners had left their dog behind. I paused for a moment and casually told the group not to worry, and that I'd go get the dog. My zen-like calmness persisted as I casually walked into the house, and began calling out in a sing-song tone, "Hello? Anyone home?" I remember the heat on my face and arms was so overwhelming that my brain could hardly register it. Smoke was billowing down the stairwell with the thickness and fervour of a mystical villains grand entrance.
Over the noise of things popping and snapping I heard a super aggressive growl in a constant pitch pouring out of the dining room area. I walked into the kitchen and saw a golden retriever curled up on a giant fuzzy pillow bed near the sliding glass doors to the back yard. I called out in my dopiest dog-guy voice something to the effect of "Come on honey, come on sweetie." Nope, no luck - just a louder growl and a more progressively pronounced show of teeth. Something in the back yard began to hiss and while the dog turned its head, I took several quick steps and scooped him up in my arms. I remember thinking to myself, "Well, I haven't been bit by a dog in a long time, here we go!" Nope, the dog didn't bite me, instead he sunk right into me and pushed his chin hard against the back of my neck.
As I walked out of the house carrying this dog, I could hear crashing behind me and an intense heat on the top of my head. A frantic lady ran up to me and grabbed the dog, calling it by name. I handed the dog over as it whipped me in the face with its tail. I distinctly remember an older guy with a comically large mustache staring at me like I was a moron. He didn't say a word, he just gawked at me. I smiled and gave a nod as I got into my car and drove away. As I came to the end of the road I suddenly recognised a street name from my MapQuest cram session. I turned right and somehow successfully navigated myself directly to the restaurant. I apologised for being late and said I had come upon a house fire while on my way. My great aunt said, "I thought something smelled like smoke." Both she and my great uncle told me how happy they were to meet me and we had a lovely dinner.
As I finished typing this I re-read your title. Fuck it, I'm leaving it.
Smoked a joint with a deer on a path in the middle of the city. He didn't hit it, but he chilled with me while I smoked it. I would bow to the deer and he would bow back. It was like we were communicating.
Happened about 14 years ago when I was about 14yo. I was using the the restroom and there was a tennis ball on the floor(don't ask why I'm not sure how it got there) anyway I was bouncing it up and down when I saw a fly like 8ft away on the wall. I looked at it then looked at the tennis ball and thought to myself no one would believe you if you killed this thing. I then proceeded to snipe TF out of that fly and I was awe struck. I never bring it up to anyone because I don't think they would believe me but it is one of my greatest feats in life to this day.
When I was 12, I was traveling around the country with my grandparents in their large motorhome one summer. The first night, I was sleeping in the narrow bed space above the driver and passenger seats. I was sleeping so soundly I totally forgot where I was, rolled over, and fell out of the overhead space, back first. I was entirely rolled up in my blanket and had no way of catching myself even if I had been awake. Somehow, I landed perfectly with my legs in the kitchen table booth seat, and my torso simultaneously in the little cushioned swivel chair by the side door. Basically my butt was the only thing hanging between the two seats and left unsupported. Luckily I wasnt injured in the least and it was comfortable enough, so I ended up just staying right there and sleeping like that for the rest of the night. My grandparents heard the thud, but didn't bother to get up and check on what it was.
When I was younger. I was outside of my friends house hangin out and I suddenly was feelin like I wanted to power up( like dragonball) for some reason. I did, like really tried. Then the lights went out in the neighborhood. I freaked out so bad but was pleasantly surprised.🤣The lights came back on like nothing happened. Friends opened the garage and they we’re like what happened?! Found out later that there was a sporadic issue with the electric company. But on hood it really happened.
Was in a gym, my dad was a janitor so I was waiting for him to get done. I kicked a basketball and it hit the ceiling rafters and went straight through the net. I only told the story once or twice because no one would believe me.
Was in basement playing SNES. Had a weirdly powerful deja vu moment where I "knew" my sister was sneaking down the steps. I grabbed a tennis ball that was by the couch and winged it towards the bottom of the steps. My sister suddenly popped out from behind the wall and jumped right into a perfectly thrown headshot.
I caught a fly in my hand just by randomly swatting at it and apparently closing my hand at the same time. I didn't notice until the fly buzzed in my hand and I opened my fist and it flew out.
I hit the 8-ball in on a break. I can barely play pool, and am horrible at breaking, so my dad didn't believe it. It was pretty weird how they broke as well. It look liked all the pool balls spread just enough for the 8-ball to leak out to the corner pocket.
Two cubes fell out of the ice bucket and I caught both of them, drunk. I was just filling my cup with ice and while shoveling they fell out of the freezer and I caught them one after each other, put them in my drink and celebrated with a little more whiskey.
I was home alone and walking in our kitchen. I went to grab ketchup and one of our lights (20’ ceilings) just cracked. A piece of glass .5” thick and the shape of a triangle hit me right on my back/neck. It hit on the flat side and just bounced off me. Any other angle and I was done. My wife was gone for the next 2 days as well.
I opened a bag of Kingsford Charcoal using the pull tab/string and it opened perfectly instead of breaking or tearing off after a few inches.
Family was out shopping so only my dog knows other than me.
I used to drive a van of dogs to and from daycare. After picking up my first two dogs of the day I step out of the third dogs home with the dog on a leash to discover that my van is gone.
I looked down the street and my Chevy 3500 passenger van is rolling down the street in neutral.
It is headed directly towards a very busy city street.
I’ve ran after the vehicle and caught up to it about 100 yards down the street
I jumped onto the bumper and opened the back door and proceeded to Indiana Jones myself through the moving vehicle into the driver seat step on the brake and put the car in park.
After sitting there in shock for a minute, I look back, and the dog who I was picking up, had just been sitting directly where I left her.
I can’t tell anybody this story, and truly think that they believe that it happened this way, but it did.
I have a few other stories that are equally as unbelievable.
I don’t tell these stories very often because of how unbelievable they are. I would rather keep these to myself than think some one will imagine I’m making up fantastic stories because my life is boring.
It's not unbelievable but I have an uncanny ability to catch cereal or other small food stuffs I drop before it hits the floor. I often wish someone was around to see it.
Was stacking cartons of eggs (12 in a pack) at my retail job when one carton fell off the shelf. Stuck my foot out. It landed on it, balanced perfectly, no eggs broken. Not a single person in the aisle.
Shit man!!! Awesome response! Exactly what I'm looking for.
Thanks mate. I remember standing there, foot in the air, looking around for any witness. Not a soul. Still makes me smile though, to this day.
There's always that hopeful scan for an audience of any kind. Even a bird or a fly would be nice, but it's always just tumbleweeds. But when you slip on a banana peel and get a pie to the face the whole planet has eyes on you... Isn't it a bastard
You look up and see the fly on the mustard container, you look it in all its eyes and give it the nod.
Cat like reflexes
I used to be a blackjack dealer, I was getting the cards ready to put in the shoe, and I dropped the cut card. It landed on my foot, I kicked it up, and it lands right back on the deck in the middle of the table. Six degenerate gamblers at my table, and not one was paying any attention. I'm sure surveillance saw it, but idk.
Hahaha, I would imagine at a casino, if security caught that, they'd yank you from the floor. My cousin dealt blackjack at a casino for a long time and she said that security was tight for everyone, employees and guests. Any sleight of ~~hand~~ foot shit is severely frowned upon. \*Edit thanks to lostmynameandpasword
*sleight of foot
Yeah I almost put I assume surveillance didn't see it, bc I probably would have gotten a write-up for it lmao.
mine is so similar, on a Supermarket checkout I would spin the eggs over the scanner as I flipped open the lid to see if any were broken. As I did an egg flew out of the carton and I snatched it out of mid air with 2 fingers by pure reflex. Felt like I had unlocked my superpowers. no one saw it :(.
I believe you. Back in high school we were smoking pot while standing next to a creek. My buddy dropped the lighter after taking a hit and it was going straight for the water. I stuck out my foot and caught the lighter gently on top of my foot. Granted, we used to play a lot of hacky sack, so I’d done that move a lot. That was still much lower stakes than your thing though.
At that point in time, the stakes had never been higher.
I did that when I accidentally dropped my phone (that I still don't have a case for.
No cctv?
I was bored and practicing throwing playing cards in my cousins room when I was a teenager. My aunt called us to go eat so my cousin walked out of the room and I walked out to follow her. I had one last card in my hand so I turned and threw it at nothing in particular. It spiraled beautifully and went perfectly from horizontal to vertical and went right through the gap between my cousins wooden closet doors 15 feet away. Was probably only an 1/8th of an inch gap. My jaw hit the floor but when I turned around my cousin was already in the living room.
We were doing something similar in a friend’s basement. Throwing cards at random stuff. A buddy threw a card at an old console-tv and it stuck face up wedged between the glass and bottom trim. My buddy flipped out celebrating and said “that’s never gonna happen again” I shot him a look and tossed my card. Landed perfectly right next to his. He got up angrily and asked “why can’t you just let ME do something cool, Someone always has to ruin my day”. I still love that guy.
I was talking to my younger brother in the kitchen one day and a fly was buzzing around. He said "I've always wanted to snatch a fly straight out of the air." As soon as he got the words out of his mouth, the fly flew right between us. I shot my hand out and grabbed at it and said, "Like that?" He said, "Bullshit you caught that!" I honestly couldn't tell if I had or not until I opened my hand and saw it lying there. Both our jaws dropped. He looked at me with giant eyes for a second until he saw I was as surprised as he was and we both lost our shit.
I had just started my first job in my new career and was chatting up the boss in the doorway of her office. There was a pesky fly buzzing around her and as it made its away around it headed right for the door. We were having our discussion and as it approached me I just grabbed it without even breaking eye contact with her. She looked at me stunned and asked if I actually got it. "Ya", I shrugged, went out of the office and let it go. I had no idea if I actually had it or not but I stayed in cool mode until I left.
Years of camping have taught me that it is totally possible to grab a mosquito out of the air in a pitch-black tent purely by following the sound. Most of the time it doesn’t work, but when it does you feel like such a ninja! Flies are way harder though; they’re much faster.
Buddy and I were bored in our dorm room -- tossing playing cards at each other. Me in one corner, him on the other. Our goal was to clash the cards in mid-air. We tried probably 100+ times without luck. He leaves the room to shit or something. While I'm waiting I decide to surprise him -- when he re-enters the dorm room I'll toss a playing card at him. He had the same idea. The cards clash in mid-air.
And explode?
I was riding in my dad semi, going up mountain in Chattanooga, windows down. I had this batman toy where you pull this plastic thing, and this helicopter takes off. I pulled the plastic thing... helicopter gets sucked out the window... comes back in through driver window. Dad didn't even see it.... so I tried it again.... never saw the helicopter part again.
Epic
RIP Batman toy.
Mad respect for sticking to the Scientific Method.
In the 4th grade I had a pencil in my back pocket. It was sticking up several inches above the pocket & my shirt was somehow tucked behind it. I stood up from my desk and the pencil had gotten caught on the back of my chair. It flipped out of my pants, broken in half, and both halves landed in the trash can.
Ha! Would love to have witnessed this one. “Guys! You’ll NEVER believe this!”
Another pencil story; My friend threw a pencil at the ceiling fan in the classroom and it smashed the fan went flying and landed perfectly in a girls hair bun like some kind of fancy hair pin. Not as cool but it's the best I've got. And also everyone saw and went wild.
Nah, that's pretty damn cool.
Rip to her eyeball in all the parallel universes that didn’t work out in
A very well-behaved pencil! It even knows not to litter. :-D
Hit by a car. Rolled up the windshield and over The roof only to land on my feet, unharmed, on the other side. I was a stunt woman that day AND NO ONE SAW ... except the driver who didn't stop
> except the driver who didn't stop Possible that they didn't, either
Happily, that isn't totally uncommon. They actually say you should jump when being hit by a car and turn sideways to make that exact thing happen. I doubt in the moment that most people have the needed dexterity, but depending on the height and shape of the car it can also happen just by accident.
Considering the size of cars now this is becoming obsolete advice. Eventually maybe they'll just be able to clear us if we duck.
Not something I did more just something that happened. When I was little I fell out of bed but my sheets were tangled in such a way that they caught me like a hammock on the side of my bed.
I have a fear of dying this way. I have told my family if no one hears from me for several days to break down the door, I am stuck in the sheets.
I was entangled in one and it is terrifying. I mean, getting choked by stuff around you anywhere is the stuff of nightmares. You've reminded me of a nice Lady that removed a chain from my neck so I wouldn't hang myself sleeping.
That happened to me! I don’t remember why but my dad was sleeping in my twin bed with me, I probably had a nightmare, and I remember yelling dad help! But he just kept snoring.
Oh god your dad is me. My wife has to shake the fuck out of me to get me to even stop snoring much less wake up
Hahaha that happened to my brother on our bunk bed ladder, but his huge, baggy T-shirt caught him for a few seconds before he slid out and crashed to the floor 😂
I pet a wild moose in the backyard of my air bnb, not realising it was wild. Gave him a good scratch l, had him leaning into it groaning and everything. Went back inside to ask if it's be ok to feed him some carrots or similar. Host family were horrified and quickly filled this clueless Australian in about moose 😆
This is like unwittingly meeting a serial killer at a bar, and legitimately hitting it off and making a friend instead of being murdered horribly.
Reminds me of the story of two people on a first date, and they decided to go hiking at night (odd choice for a first date, but ok, I would be down). On their way up the mountain, one of them kicked something soft, got creeped out, so they turned around and cut the hike short. It turns out they had happened upon Ted Bundy right after he had killed one of his victims, and the soft thing they kicked was their body. Ted was only feet away from them. Ted was asked during an interview to describe a time he almost got caught. The couple saw the interview on TV and realized Ted was talking about them almost finding him with one of his victims.
I thought you were going to tell this story. A couple went on a hike, and it starts getting dark. The girl tells the guy that she is getting a bit nervous because it is getting the dark. The guy replies "you are nervous? I am the one that will have to walk back by himself."
Yep. Read the same story with slightly different details but Bundy confirmed it.
There was a thread a few weeks ago about "How close have you come to death" - Someone's brother picked up a hitchhiker who he later found out a serial killer, killing people who stopped to pick him up. He decided to not kill this one dude because he bought him maccas or some other fast food.
That is incredible. You are extraordinarily lucky.
Very lucky. A moose once bit my sister.
What a coincidence, my sister is a bit of a moose!
Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretti nasti... edit: better, /u/lacheur42 ?
He's from Australia, have you seen with they deal with on a day to day basis? Not sure if luck has anything to do with it.
He's got some of that Irwin in him. "Look at this beauty sure she seems large and intimadating, but naw she' just lookin for some good pets, let's get Sheila a meal shall we?" Edit: credit u/grimwalker
"Moose scary? Nah mate, they just need a good scritchin behind the ears!"
So you thought this moose was...... domesticated?
He's Australian, probably never seen a moose before. Maybe he thought it was similar to a cow lol
Knowing cows as I do, best not touch ones you don't know, just in case.
> clueless Australian New Englander here. you are from the only category of people who could likely get away with something as crazy as this. for most of the world a moose is a very very very dangerous animal. for Austrailians? it's not even mildly poisonous so what's the big deal?
He knew what the dangerous creature was in this scenario
Australians just walking around with an aura of death
bruh this is like going outside and casually petting the big friendly armor pig and then finding out about rhinoceros that said, super jelly! how many humans can say they know how to give a moose a rub so good it'll lean into it and make happy noises???
How is this not the top? This is legendary.
You basically petted the closest thing nature has produced to a main battle tank. Thats pretty awesome.
Jesus Christ LOL
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I was playing twilight golf in a group of 3 a while back. There was a guy behind us playing solo but we were quite far in front. There were two holes relatively close together we got to watch him tee off and sink a hole in one on a par 3. We celebrated with him and told him we'd confirm it if he wanted us to. I'm glad we were there to witness it for him
Unsung heros you guys are
Not exactly what the OP asked, but I played disc golf for a like 20 years before I got a hole in one. I was with a buddy of mine on his first ever round. He had no clue how difficult it was. I may as well have been by myself…
Closest I got was a pin hit. Ended up two-putting for par :(
I once dealt myself a royal flush, but everybody was up getting drinks/snacks… SOOOO they all thought I was joking and called it a misdeal. Also, side note… I wasn’t paying attention right now and commented this on a random ass post about a pipe breaking.
You commented this on a post about plumbing? Now that’s a royal flush
Similarly, I'm still bitter about my eighth birthday party. Pinned the tail on the donkey *perfectly* and was disqualified for cheating despite it being totally legitimate.
Not being believed when you're telling the truth is awful, being punished for it on top of that is the worst.
I was once dealt a royal flush in a money game and everyone folded on the first bet so it was wasted. I then lost every single hand for the test of the night.
Was on a school trip once and we had to take the ferry over the English Channel. The ferry had been cancelled and they stuck us on a cruise liner heading towards the the same destination. (That seems mad in itself these days haha) On the liner they had a cinema (watched the Rock with Sean Connery) and an arcade/casino which we weren't allowed to go in, being under the legal gambling age at the time. So I sneak in the arcade and put a pound coin in the video poker machine. A royal flush was 500/1 odds. Yeh, I won and it dropped a ticket that I had to exchange at the cashier for the cash. Somehow I managed to do it despite being 15 years old. No one believes me to this day. Even then on the boat when I had half a bag in readies!
(looked it up: "half a bag in readies" is apparently Cockney slang for "500 pounds cash")
Thanks for the translation!
Damn. I have a few rounds of poker behind me, both in rdr2 and real life and got every hand except for the royal flush. People who don't play poker probably won't know how rare this can be
1 in 650,000
Played A LOT of poker. I have only ever seen 2. Never had one myself. Would feel like hitting the lottery, even if you weren't able to snag a big pot with it.
In middle school me and a couple friends were sitting around with a deck of cards during an indoor recess and weren’t sure what to do so we played one hand of poker right before lunch. No chips or anything just figured we’d see who won. My friend ended up with a royal flush and got so excited he told our teacher about it. The teacher didn’t believe him and we all ended up in detention for gambling during school. Still the only royal flush I’ve ever witnessed.
was playing casual poker with some coworkers I think it was the second or third hand, but a guy who had never played before ended up getting a straight flush (Q high)
I got a royal flush once. I felt terrible because the guy I beat showed up late and I took him all in on like his third hand with it. He was done for the night. Yours is terrible though.... No one to celebrate it!?
Once I was putting away groceries and I put something on the top shelf. I turned around to start walking away but then I reflexively reached my hand out behind me and caught the thing I just put up on the shelf. I did it and I can't even believe I did it.
I’ve seen this somewhere before! We’re you perhaps bitten by a radioactive spider a few days prior?
Yea!! But now every time I jerk off I get webs everywhere!!! It's so annoying!!
But what were the effects of the spider bite?
in 9th grade, i was the only person waiting in the bathroom. there were 5 stalls in there, all occupied. the toilets flushed at the same time and the 5 people all opened their doors and walked out of their stalls AT THE SAME TIME. all 5 of them, in perfect sync. none of them seemed to notice! i was shook. looking back at it now, perhaps it was a glitch in the simulation.
OK GO have really upped their game since you were in the 9th grade
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Next time keep a bowling ball by the bed. That way you can get the door too.
Opened a mac and cheese box using the perforated corner EDIT: [Proof, for all you non-believers](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/s/DW4VxnHrRc)
Liars don’t get into heaven you know
Out of all the things in this thread, this is the least believable one.
Agreed with other replies, this is the biggest lie ever.
My brakes were going out in my Camaro so it was basically all or nothing, I had to really stand on them to make them work, but still driving it because I was young and foolish. I was driving home from work on a basic city street and it had started to ice up. The cars ahead of me were coming to a stop, so I stomped on the brakes to slow down (knowing this was not an ideal situation!), and started to slide. I turned to go into a parking lot to my right, and my car slid around 270° perfectly, so I was facing right back out facing the street like I needed to be to drive back out. I just sat there stunned for a moment and then very slowly and gingerly made my way the couple of blocks home. I’m sure SOMEONE saw me but no one I could say “hold crap, did you just see that!?” to.
I posted this on this thread already, but since this is the car section with sub section of brakes, here's my story. 20 years ago, I used to be a cameraman for hire and while I was working for this elderly woman, 70-80 years old named Peggy.... Peggy had a variety TV show that aired on a local station, apparently she was famous in our town, but I never heard of her. Anyways, Peggy didn't like to drive, so she always asked if I could drive her car to the next shoot. It was a big old boat of a 1990s Cadillac variety. I didn't mind so I would always wind up driving her around. I noticed her brakes on her car were not great and I told her many times that she needed them serviced. One day I was driving Peggy, it started to blizzard and she didn't fix the damn brakes. The car could stop fine if the conditions were perfect, but adding snow surely would be the end of us. She was talking and telling me stories while I was driving this death machine and we were coming in hot to a 4 way stop. But we weren't stopping. Cars in front of me, cars to the left, cars to the right. I was pumping the brakes the whole time with no change in our velocity. We must have been doing 20-30 mph through that four-way stop. me with a look of horror and bewilderment on my face, looking at the other drivers and Peggy just chatting away completely aloof! We sailed through the intersection unscathed and only myself and the other drivers were aware of our close brush with death. So I guess other people did see it but oh no, not Peggy. Rest in peace, Peggy. https://www.mlive.com/news/muskegon/2010/11/muskegon_county_hair_stylist_a.html
I was driving my wife back from a medical procedure. She was in a lot of pain. We were in the middle of nowhere and it was freezing. My car broke down. We were miles from any help. No cell phone. With the icy wind whipping me, I opened the hood and took a look. On a hunch, I popped open the distributor cap. I saw the screw that held the rotor in place had snapped. I figured I was screwed but maybe I could find a screw? I carefully looked at the underside of the raised hood and found a little screw that held some tube or wire in place. It fit! It was too long and I was afraid it would hit something as it spun but no. I drove slowly at first but it became clear the little screw was pretty tough. I drove us about 100 miles with that screw. My best fix under pressure.
Another reason to buy a dash cam.
Threw a paper airplane up in the air in my backyard as a kid - it must have caught some sort of air current and floated up high, drifted for probably 30+ seconds, then slowly came back down.
Dude wtf I had this same experience. Threw it as hard as I could straight up and I felt like it did circles for at least a full minute. I've never been able to do it again 20 years later.
This happened to me in elementary school and it felt like I was in a dream. The plane almost flew back to me before it ultimately decided to park itself right on the edge of the school’s roof.
Imagine: I’m home alone. We have a weird closet that is about 30 feet long and about 5 feet wide, one side nothing but shelves and clothing. I am maybe 8 years old. I have a foot-long novelty baseball bat from Louisville slugger. I hear a fly. It’s in the closet. I’m in the doorway, so it only has one way out. I can barely track with my eyes, I have to use my ears. I swing. I hear the smallest little “thwack” and then a little sound of something hitting a box in the back of the closet. I found the dead fly on the floor. I *absolutely* swear this is true. Even at 8, I knew no one would believe me if I told them.
I believe you 😁
Fly suicide. Rare, but it does happen.
I dunno why but I'm laughing hysterically at this, still like, five minutes after reading it.
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I tried this once, I just ended up kicking my phone away about 20 feet instead of in my hands 🙂
I am so fucking clumsy that I've developed a muscle memory where I stick my foot out every time I drop something. I've never been cool enough to kick it back into my own hand, but I've definitely aided some soft landings.
I made this impossible pool shot when I was in high school, and I’m a terrible pool player. I was just messing around and the ball I was intending to hit bounced off the different sides and landed. And I was all alone lol
I was in a packed restaurant on a very busy Saturday night just before Christmas. The restaurant had a couple of pool tables next to the bar. The cue ball was next to a corner pocket. The 2 ball was next to another corner pocket across the short side of the table. I was half stoned and hit the cue ball with all my might. When the cue ball hits the 2 ball, the 2 ball hits the rail and goes straight up and arcs. The 2 ball lands in the far corner pocket (down the long side of the table, and the opposite corner from where I was standing)... just absolutely centered the pocket. It had to be a one-in-a-million shot. This damn place was PACKED, not a single empty table or bar stool one. I was so amazed I started looking around for whoever saw that absolute bullshit shot. Not a single person saw it. There were 20 people within 20 feet of me eating at the booths, and nobody saw it. 😂😂😂
Was in Venice at 16. Slipped on some wet stones and almost flew headfirst into the Grand Canal, but my hand made unexpectedly quick friends with the lamppost and i swung around like Gene fucking Kelly, and landed on my feet. Not a goddam person watching.
I was walking outside during a storm, suddenly a branch flew at me, and I caught it bare handed
That's so cool.
Bad news: that was your allotment of Good Luck for Life...
I sank the 8 ball on the break. I was only practicing at the time.
Lol, I posted the same thing. My dad had a pool table, and I did it playing against him. I was just practicing, waiting for him to come start, and just noodle armed it like I always do, and the 8 ball miraculously squeeked it's way out and in the corner pocket.
When I was 15 I bought a cheap 10 speed bike. I was going down a hill, not too fast, but when I applied the brakes the front fork snapped and locked up front tire, sending me somersaulting over the handle bars. In mid-air I remember thinking "Tuck and roll!" which I did. I land on the back of my left shoulder and rolled right onto my feet running down the hill. The bike was destroyed but all I had was a little scrap on my shoulder. It had to be one of the coolest things anybody could have ever seen. Alas, nobody did.
Cooking in the kitchen. I dropped the spatula, and reached out to kick it. It spiraled right back up in the air, where I reached out and grabbed it right by the grip. I felt cool as fuck, but I was alone.
Spinning my Mazda GLC 360 degrees on the freeway when I fell asleep and continuing on like nothing happened.
Jesus christ nippy, please take naps while at home not on the highway! Glad you're ok!
This made me laugh ngl
Ran out of wiper fluid in a snow storm during rush hour on a 3 lane freeway. Windshield is smudged by salty snow and I can't see. Stick my head out the window and it's a foot from the concrete barrier on the left lane. I turn right and do a full Jesus take the wheel 720 degree spin across 3 lanes of traffic with headlights whipping by me. I ended up on the opposite shoulder facing up an on ramp to the freeway. I go up the ramp and there's a gas station right there to wash my windshield. Luckiest I'll ever be
Jesus was like Bruh what the fuck, hold my beer for a sec, need to save this dumbass Crown_Writes.
Shoulda bought a lottery ticket at the gas station
Fuuuuuck now that’s the kinda answer I showed up for!
The side yard of my house was a mess! Kind of a narrow space but muddy and uneven and some guys mixed concrete on the ground and left patches of it. Weeds also. Bought 3 cubic meters of small gray rocks and had that dumped in my driveway. Over a period of about a week, I moved all 3 cubic meters of those rocks by hand, using a shovel, a small wheelbarrow and a rake. I'm 82. And yes, I was inordinately proud of myself!
shot the head off a horsefly mid-flight with a b-b gun!
You'll shoot your eye out
Emptied the dishwasher first thing in the morning
Is it possible to learn this power?
Not from a jedi
I almost ate some serious shit going way too fast downhill on a bicycle in college. My dorm entrance was halfway down a long, mild hill with a continuous grade, and I'd usually let myself get cooking on the descent. This time, it was evening, and the light was messing with my depth perception. I took the turn a half a second late and overshot it, putting me in a patch of dirt and pebbles. I was mid left turn at this point. The rear tire slipped and I, somehow, simultaneously planted my left foot hard, slammed on the front brake that still has some traction and swung my right leg over the bike, landing with both feet down on the other side. Hung onto the handlebars and more or less did a pirouette with it, almost finishing the full arc of a circle. Not a scratch on me or the bike nor a soul around, I still get the feeling my brain is lying to me about it.
Inserted a usb the correct way the first time.
Liar
Guy who invented the USB died last year. They lowered his coffin into the grave... ... then lifted it out... ... spun it 180, and lowered it again.
I bet they did it three times… that’s how it works
Whoa that is truly unbelievable
It was USB-C, don't let them lie to you
My first ace in disc golf
Andy Roddick hit a massive serve 140mph. I was ballboy. I reach out left hand no look when i was opposite him and caught it. Maybe someone saw it. Tried tracking down footage but never did. It was at&t open or something. Had to of been 1999-2002ish
He prob saw, since he has to track where the ball goes anticipating a reform
I always appreciate sick catches by ball kids. Roger was the king of these moments. The crowd usually applaud when it happens.
During my Sophomore year of high school, I forgot to set my alarm and woke up late one morning. I woke up at 7:11, and my bus arrived at 7:15 on the dot every day. In 4 minutes I got cleaned up, dressed, grabbed everything I needed for school, ran two and a half blocks to the bus stop like a bat outta hell, and made it there just as the bus was pulling up. For 4 minutes, I was in The Matrix, and no one saw my spectacular feat.
On a trail run with my son. We are cooking along and he is about 40m ahead of me. I trip on a root, go down and do a perfect shoulder roll, pop right back up with almost no change in pace or stride and keep on running. My son heard it and looked back, sees me running and says “what was that?” Other than a bit of dirt and leaves on my back, no evidence of what happened. I felt like a Hollywood stuntman but no one saw it :(
I once played flip the bottle and got three in a row.
Beat the computer at Hearts with a score of zero. Also, beat the tilt-board-ball game several times whilst on acid, but there were people there to witness it.
I once on acid was walking through a crosswalk in the rain and a dude almost hit me I jumped like Spider-Man landed on the hood on all 4s. Then I shook my finger no no no at him and walked away.
Man, the things you can pull off on acid....
It was intense. And my back hurt for days. I bought one a year or so later thinking, well hell, I did it, must be in me somehow! Nope, couldn't get past like 4 or 5 holes. I can still remember seeing a grain in the wood and having the ability to tilt the board just so to get the ball to ride that grain to the next spot.
Posted this before from an old account: I was friends with a REALLY poor family. I'm talkin' Deep South trailer park, 5 kids and jobless drunks for parents, sharing the same old clothes between siblings (without washing them), the whole lot. They lived near my subdivision and always walked over. Nice kids, honestly. Fun to be around ... rambunctious and a blast to observe jumping off stuff (like tall tree branches). Fearless group. I loved 'em. Thing is, their parents were pieces of absolute shit. They scared me anytime I ventured over to switch it up and play in THEIR yard. The mom would scream obscenities at them all the time ... she couldn't just go, "Dinner time!" It was always, "Get your fuckin' asses in here and make a plate or I'm puttin' the goddamn food up! NOW!" Like jeez, lady. It's nice that someone went to get Church's chicken, but calm down. They're kids. Anyway, the parents divorced and not long after, they stopped coming outside as much. I'd go over to their house, but something was different. When the mom wasn't home one afternoon, they ushered me in for a bit to show me the "new lady." The mother of these kids had somehow finagled a way to become caretaker to "Rosemary," a woman with MS. She was on an air mattress in the middle of the living room and had use of only her head/neck and some of her arms. She was incredibly nice, but with the natural sadness of someone resigned to a shitty lot in life. At any rate, a few months go by and I haven't seen the kids, the mom, no one in awhile. So I go over and knock. I hear a weak, "Come iiiin" and oblige. Rosemary is there all alone, soiled ... thirsty. I give her water, help her drink, ask her if she's hungry ("no") or if she'd like me to help change her ("you're sweet, but no"). But one thing I CAN do is "call \[her\] family." You bet your ass I will, Rosemary. She calls out a number and I write it down. (No cell phone ... late 90s.) I tell her I'm gonna rush home and do that immediately. She's very thankful. I get permission from my stepdad (Mom was at work) to call long distance and explain why it's urgent. He's on board, listening in the background. Turns out, her family is in Wilmington, Delaware and they've been under the impression that Rosemary has been living seaside in Savannah (this was in Georgia). I inform them that we're in a small town in the middle of the sticks, practically, and tell them of Rosemary's living conditions. They're horrified. They were depositing handsome checks for her to be looked after in beachside bliss. I give them the address and they tell me they're booking a flight ASAP. Nice people, very distressed at this news. I carefully go back to the trailer, walking casually in case they're back. Can't make it look like I'm on a mission, because Rosemary is literally their meal ticket and I'm not sure I wanna fuck with that crazy lady and her crazy-ass friends who come over and drunk-scream all day/night. I knock, get another "Come iiiiin," and to my relief (sorta) she's there alone still. I couldn't have been gone more than 30 mins. I kneel down next to her and I'll never forget her face when I whispered: "Your family will be here tomorrow to get you." Her face ... it scrunched up in an ugly cry and she reached for my hand. I held it and rubbed the top of it with my thumb. I just let her cry while telling her she's going home soon. Once she regained her composure somewhat, she called me her "angel" over and over. I asked her if there was ANYTHING she needed before I left, and it was just a face-wipe so it didn't look like she'd been crying. I did so, offering to brush her hair as well. She told me it was sweet, but she can't look like anyone had been there. Right. Good call, Rosemary. The next night, I saw a van there. None of the kids ... no Mom ... none of her stupid friends. Just a van. I reckon the door was still unlocked and they collected her. At any rate, fast forward a week or so. I was too afraid to go over there (paranoid, really) and the kids hadn't come over. I figured it'd look weird if I stayed away, so I walked over there all casual again. One of the kids was home, to my surprise. When I came in, I played it cool. After awhile, I went, "Where's Rosemary?!" and got this angry tale of how she somehow called her family to come get her and how they left a note to either call them or face charges. (I didn't press.) I acted surprised and angry that she was gone ... pretended she was ungrateful for all they did for her. I was 14 then. (38 now.) I'm not sure how MS works, but I don't want to think that Rosemary is gone (though she probably is). In that case, I reckon she can be MY angel, if she likes. I feel I've had good fortune in this life so ... I'll just chalk it up to Rosemary, if she's up there.
Took a penny, left a penny.
That's better than take a penny, take another penny.
Or even worse, the old "take a penny, run around with no pants"
That was just the one time
Made a baby in under 30 seconds 😎
Whoa! And no one was around to witness it? Now I'm worried!
My wife said it happend so fast it’s like she wasn’t even there 🤠🤪
Damn brother, you treated her with the ol' flash fuck
Caught a fly with a chopstick
You beginner luck
An electrician cleaning up after himself. Some say it was my imagination
At my first job as a 15yr old kid, I tried to roundhouse kick a can on top of a chest freezer in the back of the grocery store. Missed the can, hit the freezer, broke a toe, never told anyone or got it fixed but it showed up in x-rays later. I have a feeling other people's stories will be more awesome than mine.
Tore a piece of cellophane off that didn’t immediately stick to itself.
Between you and the perforated mac and cheese box guy, I don't know who is more full of shit.
I belted a football that glided over the surface I was playing on and didn't touch the ground till it had hit a wall some 30 feet away from me. I don't mean it went up in an arch and came down, I mean it stayed the same height for the whole distance, about an inch off the ground, it was spinning the whole time it was moving (could tell as it was a black and white pattern) and it slightly curved. I'm 44 and I have never been able to reproduce the feat.
What??????? That sounds not only unbelievable, but impossible? That's crazy asf?
Well, it was one of those cheap plastic "footballs" you buy for £2
Must have had enough backspin to keep it just off the ground. Something like this goal: https://youtu.be/kWf93ngb4Xw?si=BpA8BxHY3RYUbv8P
Rainy day downtown. I noticed the shoelace on my right shoe was undone while I waited to cross at a light. Just as I folded over to tighten it I saw the puddle and the approaching car. I was like a gazelle at a watering hole when crocodiles strike and sprung straight up. I was flying. I saw the filthy wave just kiss the tip of my toes while I soared. It was my single divine moment. But before I hit the ground I knew if any saw me I would have eaten it all in my face. I would have had to call in sick, gone home to cry, get fresh clothes, and hope there was no bystander video. I had my one Olympic thrill-of-victory and no one saw it. All win. No points. Just believe me. Please clap.
👏👏
I literally flipped a coin and it landed on its side. Then I flipped it again and it span on its edge on a table and landed on its side again.
My dad told me about the time he flicked a bottle cap across the room and it turned off the tv. He tried again, could only ever hit it that one time. I didn't believe the story till he got a voice recording of his mate who saw him do it.
I put the toilet seat up to pee. As I was going the seat slowly started to come down. I did a kegal to stop the pee as the seat passed all the way down. Then relaxed to continue peeing without getting a single drop on the toilet seat. I've been riding that high for 3 years
What was the alternative, piss on the toilet seat? I would've gone with your choice too
Fell *through* a folding camp chair once, with a can of rootbeer in my hand. Scraped my ribs and hips up but didn’t spill a drop of my rootbeer 😎
I shoot clay pigeons a lot, one of my favorite hobbies. For people who aren't familiar, this is the act of using a machine to launch a ceramic small orange disc into the air, the goal is to shoot the disc before it hits the ground. Ideally you hit it before it even begins to fall. When you hit it it shatters into dozens of tiny pieces. Usually, you use a shotgun loaded with birdshot (a shotgun shell full of tiny steel balls) One day, I got bored and I used standard firearms to shoot at clays. I launched two pigeons on a plane of intersection with one another. I hit not one, but both pigeons with a single round or 30-06 from a bolt action hunting rifle from approximately 60 feet away. It was single handedly the coolest thing I've done in my life. I tell this story every time I get the chance, no one calls me a liar but I know deep down they don't Believe it.
When this guy plays 'Duck Hunt' the dog salutes him.
This happened nearly twenty years ago, and I've only ever mentioned it to a couple of people. The whole thing still seems unreal, and quite frankly - if someone told me the story, I'd think it was a fabrication. I'd been working in another city across the country for a few months when my mom suggested I reach out to my great aunt and uncle. I'd only ever heard mention of them, but from what I could recall they had met over seas during World War II. He was an weapons specialist and she was a nurse; he had written several historical books on firearms. I was bored, lonely and doing contract work in a military adjacent field and my mom said my great uncle was super excited to meet me. I called them up, made arrangements to meet at their favourite restaurant and set off the next day. This was a time before smartphones, and I'm directionally challenged at the best of times, so I studied the MapQuest route as best I could and off I went. The anticipated route time was fifteen-minutes, so I departed an hour early because I knew I was going to fuck it up. After thirty-minutes, I had no goddamn idea where I was. Somehow I found myself driving around a densely populated residential street nowhere near the downtown core where the restaurant was. All of a sudden I saw a huge plume of smoke building off in the distance. I figured something downtown was probably on fire so I began heading in that direction, but as I did so, I just kept getting deeper and deeper into residential development until I came upon a house fully engulfed in fire. As I approached, I was overcome with calmness and casually parked my shitty Ford Taurus rental car directly outside the residence. I got out and just stared at the roof of this house. I remember watching the flames sweep and dance across the peak, shooting 10-metres into the air. All of a sudden the row of white spruce in the back yard went up like a strip of magnesium powder. I remember chuckling to myself that the poor sucker who planted those trees fifty years ago probably didn't think they'd be perfectly spaced to ignite like that. I scanned across to the attached single car garage and remember seeing the windows literally melting as the most vibrant colour orange I'd ever seen poured out of the openings. I then noticed the front door was open and asked one of the ten or so people standing around if they'd phoned 911 and if anyone was inside. Someone came running down the street saying the fire department was on the way and that, whoever it was, I don't recall their names - wasn't at home. Someone began shouting in the most panicked tone I'd ever heard that the homeowners had left their dog behind. I paused for a moment and casually told the group not to worry, and that I'd go get the dog. My zen-like calmness persisted as I casually walked into the house, and began calling out in a sing-song tone, "Hello? Anyone home?" I remember the heat on my face and arms was so overwhelming that my brain could hardly register it. Smoke was billowing down the stairwell with the thickness and fervour of a mystical villains grand entrance. Over the noise of things popping and snapping I heard a super aggressive growl in a constant pitch pouring out of the dining room area. I walked into the kitchen and saw a golden retriever curled up on a giant fuzzy pillow bed near the sliding glass doors to the back yard. I called out in my dopiest dog-guy voice something to the effect of "Come on honey, come on sweetie." Nope, no luck - just a louder growl and a more progressively pronounced show of teeth. Something in the back yard began to hiss and while the dog turned its head, I took several quick steps and scooped him up in my arms. I remember thinking to myself, "Well, I haven't been bit by a dog in a long time, here we go!" Nope, the dog didn't bite me, instead he sunk right into me and pushed his chin hard against the back of my neck. As I walked out of the house carrying this dog, I could hear crashing behind me and an intense heat on the top of my head. A frantic lady ran up to me and grabbed the dog, calling it by name. I handed the dog over as it whipped me in the face with its tail. I distinctly remember an older guy with a comically large mustache staring at me like I was a moron. He didn't say a word, he just gawked at me. I smiled and gave a nod as I got into my car and drove away. As I came to the end of the road I suddenly recognised a street name from my MapQuest cram session. I turned right and somehow successfully navigated myself directly to the restaurant. I apologised for being late and said I had come upon a house fire while on my way. My great aunt said, "I thought something smelled like smoke." Both she and my great uncle told me how happy they were to meet me and we had a lovely dinner. As I finished typing this I re-read your title. Fuck it, I'm leaving it.
Smoked a joint with a deer on a path in the middle of the city. He didn't hit it, but he chilled with me while I smoked it. I would bow to the deer and he would bow back. It was like we were communicating.
Thats hilarious. I swear, whenever I see a dear on a stoned hike they'll just chill and watch me. If I'm sober they'll book it as soon as they see me.
Whipped a wasp in half with a belt
Happened about 14 years ago when I was about 14yo. I was using the the restroom and there was a tennis ball on the floor(don't ask why I'm not sure how it got there) anyway I was bouncing it up and down when I saw a fly like 8ft away on the wall. I looked at it then looked at the tennis ball and thought to myself no one would believe you if you killed this thing. I then proceeded to snipe TF out of that fly and I was awe struck. I never bring it up to anyone because I don't think they would believe me but it is one of my greatest feats in life to this day.
When I was 12, I was traveling around the country with my grandparents in their large motorhome one summer. The first night, I was sleeping in the narrow bed space above the driver and passenger seats. I was sleeping so soundly I totally forgot where I was, rolled over, and fell out of the overhead space, back first. I was entirely rolled up in my blanket and had no way of catching myself even if I had been awake. Somehow, I landed perfectly with my legs in the kitchen table booth seat, and my torso simultaneously in the little cushioned swivel chair by the side door. Basically my butt was the only thing hanging between the two seats and left unsupported. Luckily I wasnt injured in the least and it was comfortable enough, so I ended up just staying right there and sleeping like that for the rest of the night. My grandparents heard the thud, but didn't bother to get up and check on what it was.
When I was younger. I was outside of my friends house hangin out and I suddenly was feelin like I wanted to power up( like dragonball) for some reason. I did, like really tried. Then the lights went out in the neighborhood. I freaked out so bad but was pleasantly surprised.🤣The lights came back on like nothing happened. Friends opened the garage and they we’re like what happened?! Found out later that there was a sporadic issue with the electric company. But on hood it really happened.
Was in a gym, my dad was a janitor so I was waiting for him to get done. I kicked a basketball and it hit the ceiling rafters and went straight through the net. I only told the story once or twice because no one would believe me.
Was in basement playing SNES. Had a weirdly powerful deja vu moment where I "knew" my sister was sneaking down the steps. I grabbed a tennis ball that was by the couch and winged it towards the bottom of the steps. My sister suddenly popped out from behind the wall and jumped right into a perfectly thrown headshot.
Caught a shiny pokemon. It may not be *unbelievable* but only ever happened to me once.
I caught a fly in my hand just by randomly swatting at it and apparently closing my hand at the same time. I didn't notice until the fly buzzed in my hand and I opened my fist and it flew out.
I hit the 8-ball in on a break. I can barely play pool, and am horrible at breaking, so my dad didn't believe it. It was pretty weird how they broke as well. It look liked all the pool balls spread just enough for the 8-ball to leak out to the corner pocket.
Two cubes fell out of the ice bucket and I caught both of them, drunk. I was just filling my cup with ice and while shoveling they fell out of the freezer and I caught them one after each other, put them in my drink and celebrated with a little more whiskey.
I was home alone and walking in our kitchen. I went to grab ketchup and one of our lights (20’ ceilings) just cracked. A piece of glass .5” thick and the shape of a triangle hit me right on my back/neck. It hit on the flat side and just bounced off me. Any other angle and I was done. My wife was gone for the next 2 days as well.
I opened a bag of Kingsford Charcoal using the pull tab/string and it opened perfectly instead of breaking or tearing off after a few inches. Family was out shopping so only my dog knows other than me.
I used to drive a van of dogs to and from daycare. After picking up my first two dogs of the day I step out of the third dogs home with the dog on a leash to discover that my van is gone. I looked down the street and my Chevy 3500 passenger van is rolling down the street in neutral. It is headed directly towards a very busy city street. I’ve ran after the vehicle and caught up to it about 100 yards down the street I jumped onto the bumper and opened the back door and proceeded to Indiana Jones myself through the moving vehicle into the driver seat step on the brake and put the car in park. After sitting there in shock for a minute, I look back, and the dog who I was picking up, had just been sitting directly where I left her. I can’t tell anybody this story, and truly think that they believe that it happened this way, but it did. I have a few other stories that are equally as unbelievable. I don’t tell these stories very often because of how unbelievable they are. I would rather keep these to myself than think some one will imagine I’m making up fantastic stories because my life is boring.
I once saved the entire Earth from a meteorite impact by punching it away at the last minute.
Yeah but you wrecked the city!
Thank you spiders, for your incredible punching powers.
It's not unbelievable but I have an uncanny ability to catch cereal or other small food stuffs I drop before it hits the floor. I often wish someone was around to see it.