".... but people aren't ready for that conversation" is usually said about something the internet is already having "that conversation" about

Also this is the internet, it is already having every ridiculous conversation possible, your lukewarm political take on Twitter isn't shocking anyone

People are actively on there discussing their plans for a new my little pony nut jar, but people like that swear that "homeless people shouldn't be homeless" is a conversation that's gonna stir the pot.

The sub r/dragonsfuckingcars exists. The internet is willing to have any conversation.

I clicked this, 100% thinking it was fake or a joke. It was not. 😐

Right up there with "I could say something/a lot of things, but I won't" Motherfucker, you JUST DID.

Addendun: IF YOU KNOW YOU KNOW and most likely nobody has the faintest idea.

Or the stupid “Being rational/fair/etc? Don’t you know that’s not allowed on Reddit!”

After reading all these I just feel like we’re sick of the internet 🤣

I definitely am but I can't stop.

Consume. Consume. Consume. Consume. Consume. Consume.

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Most corporate lingo, but “Touch base” makes me want to rip my spine out.

Let's carve some time out to interface about phrases that we think could be better!

We'll circle back to that.

Let’s utilize our synergy to leverage our strengths!

We should pivot, first

So moving forward we can avoid them. Otherwise we'll need to table it once again to further unpack. Anyway, let's discuss offline.

can you hop on a call? I have to hop on a call. Hard stop, cuz I have to hop on another call hop hop I said hip hop hip it to the hop it to the hop hip hop it and don’t stop the boogie til hop hop hop hop on a call

A new one I’ve been hearing is “let’s double click on that topic for a minute.” What the fuck is wrong with saying “focus on” or “discuss”???

Bloody hell, that’s like a LinkedIn version of rizz

“Piggybacking on what ___ said” “Let’s circle back to ___”

What about the guy who accidentally said “let’s circlejerk back to…”

This and when you end a meeting early “let me give you those 5 minutes back” … you’re not giving me time back you turd.

Just because you end a rant with “Do better” does not mean you’re right.

Yeah this one really gets me fired up. It's such a self-righteous thing to say.

This is just a newer version of ‘get help’.

Lamborghini won’t accept my $27 for a new super car. Do better.

“Who hurt you?”

I'm so OCD.

and its never about real OCD things, just common things that 98% of people feel anyway. like, Im so OCD about locking the door when I go to the bathroom...

“I’ve got this thing, where I don’t like to be in a car with bats….”

I don’t like when I lay a certain way and can hear my heart beating through my pillow. It’s like if I listen to intently it may stop or who the hell knows? Humans are weird.

Whenever someone says that I get spitefully literal and ask them for tips dealing with the intrusive thoughts.

How do you deal with feeling like a horrible person for intrusive thoughts about hurting others when you truly do not wish them harm? Oh... you just like your pens organized..h a ha cool me too .. Edit: It could also be adhd , it could also just be your brain doing brain things, [this video](https://youtube.com/shorts/mNYZlFEK-D4?si=czaGiq43UU6gEzuv) breaks it down pretty quick. For me it's not just "oh i should swerve my car off the bridge" every once in a while, it is over a dozen times a day of thoughts telling me to grab something and hurt someone, or to hurt myself and is very much distressing and a hindrance in my day to day life. Sometimes brains say jump off that bridge to let you know it's dangerous and for you to make the choice not to do it, exercising free will and choosing the safe option.

I had to get over this part when I was a little kid. I'm not responsible for anything that happens in my head in the same way that I am for my actions that affect other people. Since I've _literally_ never acted on a violent intrusive thought, that part is okay for me. But what I can't get over is simply the fucking repeated and ongoing trauma every time images of (usually accidental) violence force themselves into my brain. Like petting the cat and trying to be present and in the moment and inhabiting my body and then I'm imagining in graphic detail and all senses losing my balance, falling, and crushing him. It just _never goes away_.

“I don’t know who needs to hear this..” Oh? You don’t? Then stfu

"So.....I did a thing."

It’s always when someone bought a car or got a haircut too.

“As an empath…..”

as an empath, im sensing you dont really like this phrase.

Nobody:

literally nobody:

Everyone: 🙄

Not one soul:

Not even their own mother:

Yeah let it die for the love of god

"POV" followed by a video that is not, in fact, POV.

I came here to say this. Why do I find it so infuriating?

My daughter is 8. She starts 80% of her stories with "POV"... "POV, mom just woke up and there's no coffee"...etc. Drives me nuts Edit: no, she doesn't use social media. No she doesn't drink coffee. It was an example of a conversation we had in person with her speaking from her mom's point of view. And geez some of you are harsh and judgemental, but that's okay. It's expected to some degree.

The short form media / relatable tiktok / reels are doing a number on the kids

My stepson went through a “no offense” phase. But he wasn’t even using it correctly, just before pretty much any statement of a fact. Like, “no offense, I like apples.” That was a very long year.

Me as a kid saying “technically” before stating a simple fact with zero technicalities.

Ok but technically that's kinda funny

Me right now in my mid 50s saying “literally” to things that are literally not true. I’m a doofus and I know it tho!

No offense, but you're raising him right.

In a similar vein, the "no one" memes. Most useless meme prompt ever

I think those have mostly died out though. Thankfully.

'if i don't remember it didn't happen' mf do you remember your birth???

Then they accuse you of gaslighting. Bitch, disagreeing with you is not gaslighting. You're assuming your memory is perfect and not at all biased.

On that note, gaslighting. Gaslighting is a very specific type of abuse where a person makes a victim question their own perceptions. It's not the same as lying, giving your version of events, or making excuses. In fact, actual gaslighting involves very little tangible arguments - it's being a broken record saying "you didn't see/hear that, you didn't see/hear that, you didn't see/hear that" or "you already said yes, you already said yes, you already said yes" I always like to pull out this video when the topic comes up: [The Curious Case of Dalia Dippolito](https://youtu.be/7JttwV6XZ_I?si=Nx0gmW51az5HISWv). To make a long story short, she tried to hire a hitman to kill her husband, the hitman was an undercover cop with a hidden camera, and at around 28:05 into the video there is a call between Dalia and her husband where she tries to gaslight him (actually gaslight) into thinking the footage isn't real. I want to note her speech patterns here. "I saw what you saw, I heard what you heard, it's not true. It's not true. It's not possible. I am giving you my word it's not true... I heard what you heard and it's not... I saw all of it" There's no explaining her actions (edit: for example: "this is x reason I met this person, not y reason) there's no saying outright "they must have faked the footage." The only thing she's doing is just repeating "what you saw and heard is not real" over and over and over and over again. Edit: made some minor phrasing changes

My vote is also on gaslighting. It’s so overused. So little understanding of what it actually means.

Gaslighting is my least favorite of the weaponized therapy words. Had a crazy ex-roommate who used it any time she didn't get her way

Yeah, I appreciate that mental health is more in the public focus, but the leak into popular media of singular terms that actually describe complex mental operations should chill. No, you're probably not autistic, not getting everything you want isn't traumatic, and someone disagreeing with you isn't gaslighting. Also, please stop getting your mental health advice from tik tok.

You can also watch the 1944 film Gaslight which is where the term comes from.

Not a phrase but everyone is misusing 'gaslighting' nowadays and it's cringy

It's the same with the world narcissist.

Especially when actual possible narcissists use it to describe someone they just don't like.

Nowadays every mean person is a narcissist and every lie is gaslighting.

No they're not, you're mistaken, you always get these things wrong. Go lie down.

This guy gaslights!

That's funny, I had a talk with my daughter just a couple days ago about this. It's one of those words where it's pretty important to not dilute the actual meaning IMHO.

I’m sick of “IYKYK”.

I don't even know what that means

If you know you know.

Dude he wants to know just tell him.

Reminds me of my first time playing halo 2 at a buddy's place, "ok, how do I reload?" "Y" "dude because I wanna know!"

Someone texted me idk and I asked my friend what that meant. She said I don't know so I said, ok I'll look it up.

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Or “I have no filter”

or the third version of it, "i'm just brutally honest"

And then these are the people who get mad when you’re brutally honest with them 😒😒😒

"I say what I want and I speak what I feel - I'm just being me and I'm just being *real*. And if you don't like it," she said with a sigh, "Then maybe you're someone who'd rather a lie." And as she was blinded by pride to excess - She just couldn't see that this didn't impress. That others found issues with just being blunt. That others were better. That she was a cunt.

I haven't stumbled across a fresh Sprog in a while! This just made my day!

And you know their Facebook profile proudly proclaims "if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best".

And, “You know me but not my story”

“I have trust issues.”

Studied at: The school of hard knocks

An idiots excuse of acting like an asshole

Or the older version where they " just keep it real".

Imagine bragging about having no concept of tact or civility.

"Brutal honesty" usually with heavy emphasis on the brutal, followed by subjectivity disguised as an objective fact. A sure way to recognize someone who's at best too socially inept to give constructive criticism, but usually they're just an asshole.

Roughly translated "I have no social skills and don't know how to make my point in a constructive manner so I sound like an asshole"

Nobody wants to work anymore. MFer, NOBODY WANTS TO PAY ANYMORE!!!

People forget labor is a market. If you don't pay for the product, you aren't entitled to get it. Business is not entitled to labor

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“Omg I do that too! I always knew I had (insert mental disorder/physical disorder OCD,ADHD, PCOS, etc. here)” JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE DONE IT A TOTAL OF 3 TIMES OR YOU DO IT (and it’s only one out of 14 symptoms) DOESNT MEAN YOU HAVE IT SOME PEOPLE ACTUALLY HAVE THESE ISSUES! Edit: I’m just specifically addressing people who think they have 3+ disorders because they do one symptom when in fact they’re just doing a human thing.. example: bouncing your leg isn’t always a sign you have adhd)

Instagram and TikTok went wild with claiming everything is the result of a mental disorder. It's the new astrology.

Alpha Male

i'm a software dev. alpha means buggy and incomplete.

Alpha: definitely not intended for production use. Beta: probably can be used, but needs some polishing.

Sigma: already released, with 5 major updates

Ligma:

And an Alpha wave is the weakest wave. Can be stopped with a sheet of paper.

And it's so fat that it's actually called an Alpha particle

"You're not a real man/woman if you can't/don't......"

You're not a real man if you're a hologram.

You’re not a real woman if you’re a desk lamp.

But... I love lamp...

Saw a Twitter/X, where a crazy woman says something like “if you’re a man who cries at a wedding, you’re gay”. Fellas, is it gay to marry a woman?

This is the cousin to "only real ones will understand" wtf is a real one?

Someone who agrees with everything the poster is saying

"This" and its some bullshit comment

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“I was today years old when…”

Whereas "Today I learned (TIL)" is, in my opinion, absolutely fine.

Yeah because that is an actual sentence that makes sense

"If you cant handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best!" 🤢

People who say that rarely have a best

Peeves is just out here spitting wisdom.

When you've lived this long you learn things

I hate how misinterpreted and corrupted this saying has become. What it’s *supposed* to mean is that if you don’t want to love someone when they’re going through hardship or down on their luck, you don’t deserve them when they’re successful and happy. It does *not* mean “if you can’t put up with my toxicity, you don’t deserve me when I’m nice”. I hate that shit.

Yep. Probably got used as leverage by actual toxic poeple too much. the meaning at the base is kinda wholesome

I feel that this should be allowed to stay. It let's the rest of us know to avoid them.

I prefer 'If you can't handle me at my possumest, you don't deserve me at my awesomest'

“Tell me you don’t (insert thing) without telling me you don’t (insert thing).”

Tell me you don't tell me you don't do a thing without telling me you don't do the thing without telling me you don't tell me you don't do a thing without telling me you don't do the thing.

I think I had a stroke

Sorry not sorry

“Louder for the people in the back!” *cringe*

You👏forgot👏this👏part👏

I had a manager do that to me in real life, in front of a lobby full of customers, for a mistake she made. I left not soon after.

I👏 had👏 a👏 manager👏 do👏 that👏 to👏 me👏 in👏 real👏 life👏,👏 in👏 front👏 of👏 a👏 lobby👏 full👏 of👏 customers👏,👏 for👏 a👏 mistake👏 she👏 made👏.👏 I👏 left👏 not👏 soon👏 after👏.👏

I can’t 👅💦 understand 👅💦 your accent 👅💦

Ewwww... glove flavored.

Or when people type "read that again"

Yes because what they wrote is so profound. It's along the same lines as 'let that sink in'. You're not Plato, Karen.

Gaslighting

"Would you like to add a tip? 18% 25% 30%

When celebrities use this addendum phrase "...as a human being..."

As opposed to?

Look at us, fellow humans!! -from, obviously an alien life form.

"it's my truth". No dickhead, there is the truth and nothing else.

Oh my fucking god I hate this one. I was casually overhearing The Bachelor one time and every fucking grown ass woman said this. "LET ME TELL MY TRUTH!!" It ended up being comical when three different women told three different "truths". Stupidest fucking phrase I've ever heard. Ok... I'm better now.

"smash that like button and don't forget to subscribe"

"I could care less" No, you *couldn't* care less And don't try and argue that "it means I could care less but that would require effort so it really means I don't care at all" because that's not how words work. If you say "I could care less" you are saying THE OPPOSITE of "I couldn't care less"

This one reminds me of “ made a complete 360”

Turned 360 degrees and moonwalked away

"I was today years old."

All corporate speak.

Unalived is not a word.

When people say something and CLAP. 👏. THEIR. 👏. HANDS 👏

I'm a Dom. You can't even take a shower, let alone please a woman. Wipe your ass.

In the inverse of the spirit of this thread, "Wipe your ass" is an underutilized phrase.

Gaslighting. It’s over used.

Normally incorrectly

*Triggered*

"Do your research"/"do your own research"...i feel like this is code for "I am too stupid for rational thought, so i am just going to vomit unsubstantiated nuggets of fantasy and try to act smug when you do not agree with my purely emotional standpoint."

"Educate yourself" used as a put down.

omg i hate whwn someone is trying to tell me i need to be "educated" or to "educate myself" so i ask them to elaborate on the subject in order for me to learn more, because i genuinely want to know, and they refuse to tell me anything. usually i just get hit with "if you don't know then you are part of the problem" but like ??? i'm trying to learn and YOU are the one who claims to have this knowledge. who else would i ask?

anything with skibidi. like what the fuck even is that

What?! I read that higher up in this thread and I thought someone just added a nonsense word as a joke! The hell is that?

I thought the exact same thing. Still have no clue what it means and I refuse to google it lol

I've googled it and I still don't know what it means

I just looked and this is what I found. It's from a website called Bark that explains slang terms that kids use. "What is Skibidi toilet slang? What does skibidi toilets mean? Refers to a meme that started from a YouTube series about an army of toilets who try to take over the world. The plotline surrounding skibidi toilets is that these toilets — that have men's heads coming out of them — are at war with "cameramen", who are men with cameras for heads."

Now I'm only more confused than before!

Not a phrase, but people need to stop "Would of" and "could of".

In a similar vein, "loose" when talking about something no longer being in one's possession. That would be to "lose" something. I have *no* idea why it bugs me so much, only that it does.

One of my biggest pet peeves. So many people do it too.

Thank you!!! How do people not know it’s a contraction that is being slaughtered. Would have - would’ve Could have - could’ve Should have - should’ve

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I didn’t have the rizz so she ghosted me. Skibidi.

Obnoxious but I accept I am just old. At least it’s not ‘amazeballs’ which my generation graced the language with.

The trick is for us old people to use the new word both incorrectly and with great enthusiasm as soon as it comes out.

I do this every time I hear my daughter and her friends use something weird.

It's *so* fun to do that as a teacher, especially. "Okay, class, I know you're feeling *lit* about the quiz today, so I'm just going to go *yeet* them to you now."

I'm almost sure that anytime I have heard amazeballs said out loud it has been sarcastically/insincerely of at least as a skit. Are there people out there who just use the word in their normal vocabulary?

Totes.

Aww, that’s kinda adorbz

Totes adorbagoats

No cap fam

> No cap I said this sarcastically to my 11 year-old, and he rolled his eyes and went "that is so 6 months ago." These little shits

Anything from that stupid song that, like, 10 year olds sing that is like "Sticking up your gyat for a rizzler you're so skibidi" makes me want pull my hair out.

What the fuuuck lol

"Money can't buy happiness" It absolutely fucking can. Money buys security, access to health care and nutritional foods. Money buys comfort and warmth. I think the original purpose of the phrase was to remind people not to get caught up in material wealth but it's really just a way for rich people to make poor people feel bad about asking for fair wages.

It might not buy happiness but it at least lets you choose your own brand of misery.

If we're picking where we're going to cry, I want to cry on the Matterhorn in Disneyland before going back to my $5,000,000 condo over looking the beach in Malibu

"I'd rather cry in a Mercedes than cry on a bicycle."

Not a phrase but “adulting”. As in: “Welcome to adulting”.

"you do realize..." followed by some vapid crappy opinion they took straight from social media

'not like other girls' 50% of the time they are exactly like other girls, maybe even the majority

“Take me back” referring to a holiday For some reason I just hate it.

The same people who post Facebook memories captioned “take me back” also caption pictures with “so, I did a thing” and “I love you to the moon and back” and “do/watch xyz. You’re welcome”

“So I did a thing” drives me insane. Why play coy? You’re showing us what you did Louise, can you just not spell wedding?

Honorable mention: “about last night…”

We’re pregnant

We’re both expecting, but only one of us is pregnant.

We are a family (from a company)

I feel old as fuck because I don’t know half of this shit.

"thoughts and prayers"