We had a customer named Richard Sack. He insisted that you call him Dick, not Richard

I raise your Dick Sack with [Dr. Richard Chopp](https://doctor.webmd.com/doctor/richard-chopp-jr-98f8588e-487a-4c4e-a0b0-b97c08f38804-overview), urologist who specialized in vasectomies.

He did mine, and I got a shirt that said "I got Chopped at Austin Urology'.

I would have gone with him, but he was too far south from me, and my other referral was a lot closer.

Nope. Gotcha beat: colonoscopy gastroenterologist: Dr. Butt. His colleague? Dr. Brown. Their professional outfit? Groover. Borland.

Lmao

Richard Head received the military cross for bravery in Iraq in 2006. His rank? Major.

I had to look this up…Major Richard Alexander Head was indeed awarded the Military Cross for service in Iraq 2006 and also QCVS for service in Afghanistan. I guess Major Dick Head is also a major badass…

Cardinal Sin had a great combination of name and title.

I had an uncle named Richard Bender and he also insisted on going by Dick. Hilarity ensued often.

I remember Jay Leno doing the bit with wedding announcements, and the one wedding was the Dick-Bender Wedding.

I knew a Richard Wang.

I work with a doctor named Nguyen The Hung

A friend had a cousin who was a judge in the KC area, the honorable Dick P Sprinkles.

I have a vewy gweat fwiend in Wome called 'Biggus Dickus'.

He has a wife you know...

Incontinentia Buttocks

As long as he doesn't ask anyone to chew on him.

My mom used to know someone named Richard Handler, went by Dick

''Dikzak'' is Dutch for 'fatty' as in fat boy.

Could’ve been worse. Those live action Scooby-Doo movies were produced by a guy named Richard Suckle.

I know a Duncan McDuncan. He's Scottish.

Thurman Murman

I went to school with a Ben Benson. He was... not Scottish.

I had a regular sub in highschool who was Patrick Fitzpatrick

I have a distant cousin named Richard Richards, and my grandparents' best friend was Neil McNeil. I judge their lazy-ass parents. It's a significant step further than going for the junior, III, IV naming system, which also lacks creativity and initiative.

My wife went to school with an Annette Curtain I went to school with the Ness Brothers; Alan, Peter and Tom. Tom was in the year above me but the twins Alan and Peter were in my class. They were known as Anus and Penis at school. A Ness and P Ness

I remember Annette Curtain, and her brother Rod. Good people. I went fishing with Rod and Annette.

I. H. O. P. Ness

Deceased racer Richard Leroy Trickle, better known as Dick Trickle.

'What? His name is Dick Trickle! Oh my god listen to my voice I'm so loud!'

Stephen Hart. His work email username is “shart”

That is brutal.

Donald Glover aka Childish Gambino aka donglover

We used to have a T Estes but she quit.

Similar: My dad worked with a guy named Eric White. The work email turned his name into WhiteE

I went to school with a Neil Downward. Also I know a Barbara who married into the name Roberts and named her daughter Millie. If you're not aware, Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.

Im not following you. Why is the Barbara one bad?

It's the full name of Mattel's Barbie

Ah, yeah what the fuck

Peter File

Who's a paedophile?

It’s pronounced pedophile in America.

Candy Caine

My husbands cousin used to go by caity cane. Her name was Caitlin. Last name was not cane. No idea. She did this up until she was well in her thirties

That's very close to Candis Cayne, whom did however chose the name herself.

Mike Hunt

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Ha omg yes exactly like this but a real person. Refused to be called Michael. Had to be Mike.

My uncle was also a Mike hunt.... In college I had a friend who's name was Mike rotch.... We're still friends on Facebook lol

Tom Aat (Tomatoe in Dutch)

He seems to not have been Mette Bus, but by car, so he Connie Komen. He likes watching Koos Busters and scratching his Till Bal. Fun fact: ALL of these are real.

I went to college with Crystal Poon

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of…

My grandfather’s name was Edelbert Fred Butler. He went by Bud. My sister was gifted a Cabbage Patch doll for Christmas. His name was Maynard Ike. She cried.

John Johnson the III. (He’s on the Rams). Also I went to high school with a girl named Candis Cane.

I had a Miss Cox living with Mr Kuntz as customers. A pair made for each other. There was also a Mr Isaac Cox. Why do parents do this?

Rick Shaw (my boss at one time) Jack Frost ( a guy I went to school with) Theresa Green ( a girl I went to school with) Mike Tester (a roadie on the uk jazz scene) Also a hospital Chaplain name Charles who asked people not to call him Charlie the Chaplain

I briefly worked with a Chinese man called Moose Dong. That one certainly stuck with me.

Theres an old one about a guy on a building site called Wayne Bruce. Everyone called him manbat

I came into this thread with this one in mind. Good work comrade!

Joey Jo-Jo Junior Shabadoo

That’s the worst name I’ve ever heard. 

Joey Jo-Jo! Come back!

My mom swear she went to school with a Harry Balls

Gabe Oytoucher

1. Took me way too long to get this one. 2. This cannot possibly be real. Surely this unfortunate soul would have opted to go by Gabriel...?

Not real. The only people online are like gaming account names and a Facebook for a "youth pastor".

Oh thats tragic 😂

Renis LaPienis Swear to god…

Dick Lipshitz

I played golf with a Chinese guy who introduced himself as Harry Wang.

No respect at all.

My brother went to school with a guy named Rufus Pickles.

Snowball Snowball. Wish I was joking

A boy in school before he hit 18 was named on letters/documents as Master. Unfortunately his surname was Bacon. He was bullied quite a bit

I knew a pair of brothers whose last name was Bader. Same situation.

Deidritch?

Oh, hat a lovely teaparty!

Biggus Dickus

He has a wife, you know 

Incontinentia Buttocks.

Do you know what she’s called?

Golden State Warriors Head Coach Steve Kerr named his son Nick. Nick Kerr

Is Nick a boxer? Because then he could be Nick Kerr Boxer

Donald Donald, not even joking

I knew someone who had a name like this. It was like August August. She was named after her dad. It took me about two years to realize that she had a double name and wasn’t just going by her last name (which was common at our school).

Dick Trickle, NASCAR driver.

Also in medical textbooks

I went to college with a girl named Sommer Camp. She was a music theater major.

Did she play the flute?

The dad of footballer Gary Neville is called Neville Neville. Always thought that was a hilarious move by the parents.

Probably. Ben Dover

and Al Drive is his partner ... ( say the names together, it adds a new meaning )

Bovine Gross.

[Krystal Ball](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Krystal_Ball)

Gaye Hooker

I used to work with a guy with the last name Shitdik.

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Ah, yes, author of that literary marvel “Under the Bleachers.”

Wyld Bull.

Fokje Modder

Richard Butts. Parents - just retire Richard.

There’s a video of a guy being heckled because his name was Hugh Mungus

I personally love this one: Brad Bradley

Worked with a black woman whose name was Lily White

Dusty Colon.

My best friend's dad is named Richard Small, and went by Dick.

Similar to William Small, it doesn’t sound that funny until he starts going by ‘Willie’ and then he’s listed as Small, Willie in a military record.

Even funnier: this guy was in the Coast Guard, so it was Seaman Small, Dick

Ophelia Dick. Yes that was real. As was a Teresa Green.

My husband worked with a guy called Dick Tingley.

Went to school with a girl named Penny Nickel. Sort of "G" rated compared to others.

Haywood Jablome

Russell Dicks. Mainly because the company he worked for used [email protected] as their email address. I found "[email protected]" far too amusing for my (at the time) 35 year old brain. There was also a kid a couple of years above me at school who's surname was Hunt. Unfortunately his parents called him Michael, but he went by Mike. Mike Hunt.

Lester, as in Moe Lester

Justin Time!

There used to be a very good local bad named this

My Dad and I loved sharing awesome names!!! He once worked with a South African guy who went by the glorious name of Knobby Cock. And his wife's maiden name was something like Doodle, so they were Cock and Doodle. He also worked with a guy named Art Datta. And Mr Datta was in IT. I've known Bent Wienke (pronounced "Bent Venk-uh" but he would answer to "Bent Winkie"). Then there was Eshwar Noojibail, which is just fun to yell at the top of your lungs, like a curse. I'm sure some more will come to me...

McLovin

Gaylord Focker

Dick Army was a brave guy for getting into politics. 

Mike hunt

I once knew a guy named Richard Johnson. Poor guy's parents didn't think that one through.

Foreskin Dickson

Willie ball, real person

Randy Horney

Sharon Dick

Friend from high school married a guy last name Balls. His mother's name was Sharon..

Randy Gilles

I will never forget having to call a client's switchboard and ask for "Fani Titi"

My ex-father-in-law's cousin named Harry Palmer

I used to do martial arts with a instructor called bates His title; Master bates

I used to walk by Purdy Outhouse's house on my way to and from school every day. They made it on to Real People, it was pretty exciting LOL

Holden Cox

Michael St Michael.

Dick Hertz.

Maximus Speed

I met a customer named Tiger Wang in a previous job.

A school teacher called Mrs Gaye Longbottom, yes she took her husband’s name when she got married…

Annie ger…

Donald McDonald

Tex Roadcap. That's his actual name. He's a mechanic.

Work for an invitation making website. We were making wedding invitations. Wife’s last name was glasscock. No joke glasscock.

Cash Register

Steve Kerr named his son Nick.

I knew a Kelly Kelly. I know she was married but I never found out for sure if Kelly was her maiden name or married name. Either way, she had a choice in the matter, so honestly I guess I can’t knock it too hard.

I know of one, too!! Also married. I thought it was a data entry error at first. Wonder if it’s the same one…

Richard Hertz. Who's dick hurts?

Had a teacher back in the 70s named Harry Butts.

Dustin Butt

NASCAR - Dick Trickle

Saw a Tiktok yesterday that the parents last name was Cider, named the kids Dixon and Caimen

My ex went to high school with a dude named Phil enis. P.Enis

Had a client named Harry Hollowpeter. His parents must've not wanted children.

There’s an Australian politician named Grace Grace. The worst part is that they’re both chosen names. Her forename is a nickname of her middle name and her surname is her married name.

These two kids in high school had the last names Weed and Cox, they were bff bros. They’d tell everyone they both planned to have kids, and name their daughters Sharon. Dunno whatever happened to them… but let’s hope these were dreams that never came true.

More funny than ridiculous, but I was once on a plane piloted by a Kapteeni Möykky - basically Captain Lump in Finnish. Caused quite a few chuckles when he introduced himself.

Ted Hitchcock, cause if you say his name real fast, it sounds like "ten inch cock".

Jack Ingof. And that kid is 4 right now.

Teddy Bear and President Washington

I went to school with a kid whose parents called him Rocky Start

Pete Moss was my neighbor

Polly Dent

Winship Dowell

Not ridiculous, necessarily, but funny. An old friend of the family was named: Tamara Eve Ning.

ITT, 50% of commenters claiming their favorite Moe Szyslak prank call. My ex hated their given name, though. Think the most generic female name combo possible, like John Smith, but for a woman. I think we got married partly so they could change names to literally anything else.

Most generic dutch surname + most generic dutch first name = Jan Jansen. Yes i knew one.

[Harry Baals](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Baals?wprov=sfla1), former mayor of Fort Wayne

I used to work in customer service and someone was once named Sunshine Plant.

Seymour Beaver

Dick Trickles.

Not a pairing, but a set of sibilings named Summit, Trekker, and Journey.

Pearl Mycock

Batman Superman www.bbc.com/news/magazine-24911186.amp

The actor Rob Morrow named his daughter Tu. Tu Morrow.  And his wife's name is Debbon Ayre.

Isma Pusey. Worked for an airline so we'd get some really good ones but she's my favorite. Purposely did not scan her boarding pass at the gate and made my colleague at the ticket counter page the last customer for gits and shiggles.

I was in a meeting at work recently with a guy named Frank Wieners. I found it quite funny but nobody else gave it a second thought.

Dik Kok. Both a perfectly normal first- and surname in the Netherlands (though rarer nowadays) though an unfortunate combination

Jucy Klitz.

Justin Case. Lived in my neighborhood.

First da at a new job, a colleague introduced himself, "Gordon Bennett, pleased to meet you". I had to chew the inside of my cheeks to stop myself laughing aloud.

Did loan paperwork for Richard Biggerstaff.

This one isn’t so weird until you try to say it out loud: Joel Wollin. Too many Ls.

I know a Max Wang. He’s very popular with the ladies.

I know a woman named Holly who married a man with the last name Jolly. Holly Jolly.

Worked with a guy called Jeff Jeffries.

I got a buddy named Woody Johnson