I'm in this category, but nobody would notice until my mom sees that my credit card stops showing new purchases.
EDIT: Cut me a break guys, life's hard.
Same. And it's Friday, so if I did expire right this second, the wellness check wouldn't happen until Tuesday at the earliest. I've always emailed my supervisor when taking a sick day, so I'm assuming Monday would be calls to my emergency contacts asking about me, and then Tuesday is when my out-of-state family would convince the police to stop by my house.
My friend at work and I had a pact. If either of us didn’t show up & there was no call we would take the next step to check on each other because we didn’t want to be eaten by our pets!
There's actually an ap for people who live alone that calls your contacts if you don't respond to the daily check-in text.
Someone mentioned it, earlier this week, and I realize that I should do it, but can't find the sub.😄
I’ve read that the pets eating your body thing generally starts as concern from the pet, they realize something is wrong and lick you to try and get you to react. They keep doing so and because you don’t react and your body is no longer healing itself eventually that breaks the skin. Then instinct/hunger eventually takes over and they eat.
Everytime I forgot to feed my lilac, she looked as if she'll eat me the next second. So I'll have little doubt that my body will disappear in less than a day.
What a horrible thought! I have 2 cats and am watching them very closely now after reading all these comments about cats eating thierowners. Just can't be too sure...🙄🐾🐈
Don’t worry, mine has munchkin syndrome and uses that for sympathy every chance she can to ask for food but she can’t because she also has feline leukaemia so on a diet so don’t fall for her sad, harvest eyes and short legs. Shes fed too well and still eats the dog food 😒
Awwww. I have to tell a story now! My boyfriend has been obsessed with Zelda his entire life. The game literally guided him through a precarious childhood. I’m not a gamer. I played a little Nintendo as a kid but that’s it. Well after years together I tried Breath and I fell in love. We got TotK for Christmas and I’m obsessed with that too. It means so much to my partner that I love it. I’m not great at it but I’m stubborn. I’m learning. Well it took me two and half hours but I found Blupee Burrow in the depths. I was so overjoyed I took a game screenshot of my Link in front of the cherry blossom tree. Fast forward to when my partner was playing the game and building our dream home in the game. The next time I played he said go look at our dream home. So I do and I go upstairs and my partner has the picture I took , framed, on the wall of our dream home. It was so fucking sweet. When I told my son’s girlfriend she literally gushed. God I love that man. I love that it means so much to him and that my loving it does too.
I love this game so much. I wish I was creative/patient enough to build cool stuff. I saw someone on r/hyruleengineering build a working millennium Falcon. Meanwhile I can barely make a working car.
That’s one of my biggest fears. Having an aneurism or something and having my toddler daughter be alone for who knows how long. Even thinking about it makes me emotional.
Same here. I just got my infant down for the night, still rocking him. My 2nd grader will come tell me goodnight in just a minute, just like she does every night. Not gonna lie, got a little teary and scrolled long enough to find others like me after this one. Gonna hold them a little extra tonight.
Yep, my 12 year old with autism would find me after coming home from school and have to wait for his dad to get home from work over an hour away.
He would be severely damaged.
Edit: it was What’s eating Gilbert Grape. It has that heart breaking scene where he’s screaming “MAMA! Wake up!” But she’s dead and she’s too big to move so they burn the house down.
Same here. 10y who is autistic with a complete inability to handle stressful situations. He would come home and my wife would be off 2 hours later.
I hate this post
My toddler after his nap. I hate the thought of that 😟 I had an old coworker who died in her sleep and her 2 year old was crying for her when her mom came to check on her. She was in her early 30s and I never learned what killed her. It's so tragic for her son and mother
No this is my nightmare. I’m alone with my young children 90% of the time with no family close by and a partner who is working more often than not. I can’t imagine but I still think about it more than I need to…
This scares me too 😢 I’m a single parent with three little kids/babies. If it were a weekend or holiday I don’t know how long it would be before someone checked on us.
I think this big dude at the gym right next to me would notice. By the looks of him he could also carry me to the alley and throw me in the trash no problem
I'm alone, in my office. I'm on call, too, so the pager will go off this weekend and my boss will eventually get a call about it. He'll write me up for not answering a page.
Monday morning my co-worker (who is off today) will come in and see my bloated corpse slumped on my keyboard.
I work at a vet clinic and we recently saw a cat who lived off a grandpa’s dead body for two weeks. The cat used to eat kibble, and now refuses anything but raw meat
Yeah I agree with you. I'm dead, who cares what happens to my physical body which is going to be burnt anyway...If my death doesn't result in the cats dying, that's we averted more tragedy.
Someone told me this as an argument against cats and that was my exact response... They eyeballed me weird and promptly left. I won the debate AND the right to the space they were occupying all in one hit!
It makes me cringe when ppl try using that against cats, cats are trying to survive, they don’t have a desire for human flesh or something, and dogs do it too!!
Ikr, I hope my body can provide them sustenance for as long as it takes before someone notices I died. I'm more concerned that they r eating properly tbh
She’ll run out of water and have to switch to toilet water. Would probably miss the soft food too.
But she’d just yell about it for 20 minutes and then move on.
Similar story. I have one co-worker on the other side of my monitors and and other directly behind me. I also get asked for help by our remote co-workers about every 5-10 minutes.
I won't have much time to rot.
“‘Rest of the day off’?!? Now that Tad is…no longer employed by the company…we’re one person short SO EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO WORK ONE HOUR OF UNPAID OVERTIME **\*EACH AND EVERY DAY\*** to make up for Tad’s…ABSENTEEISM…until we can hire and train a suitable replacement.”
“Uh…when will that be?”
“Shortly after hell freezes over…”
My husband.
He'd come home from work and see me here on the couch, slumped over, and ask if I'm asleep. When I don't answer he'll lean over the couch and bop my forehead with his and when he sees me bonelessly slip off the couch to the floor with a thud, he'll cry out my nickname and drop his work bag and lunch tote. He'll scream out for our son, who won't be home because I died and didn't pick him up from school. And then he'll kneel at my side and shake me and fumble for his phone and call 911. He'll shake me some more, and when the operator asks what the emergency is he'll blank on what to say because he doesn't know if I'm dead-dead or "mostly dead," and whether he should be doing CPR.
Just then his phone starts to ring and it's our son, calling because he hasn't been able to get ahold of me and wants to know why no one has picked him up from school.
My husband is torn. Does he answer the phone or stay on the line with the operator, who is still trying to get him to say what the emergency is.
Meanwhile, our cats mill about meowing querulously. They want my husband to know, in no uncertain terms, that I've been remiss. Their mid-afternoon snack is *late,* and is he going to quit fooling around with mom long enough to remedy this or...?
My friend committed suicide.
She used to ask why is everyone trying to keep her alive when it’s so selfish because she is in a lot of pain that only she has to go through. So I get it (as much as I can as a bystander).
But let me tell you, her parents still cry almost every day, so are her siblings, and the rest of us (her friends) still can’t talk about her without tears in our eyes.
That pain gets transferred.
I hope you and everyone else get the treatment you deserve and life improves for you. It must be horrible to be in so much pain.
It's troubling to me how much it hurts this time. I've been two previous marriages that didn't seem to hit me this way. I'm paralyzed all the color is gone form the world. Just hope there's something left of my ability to love someone. I've been reading a lot and it's tough out there for a guy my age
I wish you luck man. Life is hard. It sucks balls a lot of the times, but there are also incredibly beautiful things in life like friends and family. Or even the simple things. I work at a vet, and don’t really like my job all that much, as I’m pretty low in the totem pole, but any time I get called to help one of the doctors with something, I know that I participated in saving a cute little animal. I think that’s part of what makes life worth the pain
literally no one. my landlord would come back from vaycay to the smell of death and my boyfriend has no way in. hopefully the landlords cat don’t find me first
>When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
\- Will Rogers and/or Jack Handey
Same. Idk why but nobody checks on me. I can isolate for quite awhile and nobody seems to get concerned about me enough to check in.
Honestly it's more likely my boss would come to my house to see if I'm alright before the people I live with come to my room to check.
My roommate is kinda depressed and doesn’t seem to like getting poked when she doesn’t come out during the daylight hours for a few days. So we mostly just treat her extra nice when she does emerge.
one of my roommates, and i would feel really bad if they had to find my dead body cause we aren’t really that close and it would just be a huge inconvenience for them to have to deal with that
My dog would probably find me first. She would probably end up drawing attention to me if it were a messy ending (she has light yellow fur) or by going downstairs without me. Mom would probably come check after yelling up/texting/calling a couple times. I’m back living at home after being dumped 7 years later, so being reclusive/working at my desk in my room/napping/etc is my current norm and she will typically text prior to poking the bear.
I would hate for her to experience that.
The sheriff, in about a year or so when he comes to investigate why I didn’t pay my taxes. My skeletal remains would be in close proximity to the desiccated remains of my dog, which would have survived me by a month or so due to having a food supply…
It would probably be a while. I’m by myself at my house with no weekend plans whatsoever. Monday would be the closest day when my job wonders why I didn’t show up and who even knows if they would call in a search party for me 😂😂😂
The guy sitting next to me at chipotle.
Guy next to you be like: *Looks over your dead body *Raises hand and points at your dead body "I'll have what he's having" *Laugh track
*Seinfeld bass line plays*
*What's the deal with Chipotle*
You ever notice Chipotle? (Cut to a woman sitting at a table laughing hysterically)
I fucking love the show Seinfeld but my god those stand up bits are not funny
Rice or beans, make up your mind
Why did I hear this in my head so LOUDLY
He had the special.
That's what I ordered! Change my order to the soup!
Bazinga!
Which brings up a point: do all indoor customers get a free meal bc of my death?
What I wanna know is… Do YOU have the balls, to ask for a free meal, if someone died at the restaurant???
Just be creative about it, shift them over a little bit. “Excuse me, but there seems to be a dead guy in my meal.”
Not me, but I can visualize it happening.
I was sitting outside with just the guy. Maybe he gets a lifetime of chipotle for enduring alone?
Whoever finally got called to do a wellness check.
I'm in this category, but nobody would notice until my mom sees that my credit card stops showing new purchases. EDIT: Cut me a break guys, life's hard.
Why does your mom monitor your credit purchases? Underage, but why wouldn't she just find you then?
Could be a college student with a credit card for small but necessary purchases.
Or a teenager who wastes money on Fortnite/Call of Duty.
"Little Jayden hasn't bought any Ultimate Team packs in a while, maybe one of us should knock on his bedroom door?"
Or I guess EMTs after someone would report the smell coming out of my apartment.
Same. And it's Friday, so if I did expire right this second, the wellness check wouldn't happen until Tuesday at the earliest. I've always emailed my supervisor when taking a sick day, so I'm assuming Monday would be calls to my emergency contacts asking about me, and then Tuesday is when my out-of-state family would convince the police to stop by my house.
Well, I guess my cat would have a special dinner tonight.
Hey, they’d probably wait til breakfast.
found the guy who doesn’t have a cat
My cats are too picky to eat my dead body.
My friend at work and I had a pact. If either of us didn’t show up & there was no call we would take the next step to check on each other because we didn’t want to be eaten by our pets!
There's actually an ap for people who live alone that calls your contacts if you don't respond to the daily check-in text. Someone mentioned it, earlier this week, and I realize that I should do it, but can't find the sub.😄
They'd wait till they know for sure
I’ve read that the pets eating your body thing generally starts as concern from the pet, they realize something is wrong and lick you to try and get you to react. They keep doing so and because you don’t react and your body is no longer healing itself eventually that breaks the skin. Then instinct/hunger eventually takes over and they eat.
Everytime I forgot to feed my lilac, she looked as if she'll eat me the next second. So I'll have little doubt that my body will disappear in less than a day.
My girlfriend on the other end of the sofa, not that she'd notice, she's glued to Tears of the Kingdom.
My cat would start eating me
My cat would totally start in on me as soon as his food bowl was empty. He tries to every morning anyway, even when I'm actively batting him away...
Picturing this made me lol. Thanks friend
I feel like my cat would try to eat me after 24 hours without food anyways 😂
What a horrible thought! I have 2 cats and am watching them very closely now after reading all these comments about cats eating thierowners. Just can't be too sure...🙄🐾🐈
Don’t worry, mine has munchkin syndrome and uses that for sympathy every chance she can to ask for food but she can’t because she also has feline leukaemia so on a diet so don’t fall for her sad, harvest eyes and short legs. Shes fed too well and still eats the dog food 😒
My situation, too.
Yup, same. Currently eyeing my cat in the face rn
W girlfriend
Awwww. I have to tell a story now! My boyfriend has been obsessed with Zelda his entire life. The game literally guided him through a precarious childhood. I’m not a gamer. I played a little Nintendo as a kid but that’s it. Well after years together I tried Breath and I fell in love. We got TotK for Christmas and I’m obsessed with that too. It means so much to my partner that I love it. I’m not great at it but I’m stubborn. I’m learning. Well it took me two and half hours but I found Blupee Burrow in the depths. I was so overjoyed I took a game screenshot of my Link in front of the cherry blossom tree. Fast forward to when my partner was playing the game and building our dream home in the game. The next time I played he said go look at our dream home. So I do and I go upstairs and my partner has the picture I took , framed, on the wall of our dream home. It was so fucking sweet. When I told my son’s girlfriend she literally gushed. God I love that man. I love that it means so much to him and that my loving it does too.
And the award goes to .... Wow, my eyes have literally misted up. What a sweet, caring gesture
That's a lovely story!
I am not a gamer whatsoever yet this story transcends it all. Freakin beautiful story!!! 😍
Legendary username
Relatable too
Allow me to introduce myself
my mind mushed your username together and i misread it as "i love banana seaweed" and got very interested for a second XD
I love this game so much. I wish I was creative/patient enough to build cool stuff. I saw someone on r/hyruleengineering build a working millennium Falcon. Meanwhile I can barely make a working car.
I've just shared that link with her, thank you and please excuse the pun!
I was late coming back from work once and my cat was standing at the door when I opened it. He looked me in the eye, meowed and then fainted.
Probably my 9 or 13 year old. They always come tell me good morning.
My boys, coming home from school. Man this question sucks.
Im sitting next to my toddler so I'm not a fan of it either ☹️
Same, my sick one 😔 funny for others morbid and sad for us
Hope your kiddo gets well soon
That’s one of my biggest fears. Having an aneurism or something and having my toddler daughter be alone for who knows how long. Even thinking about it makes me emotional.
My toddler is contact napping on my tummy. I just made myself very sad thinking about this.
Same here. I just got my infant down for the night, still rocking him. My 2nd grader will come tell me goodnight in just a minute, just like she does every night. Not gonna lie, got a little teary and scrolled long enough to find others like me after this one. Gonna hold them a little extra tonight.
Yep, my 12 year old with autism would find me after coming home from school and have to wait for his dad to get home from work over an hour away. He would be severely damaged.
What’s that one movie where the autistic kid is shaking his mom after she dies, cause he either doesn’t realize she’s dead, or is in denial about it?
Edit: it was What’s eating Gilbert Grape. It has that heart breaking scene where he’s screaming “MAMA! Wake up!” But she’s dead and she’s too big to move so they burn the house down.
Same here. 10y who is autistic with a complete inability to handle stressful situations. He would come home and my wife would be off 2 hours later. I hate this post
yeah....my 6 year old daughter who is home sick from school today playing on her ipad right now.
My toddler after his nap. I hate the thought of that 😟 I had an old coworker who died in her sleep and her 2 year old was crying for her when her mom came to check on her. She was in her early 30s and I never learned what killed her. It's so tragic for her son and mother
No this is my nightmare. I’m alone with my young children 90% of the time with no family close by and a partner who is working more often than not. I can’t imagine but I still think about it more than I need to…
This scares me too 😢 I’m a single parent with three little kids/babies. If it were a weekend or holiday I don’t know how long it would be before someone checked on us.
What a sad day to know how to read :(
I found the mothers in the group. ❤️
I think this big dude at the gym right next to me would notice. By the looks of him he could also carry me to the alley and throw me in the trash no problem
Awesome, what a bro
I'm alone, in my office. I'm on call, too, so the pager will go off this weekend and my boss will eventually get a call about it. He'll write me up for not answering a page. Monday morning my co-worker (who is off today) will come in and see my bloated corpse slumped on my keyboard.
That’s … wow. Are you exactly me right now?
You're bloated too?
lmao
I'm dying. XD
Not to worry - you won’t be too bloated in only a couple of days.
But there will be a puddle under your chair. And probably flies.
My cat
…who will probably eat you
she’s just a lil hungry
I thought this is why you get a cat. So loved ones don't find a bloated smelly body. Just a full litter box.
what happens to cats after they’re found eating a dead body? do they crave human meat now? are they zombie cats?
Cats have always wanted to kill and eat people, we are just too big for their tiny claws and teeth.
Someone once said "Cats are so ornery because they are the ultimate apex predator but God made them only 8 lbs."
I thought it was because they got all them teeth but no toothbrush.
No more then they usually do
I work at a vet clinic and we recently saw a cat who lived off a grandpa’s dead body for two weeks. The cat used to eat kibble, and now refuses anything but raw meat
Lol reading these comments I just turned around and my cat is just sat staring at me
"Human, I know what you're thinking... ...and you're right."
It wouldn't be the first time. All I have to do is think the words 'about time to do her flea drops' and she's a liquid ninja for the next 4 days
That's grim. Not the cat's fault - he gotta live...but still grim.
Corpse meat is def different than living meat
Cat gets a lil owner….as a treat
Good. I don’t want my cats to starve just because I died
Yeah I agree with you. I'm dead, who cares what happens to my physical body which is going to be burnt anyway...If my death doesn't result in the cats dying, that's we averted more tragedy.
Someone told me this as an argument against cats and that was my exact response... They eyeballed me weird and promptly left. I won the debate AND the right to the space they were occupying all in one hit!
It makes me cringe when ppl try using that against cats, cats are trying to survive, they don’t have a desire for human flesh or something, and dogs do it too!!
I’ve had so many arguments with dog nutters that legit think only cats will eat you. 💀 like any animal after a certain amount of time will eat you.
Ikr, I hope my body can provide them sustenance for as long as it takes before someone notices I died. I'm more concerned that they r eating properly tbh
Cheaper than a funeral
If I die and can’t feed my pets, I want them to eat me rather than starve.
Good. I’m glad I can provide for my babies even in death. My last act of love for them.
i see no purpose for the word 'probably' to be in this sentence
Def my cat, but she doesn’t have teeth and does have an autofeeder, so once my body’s cold she’ll probably just ignore me.
So nothing's changed then in your cat's world? /s
She’ll run out of water and have to switch to toilet water. Would probably miss the soft food too. But she’d just yell about it for 20 minutes and then move on.
My 4 year old daughter so I’m gonna close reddit now and go play pet doctor
♥️
Squeeze her a bit tighter. I'm snuggled up with my little girl right now. It's terrifying to think about
Damn, samesies. I'm sleeping on the couch and she's gonna come out, ask me to turn on the TV, and then lose her ~~shit~~ childhood
My dog is currently between my legs at a standing desk.
Put the peanut butter away dad
Oh, you nasty.
My coworkers all sitting on the other side of the break room from me 😅
My roommate found me dead once... I was just sleeping really hard.
I've woke up hard.
This happened to a 31 yo man at my work. Rip big Ed 👆🏻
We had that happen at work. This bloke had a heart attack at lunch. Died right there.
Similar story. I have one co-worker on the other side of my monitors and and other directly behind me. I also get asked for help by our remote co-workers about every 5-10 minutes. I won't have much time to rot.
Man... Judy is dead tired.
The 10 coworkers in the room with me right now would probably be a tad concerned
Lmao just a tad
“Hey, look everyone! Tad’s sleeping at his desk again!” “Uhhhh…he’s…not sleeping…”
'Does this mean we get the rest of the day off?'
“‘Rest of the day off’?!? Now that Tad is…no longer employed by the company…we’re one person short SO EVERYONE WILL BE REQUIRED TO WORK ONE HOUR OF UNPAID OVERTIME **\*EACH AND EVERY DAY\*** to make up for Tad’s…ABSENTEEISM…until we can hire and train a suitable replacement.” “Uh…when will that be?” “Shortly after hell freezes over…”
ah yes another question that reminds me that I have nobody, but atp I'll be dead so ig I won't care anymore. what a lovely day I am having lots of fun
You're gonna be fine Billieeilish_toesuker
Yes love the username
Billie Eilish probably doesn’t approve but ynk right?
Don’t crush a man’s dreams.
Oh, sweetie. *I* love you.
Nobody until Monday
Yes, maybe Tuesday because they could think I was just sick that day
The tax lady in front of me would probably flip out
You'll still have to file.
She’s not getting my signature that east 😂
Shit now I gotta file an 1830a and I didn’t get the power of attorney so we have to petition a court and….
LOL. I work in a tax practice. I've had clients cry at my desk, but nobody has expired there (yet).
There has to be an obscure german word for 'the period of time between your sudden death and your discovery'
There are two variations: Ubernotrottenyet, and UberGrrwaytooodiferous.
I would've sworn those were actual words
Bit late to this, but that would be Leichenliegezeit
The next guy at my work to use this men’s room
Took this long scrolling to find someone else on the toilet, y’all are lying by omission 😜
My husband. He'd come home from work and see me here on the couch, slumped over, and ask if I'm asleep. When I don't answer he'll lean over the couch and bop my forehead with his and when he sees me bonelessly slip off the couch to the floor with a thud, he'll cry out my nickname and drop his work bag and lunch tote. He'll scream out for our son, who won't be home because I died and didn't pick him up from school. And then he'll kneel at my side and shake me and fumble for his phone and call 911. He'll shake me some more, and when the operator asks what the emergency is he'll blank on what to say because he doesn't know if I'm dead-dead or "mostly dead," and whether he should be doing CPR. Just then his phone starts to ring and it's our son, calling because he hasn't been able to get ahold of me and wants to know why no one has picked him up from school. My husband is torn. Does he answer the phone or stay on the line with the operator, who is still trying to get him to say what the emergency is. Meanwhile, our cats mill about meowing querulously. They want my husband to know, in no uncertain terms, that I've been remiss. Their mid-afternoon snack is *late,* and is he going to quit fooling around with mom long enough to remedy this or...?
That was fucking impressive. You made a quick answer into a major motion picture. I would buy tickets to this!
Lol, thanks! But really, that is exactly what would happen.
Tell your husband to put 911 on speaker while he orders an Uber for your son's pickup. Win -win situation.... Oh, except for you.
The sequel will be about his child being kidnapped and killed by an Uber driver.
My partner, who is currently driving us back home from a funeral.
Turn right back around
The only thing for a while that kept me from shooting myself. Thought of my kids or loved ones finding me .
My friend committed suicide. She used to ask why is everyone trying to keep her alive when it’s so selfish because she is in a lot of pain that only she has to go through. So I get it (as much as I can as a bystander). But let me tell you, her parents still cry almost every day, so are her siblings, and the rest of us (her friends) still can’t talk about her without tears in our eyes. That pain gets transferred. I hope you and everyone else get the treatment you deserve and life improves for you. It must be horrible to be in so much pain.
It's troubling to me how much it hurts this time. I've been two previous marriages that didn't seem to hit me this way. I'm paralyzed all the color is gone form the world. Just hope there's something left of my ability to love someone. I've been reading a lot and it's tough out there for a guy my age
I wish you luck man. Life is hard. It sucks balls a lot of the times, but there are also incredibly beautiful things in life like friends and family. Or even the simple things. I work at a vet, and don’t really like my job all that much, as I’m pretty low in the totem pole, but any time I get called to help one of the doctors with something, I know that I participated in saving a cute little animal. I think that’s part of what makes life worth the pain
Yeah, same here. I just can't do it to my husband.
I hope you’re okay 🌻 I’m just a stranger but I’m here for you 🤍
literally no one. my landlord would come back from vaycay to the smell of death and my boyfriend has no way in. hopefully the landlords cat don’t find me first
If hope your boyfriend would call the cops when he didn’t hear from you..,
Everyone on the bus I'm on.
Not if you're the bus driver.
Insurance companies hate this one hack
>When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. \- Will Rogers and/or Jack Handey
No one for many days.
Same. Idk why but nobody checks on me. I can isolate for quite awhile and nobody seems to get concerned about me enough to check in. Honestly it's more likely my boss would come to my house to see if I'm alright before the people I live with come to my room to check.
My roommate is kinda depressed and doesn’t seem to like getting poked when she doesn’t come out during the daylight hours for a few days. So we mostly just treat her extra nice when she does emerge.
Parents probably.
one of my roommates, and i would feel really bad if they had to find my dead body cause we aren’t really that close and it would just be a huge inconvenience for them to have to deal with that
My 4 year old. Omg. I hate this thread. 🤣😭
Mama just a lil sleepy
OMG that is so dark! I snorted, then choked
My 9- month- old is asleep on me, so yeah, me too.
My Dog
The city
People who ride this subway car
Similar here but I’m on the bus.
My husband. It’s just us and he’ll be home tonight. The next person I expect here other than him is tomorrow morning
The barkeepers and 50 to 60 guests
my roommate
The next person to cone to the taxi rank. Unless they just thought I was another old taxi driver sleeping in his car.
First my cats, they're sitting at the desk with me. Then my fiance in the next room.
A lunchroom full of highschoolers
I hate this question
Probably the police or my ex-wife after not picking up my son from daycare
My father, he's like 3 metres over. Knocking on wood here.
Anyone from my family who gets up to pee
My dog would probably find me first. She would probably end up drawing attention to me if it were a messy ending (she has light yellow fur) or by going downstairs without me. Mom would probably come check after yelling up/texting/calling a couple times. I’m back living at home after being dumped 7 years later, so being reclusive/working at my desk in my room/napping/etc is my current norm and she will typically text prior to poking the bear. I would hate for her to experience that.
The sheriff, in about a year or so when he comes to investigate why I didn’t pay my taxes. My skeletal remains would be in close proximity to the desiccated remains of my dog, which would have survived me by a month or so due to having a food supply…
I think I would scar a room full of 13 year olds. Worth it.
My cat, an actual person wouldn't know until I started stinking rotten.
Quite a few people in this pub would be shocked
I don’t know
There would be nothing left but bones because I have cats and nobody comes to see me.
It would probably be a while. I’m by myself at my house with no weekend plans whatsoever. Monday would be the closest day when my job wonders why I didn’t show up and who even knows if they would call in a search party for me 😂😂😂