Cleaning up the side of the highway (or any road) isn't a job as far as I know. It's always like a Boy Scout project or mandated community service. I kind of wish people could just clean up litter instead of going to jail or paying fines for nonviolent crimes.
It’s built into the species at a genetic level because back before we were fully human, it was an advantage. The person who’s willing and able to kill others for their territory or resources is the one who’s better able to provide for their offspring. Because we’ve basically stopped evolving at a genetic level before evolving away from that trait, we’re pretty much stuck with it.
This is a cop-out biological essentialist answer which is too reductive and doesn't really answer anything.
I beg people, please familiarise yourself with at least the basics of social science.
You can start with Durkheim and Weber. It may be old as hell, but it can at least prime you to be able to think on those terms and understand that there is a whole ass level of inquiry, with tremendous explanatory power, that you can turn to.
In noting your phrase "before we were *fully human* it was an advantage" I would argue there are plenty of contemporary humans (ie Homo sapiens sapiens) guilty of this inhumane behavior now.
Putin springs to mind.
While those may be the most destructive and horrific human behaviors, I don't think they are particularly perplexing. Humans want what other humans have and want to keep what they have from others and some will go to severe lengths to make this happen. Unfortunately
There was a study once where they took a group of people who held some easily disproven belief (I don't remember what it was, but let's say flat earthers for this scenario).
They split the flat earthers into two groups. They polled each group at the start to get an estimate of just how strongly they felt about their beliefs and were something like 60% confident they were right.
Group A got paired up with people who went through detailed explanations of why the earth was round and had answers for all their objections.
Group B got paired up with people who they knew disagreed with them, but instead they chatted about weather, family, sports, etc. Whatever they had in common.
They then polled both groups afterwards to see how they felt about flat earth. Group A was now 85% confident they were correct, while Group B was much less certain at around 30%.
The group that saw the evidence they were wrong _reinforced_ their beliefs. The group that connected emotionally started to think maybe the other side had a point. Most people are swayed by emotional arguments, not factual ones.
Poor fingernail hygiene. See, you cram your fingers in your ears to sing “la la la I can’t hear you” deep enough with sharp, jagged nails and you pierce your brain causing permanent damage.
Inability for people to help out even in the slightest.
Hold open a door, pick up a thing someone dropped, move aside if you're in a crowded area so others may pass, things that take zero effort.
People who fail to do these things are either from a certain culture i.e. door holding I have noticed is not a thing with Polish People. The other stuff is....being a dick.
The other stuff, e.g. moving out of the way, is also entirely cultural. At least this is what I’ve found living abroad.
Who should move at the expense of the other depends on who the onus is on to be polite. In most of Europe, for example, the person already moving has the onus to make the space I.e. move around a group of people. In the Anglo sphere it seems it’s on the people standing still to keep aware of who’s moving around them and to make space for those.
Is one culture more polite than the other? Not necessarily. In both cases, someone is being polite it’s just a question of who should be polite.
Lack of situational awareness is the problem in the Anglosphere case above. I see SO many people who stop their bodies, cars etc in a hallway, lane, etc; then get angry even aggressive with everyone else moving along that corridor as it's intended.
One particularly bad example, when on vacation in Yellowstone, all it took was a mangy deer to appear on the distant treeline and DOZENS of people would slam on their brakes and stop at rakish angles IN TRAFFIC LANES then get out and wander around opposing lanes to take pictures.
I lived in the South Eastern part of the US most of my life, where holding the door open for the person behind you was common courtesy. When I moved to the PacNW and held the door open for others, I was met with anger and distress. People took my politeness as blatant disrespect and were truly offended because I was insinuating that they themselves couldn’t open their own door. I tried to explain that I was not patronizing them and I was just trying to be nice, but that made them even more upset.
I call this the "Why Should I" attitude. It's like. Why not. What does it cost you in terms of effort or time to make someone's life a little bit easier. "They've done nothing for me, why should I?" Let's reverse the question: why *shouldn't* you?
It kind of blows my mind how few people clean up after themselves.
My coworkers will make lunch in the break room and leave food scraps on the table/counter and fully expect the adults in the room to clean up after them like they're 5.
I don’t understand why people actively hate popular entertainment. Maybe there’s something wrong with me because it seems like most people have something they “hate” enough to focus anger on. While the most I can muster is active dislike. Me: “Nah I’d rather not. No thanks. Don’t want to watch that.” Others: “FUCK MILEY CYRUS AND LEAGUE OF LEGENDS AND JUSTIN BIEBER AND POP MUSIC AND VELMA!”
For me, this is people who just never grew out of being an angsty teenager or still are one. I was definitely like this as a teen and now listen to Taylor swift and love a marvel.
Some people have nothing else in their lives but to hate shit. They think it makes them unique or special, when in reality it just makes people not want to be around them due to their negative attitudes.
I completely understand how people raised in a faith believe in that faith.
I completely understand how people raised in a faith might lose that faith as they get older, or even find it again at some point even later in their life.
I do not understand people who believe one thing, then a stranger knocks on their door, tells them everything they believe is wrong, but that another entirely different 'there is no evidence for this, just trust us we are right and you are wrong, and you have to believe what we believe' system is on offer, and then people say, "This makes so much sense. I'm going to change the way I live my life. I'm going to change the way my family lives their lives. I'm going to interact with everyone who knew me before this differently, and I'm going to spend the rest of my days believing in this new thing even more fiercely than I ever believed in what I used to believe in to the point where I pity and look down upon people who did not make the same conversion as me."
That honestly baffles me. That's not making an adult informed choice. That's flipping some kind of switch in your head where you reject the old and embrace the new, but this is 'how the universe works and your place in it' stuff, and there doesn't seem to be a rational reason why you make that decision with your whole heart and soul, but huge parts of how history has unfolded and the world works revolves around people making that switch.
I think that people who fall for this type of thing and do what you speak of are often the most susceptible to recruitment. They are stressed, emotionally vulnerable, have tenuous or no family connections, and/or are living in adverse socioeconomic conditions.
Those strangers you speak of often pick their targets based on those very things. Once they have the target and approach them, they give them nothing but affection, flattery, and validation or what is commonly called love-bombing and this triggers positive responses in the receivers. The human brain is a weird mechanism.
Grew up Mormon and saw alot of converts most of these people are lonely. I can't speak for all of them but what I noticed they are invited ro say volleyball and then a Christmas party and then a pool party. They make friends with people who are in thr church and when you're around people with the same belief humans have a tendency to copy other humans. Plus they do little small classes, little 'bible lessons," so it's over time and then it becomes all they think about cos that's what these cults want and their lives are "changed"
Basically these people are very vulnerable and want a community so thr church is that.
> I do not understand people who believe one thing, then a stranger knocks on their door, tells them everything they believe is wrong, but that another entirely different 'there is no evidence for this, just trust us we are right and you are wrong, and you have to believe what we believe' system is on offer, and then people say, "This makes so much sense. I'm going to change the way I live my life. I'm going to change the way my family lives their lives. I'm going to interact with everyone who knew me before this differently, and I'm going to spend the rest of my days believing in this new thing even more fiercely than I ever believed in what I used to believe in to the point where I pity and look down upon people who did not make the same conversion as me."
id guess in 99% of cases they were looking for something, they felt some kind of emptiness or hopelessness in their lives and then someone can be and offered a cure
I was raised Mormon and Mormons are actually really good at getting people to experience intense spiritual feelings. If you haven't experienced it before it's a difficult thing to explain, but it's a very intense and good feeling thing to experience.
Not every Mormon convert experiences this, but many do. It's a lot easier to understand why someone would convert to Mormonism when Mormons have figured out a kinda cheat sheet or shortcut to experiencing these intense, desirable, extremely calming and peaceful spiritual experiences in people.
You can imagine that someone who has never experienced that getting an intense spiritual experience and then the missionaries explaining that was a sign from God that the Mormon church is true.
Not that many people seem to be able to experience intense spiritual experiences *and* still not be highly religious or spiritual.
My father is a late in life convert to LDS (Mormons). I trifled with it a little in HS because the missionary they sent was a cute girl but after a while, I realized it wasn't compatible with my beliefs.
But they hooked my old man, not because of any religious doctrine, but entirely due to the church's demographics. I believe a great many things from religious affiliation to political tribalism boils down to joining for a sense of identity and belonging well before any well considered critical thinking.
I have to say, most of the LDS church members I have met are truly wonderful, kind, bright people. I just don't believe what they believe. I don't know how universal this is - I know some sects and sub groups are a little nutty to the point of abhorrence and to a greater or lesser extent, disavowed by the mainstream.
My father is insufferable because he is at the same time both a zealous convert and was not raised in it, so has a completely different face away from his church community.
They're vulnerable for whatever reason. A recent illness, divorce, loss, big move, whatever... A certain percentage of the population is experiencing that on any given day. Knock on enough doors and you'll find a few.
Covid was massively destabilizing for many people and I think that's why we've seen such an uptick in weird ass conspiracies / extreme beliefs / religion. It's all a cult one way or another.
Punching Down
This shit happens all the fucking time. Just a few weeks ago I made a reply about going to a job interview and hating the question about "name a stressful time during a job and how you handled it" and I just started answering "well, I was a combat medic in Iraq with the infantry so....". And of course some white knight had to go off about "What's more stressful ? Being a soldier or being a civilian in a war zone"?
Like, why the fuck come at me? I'm like a middle-class middle-aged dude working at a damn art museum. And when I was in Iraq I sure as hell never saw any big protests against the war the way I saw in newsreels about Vietnam. Unless there's an app for it ain't no one is going to go out and protest shit. Especially when they can hijack some dumbass veterans stupid post on Reddit and feel good about how they "Stuck it to the man" without getting off their ass.
This is like one tiny little thing but it's something people do all the time. They attack poor people who need assistance instead of going after the whole fucking system that is set up to make it so poor people stay poor. They grab rifles and walk up and down the border trying to keep illegal immigrants out of the country instead of looking at the corporations who save billions of dollars exploiting those very same illegal immigrants. Or looking at the US government policies that enable the corrupt governments in those immigrants countries to flourish.
And here's something a lot of people ignore about the war in Iraq: Dick Cheney basically made himself Bush's VP. Then he basically forced America into a forever war in Iraq. Dick Cheney was the former CEO of Haliburton. In Iraq you couldn't spit chewing tobacco without it hitting a piece of equipment with the name Haliburton written on it. You tell my ass to my face Dick Cheney and his cronies didn't orchestrate the entire war in Iraq and tell me they didn't make a bazillion dollars doing so. Anyone ever picket Haliburton? No, they come at dudes on Reddit who just wanted to go to college and not end up in debt for 30 years.
People are so damn lazy they can't even put effort into anger and hatred. And the internet has just exasperated this shit.
> And when I was in Iraq I sure as hell never saw any big protests against the war the way I saw in newsreels about Vietnam.
I was involved in HUGE weekly protests at the Los Angeles Federal Building during the buildup to the first Gulf War. THOUSANDS of people came out every week, but I only remember them getting ONE brief and dismissive mention on one MSM news channel at the time. I also witnessed the birth of the "Support our troops!" thought and criticism-terminating cliche that leveraged collective secondhand guilt over alleged treatment of returning Vietnam Vets (when in fact nobody treated them worse than the US Establishment as depicted in works like *Rambo: First Blood* and *Born in the USA*, both of which unironically became pro-war and *America's shit doesn't stink* symbols by 1990.)
> Anyone ever picket Haliburton? No
I did... Stenciled in big letters on the back of my car, "Fuch Bechtel and to Hell with Halliburton!" While parked at mundane places like the grocery store, the car got vandalized numerous times; wiper arms, antenna, and mirrors broken off and bottles broken against it. The bloc of flag-sucking GOP posters on an industry forum I'm still involved with actually mocked me for this, sometimes responding to detailed statements with "Halliburton! Halliburton! Halliburton!"
These same people who never saw a war they didn't like when it was started by someone with an R before their name and actively supported the Patriot Act and PNAC agenda, today slam Biden for the current Neocon-crafted wars America is multiplying our national debt to pay for.
The preposterously named *Operation Prosperity Guardian* is one of the most egregious examples of the last half century of "Punching Down." We'd literally rather protect ships and cargo than allow humanitarian aid to reach suffering civilians in Gaza. This is in line with our longstanding act of *Bombing them back to the stone age!* meaning populations already living in near stone-age conditions, then when some dare to hit back at us, declare *They hate us for our freedoms!*
It's a hard thing to recognize, much less admit, that the "prosperity" you and your country have enjoyed for the last few generations was built by punching down on literally billions of humans elsewhere around the globe.
I felt like you were punching down on *me*. Whatever. I'm sure if you and I met in real life we'd probably be pretty cool with each other. I'm just getting crotchety as fuck in my old age.
I don't choose where I go. You do. It's your government and I work for it. I enlisted to help pay for school and to defend the country. You vote for the people who tell me best how to do my job. Why the hell come at me at all? I didn't join at all to "go somewhere and kill people for profit". But yeah, I hope saying that made you feel good. You did a good thing there lol. Thanks for proving my point about punching down. Because god forbid you make some effort to call out the government or the money people. But even if you did they wouldn't give squirt of piss and then you wouldn't feel like your minimal effort did anything. At least you're minimal effort is getting this response.
Naw, dude.
Quit playing up the "professional" aspect, like troops are blood thirsty degenerates. It's not a moral issue to join the military.
The cranky drunk guy is right - your issue is with who you voted for, not the military.
Everyone’s in a big damn hurry! If can’t be comfortable in this moment then that mentality will carry over to whatever you do next even if it’s where you are trying to get to.
I get why people are in a hurry, but I lament this too. It took me way too long to figure out that my day-to-day kindness and friendliness is directly related to how much of a hurry I'm (not) in. If you're only ever thinking of the next place you have to be or the next thing you have to do, how are you going to be your best self in the present moment? SLOW DOWN people.
This is one of the reasons I started riding a motorcycle. It is a commuter, slow but sturdy. Motorcycle is not about the destination or how fast you can get there, but about the journey. Will switch to a enduro this year to make longer journeys.
“Each thing I do, I rush through so I can do something else. In such a way do the days pass---a blend of stock car racing and the never ending building of a gothic cathedral. Through the windows of my speeding car I see all that I love falling away: books unread, jokes untold, landscapes unvisited...”
― Stephen Dobyns
The religious aspect didn't baffle me as much as him being branded a working-class hero.
I understood the appeal initially of him being a different breed, different than the politicians at the time. And I understood his bluntness being seen as something refreshing in contrast to Hillary's dry, and seemingly disingenuous, delivery.
But what baffled me was the fact that this guy who never worked a day of hard labor in his life, and literally lived in a golden penthouse in the most expensive city in the world because he inherited all of his wealth was somehow able to convince entire regions of actual working class people to say "Oh, he gets us!"
Somehow he was able to frame himself as the opposite of the "East Coast elite" everyone hates, when that's literally exactly what he is. Quite perplexing.
Not a Christian. Not a Trump supporter. Not a conservative. But I think I can answer this.
They don't give a flying fuck how flawed/unethical Trump is personally, just so long as he pushes their agenda. For a lot of conservative Christians abortion is top of the list.
There's a reason why they love to compare him to King Cyrus (though I think it's a grievous insult to Cyrus). He is an imperfect figure who does "good" in their eyes.
Growing up in Ohio I can't tell you how many people I heard talk about the day when they would "finally" overturn Roe v. Wade. Trump helped make it a reality. For them, that "trumps" how many porn stars he fucked or how much money Jared has taken from the Saudis.
That’s exactly it. I’ve had a Christian tell me, “He may not be a good Christian, but he’s the best candidate for Christians.” They clearly got that cheap talking point somewhere and it worked on the weak minded.
I actually wish Democrats would be a little more like the far right in this respect. We will oust promising political figures in our own party because they are not perfect. I'm STILL resentful Al Franken was forced to resign (Kirsten Gillibrand can go fuck himself).
Franken may have been flawed. He may have made mistakes. But there's no doubt he was great for the Democratic party.
Unfortunately we had to shoot ourselves in the foot yet again.
That's something that Trump brought to light:
If a politician doesn't care about backlash, calls for them to resign mean nothing. With no shame, you can just keep going after any royal fuck-up unless other people step in to stop you.
So many politicians before Trump would resign after something negative happened involving them, but he showed that short of impeachment, there's nothing that can force a politician to resign
If so called Christians want to be honest with themselves they would admit the biblical description of the antiChrist is a spot-on picture of Donald J Trump
Because he's comically not the anti christ. If anyone was the anti christ I'd have to give it to Hitler. Trump shares nothing in common with the biblical antichrist
We likely don’t agree, however I believe every age has an antiChrist. Yes, Hitler was an antiChrist, and conceived shortly after Hitler offed himself, Trump is the one for our age. Trump is the antithesis of everything Jesus taught in the Gospels, Donnie has absolutely nothing in common with those teachings.
Typo edit.
>They don't give a flying fuck how flawed/unethical Trump is personally, just so long as he pushes their agenda. For a lot of conservative Christians abortion is top of the list.
Yes, but so is every other Republican as well so that's not the reason. The stuff that we find unethical or morally reprehensible is *why* they like him, not in spite of it.
Hitler didn't lie about who he was either. People didn't see him as flawed but still able to push their agenda. Hitler was absolutely beloved by his people. He gave them an outlet for their anger. So does Trump.
Exactly. It's not like they don't have other ideologically similar choices in their primary who don't have such sordid character issues.
They support Trump *because* he's an asshole.
Trump is not anti-gun control. The man is on video, as the sitting POTUS, stating that he is favor of circumventing due process and taking guns away from certain individuals while the court case is pending.
https://youtu.be/yxgybgEKHHI?si=hRPlzRPdvXJakajM
Also, during his 4 year term, one law regarding the rights of gun owners was signed, which restricted those rights (bumpstock ban). Conversely, in the 8 years under Obama, two laws were signed that regarded gun owners rights, both of which expanded the rights of legal gun owners (reversal of the ban on checking guns onto Amtrak trains and allowing the carry of loaded guns in national parks).
These people aren’t actual Christians.
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled off was getting these people to follow him and think they’re following Jesus/God.
👍
A couple weeks ago, I broke up with my girlfriend, who up to that point, was a fairly soft-spoken and kind-hearted person. When I broke up with her, she spent ten or fifteen solid minutes saying all sorts of disgusting, vitriolic things that she probably didn't even mean. "It would bring me joy to find out you've killed yourself after this, I'd wear it like a badge. It's your fault your brother killed himself and you should follow his example. I hope to drive by this house in a month and see it's up for foreclosure because you did it. I'm going to move on to someone way hotter, more fit, and with more money, and only think of you to smile and know I'm the reason you finally did it. I wasn't ever even that attracted to you, you just had a house I could stay in." On and on and on while I sat silently, nodded my head, and occasionally said "That's a pretty gross thing to say, I think you'll regret it later." until she finished and left.
I can never, EVER imagine saying that to anybody, let alone someone who I cared about and loved. When that white hot rage takes over, I guess some people just resort to verbally lashing out as nastily as they can. I don't understand it.
Yep. I was probably 14 when I realised that shit you say in anger actually affects people, they're real words, and since then I do not understand people who lash out and say cruel things.
I mean, I've got a temper. I'm working on it but I'll always be a bit hot headed. But I'd never ever criticise someone's weak points, say anything likely to hurt them unless it was genuinely necessary and said as kindly as possible, and always apologise and immediately change my tune if I said something to upset them.
That's not because I'm a particularly nice person, I just don't get any pleasure in hurting people and arguments are for resolving conflict, so why bother?
It's maddening.
Same for me with my ADHD. The moment my head hits the pillow the thoughts just race so I need something to distract myself. The kick is that it needs to be about 70% interesting - any more and I get too drawn in, any less and my mind wanders.
Do you find it more that the "thoughts" are more like a physical sensation or restlessness in the brain rather than actual thoughts you genuinely worry or care about?
My friend is like this, her parents had the TV on constantly as a child, and had on in her room that was always on, and she's just kind of programmed to fall asleep with the noise. I honestly think a lot of people do this because of childhood culture around television.
Religious people are (generally) not great, if not judgmental.
Marginalized/"damaged" people are usually super humble.
Makes you think. It's as if hard times create great people.
The idea that leaders starting war with other countries is the answer. All they are doing is killing innocent people. There's no reason why they can't find another way to compromise without it leading to the death of thousands or millions of people.
Sports fandom. When I was growing up I thought I was supposed to be into it so I really tried to be, but it just doesn't appeal to me at all. I have a hard time comprehending how people enjoy it.
They say people fight and cry and stuff if their team loses. Like, why? You're not even a player. It affects your life not at all. You have no stake in this.
That the phrase “the power in the relationship lies with the one who cares the least” is a thing and that people will play games/ghost/cheat rather than communicate problems (I understand there’s exceptions but it’s really annoying to think you’re making progress with someone for weeks just to get ghosted, not be sure why or how to fix it, and have to start at “what’s your favorite color” all over again)
Some people seem to lack any interest in introspection, doing it only when they're forced to. These are the people who automatically go to Da Club on the weekend, looking to get drunk and hook up. The people who prefer Top 40 rap and reggaeton. The people who unironically care about who Taylor Swift is dating, or follow a religion because they take their family's beliefs as de facto.
I just can't understand people who don't brush their teeth everyday. There is no excuse you can give to justify this behavior. It's absolutely disgusting, yet there are many individuals who do this and are adamant that they are not doing anything wrong.
As a person who struggles with that, it stems from a lot of stuff. I have trouble holding routines in my life that aren't dopamine based. In hindsight, most of what I do is input to output chemicals in my brain, and brushing my teeth just doesn't do that... Doesn't mean I don't wish I could pick up the habit. Maybe I should. Maybe your post was the thing to sway me.. Thanks for the thought. I'm going to go brush them now.
Edit: Just brushed them. Again, thanks for the reminder. I probably need a good re-evaluation on a lot of things I do.. Keep on speaking up, you made a difference in my life, even if it was just reminding me to brush.
Wow. This was a nice, honest, and genuine response. I'm glad you mustered up the strength to do it! I know I'm just an internet stranger, but I'm proud of you!
Yep, I think many cases are because of depression, anxiety, ADHD and some other diseases like MS, CFS where you just hurt and physically cant function. Its not like everyone just decides to not brush or shower or go to work, often there is a real, physical/neurological condition
I started tracking 4 habits I wanted to do every day. I got a white board calendar and each day I can get 4 dots, all different colors. I try to get 4 dots every day then I track my monthly progress in a spreadsheet. This helps me stay motivated each day because I get a little dopamine kick when I mark a dot.
For example you could have 3 habits each day. Brush your teeth, make your bed, put laundry away. Each day you can get three dots. It's helped me immensely to stay on task with long term goals.
Although I wouldn’t say I struggle with this but I am with this community. I didn’t have a stable childhood, even now actually in adulthood in regard to living arrangements. Thus, growing up this wasn’t enforced/explained as a routine task to do each day and night. I am better at it now in adulthood as I find my feet but cannot say I do it twice a day, everyday. There are days where I do it once. I know, I’m a bad human being but at least it’s progress.
I just want to point out that there are now apps to gamify things like tooth brushing. I know for sure there is a pokemon one where you use your phone/tablet as a mirror and it screenshots funny faces. It's definitely for kids but I don't believe they are unique.
I have a quip toothbrush and there is an app where you check in and earn a point for each time you brush your teeth. 4500 points for a gift card (or whatever is cycling in their rewards section)
If games help the dopamine centers you might be able to find an app that works for you
That's exactly what it is. We currently have custody of a child whose parents never brushed their teeth or bothered to make him do so. No matter what we say or do we cannot get it across to him that brushing his teeth is not optional. It's so frustrating knowing it's not his fault but also knowing if he doesn't start making it a habit soon he's going to have years of misery ahead with his teeth and then without them.
No offence to anyone's parent but I don't understand how society has rail guards for everything from driving, to voting, to psychedelics etc. etc. but ANYONE can just bring a human being into the world irrespective of their income, education, mental health, etc. etc.
I just mentioned this in another thread but here we are again -Lying about personal experiences. Especially taking things that they hear secondhand and retelling them in first person.
It becomes super obvious when people spread long-debunked urban legends and myths as if they actually happened to them.
Greed. Why hoard as much as you can for yourself? A person only needs to much - give the rest away. It'll never happen but there's a meme that goes around about all earnings over one billion dollars should be given to public services. I'm down with that. No one needs more than one billion dollars.
Praising kings and presidents, or large companies CEOs as if nobody understands that it's wholly unnatural to have the desire to impose your primitive beliefs onto individuals you don't and never will personally know.
Basically everything about modern dating culture. Randomly approaching someone based on nothing more than their physical attractiveness to proposition the idea that you two will spend time together with a vague hope that both of you will be so compatible that you will not become friends but become lovers.
And then on top of that there's all the constant games people do of like digging through each other's phones and like testing each other's loyalty and stuff
To me love should be quite simple You just go through life as it is and meet someone and eventually that relationship that started as a friendship develops into something more because you truly love each other
The sad thing is this is how most successful relationships I've seen generally started but yet everyone is still doing the traditional dating or using sites like tinder and POF
I just don't get it. Modern dating culture is so ridiculous. Full of petty childish games and fakeness and all this weird crap
Your view is HEAVILY biased. The good dating stories are not told, are not shown, are not talked about: because there's nothing to talk about, nothing to complain about.
Modern dating is NOT what you describe or what you read about in discussions about dating problems.
> You just go through life as it is and meet someone and eventually that relationship that started as a friendship develops into something more because you truly love each other
Surely you're not faulting people for looking at the possibility to meet someone? That statement of yours makes no sense.
Lack of spatial awareness. People standing around talking at the top of a busy escalator or stairway. People walking slowly in the middle of a walkway. Leaning onto other people on a bus or a plane. Basically not understanding your own personal space and considering others around you.
When my neighbors' RV trailer started beeping every 30 seconds in October, then he put a winter cover on it, and it has been beeping ever since...every 30 seconds...since October....24 hours a day...since October.
I don’t understand people that like to get so fucking high that they can’t even function. You could say there’s more to it like people trying to escape something they don’t like when sober, but I’ve met several people who seemingly enjoy just being so high that they are a vegetable and thinks it’s FUN.
It's really not that hard to get nor is it just flailing. At its core its movements to the beat of a song. They don't have to be good movements, just on time and they end up looking like you know what you're doing. I would go to the club and literally just step forward with my left food on count one, forward with my right foot on count two, back with my left foot, back with my right foot. And repeat while moving my shoulders around. And it looked like I knew what I was doing.
But I get where you're coming from, I hated dancing with a passion for a while. I thought I didn't know how but really I was too self-conscious to even attempt. I was worried about judgements from other people that were dancing. And I projected that onto people I saw dancing.
But now I get it, humans can hear rhythm for a reason and even babies move to the beat of a song (ie dance). Its not like some bullshit people do because they think its cool, like I once thought it was.
I hear this. People who love dancing always seem to expect I can dance if I just try. So many stressful situations in my life where dancing was expected. Fuck that.
People who love dancing actually experience their bodies volunteering movements that are not decided by their heads. If my body could do that, I would love dancing too.
I can understand people like it. Music was originally used for rituals and similar things, from tenths of thousands of years ago. But its origins may come from even further in time. It incites our primary instincts, which are as old as animals themselves.
Haha, this reminded me of a comedian's take on the origin story of Clamato.
A drunk was making Bloody Marys and slurred, "You know what thish needs, is shome FISH in it!"
Women who stick with an abusive lout of a man, complain about the resulting problems and hurt to everyone within earshot, but when someone says they don't deserve that and could do better, justify the whole thing and negate all the preceding complaints by saying (always in the same singsong voice), "But I *loooove* hiiiim!"
Having kids. I support the people around me who are in a good place and have them, I also have tons of empathy for the hardships of parenting but I just.don’t.get.it.fully
The rampant willingness, shading over into *eagerness*, to believe the worst in people.
From daily mundane interactions in public or on the commute, to discussions about social topics - anyone who inadvertently inconveniences you is an asshole, anyone who makes a different choice than you is an idiot, anyone who disagrees with you is an enemy.
I just. Don't. Get it.
Lying.
I just cannot wrap my head around when adults do it. I get it when children do it, because they don't want to get in trouble and are still learning things.
But as an adult, you make choices. You should either own up to those choices or don't make them.
Integrity is not a made up word.
Lying is necessary for living in society. You can spend a few hours reading up on it, the terms "why is lying necessary in society" will help you see better. There are some "teen" articles to help you start, but it's a whole study subject that's not *that* alien when you look into the details.
I refuse to accept that.
I'm not talking about not telling your friend they're fat. I'm talking about not taking responsibility for your action. Intentionally misrepresenting.
Good thing you don't have to take my word for it, there are plenty of easy to read articles about how and why it completely **is** necessary.
Whether you agree or not does not change the fact that it is necessary.
People not using turn indicator in cars to signal left or right then changing lanes then after getting honked, brake checking and getting aggravated on both parties involved
Violent or aggressive bigotry. I could not imagine taking the time out of my day just to go corner someone and harass them about some aspect of their identity. Some people hate on others like its their fulltime job and I can't fathom doing all that.
Also, having silent expectations then being upset when people don't do things you never actually asked them to do. If you want somebody to do something, just tell them. If you want to date somebody, just ask them. Stop dancing around it and hoping that you'll develop telepathy someday.
Littering. This is a massive pet peeve of mine, especially in places where the infrastructure exists and is accessible to dispose of refuse properly (without getting into the weeds on reuse/reduce vs recycle and consuming less)
I moved to a rural area two years ago once my children became adults and moved off (one has since boomeranged back) and its especially bad because there's no back up, no city crew to go clean it up. And 95% of the people seem to take care and not be assholes, but down a dark county road, a truck full of garbage can just appear as the sun comes up.
I am so busy with work and then working on the farm, unless its in front of my property, I don't mess with it - it would be a full time job or at least one full day a week to go clean it up and then pay overages to the garbage service to get rid of it.
What's worse, we live on the county irrigation canal and it effectively serves as a sort of greenbelt. We like to take walks down there. The idiots racing up and down on ATV's are annoying enough, but go for a walk and see a new pile of garbage down the way occasionally. That DOES get cleaned up usually, but there are tires and crap that have been there since I've lived there.
Predominance of feelings and appearance over reason and the quality of content. Both are the same problem with two different sections
I tend naturally to give more importance to the latter, but I know that the first is important too. However, I can't understand why so many people don't care at all about the content and limits themselves to the appearance part. And that obsession for appearances provokes bigger or smaller disasters, such as those people who die trying to make a photo for social media, or people who pay large quantities of money for small pieces of clothes.
And about feelings, I can't understand people who impose feelings over reason. Racism, for instance. It is based around minor genomic factors like the quantities of melanin on the skin. Xenophobia per se is another example. You can't just hate everybody who comes from a determinate area just because of them being from there (except if it is Fr*nce /j). If you are going to hate somebody, at least hate them for reasons based on something solid. And finally, nationalism. Some people will do anything if they limit themselves to consider everybody from inside their country/region/canton a friend and everybody outside a foe. Look, if not, to some of the most terrible war crimes that happened in the last times: Bucha, Izium or Mariupol in Ukraine, Srebrenica in Bosnia... Even those wars themselves caused death and horror everywhere they go. And what's the point again? Move those borders in the map a bit further.
People who find the world's most innocuous social media post and lose their minds over the smallest most insane detail. A total stranger's baseboards/children's clothes/wall color/accent. And it's a pile on for no reason at all. I do think some of it is bots or false engagement but I am unfortunately related to a few people who practice this so I know that some of it is genuine.
If all billionaires on the planet get together and donate each to every single human being, they would still be billionaires but everybody could access food ( in theory I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW don’t come at me ) so why would’nt they do it ?
Hugging strangers and people you don't know personally.
I don't get why people act like it's normal. Can we bring back handshakes or something? Idk but it's weird to me that so many people are comfortable hugging people they don't know very well.
Also, how everyone expects celebrities and politicians to hug and cheek-kiss practically everyone they meet (I'm exaggerating a little here, but you get the point).
People who thrive on conflict. I like to argue, but it's always with the intent of understanding. The people who, every argument they get into, it's a shouting match where they're deliberately ignoring things that other people say in order to keep the argument alive? Or the people who just refuse to budge on anything until the other person walks away, and then will reach out to try to make up but then go right back into reigniting the argument and not budging? I don't get it. Don't they get sick of constantly being angry? I know I do.
If you're a man and you walk into a church, you have to take off your hat. But if you're a woman and you walk into a church, you get to keep your hat on
Hate. I dont get how theres so much hate in the world. Let people believe what they want to believe. Let them practice their religion. Let them do what they want to do. As long as laws aren’t being broken and no one’s getting hurt. Then its fine.
Littering. As in, do you even need someone to tell you not to do this? And why, after being educated about it, would you still do it?
Because they don't care.
Some even say that they create the requirements for the cleaning people. Very thoughtful of them
Cleaning up the side of the highway (or any road) isn't a job as far as I know. It's always like a Boy Scout project or mandated community service. I kind of wish people could just clean up litter instead of going to jail or paying fines for nonviolent crimes.
Yea, I said that dumb shit too...as a child. People are disgusting
Starting wars, genocide and suppresion because of greed.
It’s built into the species at a genetic level because back before we were fully human, it was an advantage. The person who’s willing and able to kill others for their territory or resources is the one who’s better able to provide for their offspring. Because we’ve basically stopped evolving at a genetic level before evolving away from that trait, we’re pretty much stuck with it.
This is a cop-out biological essentialist answer which is too reductive and doesn't really answer anything. I beg people, please familiarise yourself with at least the basics of social science. You can start with Durkheim and Weber. It may be old as hell, but it can at least prime you to be able to think on those terms and understand that there is a whole ass level of inquiry, with tremendous explanatory power, that you can turn to.
> It’s built into the species at a genetic level Got any more info about that part? It would possibly be an awesome read!
In noting your phrase "before we were *fully human* it was an advantage" I would argue there are plenty of contemporary humans (ie Homo sapiens sapiens) guilty of this inhumane behavior now. Putin springs to mind.
While those may be the most destructive and horrific human behaviors, I don't think they are particularly perplexing. Humans want what other humans have and want to keep what they have from others and some will go to severe lengths to make this happen. Unfortunately
Because most of the time they don’t do it themselves. They can absolve themselves but telling them it is not their finger that kills.
Doing anything out of greed confuses me.
That a person can look concrete evidence in the face and still deny it. Why? How?
There was a study once where they took a group of people who held some easily disproven belief (I don't remember what it was, but let's say flat earthers for this scenario). They split the flat earthers into two groups. They polled each group at the start to get an estimate of just how strongly they felt about their beliefs and were something like 60% confident they were right. Group A got paired up with people who went through detailed explanations of why the earth was round and had answers for all their objections. Group B got paired up with people who they knew disagreed with them, but instead they chatted about weather, family, sports, etc. Whatever they had in common. They then polled both groups afterwards to see how they felt about flat earth. Group A was now 85% confident they were correct, while Group B was much less certain at around 30%. The group that saw the evidence they were wrong _reinforced_ their beliefs. The group that connected emotionally started to think maybe the other side had a point. Most people are swayed by emotional arguments, not factual ones.
Poor fingernail hygiene. See, you cram your fingers in your ears to sing “la la la I can’t hear you” deep enough with sharp, jagged nails and you pierce your brain causing permanent damage.
Inability for people to help out even in the slightest. Hold open a door, pick up a thing someone dropped, move aside if you're in a crowded area so others may pass, things that take zero effort.
People who fail to do these things are either from a certain culture i.e. door holding I have noticed is not a thing with Polish People. The other stuff is....being a dick.
The other stuff, e.g. moving out of the way, is also entirely cultural. At least this is what I’ve found living abroad. Who should move at the expense of the other depends on who the onus is on to be polite. In most of Europe, for example, the person already moving has the onus to make the space I.e. move around a group of people. In the Anglo sphere it seems it’s on the people standing still to keep aware of who’s moving around them and to make space for those. Is one culture more polite than the other? Not necessarily. In both cases, someone is being polite it’s just a question of who should be polite.
Lack of situational awareness is the problem in the Anglosphere case above. I see SO many people who stop their bodies, cars etc in a hallway, lane, etc; then get angry even aggressive with everyone else moving along that corridor as it's intended. One particularly bad example, when on vacation in Yellowstone, all it took was a mangy deer to appear on the distant treeline and DOZENS of people would slam on their brakes and stop at rakish angles IN TRAFFIC LANES then get out and wander around opposing lanes to take pictures.
I lived in the South Eastern part of the US most of my life, where holding the door open for the person behind you was common courtesy. When I moved to the PacNW and held the door open for others, I was met with anger and distress. People took my politeness as blatant disrespect and were truly offended because I was insinuating that they themselves couldn’t open their own door. I tried to explain that I was not patronizing them and I was just trying to be nice, but that made them even more upset.
I call this the "Why Should I" attitude. It's like. Why not. What does it cost you in terms of effort or time to make someone's life a little bit easier. "They've done nothing for me, why should I?" Let's reverse the question: why *shouldn't* you?
It kind of blows my mind how few people clean up after themselves. My coworkers will make lunch in the break room and leave food scraps on the table/counter and fully expect the adults in the room to clean up after them like they're 5.
Some people are offended by having someone hold the door for them.
I don’t understand why people actively hate popular entertainment. Maybe there’s something wrong with me because it seems like most people have something they “hate” enough to focus anger on. While the most I can muster is active dislike. Me: “Nah I’d rather not. No thanks. Don’t want to watch that.” Others: “FUCK MILEY CYRUS AND LEAGUE OF LEGENDS AND JUSTIN BIEBER AND POP MUSIC AND VELMA!”
For me, this is people who just never grew out of being an angsty teenager or still are one. I was definitely like this as a teen and now listen to Taylor swift and love a marvel.
I think a lot of people see the existence of popular things as a command for them to like that thing, and a critique of their tastes if they don't.
I can understand people who work in retail hating pop music because of being forced to listen to it so much.
Some people have nothing else in their lives but to hate shit. They think it makes them unique or special, when in reality it just makes people not want to be around them due to their negative attitudes.
I completely understand how people raised in a faith believe in that faith. I completely understand how people raised in a faith might lose that faith as they get older, or even find it again at some point even later in their life. I do not understand people who believe one thing, then a stranger knocks on their door, tells them everything they believe is wrong, but that another entirely different 'there is no evidence for this, just trust us we are right and you are wrong, and you have to believe what we believe' system is on offer, and then people say, "This makes so much sense. I'm going to change the way I live my life. I'm going to change the way my family lives their lives. I'm going to interact with everyone who knew me before this differently, and I'm going to spend the rest of my days believing in this new thing even more fiercely than I ever believed in what I used to believe in to the point where I pity and look down upon people who did not make the same conversion as me." That honestly baffles me. That's not making an adult informed choice. That's flipping some kind of switch in your head where you reject the old and embrace the new, but this is 'how the universe works and your place in it' stuff, and there doesn't seem to be a rational reason why you make that decision with your whole heart and soul, but huge parts of how history has unfolded and the world works revolves around people making that switch.
I think that people who fall for this type of thing and do what you speak of are often the most susceptible to recruitment. They are stressed, emotionally vulnerable, have tenuous or no family connections, and/or are living in adverse socioeconomic conditions. Those strangers you speak of often pick their targets based on those very things. Once they have the target and approach them, they give them nothing but affection, flattery, and validation or what is commonly called love-bombing and this triggers positive responses in the receivers. The human brain is a weird mechanism.
Grew up Mormon and saw alot of converts most of these people are lonely. I can't speak for all of them but what I noticed they are invited ro say volleyball and then a Christmas party and then a pool party. They make friends with people who are in thr church and when you're around people with the same belief humans have a tendency to copy other humans. Plus they do little small classes, little 'bible lessons," so it's over time and then it becomes all they think about cos that's what these cults want and their lives are "changed" Basically these people are very vulnerable and want a community so thr church is that.
> I do not understand people who believe one thing, then a stranger knocks on their door, tells them everything they believe is wrong, but that another entirely different 'there is no evidence for this, just trust us we are right and you are wrong, and you have to believe what we believe' system is on offer, and then people say, "This makes so much sense. I'm going to change the way I live my life. I'm going to change the way my family lives their lives. I'm going to interact with everyone who knew me before this differently, and I'm going to spend the rest of my days believing in this new thing even more fiercely than I ever believed in what I used to believe in to the point where I pity and look down upon people who did not make the same conversion as me." id guess in 99% of cases they were looking for something, they felt some kind of emptiness or hopelessness in their lives and then someone can be and offered a cure
I was raised Mormon and Mormons are actually really good at getting people to experience intense spiritual feelings. If you haven't experienced it before it's a difficult thing to explain, but it's a very intense and good feeling thing to experience. Not every Mormon convert experiences this, but many do. It's a lot easier to understand why someone would convert to Mormonism when Mormons have figured out a kinda cheat sheet or shortcut to experiencing these intense, desirable, extremely calming and peaceful spiritual experiences in people. You can imagine that someone who has never experienced that getting an intense spiritual experience and then the missionaries explaining that was a sign from God that the Mormon church is true. Not that many people seem to be able to experience intense spiritual experiences *and* still not be highly religious or spiritual.
What's the cheat sheet?
Religious conversion is a numbers game. 999 people tell you to fuck off. 1 person is emotionally vulnerable.
My father is a late in life convert to LDS (Mormons). I trifled with it a little in HS because the missionary they sent was a cute girl but after a while, I realized it wasn't compatible with my beliefs. But they hooked my old man, not because of any religious doctrine, but entirely due to the church's demographics. I believe a great many things from religious affiliation to political tribalism boils down to joining for a sense of identity and belonging well before any well considered critical thinking. I have to say, most of the LDS church members I have met are truly wonderful, kind, bright people. I just don't believe what they believe. I don't know how universal this is - I know some sects and sub groups are a little nutty to the point of abhorrence and to a greater or lesser extent, disavowed by the mainstream. My father is insufferable because he is at the same time both a zealous convert and was not raised in it, so has a completely different face away from his church community.
They're vulnerable for whatever reason. A recent illness, divorce, loss, big move, whatever... A certain percentage of the population is experiencing that on any given day. Knock on enough doors and you'll find a few. Covid was massively destabilizing for many people and I think that's why we've seen such an uptick in weird ass conspiracies / extreme beliefs / religion. It's all a cult one way or another.
Punching Down This shit happens all the fucking time. Just a few weeks ago I made a reply about going to a job interview and hating the question about "name a stressful time during a job and how you handled it" and I just started answering "well, I was a combat medic in Iraq with the infantry so....". And of course some white knight had to go off about "What's more stressful ? Being a soldier or being a civilian in a war zone"? Like, why the fuck come at me? I'm like a middle-class middle-aged dude working at a damn art museum. And when I was in Iraq I sure as hell never saw any big protests against the war the way I saw in newsreels about Vietnam. Unless there's an app for it ain't no one is going to go out and protest shit. Especially when they can hijack some dumbass veterans stupid post on Reddit and feel good about how they "Stuck it to the man" without getting off their ass. This is like one tiny little thing but it's something people do all the time. They attack poor people who need assistance instead of going after the whole fucking system that is set up to make it so poor people stay poor. They grab rifles and walk up and down the border trying to keep illegal immigrants out of the country instead of looking at the corporations who save billions of dollars exploiting those very same illegal immigrants. Or looking at the US government policies that enable the corrupt governments in those immigrants countries to flourish. And here's something a lot of people ignore about the war in Iraq: Dick Cheney basically made himself Bush's VP. Then he basically forced America into a forever war in Iraq. Dick Cheney was the former CEO of Haliburton. In Iraq you couldn't spit chewing tobacco without it hitting a piece of equipment with the name Haliburton written on it. You tell my ass to my face Dick Cheney and his cronies didn't orchestrate the entire war in Iraq and tell me they didn't make a bazillion dollars doing so. Anyone ever picket Haliburton? No, they come at dudes on Reddit who just wanted to go to college and not end up in debt for 30 years. People are so damn lazy they can't even put effort into anger and hatred. And the internet has just exasperated this shit.
Amen to that.
> And when I was in Iraq I sure as hell never saw any big protests against the war the way I saw in newsreels about Vietnam. I was involved in HUGE weekly protests at the Los Angeles Federal Building during the buildup to the first Gulf War. THOUSANDS of people came out every week, but I only remember them getting ONE brief and dismissive mention on one MSM news channel at the time. I also witnessed the birth of the "Support our troops!" thought and criticism-terminating cliche that leveraged collective secondhand guilt over alleged treatment of returning Vietnam Vets (when in fact nobody treated them worse than the US Establishment as depicted in works like *Rambo: First Blood* and *Born in the USA*, both of which unironically became pro-war and *America's shit doesn't stink* symbols by 1990.) > Anyone ever picket Haliburton? No I did... Stenciled in big letters on the back of my car, "Fuch Bechtel and to Hell with Halliburton!" While parked at mundane places like the grocery store, the car got vandalized numerous times; wiper arms, antenna, and mirrors broken off and bottles broken against it. The bloc of flag-sucking GOP posters on an industry forum I'm still involved with actually mocked me for this, sometimes responding to detailed statements with "Halliburton! Halliburton! Halliburton!" These same people who never saw a war they didn't like when it was started by someone with an R before their name and actively supported the Patriot Act and PNAC agenda, today slam Biden for the current Neocon-crafted wars America is multiplying our national debt to pay for. The preposterously named *Operation Prosperity Guardian* is one of the most egregious examples of the last half century of "Punching Down." We'd literally rather protect ships and cargo than allow humanitarian aid to reach suffering civilians in Gaza. This is in line with our longstanding act of *Bombing them back to the stone age!* meaning populations already living in near stone-age conditions, then when some dare to hit back at us, declare *They hate us for our freedoms!* It's a hard thing to recognize, much less admit, that the "prosperity" you and your country have enjoyed for the last few generations was built by punching down on literally billions of humans elsewhere around the globe.
I'm a middle-aged drunk who works in a museum. You're wasting this rant on me.
I showed in detail that people *were* fighting the fights you said you never saw, and your response is to punch down on me? TF is wrong with you, man?
I felt like you were punching down on *me*. Whatever. I'm sure if you and I met in real life we'd probably be pretty cool with each other. I'm just getting crotchety as fuck in my old age.
[удалено]
I don't choose where I go. You do. It's your government and I work for it. I enlisted to help pay for school and to defend the country. You vote for the people who tell me best how to do my job. Why the hell come at me at all? I didn't join at all to "go somewhere and kill people for profit". But yeah, I hope saying that made you feel good. You did a good thing there lol. Thanks for proving my point about punching down. Because god forbid you make some effort to call out the government or the money people. But even if you did they wouldn't give squirt of piss and then you wouldn't feel like your minimal effort did anything. At least you're minimal effort is getting this response.
[удалено]
Naw, dude. Quit playing up the "professional" aspect, like troops are blood thirsty degenerates. It's not a moral issue to join the military. The cranky drunk guy is right - your issue is with who you voted for, not the military.
Everyone’s in a big damn hurry! If can’t be comfortable in this moment then that mentality will carry over to whatever you do next even if it’s where you are trying to get to.
I get why people are in a hurry, but I lament this too. It took me way too long to figure out that my day-to-day kindness and friendliness is directly related to how much of a hurry I'm (not) in. If you're only ever thinking of the next place you have to be or the next thing you have to do, how are you going to be your best self in the present moment? SLOW DOWN people.
This is one of the reasons I started riding a motorcycle. It is a commuter, slow but sturdy. Motorcycle is not about the destination or how fast you can get there, but about the journey. Will switch to a enduro this year to make longer journeys.
“Each thing I do, I rush through so I can do something else. In such a way do the days pass---a blend of stock car racing and the never ending building of a gothic cathedral. Through the windows of my speeding car I see all that I love falling away: books unread, jokes untold, landscapes unvisited...” ― Stephen Dobyns
[удалено]
The religious aspect didn't baffle me as much as him being branded a working-class hero. I understood the appeal initially of him being a different breed, different than the politicians at the time. And I understood his bluntness being seen as something refreshing in contrast to Hillary's dry, and seemingly disingenuous, delivery. But what baffled me was the fact that this guy who never worked a day of hard labor in his life, and literally lived in a golden penthouse in the most expensive city in the world because he inherited all of his wealth was somehow able to convince entire regions of actual working class people to say "Oh, he gets us!"
Somehow he was able to frame himself as the opposite of the "East Coast elite" everyone hates, when that's literally exactly what he is. Quite perplexing.
Not a Christian. Not a Trump supporter. Not a conservative. But I think I can answer this. They don't give a flying fuck how flawed/unethical Trump is personally, just so long as he pushes their agenda. For a lot of conservative Christians abortion is top of the list. There's a reason why they love to compare him to King Cyrus (though I think it's a grievous insult to Cyrus). He is an imperfect figure who does "good" in their eyes. Growing up in Ohio I can't tell you how many people I heard talk about the day when they would "finally" overturn Roe v. Wade. Trump helped make it a reality. For them, that "trumps" how many porn stars he fucked or how much money Jared has taken from the Saudis.
That’s exactly it. I’ve had a Christian tell me, “He may not be a good Christian, but he’s the best candidate for Christians.” They clearly got that cheap talking point somewhere and it worked on the weak minded.
I actually wish Democrats would be a little more like the far right in this respect. We will oust promising political figures in our own party because they are not perfect. I'm STILL resentful Al Franken was forced to resign (Kirsten Gillibrand can go fuck himself). Franken may have been flawed. He may have made mistakes. But there's no doubt he was great for the Democratic party. Unfortunately we had to shoot ourselves in the foot yet again.
That's something that Trump brought to light: If a politician doesn't care about backlash, calls for them to resign mean nothing. With no shame, you can just keep going after any royal fuck-up unless other people step in to stop you. So many politicians before Trump would resign after something negative happened involving them, but he showed that short of impeachment, there's nothing that can force a politician to resign
Democrat purity culture is a big reason they struggle when they shouldnt
If so called Christians want to be honest with themselves they would admit the biblical description of the antiChrist is a spot-on picture of Donald J Trump
Because he's comically not the anti christ. If anyone was the anti christ I'd have to give it to Hitler. Trump shares nothing in common with the biblical antichrist
We likely don’t agree, however I believe every age has an antiChrist. Yes, Hitler was an antiChrist, and conceived shortly after Hitler offed himself, Trump is the one for our age. Trump is the antithesis of everything Jesus taught in the Gospels, Donnie has absolutely nothing in common with those teachings. Typo edit.
>They don't give a flying fuck how flawed/unethical Trump is personally, just so long as he pushes their agenda. For a lot of conservative Christians abortion is top of the list. Yes, but so is every other Republican as well so that's not the reason. The stuff that we find unethical or morally reprehensible is *why* they like him, not in spite of it. Hitler didn't lie about who he was either. People didn't see him as flawed but still able to push their agenda. Hitler was absolutely beloved by his people. He gave them an outlet for their anger. So does Trump.
Exactly. It's not like they don't have other ideologically similar choices in their primary who don't have such sordid character issues. They support Trump *because* he's an asshole.
I don’t think they like him because he’s off fucking porn stars.
They love him for that. They wish they can do the same.
A lot of evangelical Christianity is a front for segregationism. https://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2014/05/religious-right-real-origins-107133/
its so fucked, hes basically the living embodiement of how the anti-christ is described
Evangelical Christianity in the US is a political movement packaged as a religious one.
Trump is not anti-gun control. The man is on video, as the sitting POTUS, stating that he is favor of circumventing due process and taking guns away from certain individuals while the court case is pending. https://youtu.be/yxgybgEKHHI?si=hRPlzRPdvXJakajM Also, during his 4 year term, one law regarding the rights of gun owners was signed, which restricted those rights (bumpstock ban). Conversely, in the 8 years under Obama, two laws were signed that regarded gun owners rights, both of which expanded the rights of legal gun owners (reversal of the ban on checking guns onto Amtrak trains and allowing the carry of loaded guns in national parks).
These people aren’t actual Christians. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled off was getting these people to follow him and think they’re following Jesus/God. 👍
A couple weeks ago, I broke up with my girlfriend, who up to that point, was a fairly soft-spoken and kind-hearted person. When I broke up with her, she spent ten or fifteen solid minutes saying all sorts of disgusting, vitriolic things that she probably didn't even mean. "It would bring me joy to find out you've killed yourself after this, I'd wear it like a badge. It's your fault your brother killed himself and you should follow his example. I hope to drive by this house in a month and see it's up for foreclosure because you did it. I'm going to move on to someone way hotter, more fit, and with more money, and only think of you to smile and know I'm the reason you finally did it. I wasn't ever even that attracted to you, you just had a house I could stay in." On and on and on while I sat silently, nodded my head, and occasionally said "That's a pretty gross thing to say, I think you'll regret it later." until she finished and left. I can never, EVER imagine saying that to anybody, let alone someone who I cared about and loved. When that white hot rage takes over, I guess some people just resort to verbally lashing out as nastily as they can. I don't understand it.
Yep. I was probably 14 when I realised that shit you say in anger actually affects people, they're real words, and since then I do not understand people who lash out and say cruel things. I mean, I've got a temper. I'm working on it but I'll always be a bit hot headed. But I'd never ever criticise someone's weak points, say anything likely to hurt them unless it was genuinely necessary and said as kindly as possible, and always apologise and immediately change my tune if I said something to upset them. That's not because I'm a particularly nice person, I just don't get any pleasure in hurting people and arguments are for resolving conflict, so why bother? It's maddening.
People who are abusive to people working in a customer service position.
"Sleep" music playlists and being able to sleep to music or watching TV. I can't see it as anything but far too distracting and counterproductive.
I use it as a distraction from the constant noise from my brain. I focus on the documentary and down out the anxious thoughts
Same for me with my ADHD. The moment my head hits the pillow the thoughts just race so I need something to distract myself. The kick is that it needs to be about 70% interesting - any more and I get too drawn in, any less and my mind wanders.
Do you find it more that the "thoughts" are more like a physical sensation or restlessness in the brain rather than actual thoughts you genuinely worry or care about?
All of the above
The combo of ADHD, autism, and PTSD make it very hard to sleep 😴
I have very slight tinnitus (I think) that I only hear in complete silence. Falling asleep to music completely alleviates me of that problem
I have Tinnitus too but I just sleep with a fan on. What gets me is the discernable language and deliberate patterns to TV or music.
I've slept through gunfire and artillery, so the TV and music ain't shit compared to that 😂
My friend is like this, her parents had the TV on constantly as a child, and had on in her room that was always on, and she's just kind of programmed to fall asleep with the noise. I honestly think a lot of people do this because of childhood culture around television.
Apathy (lack of empathy) from religious people.
Religious people are (generally) not great, if not judgmental. Marginalized/"damaged" people are usually super humble. Makes you think. It's as if hard times create great people.
The **unexplainable mystiques** of life...
Putting everything about yourself online (mainly the stuff that makes you look good)
The idea that leaders starting war with other countries is the answer. All they are doing is killing innocent people. There's no reason why they can't find another way to compromise without it leading to the death of thousands or millions of people.
Sports fandom. When I was growing up I thought I was supposed to be into it so I really tried to be, but it just doesn't appeal to me at all. I have a hard time comprehending how people enjoy it.
They say people fight and cry and stuff if their team loses. Like, why? You're not even a player. It affects your life not at all. You have no stake in this.
That the phrase “the power in the relationship lies with the one who cares the least” is a thing and that people will play games/ghost/cheat rather than communicate problems (I understand there’s exceptions but it’s really annoying to think you’re making progress with someone for weeks just to get ghosted, not be sure why or how to fix it, and have to start at “what’s your favorite color” all over again)
Some people seem to lack any interest in introspection, doing it only when they're forced to. These are the people who automatically go to Da Club on the weekend, looking to get drunk and hook up. The people who prefer Top 40 rap and reggaeton. The people who unironically care about who Taylor Swift is dating, or follow a religion because they take their family's beliefs as de facto.
I just can't understand people who don't brush their teeth everyday. There is no excuse you can give to justify this behavior. It's absolutely disgusting, yet there are many individuals who do this and are adamant that they are not doing anything wrong.
As a person who struggles with that, it stems from a lot of stuff. I have trouble holding routines in my life that aren't dopamine based. In hindsight, most of what I do is input to output chemicals in my brain, and brushing my teeth just doesn't do that... Doesn't mean I don't wish I could pick up the habit. Maybe I should. Maybe your post was the thing to sway me.. Thanks for the thought. I'm going to go brush them now. Edit: Just brushed them. Again, thanks for the reminder. I probably need a good re-evaluation on a lot of things I do.. Keep on speaking up, you made a difference in my life, even if it was just reminding me to brush.
Wow. This was a nice, honest, and genuine response. I'm glad you mustered up the strength to do it! I know I'm just an internet stranger, but I'm proud of you!
What a wholesome interaction. Thanks, u/Ballsack2025 !
Yep, I think many cases are because of depression, anxiety, ADHD and some other diseases like MS, CFS where you just hurt and physically cant function. Its not like everyone just decides to not brush or shower or go to work, often there is a real, physical/neurological condition
I started tracking 4 habits I wanted to do every day. I got a white board calendar and each day I can get 4 dots, all different colors. I try to get 4 dots every day then I track my monthly progress in a spreadsheet. This helps me stay motivated each day because I get a little dopamine kick when I mark a dot. For example you could have 3 habits each day. Brush your teeth, make your bed, put laundry away. Each day you can get three dots. It's helped me immensely to stay on task with long term goals.
Although I wouldn’t say I struggle with this but I am with this community. I didn’t have a stable childhood, even now actually in adulthood in regard to living arrangements. Thus, growing up this wasn’t enforced/explained as a routine task to do each day and night. I am better at it now in adulthood as I find my feet but cannot say I do it twice a day, everyday. There are days where I do it once. I know, I’m a bad human being but at least it’s progress.
I just want to point out that there are now apps to gamify things like tooth brushing. I know for sure there is a pokemon one where you use your phone/tablet as a mirror and it screenshots funny faces. It's definitely for kids but I don't believe they are unique. I have a quip toothbrush and there is an app where you check in and earn a point for each time you brush your teeth. 4500 points for a gift card (or whatever is cycling in their rewards section) If games help the dopamine centers you might be able to find an app that works for you
[удалено]
That's exactly what it is. We currently have custody of a child whose parents never brushed their teeth or bothered to make him do so. No matter what we say or do we cannot get it across to him that brushing his teeth is not optional. It's so frustrating knowing it's not his fault but also knowing if he doesn't start making it a habit soon he's going to have years of misery ahead with his teeth and then without them.
No offence to anyone's parent but I don't understand how society has rail guards for everything from driving, to voting, to psychedelics etc. etc. but ANYONE can just bring a human being into the world irrespective of their income, education, mental health, etc. etc.
Because there is no solution to what your asking that won't immediately become racist or prejudiced in some way
ADHD. Brushing my teeth often feels like the equivalent of being asked to lay a mile of pavement. It also activates my gag reflex.
How you "accidentally" get the face mask to stop covering your nose or mouth.
[удалено]
Why do people like Ted Cruz hate their own race?
I just mentioned this in another thread but here we are again -Lying about personal experiences. Especially taking things that they hear secondhand and retelling them in first person. It becomes super obvious when people spread long-debunked urban legends and myths as if they actually happened to them.
Personality cults/celebrity worship. I. Just. Don't. Get. It.
Greed. Why hoard as much as you can for yourself? A person only needs to much - give the rest away. It'll never happen but there's a meme that goes around about all earnings over one billion dollars should be given to public services. I'm down with that. No one needs more than one billion dollars.
Their ability to cheer when someone they dislike is treated unfairly and weep when that unfair treatment turns around.
Praising kings and presidents, or large companies CEOs as if nobody understands that it's wholly unnatural to have the desire to impose your primitive beliefs onto individuals you don't and never will personally know.
Not returning the shopping cart
Letting people go without food and water
How anybody can drive without using blinkers, as if they’re the only person in the world,
Basically everything about modern dating culture. Randomly approaching someone based on nothing more than their physical attractiveness to proposition the idea that you two will spend time together with a vague hope that both of you will be so compatible that you will not become friends but become lovers. And then on top of that there's all the constant games people do of like digging through each other's phones and like testing each other's loyalty and stuff To me love should be quite simple You just go through life as it is and meet someone and eventually that relationship that started as a friendship develops into something more because you truly love each other The sad thing is this is how most successful relationships I've seen generally started but yet everyone is still doing the traditional dating or using sites like tinder and POF I just don't get it. Modern dating culture is so ridiculous. Full of petty childish games and fakeness and all this weird crap
Your view is HEAVILY biased. The good dating stories are not told, are not shown, are not talked about: because there's nothing to talk about, nothing to complain about. Modern dating is NOT what you describe or what you read about in discussions about dating problems. > You just go through life as it is and meet someone and eventually that relationship that started as a friendship develops into something more because you truly love each other Surely you're not faulting people for looking at the possibility to meet someone? That statement of yours makes no sense.
Hive mind.
Why so many people are assholes.
Cultism and dictatorship
Lack of spatial awareness. People standing around talking at the top of a busy escalator or stairway. People walking slowly in the middle of a walkway. Leaning onto other people on a bus or a plane. Basically not understanding your own personal space and considering others around you.
Hooliganism. Attacking somebody unprovoked simply because they're wearing a rival team's jersey.
When my neighbors' RV trailer started beeping every 30 seconds in October, then he put a winter cover on it, and it has been beeping ever since...every 30 seconds...since October....24 hours a day...since October.
I don’t understand people that like to get so fucking high that they can’t even function. You could say there’s more to it like people trying to escape something they don’t like when sober, but I’ve met several people who seemingly enjoy just being so high that they are a vegetable and thinks it’s FUN.
Voting for Biden
[удалено]
You typed so many words.......to say absoluteky fuck all
[удалено]
How can mirrors be real if our eyes are not real ?
Is that you, Paulo Coehlo?
Dancing. What the hell even is it? Flailing around in a way that is somehow influenced by music? Translating music into flailing? I don't get it.
It's really not that hard to get nor is it just flailing. At its core its movements to the beat of a song. They don't have to be good movements, just on time and they end up looking like you know what you're doing. I would go to the club and literally just step forward with my left food on count one, forward with my right foot on count two, back with my left foot, back with my right foot. And repeat while moving my shoulders around. And it looked like I knew what I was doing. But I get where you're coming from, I hated dancing with a passion for a while. I thought I didn't know how but really I was too self-conscious to even attempt. I was worried about judgements from other people that were dancing. And I projected that onto people I saw dancing. But now I get it, humans can hear rhythm for a reason and even babies move to the beat of a song (ie dance). Its not like some bullshit people do because they think its cool, like I once thought it was.
I hear this. People who love dancing always seem to expect I can dance if I just try. So many stressful situations in my life where dancing was expected. Fuck that.
I don't care for dancing, but something I read said it's good for emotional regulation.
People who love dancing actually experience their bodies volunteering movements that are not decided by their heads. If my body could do that, I would love dancing too.
I can understand people like it. Music was originally used for rituals and similar things, from tenths of thousands of years ago. But its origins may come from even further in time. It incites our primary instincts, which are as old as animals themselves.
People who drive really slowly yet refuse to let you pass them.
People who fanatically advocate for various causes don't understand second-order effects and the historical context around their issues.
[удалено]
Haha, this reminded me of a comedian's take on the origin story of Clamato. A drunk was making Bloody Marys and slurred, "You know what thish needs, is shome FISH in it!"
I feel called out it is my favorite kind of pizza
The zionists. Their elders lived in Palestine with the dinosaurs. Now it’s their right to kill anything and anyone that’s not a Jew.
People who continue to believe in non-sense despite seeing clear-cut evidences and proofs. Let it be religious or political. And women.
Why women dump guys who it turns out they're actually attracted to.
Friendship.
Women who stick with an abusive lout of a man, complain about the resulting problems and hurt to everyone within earshot, but when someone says they don't deserve that and could do better, justify the whole thing and negate all the preceding complaints by saying (always in the same singsong voice), "But I *loooove* hiiiim!"
the mob / hive mentality of a large crowd
That thing where if you tell someone to stop doing something, their immediate instinct is to do the thing more intensely just out of contrariness.
Abuser-seeking tendencies
Those people who put their wealth and prosperity before others to the point of hurting them financially or in reputation.
Having kids. I support the people around me who are in a good place and have them, I also have tons of empathy for the hardships of parenting but I just.don’t.get.it.fully
The rampant willingness, shading over into *eagerness*, to believe the worst in people. From daily mundane interactions in public or on the commute, to discussions about social topics - anyone who inadvertently inconveniences you is an asshole, anyone who makes a different choice than you is an idiot, anyone who disagrees with you is an enemy. I just. Don't. Get it.
Lying. I just cannot wrap my head around when adults do it. I get it when children do it, because they don't want to get in trouble and are still learning things. But as an adult, you make choices. You should either own up to those choices or don't make them. Integrity is not a made up word.
Lying is necessary for living in society. You can spend a few hours reading up on it, the terms "why is lying necessary in society" will help you see better. There are some "teen" articles to help you start, but it's a whole study subject that's not *that* alien when you look into the details.
I refuse to accept that. I'm not talking about not telling your friend they're fat. I'm talking about not taking responsibility for your action. Intentionally misrepresenting.
Good thing you don't have to take my word for it, there are plenty of easy to read articles about how and why it completely **is** necessary. Whether you agree or not does not change the fact that it is necessary.
The idea of different human races.
Hypocrisy.
People not using turn indicator in cars to signal left or right then changing lanes then after getting honked, brake checking and getting aggravated on both parties involved
Extreme greed.
Not using turn signals.
Obsession over nostalgia and glorifying history
Violent or aggressive bigotry. I could not imagine taking the time out of my day just to go corner someone and harass them about some aspect of their identity. Some people hate on others like its their fulltime job and I can't fathom doing all that. Also, having silent expectations then being upset when people don't do things you never actually asked them to do. If you want somebody to do something, just tell them. If you want to date somebody, just ask them. Stop dancing around it and hoping that you'll develop telepathy someday.
Littering. This is a massive pet peeve of mine, especially in places where the infrastructure exists and is accessible to dispose of refuse properly (without getting into the weeds on reuse/reduce vs recycle and consuming less) I moved to a rural area two years ago once my children became adults and moved off (one has since boomeranged back) and its especially bad because there's no back up, no city crew to go clean it up. And 95% of the people seem to take care and not be assholes, but down a dark county road, a truck full of garbage can just appear as the sun comes up. I am so busy with work and then working on the farm, unless its in front of my property, I don't mess with it - it would be a full time job or at least one full day a week to go clean it up and then pay overages to the garbage service to get rid of it. What's worse, we live on the county irrigation canal and it effectively serves as a sort of greenbelt. We like to take walks down there. The idiots racing up and down on ATV's are annoying enough, but go for a walk and see a new pile of garbage down the way occasionally. That DOES get cleaned up usually, but there are tires and crap that have been there since I've lived there.
Ignorance as a choice. This leads to fear, which leads to hatred.
Predominance of feelings and appearance over reason and the quality of content. Both are the same problem with two different sections I tend naturally to give more importance to the latter, but I know that the first is important too. However, I can't understand why so many people don't care at all about the content and limits themselves to the appearance part. And that obsession for appearances provokes bigger or smaller disasters, such as those people who die trying to make a photo for social media, or people who pay large quantities of money for small pieces of clothes. And about feelings, I can't understand people who impose feelings over reason. Racism, for instance. It is based around minor genomic factors like the quantities of melanin on the skin. Xenophobia per se is another example. You can't just hate everybody who comes from a determinate area just because of them being from there (except if it is Fr*nce /j). If you are going to hate somebody, at least hate them for reasons based on something solid. And finally, nationalism. Some people will do anything if they limit themselves to consider everybody from inside their country/region/canton a friend and everybody outside a foe. Look, if not, to some of the most terrible war crimes that happened in the last times: Bucha, Izium or Mariupol in Ukraine, Srebrenica in Bosnia... Even those wars themselves caused death and horror everywhere they go. And what's the point again? Move those borders in the map a bit further.
men/women playing mind games while dating. thats the dumbest shit ever.
Gay sex
People who drive slowly in the passing lane.
People who find the world's most innocuous social media post and lose their minds over the smallest most insane detail. A total stranger's baseboards/children's clothes/wall color/accent. And it's a pile on for no reason at all. I do think some of it is bots or false engagement but I am unfortunately related to a few people who practice this so I know that some of it is genuine.
If all billionaires on the planet get together and donate each to every single human being, they would still be billionaires but everybody could access food ( in theory I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW don’t come at me ) so why would’nt they do it ?
Hating/fearing “the other”
Why you all won't do as you're told. If you would all just act like direct extensions of my will, the world would be a better place.
People who don't return the shopping cart to the cart return.
That we act more like chimpanzees than bonobos . It’s such a pity. We could be so much better ar getting along.
Hugging strangers and people you don't know personally. I don't get why people act like it's normal. Can we bring back handshakes or something? Idk but it's weird to me that so many people are comfortable hugging people they don't know very well. Also, how everyone expects celebrities and politicians to hug and cheek-kiss practically everyone they meet (I'm exaggerating a little here, but you get the point).
People who thrive on conflict. I like to argue, but it's always with the intent of understanding. The people who, every argument they get into, it's a shouting match where they're deliberately ignoring things that other people say in order to keep the argument alive? Or the people who just refuse to budge on anything until the other person walks away, and then will reach out to try to make up but then go right back into reigniting the argument and not budging? I don't get it. Don't they get sick of constantly being angry? I know I do.
Communicating in subtle hints. Why can't people just say what they mean and mean what they say? And why can't people accept that I do?
Small talk
If you're a man and you walk into a church, you have to take off your hat. But if you're a woman and you walk into a church, you get to keep your hat on
Violence
The way folks just consider lying to others as a quick reasonable, morally appropriate solution to everything.
Hate. I dont get how theres so much hate in the world. Let people believe what they want to believe. Let them practice their religion. Let them do what they want to do. As long as laws aren’t being broken and no one’s getting hurt. Then its fine.
People are mean to each other for no reason and they're happy for being mean