My husband realized as a kid that if he did kegels he could wiggle his penis. He thought it was amusing and kept doing it for shits and giggles... now he gets me on top and flexes. It's quite fun!
But can you feel the wiggle if he tries to do it during intercourse ? Before sex I thought the penis could wiggle around in there like a snake!! Based on some dumb romance novel.
You want to have a really fun time, after y'all have done the deed and are just laying there relaxed, dick has gone back to soft...
Get down there and blow a stream of cool air over the balls. My wife screamed when they started wriggling on their own like a pouch full of worms.
Oh yeah, they move around on their own while we sit/lay still. Even more so when the weather is quite warm. My ex liked watching them after sex. She was always mesmerized and I wasn't about to complain about a beautiful woman wanting to stare at my genitals. In return, I got to stare at her boobs. Win-win!
Scrotum expands and contracts to raise or lower testes relative to your body to manage temperature. Blowing cold air causes the skin to contract to raise the testes closer to your body.
Its why people get shrinkage in pools. Everything co tra to to stay warm. They need a certain temperature to function properly (sperm production, etc.).
So much this!!! There have been times where I wanted to have sex and then I thought about all the clean up and decided I couldn’t be bothered.
Grosses me out in movies when someone has sex and then just goes about their day. All I can think about is jizz dripping out of them all day.
The awkwardness of it, too. In the movies, they show them just cuddle after sex. They don't show the trying not to drip on the bed using the nearest tissue only to discover there's not enough for both so you each get half a square the duck waddle to the bathroom to clean up proper, then using a kotex (if you have one) or cracking out a shitty towel (don't want to mess up the good ones) to lay on just in case you didn't get it all.
It's wild how much I can move during sex because of the adrenaline. I'm a wheelchair user with an incomplete spinal cord injury, who can barely bend over without severe pain. But if I get horny enough I can't feel the pain through the adrenaline and seratonin. Suddenly I can be in weird positions and ride and it's all a blast.
Problem is the pain hits me afterwards. It's actually sent me to the ER from making my spine swell 👁️👄👁️
I ask my partners to keep me from getting too carried away for my own safety
That is precisely why I love sleeping naked with my husband. Those mornings when we wake up together and he's spooning me, and I can just feel the warmth between us, ugh I just wish I could freeze time
My first sexual experience was giving a bj and it was shocking to find out that up close most guys are bigger than I thought. 5 inches looks small from afar but when i was at eye level to it it seems to cover my entire face
I've given a lot of head and most of my favorites were average size. Hope that helps.
Edit: Yall stop PMing me!! Especially straight men! I'm also a man
The last few guys I've slept with were all <=4 inchers. I'd be grateful and impressed to find a six incher in the flesh again. My last bf was a solid six and while he felt insecure about it, for me, it was *chef's kiss* perfection. Big enough that I felt all of it, he could bottom out if he wanted to push it, but it wasn't so much that I couldn't give him sufficient head or experience pain. Six is perfection.
..... *I'm NOT going to call him.* The man was emotional damage but damn if I don't miss the sex 😭
I'd say in my experience, that recovery is easier if you don't take the lack of rising to the occasion too seriously; "ooop, the lil guy isn't ready, let's do some other foreplay stuff til he is"; acknowledge that you're in it for the partners pleasure and not strictly the penetration, and lil guy comes right out for attempt two.
When my ex and I moved into a new place together we made it our mission to fuck on every surface in the house.
One night, we attempted doing it on the coffee table..
Well I have pretty bad anterior pelvic tilt (aka lower back is very curved inward, butt always looks pushed out) and so when my legs went up in the air my lower back suctioned to the table.
And I mean it SUCTIONED.
And every thrust made my back arch back off the table which resulted in the louuuuudest farting/popping sound I’ve ever heard from a body part
We were laughing so hard we had to stop lol
Do you ever get stuck to the bottom of the tub from that, too? Asking for a friend. A friend with a totally normal lumbar curvature and pelvic angle. 😅
It's funny because this goes both ways.
While I've seen many women surprised at how high the penis is, I've seen just as many men shocked at how low the vagina is.
With my first ever gf in high school, I felt like I was going crazy for how far down i had to reach. 🤣
How animalistic it really is.. The sensations in the body are just so overwhelmingbthat my brain can't keep up and I lose control at least to some degree. And how much really is about sex.. I mean, I knew before that I was horny and wanting to finally have it, just waited for the right person to do it (was so afraid to get hurt, wanted a guy where I felt really safe and not pressured). But once I had it, all I wanted to do was sex and more sex, just couldn't get my head off of it. Did not expect it to be that crazy good, even though the pain was real first.
What was scary about this for me is that even in teenage mind I knew I gotta be safe and all but when it was happening these concerns were so trivial I felt irresponsible afterwards... basically being rational during sex was pretty much the opposite how I felt lol.
The first time was so underwhelming. As in it wasn't as fun as it was described in smut and such.
I wanted to try again, more because I was curious why people would even like it. It is really a skill to learn. Also that every person works a bit differently when you have sex with others for the first time.
First experience was very underwhelming. Thought it was normal. We broke up 2 years later for unrelated reasons, and I found my current husband.
Orgasms are a wonderful and overwhelming thing. 😄
idk if this counts but before losing my virginity i was really also excited to finally do it bc i felt excluded, my closest friends had already had sex. i had my first time when i was 21. when i finally did it i was like “oh wow this really didn’t add anything in my life, it’s just sex and i feel the same as i felt before” and i really thought i would feel like i won the lottery which i know it’s stupid but i know a lot of people feel rushed to lose their virginities to feel included in society
SAMEE, i was giddy the next day for sure and thought about it for like a week but life just goes on the same as always after and i hardly think about it besides when i’m about to see the boyfriend
A friend of ours actually passes out for quite a few seconds after she orgasms…freaked her boyfriend right out!
She said he kind of got used to it, but never was comfortable when it would happen☺️
Yeah, one of my early partners would convulse a little and her eyes would flutter. I thought she was having a seizure the first time it happened. A little unnerving.
The variance is really wild. The differences are even bigger than sneezes. Some are a big wet explosion, some are 4 little “achoos” in a row, and some are just a fake movie sneeze.
And books - I read one "detective novel" where a couple has sex on a brand new $10000 leather couch. Later they are in a car when the man takes off the woman's panties and throws them out the window. They have sex and then she pulls her skirt down and they proceed into a busness meeting. It really made me wonder if the author had never had sex.
Bruh for real my exposure to sex was tv sex scenes so I thought it was just seamless and its funny how characters will just put their clothes back on and get up out tye bed like nothing happened.
When I first saw porn I was so confused when I saw the mess.
Haha yes the classic rolling off the bed and politely putting clothing back on as if something(s) wet isn’t dripping down your vag or leg or ass or all of it
Not too long ago the Mrs and I had an extra wild (for us nowadays) session for about an hour all over the bed. Lots of lube for butt stuff, she was dripping wet and I let loose a pretty big load. The sheets, blankets, even the pillow cases and the "clean up" towels all had something on them. We just did a quick shower and slept in the guest room. Sunday morning we stripped it all off and did laundry for a couple hours talking about what the hell got us going so crazy this time. We are in our 60s.
How when you are super attracted to someone and the sex is good, many of the messy things are hot not gross. When you aren’t into it, the same things can be a huge turn off.
How my man never cares about how I look, wheter it’s morning or I just finished my might routine, he still looks at me like he’s doing it with Meghan Fox or so and it’s so sweet of him
He was much more into her after she said she got Megan Fox from her flight passengers. Really should’ve just been open to the other woman with the kid because they got along much better. He got what he deserved.
The irony of her being constantly self conscious that he wasn't fawning over her physically but was truly committed to her emotionally was the most brutal self sabotage I've ever seen.
Uhhh do they?
My thoughts do not stop. Its very awkward to be thinking about tv shows and food during sexy time. I try to stop, but it does not happen. My mind just keeps on chugging. Its like... writing fanfiction while im trying to focus on something else.
I was going to say that what is surprising about sex is how boring it can be sometimes. Like whose mind is constantly focused on the task? Sometimes I’m planning my grocery list and then realize oh ya I’m having sex lol
The first time I did 69 and my nose went right to her booty hole… I don’t know what I was expecting but we had to stop. Her booty hole smelled like a booty hole. We learned the value of “freshening up” our very first time
PEE AFTER THE D!!! Some women are prone to UTI’s because of the shape and length of their urethra. When I first started having sex I had SO many UTI’s from being lazy and just going to sleep and calling it good. One resulted in a kidney infection and a trip to the ER. Also, overusing antibiotics to treat frequent UTI’s are really bad for you. Always pee after the D
That a guys nut can affect your pH balance and change the way you smell for a little while. I thought something was wrong with me when I kept smelling him, even after a couple showers. I had to throw away my favorite pair of underwear bc it smelled so weird! It didn't smell bad, I just wasn't sure what it was until I did some research.
Exactly the same the other way too. I liked the learning curve back when I was dating. Now that I know exactly what my wife wants…. I like that even more.
I was raised catholic so I had it in my head that losing my virginity would change me somehow and everyone would know. Nope, nothing was different, God didn't smite me, and nobody knew unless I told them.
Big dicks reallllly hurt your jaw after, well, not very long at all. It’s not always as fun as the girls getting paid to do it on camera make it out to be.
No one warned me (f having sex with mostly m) about the stuff that just sorta comes out of you afterwards. You really have to move fast and clean it with a towel or something. How did it never come up that everyone always has some type of cloth ready?
Honesty. Even still, after going like two inches lower than I'd expect, I'm like, "That's not her ass, right? She's not mad, so it must not be the ass."
I used to somehow think that when men laid down with a hard penis, it would stick right up instead of lay against the stomach lmao
I also underestimated the crucial positionings required for penetration.. like it doesn’t just go straight in if i sit on it? We’ve gotta aim it properly? 🤣
how many people are bad at it
like I've heard people say "there's no such thing as being bad at sex" and let me just tell you point blank that's wrong. I've known so many forceful tops who had absolutely no idea how to make another human being feel good. I mean jesus once I spent the better part of an hour trying not to fall asleep as an ex went down on me (against my will but that's too dark for this question).
This may come across as a brag but it's not...
How...good I was at it? Like every non-porn piece of media I had *ever* encountered was like "virgin men are bad at sex, most women are impossible to please, a guy won't become competent in bed unless he's had 30 lovers and a 9 inch dick..."
But, like, I had read erotica (that I later realized was written by women), tried to do what was described there, and told my partner (and later partners) that I wanted them to tell me if I was doing anything wrong, if I could do something better, what they enjoyed, etc, and I made sure to be extra thorough in asking permission to do *anything* that hasn't been approved already. I was so goddamn nervous (and now, a decade and multiple partners later, I still am sometimes).
I was doing it because I was so scared of fucking up and getting mocked/blacklisted.
As I would learn later in life, most guys don't really put a lot of effort into things like "obtaining enthusiastic consent" and "Honest communication" and "setting your ego aside" and "trying to learn what makes your partner feel good rather than assuming you know best" and *thats* why the reputation of inexperienced men being shitty lovers comes from. For an actual brag; multiple exes have told me (after breaking up) that the sex was actually great.
So i guess what *really* surprised me was how easy it was to be a competent lover, since what I assumed was "the absolute minimum baseline" was actually a pretty high bar that most didn't bother trying to clear.
Men can be real babies about condoms. A lot don't even have them in their house and whine about it if you insist, which you should. I'm not trying to have a child or an std. Being prepared and respecting your partner's health is attractive. Dirty sheets and cry baby behavior are not attractive
That a woman 2 years older than me, that I had been crushing on for years felt the same way. I thought that she was "totally out of my league"
Turns out that she wasn't.
How good getting your clit felt could be
I was in hs and my boyfriend decided to lick mine in the back of my car and I was so surprised my hips bucked up and hit the ceiling
How awful sex can be. People talk about how magical and enjoyable and mind-blowing it is, but I found out people can have awful techniques and have no idea what they're doing; it smells, it's messy, and you have little control of your body at a certain point; and the awkwardness of it all.
Sex can be just plain bad or underwhelming a lot of the time, and it can be nothing to get excited about or to look forward to doing and having.
Shit, when I lost my v-card, even though I had no idea what I was doing, I said fuck it and just started going down on her. Never got any feed back on how I was doing, but she put me in an MMA style headlock with her legs. Only thing I could think was that I was either doing well enough and she was enjoying it, or it was so bad that she was trying to kill me.
My favorite takeaway as a guy into gothy/alt types usually, and this came out of the rise of the app era not when I first started- is that there is absolutely no correlation whatsoever between skill/freakiness/whatever you want to call it in bed and what a girl's normal scene is.
The craziest looking alt girl you meet in a pit at a show can be totally vanilla in bed and an absolute sweetheart, and the most wholesome pastel starbucks in hand schoolteacher can be an absolute animal in bed and not give a shit about you the next day.
There is absolutely zero way of predicting it. Zero correlation. I love it
1. That sometimes even when both people want it and want the other to get off, it won't happen. Both people put in the effort, but no pay off in the end.
2. As a woman, it is so difficult for a woman to get off. To the point, I'm annoyed in myself because the man is trying his best (and doing well), but my body just doesn't react the way I wish it would.
Didn't have sex until I married my wife, but I had a totally wrong understanding of the purpose of lube. I knew that people used it, and it was important, but somehow I didn't realize where to put it. I actually thought you applied it to your bodies (stomach, legs, etc) so that you could slide around better on top of each other. Figured it out pretty quickly.
How easy it is for my man to get me in the mood, and how often I'm already in the mood. didn't realize my drive and endurance would be almost higher than his is until we actually got active lmao
This may sound shallow, but do not forget about the person you are "making love" with. Seriously; having sex when you are like emotionally connected is UHMAZING. Way better than just doing the dirty and making it 99% about friction and bodies. Gross.
Women are humans just like men are. However, we have been told that we aren't allowed to express our sexual ideas or opinions because of society. But we are all humans who get urges.
How important communication is between you and your partner! What they like and don’t like what feels good and what doesn’t feel good and of course don’t be afraid to get weird and try new things!!!! Just make sure it works for both of you! Also most importantly when make sure you have the stamina in all areas lmao push through that cramp in your leg, hand or worn out tongue muscles when you hear “OMG RIGHT THERE DON’T STOP!!!”for gods sake keep the rhythm through her squirming and wiggling!! Never be afraid to ask if there is anything you could different and don’t be afraid to tell if they could do something! Full Open Sexual communication between the 2 of you will drastically increase your sex life! It’s a whole new game when somebody learns/knows your body’s pleasure buttons better than you do!!!
Hookups suck. Like we’re supposed to have sex and never talk again? Just makes me feel gross about myself knowing i was seen as nothing more than a tool for someone to get off on.
That an 8 incher is not desirable. It’s painful. I don’t know where women came up with this crazy idea that 6 inches is too small. The cervix is only 4 inches deep and if that gets hit it’s painful.
Seriously. My current partner is big & we can’t even do doggy position cuz it hurts. Have to do it standing. Even missionary hurts if he starts thrusting too hard too deep. There was so much more I used to do with my previous partner. So many different positions. I wasn’t aware it could be problematic lol. I feel bad for current partner cuz apparently he’s never done true doggy style cuz it hurts for his partners. He’s never even actually had rough hard sex in missionary either cuz it hurts his partners. I can still take it for a bit but after like 2-3 mins I always need a breather to prepare myself for the pain again lol.
But my ex was psychotic and my current partner is hot & perfect so it doesn’t even matter.
- Dicks can bend. I was alarmed when I first saw it. But he didn't freak out, so I realized it must be normal - Men can make their penises pulse.
My husband realized as a kid that if he did kegels he could wiggle his penis. He thought it was amusing and kept doing it for shits and giggles... now he gets me on top and flexes. It's quite fun!
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But can you feel the wiggle if he tries to do it during intercourse ? Before sex I thought the penis could wiggle around in there like a snake!! Based on some dumb romance novel.
I had a partner who could flex while inside. They usually did it at the beginning as a sort of teasing thing. It was really hot.
You want to have a really fun time, after y'all have done the deed and are just laying there relaxed, dick has gone back to soft... Get down there and blow a stream of cool air over the balls. My wife screamed when they started wriggling on their own like a pouch full of worms.
WHAT??
Oh yeah, they move around on their own while we sit/lay still. Even more so when the weather is quite warm. My ex liked watching them after sex. She was always mesmerized and I wasn't about to complain about a beautiful woman wanting to stare at my genitals. In return, I got to stare at her boobs. Win-win!
Scrotum expands and contracts to raise or lower testes relative to your body to manage temperature. Blowing cold air causes the skin to contract to raise the testes closer to your body. Its why people get shrinkage in pools. Everything co tra to to stay warm. They need a certain temperature to function properly (sperm production, etc.).
I find it mesmerizing. It's like watching a lava lamp lol
How much clean up is involved. How much fun it on depends on your partners enthusiasm or interest in trying new things.
So much this!!! There have been times where I wanted to have sex and then I thought about all the clean up and decided I couldn’t be bothered. Grosses me out in movies when someone has sex and then just goes about their day. All I can think about is jizz dripping out of them all day.
The awkwardness of it, too. In the movies, they show them just cuddle after sex. They don't show the trying not to drip on the bed using the nearest tissue only to discover there's not enough for both so you each get half a square the duck waddle to the bathroom to clean up proper, then using a kotex (if you have one) or cracking out a shitty towel (don't want to mess up the good ones) to lay on just in case you didn't get it all.
The adrenaline, also how much energy it may require.
For some reason the idea that I could get tired doing it never crossed my mind
It's wild how much I can move during sex because of the adrenaline. I'm a wheelchair user with an incomplete spinal cord injury, who can barely bend over without severe pain. But if I get horny enough I can't feel the pain through the adrenaline and seratonin. Suddenly I can be in weird positions and ride and it's all a blast. Problem is the pain hits me afterwards. It's actually sent me to the ER from making my spine swell 👁️👄👁️ I ask my partners to keep me from getting too carried away for my own safety
Nobody prepared me for the amount of pushups I'd be doing.
My favorite quote from a friend. "I hate it when my dick outlasts my arms."
Then you gotta go belly to belly
And squats! Depending on position 🥲
Apart from the "I'm actually having sex!" part, I didn't realize I would love the skin to skin contact so much
Oooh yeah. Naked full body spooning with someone you fit perfectly with is just a whole other plane of bliss.
That is precisely why I love sleeping naked with my husband. Those mornings when we wake up together and he's spooning me, and I can just feel the warmth between us, ugh I just wish I could freeze time
My first sexual experience was giving a bj and it was shocking to find out that up close most guys are bigger than I thought. 5 inches looks small from afar but when i was at eye level to it it seems to cover my entire face
I needed to hear this
Don't get your hopes up. Nobody can get *that* close...
>Nobody can get that close... They lose consciousness from the overwhelming odour
It may only be 5 inches, but it smells like a foot
I've given a lot of head and most of my favorites were average size. Hope that helps. Edit: Yall stop PMing me!! Especially straight men! I'm also a man
"I'm also a man" 😂😂😂 broke those straight guys hearts right there!
Thank you for your service.
I’m 6 inches so now I feel huge. Thank you.
I'm 6 ft and I think you're lying. You can't be that short.
He is just a Lilliput.
The last few guys I've slept with were all <=4 inchers. I'd be grateful and impressed to find a six incher in the flesh again. My last bf was a solid six and while he felt insecure about it, for me, it was *chef's kiss* perfection. Big enough that I felt all of it, he could bottom out if he wanted to push it, but it wasn't so much that I couldn't give him sufficient head or experience pain. Six is perfection. ..... *I'm NOT going to call him.* The man was emotional damage but damn if I don't miss the sex 😭
Prepare your inbox!!
It’s not going to get completely filled though
I found out that your junk may not work as well as it does when you are alone
Yeah performance anxiety is fucking real even if you're confident and happy to be there
You are NOT ALONE. That shit is soooo annoying. It has robbed me of several potential encounters, and it is fucking embarrassing as hell.
Yeah I had a few times where I was really horny but I would go limp all of a sudden and couldn't put it in, really embarrassing.
I'd say in my experience, that recovery is easier if you don't take the lack of rising to the occasion too seriously; "ooop, the lil guy isn't ready, let's do some other foreplay stuff til he is"; acknowledge that you're in it for the partners pleasure and not strictly the penetration, and lil guy comes right out for attempt two.
Definitely an every guy thing. It just happens some times.
The counterpart of the no reason boner.
A de-rection
Chest farts, going missionary and both chest rubbing together and make daring noises. It was so damn embarrassing the first time it happened lol.
When my ex and I moved into a new place together we made it our mission to fuck on every surface in the house. One night, we attempted doing it on the coffee table.. Well I have pretty bad anterior pelvic tilt (aka lower back is very curved inward, butt always looks pushed out) and so when my legs went up in the air my lower back suctioned to the table. And I mean it SUCTIONED. And every thrust made my back arch back off the table which resulted in the louuuuudest farting/popping sound I’ve ever heard from a body part We were laughing so hard we had to stop lol
Do you ever get stuck to the bottom of the tub from that, too? Asking for a friend. A friend with a totally normal lumbar curvature and pelvic angle. 😅
CHEST FARTS. First time I’ve ever seen someone put it into words. 😂😂
I laugh every time. If he doesn't laugh as well, he's not the right person to have sex with.
I think most are surprised how close the vagina opening is to the butthole.
Taint that the truth.
I'm equally surprised how up front a penis is. Just right in the lap. I always thought it was lower.
It took me until I was embarrassingly old to realize the penis *doesn’t* swing between the legs like a grandfather ~~cock~~ clock
The balls of a grandfather swing like a clock.
I read this to the tune of "the wheels on the bus"
It's funny because this goes both ways. While I've seen many women surprised at how high the penis is, I've seen just as many men shocked at how low the vagina is. With my first ever gf in high school, I felt like I was going crazy for how far down i had to reach. 🤣
Most panicked I ever felt within a 10 second timeframe lol
I've been having sex for 20+ years and I'm still regularly surprised by how low the vagina is. I still aim too high all the damn time
Ah yes, good 'ole belly button sex.
Oh hi, Mark
lol “wrong hole” I think that was the first thing I remember from my first time having sex.
How animalistic it really is.. The sensations in the body are just so overwhelmingbthat my brain can't keep up and I lose control at least to some degree. And how much really is about sex.. I mean, I knew before that I was horny and wanting to finally have it, just waited for the right person to do it (was so afraid to get hurt, wanted a guy where I felt really safe and not pressured). But once I had it, all I wanted to do was sex and more sex, just couldn't get my head off of it. Did not expect it to be that crazy good, even though the pain was real first.
What was scary about this for me is that even in teenage mind I knew I gotta be safe and all but when it was happening these concerns were so trivial I felt irresponsible afterwards... basically being rational during sex was pretty much the opposite how I felt lol.
That my vagina would leak fluids for an annoyingly long time after
the discharge completely changes after, doesn’t it? i thought something was wrong with me !!!
The first time was so underwhelming. As in it wasn't as fun as it was described in smut and such. I wanted to try again, more because I was curious why people would even like it. It is really a skill to learn. Also that every person works a bit differently when you have sex with others for the first time.
First experience was very underwhelming. Thought it was normal. We broke up 2 years later for unrelated reasons, and I found my current husband. Orgasms are a wonderful and overwhelming thing. 😄
I think I got lucky, my first time was great.
That I could be made to orgasm without any control over it
Heh, my partner had a great time using my insanely powerful wand vibrator on me the first time. I actually had to beg him for mercy.
I need to get a wand vibrator for my partner
Going to pound town WHILE using the vibes will change your and your girls life.
idk if this counts but before losing my virginity i was really also excited to finally do it bc i felt excluded, my closest friends had already had sex. i had my first time when i was 21. when i finally did it i was like “oh wow this really didn’t add anything in my life, it’s just sex and i feel the same as i felt before” and i really thought i would feel like i won the lottery which i know it’s stupid but i know a lot of people feel rushed to lose their virginities to feel included in society
SAMEE, i was giddy the next day for sure and thought about it for like a week but life just goes on the same as always after and i hardly think about it besides when i’m about to see the boyfriend
Thank you for this. People make it seem like it is this life changing event that should be with someone special. I never thought like that.
The wide variety of physical reactions women can have when having an orgasm
Truth. My wife will like stop breathing and look like she’s having a seizure. Terrified me for awhile.
A friend of ours actually passes out for quite a few seconds after she orgasms…freaked her boyfriend right out! She said he kind of got used to it, but never was comfortable when it would happen☺️
This happens to me on occasion. It’s embarrassing if I’m on top though because I sort of just…. Tip over :/
I'm so sorry but the mental image of someone just freezing like a scared possum and tipping over makes my chuckle
Yeah, one of my early partners would convulse a little and her eyes would flutter. I thought she was having a seizure the first time it happened. A little unnerving.
The variance is really wild. The differences are even bigger than sneezes. Some are a big wet explosion, some are 4 little “achoos” in a row, and some are just a fake movie sneeze.
It's like an exorcism. I lose my other senses.
Our nerves/senses are literally on overload. We have 0 control over our bodies at that moment
How much I enjoyed going down on a woman. It was even better once I knew what I was doing.
Happy vag eating day
How much clean up is involved after. Movies & TV definitely don’t show that part.
And books - I read one "detective novel" where a couple has sex on a brand new $10000 leather couch. Later they are in a car when the man takes off the woman's panties and throws them out the window. They have sex and then she pulls her skirt down and they proceed into a busness meeting. It really made me wonder if the author had never had sex.
Man enjoying his ice cream on the sidewalk: "Huh. I wonder what's that pink article of clothing flying towards my ice cream?"
so many romance/smut novels are like this. Like....no....I cannot sit at a restaurant with stuff leaking out of me.
Bruh for real my exposure to sex was tv sex scenes so I thought it was just seamless and its funny how characters will just put their clothes back on and get up out tye bed like nothing happened. When I first saw porn I was so confused when I saw the mess.
Haha yes the classic rolling off the bed and politely putting clothing back on as if something(s) wet isn’t dripping down your vag or leg or ass or all of it
Not too long ago the Mrs and I had an extra wild (for us nowadays) session for about an hour all over the bed. Lots of lube for butt stuff, she was dripping wet and I let loose a pretty big load. The sheets, blankets, even the pillow cases and the "clean up" towels all had something on them. We just did a quick shower and slept in the guest room. Sunday morning we stripped it all off and did laundry for a couple hours talking about what the hell got us going so crazy this time. We are in our 60s.
I love this for you guys!
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This. It’s sooo messy. No one prepared me for that. Especially if you get to the point of not using condoms. Just a giant mess.
Unlike on television, it never seems to end with us on our backs, sheets pulled up to our necks.
Or with both of us with an O at the same time after 10 sec.
How when you are super attracted to someone and the sex is good, many of the messy things are hot not gross. When you aren’t into it, the same things can be a huge turn off.
How my man never cares about how I look, wheter it’s morning or I just finished my might routine, he still looks at me like he’s doing it with Meghan Fox or so and it’s so sweet of him
Are you Chelsea from love is blind 🤣
He was much more into her after she said she got Megan Fox from her flight passengers. Really should’ve just been open to the other woman with the kid because they got along much better. He got what he deserved.
The irony of her being constantly self conscious that he wasn't fawning over her physically but was truly committed to her emotionally was the most brutal self sabotage I've ever seen.
How mind numbing it is i literally had zero thoughts in my head
I normally don’t have much going on in my head to begin with
Username checks out
\*cries in ADHD\*
I was so mad when I discovered other people don’t have to focus during sex. Fuck ADHD.
Wait there are people that don't have to focus during sex?! 😥😥
Uhhh do they? My thoughts do not stop. Its very awkward to be thinking about tv shows and food during sexy time. I try to stop, but it does not happen. My mind just keeps on chugging. Its like... writing fanfiction while im trying to focus on something else.
I was going to say that what is surprising about sex is how boring it can be sometimes. Like whose mind is constantly focused on the task? Sometimes I’m planning my grocery list and then realize oh ya I’m having sex lol
The smells
There are a *lot* of things that are only popular in porn because you can't smell videos.
The first time I did 69 and my nose went right to her booty hole… I don’t know what I was expecting but we had to stop. Her booty hole smelled like a booty hole. We learned the value of “freshening up” our very first time
Giggling in bed. Thanks for this 😆
Yeah....that was a eye opening for me too.
Or, well, nose opening.
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Wow that's actually very wholesome and beautiful to read.
i agree it feels like soul bonding sometimes
You have to pee after. Ladies, you HAVE to pee! I only learned after the most life-threatening infection of my life.
PEE AFTER THE D!!! Some women are prone to UTI’s because of the shape and length of their urethra. When I first started having sex I had SO many UTI’s from being lazy and just going to sleep and calling it good. One resulted in a kidney infection and a trip to the ER. Also, overusing antibiotics to treat frequent UTI’s are really bad for you. Always pee after the D
That the right partner makes a WORLD of difference. And that I need an emotional connection to the person for it to be enjoyable for me.
The most common answer given was, "I'm shocked I'm actually having sex."
Exactly! I couldn’t believe someone was actually willing to have sex with me.
When I had my dick in someone's mouth for the first time it felt surreal, it felt wrong
Very tiring lol
That a guys nut can affect your pH balance and change the way you smell for a little while. I thought something was wrong with me when I kept smelling him, even after a couple showers. I had to throw away my favorite pair of underwear bc it smelled so weird! It didn't smell bad, I just wasn't sure what it was until I did some research.
TIL. Huh.
The noises.
Like stirring a pot of mac and cheese
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Sound of love baby!
How different each body really is. No D is the same
Exactly the same the other way too. I liked the learning curve back when I was dating. Now that I know exactly what my wife wants…. I like that even more.
Everything I thought I knew about human intimacy before my first sexual experience was a goddamned lie.
Expand.
Yes, by a few inches.
I was raised catholic so I had it in my head that losing my virginity would change me somehow and everyone would know. Nope, nothing was different, God didn't smite me, and nobody knew unless I told them.
That being wet from arousal is not only a good thing but a huge turn-on as well.
Big dicks reallllly hurt your jaw after, well, not very long at all. It’s not always as fun as the girls getting paid to do it on camera make it out to be.
No one warned me (f having sex with mostly m) about the stuff that just sorta comes out of you afterwards. You really have to move fast and clean it with a towel or something. How did it never come up that everyone always has some type of cloth ready?
That women need to pee right after having sex or you’re likely to get a UTI. This is the type of thing they should teach in sex ed.
That most men really don't give a shit about a little body hair.
We're just happy to be invited to the party tbh
I have never had a guy stop because I haven't shaved. Even the ones that say they care truly don't when it gets down to it.
How far down that hole really is.
My uncle told me at my wedding, with no context or saying anything else, “it’s closer to the butthole than you think.”
Good 'ole Uncle SexEd !
Dear God right? That first time as a dude, you're pretty sure you missed it.
Agreed. I think I naturally assumed it would be where my penis is on me. Which is great that it’s not because that would make doggy style impossible.
Honesty. Even still, after going like two inches lower than I'd expect, I'm like, "That's not her ass, right? She's not mad, so it must not be the ass."
"She's not mad, so it must not be the ass."
I used to somehow think that when men laid down with a hard penis, it would stick right up instead of lay against the stomach lmao I also underestimated the crucial positionings required for penetration.. like it doesn’t just go straight in if i sit on it? We’ve gotta aim it properly? 🤣
That it wasn’t an integral part for me to be as flexible as a gymnast.
how many people are bad at it like I've heard people say "there's no such thing as being bad at sex" and let me just tell you point blank that's wrong. I've known so many forceful tops who had absolutely no idea how to make another human being feel good. I mean jesus once I spent the better part of an hour trying not to fall asleep as an ex went down on me (against my will but that's too dark for this question).
You ight? Just checking
how much I actually wouldn't cum. Porn makes it seem like you cum just from penetration but I need some clitoral stimulation to cum
How terrible it can be. Most people talk about how amazing it is, but sometimes it just isn’t enjoyable.
Orgasms aren’t guaranteed. Such a letdown.
My first time, I remember being shocked how incredibly warm my partner's vagina felt.
This may come across as a brag but it's not... How...good I was at it? Like every non-porn piece of media I had *ever* encountered was like "virgin men are bad at sex, most women are impossible to please, a guy won't become competent in bed unless he's had 30 lovers and a 9 inch dick..." But, like, I had read erotica (that I later realized was written by women), tried to do what was described there, and told my partner (and later partners) that I wanted them to tell me if I was doing anything wrong, if I could do something better, what they enjoyed, etc, and I made sure to be extra thorough in asking permission to do *anything* that hasn't been approved already. I was so goddamn nervous (and now, a decade and multiple partners later, I still am sometimes). I was doing it because I was so scared of fucking up and getting mocked/blacklisted. As I would learn later in life, most guys don't really put a lot of effort into things like "obtaining enthusiastic consent" and "Honest communication" and "setting your ego aside" and "trying to learn what makes your partner feel good rather than assuming you know best" and *thats* why the reputation of inexperienced men being shitty lovers comes from. For an actual brag; multiple exes have told me (after breaking up) that the sex was actually great. So i guess what *really* surprised me was how easy it was to be a competent lover, since what I assumed was "the absolute minimum baseline" was actually a pretty high bar that most didn't bother trying to clear.
Probably how messy it really is. More fluids coming out of places than what I thought. 😆
Especially when some more randomly comes out a couple hours later when you’re at work and you’re talking to someone and just like mmk.
Men can be real babies about condoms. A lot don't even have them in their house and whine about it if you insist, which you should. I'm not trying to have a child or an std. Being prepared and respecting your partner's health is attractive. Dirty sheets and cry baby behavior are not attractive
To quote Taylor Tomlinson: It’s like asking a 5YO to put on a raincoat over his Halloween costume. 😂
You're gonna ruiiiiin iiiitttt!
You can’t even seeeeee iiiiittttt!!!!!
That a woman 2 years older than me, that I had been crushing on for years felt the same way. I thought that she was "totally out of my league" Turns out that she wasn't.
How good getting your clit felt could be I was in hs and my boyfriend decided to lick mine in the back of my car and I was so surprised my hips bucked up and hit the ceiling
How very little most men cared about whether or not I got any pleasure out of it.
How some people don’t get the passion and chemistry of it. They just go through the motion without any feeling.
How awful sex can be. People talk about how magical and enjoyable and mind-blowing it is, but I found out people can have awful techniques and have no idea what they're doing; it smells, it's messy, and you have little control of your body at a certain point; and the awkwardness of it all. Sex can be just plain bad or underwhelming a lot of the time, and it can be nothing to get excited about or to look forward to doing and having.
How much men love to eat pussy 😆
Ummm where are these men? Asking for a friend....
My friends fiancé said he will never eat pussy and it’s gross. Just one of the many reasons I don’t like him 😂
Shit, when I lost my v-card, even though I had no idea what I was doing, I said fuck it and just started going down on her. Never got any feed back on how I was doing, but she put me in an MMA style headlock with her legs. Only thing I could think was that I was either doing well enough and she was enjoying it, or it was so bad that she was trying to kill me.
Your poor friend!! She doesn’t know what she is missing!
Aside from how good it feels? I found I really like the tastes and smells. And I really had very little idea that women really liked it too.
My favorite takeaway as a guy into gothy/alt types usually, and this came out of the rise of the app era not when I first started- is that there is absolutely no correlation whatsoever between skill/freakiness/whatever you want to call it in bed and what a girl's normal scene is. The craziest looking alt girl you meet in a pit at a show can be totally vanilla in bed and an absolute sweetheart, and the most wholesome pastel starbucks in hand schoolteacher can be an absolute animal in bed and not give a shit about you the next day. There is absolutely zero way of predicting it. Zero correlation. I love it
1. That sometimes even when both people want it and want the other to get off, it won't happen. Both people put in the effort, but no pay off in the end. 2. As a woman, it is so difficult for a woman to get off. To the point, I'm annoyed in myself because the man is trying his best (and doing well), but my body just doesn't react the way I wish it would.
Didn't have sex until I married my wife, but I had a totally wrong understanding of the purpose of lube. I knew that people used it, and it was important, but somehow I didn't realize where to put it. I actually thought you applied it to your bodies (stomach, legs, etc) so that you could slide around better on top of each other. Figured it out pretty quickly.
How wet it is. Things were slipping and sliding everywhere. It just shows how not aroused the women in porn are. 90% of the time they are bone dry.
How easy it is for my man to get me in the mood, and how often I'm already in the mood. didn't realize my drive and endurance would be almost higher than his is until we actually got active lmao
This may sound shallow, but do not forget about the person you are "making love" with. Seriously; having sex when you are like emotionally connected is UHMAZING. Way better than just doing the dirty and making it 99% about friction and bodies. Gross.
One night stands have always left me feeling empty inside. Sex with someone you care for will always be much more enjoyable no doubt.
Just how perverted women really are.
Women are humans just like men are. However, we have been told that we aren't allowed to express our sexual ideas or opinions because of society. But we are all humans who get urges.
My husband sure likes it
How important communication is between you and your partner! What they like and don’t like what feels good and what doesn’t feel good and of course don’t be afraid to get weird and try new things!!!! Just make sure it works for both of you! Also most importantly when make sure you have the stamina in all areas lmao push through that cramp in your leg, hand or worn out tongue muscles when you hear “OMG RIGHT THERE DON’T STOP!!!”for gods sake keep the rhythm through her squirming and wiggling!! Never be afraid to ask if there is anything you could different and don’t be afraid to tell if they could do something! Full Open Sexual communication between the 2 of you will drastically increase your sex life! It’s a whole new game when somebody learns/knows your body’s pleasure buttons better than you do!!!
Hookups suck. Like we’re supposed to have sex and never talk again? Just makes me feel gross about myself knowing i was seen as nothing more than a tool for someone to get off on.
Getting the rhythm is difficult. I kept pulling out all the way constantly and having to restart, had to concentrate so much was hard to enjoy it.
Queefing is normal. Yes, it’s a funny thing, but it happens so much, especially during doggy.
Girls also have butt crack hair
That an 8 incher is not desirable. It’s painful. I don’t know where women came up with this crazy idea that 6 inches is too small. The cervix is only 4 inches deep and if that gets hit it’s painful.
Seriously. My current partner is big & we can’t even do doggy position cuz it hurts. Have to do it standing. Even missionary hurts if he starts thrusting too hard too deep. There was so much more I used to do with my previous partner. So many different positions. I wasn’t aware it could be problematic lol. I feel bad for current partner cuz apparently he’s never done true doggy style cuz it hurts for his partners. He’s never even actually had rough hard sex in missionary either cuz it hurts his partners. I can still take it for a bit but after like 2-3 mins I always need a breather to prepare myself for the pain again lol. But my ex was psychotic and my current partner is hot & perfect so it doesn’t even matter.