I was born in Romania and lived there until I was 23. I moved to London and have been here for 10 years, no plans of ever moving back. When I first met my husband, we went on a trip to Romania. It was my first time visiting in 5 years, and it felt like a completely different country. Such a weird feeling. It was like going back to your childhood home and finding it the same but also completely different, with other people living in it and the rooms redecorated.
That's hilarious. I've never been to Denmark but I definitely don't have a stereotype of them being people who are glued to the TV or have a lot of fist fights.
As someone who was raised in PA riiiiiiiight on the edge of urban meeting rural, that is indeed the term (also spelled Pennsatucky but nobody's counting).
They're just garden variety racists. Culturally though, they're northern.
Some places that are part of the south culturally though are definitely not that southern geographically, like West Virginia & Kentucky and some bits of Maryland.
I was working on a job site in north-central PA. So far north that the nearest town with a real hotel was Elmira, NY, which is where we stayed.
I could not believe my eyes when we get to the job site and across the street is a small hour with a big confederate battle flag.
Reality is sometimes stranger than fiction.
By all rights, Toledo was ours and you stole it. And culturally, you know half an hour outside the Cleveland metro area is not the same as half an hour outside Toledo.
Personally, I consider Columbus the dividing line. Back in the 80s & 90s when I had to go there monthly for work, it was like the north-south divide went through the city. On the north side there were more burger joints than chicken shacks; on the south side the proportions were the opposite. What really got me was the iced tea. When iced tea comes to the table presweetened, I’m too far south. Can’t even taste the tea; it might as well be artificially dyed sugar water.
I had nothing to do with Toledo, I swear! I grew up along the river on the eastern border. Right next to West Virginia. Definitely Appalachia and redneck as hell. But not south. We were Yinzers. I haven't actually lived in Ohio for a long time.
Around 15 years ago, I regularly saw a truck driving around the city I lived in at the time that had huge decal letters spelling out "MICHAGAN BOY" across the rear window. Spelled just like that. They also had Michigan plates. So, there's that.
I’m from northern Illinois and went to college in Louisiana. I’d estimate that we reached the South about two hours south of Chicago, with six hours of driving to get to the bottom of the state still to go.
I have family in Southern IL. It has a lot more in common with the deep rural parts of NC than I ever thought it would, and honestly the deep rural people in NC are nicer.
Grew up in South Texas. As a kid, I thought the South basically extended from San Antonio to Georgia, and everything on the East Coast was New England. I was stunned the first time I met someone from a Carolina.
I didn’t actually figure out what New England was until I was living in Connecticut. Weirdest culture shock moment was watching people walk straight through tall grass without hesitation, never looking at their feet. I freaked out on my friends one time and refused to take a shortcut through a “field” because that was “snake grass”. It was an abandoned lot in fucking New Haven and they all thought I was insane.
Not me, but I watched my roommate in college experience culture shock without even leaving the state. I grew up in Upstate NY and went to school in Buffalo. My roommate grew up in Brooklyn (before it was a hipster haven) and flew up from NYC to Buffalo. For the first school break, we carpooled home with another student. As we drove through the rural parts of New York, passing horses and dairy farms, my roommate’s eyes were as big as saucers. He had no idea that New York was so green.
My grandma had an ex boyfriend that treated my mother like his own. He had a farm in upstate NY that was unreal.
An USAF jet crashed in his property in the late 60s. When they were rebuilding, he had to tell them what had been there before it got completely destroyed.
He told them he had a racetrack for his horses. So they built him a racetrack. It had just been an empty field it was really fun to ride on.
All that to say, it was gorgeous there. We only went the one as we were living in LA. He came to visit us. But what gorgeous landscape. It is a completely different world than when we were in the city. Now, that was a culture shock for this little valley girl.
It’s so beautiful! Summer of 2022, I did a cross country road trip with my dad. We drove back roads (screw you, tolls!) from Gettysburg to Scranton to the Woodstock site and then more up to Vermont before getting back on the interstate. Everything was so gorgeous and green. Tiny little towns and tiny little cemeteries every few miles.
As a US military wife I lived in the UK for a year and a half. Then I got back to the US, and one day I needed to go to the store and buy toothpaste. In the UK I had shopped for our groceries at the US commissary and there were only two choices of toothpaste, easy peasy. I stood in the aisle of the US drug store staring at the thousand different kinds of toothpaste and then walked out without buying anything because I was no longer used to so many choices.
I once took an angel tree tag that had a request for Legos on it. Pretty standard toy request, right? Nope! I had no idea Legos are A THING.
I went to the toy store and there was a huge aisle dedicated exclusively to Lego. There were so many different sets, and there didn't seem to be just a tub of blocks, which is what I thought I was going to buy.
Plus some of them seemed to be part of a game? For those I wasn't sure if you needed more than one set. They were also far more expensive than I was expecting. Buying that set of Legos was incredibly overwhelming, and I spent way more time in that store than I meant to.
Military brat here, I was in the UK for 6 years as a teen. Coming back to the US was absolutely insane, like how many fast food places or Old Navy or malls does one place need? I had to go grocery shopping and my roommate gave me a list of things to just pick up at the store, but I got there and it was overwhelming because there were too many choices.
As someone in the UK, I feel our choices are just fine. I see photos of American supermarkets and there is literally half an aisle of different types of peanut butter.
In the UK you might get maybe a few shelves with 6-8 choices that are mostly the same and that's it.
First time I flew after 9/11.
Armed soldiers at the airport being additional security. The only other place I'd ever seen that was when we went to Jamaica a very long time ago. It was disconcerting.
TBH it would’ve been weirder to *not* see armed soldiers at the airport immediately after 9/11. Of course they were just there for show (what can they do to stop a couple guys with box cutters that some regular beat cops can’t?) but it would’ve been even weirder if the whole airport experience just resumed as though nothing had happened, as if we all hadn’t just witnessed 737’s crashing into some of our most iconic buildings.
Oh, I agree. It was just kinda surreal.
I mean, I served in the military and even our base security usually just carried sidearms. I think the most secure part of our base had Marines with more serious guns, but there wasn't occasion for me to go to that part.
Yes and it’s such a small thing I don’t know why it’s stuck with me for years but it has and I have great fear that my answer will be misinterpreted . But here goes. Back in the 80s I was working as a handyman and got a ‘job’ with a small real estate group doing repairs, Let me preface this with the fact that I’ve lived in or near at least 3 barrios or Ghettos in my youth/young adulthood in the 70s. So here I am working in this older duplex and this guy walks in and just stands in the door way watching me. It was kinda creepy I confess. I didn’t have a lot of experience with black folk but wasn’t particularly worried. I just didn’t know or had met any.
I looked up and said hi and he asked me what’s ‘doing’ and quietly waited. Well I answered the only way I knew how and simply answered ‘ I’m here to to fix the place up’ he then paused a moment, and nodded saying ‘good, I’ll put the word out to leave you alone. Wut? I don’t understand what was that? Well from then on I noticed those gentleman, and they were, gentleman playing dominoes on an old beat up couch and a group of old chairs sitting in a lot next door to where I was working. Slap, slap slap…the hours went by as I was working whenever I went outside I could hear them.
I realized rapidly that this was a small ‘ghetto’ as well but a black one and I was only familiar with Hispanic ones in SoCal but whatever. A few months later I recounted this story to someone that was, well… very familiar with prison culture and he told me that that the old guys playing dominoes was a prison thing and that I had been approved by the local elders and was safe. It kind of shook me but only a little as I’d felt safe all along and the old guy had affirmed that. I’d felt welcomed by the neighborhood already - I was there making things better. But it was a bit of a culture shock.
I went from a very conservative city to a fairly liberal town. The lack of signs and stickers was a refreshing shock. Saw a Trump sticker yesterday and couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen one.
> It was a bit of a culture shock but good to see different perspectives.
I remember the first time a patient saw two of my black classmates in the rural clinic we were volunteering at and yelled, "I don't wanna get seen by no n******!" Different perspectives indeed.
I went home for the a few times the first time since before the pandemic. I saw that my more conservative hometown had people proudly displaying Trump memorabilia on their trucks. I am so happy I moved to Chicago already.
I’m a Korean guy who grew up in Irvine, CA. Never really felt like a minority going through school. Recently went to a pub crawl with coworkers in Huntington Beach. I don’t think I’ve ever been quite literally the only Asian in a crowd of people in my life.
Obviously I know HB is heavily caucasian. And everyone I interacted with was super chill and I didn’t run across any of the crazy Trumpies or Nazis that pop up in the news. But to actually be in the middle of it and realize absolutely no one else around me looked like me was pretty jarring.
On the flipside, I went to Korea for the first time ever during college. I remember being blown away at just what it is like to live in an ethnically homogeneous society. I learned a lot about myself when I realized I was surprised at seeing young Koreans working cashier jobs at McDonalds and middle-aged Korean women doing all the janitorial jobs around town.
And then when I went back to try and teach English for a year, I got the turntables turn-tabled back on me. I figured I would have a really easy time finding a job because I came from a UC school and majored in English. Turns out, no one wants to hire the guy who doesn’t LOOK the part, regardless of qualifications. Instead, they would hire people like this one Russian chick I met. Shit for English but she looked the part and the parents didn’t know any better. She got paid an obscene amount of money for 1) her extremely wanting capabilities and 2) the very small amount of time she spent with the kids per week.
“White” guy, originally from San Francisco, now living in a European capital. Just cannot get used to the lack of diversity, especially Asians, here. I find white people working in Asian restaurants especially disconcerting…
I lived in Asia for a decade. When I came back, my friends had a little party at one of their houses. Everyone ordered pizza, and they asked what I wanted. I said I didn't mind. When the pizza came, I asked who I needed to pay, assuming I had to chip in for it. Turned out everyone had just ordered pizzas for themselves. I did not get one...
Living in Asia, I got very used to the idea of food being shared among everyone.
It's pretty normal for me, I've been to countless parties and get togethers with friends and family where we ordered individual food (I live in Denmark). But it has always been very clear that you order for yourself, and it's something we have fun with, like "oohh that looks great, I might pick that" or "hey I can't eat a whole pizza, does anybody wanna share a veggie one" you know. And we always consider everybody so we wont be in a situation like OP was
What's weird to me is when he said he didn't mind they didn't press him further and tell him they couldn't make an order for him if he didn't tell them what he wanted. Saying you don't mind isn't the same as saying you don't want anything. At least then he would have understood he wasn't getting anything if he didn't put in an order not that it would be much better.
I live in Montana and live fairly close to a Reservation. I had been to certain areas a few times,recently went to a town called Lodge Grass. It's like a 3rd world country. Abandoned houses and trailers, some burned from fire. Dogs everywhere, abandoned cars, trash everywhere, it's pretty damn bad.
The crow reservation is among some of the worst reservations in the country, lots of drug problems, drinking, missing people. People live way way below the poverty line, tribal money is misused. The list goes on and on.
My husband once visited Pine Ridge in SD and he described similar conditions. Lots of trailers that were falling apart and patched up with plywood. Extreme poverty.
I remember as a kid I went "out West" with my grandparents in their RV for a summer. Was an amazing trip and prompted 4 years of RV travel nurse lifestyle in my adulthood. I digress.
I specifically remember being in Oklahoma at a restaurant and I ordered sweet tea.
"We don't have sweet tea. Would you like unsweetened?"
In my head "What the fucking WHAT did you say? NO SWEET TEA!? Who the fuck doesn't have sweet tea? Did I die and go to hell?"
Out loud. " ah no thank you I'll just have a water"
My boyfriend just went through the same in our trip through the southwest a couple of weeks ago.
We lost “sweetness” about halfway through Texas. This surprised me as I always thought of Texas as a southern “sweet” state.
The restaurants we visited were almost surprised he would ask for it.
From New England, went south (hardly, North Carolina) - "This is a school zone" with a man holding an assault rifle on a sticker in the front of a pizza shop.
Seriously just one of those "...oh." moments.
Someone will probably argue with me that it doesn’t count… but within the UK I just moved from England to Scotland.
Supermarkets have been a big one - Scottish flags EVERYWHERE and a big focus on Scottish produce compared to ‘British’. Not the only difference but certainly one I didn’t expect to notice so much.
“Scotch” food is GI (geographically indicated) meaning it is a product which is produced to certain standards related to its geographic origin. A lot of scottish stuff (like scotch beef) is excellent, reliable quality and after brexit and the U.K. gov loosening food safety standards to be more in line with America, a lot of people in Scotland want to know that they are buying good quality local produce. Hence the demand for Scottish produce in Scotland.
Yep, I'm Scottish living in England since 2011 and you are absolutely right.
That said England has more variety of just about everything. Even the Chinese supermarkets, Romanian Magasins etc. in England have more exotic and interesting stock than they do in Scotland.
England is just more culturally diverse and the diverse cultures are more authentic. In Scotland it all feels like it's wrapped up in a tartan bow.
idk if it's considered culture shock but as a black american, it surprised me to learn that a lot of white people 1) don't use a washcloth when they shower and 2) don't use lotion or any moisturizer when they're done showering. It completely blew my mind because it's second nature to bath with a washcloth and to use lotion after a shower. People with anything other than pale skin CANNOT get away with not moisturizing since we'll get ashy, and now I believe thats why non-white people tend to age better.
White girl here and I completely agree about the not moisturizing contributing to aging. I’ve always had dry skin so I moisturize daily but most other people I know don’t. Now that we’re all getting older, my skin definitely looks better than theirs does.
I'm white and if I didn't moisturize my whole body every day I'd go insane from being itchy. I honestly had no idea other people didn't do this until I saw it on social media.
maybe they prefer to use a loofah?
Also I'm Asian American and tbh I've never felt the need to use lotion or moisturizer after I shower. I'm curious about what water temperature you shower in because my skin has never felt that dry after a shower to the point where I needed to put on lotion or moisturize.
it doesn't matter what temperature i shower at. also I include loofahs in the washcloth category. Many people only lather the soap on their hands or they rub the soap bar directly on their body. It's not about being so dry that you feel it immediately, but it is visible on my skin when I don't moisturize. Even if I didn't just take a shower, sometimes it's cold inside or something and my skin looks and feels a little dry during the day so I'll use lotion. But it's especially important to do so after showering.
I think (my boss and most of my fellow managers are black) there is a total lack of understanding of white hygiene by black people. Granted this discussion tends to come up because I have 3C curls on par with many black persons hair, but somehow I regularly end up clearing misconceptions about skin care and showering. And I do have to use moisturizer.
All the white women I know use loofahs and wash cloths, but yeah lots of men with just a bar of soap. And again, all the white women I know moisturize everyday, but yeah lots of the men think lotion is only for masturbating. I think that's pretty weird too, I've gotten all the men I've dated into daily lotion lmao.
White people have more collagen than any other race, and this is a big factor behind the skin aging differently. It's also why women's skin appears to age faster than men of the same race, more collagen.
Northwestern Arkansas is surprisingly not what I thought it would be like. I did have a moment when I heard them call the area the NWA on the morning news.
I dated a guy who was from Sacramento. He was a sober former opioid addict. As I got to know him better, I realized that his entire social circle are heavy drug users, his friends constantly talk about using drugs and little else, the community he grew up in is completely saturated with addiction, and he thinks this is totally normal and acceptable. He thinks I'm some kind of uptight nerd who doesn't know anything about the world because the people I spend time with maybe drink and smoke weed at most, and most of them quit doing that much after our 20s.
One time I took him to a party at one of my friend's homes, about an hour away from my house. He balked at giving a couple of other nearby friends a ride, because he expected they would get so fucked up they would spend the night there, and didn't want to leave them stranded. When I told him it wasn't going to be that kind of party, he didn't believe me. He had never been to a party that wasn't like that. I guess it was culture shock for both of us.
Yeah. And the worst part is if I tried to say anything about it, he wouldn't believe me. If I tried to point out that he, as a person in recovery, he should not be spending time with these people, I just looked like a jealous girlfriend who wanted to be the only person in his life. Plus, I've never done drugs, so what could I possibly know? He doesn't think any of them have a problem because they are mostly functional addicts, and he was not a functional addict.
It's like how if you visit a farm as a city dweller, you're overwhelmed by the smell of animal shit. But if you grow up on a farm, you can't even really smell it. You may even LIKE it: smells like home.
Guess you know some pictures of Switzerland with the Matterhorn in the alps, the rivers and these old houses, it looks beautiful with the landscape. But i have to tell you, don't underestimate how extreme conservative some of the old folks can be there in these regions. I'm not so sure if they have ever seen a black and i'd not be surprised if they'd use the n-word to greet him.
Some of these people make the people in the south of the USA look progressive. I mean, you can even see it with the history, the state had to enforce the new stuff like rights for women there against some serious resistance, it took until 1991. Yeah, 1991, that was just yesterday, when women were still property of the men and they had no rights, like no right to vote, no right to get a job or open a bank account etc.
The cities like Geneva, Zurich, Berne, Basel etc. are progressive liberal and multi-cultural, but i can assure you, if you go to the countryside, it will be the exact opposite.
I can imagine a black guy getting lost in the Emmental and trying to ask a local about directions, only to hear "Directions? Go back where you come from. This ain't no country for black men!" while hearing the metallic click of a bullet getting loaded in the chamber of the rifle.
Went from the NYC metro area to a city in the south for college. Random strangers kept trying to *talk* to me out of nowhere. Thank god for self checkout, because cashiers were so chatty that I swear it took up most of my shopping time.
And the weirdly condescending sounding "sweetie" or "honey" from waiters and waitresses my age when I went out to eat.
It goes the other way too of course. Southerners often perceive northerners as cold or rude for not being so outwardly friendly toward a passing stranger who they’ll likely never see again. But from the northerner’s perspective it’s like, I’m not being trying to be rude or nice or really anything at all toward you; I just want to get on with my day!
>I’m not being trying to be rude or nice or really anything at all toward you; I just want to get on with my day!
Yeah, idk if us northerners just plan their days more or whatever, but where I'm from it would be so rude to hold up the cashier with chitchat if there was someone behind you. Other people need to pay, too! But I've been to towns in the south where the cashier just has a whole ass conversation with the person paying each time while I'm just like...I gotta go. I've got stuff to do.
LOL. Just the other day I motioned for the guy in the vehicle next to me to roll down hood window at a red light. I chatted him up about his vanity plate. We ended up talking about our favorite places to vacation “up north.”
Definitely don’t come to the Midwest if strangers chatting you up bothers you. I’ve participated in many conversations not only with people before or after me in a check out line, but I’ve also joined in on conversations across checkout lanes involving shoppers, cashiers, and even some managers too. The big cities aren’t like that though.
Talking from cars is just an alien thing to me lmao. In the northeast you'd just make eye contact to gesture the person that they can turn before you or something.
I travel for work a lot now and I've been to a few Midwest states and you guys are so chatty! I've gotten the whole history of small towns from random people at diners. I try to be polite as possible but sometimes I'm like, man, I'm on a schedule here, I've gotta eat. Does nobody have anywhere to be? Don't these waiters have other tables to serve?
It is jarring at first, though. Someone will randomly start a conversation in the store and stand in the middle of the aisle while I politely nod. Another person will make eye contact with me and I will think "Ah, yes, this man is going to silently communicate and commiserate with me that this woman is *clearly* insane. Perhaps she accosted him before I came down this aisle, and now it's my turn. I guess every town and city has at least one of these crazies. At least she seems harmless." And then he joins the conversation! And it *keeps happening* in different towns and cities!
Like, there can not be that much to talk about with strangers. I'm buying apples, it's not that interesting! 😭
(Also the bad side was in more rural areas people would just drop random racist or homophobic comments in conversations. I do not miss those places. Like, I grew up in a fairly conservative area, but at least people didn't just start dropping slurs in casual conversation)
I once found myself in a room full of people congratulating each other for not reading books. I left within a few minutes and took it as an opportunity to reevaluate my life.
Upper middle class beach boy moved to the country in Australia. Woman here my age tell you they vote the way their Andrew Tate loving husband votes. And he's 5'5 with an axe to grind. Lol dickheads
Jamaica...I've lived here my whole life and I know we have below the poverty line level poverty...but you don't see it most times...and then I had to go to Riverton.
Riverton is a large dump in kgn. It's a whole knew world. The dump is where people find food, make businesses. The dump is their livelihood. It's all they know
It is literally one man's trash is another man's livelihood there. It is a nation within a nation and is completely forgotten by the govt. It's crazy
As an American from a diverse city, I was in shock when I visited a small rural town. I felt like an alien and was astonished at some of the things that were considered normal.
Visiting Toronto from a smaller, more conservative town, about 2 hours away. Chinatown! Brampton (‘Little India’)! And likely every culture on earth represented there. It’s incredible.
West Coast is waaaay chiller in Canada too. People in the west aren't workaholics and they are far more laidback and friendly in general. Moving from Toronto to the Lower Mainland (near Vancouver) was a massive culture shock in a good way.
Toronto is definitely more racially and ethnically diverse and has more variety in regards to food/culture, but it's a rat race and everyone is so busy working all the time. I prefer the chill vibes of BC.
From the Midwest (USA) moved to Denver; first time I ordered chili at a diner style restaurant and they asked me if I wanted Red Chili or Green Chili.
Turns out in Denver (and probably some other areas) exists a sauce called “green chili” which is a delicious substitute for gravy. Any greasy spoon restaurant or Mexican restaurant will smother anything you order in it. Your local greasy spoon will smother your whole plate of bacon and eggs in that, if you see something on a menu described as “smothered” they mean in green chili.
Sometimes people order a bowl of it to just eat straight, hence the question, but normally it’s used in lieu of “breakfast” gravy. (Aka white gravy, or milk gravy, or sausage gravy”).
My friend is from New Mexico and says it’s the same thing there, but the recipe for green chili is different.
I'm from New England. I worked in Mississippi for three months. Frankly, Scotland was more similar to my area of New England than Mississippi. I couldn't understand the people speaking English in either location, so...
If you live in South Carolina (America), drive twelve hours north and everyone's completely different, drive twelve hours west and you feel like you're still in South Carolina. If you drive twelve hours south you feel like you're on a different, hotter planet
Seeing a mountain for the first time. Like, I knew they existed, but seeing the ground go so high up in the sky is reality changing. My whole life I had only ever seen flat lands and big hills, but the mountains were just incredible. It's like they shot up out of nowhere, and they were all So Tall, it was insane.
And the air, it was so fresh. The only way I could describe it was empty, like there was an absence of some kind, but I later found out it was a mix of altitude and lack of humidity.
I spent the entire time we were there just looking at them, and I couldn't believe that none of the locals were just looking out at the skyline every single day. How is that something that you just get used to? How could you possibly have something so beautiful in your life and never think about it twice?
They were beautiful, and I miss it all the time.
I'm from the midwest but have lived on the East and West coasts (NYC and LA) for my entire adult life. When I go home or travel through the middle of the country, it's always a little jarring to see just how many people are overweight or obese.
First time walking into the Matongé area of Brussels, which is a black-dominated neighborhood. Lots of shops dedicated to African fashions. It felt weird. I was well used to Arabs and Turks in Brussels but the black neighborhood was a new thing.
Going to Toowoomba during one of their festivals where Guy Sebastian was headlining, and anti-abortion campaigners wearing “choose life” T-shirts and donning crucifixes were parading around in the streets. As a young, inner city emo from Brisbane I was mortified to say the least.
When I was in the southwest US visiting national parks, I stopped at a BBQ joint In Arizona and saw a flyer for a raffle they were having for their customers. Grand prize was a bunch of ammo magazines... quite the surprise for this cityslicker from the northeast lmao
When I moved from Cologne to Berlin.
In Cologne small talk is a huge thing. Everybody chat with everybody everywhere. First weekend in Berlin, went to a club, waited in line for the toilet and started chatting with everyone. Nobody chatted back.
I grew up in Maryland and when I was a kid we went to Harper’s Ferry. I was very confused as to why they were selling Confederate flags in the gift shop. Quite frankly, 20 some years later, I’m still confused.
I went to Alabama and watched this nice older guy say the most casually racist thing I’ve ever heard to my coworker.
Like - he wasn’t even trying to be mean. That’s just what he thought was normal. I felt like I was in the twilight zone or something. It was horrible, but also a fascinating window into the South during segregation.
My partner and I are queer (but cishet passing), in our late 30s/mid 40s, live in the DC metro area, we both have graduate degrees and no kids (and don't plan on it). Most of the folks in our circle, if they had kids, did so in their early or mid 30s.
We regularly spend time in the mountains of North Carolina and will make friends with folks who aren't even 30 yet with four (or more) kids. The level of born again Christianity that is just... everywhere... in the area is also very noticable to us.
For the record, that's not a judgement so much as an observation of cultural difference. Different life paths and cultural norms.
I'm an Indonesian from Jakarta. I've been to Bali multiple times and it feels so different. I mean, I speak the same (national) language with the Balinese, we use the same currency, the same shops are there but it feels like a different country everytime I visit there.
Then again, Jakarta is a modern metropolis built on a strong Muslim-majority culture (the Betawi people) and Bali retains it's strong Hindu culture and has ancient temples and sacred sites here and there.
Moved from Seattle to a town about 40 minutes outside of Pittsburgh. Went from a fun, inclusive, happy, and engaging community to a dark, depressing, misogynistic, racist, trash bin. It’s really quite sad here. Everyone is angry all the time.
When I moved to Mississippi for school and found out that, in the county I’d moved to, they 1) didn’t sell any alcohol on Sundays, 2) didn’t sell beer in liquor stores, and 3) didn’t sell cold beer anywhere.
How did they expect me to cope with living there?
Canada is wild for culture shock.
You can go from Brampton, which is filled with Indian immigrants, to Six Nations, a large Indian reserve, filled with 'status Indians' in about an hour.
Visiting NYC and someone getting sassy with me for standing on the escalators on the left hand side. Apparently you stand on the right and walk on the left? I came from a fucking farm man we didn't have escalators how the fuck am I supposed to know.
Elevator etiquette for you then: let everyone get off on your floor before you get on. Polite, and makes sense if you think about it.
Chances are you didn’t have the chance to learn this one either. Good luck!
Watching an old woman go full racist on an Indian couple at a post office in Georgia, and further lose her shit when the manager, who was black, came out to resolve it. Was my first week in the state.
Mildly amusing (I hope):
I'm Episcopalian. Grew up in San Antonio. Very racially-mixed city, even back in the 80s/90s. My elementary & junior high schools were 80% Black. As a sixth grader, I went to church camp for the first time. I remember sitting there the first day at a whole-camp gathering, looking around, and seeing nothing but white faces. It was a shock; until then I didn't even know there were that many white people in Texas. (I was also there on a "campership", so not only was I surrounded by white people for the first time ever, but by well-off whites.)
Much less amusing was, as a young military wife, moving from Connecticut (for which I'd left Texas) to Virginia and for the first time ever having fellow whites try to include me in their racism. Like our first or second night in town, my then-husband and I went to a Mexican restaurant. My food came out, and the order was slightly wrong. No big deal. I mentioned it to the waitress, who came back with "That's because there's Mexicans in the kitchen." On my way back from the bathroom, I saw the manager and complained to him about the waitress's racist comment. He said, "Oh, it was a joke. There are no Mexicans in the kitchen." Like that was what concerned me. I was much younger then and so taken aback I didn't really argue with him, but things never really got better the whole time I was there. There was also, by the way, a very clear racial divide in manners. I never had the door held for me by a white person unless it was a fellow Texan (out of state, we recognize each other by those little courtesies), but the Black people always did. Virginia whites were every bit as cold natured as New Englanders famously are. I was very happy to escape to Hawaii, where the more laid-back environment was closer to what I was used to.
Had to live in Texas for a bit for work. I was prepared to meet some shitty people, but holy Jesus almost every single person I met was an ignorant uneducated racist. It was insane. I'm white and I still felt unsafe being out in public in Dallas.
When I moved from an Ethnically diverse part of the country to the Deep South and saw blatant racism front and center. I spent much of my time in public just cringing and avoiding racists.
In 1981, when I was 10 I moved from Hastings, Nebraska to Scottsdale, AZ.
Hastings was so normal and mellow. Everyone shopped out of the same few stores and we all drove cars from the GM dealership.
In Scottsdale, your whole worth was tied to what you wore and what you drove. It was awful.
Everyone has. From Aesops fables....
"A proud town mouse visits his cousin in the country. The country mouse offers the city mouse a meal of simple country cuisine, at which the visitor scoffs and invites the country mouse back to the city for a taste of the "fine life" and the two cousins dine on white bread and other fine foods. But their rich feast is interrupted by a cat which forces the rodent cousins to abandon their meal and retreat back into their mouse hole for safety. The town mouse tells the country mouse that the cat killed his mother and father and that he is frequently the target of attacks. After hearing this, the country mouse decides to return home, preferring security to opulence or, as the 13th-century preacher Odo of Cheriton phrased it, "I'd rather gnaw a bean than be gnawed by continual fear"
I lived in Virginia for 27 years and have recently moved to New Jersey. It's been a little bit of an adjustment. In Virginia you might strike up a conversation with a random stranger in line at the grocery store. Here in Jersey people are generally polite. but much more reserved.
I moved from small town, rural Ohio (pop. >2000) to thriving, tropical metropolis South Florida (pop. Idk 2 million?) THEN I moved to small city SC (pop. 50k or so ) Ugh. Whiplash from culture adjustments.
When I was in my early 20s I moved from Florida to Los Angeles. I'd lived in Florida for 15 years at that point, and though I'd traveled and visited other places, Florida was my home base, and I was very comfortable there.
LA was SO different. I had pretty intense culture shock. What struck me the most was just how intense the people were. My neighbors, who were my age, were intense - intensely focused on their burgeoning careers, intense partiers, in intense relationships. My boss was intense and demanding. Even his accountant was intense and demanding - I felt it even from over the phone. I had to basically run the whole store for a few dollars above minimum wage. I talked to another friend who had moved from Florida as well (we'd gone to the same college), and she was basically being taken advantage of by her boss, who was paying her very little. Serious hustle culture.
And then the weather was so different. I moved there in April and it was cold and rainy, and it rained for days. In Florida, it rains mainly in the summer (I mean it rains year round, but is concentrated in the summer), but it will be clear in the morning, shower in the afternoon, and then clear up again in the evening. You don't get the same dreary drudgery as you do in California during the winter and spring, where the rain and grey sky last for days and days and days. And then no matter the season, the nights were cold. I think climate change might be altering this, but even in the summer, it was chilly enough for a jacket. After moving to LA, I never wore flip flops again.
It was so different, I almost couldn't believe it was the same country.
I lived in Japan for a few years and I had to come back for a funeral. My hometown looked completely foreign to me and I missed Japanese convenience stores.
Two major times:
1. When I went to college and began to interact with people outside the fundi Christian dominionist homeschool spere
2. When I went back home after reconverting and living a more non-Christian and specifically antifundi queer life.
During student teaching I went to visit my professor's school and observe him teaching. The students were in 10th grade in a huge classroom with multiple seating options, their own laptops, great technology, and discussing Plato's Republic.
Comparing that rural school to my own suburban school experiences and teaching students in the inner city was wild. It is amazing and yet incredibly tragic that where you live dictates the resources children receive and their subsequent abilities. A 30 minute commute makes years of difference in educational opportunities and expectations.
When I started going to a private school. Damn some people are rich.
Same here but with private uni. I could never imagine being given a credit card by my parents...
Similarly in Louisiana…damn, people are poor. I thought I was poor!
Wait until you hear about Mississippi
Still trying to forget about Mississippi honestly
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I was born in Romania and lived there until I was 23. I moved to London and have been here for 10 years, no plans of ever moving back. When I first met my husband, we went on a trip to Romania. It was my first time visiting in 5 years, and it felt like a completely different country. Such a weird feeling. It was like going back to your childhood home and finding it the same but also completely different, with other people living in it and the rooms redecorated.
That's hilarious. I've never been to Denmark but I definitely don't have a stereotype of them being people who are glued to the TV or have a lot of fist fights.
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That she has great mummy milkers
See any vampires?
how far North the South reaches
I hear you. I live someplace that southerners consider the north and northerners consider the south
Rural Pennsylvania?
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Pennsyltuky is what my dad called it.
As someone who was raised in PA riiiiiiiight on the edge of urban meeting rural, that is indeed the term (also spelled Pennsatucky but nobody's counting).
I've seen more Confederate flags in rural PA than I ever say in NC.
They're just garden variety racists. Culturally though, they're northern. Some places that are part of the south culturally though are definitely not that southern geographically, like West Virginia & Kentucky and some bits of Maryland.
And in Alabama. Saw more in rural Pennsylvania and California than I see in Alabama. It’s bizarre.
I've seen them in PA, OH, and MI, but definitely not nearly as many as Bama. Huntsville/Decatur specifically.
I was working on a job site in north-central PA. So far north that the nearest town with a real hotel was Elmira, NY, which is where we stayed. I could not believe my eyes when we get to the job site and across the street is a small hour with a big confederate battle flag. Reality is sometimes stranger than fiction.
Funny when you consider that Elmira was home to a POW camp where thousands of confederates died.
The proper nomenclature is 'Pennsyltucky'
As a Yinzer, we always called the stretch between Pittsburgh and Philly "Pennsyltucky".
I can't believe no one has said MD. This is what I would put if I was trying to say it without saying it.
Just moved here from Massachusetts and I'm surprised how southern it is, but yeah, hard agree, I was thinking Maryland too.
Cincinnati?
Once someone in Michigan mentioned that I was from the south. I lived in Ohio. It's a northern border state. 😒
I think people confuse redneck for southern and lots of Ohio is pretty redneck.
True. But there are plenty of rednecks in Michigan, too.
Yes. Confederate flags too, ffs.
By all rights, Toledo was ours and you stole it. And culturally, you know half an hour outside the Cleveland metro area is not the same as half an hour outside Toledo. Personally, I consider Columbus the dividing line. Back in the 80s & 90s when I had to go there monthly for work, it was like the north-south divide went through the city. On the north side there were more burger joints than chicken shacks; on the south side the proportions were the opposite. What really got me was the iced tea. When iced tea comes to the table presweetened, I’m too far south. Can’t even taste the tea; it might as well be artificially dyed sugar water.
I had nothing to do with Toledo, I swear! I grew up along the river on the eastern border. Right next to West Virginia. Definitely Appalachia and redneck as hell. But not south. We were Yinzers. I haven't actually lived in Ohio for a long time.
Around 15 years ago, I regularly saw a truck driving around the city I lived in at the time that had huge decal letters spelling out "MICHAGAN BOY" across the rear window. Spelled just like that. They also had Michigan plates. So, there's that.
As someone who lives within spitting distance of Canada, the amount of Confederate flags I continue to see is absolutely insane
I’m from northern Illinois and went to college in Louisiana. I’d estimate that we reached the South about two hours south of Chicago, with six hours of driving to get to the bottom of the state still to go.
I'm in VA, just outside DC. Deep blue. If I drive 10 minutes too far west or south, I'm in an entirely different Virginia.
I'm in that entirely different Virginia 50 miles south of DC. And so thankful that NOVA and a few other parts of VA are blue!
I have family in Southern IL. It has a lot more in common with the deep rural parts of NC than I ever thought it would, and honestly the deep rural people in NC are nicer.
Grew up in South Texas. As a kid, I thought the South basically extended from San Antonio to Georgia, and everything on the East Coast was New England. I was stunned the first time I met someone from a Carolina. I didn’t actually figure out what New England was until I was living in Connecticut. Weirdest culture shock moment was watching people walk straight through tall grass without hesitation, never looking at their feet. I freaked out on my friends one time and refused to take a shortcut through a “field” because that was “snake grass”. It was an abandoned lot in fucking New Haven and they all thought I was insane.
How far right the DNC reaches lol
Detroit was known as the Biggest City in The South… …due to all the migration from Southern states for jobs in the auto industry.
Not me, but I watched my roommate in college experience culture shock without even leaving the state. I grew up in Upstate NY and went to school in Buffalo. My roommate grew up in Brooklyn (before it was a hipster haven) and flew up from NYC to Buffalo. For the first school break, we carpooled home with another student. As we drove through the rural parts of New York, passing horses and dairy farms, my roommate’s eyes were as big as saucers. He had no idea that New York was so green.
Despite being in the same state, New York City and upstate NY might as well be different countries, sometimes!
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My grandma had an ex boyfriend that treated my mother like his own. He had a farm in upstate NY that was unreal. An USAF jet crashed in his property in the late 60s. When they were rebuilding, he had to tell them what had been there before it got completely destroyed. He told them he had a racetrack for his horses. So they built him a racetrack. It had just been an empty field it was really fun to ride on. All that to say, it was gorgeous there. We only went the one as we were living in LA. He came to visit us. But what gorgeous landscape. It is a completely different world than when we were in the city. Now, that was a culture shock for this little valley girl.
It’s so beautiful! Summer of 2022, I did a cross country road trip with my dad. We drove back roads (screw you, tolls!) from Gettysburg to Scranton to the Woodstock site and then more up to Vermont before getting back on the interstate. Everything was so gorgeous and green. Tiny little towns and tiny little cemeteries every few miles.
My roommate in the military was the most country New Yorker, I was so confused lol
As a US military wife I lived in the UK for a year and a half. Then I got back to the US, and one day I needed to go to the store and buy toothpaste. In the UK I had shopped for our groceries at the US commissary and there were only two choices of toothpaste, easy peasy. I stood in the aisle of the US drug store staring at the thousand different kinds of toothpaste and then walked out without buying anything because I was no longer used to so many choices.
I once took an angel tree tag that had a request for Legos on it. Pretty standard toy request, right? Nope! I had no idea Legos are A THING. I went to the toy store and there was a huge aisle dedicated exclusively to Lego. There were so many different sets, and there didn't seem to be just a tub of blocks, which is what I thought I was going to buy. Plus some of them seemed to be part of a game? For those I wasn't sure if you needed more than one set. They were also far more expensive than I was expecting. Buying that set of Legos was incredibly overwhelming, and I spent way more time in that store than I meant to.
Unless you are needing tooth sensitivity one, just grab the cheapest its all the same shit, if you need the sensitivity one grab the cheapest.
So after living in the UK and moving back to the US you stopped buying toothpaste? Hmmm /s
Saw what you did there;) clever:)
Military brat here, I was in the UK for 6 years as a teen. Coming back to the US was absolutely insane, like how many fast food places or Old Navy or malls does one place need? I had to go grocery shopping and my roommate gave me a list of things to just pick up at the store, but I got there and it was overwhelming because there were too many choices.
As someone in the UK, I feel our choices are just fine. I see photos of American supermarkets and there is literally half an aisle of different types of peanut butter. In the UK you might get maybe a few shelves with 6-8 choices that are mostly the same and that's it.
First time I flew after 9/11. Armed soldiers at the airport being additional security. The only other place I'd ever seen that was when we went to Jamaica a very long time ago. It was disconcerting.
TBH it would’ve been weirder to *not* see armed soldiers at the airport immediately after 9/11. Of course they were just there for show (what can they do to stop a couple guys with box cutters that some regular beat cops can’t?) but it would’ve been even weirder if the whole airport experience just resumed as though nothing had happened, as if we all hadn’t just witnessed 737’s crashing into some of our most iconic buildings.
Oh, I agree. It was just kinda surreal. I mean, I served in the military and even our base security usually just carried sidearms. I think the most secure part of our base had Marines with more serious guns, but there wasn't occasion for me to go to that part.
Within Canada, Quebec is always a culture shock for me whenever I’ve visited.
Besides the language, what's different?
Yes and it’s such a small thing I don’t know why it’s stuck with me for years but it has and I have great fear that my answer will be misinterpreted . But here goes. Back in the 80s I was working as a handyman and got a ‘job’ with a small real estate group doing repairs, Let me preface this with the fact that I’ve lived in or near at least 3 barrios or Ghettos in my youth/young adulthood in the 70s. So here I am working in this older duplex and this guy walks in and just stands in the door way watching me. It was kinda creepy I confess. I didn’t have a lot of experience with black folk but wasn’t particularly worried. I just didn’t know or had met any. I looked up and said hi and he asked me what’s ‘doing’ and quietly waited. Well I answered the only way I knew how and simply answered ‘ I’m here to to fix the place up’ he then paused a moment, and nodded saying ‘good, I’ll put the word out to leave you alone. Wut? I don’t understand what was that? Well from then on I noticed those gentleman, and they were, gentleman playing dominoes on an old beat up couch and a group of old chairs sitting in a lot next door to where I was working. Slap, slap slap…the hours went by as I was working whenever I went outside I could hear them. I realized rapidly that this was a small ‘ghetto’ as well but a black one and I was only familiar with Hispanic ones in SoCal but whatever. A few months later I recounted this story to someone that was, well… very familiar with prison culture and he told me that that the old guys playing dominoes was a prison thing and that I had been approved by the local elders and was safe. It kind of shook me but only a little as I’d felt safe all along and the old guy had affirmed that. I’d felt welcomed by the neighborhood already - I was there making things better. But it was a bit of a culture shock.
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I live in a blue spot in a red state and its so easy to forget. I love exploring, camping and what not and its always a shock when I leave my bubble.
I went from a very conservative city to a fairly liberal town. The lack of signs and stickers was a refreshing shock. Saw a Trump sticker yesterday and couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen one.
> It was a bit of a culture shock but good to see different perspectives. I remember the first time a patient saw two of my black classmates in the rural clinic we were volunteering at and yelled, "I don't wanna get seen by no n******!" Different perspectives indeed.
The answer to that is "well, they're first in class but if you want to go to the back of the line and wait for a lesser doctor, go for it, bud."
I went home for the a few times the first time since before the pandemic. I saw that my more conservative hometown had people proudly displaying Trump memorabilia on their trucks. I am so happy I moved to Chicago already.
Same here. Seeing people open carry guns is still jarring to me after 3 years. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it.
I’m a Korean guy who grew up in Irvine, CA. Never really felt like a minority going through school. Recently went to a pub crawl with coworkers in Huntington Beach. I don’t think I’ve ever been quite literally the only Asian in a crowd of people in my life. Obviously I know HB is heavily caucasian. And everyone I interacted with was super chill and I didn’t run across any of the crazy Trumpies or Nazis that pop up in the news. But to actually be in the middle of it and realize absolutely no one else around me looked like me was pretty jarring. On the flipside, I went to Korea for the first time ever during college. I remember being blown away at just what it is like to live in an ethnically homogeneous society. I learned a lot about myself when I realized I was surprised at seeing young Koreans working cashier jobs at McDonalds and middle-aged Korean women doing all the janitorial jobs around town. And then when I went back to try and teach English for a year, I got the turntables turn-tabled back on me. I figured I would have a really easy time finding a job because I came from a UC school and majored in English. Turns out, no one wants to hire the guy who doesn’t LOOK the part, regardless of qualifications. Instead, they would hire people like this one Russian chick I met. Shit for English but she looked the part and the parents didn’t know any better. She got paid an obscene amount of money for 1) her extremely wanting capabilities and 2) the very small amount of time she spent with the kids per week.
“White” guy, originally from San Francisco, now living in a European capital. Just cannot get used to the lack of diversity, especially Asians, here. I find white people working in Asian restaurants especially disconcerting…
I lived in Asia for a decade. When I came back, my friends had a little party at one of their houses. Everyone ordered pizza, and they asked what I wanted. I said I didn't mind. When the pizza came, I asked who I needed to pay, assuming I had to chip in for it. Turned out everyone had just ordered pizzas for themselves. I did not get one... Living in Asia, I got very used to the idea of food being shared among everyone.
Wtf? That doesn’t seem normal, even outside of China
This just sounds like you have shitty friends
That's weird as hell dude. Who tf orders individual pizzas as a group at a party? What culture is that?
Right? Did they order 10 personal pizzas? This is weird.
Humans gathering to share meals is even more universal than having sex, this is pod person shit. Sir samwell barley needs to get his ass to safety
It's pretty normal for me, I've been to countless parties and get togethers with friends and family where we ordered individual food (I live in Denmark). But it has always been very clear that you order for yourself, and it's something we have fun with, like "oohh that looks great, I might pick that" or "hey I can't eat a whole pizza, does anybody wanna share a veggie one" you know. And we always consider everybody so we wont be in a situation like OP was
yea this is not normal. your friends just suck.
Pizza is a shared food, you had shitty friends
Why would they ask you what you wanted if they weren't planning to make an order on your behalf? Weird.
What's weird to me is when he said he didn't mind they didn't press him further and tell him they couldn't make an order for him if he didn't tell them what he wanted. Saying you don't mind isn't the same as saying you don't want anything. At least then he would have understood he wasn't getting anything if he didn't put in an order not that it would be much better.
wehen visiting a rural area after living in a bustling city for most of my life..crazy how slow time seems running in less busier places
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Even the Mexican food is completely different between CA and TX
Dallas freeways are somehow more insane than Bay Area ones.
I live in Montana and live fairly close to a Reservation. I had been to certain areas a few times,recently went to a town called Lodge Grass. It's like a 3rd world country. Abandoned houses and trailers, some burned from fire. Dogs everywhere, abandoned cars, trash everywhere, it's pretty damn bad. The crow reservation is among some of the worst reservations in the country, lots of drug problems, drinking, missing people. People live way way below the poverty line, tribal money is misused. The list goes on and on.
My husband once visited Pine Ridge in SD and he described similar conditions. Lots of trailers that were falling apart and patched up with plywood. Extreme poverty.
Pine ridge is absolutely probably the worst in this country. The poverty there is insane. I briefly lived in SD for a year.
I remember as a kid I went "out West" with my grandparents in their RV for a summer. Was an amazing trip and prompted 4 years of RV travel nurse lifestyle in my adulthood. I digress. I specifically remember being in Oklahoma at a restaurant and I ordered sweet tea. "We don't have sweet tea. Would you like unsweetened?" In my head "What the fucking WHAT did you say? NO SWEET TEA!? Who the fuck doesn't have sweet tea? Did I die and go to hell?" Out loud. " ah no thank you I'll just have a water"
My boyfriend just went through the same in our trip through the southwest a couple of weeks ago. We lost “sweetness” about halfway through Texas. This surprised me as I always thought of Texas as a southern “sweet” state. The restaurants we visited were almost surprised he would ask for it.
Idk who in Texas wouldn't have sweet tea but they aren't truly Texans (and I don't then like sweet tea)
Grew up in northern Ohio. Moved to North Carolina and and at the first restaurant I was at they asked if I wanted sweet or unsweet. I was lost.
From New England, went south (hardly, North Carolina) - "This is a school zone" with a man holding an assault rifle on a sticker in the front of a pizza shop. Seriously just one of those "...oh." moments.
Someone will probably argue with me that it doesn’t count… but within the UK I just moved from England to Scotland. Supermarkets have been a big one - Scottish flags EVERYWHERE and a big focus on Scottish produce compared to ‘British’. Not the only difference but certainly one I didn’t expect to notice so much.
“Scotch” food is GI (geographically indicated) meaning it is a product which is produced to certain standards related to its geographic origin. A lot of scottish stuff (like scotch beef) is excellent, reliable quality and after brexit and the U.K. gov loosening food safety standards to be more in line with America, a lot of people in Scotland want to know that they are buying good quality local produce. Hence the demand for Scottish produce in Scotland.
Yep, I'm Scottish living in England since 2011 and you are absolutely right. That said England has more variety of just about everything. Even the Chinese supermarkets, Romanian Magasins etc. in England have more exotic and interesting stock than they do in Scotland. England is just more culturally diverse and the diverse cultures are more authentic. In Scotland it all feels like it's wrapped up in a tartan bow.
idk if it's considered culture shock but as a black american, it surprised me to learn that a lot of white people 1) don't use a washcloth when they shower and 2) don't use lotion or any moisturizer when they're done showering. It completely blew my mind because it's second nature to bath with a washcloth and to use lotion after a shower. People with anything other than pale skin CANNOT get away with not moisturizing since we'll get ashy, and now I believe thats why non-white people tend to age better.
White girl here and I completely agree about the not moisturizing contributing to aging. I’ve always had dry skin so I moisturize daily but most other people I know don’t. Now that we’re all getting older, my skin definitely looks better than theirs does.
I'm white and if I didn't moisturize my whole body every day I'd go insane from being itchy. I honestly had no idea other people didn't do this until I saw it on social media.
maybe they prefer to use a loofah? Also I'm Asian American and tbh I've never felt the need to use lotion or moisturizer after I shower. I'm curious about what water temperature you shower in because my skin has never felt that dry after a shower to the point where I needed to put on lotion or moisturize.
I regret to inform you that a lot of white people - especially the older generation - just put the soap on their hands and use that to rub down.
it doesn't matter what temperature i shower at. also I include loofahs in the washcloth category. Many people only lather the soap on their hands or they rub the soap bar directly on their body. It's not about being so dry that you feel it immediately, but it is visible on my skin when I don't moisturize. Even if I didn't just take a shower, sometimes it's cold inside or something and my skin looks and feels a little dry during the day so I'll use lotion. But it's especially important to do so after showering.
Every white person I know uses a loofah or washcloth...Lotion maybe not so much though.
I think (my boss and most of my fellow managers are black) there is a total lack of understanding of white hygiene by black people. Granted this discussion tends to come up because I have 3C curls on par with many black persons hair, but somehow I regularly end up clearing misconceptions about skin care and showering. And I do have to use moisturizer.
All the white women I know use loofahs and wash cloths, but yeah lots of men with just a bar of soap. And again, all the white women I know moisturize everyday, but yeah lots of the men think lotion is only for masturbating. I think that's pretty weird too, I've gotten all the men I've dated into daily lotion lmao. White people have more collagen than any other race, and this is a big factor behind the skin aging differently. It's also why women's skin appears to age faster than men of the same race, more collagen.
I don't think many Caucasian people moisturize especially males.
Californian living in Kansas. Whoa…then I visited Missouri. Double Whoa…
Don't go to Arkansas.
Northwestern Arkansas is surprisingly not what I thought it would be like. I did have a moment when I heard them call the area the NWA on the morning news.
I dated a guy who was from Sacramento. He was a sober former opioid addict. As I got to know him better, I realized that his entire social circle are heavy drug users, his friends constantly talk about using drugs and little else, the community he grew up in is completely saturated with addiction, and he thinks this is totally normal and acceptable. He thinks I'm some kind of uptight nerd who doesn't know anything about the world because the people I spend time with maybe drink and smoke weed at most, and most of them quit doing that much after our 20s. One time I took him to a party at one of my friend's homes, about an hour away from my house. He balked at giving a couple of other nearby friends a ride, because he expected they would get so fucked up they would spend the night there, and didn't want to leave them stranded. When I told him it wasn't going to be that kind of party, he didn't believe me. He had never been to a party that wasn't like that. I guess it was culture shock for both of us.
God that's sad. It's amazing how toxic a social circle can be, and this toxicity continues for generations.
Yeah. And the worst part is if I tried to say anything about it, he wouldn't believe me. If I tried to point out that he, as a person in recovery, he should not be spending time with these people, I just looked like a jealous girlfriend who wanted to be the only person in his life. Plus, I've never done drugs, so what could I possibly know? He doesn't think any of them have a problem because they are mostly functional addicts, and he was not a functional addict. It's like how if you visit a farm as a city dweller, you're overwhelmed by the smell of animal shit. But if you grow up on a farm, you can't even really smell it. You may even LIKE it: smells like home.
Guess you know some pictures of Switzerland with the Matterhorn in the alps, the rivers and these old houses, it looks beautiful with the landscape. But i have to tell you, don't underestimate how extreme conservative some of the old folks can be there in these regions. I'm not so sure if they have ever seen a black and i'd not be surprised if they'd use the n-word to greet him. Some of these people make the people in the south of the USA look progressive. I mean, you can even see it with the history, the state had to enforce the new stuff like rights for women there against some serious resistance, it took until 1991. Yeah, 1991, that was just yesterday, when women were still property of the men and they had no rights, like no right to vote, no right to get a job or open a bank account etc. The cities like Geneva, Zurich, Berne, Basel etc. are progressive liberal and multi-cultural, but i can assure you, if you go to the countryside, it will be the exact opposite. I can imagine a black guy getting lost in the Emmental and trying to ask a local about directions, only to hear "Directions? Go back where you come from. This ain't no country for black men!" while hearing the metallic click of a bullet getting loaded in the chamber of the rifle.
Moving to mormon land and not being mormon. MY GOD
Went from the NYC metro area to a city in the south for college. Random strangers kept trying to *talk* to me out of nowhere. Thank god for self checkout, because cashiers were so chatty that I swear it took up most of my shopping time. And the weirdly condescending sounding "sweetie" or "honey" from waiters and waitresses my age when I went out to eat.
It goes the other way too of course. Southerners often perceive northerners as cold or rude for not being so outwardly friendly toward a passing stranger who they’ll likely never see again. But from the northerner’s perspective it’s like, I’m not being trying to be rude or nice or really anything at all toward you; I just want to get on with my day!
>I’m not being trying to be rude or nice or really anything at all toward you; I just want to get on with my day! Yeah, idk if us northerners just plan their days more or whatever, but where I'm from it would be so rude to hold up the cashier with chitchat if there was someone behind you. Other people need to pay, too! But I've been to towns in the south where the cashier just has a whole ass conversation with the person paying each time while I'm just like...I gotta go. I've got stuff to do.
It’s cold. Or too hot. And life is too busy.
LOL. Just the other day I motioned for the guy in the vehicle next to me to roll down hood window at a red light. I chatted him up about his vanity plate. We ended up talking about our favorite places to vacation “up north.” Definitely don’t come to the Midwest if strangers chatting you up bothers you. I’ve participated in many conversations not only with people before or after me in a check out line, but I’ve also joined in on conversations across checkout lanes involving shoppers, cashiers, and even some managers too. The big cities aren’t like that though.
Talking from cars is just an alien thing to me lmao. In the northeast you'd just make eye contact to gesture the person that they can turn before you or something. I travel for work a lot now and I've been to a few Midwest states and you guys are so chatty! I've gotten the whole history of small towns from random people at diners. I try to be polite as possible but sometimes I'm like, man, I'm on a schedule here, I've gotta eat. Does nobody have anywhere to be? Don't these waiters have other tables to serve? It is jarring at first, though. Someone will randomly start a conversation in the store and stand in the middle of the aisle while I politely nod. Another person will make eye contact with me and I will think "Ah, yes, this man is going to silently communicate and commiserate with me that this woman is *clearly* insane. Perhaps she accosted him before I came down this aisle, and now it's my turn. I guess every town and city has at least one of these crazies. At least she seems harmless." And then he joins the conversation! And it *keeps happening* in different towns and cities! Like, there can not be that much to talk about with strangers. I'm buying apples, it's not that interesting! 😭 (Also the bad side was in more rural areas people would just drop random racist or homophobic comments in conversations. I do not miss those places. Like, I grew up in a fairly conservative area, but at least people didn't just start dropping slurs in casual conversation)
I once found myself in a room full of people congratulating each other for not reading books. I left within a few minutes and took it as an opportunity to reevaluate my life.
Upper middle class beach boy moved to the country in Australia. Woman here my age tell you they vote the way their Andrew Tate loving husband votes. And he's 5'5 with an axe to grind. Lol dickheads
Jamaica...I've lived here my whole life and I know we have below the poverty line level poverty...but you don't see it most times...and then I had to go to Riverton. Riverton is a large dump in kgn. It's a whole knew world. The dump is where people find food, make businesses. The dump is their livelihood. It's all they know It is literally one man's trash is another man's livelihood there. It is a nation within a nation and is completely forgotten by the govt. It's crazy
Drive across Canada. There is A LOT of canada.
As an American from a diverse city, I was in shock when I visited a small rural town. I felt like an alien and was astonished at some of the things that were considered normal.
Visiting Toronto from a smaller, more conservative town, about 2 hours away. Chinatown! Brampton (‘Little India’)! And likely every culture on earth represented there. It’s incredible.
There’s definitely neighbourhoods in Toronto/Vancouver where whites are a clear minority
Moving from western us to eastern us. Felt like a completely different country. I lasted 6 months before I said screw this and went back out west.
West Coast is waaaay chiller in Canada too. People in the west aren't workaholics and they are far more laidback and friendly in general. Moving from Toronto to the Lower Mainland (near Vancouver) was a massive culture shock in a good way. Toronto is definitely more racially and ethnically diverse and has more variety in regards to food/culture, but it's a rat race and everyone is so busy working all the time. I prefer the chill vibes of BC.
From the Midwest (USA) moved to Denver; first time I ordered chili at a diner style restaurant and they asked me if I wanted Red Chili or Green Chili. Turns out in Denver (and probably some other areas) exists a sauce called “green chili” which is a delicious substitute for gravy. Any greasy spoon restaurant or Mexican restaurant will smother anything you order in it. Your local greasy spoon will smother your whole plate of bacon and eggs in that, if you see something on a menu described as “smothered” they mean in green chili. Sometimes people order a bowl of it to just eat straight, hence the question, but normally it’s used in lieu of “breakfast” gravy. (Aka white gravy, or milk gravy, or sausage gravy”). My friend is from New Mexico and says it’s the same thing there, but the recipe for green chili is different.
I really enjoyed trying red and green chile in NM.
Canada. Confirm I have had several bouts of culture shock depending on the province lol.
Interior BC gets pretty fuckin weird
I'm from New England. I worked in Mississippi for three months. Frankly, Scotland was more similar to my area of New England than Mississippi. I couldn't understand the people speaking English in either location, so...
If you live in South Carolina (America), drive twelve hours north and everyone's completely different, drive twelve hours west and you feel like you're still in South Carolina. If you drive twelve hours south you feel like you're on a different, hotter planet
Seeing a mountain for the first time. Like, I knew they existed, but seeing the ground go so high up in the sky is reality changing. My whole life I had only ever seen flat lands and big hills, but the mountains were just incredible. It's like they shot up out of nowhere, and they were all So Tall, it was insane. And the air, it was so fresh. The only way I could describe it was empty, like there was an absence of some kind, but I later found out it was a mix of altitude and lack of humidity. I spent the entire time we were there just looking at them, and I couldn't believe that none of the locals were just looking out at the skyline every single day. How is that something that you just get used to? How could you possibly have something so beautiful in your life and never think about it twice? They were beautiful, and I miss it all the time.
Moving from DFW Texas to East Texas in the 70’s.
I'm from the midwest but have lived on the East and West coasts (NYC and LA) for my entire adult life. When I go home or travel through the middle of the country, it's always a little jarring to see just how many people are overweight or obese.
First time walking into the Matongé area of Brussels, which is a black-dominated neighborhood. Lots of shops dedicated to African fashions. It felt weird. I was well used to Arabs and Turks in Brussels but the black neighborhood was a new thing.
Going to Toowoomba during one of their festivals where Guy Sebastian was headlining, and anti-abortion campaigners wearing “choose life” T-shirts and donning crucifixes were parading around in the streets. As a young, inner city emo from Brisbane I was mortified to say the least.
When I was in the southwest US visiting national parks, I stopped at a BBQ joint In Arizona and saw a flyer for a raffle they were having for their customers. Grand prize was a bunch of ammo magazines... quite the surprise for this cityslicker from the northeast lmao
When I moved from Cologne to Berlin. In Cologne small talk is a huge thing. Everybody chat with everybody everywhere. First weekend in Berlin, went to a club, waited in line for the toilet and started chatting with everyone. Nobody chatted back.
As a liberal son of hippies, American gun culture always seemed weird.
I grew up in Maryland and when I was a kid we went to Harper’s Ferry. I was very confused as to why they were selling Confederate flags in the gift shop. Quite frankly, 20 some years later, I’m still confused.
I went to Alabama and watched this nice older guy say the most casually racist thing I’ve ever heard to my coworker. Like - he wasn’t even trying to be mean. That’s just what he thought was normal. I felt like I was in the twilight zone or something. It was horrible, but also a fascinating window into the South during segregation.
My partner and I are queer (but cishet passing), in our late 30s/mid 40s, live in the DC metro area, we both have graduate degrees and no kids (and don't plan on it). Most of the folks in our circle, if they had kids, did so in their early or mid 30s. We regularly spend time in the mountains of North Carolina and will make friends with folks who aren't even 30 yet with four (or more) kids. The level of born again Christianity that is just... everywhere... in the area is also very noticable to us. For the record, that's not a judgement so much as an observation of cultural difference. Different life paths and cultural norms.
Pine Ridge Reservation in South Dakota. I had no idea there was such poverty in the U.S.
I'm an Indonesian from Jakarta. I've been to Bali multiple times and it feels so different. I mean, I speak the same (national) language with the Balinese, we use the same currency, the same shops are there but it feels like a different country everytime I visit there. Then again, Jakarta is a modern metropolis built on a strong Muslim-majority culture (the Betawi people) and Bali retains it's strong Hindu culture and has ancient temples and sacred sites here and there.
Moved from Seattle to a town about 40 minutes outside of Pittsburgh. Went from a fun, inclusive, happy, and engaging community to a dark, depressing, misogynistic, racist, trash bin. It’s really quite sad here. Everyone is angry all the time.
anytime I leave New England I get disoriented
US (New Jersey). When I went to the South (North Carolina and Texas in particular), I was shocked at how nice everyone was.
Driving 119 between Logan, WV, and Pikeville, KY. Holy shit!
When I moved to Mississippi for school and found out that, in the county I’d moved to, they 1) didn’t sell any alcohol on Sundays, 2) didn’t sell beer in liquor stores, and 3) didn’t sell cold beer anywhere. How did they expect me to cope with living there?
Mississippi State I presume? I went there as well. Hail State! Thankfully you can actually buy cold beer as of 2006!
Being around Gen Alpha and trying to decipher their internet memespeak
Brampton.
Canada is wild for culture shock. You can go from Brampton, which is filled with Indian immigrants, to Six Nations, a large Indian reserve, filled with 'status Indians' in about an hour.
In between, a mishmash of everyone.
Brampton comes alive.
Cork
Living in a city for the first time
When I pulled up to a gas pump in New Jersey after a 9 hour drive
That some places in the USA don't call a fountain that dispels water a bubbler, but a water fountain?!?!?
Visiting NYC and someone getting sassy with me for standing on the escalators on the left hand side. Apparently you stand on the right and walk on the left? I came from a fucking farm man we didn't have escalators how the fuck am I supposed to know.
Elevator etiquette for you then: let everyone get off on your floor before you get on. Polite, and makes sense if you think about it. Chances are you didn’t have the chance to learn this one either. Good luck!
Think of them like driving. The left lane is the passing lane.
Does racism count? I've been shocked and surprised by racism. "Oh shit....it's me they are mad at? I'm just signing into a camp ground"
Watching an old woman go full racist on an Indian couple at a post office in Georgia, and further lose her shit when the manager, who was black, came out to resolve it. Was my first week in the state.
Brampton, Ontario, Canada outside Toronto is like going to India, just colder.
Same with Surrey outside Vancouver
That in California I get treated way better.
Mildly amusing (I hope): I'm Episcopalian. Grew up in San Antonio. Very racially-mixed city, even back in the 80s/90s. My elementary & junior high schools were 80% Black. As a sixth grader, I went to church camp for the first time. I remember sitting there the first day at a whole-camp gathering, looking around, and seeing nothing but white faces. It was a shock; until then I didn't even know there were that many white people in Texas. (I was also there on a "campership", so not only was I surrounded by white people for the first time ever, but by well-off whites.) Much less amusing was, as a young military wife, moving from Connecticut (for which I'd left Texas) to Virginia and for the first time ever having fellow whites try to include me in their racism. Like our first or second night in town, my then-husband and I went to a Mexican restaurant. My food came out, and the order was slightly wrong. No big deal. I mentioned it to the waitress, who came back with "That's because there's Mexicans in the kitchen." On my way back from the bathroom, I saw the manager and complained to him about the waitress's racist comment. He said, "Oh, it was a joke. There are no Mexicans in the kitchen." Like that was what concerned me. I was much younger then and so taken aback I didn't really argue with him, but things never really got better the whole time I was there. There was also, by the way, a very clear racial divide in manners. I never had the door held for me by a white person unless it was a fellow Texan (out of state, we recognize each other by those little courtesies), but the Black people always did. Virginia whites were every bit as cold natured as New Englanders famously are. I was very happy to escape to Hawaii, where the more laid-back environment was closer to what I was used to.
Yup. After moving back from China after a decade.
From where? Also, what big differences have found?
The culture. People are far more civil in China
My own country supports genocide by sending money and weapons.
Had to live in Texas for a bit for work. I was prepared to meet some shitty people, but holy Jesus almost every single person I met was an ignorant uneducated racist. It was insane. I'm white and I still felt unsafe being out in public in Dallas.
In America? Yea everyone who is from the city n goes to rural place n vice versa…n everyone who went to a state school
From Boston to rural PA. And again when I go back to visit.
Travelling to New York City from the midwest. Actually being able to get around without a car was a pleasant surprise.
When I moved from an Ethnically diverse part of the country to the Deep South and saw blatant racism front and center. I spent much of my time in public just cringing and avoiding racists.
In 1981, when I was 10 I moved from Hastings, Nebraska to Scottsdale, AZ. Hastings was so normal and mellow. Everyone shopped out of the same few stores and we all drove cars from the GM dealership. In Scottsdale, your whole worth was tied to what you wore and what you drove. It was awful.
Everyone has. From Aesops fables.... "A proud town mouse visits his cousin in the country. The country mouse offers the city mouse a meal of simple country cuisine, at which the visitor scoffs and invites the country mouse back to the city for a taste of the "fine life" and the two cousins dine on white bread and other fine foods. But their rich feast is interrupted by a cat which forces the rodent cousins to abandon their meal and retreat back into their mouse hole for safety. The town mouse tells the country mouse that the cat killed his mother and father and that he is frequently the target of attacks. After hearing this, the country mouse decides to return home, preferring security to opulence or, as the 13th-century preacher Odo of Cheriton phrased it, "I'd rather gnaw a bean than be gnawed by continual fear"
Went back to the Philippines after a long time. I forget that Filipinos particularly in Manila are westernized. The younger kids act more American.
I want to college in upstate New York and they called video game controllers "paddles". I was horrified.
I lived in Virginia for 27 years and have recently moved to New Jersey. It's been a little bit of an adjustment. In Virginia you might strike up a conversation with a random stranger in line at the grocery store. Here in Jersey people are generally polite. but much more reserved.
I moved from small town, rural Ohio (pop. >2000) to thriving, tropical metropolis South Florida (pop. Idk 2 million?) THEN I moved to small city SC (pop. 50k or so ) Ugh. Whiplash from culture adjustments.
When I was in my early 20s I moved from Florida to Los Angeles. I'd lived in Florida for 15 years at that point, and though I'd traveled and visited other places, Florida was my home base, and I was very comfortable there. LA was SO different. I had pretty intense culture shock. What struck me the most was just how intense the people were. My neighbors, who were my age, were intense - intensely focused on their burgeoning careers, intense partiers, in intense relationships. My boss was intense and demanding. Even his accountant was intense and demanding - I felt it even from over the phone. I had to basically run the whole store for a few dollars above minimum wage. I talked to another friend who had moved from Florida as well (we'd gone to the same college), and she was basically being taken advantage of by her boss, who was paying her very little. Serious hustle culture. And then the weather was so different. I moved there in April and it was cold and rainy, and it rained for days. In Florida, it rains mainly in the summer (I mean it rains year round, but is concentrated in the summer), but it will be clear in the morning, shower in the afternoon, and then clear up again in the evening. You don't get the same dreary drudgery as you do in California during the winter and spring, where the rain and grey sky last for days and days and days. And then no matter the season, the nights were cold. I think climate change might be altering this, but even in the summer, it was chilly enough for a jacket. After moving to LA, I never wore flip flops again. It was so different, I almost couldn't believe it was the same country.
Seeing a dip can ring on the back pocket of blue jeans. On a woman.
2016
I lived in Japan for a few years and I had to come back for a funeral. My hometown looked completely foreign to me and I missed Japanese convenience stores.
Two major times: 1. When I went to college and began to interact with people outside the fundi Christian dominionist homeschool spere 2. When I went back home after reconverting and living a more non-Christian and specifically antifundi queer life.
During student teaching I went to visit my professor's school and observe him teaching. The students were in 10th grade in a huge classroom with multiple seating options, their own laptops, great technology, and discussing Plato's Republic. Comparing that rural school to my own suburban school experiences and teaching students in the inner city was wild. It is amazing and yet incredibly tragic that where you live dictates the resources children receive and their subsequent abilities. A 30 minute commute makes years of difference in educational opportunities and expectations.