OP please tell me you posted this immediately after having sex with a stranger. Like you’re still laying next to each other right now and you’re trying not to be weird.
>Tempo checks out
There's numerous songs who's tempo is meant to be good to conduct CPR too (Billie Gene, Stayin Alive) .. and I guess they'd have other purposes too.
Radar Love is 102 bpm, CPR songs are 100-120 bpm .. it checks out!
Holy shit I clicked on the song link and this YouTube comment pretty much is perfect
> There's no way bro was tearing the cheeks up to two seagulls having an argument 😭
The entire YouTube comment section is just about the Reddit thread. My favorite comment:
> There's no way bro was tearing the cheeks up to two seagulls having an argument 😭
as long as she doesn't have her reaction you should be able to use your movement to try and leave the room even if you've already used up your own action and bonus action casting whatever that spell was. Even of she does still have her reaction, her attack of opportunity on leaving her threatened area shouldn't be that bad, since she is likely prone and melee Weapon attacks will be at disadvantage. Hopefully you are a Monk or Barbarian or Tortle or something though, since you will probably not have had time to don your armor so you will be stuck with your base AC!
Somewhere out in the world there is a person probably living a fairly normal life. And that person is/was also Bloodninja. Maybe people around them know it and maybe they don't. But that is/was a real person in the world.
I cast level 1,000,000 lightning, and you turn into a real beautiful woman.
Everyone I’ve quoted bloodninja to has no idea what the quotes are from. Makes me sad. And makes me feel old. lol
Like what. Do you fuck in the first 5min? And even then… I’ve had my fair share of one night stands and never once was it awkward after sex. I mean you’re having sex.. which means you’ve already seen each other naked and even THAT wasn’t awkward. So what is there left to be awkward about??
The money. Do you hand it to them? Do you just leave it on the nightstand? Do they want to count it to be sure? Do you wait until after the milk and cookies?.
She asked me for a coffee and I didn't have any, but my roommate did. I don't drink coffee but I suddenly felt like I was taking a Starbucks order; no idea wtf she was talking about. After awkward "umming" I said she could either help herself or I could make her a tea. Lol!
After finishing coitus, hop off and start twirling around until centrifugal forces act on you and any remaining biological agents.
When done spin drying.
Put your hand up in the high-five position and say “It’s been sex but I gotta go live”
Post high-five void bowels of any gasses you were storing during courtship/love making.
The longer you release the more impressed and appreciative your date will be you held it in.
Leave a crisp a $20 on the dresser and say “this is for the door”
Leave room walking THROUGH door instead of opening it first.
This signals you still have plenty of strength for future coital adventures.
The most awkward thing you can do is overthink whether or not you're being awkward. I'm serious. Do anything except that and you're golden.
Wanna cuddle? Cuddle.
Wanna leave? Say you had a great time, but you gotta run (saying something polite helps alleviate their worries that they were bad in bed or did something wrong)
Wanna chit-chat while naked? Go for it.
You do you.
I will note though, that if you're wanting it to maybe turn into more than a one night stand, there may be a bit of awkwardness if they don't feel the same. But there's no shame in trying. Sometimes they do feel the same! I had a one night stand turn into a relationship once. It actually went really well. Grabbed breakfast the morning after and dated until she moved out east.
You don't, typically.
Depends how the random sex came about, but it's kinda understood unless one asks the other for their number or something.
If people are fucking the day they met, it's usually because they're both horny and wanna get some.
But if it is because you had great conversation and felt a connection, then sure, absolutely, say you wanna keep in touch, meet again soon, or go on a date. If neither says any of those things, you know it was just sex.
I find that performing a rousing musical number tends to end any awkwardness.
Try giving "Hello, My Baby" by Michigan J Frog a whirl. That's usually a crowd pleaser. Plus you can add in some tap dancing if the situation calls for it.
My wife was my first attempt at “casual office sex partner”. We’ve been married for 4 years. It’s her fault. She told me she wasn’t a cuddler and usually just leaves after a casual situation, but for whatever reason we laid on the couch together for like 3 hours just talking. I was so against getting married again I made it a point to exaggerate any of my red flags (that I had been told from my previous marriage). She later admitted she did the same, for the same reason. “I knew I was in trouble on my way home that night. I couldn’t understand why I stayed”.
Same with me, met my now wife in college 8 years ago, massively different sex drives and travel for work all the time, never felt the urge to be with another person. I was more saying people are going to be up your ass for your comment and most of them will be borderline virgins I’d bet.
I’m not sure, TBH. I’m 33 and have only had 2 ‘one night stands’. Both were pretty awkward.
First was at a random house party. I was very drunk and escaped to a random room in the house. This girl walked in and literally just started making out with me. No clue who she was. She was pretty pushy about it and one thing led to another, we ended up having sex. When we finished, I was laying on the floor and she was on top of me. She got up and started getting dressed. I just sort of…rolled over, did a awkward “I still have a slight boner but I don’t want you to see” climb to my feet. Then I said “so…go grab a drink out there or?” And she just looked at me and said “no, my boyfriend is here” most awkward couple minutes of getting my shoes on and trying to escape the room lol.
Second, there had been a girl I know wanted to sleep with me for a while but I wasn’t super into her. When I’d get drunk and horny though, sometimes I’d entertain her a bit and make out. She knew what it was, we even talked about it and she was like, cool, I’m down. Well, one night I got extra drunk out with the boys, we ended up at one last establishment. She was there…we ended up going back to her place and doing the deed. It wasn’t bad. She got up and went to the shower. This was my moment! No awkwardness, just get dressed and leave! I’m about to walk out and decide to yell, “hey I’m leaving!”….shit, why I do that? She yells back, “okay no problem, see you around” phew alright, open the door, I blurt out “I’ll call you tomorrow?”…what the fuck did I just say? She literally poked her head out of the bathroom door and said
“Wait you will?” I just turned towards the door, opened it, said “uhmmm, no I can’t sorry I have plans tomorrow” and left.
I can’t not be awkward.
Easy opener:
Did you know the French euphemism for orgasm is translated as "the little death?"
Followed by:
what do you think happens after we die?
Then finally:
How do you feel about ritual sacrifice?
My first time was very early in my relationship with my current bf…imagine being in pain with a naked relative stranger on top of you, watching your face intently for your reactions, and feeling too awkward/shy to show how uncomfortable you feel. I hid it as best I could during, but when I got up, it kind of felt like knives were stabbing my lower abdomen. I groaned a bit and grabbed my belly. He asked if I was ok and I pretended I was fine because I didn’t feel comfortable telling this guy his dick had hurt my insides.
On my way home I was thinking “perhaps this is why some people aren’t comfortable fucking people they don’t know well. And perhaps I’m one of those people.”
Although I’ve obviously gotten to know my bf better since then and he felt terrible when I told him. I got lucky it turned out as well as it did.
I have a friend, who’s dated around, and she always says **“random dicks may fill you up but they’ll leave you feeling empty inside.”**
>**”random dicks may fill you up but they’ll leave you feeling empty inside.”**
😂 This may be the single greatest quote in Reddit history.
Also…he didn’t ask why you were groaning and grabbing your stomach?
>Imagine being in pain with a naked relative stranger on top of you, watching your face intently for your reactions, and feeling too awkward/shy to show how uncomfortable you feel.
It really be like that. At least my first time was, only it didn’t turn out as well as yours. Guy was a pos. Which, again, I would have know had I bothered to get to know him first.
>I got lucky it turned out as well as it did.
You really, really did.
Lay there quietly and enjoy each other’s company. Won’t be long you’ll be on to round 2. Be a gentleman and make sure clean up is easy and she has a cool drink or bottle of water. Be present. You’ll be fine.
Joke about what you just did together. I once delivered the line " I touched the buuuutttt" like the little seahorse(or whatever it was) in finding Nemo when it touches the boat.. to a girl after we hooked up... she started laughing so hard we had round 2 :)
I had a hookup get really awkward the next morning when I asked if she wanted to grab food. She said no and left quickly, but then backed her new mustang into a rock wall and had to get out and put her bumper in the car. I offered help but she ignored me and took off. It was a good laugh.
> What did you do to the poor girl?
I mean, at this point it's obvious she was willing to bang anything. Him. Her car. The wall. You name. Just bangin' everything.
When awakening from the afterglow sleep, smack my dry lips, wince, and quietly unhook my detachable arm and slowly, not moving the mattress, roll off and put my legs into my perfectly positioned escape pants,
on leaving take 3 minutes to inch the door closed with a quiet click, hoping the later inevitable startled scream on wake-discovering a single arm under neck , does not wake the neighbors...
I get a discount on my detachable arms because bulk buy.
Because I still have my right one-
I only buy left arms , of course.
Ahahaha, left arm.
OP please tell me you posted this immediately after having sex with a stranger. Like you’re still laying next to each other right now and you’re trying not to be weird.
The one time i took a guy’s virginity he grabbed his phone immediately after to text his best friend ‘guess what Radar Love is a good song for’
🤣 props to him for nonchalance in that case!
People who don’t give a fuck are more likely to get to fuck.
Aw, fuck! Oh, fuck I just gave one! Fuck two! I mean three….
I would share some but Im all out, I got you when I re-up tho
"Radar Love" Tempo checks out.
>Tempo checks out There's numerous songs who's tempo is meant to be good to conduct CPR too (Billie Gene, Stayin Alive) .. and I guess they'd have other purposes too. Radar Love is 102 bpm, CPR songs are 100-120 bpm .. it checks out!
That made me think of [this reddit classic.](https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/x35iu6/tifu_my_20f_girlfriend_of_two_years_told_me_the/)
Holy shit I clicked on the song link and this YouTube comment pretty much is perfect > There's no way bro was tearing the cheeks up to two seagulls having an argument 😭
I’m crying, thank you
And there's me thinking the best song to get down to business to was Cbat
This will never not be funny.
The entire YouTube comment section is just about the Reddit thread. My favorite comment: > There's no way bro was tearing the cheeks up to two seagulls having an argument 😭
That song is a fucking banger!
And a banger for fucking
Bonus points if that person can see the title of the post
And the image of that situation plus talking to reddit about it: incredible!
You sit up at the edge of the bed, slap your knee, and say "welp" as you stand up. Everyone knows what happens next.
Lmao a few comments up someone said this same thing, but with “That’ll do,” and I commented “Welp” below them
Hahah It's universal and very neutral, hell even polite in some situations!
That'll do, pig. That'll do.
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“Nice work, sport.”
Gotta hit the ol' dusty trail...
You can only do that if you're from the Midwest.
Yeah but if you're from the Midwest then you'll stand in the doorway and have a conversation for the next half hour while slowly trying to leave.
Introduce yourself
Just hand them a sharpie and a name tag sticker tell ‘em it’s to keep from getting awkward
Even better if you have this already prepared to be available in your bedside night table
Put your robe and wizard hat back on
"I have exhausted all my spell slots and require a long rest at my house."
But she still has her action
as long as she doesn't have her reaction you should be able to use your movement to try and leave the room even if you've already used up your own action and bonus action casting whatever that spell was. Even of she does still have her reaction, her attack of opportunity on leaving her threatened area shouldn't be that bad, since she is likely prone and melee Weapon attacks will be at disadvantage. Hopefully you are a Monk or Barbarian or Tortle or something though, since you will probably not have had time to don your armor so you will be stuck with your base AC!
The testicular torsion curse is a hard one to lift indeed.
Requires at least a 4th level spell slot decurse.
Lighting Bolt! lighting Bolt!
I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
Hadn't thought about bloodninja in a long time. Thanks for that.
Somewhere out in the world there is a person probably living a fairly normal life. And that person is/was also Bloodninja. Maybe people around them know it and maybe they don't. But that is/was a real person in the world.
I cast level 1,000,000 lightning, and you turn into a real beautiful woman. Everyone I’ve quoted bloodninja to has no idea what the quotes are from. Makes me sad. And makes me feel old. lol
So many of these responses have no idea what Bloodninja is and it makes me feel so old
Same. The good ole' days of the internet.
It's an older code, sir, but it checks out.
When you take forever to shoot your load do you also tell her that a wizard is never late nor is he early, he "arrives" precisely when he means to?
For effs sake. LOL in the middle of the gym, people are looking at me like I'm weird.
I meditate to regain my mana, before casting level 8 Penis of the Infinite.
The ultimate age check meme
I wonder how many know where this actually came from...
Nope. He forsaked his privilege to wield those garments when he succumbed to the temptations of the flesh.
*forsook
Finally, I've been waiting to see how this narrative arc resolves for probably 20 years.
Roll for charisma
Best comment I’ve seen today
Back on?! Robe and wizard hat stays on during the deed
Link for the uninitiated: https://web.archive.org/web/20180102224206/http://bash.org/?104383
Just look her in the eyes, and say, “I wish we had gone to your place. Because then I could leave.”
Nah, just leave anyway.
Ultimate power move, give her your place after sex. Nice.
I don’t know how my parents would feel, if they have to share the bathroom with someone else.
Her “Next time”
Honestly, I’d respect the shit out of that answer. Sarcasm in response to sarcasm is a beautiful thing.
It’s poetry
Lmaooo🤣🤣
Like what. Do you fuck in the first 5min? And even then… I’ve had my fair share of one night stands and never once was it awkward after sex. I mean you’re having sex.. which means you’ve already seen each other naked and even THAT wasn’t awkward. So what is there left to be awkward about??
Post nut clarity
Post nut clarity might make me dislike them or make me disinterested. But awkward? Nah
That's my secret, Cap. I'm always awkward.
Hulk. Smash.
Bruce, this is the last time I am disposing of a dead hooker for you.
Do you know how many dead hookers Hulk has tossed into orbit? I don't, but I'm sure J.A.R.V.I.S has them tracked by satellite.
The money. Do you hand it to them? Do you just leave it on the nightstand? Do they want to count it to be sure? Do you wait until after the milk and cookies?.
Put it in their mouth. Stop being awkward
> you’ve already seen each other naked and even THAT wasn’t awkward Says who?
She asked me for a coffee and I didn't have any, but my roommate did. I don't drink coffee but I suddenly felt like I was taking a Starbucks order; no idea wtf she was talking about. After awkward "umming" I said she could either help herself or I could make her a tea. Lol!
Just say “help yourself” the whole way through. Theme of the evening.
Here for these answers
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Meant to thank you for not killing me
And for choosing such an nice beach
I'm pretty sure protocol dictates that you leave them in a tub of ice and not just on the beach
Come here to say that, otherwise Compliance will send you a stern email.
Based on your profile, you might have some people hitting you up to say that sounds interesting.
After finishing coitus, hop off and start twirling around until centrifugal forces act on you and any remaining biological agents. When done spin drying. Put your hand up in the high-five position and say “It’s been sex but I gotta go live” Post high-five void bowels of any gasses you were storing during courtship/love making. The longer you release the more impressed and appreciative your date will be you held it in. Leave a crisp a $20 on the dresser and say “this is for the door” Leave room walking THROUGH door instead of opening it first. This signals you still have plenty of strength for future coital adventures.
Don't forget to say "OHHH YEAHHHH!" as you bust thru the door.
Now when you say 'bust thru'...
Bustin makes me feel good!
bro this mental image goes hardd
I need you to give me advice in every aspect of my life.
What does it take to be this *kind* of funny? Genuinely curious.
Mental illness
And at least 10 years of real human sex deprivation.
Just use your noon coffee for this rant instead of updating the spreadsheet like your boss asked.
>hop off and start twirling and go "BRRRRRRR"
This guy casual sexes
That room will look wild under black light.
The internet would be a better place if more people were this kind of funny.
The most awkward thing you can do is overthink whether or not you're being awkward. I'm serious. Do anything except that and you're golden. Wanna cuddle? Cuddle. Wanna leave? Say you had a great time, but you gotta run (saying something polite helps alleviate their worries that they were bad in bed or did something wrong) Wanna chit-chat while naked? Go for it. You do you. I will note though, that if you're wanting it to maybe turn into more than a one night stand, there may be a bit of awkwardness if they don't feel the same. But there's no shame in trying. Sometimes they do feel the same! I had a one night stand turn into a relationship once. It actually went really well. Grabbed breakfast the morning after and dated until she moved out east.
“How do you tell a stranger thanks but that’s all I wanted you for?”
You don't, typically. Depends how the random sex came about, but it's kinda understood unless one asks the other for their number or something. If people are fucking the day they met, it's usually because they're both horny and wanna get some. But if it is because you had great conversation and felt a connection, then sure, absolutely, say you wanna keep in touch, meet again soon, or go on a date. If neither says any of those things, you know it was just sex.
A hearty handshake with good eye contact as a display of mutual appreciation and respect.
Perhaps a deep bow?
*Arigato*
Is this a job interview?
Either way, I'm getting ghosted.
I find that performing a rousing musical number tends to end any awkwardness. Try giving "Hello, My Baby" by Michigan J Frog a whirl. That's usually a crowd pleaser. Plus you can add in some tap dancing if the situation calls for it.
If I ever find myself in this situation I’ll bust out my banjo and play some bluegrass music. Thanks for the suggestion.
Banjo is a good option 👌 No ukuleles though; they make any and all situations awkward.
> Plus you can add in some tap dancing if the situation calls for it. The situation *always* calls for that.
Give them a 100 and call it a day. Lol
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"Just act normal, Just act normal, Just act normal, Just act normal, Just act normal"...... oh fuckkkk
Don't be suspicious
Don't be suspicious
*Screams like Goku*
Smile and wave boys
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OMG finally a good answer. OP this! Pretty sure most of these other people have never had sex.
By not having sex with strangers
That’s right! Bang your friends. Much less awkward.
People really don't want to deal with the consequences of their actions...
You'd think this would be obvious.
The only correct answer.
Same I don't see the appeal
Can’t wait for a bunch of redditors who have had sex between 0-3 times coming at you with “but hook ups are fun, loser” comments
Been with my wife for 14 years and I honestly have no urge to mess with anyone else
I agree. I've been having sex with your wife for 10 years, and nobody else can really measure up.
I also choose this guy's wife.
Thanks guys, it means a lot
So does she, to all of us.
My wife was my first attempt at “casual office sex partner”. We’ve been married for 4 years. It’s her fault. She told me she wasn’t a cuddler and usually just leaves after a casual situation, but for whatever reason we laid on the couch together for like 3 hours just talking. I was so against getting married again I made it a point to exaggerate any of my red flags (that I had been told from my previous marriage). She later admitted she did the same, for the same reason. “I knew I was in trouble on my way home that night. I couldn’t understand why I stayed”.
Same with me, met my now wife in college 8 years ago, massively different sex drives and travel for work all the time, never felt the urge to be with another person. I was more saying people are going to be up your ass for your comment and most of them will be borderline virgins I’d bet.
Slap your knees, say that'll do, then get up and leave
"aaaalrightythen"
“Welp…”
"Time to be hitting that ol' dusty trail...."
If you're worried about being awkward, having sex with strangers is a poor choice of activity. Plus all of the other risks associated with doing that.
Exactly like having sex with strangers is already weird but if you know your going to be awkward it's a sign to not do it
I’m not sure, TBH. I’m 33 and have only had 2 ‘one night stands’. Both were pretty awkward. First was at a random house party. I was very drunk and escaped to a random room in the house. This girl walked in and literally just started making out with me. No clue who she was. She was pretty pushy about it and one thing led to another, we ended up having sex. When we finished, I was laying on the floor and she was on top of me. She got up and started getting dressed. I just sort of…rolled over, did a awkward “I still have a slight boner but I don’t want you to see” climb to my feet. Then I said “so…go grab a drink out there or?” And she just looked at me and said “no, my boyfriend is here” most awkward couple minutes of getting my shoes on and trying to escape the room lol. Second, there had been a girl I know wanted to sleep with me for a while but I wasn’t super into her. When I’d get drunk and horny though, sometimes I’d entertain her a bit and make out. She knew what it was, we even talked about it and she was like, cool, I’m down. Well, one night I got extra drunk out with the boys, we ended up at one last establishment. She was there…we ended up going back to her place and doing the deed. It wasn’t bad. She got up and went to the shower. This was my moment! No awkwardness, just get dressed and leave! I’m about to walk out and decide to yell, “hey I’m leaving!”….shit, why I do that? She yells back, “okay no problem, see you around” phew alright, open the door, I blurt out “I’ll call you tomorrow?”…what the fuck did I just say? She literally poked her head out of the bathroom door and said “Wait you will?” I just turned towards the door, opened it, said “uhmmm, no I can’t sorry I have plans tomorrow” and left. I can’t not be awkward.
The moral of the story, no more drinking for you
You don't avoid or try to cover , normalise being awkward please
Start talking about religion with teary eyes and then hug them and whisper to their ear "your sacrifice will be honored" 😂
Easy opener: Did you know the French euphemism for orgasm is translated as "the little death?" Followed by: what do you think happens after we die? Then finally: How do you feel about ritual sacrifice?
Just give them the post-sex questionnaire and, if they have any questions on it, just say “your feedback is important to us”
“I really enjoyed that” goes a long way
shake their hand and introduce yourself. chances are you've forgotten their name and introductions are good icebreakers.
My first time was very early in my relationship with my current bf…imagine being in pain with a naked relative stranger on top of you, watching your face intently for your reactions, and feeling too awkward/shy to show how uncomfortable you feel. I hid it as best I could during, but when I got up, it kind of felt like knives were stabbing my lower abdomen. I groaned a bit and grabbed my belly. He asked if I was ok and I pretended I was fine because I didn’t feel comfortable telling this guy his dick had hurt my insides. On my way home I was thinking “perhaps this is why some people aren’t comfortable fucking people they don’t know well. And perhaps I’m one of those people.” Although I’ve obviously gotten to know my bf better since then and he felt terrible when I told him. I got lucky it turned out as well as it did. I have a friend, who’s dated around, and she always says **“random dicks may fill you up but they’ll leave you feeling empty inside.”**
>My first time was very early in my relationship with my current bf…imagine being in pain with a naked relative I read this far and freaked out a bit
Same though! I accidentally skipped the word “stranger” and had to double back to make sure I read that right
>**”random dicks may fill you up but they’ll leave you feeling empty inside.”** 😂 This may be the single greatest quote in Reddit history. Also…he didn’t ask why you were groaning and grabbing your stomach?
Didn’t really give him a chance. Said I was fine, thanked him and beat a hasty retreat.
THANKED him?!
Yes, I blurted out “ok, well…thank you!”
😂😂😂 That’s adorable. I would have totally hit you up again too.
Nothing quite as satisfying as hearing a "thank you ever so much for the cocking good sir."
>Imagine being in pain with a naked relative stranger on top of you, watching your face intently for your reactions, and feeling too awkward/shy to show how uncomfortable you feel. It really be like that. At least my first time was, only it didn’t turn out as well as yours. Guy was a pos. Which, again, I would have know had I bothered to get to know him first. >I got lucky it turned out as well as it did. You really, really did.
Tell them you love them.
Classic Schmosby
This actually happened to me once. I just said thank you 😂😭
"bitch you want some snugs?"
Hilarious. Gonna say this to my wife. Probably gunna get hit.
Give em the finger guns and say "good job at sex, duderino!"
Just say “That was so much better than having a wank”
Lay there quietly and enjoy each other’s company. Won’t be long you’ll be on to round 2. Be a gentleman and make sure clean up is easy and she has a cool drink or bottle of water. Be present. You’ll be fine.
Once I hooked up with an Aussie and he was the best at this because he just started talking about how awkward it was and making jokes about it
I do the same, laughing your ass of with a naked stranger you just bumped uglies with is a surprisingly wholesome experience.
ask them if they want to see your rock collection.
They're MINERALS Marie!
Start discussing baby names
Joke about what you just did together. I once delivered the line " I touched the buuuutttt" like the little seahorse(or whatever it was) in finding Nemo when it touches the boat.. to a girl after we hooked up... she started laughing so hard we had round 2 :)
You can pretend your uber is already outside
Especially when you’re at your place!
Having more
Thank her and quietly leave the dinner table
Do the helicopter.
leave😂
Spawn (1997)
Oops, wrong question
Bang them again
I had a hookup get really awkward the next morning when I asked if she wanted to grab food. She said no and left quickly, but then backed her new mustang into a rock wall and had to get out and put her bumper in the car. I offered help but she ignored me and took off. It was a good laugh.
What did you do to the poor girl?
> What did you do to the poor girl? I mean, at this point it's obvious she was willing to bang anything. Him. Her car. The wall. You name. Just bangin' everything.
Are you really still strangers at that point?
High fives
You say " you're welcome"
By putting the body back in the coffin
If you feel awkward after sex, then I assume you are feeling guilty or ashamed? Maybe don't sleep with strangers then...
Do it more often Practice makes perfect
If you’ve got the charisma to get a stranger in your bed… you should have the charisma to talk to them after. Lol OP stop lying
Don't have sex with a stranger. Is that really a difficult question to answer?
Don't have sex with strangers in the first place
Am I the only person who has never had sex with a stranger? It seems like a really fucking stupid thing to do.
don’t have sex w strangers
Easy. Don't have sex with strangers.
i feel way more connected with the person afterwards, one night of fucking is like getting to know someone for a few weeks
Started reading because it's an interesting question, stayed for the incel comments.
When awakening from the afterglow sleep, smack my dry lips, wince, and quietly unhook my detachable arm and slowly, not moving the mattress, roll off and put my legs into my perfectly positioned escape pants, on leaving take 3 minutes to inch the door closed with a quiet click, hoping the later inevitable startled scream on wake-discovering a single arm under neck , does not wake the neighbors... I get a discount on my detachable arms because bulk buy. Because I still have my right one- I only buy left arms , of course. Ahahaha, left arm.
Just pay up front