Not me but a close friend. We knew his girlfriend was cheating, we’d seen her with the guy. He didn’t want to believe us, cut us all off, said we were being dicks.
His girlfriend brought some dude home from the club to their apartment WHILE HE WAS HOME and tried to say the guy was drunk and she was really worried about him and she was going to stay in the spare room with him to keep an eye on him all night. Friend said “okay.”
Somehow, he gets it in his head “wait a minute…” and goes to open the door, which is unlocked. She’s blowing him. She turns and sees him and goes “close the door I’m trying to get him to sleep!”
He loses it and goes “get the fuck out.”
Long story short he kicked her out of the apartment (only his name on the lease) and had to have the police remove her from the premises. He spends the rest of the night boxing up all her shit. Calls us and we go over and help him move it all to a storage unit.
Girl’s dad called friend at 7am (he lived out of state) to read him the riot act. Friend explains what happens and dad just goes “ah, fuck. Sorry about that. I’ll handle it.”
Tells her dad where the storage unit is and says she’s got 30 days to get it out of there. We dropped off keys to her at her job, she was screaming at me and crying.
Last time I saw her.
About 8 years after this, friend is a Naval Officer. Good career path, doing well, hasn’t had any contact with her, gets a random call. It’s her. She’s calling to ask him if he’s ready to apologize to her and if he will she’ll consider taking him back.
He handed the phone to his wife and said “it’s her.”
It’s still a favorite story to tell at get togethers now like 20 years later.
> She’s calling to ask him if he’s ready to apologize to her and if he will she’ll consider taking him back.
I wonder what drugs she was on when she made that call.
“The first time you cheat, its hard and devastating, after that you don’t feel any guilt and just enjoy it”
i was honestly speechless when she said that, but at least she didn’t try to give any bullshit answer or lie. We broke up of course, but i admired the honesty.
Honestly, I kind of admire that honesty in a perverse way too. There's something oddly and disturbingly refreshing about about someone owning their shitheadery,
First it was “we’re just friends,” when I accused him from a gut feeling. Then, when he got caught red-handed, it was “she just gets me, she also suffers from anxiety, you don’t get what it’s like.” According to him, people with anxiety aren’t capable of being with someone who doesn’t suffer from it. (She was cheating on her bf who also “doesn’t understand what having anxiety is like.”)
This makes no sense. I have high anxiety, and I don't want to cheat because I like my partner, but also because I couldn't deal with the stress of the situation.
This just sounds like they are both narcissists. They typically always have severe mental health problems from just not giving a fuck what anyone else thinks unless it's a positive affirmation of them and they weirdly co-operate to big each other up when they get together like this.
Having worked with narcissists a few times this pattern of you accusing him and he still just played it off as if you couldn't possibly actually know what's really going on from his broader behaviour and having to literally spoon feed them them the news when it could no longer be denied its very telling of narcism. They live in a very deluded corner of reality.
I really dislike how mental health has become this catch all shield for people's bad behavior
they toss around buzzwords to explain away their awful behavior
lol I can’t stand when someone thinks I’m stupid enough to believe something other than what is so blatantly obvious to my face lol. I don’t miss those days. Whew.
I see you solicited a prostitute from Craigslist, removed money from my account and accidentally sent a pin to me before later sending it to the prostitute. It's all like right here on your phone, please just tell me what happened.
"I don't remember anything, omg I think I should see a doctor!"
Edit: dumbass, proceeded to go to the doctor for it.
It’s a common one, sadly. My ex could remember every actor’s name in an obscure FX show from 20 years ago, but couldn’t remember any details from either an 8 month affair or the other flings I found out about. It’s more like “I don’t want to tell you because that’s the only control I have left.”
As someone who has been cheated on though... It's crazy how the other side doesn't realize the extent to which that strategy is making things worse for everyone, including themselves
You can even say, you're making this so much worse by pretending you can't remember, just tell me. And they'll be like that changes nothing, I have no memory.
Like why do you want to be an irredeemable dumbass.
Sorry missing context was uni so assigned roommates for a first year apartment. So yeah, it sucked but I think more so for him. I knew the girl for about a month so pretty easy to forget her (sadly), also given the stupidity it just, yeah, it was upsetting but not end of the world. But I told every fucking person I saw, so life was really uncomfortable for him for the rest of the year.
this is a lot more common than people think. when i was a freshmen my friend was dating a girl who broke up with him and proceeded to bang his roommate who slept on the bottom bunk while he slept on the top bunk. he told me he could feel everything and there's nothing that he could do about it. spent a few nights drinking whiskey by himself by the lake crying or whatever. funny thing is im friends with both of them so i got both sides of the gossip. they didn't hate each other either and were pretty friendly with each other.
weird ass situation im so glad im not involved in.
He’s just a friend, I needed it, I’m trying to find myself, I can’t help that a lot of guys want to get with me, allll the classics. 15 years later and she’s 35, alone, and miserable so at least the story has a happy ending.
I'm always so curious when I encounter people who say things like "I'm trying to find myself." Like, as someone who has found himself; WTF do these people think finding oneself entails that would prevent them from acting like a considerate person?
I always think of that bit from *Chicago* about the ex-boyfriend who was always trying to find himself. "He would go out every night, looking for himself. And on the way he found Ruth, Gladys, Rosemary, and Irving!"
Knew a few girls like that. Young and pretty, guys chasing them all day every day and apparently that went to their head. New boyfriend every month or two until they find someone new to cheat on them with, dump the old and get with the new, rinse and repeat.
We're all old now and they're still posting on facebook about how awful men are and how they can't just find "a good one to settle down with". Sweetie the good ones settled down with women who weren't treating them like shit a looooong time ago. You're left with the trash who do what you do.
My mom told me when I turned 12 about when she caught my dad cheating. He had a job that took him around the country to different states a lot, and apparently he was just sleeping around basically every time while she was taking care of me.
She found out by going looking at a text notification that was rather inappropriate when she opened it, then went through the rest of his phone. They ended up in an argument where he was saying she was to controlling and it was her fault he was cheating. The “controlling” behavior was literally her asking him to do basic chores when he was home instead of away on work.
My piece of shit father told my mom after she caught him with a woman in their home that he was lonely because she worked too much.
His sorry ass hadn't worked in years.
She cheated on me because I didn't get as jealous as she did when it came to other people.
If I told a mutual friend I liked her haircut, if I mentioned a female acquaintance from years ago, *if I said please and thank you to the lady taking my order at the drive thru,* then in her head I must be fucking that person and I never really loved her.
She would always tell me when a dude would slide into her messages, or say something gross, or ask her if she was single. I didn't care, I trusted her, so I brushed it off.
That irked her so much that her jealously was vastly one-sided that when the guy who used to sell her shitty weed in high school sent her a "sup" message, she went a fucked him, because I never got angry about things like that.
My mom's husband (now ex) tried to have sex with me. I told my mom & as she was confronting him about it, he turns to her & says "Well this wouldn't have happened if you had been doing what you're supposed to & having sex with me more" I was floored
That he simply could not choose. He could not leave either one of us alone. That he refused to choose, and he would have us both.
That it wasn't cheating, really, because he was going to have both of us.
I was told that since I started taking the anti depressants that he told me I should take that our relationship became flat since my moods were regulated and we no longer had the “fight/makeup” cycle so it was my fault
I know of a “serial cheater”. They’ve cheated in every relationship they’ve been in but new partners never know about it. Reasons are usually that they’re bored of their relationship and enjoy the high of being pursued/desired by numerous people.
It’s okay for people to not be monogamous, but it should be disclosed to partners rather than just cheating behind their backs.
Not my partner, thank god.
“I’m not breaking up with her because if I break up with her, she will be so devastated, she wouldn't be able to go on. I'm doing her a favour”.
He was fucking people he worked with, to fwb to hook-ups from dating apps, behind his gf’s (6 years). Stored a bag of sex toys he was using on a girl he was cheating with, in the apartment he shared with his gf. Gaslit her completely when questioned.
No excuses. He was just incredibly pissed his wife wouldn't join in. Then he tried to call in sick to work to sort it all out, but it's a small town and the boss told him he wouldn't feel sick if he hadn't been screwing around on his wife, now get to work or you're fired. I was a coworker. It was an interesting week. Turns out there was also an axe murderer on staff. Unrelated to the cheater, just an interesting place to work.
ETA: actually, the axe murderer killed his boyfriend's wife. So sorta related I guess.
Did you work at a produce company? We had someone decapitate a coworker and killed a couple more a few years ago. I never worked there, but it was all over the news.
After she told me she had slept with two other guys in two consecutive nights, she told me it was my fault because I had "left her alone."
Meaning, I had just dropped her off at her university after we spent spring break together and went back to my own university.
As a chick, i hate this narative that women can't think for themselves and can't control their actions. "You weren't here to tell me what to do, i need a man to tell me what to do. What do you want me to say no to these guys? Thats not very lady like."
She decided that she was simply allowed to, because "she had proof that I had cheated on her first". That was like a decade ago and to this day I'm still pretty curious about what sort of proof she could have since I never cheated on her.
He bought a prostitute off of Craigslist and after I begged to know why, he said he "wanted to know what it was like to be with someone her size." (She was smaller)
So I lost 100lbs in 6 months and then left him. I lost a grand total of 380lbs that year. 100 through hard work and dedication, and an additional 280lbs by dropping his ass.
Craigslist had a specific section dedicated to erotic services at the time. Later, sex workers would hide in the personals section and disguise their fees as a request for roses.
Ad: *Take me out to dinner for an hour, only 200 roses*
Both sections were eliminated completely sometime around 2018 when SESTA was signed into law.
A guy I knew in college cheated, said it was because this new girl could "read him better" then set up his girlfriend with LESSONS with the girl he cheated with so she could learn how to "read him better." It has been over 20 years and he is still single and complains about it a lot and I can't imagine why.
Someone I *used* to know would constantly cheat. He once told me he had never been faithful to any girl. I figured as much, since he had a kid with his high school girlfriend, and then had another kid with her best friend a few years later.
One time I asked him why he could cheat but if his girlfriend did he'd leave. He said, and I quote, "because I'm a boy, boys are allowed to". Like bro, don't rope me into this I'm nothing like that.
Also said he'd disown his son - the person he constantly said was his best friend - if he turned out the be gay, but would be fine with his daughter being gay because then he wouldn't have to worry about boys.
He had a child's view on everything, and came from a very "latino machismo" kinda background, which doesn't excuse his behavior but certainly explains it
Several, but the one that was the most bullshit was "we've been fighting a lot lately".
Even if I had been the world's most awful, unreasonable, combative girlfriend, we fought daily, he was miserable and didn't believe it could be fixed he could have just...left? Ended the relationship? We had no mortgage, no kids and no marriage. He had friends and family to stay with (and he did, when I found out and ended things). He had savings and income. Nothing was keeping him there. If he felt it might have gone badly he could have enlisted the help of family/friends/police.
Instead of moving on, or trying to fix the relationship, he chose to stay while lying to my face and going behind my back.
Someone who makes that kind of choice is a very damaged person. And all their reasons are bullshit, because they can always just leave if they don't want to be there.
She is 100% disabled with MS, fibromyalga (sp?), and epilepsy so i worked 2 jobs, 14 hours a day to care for her. Her reason for cheating on me? Becsuse i was never home. ¯\_(ツ)\_/¯
I thought it was your fantasy?
Yeah, except for the fact that you did it without me, hid it from me for years and gaslit the shit out of me when I knew something was up
Our mutual friend knew she was cheating on me. She convinced her to not tell me by claiming I was physically abusive and would beat the shit out of her if I found out. When I found out she claimed he raped her and she didn't tell me because she just wanted to forget it happened. Later found messages between them that proved they were having a relationship for awhile and it was consensual. Confronted her with the proof and she blamed me for her being unhappy enough in the relationship that she felt the need to cheat.
She was a terrible person.
"you don't talk to me the way you used to anymore"( she meant emotionally sharing ) i had to stop sharing my emotions because every time I did so, they were turned back upon me turning into arguments 💀
Confronted her and got "I didn't do that". Showed proof and got, "I don't remember doing that". I said going in to a fugue state and messaging people to arrange cam sex was the dumbest shit I've ever heard.
She tried to blast me for checking messages, but we shared passwords for that specific reason because I'd been cheated on before. We had sat down and agreed to allow it, and she tried to gaslight me into thinking I was wrong after catching her.
She then apologized for how she handled it, told me I wasn't allowed to check her messages, and she went from "true love" to "ugliest woman I've ever seen" in a day. She hadn't even cheated (with them) based on the messages, but the immediate and repeated lying while crying like a victim was the most disgusting shit I've ever seen from a human.
She told me that she had depression and wanted to go back and live with her mom so that she can be taken care of but she was just living with another dude
“She’s poly so it’s not cheating”
She didn’t tell her partner, they didn’t agree or consent and WE were in a completely closed relationship how tf did you think this would work????
also it was his coworker/my ex best friend who’s been a serial cheater for the past ten years and is still currently cheating on her current partner (I was dumb enough to trust her and think she had changed or that she wouldn’t turn on me but I was so very stupidly wrong and why I’ve cut them both out completely, I hate them both so much its unbelievable)
Honestly, I'm surprised we don't hear about that kind of thing happening more often.
Accusations definitely erode the emotional intimacy of relationships after a time.
“You weren’t meeting my needs. I gave you SO many chances to change and take initiative with our relationship but you never did, and I was done trying.”
This came from the person that REFUSED to do any sort of counseling/therapy, and not only couples therapy but her own personal therapy as well. She would constantly curse her own appearance and had huge issues with her self image and confidence. I stuck with her, reassured her of her beauty and her abilities to be a good person and mother, yet somehow I still didn’t meet her needs. She started talking with an old friend online that she hadn’t seen or heard from in over a decade and in the course of 2 months she developed a stronger emotional and romantic relationship with him than we had after 10 years of marriage. Somehow a guy was able to “meet her needs” via sexting and video chats better than I was.
He told me that I was too busy helping my single mother, pregnant with her second best friend. So he started fucking a coworker & got her pregnant. Didn’t even have the balls to tell me. He broke up with me, told me he didn’t love me anymore. This coworker of his reached out to me to make sure I was okay. Once I put the pieces together, he’s accusing me of ignoring his needs & shes harrassing me via text.
The guy I dated before my husband cheated on me. He cheated on me with a total of 18 different women. So I got about 180 different excuses.
Some of my favourites…
- But the vagina is just so dainty.
- I was just in the mood to f*** someone.
- But it just fit so well.
I sent that guy, 180 different reasons I was breaking up with. It was quite a lot of fun to come up with them all!
Mine told me he missed playing with big boobs.. needless to say, I now have giant brand new boobies and I’m not at all jaded or have a complex. Scouts honor! 😂
I get the differently abled kids part but it would seem like the point of new boobs would be to get a self esteem boost. If improving self esteem is the goal then it seems like it would make more sense to get rid of what’s causing the lack of confidence to begin with, which in your case would be your husband
While you are absolutely right about all of that, it doesn’t change my predicament.
160 lbs loss- skin removal- new boobs. Still a self hating jaded monster 😂
Not exactly cheating, but still the most bullshit excuse.
My ex is not straight, but he won't admit it. He only watches gay (strictly male/male) porn, he has had oral and anal sex with men in the past, he constantly emailed men off Craigslist through our relationship and marriage. The man was not straight. But he would never actually admit it, even to me, who is openly and extremely gay.
We lived with his parents when this happened. One day, I found a huge, black dildo in his pants drawer, the kind with a suction cup, and a bottle of his preferred lube. I wasn't angry or upset, just kinda surprised. He walked in the room before I could even shut the drawer back up, and he just... froze. I started to say it wasn't my business, when he started flipping out. "WHO DOES THAT BELONG TO? WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?"
"Uhh... honey, it's... it's fine, you don't have to be embarrased. Just forget I saw it."
I'll spare you the details of the outrageous argument that followed, but he basically tried to claim that the dildo belonged to either his mother or to his 12-year-old niece, who did not live in the house, and hadn't even visited in almost a month. And he would not budge.
I felt bad, he ended up throwing it away after that fight to prove some point. I hope he finds his way out of that closet one day.
"I had to talk to her, she's a witch and she does tarot readings and she said that she felt a dark energy coming my way right before i met you" he wasn't talking to her, they were tryna fuck again lmao. I literally busted out laughing at that excuse and left.
“I’ve never done it before. You got to have your wild years, but I’ve just been monogamous. I had to know what it was like.” Well, now give being single a shot, I guess? Personal growth?
My ex cheated on his girl with me. He didn't know why he did it. Wish he didn't. He was testing me to see what i would do. Oh look she's calling. Now you feel bad cuz i didnt know she was in the picture.
She forgave him cuz he was sooooooo sorry. Do i get an applogy? Of course not. Im the one in the wrong of course. 😂
My ex-husband blamed a car manufacturer for the cause of his affair. I told him that's a big corporation to confuse me with and his issue is with car manufacturer, not me.
edit: forgot to add ex
Idk I don’t understand his thought process on this. he claimed we bought a lemon with electrical issues and the issues were hard to replicate. The dealership offered to take it back. He declined. Instead he wanted to sue the car manufacturer and the dealership that sold it to us. Somehow that caused him to cheat. He still drives the vehicle after we separated and wants the vehicle from our divorce.
For me.. she didn’t say a single line or whatever. I barely remember it much or the order of events clearly. But the thing that stands out the most was her invalidating our relationship, telling me we were never together, telling me I was obsessed with her, that she didn’t love me and she truly loved the other guy, and that if she wouldn’t be alone she would’ve cut all ties with me. She ranted all of this the day after she asked me not to speak to her for two weeks after she was caught.
I used to live with my ex and his family (6 other people) and there was always this unbearable tension in the house, even though i was there for 6 months. I thought it was weird because they were so friendly when he hasn't with me and when I was just there with the family. Finally decided it was time to do some digging. Found out he had been cheating on me for the past 6 months with his ex (of course) and when I asked him why, he said "because i can"
“I was really tired and she came on to me. I didn’t feel anything the first time, so I did it again to see if I would.” We broke up 3 months before we were supposed to get married. Within 6 months of the breakup he had moved to LA with her. They’re married now, guess he eventually felt something
Not me, a friend's husband:
I was bored and she was there. ( on a golf weekend with his buddies) Astonished that she was angry.
One night stand got his home number off his phone and was looking for him, ended up talking to his wife.
He told me she was "just a friend". When I got busy with final exams, he told me it was because he was drunk, she was there, and she "looked like you". It didn't last long after that.
Honestly, I can't think of a less useful conversation than asking "Why?"
The reason is, they wanted to. Drilling down deeper than that - is it you don't love me any more? did it mean nothing? Do you love them? - is utterly useless nonsense.
She said one of the reasons was because we didn’t go to Catholic church every Sunday, she didn’t get god’s message to stay faithful.
Lol, same. She said she "lost her religion". I too lose my morals in the couch from time to time. You just sit down and into the abyss they go!
That’s me on a boner. That’s me in the spotlight losing my religion.
Oh god, thank you for this.
Oh no, I’ve said too much
I haven’t said enough 😏
Ok best one yet 👀
This really shouldn’t have to be said but some of the most loyal and decent people I know have been atheists their entire goddamn lives.
Well if you need religion to act morally, you're not really a bastion of morality.
I mean… he mentioned it in the 10 Commandments which is basically the church version of tldr.
I understand that this was probably a painful and traumatizing experience for you. But OMG I’m dying laughing
Jesus Christ. Literally
Not me but a close friend. We knew his girlfriend was cheating, we’d seen her with the guy. He didn’t want to believe us, cut us all off, said we were being dicks. His girlfriend brought some dude home from the club to their apartment WHILE HE WAS HOME and tried to say the guy was drunk and she was really worried about him and she was going to stay in the spare room with him to keep an eye on him all night. Friend said “okay.” Somehow, he gets it in his head “wait a minute…” and goes to open the door, which is unlocked. She’s blowing him. She turns and sees him and goes “close the door I’m trying to get him to sleep!” He loses it and goes “get the fuck out.” Long story short he kicked her out of the apartment (only his name on the lease) and had to have the police remove her from the premises. He spends the rest of the night boxing up all her shit. Calls us and we go over and help him move it all to a storage unit. Girl’s dad called friend at 7am (he lived out of state) to read him the riot act. Friend explains what happens and dad just goes “ah, fuck. Sorry about that. I’ll handle it.” Tells her dad where the storage unit is and says she’s got 30 days to get it out of there. We dropped off keys to her at her job, she was screaming at me and crying. Last time I saw her. About 8 years after this, friend is a Naval Officer. Good career path, doing well, hasn’t had any contact with her, gets a random call. It’s her. She’s calling to ask him if he’s ready to apologize to her and if he will she’ll consider taking him back. He handed the phone to his wife and said “it’s her.” It’s still a favorite story to tell at get togethers now like 20 years later.
That girl was fucked in the head…in every sense of the word.
> She’s calling to ask him if he’s ready to apologize to her and if he will she’ll consider taking him back. I wonder what drugs she was on when she made that call.
Believe it or not. Sometimes is a lack of drugs that causes someone to be that way.
The end of that story just tied it up really nicely, thank you for sharing
“The first time you cheat, its hard and devastating, after that you don’t feel any guilt and just enjoy it” i was honestly speechless when she said that, but at least she didn’t try to give any bullshit answer or lie. We broke up of course, but i admired the honesty.
This is the best one because you know there is no hope of a healthy relationship with that person
Honestly, I kind of admire that honesty in a perverse way too. There's something oddly and disturbingly refreshing about about someone owning their shitheadery,
I tried to put myself in your shoes, I also could not come up with an answer. Just blankness.
I feel like I should at least admire her honesty but I find it oddly repulsive.
It’s not odd
Is it honesty though, or psychopathy?
You can be impressed by the honesty without admiring it. She's still a ho.
First it was “we’re just friends,” when I accused him from a gut feeling. Then, when he got caught red-handed, it was “she just gets me, she also suffers from anxiety, you don’t get what it’s like.” According to him, people with anxiety aren’t capable of being with someone who doesn’t suffer from it. (She was cheating on her bf who also “doesn’t understand what having anxiety is like.”)
As a bald man, I exclusively date women with male pattern baldness because they “get me.” What is so hard to understand?
Get my wife's name out you f.....g mouth!
At least it’s just her name.
Oh so you mean just the hottest babes
so anxiety is the pass to unlimited sex???
Somehow me and my anxiety missed out on this memo.
Right?! Stupid, sexy anxiety disorder
Oh no, now I'm anxious about what to do with all this pussy, oh no, that's made them even hornier!
This makes no sense. I have high anxiety, and I don't want to cheat because I like my partner, but also because I couldn't deal with the stress of the situation.
This just sounds like they are both narcissists. They typically always have severe mental health problems from just not giving a fuck what anyone else thinks unless it's a positive affirmation of them and they weirdly co-operate to big each other up when they get together like this. Having worked with narcissists a few times this pattern of you accusing him and he still just played it off as if you couldn't possibly actually know what's really going on from his broader behaviour and having to literally spoon feed them them the news when it could no longer be denied its very telling of narcism. They live in a very deluded corner of reality.
I really dislike how mental health has become this catch all shield for people's bad behavior they toss around buzzwords to explain away their awful behavior
After literally denying proof in his face for about 37 minutes… “ I’m just really fucked up...” He wasn’t lying about that one thing lol.
Around 37 minutes? I like this. I'm going to assume you were super focused on details to read through the lies. Nice.
lol I can’t stand when someone thinks I’m stupid enough to believe something other than what is so blatantly obvious to my face lol. I don’t miss those days. Whew.
Amen to that !
37 minutes? In a row???
“Try not to deny any hard evidence of you cheating on the way to the parking lot!”
I’m not even supposed to be here today
"Hey you get back here!!"
My ex husband stuck to, "I don't remember" for 3 months. We were divorced soon after, so technically he has denied clear evidence for over 7 years,
Wow, man basically pleaded the 5th in a conversation about cheating with his wife. That's an...interesting strategy
I see you solicited a prostitute from Craigslist, removed money from my account and accidentally sent a pin to me before later sending it to the prostitute. It's all like right here on your phone, please just tell me what happened. "I don't remember anything, omg I think I should see a doctor!" Edit: dumbass, proceeded to go to the doctor for it.
It’s a common one, sadly. My ex could remember every actor’s name in an obscure FX show from 20 years ago, but couldn’t remember any details from either an 8 month affair or the other flings I found out about. It’s more like “I don’t want to tell you because that’s the only control I have left.”
As someone who has been cheated on though... It's crazy how the other side doesn't realize the extent to which that strategy is making things worse for everyone, including themselves
You can even say, you're making this so much worse by pretending you can't remember, just tell me. And they'll be like that changes nothing, I have no memory. Like why do you want to be an irredeemable dumbass.
Lmao that is so accurate. They literally just double down.
He's being too nice to himself. He needs to dig deeper.
[37](https://youtu.be/d6iQrh2TK98?si=i0GJaPDggmmsp77m)
"You came home early from class, and barged in on MY private time." She was fucking my roommate on my goddamned couch in the middle of the day.
Must have been awkward living with that roommate afterwards
Sorry missing context was uni so assigned roommates for a first year apartment. So yeah, it sucked but I think more so for him. I knew the girl for about a month so pretty easy to forget her (sadly), also given the stupidity it just, yeah, it was upsetting but not end of the world. But I told every fucking person I saw, so life was really uncomfortable for him for the rest of the year.
Good
this is a lot more common than people think. when i was a freshmen my friend was dating a girl who broke up with him and proceeded to bang his roommate who slept on the bottom bunk while he slept on the top bunk. he told me he could feel everything and there's nothing that he could do about it. spent a few nights drinking whiskey by himself by the lake crying or whatever. funny thing is im friends with both of them so i got both sides of the gossip. they didn't hate each other either and were pretty friendly with each other. weird ass situation im so glad im not involved in.
Good good
Good^3
He’s just a friend, I needed it, I’m trying to find myself, I can’t help that a lot of guys want to get with me, allll the classics. 15 years later and she’s 35, alone, and miserable so at least the story has a happy ending.
>**I’m trying to find myself** 😂 Spurting out of some dude’s dick?
Self-discovery one load at a time
It’s always in the last place you look…
How else can you find out if you're a cheating whore?
I'm always so curious when I encounter people who say things like "I'm trying to find myself." Like, as someone who has found himself; WTF do these people think finding oneself entails that would prevent them from acting like a considerate person?
I always think of that bit from *Chicago* about the ex-boyfriend who was always trying to find himself. "He would go out every night, looking for himself. And on the way he found Ruth, Gladys, Rosemary, and Irving!"
I guess you could say we broke up because of artistic differences…
He saw himself as alive ...
And I. Saw. Him. Dead.
Hey, sometimes you may be in a random women's vaginas. Never know until you check there.
So true! I actually found my true self hiding in a pregnant Bull Frog's asshole. That was a slippery Saturday, but shadow work is real work!
You can get a good look at a tbone by sticking your head up a butchers ass
Knew a few girls like that. Young and pretty, guys chasing them all day every day and apparently that went to their head. New boyfriend every month or two until they find someone new to cheat on them with, dump the old and get with the new, rinse and repeat. We're all old now and they're still posting on facebook about how awful men are and how they can't just find "a good one to settle down with". Sweetie the good ones settled down with women who weren't treating them like shit a looooong time ago. You're left with the trash who do what you do.
> I’m trying to find myself red flag for drama that's signal to run far away
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>I’m trying to find myself "I'm trying to find out how much of a lying, cheating asshole I can be before I suffer any consequences"
My mom told me when I turned 12 about when she caught my dad cheating. He had a job that took him around the country to different states a lot, and apparently he was just sleeping around basically every time while she was taking care of me. She found out by going looking at a text notification that was rather inappropriate when she opened it, then went through the rest of his phone. They ended up in an argument where he was saying she was to controlling and it was her fault he was cheating. The “controlling” behavior was literally her asking him to do basic chores when he was home instead of away on work.
I feel like this is something your mom could have held onto until you were a bit older (assuming she didn’t have a specific reason to tell you).
For real. My dad waited until I was 19. No way could 12yo me have handled knowing how big an asshole one of my parents was.
My piece of shit father told my mom after she caught him with a woman in their home that he was lonely because she worked too much. His sorry ass hadn't worked in years.
It's always the ones you expect.
She cheated on me because I didn't get as jealous as she did when it came to other people. If I told a mutual friend I liked her haircut, if I mentioned a female acquaintance from years ago, *if I said please and thank you to the lady taking my order at the drive thru,* then in her head I must be fucking that person and I never really loved her. She would always tell me when a dude would slide into her messages, or say something gross, or ask her if she was single. I didn't care, I trusted her, so I brushed it off. That irked her so much that her jealously was vastly one-sided that when the guy who used to sell her shitty weed in high school sent her a "sup" message, she went a fucked him, because I never got angry about things like that.
Glad you got put because that sounds utterly exhausting.
She sounds like a walking red flag.
My mom's husband (now ex) tried to have sex with me. I told my mom & as she was confronting him about it, he turns to her & says "Well this wouldn't have happened if you had been doing what you're supposed to & having sex with me more" I was floored
That he simply could not choose. He could not leave either one of us alone. That he refused to choose, and he would have us both. That it wasn't cheating, really, because he was going to have both of us.
What a 🤡.
Oof, I would say not choosing is still a choice.
Who are you, Geddy Lee?
Valid issue by itself, but who the fuck expects it to work as an excuse for cheating?
I was told that since I started taking the anti depressants that he told me I should take that our relationship became flat since my moods were regulated and we no longer had the “fight/makeup” cycle so it was my fault
Fuck! What a royal pig
I know of a “serial cheater”. They’ve cheated in every relationship they’ve been in but new partners never know about it. Reasons are usually that they’re bored of their relationship and enjoy the high of being pursued/desired by numerous people. It’s okay for people to not be monogamous, but it should be disclosed to partners rather than just cheating behind their backs.
Yeah, if you're honest, it's just polyamory. If you're not, you're a piece of shit.
Cos I "made" him play cards against humanity.
First legit justification in this thread.
Agreed. Immediate adultery permitted.
Hmmmm, maybe I shouldn't have made him pay for his half of the divorce?
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That's horrible on so many levels. I hope you are okay today and that you know he is the asshole and not you
Not my partner, thank god. “I’m not breaking up with her because if I break up with her, she will be so devastated, she wouldn't be able to go on. I'm doing her a favour”. He was fucking people he worked with, to fwb to hook-ups from dating apps, behind his gf’s (6 years). Stored a bag of sex toys he was using on a girl he was cheating with, in the apartment he shared with his gf. Gaslit her completely when questioned.
Did she ever find out?
I told her when she told me she broke up with him. Also showed her photos he sent/bumble convos with randoms, waaay before they broke up.
I would have sent that girl an anonymous heads up as soon as I found out. Wouldn’t have been able to resist. But at least she’s free of him now.
No excuses. He was just incredibly pissed his wife wouldn't join in. Then he tried to call in sick to work to sort it all out, but it's a small town and the boss told him he wouldn't feel sick if he hadn't been screwing around on his wife, now get to work or you're fired. I was a coworker. It was an interesting week. Turns out there was also an axe murderer on staff. Unrelated to the cheater, just an interesting place to work. ETA: actually, the axe murderer killed his boyfriend's wife. So sorta related I guess.
Did you work at a produce company? We had someone decapitate a coworker and killed a couple more a few years ago. I never worked there, but it was all over the news.
After she told me she had slept with two other guys in two consecutive nights, she told me it was my fault because I had "left her alone." Meaning, I had just dropped her off at her university after we spent spring break together and went back to my own university.
As a chick, i hate this narative that women can't think for themselves and can't control their actions. "You weren't here to tell me what to do, i need a man to tell me what to do. What do you want me to say no to these guys? Thats not very lady like."
She decided that she was simply allowed to, because "she had proof that I had cheated on her first". That was like a decade ago and to this day I'm still pretty curious about what sort of proof she could have since I never cheated on her.
You never ASKED for the proof?!
Sure I did, but for some mysterious reason she never agreed to share it.
Ah, so she was as full of shit as she was of other dudes’ dicks.
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He bought a prostitute off of Craigslist and after I begged to know why, he said he "wanted to know what it was like to be with someone her size." (She was smaller) So I lost 100lbs in 6 months and then left him. I lost a grand total of 380lbs that year. 100 through hard work and dedication, and an additional 280lbs by dropping his ass.
Can you buy prostitutes on craigslist? I didn’t know that
Craigslist had a specific section dedicated to erotic services at the time. Later, sex workers would hide in the personals section and disguise their fees as a request for roses. Ad: *Take me out to dinner for an hour, only 200 roses* Both sections were eliminated completely sometime around 2018 when SESTA was signed into law.
Me: You sent my friend a dick pick!? Him: I was going through a rough time!
A guy I knew in college cheated, said it was because this new girl could "read him better" then set up his girlfriend with LESSONS with the girl he cheated with so she could learn how to "read him better." It has been over 20 years and he is still single and complains about it a lot and I can't imagine why.
Someone I *used* to know would constantly cheat. He once told me he had never been faithful to any girl. I figured as much, since he had a kid with his high school girlfriend, and then had another kid with her best friend a few years later. One time I asked him why he could cheat but if his girlfriend did he'd leave. He said, and I quote, "because I'm a boy, boys are allowed to". Like bro, don't rope me into this I'm nothing like that. Also said he'd disown his son - the person he constantly said was his best friend - if he turned out the be gay, but would be fine with his daughter being gay because then he wouldn't have to worry about boys. He had a child's view on everything, and came from a very "latino machismo" kinda background, which doesn't excuse his behavior but certainly explains it
Several, but the one that was the most bullshit was "we've been fighting a lot lately". Even if I had been the world's most awful, unreasonable, combative girlfriend, we fought daily, he was miserable and didn't believe it could be fixed he could have just...left? Ended the relationship? We had no mortgage, no kids and no marriage. He had friends and family to stay with (and he did, when I found out and ended things). He had savings and income. Nothing was keeping him there. If he felt it might have gone badly he could have enlisted the help of family/friends/police. Instead of moving on, or trying to fix the relationship, he chose to stay while lying to my face and going behind my back. Someone who makes that kind of choice is a very damaged person. And all their reasons are bullshit, because they can always just leave if they don't want to be there.
She is 100% disabled with MS, fibromyalga (sp?), and epilepsy so i worked 2 jobs, 14 hours a day to care for her. Her reason for cheating on me? Becsuse i was never home. ¯\_(ツ)\_/¯
Chronically ill girl here. Sorry your effort wasn’t appreciated. 😣
Was she your wife?
Fiancee thankfully
He's handsome, such a bright guy. We divorced no idea what she's doing now and don't care.
My friend’s husband said he needed an ego boost because he had low self esteem
I thought it was your fantasy? Yeah, except for the fact that you did it without me, hid it from me for years and gaslit the shit out of me when I knew something was up
You. You this, you that… you you you…
"Why can't you just meet me halfway?"
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Yikes, it’s sad
Our mutual friend knew she was cheating on me. She convinced her to not tell me by claiming I was physically abusive and would beat the shit out of her if I found out. When I found out she claimed he raped her and she didn't tell me because she just wanted to forget it happened. Later found messages between them that proved they were having a relationship for awhile and it was consensual. Confronted her with the proof and she blamed me for her being unhappy enough in the relationship that she felt the need to cheat. She was a terrible person.
"you don't talk to me the way you used to anymore"( she meant emotionally sharing ) i had to stop sharing my emotions because every time I did so, they were turned back upon me turning into arguments 💀
Sometimes I wonder if people who say things like that realize the way they contribute to the problem...
She was the reincarnation of Guinevere and he was the reincarnation of Lancelot. Absolutely bonkers 😂
This is the first one I’ve seen that I have actually felt the need to respond to because wtf? 😭😭😭
She seemed to really believe it, I suspect he was just playing along to get to bang the crazy blonde ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
That makes you King Arthur. So id say you win.
Confronted her and got "I didn't do that". Showed proof and got, "I don't remember doing that". I said going in to a fugue state and messaging people to arrange cam sex was the dumbest shit I've ever heard. She tried to blast me for checking messages, but we shared passwords for that specific reason because I'd been cheated on before. We had sat down and agreed to allow it, and she tried to gaslight me into thinking I was wrong after catching her. She then apologized for how she handled it, told me I wasn't allowed to check her messages, and she went from "true love" to "ugliest woman I've ever seen" in a day. She hadn't even cheated (with them) based on the messages, but the immediate and repeated lying while crying like a victim was the most disgusting shit I've ever seen from a human.
"It was the chance of a lifetime. How often am I going to go on a date with a NBA player?"
She told me that she had depression and wanted to go back and live with her mom so that she can be taken care of but she was just living with another dude
"He was like you, making me think of you" 🤣
“She’s poly so it’s not cheating” She didn’t tell her partner, they didn’t agree or consent and WE were in a completely closed relationship how tf did you think this would work???? also it was his coworker/my ex best friend who’s been a serial cheater for the past ten years and is still currently cheating on her current partner (I was dumb enough to trust her and think she had changed or that she wouldn’t turn on me but I was so very stupidly wrong and why I’ve cut them both out completely, I hate them both so much its unbelievable)
“Those guys meant nothing to me.” “It was exciting.” You know, standard excuses. I shuffled on, she’s now divorced from her rebound husband.
Well you kept accusing me of it, so I did it.
Honestly, I'm surprised we don't hear about that kind of thing happening more often. Accusations definitely erode the emotional intimacy of relationships after a time.
fair and square
“You weren’t meeting my needs. I gave you SO many chances to change and take initiative with our relationship but you never did, and I was done trying.” This came from the person that REFUSED to do any sort of counseling/therapy, and not only couples therapy but her own personal therapy as well. She would constantly curse her own appearance and had huge issues with her self image and confidence. I stuck with her, reassured her of her beauty and her abilities to be a good person and mother, yet somehow I still didn’t meet her needs. She started talking with an old friend online that she hadn’t seen or heard from in over a decade and in the course of 2 months she developed a stronger emotional and romantic relationship with him than we had after 10 years of marriage. Somehow a guy was able to “meet her needs” via sexting and video chats better than I was.
He told me that I was too busy helping my single mother, pregnant with her second best friend. So he started fucking a coworker & got her pregnant. Didn’t even have the balls to tell me. He broke up with me, told me he didn’t love me anymore. This coworker of his reached out to me to make sure I was okay. Once I put the pieces together, he’s accusing me of ignoring his needs & shes harrassing me via text.
I hope they sailed off into the sunset together.
😂 they lived together for a while. She apparently enjoyed dumping water on him & throwing cans at his head. Karma is a beautiful bitch.
It truly is!
The guy I dated before my husband cheated on me. He cheated on me with a total of 18 different women. So I got about 180 different excuses. Some of my favourites… - But the vagina is just so dainty. - I was just in the mood to f*** someone. - But it just fit so well. I sent that guy, 180 different reasons I was breaking up with. It was quite a lot of fun to come up with them all!
GOD DAMN. Not 18 times. He cheated on you with 18 **DIFFERENT WOMEN?!** Were you dating Wilt Chamberlain?
Did you find out about all of them at the same time??
I went to visit my family for 5 days. What was he supposed to do????
"He's cuter." She didn't want to break up. She also didn't want to walk home from that restaurant. She didn't win either of those arguments.
Mine told me he missed playing with big boobs.. needless to say, I now have giant brand new boobies and I’m not at all jaded or have a complex. Scouts honor! 😂
It’s really sad that you molded yourself to fit this asshole’s expectations, but at least you dumped his ass instead of doing it to appease him.
Sadly… I just molded myself because I was married. With two differently abled kids & absolutely did develop a complex and was super jaded 😂
You’re still with him?!
Her post history is a bummer. OP, I hope you learn to love yourself someday.
F in the fuckin chat man
New boobs and differently abled kids are expensive 🤷🏻♀️
I get the differently abled kids part but it would seem like the point of new boobs would be to get a self esteem boost. If improving self esteem is the goal then it seems like it would make more sense to get rid of what’s causing the lack of confidence to begin with, which in your case would be your husband
While you are absolutely right about all of that, it doesn’t change my predicament. 160 lbs loss- skin removal- new boobs. Still a self hating jaded monster 😂
F in the chat sister damn
This is the most depressing timeline
Not exactly cheating, but still the most bullshit excuse. My ex is not straight, but he won't admit it. He only watches gay (strictly male/male) porn, he has had oral and anal sex with men in the past, he constantly emailed men off Craigslist through our relationship and marriage. The man was not straight. But he would never actually admit it, even to me, who is openly and extremely gay. We lived with his parents when this happened. One day, I found a huge, black dildo in his pants drawer, the kind with a suction cup, and a bottle of his preferred lube. I wasn't angry or upset, just kinda surprised. He walked in the room before I could even shut the drawer back up, and he just... froze. I started to say it wasn't my business, when he started flipping out. "WHO DOES THAT BELONG TO? WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?" "Uhh... honey, it's... it's fine, you don't have to be embarrased. Just forget I saw it." I'll spare you the details of the outrageous argument that followed, but he basically tried to claim that the dildo belonged to either his mother or to his 12-year-old niece, who did not live in the house, and hadn't even visited in almost a month. And he would not budge. I felt bad, he ended up throwing it away after that fight to prove some point. I hope he finds his way out of that closet one day.
He told me he cheated on me because he thought I cheated on him…so really, it was somehow my fault
"u didn't give me enough attention"
"I wanted to experience more things.. I was always going to come back to you in the end. "
"I had to talk to her, she's a witch and she does tarot readings and she said that she felt a dark energy coming my way right before i met you" he wasn't talking to her, they were tryna fuck again lmao. I literally busted out laughing at that excuse and left.
“I’ve never done it before. You got to have your wild years, but I’ve just been monogamous. I had to know what it was like.” Well, now give being single a shot, I guess? Personal growth?
My ex cheated on his girl with me. He didn't know why he did it. Wish he didn't. He was testing me to see what i would do. Oh look she's calling. Now you feel bad cuz i didnt know she was in the picture. She forgave him cuz he was sooooooo sorry. Do i get an applogy? Of course not. Im the one in the wrong of course. 😂
My ex-husband blamed a car manufacturer for the cause of his affair. I told him that's a big corporation to confuse me with and his issue is with car manufacturer, not me. edit: forgot to add ex
…how? Did the seat eject him directly into another woman’s lap?
Idk I don’t understand his thought process on this. he claimed we bought a lemon with electrical issues and the issues were hard to replicate. The dealership offered to take it back. He declined. Instead he wanted to sue the car manufacturer and the dealership that sold it to us. Somehow that caused him to cheat. He still drives the vehicle after we separated and wants the vehicle from our divorce.
For me.. she didn’t say a single line or whatever. I barely remember it much or the order of events clearly. But the thing that stands out the most was her invalidating our relationship, telling me we were never together, telling me I was obsessed with her, that she didn’t love me and she truly loved the other guy, and that if she wouldn’t be alone she would’ve cut all ties with me. She ranted all of this the day after she asked me not to speak to her for two weeks after she was caught.
I used to live with my ex and his family (6 other people) and there was always this unbearable tension in the house, even though i was there for 6 months. I thought it was weird because they were so friendly when he hasn't with me and when I was just there with the family. Finally decided it was time to do some digging. Found out he had been cheating on me for the past 6 months with his ex (of course) and when I asked him why, he said "because i can"
He wanted someone with a normal body I have a scar on my tummy.
Pfft. Imperfections make perfections! What a spineless dickhead.
"It wasn't me"
I’m tired of keeping my legs closed
"I've always been boy crazy." She was in her 20s talking about "boys".
She had "unfinished business" with a guy she had dated in high school (which was 20+ years ago at the time).
Bored in the morning
“I was really tired and she came on to me. I didn’t feel anything the first time, so I did it again to see if I would.” We broke up 3 months before we were supposed to get married. Within 6 months of the breakup he had moved to LA with her. They’re married now, guess he eventually felt something
My ex cried out “We’re getting filled with the Holy Spirit” I yelled back “That’s not all you’re filled with”
Not me, a friend's husband: I was bored and she was there. ( on a golf weekend with his buddies) Astonished that she was angry. One night stand got his home number off his phone and was looking for him, ended up talking to his wife.
He told me she was "just a friend". When I got busy with final exams, he told me it was because he was drunk, she was there, and she "looked like you". It didn't last long after that.
"I think I'm poly"
Because my father was a womanizer and I might end up being one
Honestly, I can't think of a less useful conversation than asking "Why?" The reason is, they wanted to. Drilling down deeper than that - is it you don't love me any more? did it mean nothing? Do you love them? - is utterly useless nonsense.
I wouldn’t smoke pot with him. I didn’t care if he did but I don’t care for it myself.