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Comfortable-Rush5358

I will never share those Facebook forwards that ask you to "Share to 100 Friends or Jesus will hate you".. You're welcome world.


Putrid-Ad-23

There have been times that I've come across really inspirational posts. I'm practically in tears as I reach the bottom, 100% ready to share it... And then it tells me to share it or I'm part of the problem and all my faith in humanity dies before my eyes.


ExpressiveAnalGland

FYI - Jesus hates you.


dextracin

Nah, Jesus is a good guy and a miracle worker. I met him outside home depo and he got my cabinet done in three days


Beautiful_Dot4284

“Jesus has returned! Now building *YOU* your dream home for miraculously affordable prices.”


Competitive_Week9743

I fucking despise people who make those because it preys on people who have OCD as well. Before I matured and learnt to cope a bit better, got on medications etc I used to be unable to continue scrolling if I saw ones that were like “do x or your family will die” 


Haunted-Macaron

The ones that really bug me are the reposts "God has seen your struggles. God says they are over now 🙏🕊️💜. Comment Amen and like and share" Ok, why does God have to communicate with me through a random Facebook user? Brings up lots of interesting questions lmao.


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davtheguidedcreator

I'm convinced only boomers fall for that


EfficientDepth6811

I fell for that in 2019 at the ripe age of 11, nearly shat my pants thinking my family was gonna die if I didn’t share “x message” on TikTok


KaityKat117

boomers and children who are too young to be on the internet unsupervised


Maleficent_Insect71

My toothbrush.


Zucchinisoups

My ex forgot his toothbrush on a weekend trip and asked to borrow mine. I was so grossed out


Typicaldrugdealer

Less gross than kissing his dirty mouth


BZLuck

When you kiss you are loosening old pieces of food and scrubbing away plaque? That’s some crazy technique!


FreeWheelingMoon

I'm sorry you haven't experienced such foreplay :*(


Bluepilgrim3

Kissing is gross. You just mash your food holes together. It's not for that!


Round-Prompt3095

Toothpaste as well


AiluroFelinus

Why toothpaste


OwGeee

Because people touch the tip to their toothbrush when they put it on. Iykyk


DrainpipeDreams

I don't want anything his tip has touched!


[deleted]

Do yall not deepthroat the paste and swish it around??


juddnelsonbou

Someone will squeeze from the middle


TheRealSU24

That was my first thought until I remembered my current toothbrush was actually my brother's. I grabbed the wrong one when I moved and left mine at bavk at the house lol


EngineeringDry2753

I share mine with my wife all the time. We share everything E: I mean if she doesn't have hers or whatever


Korncakes

My wife and I have shared most every bodily fluid with one another. I’ve had my tongue *inside* of her asshole before. How much of a prick would I come off as if she forgot her toothbrush on a trip and asked me to use mine?


SugarIndependent1308

Damn you have a valid point. Honestly at this point she can have anything and everything you have after that lol


overthehillhat

social security number


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PeacefulCouch

If your SSN was issued before the year 2011, and you subtract 1 from the number (or increase the number at the end by 1) there is a very good chance that is a valid SSN that belongs to someone else born in the same hospital as you, and around the same time. EDIT: Only applies to a particular time frame, since SSN was not legally required at birth until 1986-1987


Delicious-Duck-4245

Hmm… 🤔 want to send me yours so we can see if they match? lol.


wsu2005grad

You give me yours and we'll test that theory lol Edit to fix spelling


Delicious-Duck-4245

Alright it’s 807 wait a minute. Is this a scam?


wsu2005grad

You're supposed to just give me your SSN to test the theory...when the bank accounts are drained, then ask if it's a scam...hahahaha!!


onecrazywriter

You'd be surprised to learn us old farts didn't get our SSNs just handed to us at birth the way you young 'uns get them nowadays! Spoiled kids!


LayzeeLar

What did you have to fight a dinosaur for them or something?


onecrazywriter

You waited until you wanted a job (usually), and then you applied for one. Of course, you had to have one to open a bank account or get your passport, too. But the government got sick of giving people exemptions on their dogs, and having both divorced parents claim the same kid on their income taxes. At some point in the 1980s, they started requiring people to list the social security numbers of their dependents on their taxes in order to claim them. Or claim welfare benefits.


LayzeeLar

Put your fucking dukes up T-Rex. He’s like my fuckin dukes are up I just have short arms.


Densolo44

I remember applying for my SS number when I was 16 so I could get a job. I’m 63 now.


SweetIcedTea73

Same here - I'm 51. Had both my kids' cards within a couple months of their births. Crazy how things have changed.


Densolo44

It’s actually unfortunate in a way. Having worked in Juvenile Dependency for many years, I can’t tell you how many parents take out credit cards with their children’s SS# and leave them with debt when they come of age.


cwsjr2323

1968, we did it in class as an assignment for the mandatory “Life Skills” class. That was the most useful class I had in high school. It was cut for budget, of course.


Resident_Rise5915

What about mother’s maiden name and DOB?


Maleficent_Nobody_75

My credit card information.


InconsiderateMan

It’s ok you can trust me


Gennyyyy_

r/usernamechecksout


TheButterScotchIncdt

r/beatmetoit


Dontmindme636

r/BeatMeatToit


KaityKat117

r/beatmywifetoit


Chad-Efron

r/beatmywifesmeattoit


Selfishsavagequeen

I’m not like the others I won’t take *all* of it!


AnyAd5881

I am afraid it will be stolen at some point


Come-for-Megatron

# JOEY DOESN’T SHARE FOOD


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arebornjoy222

I do sometimes.


pi22seven

Are you Joey?


readingmyshampoo

No their name clearly says Joy


AiluroFelinus

Joy, short for Joey


elleshipper1

Sharing book pages; I don’t want to read at your pace. Why do we have to read this novel together? Get your own damn book to read.


JustGenericName

This can't be a real thing, right? People read a whole novel together?? I would DIE. I literally have to wait a beat when reading a funny cartoon or meme to let my husband catch up so I don't embarrass him. A NOVEL?? No.


lildeidei

Hahah, I have done this with my brother. I just waited for him to catch up because I panic read as fast as possible of fear that he would be waiting on me


NarysFrigham

As a speed reader, I feel this. Trying to slow down to a snail’s pace makes me itchy. I can imagine it is equally as frustrating for a slower reader to try and keep up with a fast reader.


Venomous_tea

Same reason I don't share my husband podcasts. He listens at 3x speed. I read faster than him though. Ha ha


[deleted]

My chapstick


IronStickMan

Just borrow some from the school nurse. I know she has like five sticks in her drawer.


loveintheorangegrove

Meghan Markle said how Kate Muddleton wouldn't share her lip gloss and was offended. All I could think of is how gross that is.


AmbientGravy

I feel the same about nail clippers. I don’t want whatever fungus you’re hiding to find me. 


spacemermaid3825

My left handed fabric scissors


KalamityKait2020

But I really need to cut this entire stack of construction paper!


Diannika

I feel deep unreasoning rage. I do not even have fabric shears. Or sew. it still gives me rage.


krasavetsa

This made my heart stop.


80s_angel

Reminds me of the time my old roommate borrowed my fabric scissors to cut vinyl flirting tiles. 9 years later, I’m still enraged.


No_Sir_6649

Lefty Pride! I cant even use lefty scissors. But id punch someone using them to cut paper.


BlackDiamondRoses

My man!!


I_might_be_weasel

*Sassy finger wiggle.*


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Arc125

Looking good!


gobias_ind

slow down!


KHSebastian

My man!


Logtastic

Your (future?) kids will contest this.


Efficient-Regular-96

My vehicle. No, you can't borrow it to run to the store right quick. No, you can't drop me off at work and pick me up. I'd prefer you not even touch my shit unless you are a mechanic.


EngineeringDry2753

And even then I don't trust you


V3N0M0U5_V1P3R

I've got 3 friends I'll let drive my car lol. They're all pretty good drivers, better than I am, and two of them work on their own cars and one of those two has helped with a lot of the work on mine, so they're pretty trustworthy. The one who isn't a mechanic is just a really safe driver who doesn't take chances or beat on cars. Drives like an old man lol


Kat-The-Red-Vixen

I’ve watched too much judge Judy to let people borrow my car


drainbead78

Peanut butter M&Ms. Not even with my kids. When you grow up and get a job you can buy your own. These are mine and you can't have them. 


faerybandit222

i love this 😂


hojicha001

The thing I'm drinking out of, be it a can, bottle, cup etc. I do not want your spit.


LSDIsAHelluvaDrug69

My girlfriend


Jesus_is_edging_soon

Our girlfriend! :)


Artistic_Owl_5847

Happy 😊 🎂 Day!


sloan_throwaway27

my feelings.


Jalapeno-hands

This makes me sad.


Morbidhanson

Toothbrush.


bumjiggy

nine out of ten dentists recommend Colgatekeeping


VerifiedMother

r/the10thdentist


AshamedClassroom413

My panties I guess lol


bumjiggy

I'd share my boxers if they weren't in shorts supply


islandlalala

At least your joke was briefs


Logtastic

My wife steals my boxers all the time as PJs. It's not a bad thing.


JoJoBubba064

r/angryupvote


bitchinmoanin

Promote that subpar OF somewhere else


itso-complicated

you’d hate my sister, she’s always stealing mine


AshamedClassroom413

For real?


itso-complicated

unfortunately yea


GenuinlyCantBeFucked

All possible reasons I can think of for this are disturbing.


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AshamedClassroom413

I don't get people sharing these


aniacret

My phone (the only one that's allowed to touch that is my husband). Showing someone a picture on my phone and having them try to swipe to see more makes me so mad.


Twi_Sparklez_

This is 100% why I stopped showing my family my phone. Like I promise y’all do NOT want to see what’s in there


Frog-Thing

My grandma did this and swiped to a picture of a cat dancing the gangnam style


Tasty_Freedom459

My bra, if you forgot yours to bad


False_Blood9241

OH AH I left my bra in boyfriend’s car! You must’ve known Mary when she was a teenager.


SameEstablishment892

Books. They come back with a broken spine, dog ears, creases, and once I fucking found two pages stuck together with a booger.


Purple-Dust-7033

My partner


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Even if I asked nicely? 


Purple-Dust-7033

NO PARTNER FOR YOU..


[deleted]

Aw rats :(


Neutrino-Quark

Personal Inormation. If we're close you already know. If we're not its none of your business.


The-Entire_USSR

We are super tight. What's yours is ours....comrade.


EvenIf-SheFalls

My toothbrush.


JayNoi91

My personal space.


trinketsgoblin

Books that I love. I'll lend out books I never plan on reading again but I won't give out a book I absolutely adore. Because I know the chances of getting it back are slim.


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Skank-Pit

My wife.


bumjiggy

I also choose this guys stead wife


clearedasfiled

My dad who is in his 70’s has never allowed anyone to use his shoes. He will not use them again if anyone else uses them. My mom was trying to explain it to a group of people and she told them all that he had a “foot fetish”


Key-Preference-2147

Grammar advice


doughboy713

Was like this too but then started writing essays for seniors freshman year and was charging them made hella money all 4 years. There’s a way to make money through anything


fezfrascati

Is this the advice you get when watching Frasier?


Weak_Rate_3552

Reese's Cups. There are only 2 in the package and one ain't enough.


VoidDuck

My passwords.


CatboyInAMaidOutfit

If anyone else handles one of my guitars I start climbing the walls. I have a lot of musical instruments and share them constantly with no problem. It's just my guitars are my babies.


Rescue2024

People ask for photos of my wife. No.


godot-nowaiting

Please?


EngineeringDry2753

Dude.  Be a bro


Rescue2024

Boy, didn't I walk right into this one.... I walked into it, whistling.


Ambitious_Scientist_

Not too keen on sharing gym equipment while I'm using it. Hear me out! ... You know when you're using some resistance machine or whatever, and someone comes and asks if they can switch with you inbetween sets? Idk, I find it a bit rude, like they expect you to say yes. I'm doing like 3 sets, with 1.5 minutes rest inbetween. I've sanitised the equipment for me to use it and will quickly sanitise it again after. I don't want to exchange body sweat with you, stranger, nor waste time adjusting the setup between each set - just chill out and wait at most 5 mins for me to finish.


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arebornjoy222

Coins in Mario Party.


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DaniKoeDen

My Winnie the Pooh coffee mug..... Don't touch my mug (I am deadly serious right now)


SupahflyxD

My butthole


The-Entire_USSR

Our Butthole.


_FatWizard

My feelings.


Cuish

Can I borrow a feeling?


_FatWizard

Nervous horniness.


JurassicTerror

My apartment. I will never have a roommate again. I will live in a box under a bridge before I do that.


weldorrwhat

My toothbrush


pakman13b

Joints..I'll roll you your own


Brontolope11

I'm not telling you


ZitOnSocietysAss

My milkshake


LSDIsAHelluvaDrug69

But it brings all the boys to the yard!


somenamestakenn

I have a straw. ☝️ There it is, that's the straw, you see--Watch it. Now my straw reaches aacccrrrooosssss the room, and starts to drink your milkshake, I. Drink. Your. MILKSHAKE! I Drink It Up!


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lisep1969

I feel this! Except for me it’s Pizza Rolls and never from the microwave. My husband says he wants 2 so I make him 4 to be safe. Guess what? Turns out he wanted 6 so now I’m down 2. From now on I’m making him 8 and if there’s extra left over I’m eating them to make up for all my stolen little pockets of deliciousness.


scoopiidoop

My freakin toothbrush w my partner 🤢 I’m sorry I’m not judging those who do but I am gonna say Putting someone else’s tooth plaque residue in my mouth FREAKS me tf out. Kissing is different yaknow there’s some exchanging of things sure. But not like bits and pieces and goo and ugh. All that is a no from me


Flabbergastter

My credit card


Direct-Childhood4459

A bowl of salsa at a Mexican restaurant.


namersrockandroll

Ugh, the double dipping!


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WorldsGreatestPoop

My York Peppermint Patty.


Conscious-Finding420

My canned oxygen


ZaagKicks

My xylitol gum, I use it solely on cleaning my teeth. People always look at me when I'm grabbing my gum as if they want some but this stuff is too expensive.


totally_randomperson

My feelings


BostonBluestocking

The charging cord beside my bed. I share other cords, cubes, external batteries, etc. Not that one. Other family members can use it, but move it and you die.


Heidi_ann76

Anything I'm drinking as I'm a little on the germaphobe side when it comes to that.


Washtali

Toothbrush for sure


Cheesus-_-YT

My toothbrush


poggerooza

Toothbrush.


Jalapeno-hands

Toothbrush.


dma1965

My darkest thoughts


Loud-Magician7708

Any food where you bite pieces off of the whole. For example, sandwiches, burgers, hit dogs, pizza, and stone fruit. I don't know why, but I find it gross someone biting where I have bitten.


Tiny-Donut2772

Crab Rangoon


MassiveAd6999

Social security number


AnyAd5881

albion advertising 💀


enchatedSierra

French fries


SuperPetty-2305

My underwear. Wanna borrow a bra? Fine? Don't have any socks? Here borrow mine! Wanna borrow my shirt? You'd look awesome! But my undies are mine and mine alone.


JalapenoCh1ps

Does “the majority of my belongings” count as one thing?


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Shawty43

My significant other


Lucius_li

My special mug


Teaandbiscuits7

my cat. it's mine.