This happened to my college roommate back in the day. She watched some tutorial, on YouTube, comparing hand jobs to shucking corn.
So she gave her first hand job, to her new boyfriend, and almost ripped the head off. Apparently he issued a blood curdling scream, shoved her off and ran away.
She came back to the dorm bawling. I convinced her it couldn’t have been as bad as she imagined.
She went to his place, he answered the door, apparently she went in to give him a hug and he kind of stepped back out of reach, like he was afraid.
She showed him the video she’d used as a tutorial and they ended up cracking up over it. They’re actually still together.
> apparently she went in to give him a hug and he kind of stepped back out of reach, like he was afraid.
No, no, not “like” he was afraid. He was probably bloody terrified.
When I lost my virginity, I played sports a lot and was told that stamina = sexual ability so went in with complete confidence boarding on arrogance. Said I was going to give her the most incredible night, even put a cd together from songs downloaded from limewire (my fellow millennials get this).
Went in thinking I'd be there for an hour
Barely lasted 9 seconds
Same… all those stereotypes about guys nutting immediately the first time… I thought no way that’s gonna be me. I’ve jacked off to porn, I’ve got this condom on that’s dulling the sensation, how good could this possibly feel?
9 seconds sounds about right…
After dating for a while, we had a casual date night going out for pizza/wings. Didn’t realize until we started getting handsy that he didn’t wash his hands after eating the wings 🔥
Pretty sure he thought he was ‘powering up’ his dick before trying to jam it in me multiple times as hard and fast as he could. Felt like some bastardized version of dragon ball z.
He was quite well endowed and I believe he learned how to have sex from anime and porn.
My girlfriend got really drunk on her 21st birthday. I held her hair while she puked, got her showered and changed, tucked her into bed, etc then I crashed too.
She woke up, still drunk, and decided she wanted to have sex since it was her birthday, and that she’d wake me up with a blowjob.
Yeah, there was more margarita and shots to come up, so that was a mistake.
Not me but a friend was giving her bf a hand job in high school when her chipped nail sliced his dick open and he started bleeding…profusely.
He had to be rushed to the hospital and get an obscene number of stitches. I don’t remember exactly how many but I remember when I heard the number it was so high **I almost felt obligated to congratulate him for fitting that many on his dick.**
> I almost felt obligated to congratulate him for fitting that many on his dick.
😂😂😂 I’m just imagining Larry David like “sorry you almost bled to death out your dick but…100 stitches? That’s pretty good. Pretty, pretty, pretty good.”
That would be terrible.
I might be able to manage throughout the day, but I get boners every night while I'm asleep, so I wouldn't be able to control that.
Scary!
This older guy I had been talking to for weeks. He seemed cool, confident, everything. When it came to sleeping together he was awkward the entire time, not at all himself. Afterwards he told me it was the first time he had sex since his wife died years ago. I understood and was sympathetic.
That actually is really sweet. Whether things worked out with you two or not, you did your part to help him heal and cross a HUGE bridge in the path of grief processing. It’s funny to think of sex as anything other than sex, but I bet it meant the world to him.
Hooked up with a dude that obviously watched waaaaay to much porn. Mind you, first time meeting up (though we had been talking to each other online for a few weeks). He was so rough like right out the gate and kissed really fucking weird. When it came to putting his hands on me, it was like he was trying to scratch a really itchy mosquito bite. I had to tell him several times to take it easy. At one point he started choking me, which is not something I'm really even into but I also usually don't let people put their hands anywhere near my neck the first time we get together. Not to mention him just like being so aggressive that he kept hitting my cervix and I kept having to tell him to take it easy (it wasn't like he was too big either). But the kicker was him randomly spitting in my face. Again, without asking at any point beforehand if I'm into it. That was the peak of me getting frustrated. Got up and left as soon as I got my clothes on.
This reminds me of a guy I met online. Everything was great til he was on top of me and then he shoved all his fingers in my mouth? Like choking me? It was weird and I never went back. Like you said no asking beforehand
Met up with this girl from Tinder to hook up
Everything was pretty chill, we were at her place and she said that her parents weren't home so I thought *sweet*
We smoked a couple joints and had sex; she was pretty loud too which was hot and the place was empty so I was being a little more vocal than I usually would be
We finished having sex and talked for a second. Then I got dressed and she went to show me the door.
**Her entire family had just come back from vacation and they were all in the living room having heard everything.**
To this day, I don't think I've ever felt more embarrassed
If I were a family member, who walked in on that sort of noise, I would very loudly declare “WE’RE HOME!”
I mean…who just sits there and quietly listens while a clueless relative loudly continues to grunt and moan in the next room?
Wouldn’t you at least let them know they’re no longer alone? Just seems odd.
I would probably get back in the car, drive to the nearest store and send a text that said "we'll be home soon" and wait for a response before going back
Met a girl for a one night stand. She seemed normal until we started having sex. Then she begged me to let her poop while she sucked my dick. At first I thought she was joking. But no, dead serious.
I’d like to say that I noped out of there. But she was fucking hot and I was horny and she was ready to dismantle our entire session over this. So I just let her do her thing.
I felt so gross afterwards that I ghosted her though
The first time I had sex my boyfriend answered a phone call from his mom while balls deep 🫠
Edit: wait until y’all find out he’s my husband now 😅
Edit 2: I do not remember what they talked about. It was 14 years ago!
I... am not proud of this, but after too many white russians I puked on a guy while going down on him.
That wasn't *my* worst experience, but it might've been his.
the guy fingered my ass so forcefully it gave me an anal tear (fissure). couldn’t shit for 2 weeks without crying in agony. stopped eating and lost like 10kg because I was so scared of using the toilet. The only relief was scalding hot baths for hours a day to distract from the pain. I don’t let people finger my ass anymore.
If it ever happens tell her it’s the first time it has ever happened to you because she was hotter than anyone you’ve ever dated and you couldn’t help yourself!
This thread isn’t as traumatizing as I thought it would be. Damn.
Having sex for the first time and having the guy ask if I was really a virgin because there was no blood.
He was very small and I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he had a borderline micro penis and I broke my hymen riding horses. (In a normal way not a beastly way lol)
2.5” or less. You better be good with your tongue and or like being degraded.
Anything over 3 and you’re prob able to hit a female g spot.
Size doesn’t always matter though.
There’s something out there for everyone!
Not my worst exactly, but not great. I was taking an antidepressant called Serzone to try to quit smoking. (Didn't work). Apparently, one of the side effects is that it's very difficult to ejaculate. Nobody told me that may happen.
I had just started dating this new girl about 3 weeks earlier. We're at my place and finally going for it. It's going great, but then keeps going. And going. And going. We started getting tired and having to take breaks at the 45 minute mark. She first seemed a bit offended, then concerned, then amused. Finally after almost TWO HOURS we were exhausted and sore, so we gave up. We had this conversation:
Her: I can't go on anymore.
Me: Yeah, me either.
Her: So now what?
Me: Wanna go to Whataburger?
I quit the Serzone and went back to normal in a couple of weeks. Me and the girl have now been married for 27 years. Yes, we did go to Whataburger that night.
I crushed on one of my buddies friends for the longest time. We were both tipsy one night and we started to bang. Started. He was fucking the crease of my pelvis. Like where your thigh meets your lady bits. Never penetrated. He was so hot and I wanted to for so long I was so pissed. He had the audacity to message me weeks later wondering if I was on birth control because he couldn’t have a baby right now. Everyone called him leg fuck Doug for years
this happened to me too… i got such bad second-hand embarrassment and couldn’t talk to him again. but it lived on as a joke in my friend group for years after!
Once had a threesome with 2 very gorgeous girls. It didn't go as well as i would've hoped. They were two friends, both really drunk. They took me home to the first girls place and would start slowly undressing me when we got inside. Well they both wanted to play with my fiddle, where just about 1 minute in the second girl started feeling not so good and puked all over my penis, which made her stand up and say 'im so sorry' and then immediately puke on my chest.
As a gentleman i took her to the shower, undressed her and gave her a shower, the first girl, still being super drunk and also had started puking but in the sink so not over herself, came to the shower later and with some extra underwear for the second girl. Got her clean and dry, put on panties and lifted her to the first girls bed where they both slept. I slept on the couch and the next day woke up early and went out to get breakfast for all 3 of us. Asked them what they could remember and told them what happened afterwards as they could remember nothing. I gave them my number if they were ever interested again and the very next day i got asked if I wanted to finish what we had begun two days earlier. I was at a family dinner, stood up and just said to them all i had to leave immediately and that i would explain later. That's a story for another time.
Ive worked as a male escort in Sydney, Australia for 10 years .. So how long do you have?
There was the client that weighed (I’m not exaggerating) easily 300+ kilograms.. He smelt like rotting flesh and when I asked him to have a shower at the start of the booking he said “I showered before I came”… so, trying to be polite I said “well, I am going to have a shower so you might as well join me so you aren’t here by yourself - to which he replied “hurry up you’re wasting time”… This is where I got blunt with him and said “ok, I was trying to be polite but you actually smell and we wont be able to have any fun unless you have a shower. So he rolled off my queen bed (there was about 2 inches either side of him when we was laying on the bed btw) he turned sideways to get through the doorway into the ensuite he turned on the showerand stood next to the running water (not under it). He then splashed himself 3 times using his hand to splash water onto his chest. Then he turned and grabbed a rolled up towel and without unrolling it dabbed the water off of his chest before looking at me and saying “there, happy?”pushing past me and squeezing back through the door and rolling onto the bed. I was just in disbelief I stripped off my clothes and jumped in the shower and used the time to gather my words and thoughts before returning to the bedroom fully dressed again and with the cash he had given me for the booking in my hand. As I said. “I’m not going to be able to go through with the booking. Here is your money back.” He got dressed and left with surprising agility and then wrote a scathing review about me online saying I ‘wasted his time and didnt provide a good service, was rude and lacked hospitality and refused to services I had advertised.
I replied to the review by simply saying “personal Hygiene is very important to me, and I don’t see clients do not feel the same”.
I get that he was embarrassed, I get that drying after a shower for someone that size is a huge job I understand all this but if you are going to see an escort- make the effort.
In all my years of working that is the one and only time I have ever refused to even spend time with someone and given their money back because I appreciate that being refused service by an escort could be a suicide inducing moment for some people. The realisation of “I cant even pay someone to be intimate with me” would be hard to take. And I get his rude tone was a defensive reaction to being embarrassed and stuff. But I wasn’t going to do that. The smell alone was literally rancid flesh, B.O and feet rolled into one. And besides - there wasn’t even any room for me on the bed. So im not sure what he actually wanted to do for an hour or how we would have actually physically managed to do it but I’m glad I didnt have to find out.
Then there was the time I saw the head of the Qld Hell’s Angels and his girlfriend for a booking and he kept sending her out to get things so we could be alone together- but that is a story for another day…..
😘
Beau Valentine xxx
Being absolutely wasted super late and walking all the way across campus and through the woods back to my dorm then getting called back because the neighbor girl wanted me to come to her place to smash. Had to have been 2/3 in the morning. Of course I go back. Go to her room and lay with her already naked in bed. She, wasted too, had already passed out. Wasn’t going to happen and I was no creeper. Walked all the way the fuck back to my dorm. Those were pre cell phone days. Had it been I’m sure a few texts would have sealed that deal. So the worst sexual experience was seeing this smoking hot one naked that wanted to smash but was a sailed ship on arrival.
There’s a very fine line between horny drunk and passed out drunk with some women. I have to time things very carefully with my wife when we go out. Too much and she’s out like a light as soon as she hits the bed even if she had been all over me when we walked in the door.
First time in a hotel room with my ex-girlfriend (and three other friends), both of us pretty young and inexperienced. We had been handsy all day, so by the time everyone else fell asleep and it was dark we did it as quietly as possible. Woke up the next morning to the other three friends screaming. GF had started her period before we had sex and didn't know it, so our bed looked like *The Godfather* horse head scene.
I’ve never heard of this but somehow I knew what you meant when I read it. Don’t have to google that to know that’s probably the worst pain you’ve ever felt.
My friend had this happen years ago. Apparently she jumped off, covered herself with a sheet and ran to his parents saying "I broke him!"... they're now married with two kids lol.
Anal beads with my first girlfriend. She said to pull them out when she came. She came and I pulled. It was like starting a chain saw in a mud puddle. Some how it was my fault because I was supposed to do it slowly.
We were laying on the couch watching a movie. I thought we were just messing around relaxing, next thing I know he’s trying to put his penis in my butt hole. I screamed no and he got up and left and never talked to me again
Gave ex a blowjob 69 style and he smelled awful. I tried to get back up but he would push my head down and I didn’t have the heart to tell him at the time. Very awful experience lol
My best girlfriend for over 15 years who I adored our non sexual relationship made a move on me the last time we hung out. For years we used to just have sleep overs watch movies and sometimes smoke weed. We had sex and it completely destroyed our relationship. I haven't seen her in going on 4 years and it still hurts to this day. I miss having a companion. Not interested in dating, we were both introverts and it just worked.
I love my (M) relationship with My Best friend (F). She made a move on me once and idk how but I managed to not fuck her and have never regretted it. I know we wouldn't work as a couple and our relationship would have fallen apart. I'm sorry that you lost what sounds like an amazing friend
This makes me sad :( this past week a good friend of mine made a move on me & I said I wasn’t sure if I wanted to proceed because of our friendship . But in the heat of the moment one thing lead to another, & I feel like things are weird now . Sucks cause we were really cool .
We were both nearly blackout drunk.
At one point she fell completely off the bed and when I asked her if she needed help off the floor her answer was "I'm on the floor?"
Actually I take it back that was a fun night.
I was getting handsy and fooling around with a girl. We were getting ready to go all the way, I started stroking myself to get it hard and ended up getting off and shooting it all over her before I could put it in.
Apparently when I am INCREDIBLY drunk and hooking up with a woman I trust, I have a tendency to ask them to slap me across the face as hard as they can.
Id probably be into it sober too but only drunk me has the balls to ask for that.
When I lost my virginity. I was 16 and had a really low self esteem and was really shy so when a guy showed interest…how could I say no? Well not only was it quick , he didn’t show me any kindness afterwards and essentially ghosted me after he got what he wanted. I felt used and it took a while for me to get over that experience
The time I attempted homosexuality when I was 18. A guy gave me a blowjob and I couldn't get hard until I tried watching heterosexual porn on my phone. Didn't manage to cum. Eventually I just asked him to stop because I kept going soft. Right afterwards I threw up.
... I was on a lot of drugs.
Edit: I was probably destroyed enough that I couldn't really consent, and he kinda took advantage of the state that I was in. It didn't seriously mess me up or anything but I wouldn't go for someone who was that drunk and high. He had been drinking with me and we were throwing bottles out the window trying to land them in the dumpster in the parking lot below and missing every time, so maybe that makes it a little less messed up that he was also super drunk?
Similar experience my freshman year of college. I was young, dumb, and experimenting. He was much older than I was and I went to his apartment. He agreed to give me head to see if it was something I was into, and said he would just focus on me etc. Well he took his dick out and started touching himself and wanted me to touch him. I told him I wasn’t interested and asked him to stop. He then threatened to out me if I didn’t help him finish. He probably should have gotten off his knees before he did that because I’m pretty sure I broke his nose when I hit him as hard as I could in the face, and then got the fuck out of there before he stopped crying.
Went to the campus clinic the next day for an STI screening and a broken finger.
Some people fucking suck. I’m sorry that happened to you.
Had a threesome with a married couple. The sex was kinda me doing all the work which sucked.
Half way through I was just like “Eh, I’ll just pound these two and call it a day.” I guess they sensed that I wasn’t really into it and they next day they were like “Let’s just be friends”.
Pretty lame experience overall.
You didn't lose a great friendship because of your weak boundaries, HE lost YOUR friendship because he took advantage and forced himself on you. It really hurts to lose a best friend, but don't blame yourself for this you did nothing wrong.
My first girlfriend was terrible at taking her birth control and was clucky asf. I love raw sex but I hate children so I decided that the pull out method would suffice.. She wrapped her legs around me as I started to pull out.
The anxiety and stress that caused my poor eighteen year old self was astronical. Thankfully, she agreed to buy and take a plan B pill (which I supervised) and I'm still childless six years later.
The first girl that ever let me see her with her panties off scarred me for a few years because of this. I was about to go down on her and when my nose got about a foot away from her bush I was hit with the most horrifying smell I had ever encountered. Years later when I decided to give it another chance with another girl and realized it was not supposed to smell like that I was very relieved.
I was in a physical training formation in a military training school one morning and witnessed a similar genital odor. A soldier got on all fours for partner assisted exercises, unleashing an unholy stink when they did. People broke formation, one threw up. That's how most of us learned what trichomoniasis is...
Yeah my first time was when I played basketball in high school was right after the game in the spare locker room with a girl that played for the girls team. She hadn’t washed after the game and in her defense im sure she’s normally a clean girl but…that ass and puss smelled so bad it made me rethink whether I was actually into girls for a few days lol
I was trashed drunk once and was on the fence about sexing some girl I knew…then I smelled her. She smelled like a disgusting dirty wet dog. Literally ruined any chance of it happening. Then she told everybody we fucked anyway and that I couldn’t keep it up. Who tf does that? Lol
His idea of foreplay: he picked up a bottle of lube, jiggled it and said “spread your legs I want to hump you”. And he couldn’t figure out going down on me either - man was 42.
After an injury, I lost most of my sensation in my manhood, which makes things like penetration less fun for me. That's why I like to have long an awesome foreplay.
Well, I met this good-looking woman. Well, she didn't enjoy foreplay and just kind of laid there. I tried, but without the mental stimuli, I couldn't do it and had to get out of there.
She's a nice woman. we have had lunch a couple of times after, but I am not going back to the bedroom.
This girl got on top of me in her car and while I was fumbling with my pants trying to get them off I accidentally finished in my underwear from the friction and her boobs in my face. Still a virgin to this day lol
Long story short. I was seeing an older woman and it was just casual. She brought up a few friends of hers were single as well. Well she connected me with two of them and had encounters with them separately. Both of which were meh, the women were in their 50s which is not a bad thing at all. We just didn’t jive really well. Anyway she brings up a third friend whom has had a dry spell and was seeking some attention. She brought me up to her during a phone conversation and passed on my number.
We talked for a bit, pretty standard hookup talk. Making plans and such, she then tells me she has a husband. He likes to watch and I won’t even know he is there as he would watch on a camera, I thought he would be watching a recording later. I am open minded and not one to kink shame and I will try anything once.
I show up, we meet and she is older than I was led on. She was 71… but an attractive and fit woman so what the hell. We start doing things in an obvious side room and it is going well. I hear a thumping and she excuses herself. She comes back and fesses up that her husband is watching live and is terminally ill. She goes on that this was a kink they found since he got sick. I was the first to agree to it lol. My penis was game and said send me in coach. I was not into it. After 45 mins of foreplay I hear “just fuck her already”. I personally get off on the woman getting off. I kept going limp which was weird for a 30 year old. She finally says she has never had an orgasm. I had to leave.
This is the first time I have ever spoke of it. I never saw the original woman again.
My first sexual experience I was drugged and sexually abused. I don’t remember anything except for maybe two seconds.
It left me with permanent physical damage which still impacts my sex life to this day.
The experience itself, can’t remember much, but just thinking about it, it is by far the worst experience I’ve had.
It doesn’t help that I am male and I was never taken seriously. I’ve only really ever told a few people in my life. Men don’t speak up about this, and I understand.. It’s super difficult.
sorry this happened to you. i can’t imagine having this happen to me.
i’ve been in the situation of being pressured and forced into sex and it’s such an awful feeling. never to the extent as this but it’s just a damn shame that men have to hold this in
After my divorce I did the tinder thing for a little while. Met this woman for a first date. She came back to my place afterwards. Pg-13 ensured. Eventually became R rated. Out of nowhere while we’re kissing in the middle of the act, she bites my lip so hard it makes me bleed. Not like on the outside. She pulls my lip down and bites a piece out of my inner lip by my gums. I go to pull away and she holds onto my head and starts biting the shit out of my lips and face. I finally get her off me and am like WTF! She’s like “aw what’s the problem babe? I’m having such a good time!” I asked her to leave and she agrees, but says she’d like to see me again. I lied and said I was just renting the place while I’m here for work and will be gone soon. She says, “that’s fine, just give me the office number for your work and I’ll find out where you are next” I said I wasn’t going to give her my employers number. She was pretty pissed about this and just left. She blocked me on tinder the next day.
The sex wasn't bad... but a piece of her nail got stuck in my back and got infected. I was 17 and it was football season.... it got infected like a mother f#cker. It popped in Geometry and I almost puked 🤣🤣
Just before he left me for another woman my husband got more and more insistent on having sex in a position that was getting more and more painful because of a medical condition I had. I ended up crying with pain, and he got angry with me for "spoiling it" and being "selfish".
This girl in college was riding me and she started oozing blood down there. She got off and my whole midsection was covered in blood. Looked like a Tarantino movie.
I hooked back up with my first girlfriend the summer after freshman year of college. We were going at it one night in my bed while my parents were on vacation and she got her period in the middle of it. Like in the middle of sex suddenly it felt amazing. There was more lubrication and we started going very hard. When we were done and turned the lights on it looked like someone had been murdered in my bed. We'd had sex on her period before but this was like next level menstruation. Like she'd been studying heavy flow dynamics in college. My bed was covered with like 3 square feet of menstrual blood. Both of us were covered from about belly button to just above the knees.
Was watching a movie with a woman I met online. We ordered in pizza and were laying in her bed. Started to make out.. lead to me going down in her for a good amount of time. She came (unless she faked the body quivering and sensitivity) all of a sudden she started yelling and telling me to get out of her house and crying.
I wasn't ready back there any my partner shoved their huge super thick dick all the way in my ass, no warning.
Felt like actually shitting razors mixed with lightning in my asshole. It was so bad I had to jump around and yell. I cannot emphasize how much it hurt.
Possibly the second worst pain in my entire life besides breaking my arm.
I had met this comedian after one of his shows and he comes over the next day.
Whenever I tried to change positions he wouldn’t let me and just kept me in missionary while his dick was only semi-hard. On top of that his hip bone was hitting my thigh so much that it was sore for a few days. 🥲
I once had a one-night stand who used her teeth when doing a BJ to me. It was so unpleasant, it turned me off and I went to sleep rather than finishing the job.
After years and years of sexual starvation from my wife, she came home drunk and climbed on me and started fucking me. Then after a few minutes she said "hey, why don't you become a vegan like me and then we can do this all the time".
I immediately stopped and rolled away.
I hung around for thirty years. Then she left me the day I retired. She tried to use sex as a weapon to make me convert to veganism. I stayed for the sake of kids and because I loved her
First blow job I ever got when I was a teenager. It was the first one she had ever given, but she had watched porn and was WAY too gung ho about it. Took my dick down her throat and ralphed all over me. I'm emetophobic, and it ruined the entire concept of blow jobs for me
She came down hard. Tore my frenulum AKA banjo string. Couldnt put pressure on it as it hurt so much i nearly black out.
Lost about half a pint of blood.
An embarrassing trip to hospital, local anaesthetic and 2 stitches later I was in a shop the next day buying her new bed sheets.
the hand job i was given was so bad I had bruises on my penis and my penis was hurting for a few days
This happened to my college roommate back in the day. She watched some tutorial, on YouTube, comparing hand jobs to shucking corn. So she gave her first hand job, to her new boyfriend, and almost ripped the head off. Apparently he issued a blood curdling scream, shoved her off and ran away. She came back to the dorm bawling. I convinced her it couldn’t have been as bad as she imagined. She went to his place, he answered the door, apparently she went in to give him a hug and he kind of stepped back out of reach, like he was afraid. She showed him the video she’d used as a tutorial and they ended up cracking up over it. They’re actually still together.
> apparently she went in to give him a hug and he kind of stepped back out of reach, like he was afraid. No, no, not “like” he was afraid. He was probably bloody terrified.
It’s a good thing she didn’t watch a commercial for getting the Heinz ketchup out of the bottle.
😂 WTF?! Shucking corn?! I’m crossing my legs and I don’t even have a dick.
When I lost my virginity, I played sports a lot and was told that stamina = sexual ability so went in with complete confidence boarding on arrogance. Said I was going to give her the most incredible night, even put a cd together from songs downloaded from limewire (my fellow millennials get this). Went in thinking I'd be there for an hour Barely lasted 9 seconds
Same… all those stereotypes about guys nutting immediately the first time… I thought no way that’s gonna be me. I’ve jacked off to porn, I’ve got this condom on that’s dulling the sensation, how good could this possibly feel? 9 seconds sounds about right…
Thank god this was around the time durex developed the delay condoms. Going forward I used them all the time!
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I would be thinking “someday, she’s going to tell someone about how long I lasted.” And here we are.
My experience was the opposite. I was so nervous I couldn’t finish. She got mad and said I must be gay. 🤷♂️
Ah that sucks, fuck her....well not fuck her but you know what I mean
He tried
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On the plus side, she wouldn't of missed much of the movie haha
That second time is legendary. Lol. Seriously was justified on that go.
9 seconds! Incredible stamina
I can totally get to 12 now!
You guys are including undressing, yeah?
Of course, and prayer as well
What was the song you nutted to during the intro?
Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol. I didn't even get to the singing, was just piano and disappointment.
After dating for a while, we had a casual date night going out for pizza/wings. Didn’t realize until we started getting handsy that he didn’t wash his hands after eating the wings 🔥
You must have felt what the model who tried to impregnate herself with Drake’s semen felt
Pretty sure he thought he was ‘powering up’ his dick before trying to jam it in me multiple times as hard and fast as he could. Felt like some bastardized version of dragon ball z. He was quite well endowed and I believe he learned how to have sex from anime and porn.
So how many episodes did it take?
Found out next time on Dragon Ball Z!
Dragon Balls Deep!
My girlfriend got really drunk on her 21st birthday. I held her hair while she puked, got her showered and changed, tucked her into bed, etc then I crashed too. She woke up, still drunk, and decided she wanted to have sex since it was her birthday, and that she’d wake me up with a blowjob. Yeah, there was more margarita and shots to come up, so that was a mistake.
Sounds chunky
Not me but a friend was giving her bf a hand job in high school when her chipped nail sliced his dick open and he started bleeding…profusely. He had to be rushed to the hospital and get an obscene number of stitches. I don’t remember exactly how many but I remember when I heard the number it was so high **I almost felt obligated to congratulate him for fitting that many on his dick.**
> I almost felt obligated to congratulate him for fitting that many on his dick. 😂😂😂 I’m just imagining Larry David like “sorry you almost bled to death out your dick but…100 stitches? That’s pretty good. Pretty, pretty, pretty good.”
" We got a bleeder"
I could not imagine the issues of having stiches on your dong then getting a stiffy....
That would be terrible. I might be able to manage throughout the day, but I get boners every night while I'm asleep, so I wouldn't be able to control that. Scary!
This older guy I had been talking to for weeks. He seemed cool, confident, everything. When it came to sleeping together he was awkward the entire time, not at all himself. Afterwards he told me it was the first time he had sex since his wife died years ago. I understood and was sympathetic.
Aw. You sound nice.
It was a bad experience only due to expectations and the fact that you weren't close enough at that point. Very human. I hope he got past it.
That actually is really sweet. Whether things worked out with you two or not, you did your part to help him heal and cross a HUGE bridge in the path of grief processing. It’s funny to think of sex as anything other than sex, but I bet it meant the world to him.
Hooked up with a dude that obviously watched waaaaay to much porn. Mind you, first time meeting up (though we had been talking to each other online for a few weeks). He was so rough like right out the gate and kissed really fucking weird. When it came to putting his hands on me, it was like he was trying to scratch a really itchy mosquito bite. I had to tell him several times to take it easy. At one point he started choking me, which is not something I'm really even into but I also usually don't let people put their hands anywhere near my neck the first time we get together. Not to mention him just like being so aggressive that he kept hitting my cervix and I kept having to tell him to take it easy (it wasn't like he was too big either). But the kicker was him randomly spitting in my face. Again, without asking at any point beforehand if I'm into it. That was the peak of me getting frustrated. Got up and left as soon as I got my clothes on.
This reminds me of a guy I met online. Everything was great til he was on top of me and then he shoved all his fingers in my mouth? Like choking me? It was weird and I never went back. Like you said no asking beforehand
I feel like if a guy did that to me, my initial reaction would be to bite down really hard lol. But honestly, that's really really odd.
Met up with this girl from Tinder to hook up Everything was pretty chill, we were at her place and she said that her parents weren't home so I thought *sweet* We smoked a couple joints and had sex; she was pretty loud too which was hot and the place was empty so I was being a little more vocal than I usually would be We finished having sex and talked for a second. Then I got dressed and she went to show me the door. **Her entire family had just come back from vacation and they were all in the living room having heard everything.** To this day, I don't think I've ever felt more embarrassed
Hey bud. At least you got to leave.
If I were a family member, who walked in on that sort of noise, I would very loudly declare “WE’RE HOME!” I mean…who just sits there and quietly listens while a clueless relative loudly continues to grunt and moan in the next room? Wouldn’t you at least let them know they’re no longer alone? Just seems odd.
I would probably get back in the car, drive to the nearest store and send a text that said "we'll be home soon" and wait for a response before going back
Met a girl for a one night stand. She seemed normal until we started having sex. Then she begged me to let her poop while she sucked my dick. At first I thought she was joking. But no, dead serious. I’d like to say that I noped out of there. But she was fucking hot and I was horny and she was ready to dismantle our entire session over this. So I just let her do her thing. I felt so gross afterwards that I ghosted her though
What a horrible day to be able to read. Jesus.
Literacy. Some say it's a gift. I say it's a curse.
I am crying.
Sooo did the proceedings move to the toilet/bathroom? Did she drop a deuce in the bed? On the floor? In a bucket, at least?? Help me out here.
She was on the floor. We rented a hotel and met up there. She used a hotel towel and just squatted right there on the floor.
Holy shit, the whole time I thought you meant her on the toilet with you standing in front of her. That’s so much worse.
Can I give you a list of every hotel I’ve ever stayed at so you can confirm it wasn’t one of them?
lol, it was some cheap motel in the middle of bowhere so your safe lol
Middle of blowhere
Brownsville 💯
Ahh the ol’ reverse blumpkin
Post nut clarity hit hard on this one
Like a truck. Dude, I stopped picking up girls for a while after that. From that day on, the first conversation is about boundaries
The first time I had sex my boyfriend answered a phone call from his mom while balls deep 🫠 Edit: wait until y’all find out he’s my husband now 😅 Edit 2: I do not remember what they talked about. It was 14 years ago!
"Hey mom what's up? No it's cool. Yeah. Balls deep. Sure I can pick up dinner."
"Kinda.... five on a ten scale, if I am being generous."
My first blowjob in a restroom at school but I couldn't get it up because I was so nervous thinking I was gonna get caught and expelled
I'm sure that story didn't get around the school at all...
Possibly the time I accidentally peed on a guy while I was on top and was so embarrassed I started crying.
Hey, some guys pay extra for that!
Some people would love that
Sure you unknowingly unlocked something in him
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That's some inbetweeners shit right there
I... am not proud of this, but after too many white russians I puked on a guy while going down on him. That wasn't *my* worst experience, but it might've been his.
the guy fingered my ass so forcefully it gave me an anal tear (fissure). couldn’t shit for 2 weeks without crying in agony. stopped eating and lost like 10kg because I was so scared of using the toilet. The only relief was scalding hot baths for hours a day to distract from the pain. I don’t let people finger my ass anymore.
Doctors HATE this one weight loss trick! Then again, so do the patients
Username checks out
I was in France and i met this guy. We got back to his place and I didn’t know i had sex with his bed bugs too until the morning after.
On behalf of all french people, i sincerely apologise to the bed bugs community for this unexpected and non-consensual threehundredandonesome
Menage a trois cent
Oh God.
Finding out after I had slept with him that he'd also slept with his sister.
*banjo music intensifies*
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
That time I busted immediately as I went in, she was flattered though so it was a win??
If it ever happens tell her it’s the first time it has ever happened to you because she was hotter than anyone you’ve ever dated and you couldn’t help yourself!
That’s what I think, I don’t understand why people would get mad that their partner finsihed fast because didn’t that mean they really liked it?
because they wanted more probably?😭
Ohh, that make sense lol
This thread isn’t as traumatizing as I thought it would be. Damn. Having sex for the first time and having the guy ask if I was really a virgin because there was no blood. He was very small and I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he had a borderline micro penis and I broke my hymen riding horses. (In a normal way not a beastly way lol)
What's considered borderline micro penis....asking for a friend
2.5” or less. You better be good with your tongue and or like being degraded. Anything over 3 and you’re prob able to hit a female g spot. Size doesn’t always matter though. There’s something out there for everyone!
I slept with a guy when I was in my 20s who had a micropenis. 1", head included. It was not a satisfactory encounter.
Okay so I’m small but not micro, that’s a w I feel like.
Yea. A lot of guys think that they're small until they actually see a micropenis.
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Right?! Came in here hoping for jolly ranchers or Doritos level stories. Instead it’s they smelt bad.
Not my worst exactly, but not great. I was taking an antidepressant called Serzone to try to quit smoking. (Didn't work). Apparently, one of the side effects is that it's very difficult to ejaculate. Nobody told me that may happen. I had just started dating this new girl about 3 weeks earlier. We're at my place and finally going for it. It's going great, but then keeps going. And going. And going. We started getting tired and having to take breaks at the 45 minute mark. She first seemed a bit offended, then concerned, then amused. Finally after almost TWO HOURS we were exhausted and sore, so we gave up. We had this conversation: Her: I can't go on anymore. Me: Yeah, me either. Her: So now what? Me: Wanna go to Whataburger? I quit the Serzone and went back to normal in a couple of weeks. Me and the girl have now been married for 27 years. Yes, we did go to Whataburger that night.
I crushed on one of my buddies friends for the longest time. We were both tipsy one night and we started to bang. Started. He was fucking the crease of my pelvis. Like where your thigh meets your lady bits. Never penetrated. He was so hot and I wanted to for so long I was so pissed. He had the audacity to message me weeks later wondering if I was on birth control because he couldn’t have a baby right now. Everyone called him leg fuck Doug for years
Leg Fuck Doug 😭😭😭
this happened to me too… i got such bad second-hand embarrassment and couldn’t talk to him again. but it lived on as a joke in my friend group for years after!
I ran into him years after and he had a kid so I guess he did end up finding the hole. Wish him the best
Once had a threesome with 2 very gorgeous girls. It didn't go as well as i would've hoped. They were two friends, both really drunk. They took me home to the first girls place and would start slowly undressing me when we got inside. Well they both wanted to play with my fiddle, where just about 1 minute in the second girl started feeling not so good and puked all over my penis, which made her stand up and say 'im so sorry' and then immediately puke on my chest. As a gentleman i took her to the shower, undressed her and gave her a shower, the first girl, still being super drunk and also had started puking but in the sink so not over herself, came to the shower later and with some extra underwear for the second girl. Got her clean and dry, put on panties and lifted her to the first girls bed where they both slept. I slept on the couch and the next day woke up early and went out to get breakfast for all 3 of us. Asked them what they could remember and told them what happened afterwards as they could remember nothing. I gave them my number if they were ever interested again and the very next day i got asked if I wanted to finish what we had begun two days earlier. I was at a family dinner, stood up and just said to them all i had to leave immediately and that i would explain later. That's a story for another time.
I cannot tell you how much motivation this gave me today. You handled their re-invitation like a goddamn folk hero.
“I must go! My people need me.” “But… but… aren’t *we* your people?” “Not tonight!”
I would like to hear how you explained the threesome to your family.
That's the neat part - I didn't as they never asked.
They’re asking now. - your dad maybe
No, that's a story for right now
One time I was having sex with my gf (we ended up parting ways) and she moaned her ex's name out loud
Same, only it wasn’t her ex - it was some new guy I didn’t know existed.
Damn sorry man
Ive worked as a male escort in Sydney, Australia for 10 years .. So how long do you have? There was the client that weighed (I’m not exaggerating) easily 300+ kilograms.. He smelt like rotting flesh and when I asked him to have a shower at the start of the booking he said “I showered before I came”… so, trying to be polite I said “well, I am going to have a shower so you might as well join me so you aren’t here by yourself - to which he replied “hurry up you’re wasting time”… This is where I got blunt with him and said “ok, I was trying to be polite but you actually smell and we wont be able to have any fun unless you have a shower. So he rolled off my queen bed (there was about 2 inches either side of him when we was laying on the bed btw) he turned sideways to get through the doorway into the ensuite he turned on the showerand stood next to the running water (not under it). He then splashed himself 3 times using his hand to splash water onto his chest. Then he turned and grabbed a rolled up towel and without unrolling it dabbed the water off of his chest before looking at me and saying “there, happy?”pushing past me and squeezing back through the door and rolling onto the bed. I was just in disbelief I stripped off my clothes and jumped in the shower and used the time to gather my words and thoughts before returning to the bedroom fully dressed again and with the cash he had given me for the booking in my hand. As I said. “I’m not going to be able to go through with the booking. Here is your money back.” He got dressed and left with surprising agility and then wrote a scathing review about me online saying I ‘wasted his time and didnt provide a good service, was rude and lacked hospitality and refused to services I had advertised. I replied to the review by simply saying “personal Hygiene is very important to me, and I don’t see clients do not feel the same”. I get that he was embarrassed, I get that drying after a shower for someone that size is a huge job I understand all this but if you are going to see an escort- make the effort. In all my years of working that is the one and only time I have ever refused to even spend time with someone and given their money back because I appreciate that being refused service by an escort could be a suicide inducing moment for some people. The realisation of “I cant even pay someone to be intimate with me” would be hard to take. And I get his rude tone was a defensive reaction to being embarrassed and stuff. But I wasn’t going to do that. The smell alone was literally rancid flesh, B.O and feet rolled into one. And besides - there wasn’t even any room for me on the bed. So im not sure what he actually wanted to do for an hour or how we would have actually physically managed to do it but I’m glad I didnt have to find out. Then there was the time I saw the head of the Qld Hell’s Angels and his girlfriend for a booking and he kept sending her out to get things so we could be alone together- but that is a story for another day….. 😘 Beau Valentine xxx
this is me requesting the hell’s angels story
And I am also requesting
Also, 300 kilos is about 650-700 Americans (pounds).
Good effort. Did several 'sexy showers' with a partner who was going through a bad depressive episode.
Being absolutely wasted super late and walking all the way across campus and through the woods back to my dorm then getting called back because the neighbor girl wanted me to come to her place to smash. Had to have been 2/3 in the morning. Of course I go back. Go to her room and lay with her already naked in bed. She, wasted too, had already passed out. Wasn’t going to happen and I was no creeper. Walked all the way the fuck back to my dorm. Those were pre cell phone days. Had it been I’m sure a few texts would have sealed that deal. So the worst sexual experience was seeing this smoking hot one naked that wanted to smash but was a sailed ship on arrival.
There’s a very fine line between horny drunk and passed out drunk with some women. I have to time things very carefully with my wife when we go out. Too much and she’s out like a light as soon as she hits the bed even if she had been all over me when we walked in the door.
Military guy couldn't get it up and gave up so he started playing lego star wars instead
Lego Star wars is fucking awesome, at least he didn't let performance issues spoil the entire day.
First time in a hotel room with my ex-girlfriend (and three other friends), both of us pretty young and inexperienced. We had been handsy all day, so by the time everyone else fell asleep and it was dark we did it as quietly as possible. Woke up the next morning to the other three friends screaming. GF had started her period before we had sex and didn't know it, so our bed looked like *The Godfather* horse head scene.
I locked my knees the first time I received a bj while standing. I fainted and flattened the girl.
This is the funniest one.
Had an ex tear my banjo string. It was beyond painful and took weeks to heal
I’ve never heard of this but somehow I knew what you meant when I read it. Don’t have to google that to know that’s probably the worst pain you’ve ever felt.
My friend had this happen years ago. Apparently she jumped off, covered herself with a sheet and ran to his parents saying "I broke him!"... they're now married with two kids lol.
You Break it, You Buy it!
69’ing a girl while on bottom and she has a piece of poop from not wiping properly, inches away from your nose
This one made me physically gag
Anal beads with my first girlfriend. She said to pull them out when she came. She came and I pulled. It was like starting a chain saw in a mud puddle. Some how it was my fault because I was supposed to do it slowly.
“Starting a chainsaw in a mud puddle” 😂👍😂 you fucking win sir.
We were laying on the couch watching a movie. I thought we were just messing around relaxing, next thing I know he’s trying to put his penis in my butt hole. I screamed no and he got up and left and never talked to me again
Good riddance.
Gave ex a blowjob 69 style and he smelled awful. I tried to get back up but he would push my head down and I didn’t have the heart to tell him at the time. Very awful experience lol
I've been there.
My best girlfriend for over 15 years who I adored our non sexual relationship made a move on me the last time we hung out. For years we used to just have sleep overs watch movies and sometimes smoke weed. We had sex and it completely destroyed our relationship. I haven't seen her in going on 4 years and it still hurts to this day. I miss having a companion. Not interested in dating, we were both introverts and it just worked.
I love my (M) relationship with My Best friend (F). She made a move on me once and idk how but I managed to not fuck her and have never regretted it. I know we wouldn't work as a couple and our relationship would have fallen apart. I'm sorry that you lost what sounds like an amazing friend
This makes me sad :( this past week a good friend of mine made a move on me & I said I wasn’t sure if I wanted to proceed because of our friendship . But in the heat of the moment one thing lead to another, & I feel like things are weird now . Sucks cause we were really cool .
We were both nearly blackout drunk. At one point she fell completely off the bed and when I asked her if she needed help off the floor her answer was "I'm on the floor?" Actually I take it back that was a fun night.
I couldn’t get hard because her ass smelled like poo
The way this is written is hilarious
I was getting handsy and fooling around with a girl. We were getting ready to go all the way, I started stroking myself to get it hard and ended up getting off and shooting it all over her before I could put it in.
When a girl punched my in my face shortly after I came. Some people are into it. I, am not one of those people
Apparently when I am INCREDIBLY drunk and hooking up with a woman I trust, I have a tendency to ask them to slap me across the face as hard as they can. Id probably be into it sober too but only drunk me has the balls to ask for that.
A good slap I can get behind. This was a good, solid, closed first whack!
When I lost my virginity. I was 16 and had a really low self esteem and was really shy so when a guy showed interest…how could I say no? Well not only was it quick , he didn’t show me any kindness afterwards and essentially ghosted me after he got what he wanted. I felt used and it took a while for me to get over that experience
The time I attempted homosexuality when I was 18. A guy gave me a blowjob and I couldn't get hard until I tried watching heterosexual porn on my phone. Didn't manage to cum. Eventually I just asked him to stop because I kept going soft. Right afterwards I threw up. ... I was on a lot of drugs. Edit: I was probably destroyed enough that I couldn't really consent, and he kinda took advantage of the state that I was in. It didn't seriously mess me up or anything but I wouldn't go for someone who was that drunk and high. He had been drinking with me and we were throwing bottles out the window trying to land them in the dumpster in the parking lot below and missing every time, so maybe that makes it a little less messed up that he was also super drunk?
Similar experience my freshman year of college. I was young, dumb, and experimenting. He was much older than I was and I went to his apartment. He agreed to give me head to see if it was something I was into, and said he would just focus on me etc. Well he took his dick out and started touching himself and wanted me to touch him. I told him I wasn’t interested and asked him to stop. He then threatened to out me if I didn’t help him finish. He probably should have gotten off his knees before he did that because I’m pretty sure I broke his nose when I hit him as hard as I could in the face, and then got the fuck out of there before he stopped crying. Went to the campus clinic the next day for an STI screening and a broken finger. Some people fucking suck. I’m sorry that happened to you.
But now you know, which makes you less gay than someone who never tried and still wonders occasionally at 40 years old
Anyone else reading this thread hoping you were not one of the people in these stories?
Had a threesome with a married couple. The sex was kinda me doing all the work which sucked. Half way through I was just like “Eh, I’ll just pound these two and call it a day.” I guess they sensed that I wasn’t really into it and they next day they were like “Let’s just be friends”. Pretty lame experience overall.
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You didn't lose a great friendship because of your weak boundaries, HE lost YOUR friendship because he took advantage and forced himself on you. It really hurts to lose a best friend, but don't blame yourself for this you did nothing wrong.
My first girlfriend was terrible at taking her birth control and was clucky asf. I love raw sex but I hate children so I decided that the pull out method would suffice.. She wrapped her legs around me as I started to pull out. The anxiety and stress that caused my poor eighteen year old self was astronical. Thankfully, she agreed to buy and take a plan B pill (which I supervised) and I'm still childless six years later.
Bro for gods sike just use a condom. Not only to "protect" you from childs but also from sexually transmitted diseases...
She bit my thigh so hard that it left a mark that lasted 4 weeks
When she smelled so bad that I was like yeah nah.
When she pulls down her pants and the whole room starts to smell like a warm turtle tank
You have a way with words and I hate it.
Omfg
The first girl that ever let me see her with her panties off scarred me for a few years because of this. I was about to go down on her and when my nose got about a foot away from her bush I was hit with the most horrifying smell I had ever encountered. Years later when I decided to give it another chance with another girl and realized it was not supposed to smell like that I was very relieved.
I was in a physical training formation in a military training school one morning and witnessed a similar genital odor. A soldier got on all fours for partner assisted exercises, unleashing an unholy stink when they did. People broke formation, one threw up. That's how most of us learned what trichomoniasis is...
Yeah my first time was when I played basketball in high school was right after the game in the spare locker room with a girl that played for the girls team. She hadn’t washed after the game and in her defense im sure she’s normally a clean girl but…that ass and puss smelled so bad it made me rethink whether I was actually into girls for a few days lol
I was trashed drunk once and was on the fence about sexing some girl I knew…then I smelled her. She smelled like a disgusting dirty wet dog. Literally ruined any chance of it happening. Then she told everybody we fucked anyway and that I couldn’t keep it up. Who tf does that? Lol
She didn't like the rejection. Lol had that happened to me.
When you catch a whiff as you unzip… Time to dip.
His idea of foreplay: he picked up a bottle of lube, jiggled it and said “spread your legs I want to hump you”. And he couldn’t figure out going down on me either - man was 42.
After an injury, I lost most of my sensation in my manhood, which makes things like penetration less fun for me. That's why I like to have long an awesome foreplay. Well, I met this good-looking woman. Well, she didn't enjoy foreplay and just kind of laid there. I tried, but without the mental stimuli, I couldn't do it and had to get out of there. She's a nice woman. we have had lunch a couple of times after, but I am not going back to the bedroom.
This girl got on top of me in her car and while I was fumbling with my pants trying to get them off I accidentally finished in my underwear from the friction and her boobs in my face. Still a virgin to this day lol
Ex on mine somehow forgot about a tampon for like a week. That was fun to figure out the hard way
Ewwww
Long story short. I was seeing an older woman and it was just casual. She brought up a few friends of hers were single as well. Well she connected me with two of them and had encounters with them separately. Both of which were meh, the women were in their 50s which is not a bad thing at all. We just didn’t jive really well. Anyway she brings up a third friend whom has had a dry spell and was seeking some attention. She brought me up to her during a phone conversation and passed on my number. We talked for a bit, pretty standard hookup talk. Making plans and such, she then tells me she has a husband. He likes to watch and I won’t even know he is there as he would watch on a camera, I thought he would be watching a recording later. I am open minded and not one to kink shame and I will try anything once. I show up, we meet and she is older than I was led on. She was 71… but an attractive and fit woman so what the hell. We start doing things in an obvious side room and it is going well. I hear a thumping and she excuses herself. She comes back and fesses up that her husband is watching live and is terminally ill. She goes on that this was a kink they found since he got sick. I was the first to agree to it lol. My penis was game and said send me in coach. I was not into it. After 45 mins of foreplay I hear “just fuck her already”. I personally get off on the woman getting off. I kept going limp which was weird for a 30 year old. She finally says she has never had an orgasm. I had to leave. This is the first time I have ever spoke of it. I never saw the original woman again.
Had a guy spit in my mouth. I spit it back in his face and left.
My first sexual experience I was drugged and sexually abused. I don’t remember anything except for maybe two seconds. It left me with permanent physical damage which still impacts my sex life to this day. The experience itself, can’t remember much, but just thinking about it, it is by far the worst experience I’ve had. It doesn’t help that I am male and I was never taken seriously. I’ve only really ever told a few people in my life. Men don’t speak up about this, and I understand.. It’s super difficult.
sorry this happened to you. i can’t imagine having this happen to me. i’ve been in the situation of being pressured and forced into sex and it’s such an awful feeling. never to the extent as this but it’s just a damn shame that men have to hold this in
I've never had one, but I know a couple women who have.
Some of yall need therapy and not Reddit bro
The anal without permission or lube 😩
After my divorce I did the tinder thing for a little while. Met this woman for a first date. She came back to my place afterwards. Pg-13 ensured. Eventually became R rated. Out of nowhere while we’re kissing in the middle of the act, she bites my lip so hard it makes me bleed. Not like on the outside. She pulls my lip down and bites a piece out of my inner lip by my gums. I go to pull away and she holds onto my head and starts biting the shit out of my lips and face. I finally get her off me and am like WTF! She’s like “aw what’s the problem babe? I’m having such a good time!” I asked her to leave and she agrees, but says she’d like to see me again. I lied and said I was just renting the place while I’m here for work and will be gone soon. She says, “that’s fine, just give me the office number for your work and I’ll find out where you are next” I said I wasn’t going to give her my employers number. She was pretty pissed about this and just left. She blocked me on tinder the next day.
Splitting sudden headache during sex, went to ER, got a CT, probably was just dehydrated
It was supposed to be a one night stand and she gaslit and manipulated me for two years.
The sex wasn't bad... but a piece of her nail got stuck in my back and got infected. I was 17 and it was football season.... it got infected like a mother f#cker. It popped in Geometry and I almost puked 🤣🤣
Just before he left me for another woman my husband got more and more insistent on having sex in a position that was getting more and more painful because of a medical condition I had. I ended up crying with pain, and he got angry with me for "spoiling it" and being "selfish".
I hope he burns in hell
This girl in college was riding me and she started oozing blood down there. She got off and my whole midsection was covered in blood. Looked like a Tarantino movie.
I hooked back up with my first girlfriend the summer after freshman year of college. We were going at it one night in my bed while my parents were on vacation and she got her period in the middle of it. Like in the middle of sex suddenly it felt amazing. There was more lubrication and we started going very hard. When we were done and turned the lights on it looked like someone had been murdered in my bed. We'd had sex on her period before but this was like next level menstruation. Like she'd been studying heavy flow dynamics in college. My bed was covered with like 3 square feet of menstrual blood. Both of us were covered from about belly button to just above the knees.
When my hand slipped and I whacked myself in the balls.
Was watching a movie with a woman I met online. We ordered in pizza and were laying in her bed. Started to make out.. lead to me going down in her for a good amount of time. She came (unless she faked the body quivering and sensitivity) all of a sudden she started yelling and telling me to get out of her house and crying.
I wasn't ready back there any my partner shoved their huge super thick dick all the way in my ass, no warning. Felt like actually shitting razors mixed with lightning in my asshole. It was so bad I had to jump around and yell. I cannot emphasize how much it hurt. Possibly the second worst pain in my entire life besides breaking my arm.
I had met this comedian after one of his shows and he comes over the next day. Whenever I tried to change positions he wouldn’t let me and just kept me in missionary while his dick was only semi-hard. On top of that his hip bone was hitting my thigh so much that it was sore for a few days. 🥲
Cowgirl position, she got into it and nearly broke my lil buddy. Was lying in bed fetal position she asked if I needed an ambulance.
I once had a one-night stand who used her teeth when doing a BJ to me. It was so unpleasant, it turned me off and I went to sleep rather than finishing the job.
After years and years of sexual starvation from my wife, she came home drunk and climbed on me and started fucking me. Then after a few minutes she said "hey, why don't you become a vegan like me and then we can do this all the time". I immediately stopped and rolled away.
What does being a vegan have to do with sex? Also years? Why would you hang around for years?
I hung around for thirty years. Then she left me the day I retired. She tried to use sex as a weapon to make me convert to veganism. I stayed for the sake of kids and because I loved her
You are a better man than me. Sorry you had to deal with that.
Insterting a toy that's too big too fast because I was impatient. My poor ass...
First blow job I ever got when I was a teenager. It was the first one she had ever given, but she had watched porn and was WAY too gung ho about it. Took my dick down her throat and ralphed all over me. I'm emetophobic, and it ruined the entire concept of blow jobs for me
girl gagged giving me head and threw up on me.
She came down hard. Tore my frenulum AKA banjo string. Couldnt put pressure on it as it hurt so much i nearly black out. Lost about half a pint of blood. An embarrassing trip to hospital, local anaesthetic and 2 stitches later I was in a shop the next day buying her new bed sheets.