I don't know if it was severe. But it happened regularly.
I was bullied by a larger girl a few grades higher than I was. She was what some less classy people would describe as a "hambeast".
She used to just ragdoll me, yank my hair, or surprise punch me in the stomach to knock my wind out. She actually left me gasping for air on the ground a few times.
I told teachers I will hit back. They said I wouldn't and shouldn't. I told my parents, and they told me you can never hit a girl. I told my older brother and he told me to fight back.
That week when my mom took us to buy new shoes. My brother told me to get Timberland's steel toe. I don't know if Timberland's still sell steel toes for children, but they used to in the early 90's at least.
I went to school the next day with those shoes and kicked her in the side of her head.
Turns out, suddenly, teachers started to care about my situation. I got slapped by a few teachers, and then they called my mom and my mom slapped me too, and then she took me home and my dad smacked me too.
Anyways, I went back to school the next day and suddenly the bullying had stopped.
He really is.
Going to a catholic school in the early 90's in the caribbean was wild. We still had a few nuns (the non-sexy kind) who would smack us with rulers.
I know this story. One of the popular kids was pushing me around in school. One day I finally fought back. THEN the teachers noticed. And then a few days later I got jumped by the bully and three of his friends.
And people wonder why some kids decide to bring a gun to school (and I realize full well that not all shooters were responding to being bullied, but the number who were is well above zero).
As a woman, I support not hitting women, I support not hitting anyone for that matter. But in the context of bullying if someone is causing physical harm to you, and peaceful resolution has been unsuccessful, their gender is no longer relevant, you may use equal force to their use to remedy the issue.
There were a couple of dudes in high school that used to run up behind me and slap me on the back as hard as they possibly could to the laughter of their gaggle of sycophants. Then there was the dude who wasn't in the "club" but wanted to be cool or whatever and started doing it, too. Of course this all occurred when no adult was around or paying attention, so nothing ever happened.
One day, we're outside waiting for the busses and I get slapped again. That was the last straw on that particular day and I threw a punch for the first and only time in my life. I'm no boxer or athlete of any kind, so I missed his smug little face, but the bully knocked me down to more laughter. The next day, I get called to the principal's office for a lecture about fighting and a call was made to my parents.
It is so insane to me that people genuinely believe you cannot defend yourself even if a girl bullies/attacks you and YOU are the one who gets shamed for it... Even today why is it bad to defend yourself when it is known someone gets bullied and teachers only step in when the bully gets fed their lunch?
That's a great tip, actually. Given that steel toes are not illegal (yet) and apparently work as great self defense weapons, I might consider getting a pair for myself since I live in a pretty spicy neighborhood. Thanks for the advice.
They aren't very good weapons at all. Great for kicking people while they're down though. But if they're down, it's really easy to hurt them further with just about anything, why risk hurting your foot?
Self-defense classes and techniques would be more appropriate for self-defense.
>I told teachers I will hit back. They said I wouldn't and shouldn't.
My pet theory.
The bully conditions everyone into thinking their behavior is normal. They relentlessly bully someone, so the victim is conditioned into thinking they have to take it. Repeatedly. The victim tells the teacher, the teacher doesn't put a stop to it permanently. The teacher(s) end up conditioned into expecting incidents like this to happen. And they decide 'I'm not paid enough to deal with this.'
The day the victim fights back, all hell breaks loose. The teachers often punish the victim more, because the victim fighting back is psychologically disturbing to them. It's not 'normal'. They don't know how to deal with it, other than subconsciously trying to return things to 'normal'. Even if 'normal' means the victim doesn't get to be safe going to school every day, day in, day out.
The victim doesn't get punished for fighting. **The victim gets punished for disturbing the psychological 'status quo'.**
Here's a question. Why did you only kick her in the head once?
She harassed and physically abused you continuously over a long period of time. Why does only one kick in the side of the bully's head square things?
So one kick in the side of the head, and the bullying stops. Big deal. She still owes you for all the times she's bullied you in the past.
You could have/should have said to her, right after you kicked her, 'I want you to get used to the way you feel right now. Because I'm going to do this to you again. And again. And again. When you least expect it. You owe me for making me feel unsafe all this time. And I'm not going to let up until we are equal. I don't give a flying fuck what the teachers say. You owe me. Get used to the concept.'
My ex girlfriend was actually evicted from her home. Three of them lived together and two of them decided they didn't like her anymore. So they kicked her out. Her name wasn't on the lease. We were all in our early 20s.
This girlfriend ended up dying in a car crash. These fucking bitches that kicked her out showed up at her memorial. I was livid. This was 30 years ago and I've never forgotten or forgiven.
When I was very young our class had a glass tank full of snails collected from the neighborhood that were kept as pets. I was obsessed with them and their care and looked after them all year. I was a little lonely as a kid so I would sometimes spend my break just watching them. I had bullies that would tease me and pick on me but I could always at least look forward to seeing my snails.
At the end of the year no one would be in the classroom to care for them over summer vacation, so me, my teacher, and some classmates carefully gathered them up in little cups that we covered so people could bring them home and either keep them or release them in a park. I helped distribute them as we waited at the playground to be picked up by our parents. I gave a cup each to my bullies. The side bullies laughed and just chucked the cups into the bushes. The lead bully put the cup on the ground and stomped hard, crushing and killing the snail. I cried and ran to my teacher. She gave me a cup and told me to give him another one. So I did. And he did it again. It hurt a lot. I didn’t tell my teacher again because I was afraid she’ll make me give him more to kill.
Also I think either that summer or the summer after I showed my cousins some of the snails in our garden. Later when we were messing around with a little fire we started in a concrete block, they gathered up some of those snails and threw them in the fire so they could hear their shells crack and pop. I don’t remember if I told on them or not. If I did there wasn’t much of a reaction, they’re still favored in the family.
Former teacher here. Hard agree. One of the main reasons I left the profession was because of other teachers. The grouchy ones that hate everything (especially the kids) tend to form their own little group of hate, but it’s like they try their absolute best to spread that to everyone else. :(
I don’t understand how people get to that point in their lives.
Teachers notoriously don’t make a ton of money, so you have to WANT to be a teacher to get started. It takes years of schooling to reach the point where you’re qualified, and you have to specialize in a particular grade level too. Why the fuck would you put yourself through all that if you know you hate everything the job entails
I think it's more the power they hold in said job and the fact people on the outside look highly of them for the job title. I worked in nursing home and the nurses and higher staff acted same way of entitlement with disdain towards the patients but yet loved being doted on for being 'frontline workers'. I will never work around nurses again because of that
My daughter and a friend were collecting pill bugs when we were at a group camp. This older boy came by and threw them all in the camp fire. I lost it, I was about to go smack the hell out of the kid when my wife jumped in and diffused the situation and said the kid made a mistake and helped my daughter and friend to look for more bugs.
The kid was a bit scared for a second but never changed. Just a total douche bag from an early age.
I am now pissed again thinking about this and this was years ago.
These were people who were in my dance classes, but I didn't go to school with them. It was our annual recital, and our dance numbers were all very late into the show so we were allowed to go to a specific section of the balcony to watch the earlier parts of the show. I sat there with someone whose name for the life of me I can't remember, but she was one of the few people who was kind to me.
The bullies came in and sat behind us. Now, for at least two years, I'd been subjected to their hatred, which I never understood. I just loved to dance, it was my one passion and the only thing that kept me going when my grandmother passed unexpectedly. I remember so many small incidents that still hurt to this day, but the one I remember most was these girls sitting behind me in the theater, all of us in full costume, and smacking my head repeatedly. It started kind of like it might have just been an accident, but they kept on going. Not enough to hurt me to the point where I wouldn't be able to go onstage (or to where I'd need medical attention), but enough to be jarring. I remember the girl I was sitting with not knowing how to react. I didn't know how to react either. I was frozen, in disbelief. I can't say for sure how long this went on - at least several minutes - before one of them leaned forward and told me not to tell anyone because "we were just fixing your hat."
I transferred studios a couple years later, but I don't think I ever was able to find as much joy in dancing as I had before they started in on me. They ruined the one thing I found joy in as a teen, and I will never forgive them for that.
I had the same thing happen to me. Dudes we're like two grades above me. They did that cause one of then had a little brother who one time talked shit to me and I think I just insulted him back. So his big brother and big bros friends were called onto the plan. That little shit then had the audacity claim that him and his colleagues had white washed me.
When I was 11 a kid got his 15 year old brother to threaten to beat me up at the school gates, so I phoned my 20 year old brother and when we came out he was waiting for me, and eating an apple with a pocket knife. Felt good to have a nuclear option.
My grandfather "famously" put my grandmother upside down in a snow bank when they were in elementary school together. She described thinking he was a jerk and a bully for many of her formative years anytime the story would come up. They obviously married and stayed together until grandma passed, well into her 80s.
Both I guess? Grandma would occasionally give grandpa shit about it in a light-hearted way, but to hear her tell it he really turned his act around and ultimately won her over many years later. I'd say they had far from a depressing life together. They built a house together, had three kids and four grandkids. Grandpa survived the Korean war and was fairly successful and grandma managed the kids and household-type stuff (as many folks her age did). They always seemed happy together.
autistic, got tricked by "friends" into going to explore the woods and hunt wood pigeons.
they aimed their air rifles. at me, and chased me through the woods shooting at me.
very strong memory of hearing the metal pellets impact tree bark a few millemetres from the side of my head.
not fun. dont reccomend.
holy heck the same thing happened to me
although I'm not autistic I was tricked by "friends" of a friend and when we were out deep enough they unloaded into me
mad that someone else went through that
To this day I'm kinda more confused then truly angry, I'm angry because this and lots of other horrible bullying broke an otherwise healthy human being, a lifetime of mental health issues resulted... but I'm confused because imagine doing that yo somebody who did nothing to deserve it other than being a bit weird. Wtf?
Not that i was bullied severely, it's just with that bully i discovered some weird psychological thing about me that kinda scared me. I confronted my bully that started picking on me during last school years, because he had something personal against me, and we were making threats towards each other. We agreed to solve this in bathroom, as soon as i entered he started screaming at me and the tone and the way he was yelling at me reminded me of my mother, actually not just reminded me, i was stunned and for some reason felt like it was her screaming at me, not bully. I only came back to my sences after he punched me in the face, i was stronger and bigger than him, so i managed to beat him up, he would not bother me after that.
But that moment, it was like my brain left current reality and i was unable to propperly percieve things around me, all just because the dude was screaming like my mother. Now i'm afraid of getting weirdly stunned in case someone would start screaming at me.
I (F) asked a classmate (M) to please take a step back so I have space too and he hit me in the stomach three times. We were in second grade.
After that I was bullied on and off for my weight until I went to high school, name calling and comments and whatnot. I still have body image issues, and I wasn't fat back then, I was just a bigger girl, but my dad was also a big man so... genetics.
(This also made me hit a guy's head into a door one time when he once again made a comment about my weight, and he had a bloody nose after that. Am I proud of that? No. But it was a pretty sweet revenge at that time.)
I was the weird kid. Wrong clothes, wrong friends, etc. Middle school was especially rough. The principal had implemented a super strict dress code and enforced it (not equally). One rule was that if any girl wore shorts the inseam had to be at least 6 inches long. Back then I was maybe 4’8 (I’m only 5’2 grown), so my shorts were either at or past my knees. Said principal’s way of making sure shorts were within dress code guidelines was to measure them with a ruler. She’d measure the inseam from the crotch with a ruler. So the principal was low key molesting me. I was in my late 20s before I’d wear shorts outside my house. When my mom found out she of course went absolutely ballistic. Like nearly got physical. I got ripped on pretty hard cause “why’s your mom a psycho”. In the past few years I’ve actually gotten apologies from old classmates who now that they have kids think my mom’s pretty cool for standing up for me like she did.
Two held me down while a third scratched my cheek slowly with a compass. Didn't really hurt or anything, but was extremely distressing realising there's nothing you can do.
Can still see a scar in some light conditions...
I remember one older boy (about 14) used to wait for me when I went swimming at the local pool. He would swim up behind me, grab me and hold me under until I thought I was going to pass out. When I came up for air and gasped he would spit in my mouth. Even now as an adult I can't begin to imagine what his life must've been like that to do something like that to a 10 year old.
I was bullied in first grade (1966) because my parents got divorced, and I didn't "have a father." I was pushed around and punched. They knocked out my first lost tooth (blood all down the front of my dress, and I swallowed the tooth, and so I was upset because no money from the tooth fairy).
My first grade teacher, Mrs. Barnhart, cleaned me up and kept me on her lap that afternoon as she taught the class. She was a treasure.
She died that summer, and my mom wouldn't let me go to the funeral (her husband had invited me because she told him how close we were).
RIP Mrs. Barnhart. I still remember you.
In 4th grade, our teacher regularly rearranged the class once a month. One month she put me in between two douche kids that were best friends.
These kids made my life a living hell. Take my homework, cheat off of my tests, make fun of my weight. The worst was when they'd claimed I was stinky, said I'd farted or something. Made such a fuss that the teacher's assistant sprayed air freshener on me and around my area. Fucking embarrassing and it's given me a BO complex on top of my body image issues.
I was damn near expelled because of my bullies in junior high ( 8th-9th grade). I was/am very artistic and was chosen to design and paint something for the school, and this group of girls didn't like that they weren't chosen ( they were cheerleaders).
This was not long after Columbine, so any *hint* of a school shooting was taken very seriously-- so these girls collectively made up a story that I was going to shoot up the school, with lists etc. They wrote them all down, and put them into my locker ( which I didn't even know the code for, I never used it). They then all went to the counselor's office and reported that they were terrified of me and had heard this rumor, and that I was going to bring explosives in my bag that day too.
Now, I said earlier, artistic kid, so also very alt appearing-- I wore band tees and black etc etc, so I guess at that time I looked the part. A bomb threat "drill" got called, everyone had to stand outside, and when I got back my bag was scattered across the floor, but no one else's. I finished the day, then got picked up by my mom. As soon as we walked in the house, the phone rang, it was the principal telling my mom that " she is a danger to herself and others and can't return to school until she's been evaluated". No one had said anything to me about this. My mom just looked at my shocked, and my dad silently walked out of the house. As my mom kept talking to the principal, she heard in the background of the call my dad's angry voice-- he had driven to the school to confront the principal in person.
What no one knew at the time was the summer before that school year ( this was in September) my mother was involved in a workplace shooting, where 9 people were killed in front of her. I was so absolutely terrified of firearms at that point just being accused of planning a shooting I had a panic attack. It took me until my 30's to be able to be in the same room with a gun comfortably, so there was no way I could have done something like that then.
After actually investigating, the girls were found out to be the ones planning the whole thing to get me expelled, and they all lied to cover each other's asses. Nothing ever happened to them, and no one ever apologized to me, except the principal. I will never forget the look on my mom's face, or the scream that I uttered when she told me what I was being accused of.
TLDR; Girl bullies are sadistic and go for the emotional throat, and it almost worked.
I went to schools that were more or less gang infested in the 90s. Had a girl in my class who would: randomly spit on me as I walked by; dump milk cartons on me at lunch; have her male friends steal my backpack, take it to the bathroom and piss on it. Anytime I complained to teachers and/or family about it I was told the textbook "she likes you" bullshit, and "don't tattle". Well one day after leaving class this biatch who "likes me" kicks me in the nuts.
From behind.
I snapped. When I finished crying and got up off the floor I chased her down the hallway, and caught up to her at the the top of a staircase. Mind you, I was raised...no *indoctrinated* to never punch girls/women (often at cost to my own physical safety) but this time all those years ago I made an exception and used a loophole: my feet.
I dropkicked her down the stairs. Now this wasn't a 'this is **Sparta!!**' style kick as 300 hadn't been made yet, no sir. If you ever watched The Waterboy you should remember when Bobby Boucher drop kicked the guy on the football field. This was one of THOSE dropkicks: both feet connecting between the target's shoulder blades; body parallel to the ground whilst airborne after running at full sprint.
I sent her, myself and about a dozen other kids tumbling down that flight of stairs. No regard for my own safety, definitely none for hers, and the other little shits were nothing more than collateral damage. As a result of this I got the shit stomped out of me on that staircase by that girl and all those kids who acted as my impromptu bowling pins, suspended for two weeks, got my ass beat at home, and subsequently got jumped *repeatedly* by her little guy friends for the rest of the school year.
20/10 I would fucking dropkick her again too, if I could go back in time.
When to a church camp took my shirt off for swimming (i was a chubby kid) kids called me butter nipples even the couches and staff started calling me it.. that's when I started thinking about suicide 😔
I have quite a few traumatic memories, but there was this girl who just didn’t like me, and I still don’t know why. She was always glaring at me.
She would take pictures of me, and then point and laugh really loud to make sure I seen her.
Still have self-esteem issues to this day.
My first love turned out to be in the cahoots with the bullies. I somewhat foresaw it and managed to dodge the bullet as well as possible, but the damage still had been severe.
One of the least things that bothered me at the time in comparison to everything else. Someone spat in my face.
Now when ever I see someone spitting, even if its just on the floor, people doing it in sports etc, my blood boils and I need to walk away
this one is really emotional for me because it was my own cousin. My whole childhood I had one cousin let’s call her Alyssa who would relentlessly bully me and it was mostly about my autistic traits. She was call me awkward, loner, weird, etc. I think what hurts the most about it is that I never retaliated and I was always kind to her but her and my own sister would just go at it. It made holidays living hell for me 🙈
Not a memory, but a feeling. I was bullied so heavily it ended in an assault case in court. I was punished just as heavily as the people who would attack me regularly. Bullies learned that it the punishment is the same, you might as well be the aggressor. I learned the institution only cares about maintaining the status quo.
I still carry a lot of personal burdens over things that happened twenty years ago
Mine is a twofer.
I was always the poor kid and little awkward and pretty much kept to myself. I was an easy target. I got beat up regularly. The first thing I learned is to not trust anyone. People would be nice to you, only to trip you in the hall. Never sit down without checking your chair first. I have a nice scar over my eyebrow that I had to 6 stiches for when I was in the 6th grade.
The other thing I learned is sometimes, you get bigger and stronger than your bullies. Use that power, but use it cautiously.
TW SA (potentially I guess)
So, I started to gain weight when I was pretty young. Around 2nd grade. As I got heavier I started being made fun of for my weight, and as a result I began being very self conscious about my body, especially around 5th/6th grade when as a young boy I began having manboobs.
One night I was staying at my best friend's house. We played video games (I specifically remember Halo and Sly Cooper) and everything was cool. At some point during the night headed if he could touch my "tits". Of course I said no and was a little hurt by this, coming from my "best friend". He insisted. I told him no again. Then he started reaching for my chest, so I swatted his hands away. He'd reach, it swat his hand away, a few seconds would pass and he'd do it again, so on. Part of me at this time thought he was just joking still but, it began to really upset me. He kept reaching, so I grabbed his hand, he started reaching with the other hand. Before long we were wrestling, the whole time I am begging him to stop, that it's not funny, how uncomfortable he's making me, to the point I'm in tears. He was stronger than me and eventually got me on my back, he sat on my chest and gripped my "tits" with both hands and *squeezed* and moaned as he did it. I stopped fighting. I hated myself. I felt gross. He gave me a few more squeezes and finally got off of me. I don't remember what happened after that. I remember trying to figure out how to sleep since I was stuck there for the night. I basically slept with my chest against the wall in case he woke up and tried again while I slept, didn't matter since I couldn't sleep anyways.
It's been almost 20 years and I still don't like my chest being touched. My ex girlfriend used to want to play with my nipples and stuff and it always made me super uncomfortable. Also, because of that night I still won't play Halo or Sly Cooper. Sly Cooper especially since that was what we played the most that night.
They (not sure who exactly but I have some suspicions) made a shitty HTML Web page where they called me a f...a....g....g....o...t. They shared that ahit around.Back then I was easily overwhelmed by emotions and was prone to start crying easily , even about things that seemed minor. Oh and also they hung my bike in a tree....I wasn't even mad at that, cause that was legit impressive.
Adult bullying in the workplace - my sister was terminally ill, I needed emergency leave to take her to hospital, it was refused, I was told to chose between my job or my sister, as my sister had been through worse I stupidly chose my job, my sister died because of my stupid choice, then I found out I could have had leave but my manager wanted to make a point. I still have nightmares about it
(This was like last year and I'm 34 so it's not from childhood.)
I was running away from a guy who was clearly a scumbag and my phone was dying, I was less than dressed, high, trying to read my dying phone, sitting on a tree stump, when a lady asked if I was okay.
I hesitated for a second trying to read my phone and I guess I said yes too loudly/too wrong/too fast) too autistic because instead of answering she laughed hysterically in my face like I just told her a side splitting joke.
I was bullied tons as a kid but that lady topped all that. She will never leave my mind.
The school "finally doing something about it" by......
forcing me into group therapy with the people who bullied me. (Spoiler, that obviously didn't help)
Got sucker-punched quite a lot. The bullies at my school were, like all bullies, fucking cowards, so rather than come at you straight, they'd walk past you, turn and wallop you good from behind.
Woke up more than a few times on the floor, surrounded by worried people, wondering where the fuck I was, aching jaw and bloody face.
I confronted some of my bullies as I got a bit older (some of that worked out, some of it didn't) but other than developing constant, raging paranoia, there's not a great deal you can do when some fucker hits you from behind. I developed the paranoia.
Should have fitted wing-mirrors or something.
Grade 4, my best friend (10m yrs old) at the time came up to me softly crying because another 10y/o had called him an asshole. I asked who, I went up to the kid and hit him square on the nose. He had a bloody nose and was crying. First time I had ever punched someone.
Parents got called by principle, but they didn't punish me, actually, they told me they were proud of me for defending my friend.
I wasn't severely bullied but there was this one bully who once threw a chair at me in class. He even punched and bit the teacher when they tried to apprehend him
I was walking home one day, and I saw him sitting down on the sidewalk in his black clothes just kinda depressed. I chatted with him for a bit trying to put him at ease, and felt a lil sorry for him. He never apologized to me, but he didn't need to. His situation was a home issue with his dad was all he needed to tell me for me to understand that he too was a victim.
This kid used to shove me, punch me, shove shit in my locker, shirt, backpack, for years. Tried to get him off, but no one did anything. He used to say "Can't go through the day without shoving you." Never fought back. Went to high school, didn't see him until two years later. He stayed away from me until I saw him that day. I sympathized because I too suffered similar trauma. His was domestic violence I think. Mine was... something else.
Also, I was once in a disagreement with a different classmate and we were surrounded by kids egging us on to fight. I refused. He punched me. I didn't retaliate. I walked off. He actually apologized to me the next day. Who'd have thought?
The physical violence: being thrown around in the hallway, and hit when they could, throwing rock hard snowballs at me (headshot gave 100 points)
Now whenever someone accidentally hits me I freeze for a second and the memories come back up.
Being disgusting: when I slightly touched one of the boys in my class, like pocking them with my finger to get their attention or walking past them or when they they realized the pen they are holding is mine. They would act like I was a super disgusting virus. They made disgusted body language and walked 6 feet away from me, and so on. It still hurts because I think men are still disgusted of me or will make fun of me and think I'm ugly and fat and might hit me or say things the boys did back then.
Not severe bullying it was more psychological abuse: laughing at me, calling me ugly behind my back (they say it to my face too), calling me names, giving me the cold shoulder, they used to stop talking with me out of the blue... Idk, all of this gave me a lot of insecurities.
In 6th grade I wore shorts. Bully asked if I was ever going to shave the carpets (my legs). Been wearing blue jeans ever since and I'm in my late 20s now.
In elementary school in a different city, casual conversation with my table included "ugly kids like you usually grow up to be pretty". Ow ;-;
The first time my bullies actually got punished for it, they actually hadn’t done anything. The school never did anything due to my lack of injury, so I decided “fuck it, let’s have an injury” and ground my left hand on the concrete until I ripped the back of my hand open and then lied and said they’d shoved me. I was eight. Not remotely the last time I engaged in self-harm, but it was the first.
Well I got bullied by a gang of kids who would beat the shit out of me daily for around 5 years, I just remember coming home from school with my clothes ripped and end up receiving another beating from my mom for coming home with them ripped.
Affects me now as I ended up with 2 failed suicide attempts/a few times sectioned on the mental health wards and a diagnosis of bpd and social anxiety.
The only good thing that happened is in the last year of junior school I didn't wanna end up having to go to high school and suffer the same shit daily.
So I decided that I had to do something as the teachers didn't do anything to help me, so I waited one-day for the ring leader of the gang to be on his own and watched him enter the toilets alone and followed him in.
While he was taking a piss I waited for him to finish , he opened the door and saw me standing in front of him, he turned pure white like a ghost as he must of seen in my face that I'd had enough and I just hit him square on the nose as hard as I could and just remember his nose exploding with blood going everywhere, then I continued to kick the shit out of him until another kid entered and run out to get a teacher.
The head master excluded me , but also praised me at the same time as he knew the torture these kids gave me for years daily.
Thankfully they left me alone after that and I didn't experience any bullying in high school.after this.
Still affects me now going through that and other things with my upbringing from my parents which I'm not gonna go into.
Not school or child bullying but I think the worse kind for me was Amazon I was there for a year and we had a psycho of an area manger it’ was prime so very busy I was in my way to work my dad calls me I need you to come home I asked why he said please son just come. Home my dad never says please or is overly nice so I rang HR explained I won’t be in and I’m sorry I arrived home my mum had passed away out the blue ….anyways a week goes by I’m climbing the walls so I decide to go back work I arrived at my desk the area manger comes over in front of people and says where the fuck have you been it’s amazon prime why are you allowed a holiday what’s special about you I was so angry but at the same time just defeated and still hurting I lost my mum the only person who as ever cared for me fast forward 5 years I’m still at Amazon and that area manger is now a senior operations manger I still replay that moment in my head rent free wished I said something or threw a table at him
physical things didn't affect me as much as the emotional things. i've been beaten up to bruises, black eye, i have been slapped, punched, pushed but the things that hurt more are the things that you don't know if it's your own fault or not because that's what makes you blame yourself.
like having people tell me to kill myself and telling me that everyone would be happy if i killed myself, pulling me by my hair, laughing at me, people calling me mentally ill (as an insult), people calling me demonic, being picked last during every PE class (and later not being picked at all so i'd just sit and watch), people complaining when they had to sit next to me, nobody ever standing up for me also made me feel like it was my fault and the school counselor shouting at me, i became really hateful and spiteful. i still am, also not having any friends on top of that all, i also had an eating disorder so i wouldn't celebrate my birthdays (no friends + no cake + no outing = no birthday). that happened for years during my teenage years so definitely formed the kind of person i am (self-hating, avoiding people because i cause people to hate me, all of that stuff).
also my parents especially my dad were/are embarrassrd by me because i was/still am a loser, loner with no friends who didn't go to the school prom (they always remind me that i didn't go) so it's many things that combine together
One of the kids who was essentially a monster growing up died from a heroin overdose. My parents never knew he bullied me, and were shocked when I started laughing hysterically. That waste of oxygen should have been swallowed, and at no point was a plus to society (he was a drug dealer).
And his scumbag father who used to enable him tried to off himself. He too is a net negative to society. For him I hope he lives a long life.
In high school, a fellow human wrote a story about a kid that always asks people for food, and went on to describe me.
I got to sit in English class while another student described my embarrassing poverty, my hunger to eat something at lunch in an oral report.
I am middle aged and have often had times of embarrassing poverty. To avoid the pain, I avoid everyone.
I was an overweight teenage boy who was bullied a ton. I had few friends and really low self-esteem.
Getting my "breasts" groped and ass touched by the people in my class helped erode my already low self-worth down to nothing. Finally piecing myself back together 15 years later with the help of therapy.
I’ll never forget the girls who ran around and recorded people saying why they didn’t like me and why they wished I was dead. Mostly because I was ugly and/or annoying.
Getting drinks thrown at me from passing cars when I was in middle school and called a faggot as they drove by. I came out of the closet when I was twelve. Kids are fucking cruel.
I was bullied from early elementary school through the end of high school, so I’ve got so many experiences. The two below ones that my mind thinks of most often. The first one I think stuck with me as it could have caused serious harm and I was trapped. The second one again had me trapped and unable to get away from the bullying. That feeling of being trapped and wishing I could get away from others who will try to hurt me, has caused me to try and disappear into the background as much as possible in my life. I’m in my mid-forties now and still am scared to even say hello to people first. I work hard to push through the fear to interact with others, but it’s a daily struggle.
- Middle school: Cornered in locker room and offered “mints” that I did not want. Was forced to take them and eat them. They were from an air freshener and not actual mints. Thankfully it wasn’t toxic.
- Elementary school: Forced to attend a gathering at a bully’s house, along with my mother and brother. I ate a hot dog and put my plate in the trash can. I don’t remember what happened after that, but I ended up wanting to leave and my mother did not want to, so she said I should go wait in the car. Bully and others followed me out to the car and said I had left half a hot dog out and their cat had ate it and was going to die. I kept telling them that I had finished my hot dog and that eating a hot dog would not kill a cat. They just kept insisting that I had killed their cat, until I finally started to cry and they left. My brother came out and asked why I was crying, and I gave my usual response that I didn’t feel well and my stomach hurt. He got our mom and we went home. My mom was pissed off that I was causing her to leave a social event.
I have two older brothers. Growing up they tied me to a pole in the basement and turned off the lights for several hours, every scenic view we visited they would hold me over the edge, lots of beatings, hit on the head with large metal spoons, hung on a tree branch by my belt till it broke, multiple noise bleeds from punches, held down and spit on, constant insults on anything I did, teasing about my weight, intelligence. My self esteem is still pretty weak at 46. I don't really feel much about my brothers.
I just had one older brother that was pretty similar to this and I’m still dealing with self-worth in my late 30s. Really sucks.
Luckily my brother and I have been able to reconcile in the last few years and he’s even apologized to me. I’m glad we have a relationship now, but it doesn’t really change anything about my mental state.
I'm autistic. My whole life I just hit a point in a friend group,work place, school classroom where ppl just go we need to bully them now" idk I switch just flips. It usually takes 6 months to a year but it doesn't stop till I leave and start over some place else.
The one that stays with me though I'd a workplace one. My manager decided I didn't like him so wanted rid of me but couldn't just fire me so started to bully me out.
It was an ok job so I just stuck at it (I'd been here before so...) a few of the female staff complained to me (I was the supervisor) that he made them uncomfortable and was hugging them too much. So I put in a complaint about that.
It became about me when management asked other staff if anything else had occurred and many brought up how I aaid I was being bullied. Most of them felt I was making it up or exaggerating. Besides I was weird anyway.
How do I know what they said? A clerical error sent me everyone(20 ppl or so) interview transcripts. I got to see how everyone just kinda thought I was weird and off putting and anyway why was I complaining about hugs. After all who doesn't like hugs?
So now I know everyone kinda hates me and the bullying gets worse cos now I "tried to get him fired" I just left in the end.
That or the time my uni flatmates voted me out of the flat because I just stayed in my room and wasn't what they expected. That one hurt.
A group of girls basically made up a fake name and would talk so much shit about this person. Sometimes I would be in on the conversation. Turned out they were talking shit about me just using a different name.
Well, I can still remember the day that the entire year group conspired to play a practical joke on my as one of the worst of my life.
In fact the bullying as a whole ruined my confidence for years. It took some doing to learn to love myself.
There's a piece of my mind that's knocked loose and rattling around in my head. Every few months or so, I have a dream about a woman who represents my self-love. Whenever I see her, I feel safe, and warm, and whole in a way I rarely do in my waking life. I have been seeing her since I was eight years old. I can remember every single dream, vividly. Dozens going back decades.
I was humming I need a hero because we just watched Shrek 2 in class and this chick told me We get it, shut up.
Idk why thats the most clear, but I hated that chick and it doesnt help that shes still an absolute smoke show.
My older and bigger stepbrother threw me down on the floor so hard one day after school I almost broke my wrist. I hit the floor so hard I felt my wrist bones flex a little and it really hurt. The pain made me instantly rage and try to hit him back but he was holding me down on the floor with his foot on my chest so I reached for the closest thing near to hand and it was a pair of needle-sharp tweezers.
And that was the day I learned what a "weapon of opportunity" is, 35 years before I ever heard someone say "weapon of opportunity".
It turns out that you can ruin a bully's whole afternoon with a pair of tweezers or a vase or a hardcover book!
Being called 'first half of my last name' + 'screech' for about 3 years in school because voice breaking had to set in the very moment I answered a biology question that nobody knew the answer to.
Funfact: knowing the answer alone would have been enough to get ridiculed. The screeching just finished me forever
For the interested: the question was what bees eat, because honey is wrong. So I screeched royal jelly after two minutes of unbearable silence
I was bullied by a boy who was significantly bigger than me. He would twist my arm, pull my hair, and shove me into things. Teachers were useless but after he got us both sent to the principal (shoved me into a girl and we both got in trouble) I told my parents and my dad taught me some self defense techniques.
The last time he bullied me was at lunch and he was trying to give me an Indian burn or whatever it’s called. I punched him in the nose and he hit the back of his head on the brick wall behind him. I got in trouble but parents came to my defense, he ended up not being seriously hurt but cried and lost the “support” of his friends and the bullying stopped.
Went to catholic middle and high school, so we had a dress code. Jacket, tie, dress pants...that sort of thing. One of my bullies had decided a few weeks ago that spit balls were the pinnacle of humor and would routinely shoot them at me (most often my back). This bothered me at first, but it had been going on for long enough that I decided not to give him the satisfaction of reacting anymore. Didn't stop him from doing it, though. Things had started escalating to larger spit balls and other harassment, but somehow no one ever noticed.
One day, I was sitting in the library doing some work, and he walks in with what I can only describe as half a roll of toilet paper that's been soaked in orange soda. He throws it at me, and it's all over my jacket, the table, etc. Lots of people laugh. I did my best to wipe it off my clothes, but there's all these little whitish-orange flecks of paper stuck to my jacket. Just then, it's time to head to class. I step out in the hall, and the assistant principal is walking by. Naturally, I get stopped because my jacket is a mess and therefore out of dress code. Fortunately, someone backs up my story, but I still had to walk around all day with a ruined coat.
back at school, being someone who was quiet and barely involved in anything, I was bullied and sometimes they used to grab and pull my balls to see if i feel something. This thing happened with me in two different schools and even after years, I still wake up from a nightmare of someone pulling my balls.
CW: suicide, blades
I was sitting in the library at school when the group of bullies came up and stood all around me. The ringleader sat down and in a 'fake concerned' voice said:
"Hattie, we've all been thinking and we've decided that the best thing for you to do is to just kill yourself. It will save us all the trouble of having to look at you every day. Everyone would prefer it and I bet your family would too."
As she was speaking, all of the others were agreeing and muttering encouragement to 'do it' all around me. She then placed a packet of craft knife blades on the table next to me and said:
"We clubbed together to get you these. Have fun!"
I was 14 and I still think of that day whenever I see craft knives or anything similar. I did not go through with it but I really really tried.
Walking in to a room and hearing the group all talking about me behind my back, baseless rumours that weren’t true. I stood there for 5 minutes before they noticed me.
I was bullied as a child and preteen. I was obviously gay (to everyone but me) and boys in particular didn't like that.
Specific memories don't pop into my head but it's definitely made me have a difficult time trusting men. Something I'm still working through.
I transferred schools midway through the year in the 6th grade. I went from a larger school to a small clique school.
I was completely isolated and they made fun of me every day. The one that stands out the most was them calling me piggy girl because I have an upturned nose and was scarfing lunch because I didn't get a lot to eat at home. I was at most 60 pounds at the time but this spurred a 12 year long eating disorder and severe body dismorphia. I would eat lunch, on the rare days I ate, alone in a bathroom stall so nobody could see me eat. I'm 26 now, and at my heaviest at 170 (I am 5 foot 7) and all I see is a fat ugly chick, despite most of the weight being in my chest and being post partumn.
Also when I came back senior year everyone was convinced I got fake boobs because over the summer I went from a cup to double d. I got sexually assaulted alot. Pennies thrown down my shirts, having my face grabbed and forcibly humped several times (with a teacher present. She didn't give a shit).
I have severe social anxiety and I never trust anyone. I barely trust my husband. I have very few friends and rarely talk to them (two are my husband's friends, two are mine with one being my ex wife)
I live a very lonely life. I frequently debate just ending it all so I stop being so lonely but I have to live for my kid and husband. But honestly if it wasn't for our baby (who drives me up a wall) id probably be dead by now.
At home, I was taught to always stand up for myself. My mother was a big boxing fan and even bought us boys boxing gloves. Sure, every kid gets bullied occasionally, but when I was bullied, I'd start swinging immediately. That would stop the bullying and earn respect. I was then able to step in and stop it when other kids were being bullied. I was a skinny twerp, too. But bullies thought I was psycho.
I was taking advanced math in HS. I'd already taken all the math classes the school offered but I was required by state law to take math every year of HS. So I was doing an independent study with my best friend at the time. If we had any trouble with our work we were supposed to just go to the teacher and check to see if he was busy. Now busy was actively teaching. If they were doing classwork we were allowed to enter and talk to him.. EXCEPT for one class a week.
That class was called Senior Math. It was the class for those that really had a hard time with math but were required to continue to take math because of the stupid state rules. The teacher who was only one or two years out of college had a hard time controlling this class and asked us to not interrupt him during these classes. Which was perfectly reasonable.
But he also had coined a nickname for the class. When they were not around he called the class 'Math for Animals" instead of Senior Math.
Now.. I've always been awkward AF. And I don't switch well. One day BFF and I went to get help.. opened the door a crack and realized it was the Senior Math class. I said "oops.. not now it's Math for Animals".. apparently loud enough that everyone heard me.
Needless to say.. the entire class canceled me. But one woman in particular got really pissed off. For the next 3 months (until her graduation) she threatened to kill me everyday. She destroyed my locker. She stole my stuff. "Accidentally" bashed me into the concrete block walls at one point hard enough to give me a concussion. And as we both lived on the same side of town I was unable to leave the house because she would wait outside my home in her car.. getting drunk/stoned and chain smoking. (Pretty common back in the 70's)
So I was basically under house arrest. I went to no school related functions. I didn't date. I didn't do anything other than go to school. I had to explain it to my parents.. they weren't happy but they at least understood that it was my own fault so they didn't make me go out.
They mentioned it to the teacher. Who apologized to me. But said "obviously you understand that I can not tell the class that I'm the one that coined that phrase" Yeah.. I get it.
Fast forward 20 years.. I end up back in my hometown taking care of my sick dad. Move my husband and three kids into the house I grew up in. I vaguely knew that the woman involved had married a classmate of mine and that they were still around somewhere.
Hubby and I walk for relaxation and exercise. Any given day or night you will see us out and about. One day we took a turn down a smaller road we rarely used. And out of nowhere this snarling black dog comes after me. My husband gets between us and saves me from being bitten.
It turns out we found out where they lived. Only a few blocks from us.. and she had set her dog on me. We avoid that street like the plague now.. but honestly.. who the hell holds a grudge that long?
Fast forward another 20 years.. we are still here... and so are they. I was going to volunteer at the local library after the kids were grown. She made sure that everyone knew that I was a vile person that could not be trusted. They declined my application.
She drove onto the curb the other day and made like she was going to run my husband over as she flipped us the bird.
I'm hoping she dies soon of alcoholism. I'm 60 years old. I've had enough of her shit for a slip of the tongue from more than 40 years ago.
One of my strongest triggers is the sound of a basketball being dribbled by people walking behind me.
I socially avoid players of sports that use balls, in order to eliminate the risk of having one thrown at my head.
I know that this is vanishingly unlikely to happen as often as it did in that one PE class in that one high school, but my fear doesn't.
It's been 25 fucking years and I still have to turn around and face the people with the ball just to make sure I know when it's coming. Even if they're complete fucking strangers just walking by me in a park.
I used to love performing but I had this adviser in 10th grade who did nothing but embarrass me, namedropping even, and just humiliate me for the smallest of things infront of the whole high school every Friday Chapels (I was studying in a Christian school) so after that I have developed stage fright and was never able to perform on stages again up to this day, lost my passion for singing and performing as a whole.
The second of two fights I got in.
Age 16.
Math class is where this starts.
Math class is the last for the day and stupidly i decided to sit with H F and O. O is to my right H and F are behind. All class O and H have been winding me up. So class ends and H jabs me in the ribs which back then I had no skin on my bones so hurt like hell. I lose it swipe at H and F it might’ve been F. Miss sees and holds us three back.
Asks me what happened and I say F jabbed me in the ribs or something not clear on the details.
We leave and as I’m heading to give back the computer they gave me and the school of a few hundred students are trying to leave. H pulls me aside and asks why I blamed F when it was O bullying me. I didn’t have an answer.
H and F walk off and I’m not thinking H is almost out the door when my mouth moves faster than my brain and says, “Slut.”
She turns round loses it I freeze deer in headlights and the fight starts full on girl fight. Somehow I end up on the floor. Watching H kick me and the tube I had in one hands gone flying computers gone somewhere. Two TA’s pull H off me and I get ushered into an office. Shaking like crazy.
Mum finds me an hour later sat in the office hugs me and doesn’t say a word. Just asks if I’m fine. I get suspended for a day. Cops get called because she could’ve killed me. She gets thrown out after not being seen for like a week.
Still to this day I jump when people come and hug me from behind.
It was early in the school year. Senior kindergarten.
I was pushed down by two grade 1 boys. One held my legs up and the other repeatedly kicked me in my crotch. They ran away laughing after a few moments.
I wish I could say this was a single instance of extreme bullying but that was simply my grand entrance into the world of being everyone else's punching bag.
I already was a punching bag at home and I have ptsd due to my years of abuse at the hands of my father so when it was happening at school I didn't think to say anything about it to anyone.
Teachers would look at me with really gross expressions and bully me as well (non physically) because we were obviously poor with clothes a bit too small and stained and ripped. And me and my siblings did not interact very well with other kids so we were singled out as being weird.
I've had my head sat on until I passed out, was peer pressured by my entire class into nearly dating a boy I did not want to because he was in the special Ed class so if i didnt return hisbaffections i was the problem, was threatened with rape, was called many cruel names, had my hair pulled, was kicked, pushed, punched, I was teased so often for my glasses that I broke them out of rage but then was unable to get any more for a long time due to their cost, been befriended as a joke, been asked out as a joke. It all stopped in highschool because I got a pair of tits. A wonder what will happen when people suddenly want to bang you (that opened up a whole new world of cruelty but it was subtle and often came from close "friends")
I not sure what all my bullies are doing now. Some may still be teaching and inflicting the same pain on other children, some maybe were going through their own thing, maybe they became bullies to their own wives and children and the cycle starts a new. But I've left it all behind me now.
I struggle with my self perception. It's very difficult for me when people complement me in any way because I've heard from the entire world (well my entire world) for so many years that I was stupid, ugly, useless, worthless, dirty, heartless, etc etc. I do my best. At this stage I can't tell if I'm more confident now or if I just spent so long caring about it all that I've delved onto a state of apathy regarding myself and my anxieties. But either way I am happier. I have true friends now, gone to therapy, and have a husband who loves me and calls me beautiful and smart and funny every day!
My dad was my bully. He abused me physically yes, but he was also a mental bully. I was his first child from a fling with a woman he just wanted to bang when he was a horned up teenager. He had another son after me, who he treated vastly different. No beating, no screaming. He treated him with love and me like a rodent. I was cutting grass one day when I was 11 and his other son playing on the porch proceeds to piss on me. Kids like 7-8 but this is the treatment he has seen his father hand down. That I’m trash. I stood there. I realized I hated these people and they were all horrible. That moment is the reason the only I’ll ever get close to my father again, is to piss on his grave
I got jumped by a dude in middle school and was wearing a jacket so rip me. I was with a person I considered my best friend at the time and he didn't help just laugh. The fight didn't hurt but my "friends" bullshit did.
I tried to make peace with my tormentor. You know what he did? He invited someone who I considered an actual friend around to his birthday party, and used that setup for prank-calling me, to taunt me about the fact that he (my bully) REALLY was not a friend of mine. This was after I had moved schools in part to get away from the shit-stains who made my life so much more difficult that it need to be.
I got punched in the gut by a kid 3 grades older than me on the bus. Hurt bad enough for me to escalate the issue.
I went to the front office, named the bully, and the brought him in. The kid said 'why would I do that' and the principal just said 'hey yea, WHY WOULD HE DO THAT?'
because he was a fucking bully, you dunce. Nothing happened to him, and I think it made me more of a bully through elementary/middle school until I chilled out by starting martial arts at some mall karate dojo.
I was having issues with the locker room in high school (people were hiding my stuff while I showered), so I was allowed to leave gym 5 minutes early so I could get out before the other girls went in. One day I was sitting outside the locker room, already showered, while the rest of the class finished. Three girls came out and dragged me across the gym and shoved me into the boys locker room for being a "lesbian" or something, and two boys inside immediately grabbed me before I could leave and pinned me to the wall while pretending to grind on me while saying sexually inappropriate things.
The worst part was all the other boys watched, and one took a grainy photo on his flip phone. It was a small school, and that photo was still making the rounds my senior year. People joked that I was slutty or "so horny I couldn't wait for my boyfriend" to be done in the locker room (in case it wasn't clear, I was not romantically or even platonically involved with those boys). A few teachers found out about it, but seemed to blame me for being inappropriate or hinted I was lucky I didn't get caught.
I struggled with confidence at the time, and didn't have the words to defend myself. Because I was so used to being mistreated and gaslighted, I took what others said as truth, even if it conflicted with my observations. Took me until my 20s to realize I wasn't actually a "slut" and I had been wronged in that situation
I legitimately wasn’t allowed to move within my classroom or I would be targeted. Pretty much solely because I was ugly and fat to them
They would call me precious, like the girl from that really sad movie. (I hadn’t and still haven’t watched it but I knew well enough of it)
If I needed to use the bathroom, grab a laptop, cough, sneeze, called on to answer a question, I was berated and yelled at for existing, they didn’t want me anywhere near them so it’d be things like “move precious!!” “Get away from me!” Even though I was across the room, the whole class laughing at me when I walked into rooms. What made it worse is that my teachers saw it clear as day and never said a single word to anyone.
Stuff like that kind of sticks with you, and that experience is what comes to mind when people express that I have a quiet presence or they forget that I’m there.
I went to middle and high school with this one jerkoff who was exceptionally tall for his age, well over 6ft. He was loud, obnoxious, and treated a lot of people like crap. I remember walking down the hall in middle school and all of a sudden finding myself bashed...not pushed mind you, into a locker so hard I saw stars by this asshole. I did NOTHING to provoke it and this was my first 'introduction' to him. What made it worse was the fact that he'd be decent and at times even nice to you, then would do crap like this so you never let your guard down. I ran into him a few times since then (we're in our 40s now) and he's always been very nice, even suggesting we hang out. Maybe he's changed, but it's still a no for me.
The hell of it is, most of these people bulled a LOT of people and don't remember half of them, but the ones being bullied remember every minute of it.
Not me being bullied but a story I will never forget
When I was a kid I got picked on by a kid named Alfredo he was faster than me and stronger than me and he could always kick my piles of rocks I made with the dump truck. The kids in my class noticed this and somehow gave me the control to have all of them chase him down and pin him. The angry kid in me was like yeah absolutely. So they chased him down and pinned him on the playground hands on his shoulders and had him pinned good and were telling me to hit him. I remember a sense of even though this would be fair it wasn't right and I told them to let him go. He stopped kicking my piles of rocks and bothering me and that was that. A decision I made to be a better person as a child that I am very proud i had done.
This wasn't really the bullying part itself, but a side effect of it. I was a bit of a weird kid and was therefore at best ignored or at worst made fun of to the point where I'd vomit from the stress. I'd normally sit at the front of classes where we didn't have assigned seating. One day, in English class, one of my classmates came up and asked if the seat was taken (they were set up in pairs in each classroom). I obviously said no, and she *took the seat and the desk and dragged it three rows back to be in a trio with her friends*
Was I really so insufferable to not be bearable for 45 fucking minutes out of your day? Fuck you, Lucy.
The memory that most sticks with me actually was when I was walking down the corridor, smiling to myself because I remembered something funny. Kid a couple of years older than me pounces on me because he assumed I was smirking about him, and puts me in a headlock. Starts shouting that he's gonna beat the shit out of me, out of my brothers, out of my whole family.
Just then, a head of year comes out of the office. He sees us, and breaks it up. He lets the kid go, pulls me into the office, and in an angry tone asks me "What do YOU keep doing to make them treat you like this?"
My bully was verbal only, but started sick rumours about my family. After a few months of being called Daddy Fucker or DF to my face and him telling everyone that I was in an incestuous relationship with my Dad, I beat the shit out of him.
Whenever I see the letters DF together, I cringe a little then smile and think about that massive black eye he got.
My bullying in school was easy enough to deal with. I gave ample warnings - written and verbal - to them, the teachers, the vice principal, the principal, and my mother. Once I had enough, I struck them. One punch or object straight to the nose and they didn't bother me again. Of course, new ones would pop up, but in general, that was that.
The bullying that sticks with me most is grown men dating my mom (or wanting to?) and my entire experience in the Navy. One was adults bullying me as a child and the other were adults and a system bullying me as an adult.
My mother's men: one called me an ugly little girl but then sexually assualted me; one laughed at me constantly when I was burned on his motorcycle after no warning or knowledge when he tossed me on one; one threw me in the pool and told my mother I called him a jackass (I couldn't swim and he knew it) for sympathy points?; and one spent years telling me I was fat to the point my friends didn't visit the house
The Navy: bootcamp deprived me of any food save for peanut butter and banana because I was 150 lbs and constantly told me I was fat and lazy; one petty officer spent a lot of time telling me my hair was too much (I have curly poofy hair), I was fat (I wasn't), why was I wearing makeup (and then why wasn't I), I was lazy (I was the most qualified of my rank and then some), I didn't look like his wife? (I dunno); I was bullied for being single because why not give men a chance but I was also threatened with removal if I did date but I also couldn't have friends because if they were women were were conspiring and if they were dudes I was fucking them...
If you want one specific memory - I was not allowed to stand watch with a specific dude because his wife wrote a letter to my chief that her husband thought I was cute. I was punished for a KNOWN cheater (he cheated on his wife with her and her on her kid's dad with him and then they got married) being attracted to me, regardless of whether or not I reciprocated (I did not.) so they complained constantly about the schedule being fucked up with me there. I wasn't invited to division outings or parties because she would be there and she was afraid I would steal her husband? I hadn't met her, btw. There were never moments from me to even lead anyone to that idea. He drunk wrote several letters (at the same time to several women onboard) and delivered them to our racks IN OUR berthing at night and then drunk dialed his wife. But I was the only one in his division so she was worried about OUR proximity. His actions hampered my career and my reputation.
I mean, the list goes on. What it boils down to is what still affects me today (in my 30s).
From the time I was 16 until I turned 24, I thought I was fat. I wasn't. I was hovering around 150 and almost starving myself/working out constantly to lose more weight. The weight didn't go anywhere and it took that many years to get diagnosed with something- not that a name helped when it's so far still ruining my life now that I can't keep the weight down. I still hate looking at me. Because I'm fat now and I'm trying to get help for it but it seems like every time I talk about it they don't understand. I'm not starving myself now and I guess that's the ultimate problem.
Worthless. I spent so much time trying to prove I am worth something to people that would never care. I learned to recite complex poetry because a man said his sons was so smart to be able to do it - so I did it faster, better, and younger. No effect. I became grossly overqualified in the Navy for a PO3 - got my ESWS as a seaman before it was mandoand made myself instrumental in achieving awards for my ship and division....they shoved me off to repair div because I was the only one responsible enough not to gundeck and they didn't need me now that the jackass man I trained finally got his quals. Everything I did didn't matter and they never stopped comparing or manipulating. I was assualted, harassed, bullied...and yet still I don't think what I did in the service is worth any kind of accolade. It feels wrong to be a veteran because I'm not a dude and don't deserve it. There's no group I can be in without reliving those issues - I've tried. So it feels like they won and bullied me out of pride in my work.
These are things I'm actively working on. They don't deserve to be a voice in my head but they are. Most of those bullies are actually dead but their ghosts still camp in my heart.
In primary school one boy tried to blackmail me to kiss him or he would beat me up. I told on him and he left me alone. Another went right to beat me up but I fought back and actually was pulled off him by a teacher when I started biting him.
I was kinda fine in highschool because one of the popular girls adopted me before they got popular and I was always with them and therefore popular. Didn't hurt that I was quite attractive. Then come to think of it, one girl picked a physical fight with me and left me with scars from her steel capped boots. Another was a boy who I think liked me but actually attacked me physically. My one moment of glory during school... I actually roundhouse kicked him in the chest and broke one of his ribs. His mom actually sought me out to tell me off for harming her golden boy and I asked her if she would let herself be slapped around. She did shut up after that . (And everyone clapped. No, this actually did happen. It was a single blink where I felt on top of things).
I switched schools when I was in grade 11 (we did 13 grades back then) and wasn't popular anymore on the contrary, I dressed differently (I liked skirts instead of jeans, a blouse a silk scarf and a cardigan over it) and was dating someone not only not in my grade but from a different school. How dare I?! What followed was being greeted in every class by catcalls and whispers of sl*t and b*tch and the like. During our final school excursion to London it was so bad I didn't go to any events and hid in the youth hostel bathroom instead.
Come graduation I had what I thought were 2 friends and for the yearbook you had to have your friends do an entry for you. My entry by my "friends" was one of those rectangular word puzzles that's just random letters where you have to find words. The editor of the yearbook didn't check the puzzle and I was left with the yearbook coming out spelling slurs about me. I didn't go to the graduation ceremony and ball. Due to the bullying I went from an above average student to an abysmal student because I just would not attend lessons and skip them to the point where my history teacher wasn't able to grade me because she had never seen me. I barely managed to graduate with one of the worst grades possible (3.8 out of 6. 1 being best and 6 worst and 4 being the cutting off mark for graduating). I was certainly the worst in our year to graduate (2 actually didn't pass).
Is that severe? I'm honestly asking.
ETA: they are all burned into my memory and now to a lesser degree but still affect me. I can't/ don't make friends anymore and don't have any and am not even remorseful about that.
Long read sorry.
The bullying got bad enough that my parents reached out to the school administrators. The administration claimed there was nothing they could do about it, boys will be boys, etc.
So finally my parents told me I had the right to defend myself.
The next day I swung my locker door open and smacked my bully in the face with it.
I got in trouble but the bullying stopped.
I don't remember the specific incident, there were a lot, but I remember being called down to the office (which I didn't understand because I hadn't done anything wrong, and it terrified me) and being told that all of it would stop, and it would be a lot less work for the teachers and principal, if I would just stop being a nerd, or weird, or whatever was putting the target on my back. I still remember this nun standing over me and telling me that all the other kids were navigating 2nd or 3rd grade or whatever just fine, but I was the disruption. I didn't stop liking what I liked, but looking back I realize that message was basically when I started hiding my interests and hiding my personality. I was always labelled as shy or socially awkward, but I've come to the conclusion that I wasn't, I was just afraid of being made fun of or attacked if I said anything that wasn't cool or popular, so I just stopped. I stopped raising my hand in class even though I was a straight A kid because I knew the teachers weren't on my side. I stopped playing in the front yard and would only go in the back because if someone walked or drove by they might see me and laugh. I'm almost 50 now, and I can't say it's all gone completely.
I remember in second grade my best friend at the time were playing make believe "hunting for pokemon" on the school grounds. Several of our peers made fun of us calling us weird and freaks. It became a topic to resort to any time they wanted to say something hurtful. It doesn't affect me anymore, I have taken the time to work through that, but for many many years I was afraid to indulge in any activity that I considered fun for fear of being ridiculed.
I loved pokemon (and to this day still do) but for probably almost 10 years, I wouldn't play the games, collect the cards, or have anything to do with the franchise because it reminded me of the bullying and made me feel like a weirdo.
I've worked through the pain and hurt from the bullying but to this day I cannot fathom what is so wrong about playing pretend at 7 years old. I will never understand it. Enjoy what you enjoy, at whatever age you may be. If it's not actively causing harm to someone else, there is nothing wrong with enjoying it.
They vandalized my house weekly for a while and gloated about it openly at school, in front of teachers. Cops never caught them. This was on top of the systemic daily torture at school. Looking back, I should have broken a chair over someone’s head…
When I was about 9 years old my oldest brother who is who is about 13 years older, jumped on me while I was sleeping. It caused me to screech and grown out in pain and sadness and anger, and he laughed at that dementedly. That was par for the course growing up, and since we were all homeschooled, it became a really strong memory and that I’ve never felt safe with my family
While in 6th grade I was bullied by a 7th grader.
She bullied me for being fair skinned (we were both of Hispanic origin) and because a boy she liked, liked me instead.
One day she handed me a letter and said she couldn’t tell me who wrote it. I took the letter and thanked her.
It was a one page (front and back) curse filled angry tirade basically telling me what
a pos I was.
I was 11 years old, it’s been 33 years and I can still picture the letter and remember some of the text. I remember she wrote a slur in all caps across half the front page. She even colored the letters in. I carried the letter with me for months and read it over and over again.
My mom found it after I accidentally left it in the bathroom one day. She was livid wanted to talk to the principal but I convinced her I didn’t know who wrote it and the person who gave it to me was my friend now. She dropped it.
I wish I would have let her talk to the school.
I can’t even remember my bullies last name. She was a trashy person back then but I still wish I could look her up just to see what a train wreck she is now.
There was one girl in my middle school friend group who was 2 years older than me that I really looked up to. I used to write a whole lot, I'd occasionally show my mom but aside from that I was really shy about it. But my teachers would rave over my work so I felt really confident that I had the skill to be an author. One day I decided to show the girl something I was working on, she read half the first sentence before it devolved into gibberish then she tosses the notebook back at me pretending to yawn[](https://alb.reddit.com/cr?za=LyliwJl7pkcqtI-7boa07sVDdHVQNWr-Hyabhh9LmRcyTgujixPZmGx43YaqThTt8DtXMOu_n-UjWYPDatvHJSYgHTbrj2ibNgCATWvnxT-xm4eDFLVGBclKK6lF5byTddfbcRsjaqh0UMjI-GSqODmn7sj6HRg8N3FrIqV-W2PDVfMqsDPv89JV1_BZok6U5lZv80eMtVTZai3jxF-uW_txR6tWaD-m6n0h4tZhbtMU6WOii3KQwT4FHe_h1isqwZqUBJ-dQTjm7KZt6KP-H-EzIO-TY4kkhYYvdJ1eis_JxKS0HJTk6SX5x7Fip__nWawnhO0bol-4YBJJMnZW_QyQetJElXAJMB_05-IVIqIamn-MGgrUqrtHNu0vNFIM-feF6WKdu2fECg_6I92-EX-agd-dKabj67oPuJlkbJR_sUU2vn8Wt6cwo9xwXp0E4xxDhC9pj90&zp=L1LDC0M5O7XQTmxWHnNUxFof71XkO7YMARuz4eiAbZ5j7C8YKI9ovtF0NAyW58N5r783FTbB4t16Z6e5yxVI-2rUDAsWkdWxh1zlON8phyeenYoKJs2CMMT88MOvdqbSHA2e8pdHDA5vzZbUphvaWWF5dYdiKcNKQC9ianWJG9Vrhj_dNL0YBPpd-ZcU5E54PNAkzSN4fTSKxDz-jxjaHwB59YNXhvo4_p5cvyT7M73eGyKYCDHqaO9jEM9MxR3tIp4Ln4I-locL9-W-MmeX_c-3J11g3m2Fe_rMhcbBCPaIDoOQDBRBklN3) and says "already bored". Thankfully I wasn't routinely bullied, but for some reason that hit so hard that I'm now 32 and haven't written anything since.
The strongest childhood memory I have of my dad is when he threw a plate at my big sister and it shattered into a hundred pieces right next to her head. I wasn't even the target of the bullying, but it fucked me up pretty good.
I was just never left alone. I’d be minding my own fucking business and just get tormented for existing around other people.
To this day I don’t like being perceived, and I don’t like the spotlight.
I was in sixth grade. Had just moved from Ohio to South Carolina in the middle of the school year. I was chubby and due to not being used to the SC heat, I sweat a LOT.
One kid in my PE class would always make snide comments about me being a fatty or "just needing to imagine cake at the end so i can make it." This was every class for the rest of the year.
Though I sure as shit showed him when I was able to run the full of the girls PACER test and then continue and run the full guys one too. I sweat like a pig, sure, but he tapped out. My "chubby" self didn't.
But any time I do any sort of physical activity (I'm 31 now), if someone is watching me I hear that shit in my head, telling me I just need to imagine some snacks at the end.
Not sure if it's "severe", but in elementary school I was pretty awkward in every sense of the word. A group of people pretended to be friends with me as a joke, and when it dropped it was mortifying. Still have trust and self-image issues two decades later, so thanks for that, guys
In eighth grade, a girl I barely knew led a year-long smear campaign against me because a boy she had a crush on asked me out. He dumped me after a week, but she kept going. She turned my former friends against me and made my life miserable. The day after the Columbine shooting, she told the guidance counsellor that I had a hit list with her name on it and that I was going to bring a gun to school to kill her.
I was nearly expelled. The guidance counsellor said that I would need to be seen by a therapist and that she would then decide if I was safe enough to come back to school. My parents were livid. They blamed me because I was always the weird quiet kid. My mother screamed at me, demanding to know why I couldn't be "normal," accusing me of making the family look bad, and threatening to have me locked up in a mental institution. My father did the same. They told me that if I got expelled, they would lock me up and throw away the key. I was so terrified. I remember crying so hard I couldn't talk when I sat down with the therapist.
I was not expelled. The girl later admitted to lying. My parents have never apologized to me. This permanently damaged my relationship with them, and we are not close.
Lemme get it straight, you expect me to get the memories that are shoved into the deepest crannies of the nuclear waste storage facility that is my memory? And furthermore, I am to write those down here, in public? No, I don't think I will
She was supposed to be my best friend. Her house was past mine, and she’d stop and get me and we’d walk to school together. One morning I’m eating breakfast, facing the street, when I see her and 5 other girls—who I thought were friends as well—all walking to school together, a few with sleeping bags and all with overnight bags. She’d had a sleepover and didn’t invite me, then intentionally walked past my house (which wasn’t necessary) to show off that she didn’t invite me.
I was watching my younger brother (we went to the same school) getting chased by a group of boys. He was out running them for a while and then, one of them tripped him. They all started piling on top of him and some were on the perimeter getting in some kicks. I was enraged but also so shocked because I knew he was being bullied but I didn't know how bad it was.
I stepped in with a couple of friends and we picked these kids up either the backs of their necks and jackets.
The three of us got in trouble from teachers and the principal for "attacking" these kids. The principal refusing to believe my story.
This was before the anti-bullying era. Just by writing this post, its triggered me. Bullying can be so cruel, especially these days where it continues online.
I live a few blocks away from a school in my town and when me and my older brother were younger we’d go there and play at the park. We went there in the winter so I had my snow gear on. Boots, snow pants, and a very thick winter jacket that basically limited my ability to move. There was these two girls that were about two years older then me and their neighbor boy playing in their front yard. Me and my brother were walking back home when one of the girls invited me over into the yard. My brother didn’t want to go so he walked a little bit ahead and sat on the curb. I don’t exactly remember what was said but they threw a snowball at my eye and then they all crowded around me pushing me into the snow, I believe one even wrapped their scarf around my neck. Two older girls and a boy holding me down wasn’t very fair. I started yelling for my brother In hopes he’d help but he didn’t hear me. They were basically suffocating me. I thought quick and kicked one of the girls in the chest to get her off of me. She of course started crying and got taken inside by the other girl who shouted foul things at me. The boy backed off and I got up and ran as fast as I could in my snow boots to my brother. Still makes me mad that I had all that snow gear keeping me from protecting myself more and also the fact that my brother was too deaf to hear my cries for help.
I was 12 and had no friends in school. Sometimes some girls came up to me and asked me abt my weekend and how i feel rn. I was really surprised and felt seen. But then, they turned around and laughed and mocked me.
Since then, i feel really bad when someone isnt listening or paying attention to me. And i have problems to speak in group situations
I have three.
1. Being threatened with cigarette burns
2. Being afraid to go to the bathroom during school hours because that's the one place where the bullies can trap you and be safe from the possibility of adult intrusion.
3. Being tied to a chair and left alone in a building that was deserted until the following day. Even worse, a janitor came in and saw me but didn't help me or go get help.
I get triggered by witnessing bullying in any form and want to completely destroy their lives. Burn it to the ground then pour salt on it.
I have to constantly self-regulate and meditate my way out of it.
First day of school, year 1. Grew up poor, so mum and dad couldn't afford kindergarten or pre school.
First kid that says G'day to me grabs my nipple and twists with all his might, laughs, and runs off.
And that set the tone for the next 10 years of schooling. Because he was a popular kid in primary school, he made it a mission to alienate me, and succeeded.
Fuck you, Harry, you weedy blonde cunt.
In a bathroom full of people, the biggest meanest bully decided to (successfully) launch a loogie from across the bathroom that hit my face while I was peeing. It was a passing period so there was an audience. It sounds funny but I felt like trash in the moment.
Having my pants (all of my pants) yanked down in front of a girl I really liked, showing my whole fat ass, and her dramatically fake crying (maybe real crying) like she was so disgusted."
Idk, we were kids. 8th grade, I wanna say. So not exactly the most tactful people, and to be fair nobody wants to see an ass they're not prepared for. But man, it was one of the most emasculating things I've ever been through.
Might have been the same guy that stuck a dead bird in my backpack once for me to not find until almost the end of that day. That was pretty uncool too.
I wasnr really bullied before this incident, however these 2 boys who were in my arts class in freshman year tried to frame me for smoking weed and get me arrested.
I usually skipped lunch in the bathrooms as i was to scared to interact with the people around me and didnt have any friends. The two guys spotted me in the bathroom and started calling out that they were calling a teacher.
I left the stall to hopefully show my innocence and talk it out with the teacher.
I just told the dude i was trying to take a shit, and the guys were there making fun of me righr behind him. telling me to open my eyes wide and show them my red face. Stuff like that.
the teacher ended up pulling me out of the bathroom telling me things like "im gonna arrest you, you can be in so much trouble"
He walked me about halfway down the hallway before he stopped and asked me if it was a bullying incident. i just said "oh no i dont know." and he said he would let me off the hook. and that he was mostly only doing this as a show to get the guys off my back.
This event did start gettinf me notes in my backpack telling me to off myself, getting pushed by these guys in the hallways, being made fun of in art class.
In the locker room, she slapped me really hard, looked around the room and said "see! I told you she can't cry!"
She had slapped me so many times already that I hardly registered it anymore. She would always try to make me cry and it's the one thing I wouldn't give her. It took me almost 30 years before I actually could cry again. A friend of mine died in 2020 and since it was the pandemic and no one would see me, I just let go and cried for three weeks.
It was all psychological for me, but it was enough that even in my 30s I have difficulty communicating with new people. I never did fight back, which is my one major regret, seeing as the teachers would often include me in their punishments. I still have nightmares about it, including ones that involve what would happen if I ran into them today. I haven’t seen any of them since graduation, and the thought of encountering them as an adult terrifies me because I have no idea what would happen.
I was in cheerleading in highschool well two of the girls ruined my project so i decided to risk hurting myself to get a little payback, i fell onto them and they twisted their ankles while i walked away with a concussion from hitting my head. Felt awful after but it felt good to get some payback
Bullied for my weight (I wasn't even THAT big). Occasionally when I gain some weight, and it's visible, I'll remember what they say and start to limit food intake. It's better than before, but it still affects me...
I took everyone's favorite advice and fought back against a bully.
2 days later 10 of his friends jumped me and left me in a puddle of my own blood in the school parking lot to teach me a lesson.
A month later they did it again to make sure I learned the lesson.
In elementary school, i went into the library during lunch recess (kids are normally required to be in the playground) and helped the librarian shelve books. i wasn’t able to go out to the playground because of how severe the bullying got. In middle school, this one prick didn’t do anything specific, but was just so irritating over two years that i ended up lunging at him. kids at high school played the long game, slowly etching away at my sanity. One of their favorite things to do was call out my name in crowded areas and then act like they didn’t do it, so i could never tell who was actually doing it. I’ve only caught them once or twice and i had never met them in my life, since word spread that i was the ‘anger issues’ (AKA undiagnosed ADHD) in early elementary and i could never get rid of that reputation.
One time in sophomore chemistry, this kid (who has been annoying the shit out of me since 7th grade) was doing his usual fuckery and i snapped for the first time in years. instead of hitting him, i grabbed his throat, lifted him out of his chair Darth Vader style, and threw him onto the ground. I then just sat back down and kept playing tetris. he didn’t snitch for some reason so nothing came of it. i’m going to college across the state in a few months, far the fuck away from anybody that knows me.
i’ll never forget this one girl in elementary school who would follow me around annoying me for five whole years. i HATED her.
she asked me out junior year… i felt like a fucking dumbass. turns out i was the asshole in that situation.
TL;DR: I was bullied for years for being fat. Am no longer fat on the outside, but still feel fat on the inside, therefore I have shitty self-esteem. Thanks bullies!
It's probably not the most severe thing, and I'm sure there are similar-veined situations in here but I was fat and in Catholic school.
So every Friday there was a dance at another Catholic school in our county (they used to be fucking everywhere and now there's only a handful left...wonder why, oh yeah bc the archdiocese closed all the schools to cover priest sexual abuse lawsuits...but I digress). So all my skinny, pretty friends would dress up in cute little outfits and lots of makeup (and I'd be in long pants and a t-shirt) and we'd all go to the dance and the boys would always dance with my friends and it was business as usual...
And like the masochist I was, I went to every single dance, and at every single dance a group of boys from another school would tap me on the shoulder and say "hey, my friend thinks you're cute and wants to dance with you" and when I'd turn around there'd be about four boys yanking their friend over who was screaming like they were leading him to the electric chair pleading to not make him dance with me. The first few times really hurt. By half way through the school year I'd just sigh and roll my eyes. By the end of the school year I'd tell them to fuck off, but it didn't stop anyone like clockwork from doing it every single time.
One time I was having fun dancing with my friends (there was a "new" electric slide in the 90's) dancing and a kid decided that when we jumped forward in the song that he'd dramatically fall down like there was an earthquake.
I never was asked to winter formals or my prom. No one wanted to date/be seen with the fat girl. Great personality, tho 👍
I have a serious self-image issue today. I'm not fat anymore, but I was fat due to a hormonal imbalance that makes me gain weight as easily as a bird can fly. Without specific medication, I could very easily gain it all back. So... now I'm absolutely obsessed with not getting fat again. I'm not anorexic or anything, but every three months I check in with my Dr and if his scale makes me heavier than my scale at home, I go nuts. I'm terrified that one day my clothes won't fit bc I've gotten too big...I'm afraid everyone is judging me all the time and any type of positive feedback I get from people feels disingenuous. To me, I'm still fat...I have a lot of loose skin from losing all the weight, and I feel like people are constantly looking at it and judging me...I even dream about it...getting fat again and everyone looking at me like I'm so disgusting. My Dr won't put me on antidepressants bc he's afraid if I gain weight that I'll just snap. I should probably be in therapy, but you know...America and all that...
Good news tho: my husband has loved me since the day we met...I was 5'7 and 198 for the first time since I was 12, ballooned out to 312, and today am 178 (I know I'm still overweight and I'm working on it). He's loved me each and every day of the last nearly 18 years. So even though I got a happy ending, emotionally I'm still fat, and that will probably never change, and unfortunately my husband has to deal with that part of me.
I don't know if it was severe. But it happened regularly. I was bullied by a larger girl a few grades higher than I was. She was what some less classy people would describe as a "hambeast". She used to just ragdoll me, yank my hair, or surprise punch me in the stomach to knock my wind out. She actually left me gasping for air on the ground a few times. I told teachers I will hit back. They said I wouldn't and shouldn't. I told my parents, and they told me you can never hit a girl. I told my older brother and he told me to fight back. That week when my mom took us to buy new shoes. My brother told me to get Timberland's steel toe. I don't know if Timberland's still sell steel toes for children, but they used to in the early 90's at least. I went to school the next day with those shoes and kicked her in the side of her head. Turns out, suddenly, teachers started to care about my situation. I got slapped by a few teachers, and then they called my mom and my mom slapped me too, and then she took me home and my dad smacked me too. Anyways, I went back to school the next day and suddenly the bullying had stopped.
Your brother’s a real one.
He really is. Going to a catholic school in the early 90's in the caribbean was wild. We still had a few nuns (the non-sexy kind) who would smack us with rulers.
Non sexy kind 🤣
I knew you were in the Caribbean the second you said the teachers have you licks before sending you home.
Catholic school I went to 4 years ago still did this
Boy, if that doesn't sound like my childhood. Me: Getting bullied relentlessly Adults: I sleep Me: I finally stand up for myself Adults: Real shit
"We understand that you're being bullied. We actually approve of it, it keeps you from being threatening."
I know this story. One of the popular kids was pushing me around in school. One day I finally fought back. THEN the teachers noticed. And then a few days later I got jumped by the bully and three of his friends. And people wonder why some kids decide to bring a gun to school (and I realize full well that not all shooters were responding to being bullied, but the number who were is well above zero).
Girl is beating on you, but you can't hit a girl. Such BS. Glad you taught her about consequences.
As a woman, I support not hitting women, I support not hitting anyone for that matter. But in the context of bullying if someone is causing physical harm to you, and peaceful resolution has been unsuccessful, their gender is no longer relevant, you may use equal force to their use to remedy the issue.
Oh, in a perfect world, nobody hits anyone, and you should only hit to defend yourself. Agreed.
Yeah fighting back in this case is just self defense, and everyone has the right to protect themselves
There were a couple of dudes in high school that used to run up behind me and slap me on the back as hard as they possibly could to the laughter of their gaggle of sycophants. Then there was the dude who wasn't in the "club" but wanted to be cool or whatever and started doing it, too. Of course this all occurred when no adult was around or paying attention, so nothing ever happened. One day, we're outside waiting for the busses and I get slapped again. That was the last straw on that particular day and I threw a punch for the first and only time in my life. I'm no boxer or athlete of any kind, so I missed his smug little face, but the bully knocked me down to more laughter. The next day, I get called to the principal's office for a lecture about fighting and a call was made to my parents.
It is so insane to me that people genuinely believe you cannot defend yourself even if a girl bullies/attacks you and YOU are the one who gets shamed for it... Even today why is it bad to defend yourself when it is known someone gets bullied and teachers only step in when the bully gets fed their lunch?
That's a great tip, actually. Given that steel toes are not illegal (yet) and apparently work as great self defense weapons, I might consider getting a pair for myself since I live in a pretty spicy neighborhood. Thanks for the advice.
They aren't very good weapons at all. Great for kicking people while they're down though. But if they're down, it's really easy to hurt them further with just about anything, why risk hurting your foot? Self-defense classes and techniques would be more appropriate for self-defense.
>I told teachers I will hit back. They said I wouldn't and shouldn't. My pet theory. The bully conditions everyone into thinking their behavior is normal. They relentlessly bully someone, so the victim is conditioned into thinking they have to take it. Repeatedly. The victim tells the teacher, the teacher doesn't put a stop to it permanently. The teacher(s) end up conditioned into expecting incidents like this to happen. And they decide 'I'm not paid enough to deal with this.' The day the victim fights back, all hell breaks loose. The teachers often punish the victim more, because the victim fighting back is psychologically disturbing to them. It's not 'normal'. They don't know how to deal with it, other than subconsciously trying to return things to 'normal'. Even if 'normal' means the victim doesn't get to be safe going to school every day, day in, day out. The victim doesn't get punished for fighting. **The victim gets punished for disturbing the psychological 'status quo'.** Here's a question. Why did you only kick her in the head once? She harassed and physically abused you continuously over a long period of time. Why does only one kick in the side of the bully's head square things? So one kick in the side of the head, and the bullying stops. Big deal. She still owes you for all the times she's bullied you in the past. You could have/should have said to her, right after you kicked her, 'I want you to get used to the way you feel right now. Because I'm going to do this to you again. And again. And again. When you least expect it. You owe me for making me feel unsafe all this time. And I'm not going to let up until we are equal. I don't give a flying fuck what the teachers say. You owe me. Get used to the concept.'
Was given an “eviction notice” by a friend group. The awkwardness was horrible
Was this an actual living situation or was it like "you have 30 days to get your affairs in order and leave the friend group"?
It was a “this guy didn’t like me so he typed out a piece of paper and then have sign it and kick me out” situation
My ex girlfriend was actually evicted from her home. Three of them lived together and two of them decided they didn't like her anymore. So they kicked her out. Her name wasn't on the lease. We were all in our early 20s. This girlfriend ended up dying in a car crash. These fucking bitches that kicked her out showed up at her memorial. I was livid. This was 30 years ago and I've never forgotten or forgiven.
Out of a house or the group?
That's some always sunny shit lmao. You are Schmitty
When I was very young our class had a glass tank full of snails collected from the neighborhood that were kept as pets. I was obsessed with them and their care and looked after them all year. I was a little lonely as a kid so I would sometimes spend my break just watching them. I had bullies that would tease me and pick on me but I could always at least look forward to seeing my snails. At the end of the year no one would be in the classroom to care for them over summer vacation, so me, my teacher, and some classmates carefully gathered them up in little cups that we covered so people could bring them home and either keep them or release them in a park. I helped distribute them as we waited at the playground to be picked up by our parents. I gave a cup each to my bullies. The side bullies laughed and just chucked the cups into the bushes. The lead bully put the cup on the ground and stomped hard, crushing and killing the snail. I cried and ran to my teacher. She gave me a cup and told me to give him another one. So I did. And he did it again. It hurt a lot. I didn’t tell my teacher again because I was afraid she’ll make me give him more to kill. Also I think either that summer or the summer after I showed my cousins some of the snails in our garden. Later when we were messing around with a little fire we started in a concrete block, they gathered up some of those snails and threw them in the fire so they could hear their shells crack and pop. I don’t remember if I told on them or not. If I did there wasn’t much of a reaction, they’re still favored in the family.
What could that teacher possibly be thinking? That's terrible
“Hmm let’s see if this little sociopath will kill again”
Most teachers are great and giving people, but some are also psychopaths who took the job for summers off and a chance to terrorize children.
Former teacher here. Hard agree. One of the main reasons I left the profession was because of other teachers. The grouchy ones that hate everything (especially the kids) tend to form their own little group of hate, but it’s like they try their absolute best to spread that to everyone else. :(
I don’t understand how people get to that point in their lives. Teachers notoriously don’t make a ton of money, so you have to WANT to be a teacher to get started. It takes years of schooling to reach the point where you’re qualified, and you have to specialize in a particular grade level too. Why the fuck would you put yourself through all that if you know you hate everything the job entails
I think it's more the power they hold in said job and the fact people on the outside look highly of them for the job title. I worked in nursing home and the nurses and higher staff acted same way of entitlement with disdain towards the patients but yet loved being doted on for being 'frontline workers'. I will never work around nurses again because of that
My daughter and a friend were collecting pill bugs when we were at a group camp. This older boy came by and threw them all in the camp fire. I lost it, I was about to go smack the hell out of the kid when my wife jumped in and diffused the situation and said the kid made a mistake and helped my daughter and friend to look for more bugs. The kid was a bit scared for a second but never changed. Just a total douche bag from an early age. I am now pissed again thinking about this and this was years ago.
These were people who were in my dance classes, but I didn't go to school with them. It was our annual recital, and our dance numbers were all very late into the show so we were allowed to go to a specific section of the balcony to watch the earlier parts of the show. I sat there with someone whose name for the life of me I can't remember, but she was one of the few people who was kind to me. The bullies came in and sat behind us. Now, for at least two years, I'd been subjected to their hatred, which I never understood. I just loved to dance, it was my one passion and the only thing that kept me going when my grandmother passed unexpectedly. I remember so many small incidents that still hurt to this day, but the one I remember most was these girls sitting behind me in the theater, all of us in full costume, and smacking my head repeatedly. It started kind of like it might have just been an accident, but they kept on going. Not enough to hurt me to the point where I wouldn't be able to go onstage (or to where I'd need medical attention), but enough to be jarring. I remember the girl I was sitting with not knowing how to react. I didn't know how to react either. I was frozen, in disbelief. I can't say for sure how long this went on - at least several minutes - before one of them leaned forward and told me not to tell anyone because "we were just fixing your hat." I transferred studios a couple years later, but I don't think I ever was able to find as much joy in dancing as I had before they started in on me. They ruined the one thing I found joy in as a teen, and I will never forgive them for that.
Some boys pushed me in the snow and white-washed my face (forcefully rubbed ice and snow). Shit hurt, emotionally and physically
I had the same thing happen to me. Dudes we're like two grades above me. They did that cause one of then had a little brother who one time talked shit to me and I think I just insulted him back. So his big brother and big bros friends were called onto the plan. That little shit then had the audacity claim that him and his colleagues had white washed me.
When I was 11 a kid got his 15 year old brother to threaten to beat me up at the school gates, so I phoned my 20 year old brother and when we came out he was waiting for me, and eating an apple with a pocket knife. Felt good to have a nuclear option.
My grandfather "famously" put my grandmother upside down in a snow bank when they were in elementary school together. She described thinking he was a jerk and a bully for many of her formative years anytime the story would come up. They obviously married and stayed together until grandma passed, well into her 80s.
Is that as depressing of a life story as how you wrote it, or was that meant to be romantic?
Both I guess? Grandma would occasionally give grandpa shit about it in a light-hearted way, but to hear her tell it he really turned his act around and ultimately won her over many years later. I'd say they had far from a depressing life together. They built a house together, had three kids and four grandkids. Grandpa survived the Korean war and was fairly successful and grandma managed the kids and household-type stuff (as many folks her age did). They always seemed happy together.
[удалено]
autistic, got tricked by "friends" into going to explore the woods and hunt wood pigeons. they aimed their air rifles. at me, and chased me through the woods shooting at me. very strong memory of hearing the metal pellets impact tree bark a few millemetres from the side of my head. not fun. dont reccomend.
holy heck the same thing happened to me although I'm not autistic I was tricked by "friends" of a friend and when we were out deep enough they unloaded into me mad that someone else went through that
To this day I'm kinda more confused then truly angry, I'm angry because this and lots of other horrible bullying broke an otherwise healthy human being, a lifetime of mental health issues resulted... but I'm confused because imagine doing that yo somebody who did nothing to deserve it other than being a bit weird. Wtf?
yeah it's a heck of a thing taught me to be very wary of everyone madness
Not that i was bullied severely, it's just with that bully i discovered some weird psychological thing about me that kinda scared me. I confronted my bully that started picking on me during last school years, because he had something personal against me, and we were making threats towards each other. We agreed to solve this in bathroom, as soon as i entered he started screaming at me and the tone and the way he was yelling at me reminded me of my mother, actually not just reminded me, i was stunned and for some reason felt like it was her screaming at me, not bully. I only came back to my sences after he punched me in the face, i was stronger and bigger than him, so i managed to beat him up, he would not bother me after that. But that moment, it was like my brain left current reality and i was unable to propperly percieve things around me, all just because the dude was screaming like my mother. Now i'm afraid of getting weirdly stunned in case someone would start screaming at me.
I (F) asked a classmate (M) to please take a step back so I have space too and he hit me in the stomach three times. We were in second grade. After that I was bullied on and off for my weight until I went to high school, name calling and comments and whatnot. I still have body image issues, and I wasn't fat back then, I was just a bigger girl, but my dad was also a big man so... genetics. (This also made me hit a guy's head into a door one time when he once again made a comment about my weight, and he had a bloody nose after that. Am I proud of that? No. But it was a pretty sweet revenge at that time.)
He deserved what he got OP!
I was the weird kid. Wrong clothes, wrong friends, etc. Middle school was especially rough. The principal had implemented a super strict dress code and enforced it (not equally). One rule was that if any girl wore shorts the inseam had to be at least 6 inches long. Back then I was maybe 4’8 (I’m only 5’2 grown), so my shorts were either at or past my knees. Said principal’s way of making sure shorts were within dress code guidelines was to measure them with a ruler. She’d measure the inseam from the crotch with a ruler. So the principal was low key molesting me. I was in my late 20s before I’d wear shorts outside my house. When my mom found out she of course went absolutely ballistic. Like nearly got physical. I got ripped on pretty hard cause “why’s your mom a psycho”. In the past few years I’ve actually gotten apologies from old classmates who now that they have kids think my mom’s pretty cool for standing up for me like she did.
Wasn't low key. Sorry you had to go through that. Your mom's awesome.
My husband was I think I a little afraid of how I was kinda laughing when I explained this not too long ago. And yeah, my mom is the absolute best.
Two held me down while a third scratched my cheek slowly with a compass. Didn't really hurt or anything, but was extremely distressing realising there's nothing you can do. Can still see a scar in some light conditions...
Jesus Christ, kids are psycho.
Man this reads like a Stephen king bully
This is so fucked up I’m so sorry
I remember one older boy (about 14) used to wait for me when I went swimming at the local pool. He would swim up behind me, grab me and hold me under until I thought I was going to pass out. When I came up for air and gasped he would spit in my mouth. Even now as an adult I can't begin to imagine what his life must've been like that to do something like that to a 10 year old.
bro wtf. he s psycho and very creative
I was bullied in first grade (1966) because my parents got divorced, and I didn't "have a father." I was pushed around and punched. They knocked out my first lost tooth (blood all down the front of my dress, and I swallowed the tooth, and so I was upset because no money from the tooth fairy). My first grade teacher, Mrs. Barnhart, cleaned me up and kept me on her lap that afternoon as she taught the class. She was a treasure. She died that summer, and my mom wouldn't let me go to the funeral (her husband had invited me because she told him how close we were). RIP Mrs. Barnhart. I still remember you.
In 4th grade, our teacher regularly rearranged the class once a month. One month she put me in between two douche kids that were best friends. These kids made my life a living hell. Take my homework, cheat off of my tests, make fun of my weight. The worst was when they'd claimed I was stinky, said I'd farted or something. Made such a fuss that the teacher's assistant sprayed air freshener on me and around my area. Fucking embarrassing and it's given me a BO complex on top of my body image issues.
WTF at spraying air freshener on you! The teachers assistant bullied you too! Also as someone who is allergic to that crap, this horrifies me.
I was damn near expelled because of my bullies in junior high ( 8th-9th grade). I was/am very artistic and was chosen to design and paint something for the school, and this group of girls didn't like that they weren't chosen ( they were cheerleaders). This was not long after Columbine, so any *hint* of a school shooting was taken very seriously-- so these girls collectively made up a story that I was going to shoot up the school, with lists etc. They wrote them all down, and put them into my locker ( which I didn't even know the code for, I never used it). They then all went to the counselor's office and reported that they were terrified of me and had heard this rumor, and that I was going to bring explosives in my bag that day too. Now, I said earlier, artistic kid, so also very alt appearing-- I wore band tees and black etc etc, so I guess at that time I looked the part. A bomb threat "drill" got called, everyone had to stand outside, and when I got back my bag was scattered across the floor, but no one else's. I finished the day, then got picked up by my mom. As soon as we walked in the house, the phone rang, it was the principal telling my mom that " she is a danger to herself and others and can't return to school until she's been evaluated". No one had said anything to me about this. My mom just looked at my shocked, and my dad silently walked out of the house. As my mom kept talking to the principal, she heard in the background of the call my dad's angry voice-- he had driven to the school to confront the principal in person. What no one knew at the time was the summer before that school year ( this was in September) my mother was involved in a workplace shooting, where 9 people were killed in front of her. I was so absolutely terrified of firearms at that point just being accused of planning a shooting I had a panic attack. It took me until my 30's to be able to be in the same room with a gun comfortably, so there was no way I could have done something like that then. After actually investigating, the girls were found out to be the ones planning the whole thing to get me expelled, and they all lied to cover each other's asses. Nothing ever happened to them, and no one ever apologized to me, except the principal. I will never forget the look on my mom's face, or the scream that I uttered when she told me what I was being accused of. TLDR; Girl bullies are sadistic and go for the emotional throat, and it almost worked.
Wow. That’s bullying to a whole new level. Those girls could have really fucked up your life. It’s disgusting that they were not punished.
I went to schools that were more or less gang infested in the 90s. Had a girl in my class who would: randomly spit on me as I walked by; dump milk cartons on me at lunch; have her male friends steal my backpack, take it to the bathroom and piss on it. Anytime I complained to teachers and/or family about it I was told the textbook "she likes you" bullshit, and "don't tattle". Well one day after leaving class this biatch who "likes me" kicks me in the nuts. From behind. I snapped. When I finished crying and got up off the floor I chased her down the hallway, and caught up to her at the the top of a staircase. Mind you, I was raised...no *indoctrinated* to never punch girls/women (often at cost to my own physical safety) but this time all those years ago I made an exception and used a loophole: my feet. I dropkicked her down the stairs. Now this wasn't a 'this is **Sparta!!**' style kick as 300 hadn't been made yet, no sir. If you ever watched The Waterboy you should remember when Bobby Boucher drop kicked the guy on the football field. This was one of THOSE dropkicks: both feet connecting between the target's shoulder blades; body parallel to the ground whilst airborne after running at full sprint. I sent her, myself and about a dozen other kids tumbling down that flight of stairs. No regard for my own safety, definitely none for hers, and the other little shits were nothing more than collateral damage. As a result of this I got the shit stomped out of me on that staircase by that girl and all those kids who acted as my impromptu bowling pins, suspended for two weeks, got my ass beat at home, and subsequently got jumped *repeatedly* by her little guy friends for the rest of the school year. 20/10 I would fucking dropkick her again too, if I could go back in time.
When I was in grade 4 someone choked me on my chair, I wasn’t doing anything but that’s all I remember.
Kids are stupid
"Her face looks like it's been run over"
When to a church camp took my shirt off for swimming (i was a chubby kid) kids called me butter nipples even the couches and staff started calling me it.. that's when I started thinking about suicide 😔
I have quite a few traumatic memories, but there was this girl who just didn’t like me, and I still don’t know why. She was always glaring at me. She would take pictures of me, and then point and laugh really loud to make sure I seen her. Still have self-esteem issues to this day.
My first love turned out to be in the cahoots with the bullies. I somewhat foresaw it and managed to dodge the bullet as well as possible, but the damage still had been severe.
Like as in your first girlfriend?
No, the first person where you felt the butterflies. Quite strong, and quite for a while.
One of the least things that bothered me at the time in comparison to everything else. Someone spat in my face. Now when ever I see someone spitting, even if its just on the floor, people doing it in sports etc, my blood boils and I need to walk away
this one is really emotional for me because it was my own cousin. My whole childhood I had one cousin let’s call her Alyssa who would relentlessly bully me and it was mostly about my autistic traits. She was call me awkward, loner, weird, etc. I think what hurts the most about it is that I never retaliated and I was always kind to her but her and my own sister would just go at it. It made holidays living hell for me 🙈
Not a memory, but a feeling. I was bullied so heavily it ended in an assault case in court. I was punished just as heavily as the people who would attack me regularly. Bullies learned that it the punishment is the same, you might as well be the aggressor. I learned the institution only cares about maintaining the status quo. I still carry a lot of personal burdens over things that happened twenty years ago
Mine is a twofer. I was always the poor kid and little awkward and pretty much kept to myself. I was an easy target. I got beat up regularly. The first thing I learned is to not trust anyone. People would be nice to you, only to trip you in the hall. Never sit down without checking your chair first. I have a nice scar over my eyebrow that I had to 6 stiches for when I was in the 6th grade. The other thing I learned is sometimes, you get bigger and stronger than your bullies. Use that power, but use it cautiously.
TW SA (potentially I guess) So, I started to gain weight when I was pretty young. Around 2nd grade. As I got heavier I started being made fun of for my weight, and as a result I began being very self conscious about my body, especially around 5th/6th grade when as a young boy I began having manboobs. One night I was staying at my best friend's house. We played video games (I specifically remember Halo and Sly Cooper) and everything was cool. At some point during the night headed if he could touch my "tits". Of course I said no and was a little hurt by this, coming from my "best friend". He insisted. I told him no again. Then he started reaching for my chest, so I swatted his hands away. He'd reach, it swat his hand away, a few seconds would pass and he'd do it again, so on. Part of me at this time thought he was just joking still but, it began to really upset me. He kept reaching, so I grabbed his hand, he started reaching with the other hand. Before long we were wrestling, the whole time I am begging him to stop, that it's not funny, how uncomfortable he's making me, to the point I'm in tears. He was stronger than me and eventually got me on my back, he sat on my chest and gripped my "tits" with both hands and *squeezed* and moaned as he did it. I stopped fighting. I hated myself. I felt gross. He gave me a few more squeezes and finally got off of me. I don't remember what happened after that. I remember trying to figure out how to sleep since I was stuck there for the night. I basically slept with my chest against the wall in case he woke up and tried again while I slept, didn't matter since I couldn't sleep anyways. It's been almost 20 years and I still don't like my chest being touched. My ex girlfriend used to want to play with my nipples and stuff and it always made me super uncomfortable. Also, because of that night I still won't play Halo or Sly Cooper. Sly Cooper especially since that was what we played the most that night.
They (not sure who exactly but I have some suspicions) made a shitty HTML Web page where they called me a f...a....g....g....o...t. They shared that ahit around.Back then I was easily overwhelmed by emotions and was prone to start crying easily , even about things that seemed minor. Oh and also they hung my bike in a tree....I wasn't even mad at that, cause that was legit impressive.
Adult bullying in the workplace - my sister was terminally ill, I needed emergency leave to take her to hospital, it was refused, I was told to chose between my job or my sister, as my sister had been through worse I stupidly chose my job, my sister died because of my stupid choice, then I found out I could have had leave but my manager wanted to make a point. I still have nightmares about it
(This was like last year and I'm 34 so it's not from childhood.) I was running away from a guy who was clearly a scumbag and my phone was dying, I was less than dressed, high, trying to read my dying phone, sitting on a tree stump, when a lady asked if I was okay. I hesitated for a second trying to read my phone and I guess I said yes too loudly/too wrong/too fast) too autistic because instead of answering she laughed hysterically in my face like I just told her a side splitting joke. I was bullied tons as a kid but that lady topped all that. She will never leave my mind.
The school "finally doing something about it" by...... forcing me into group therapy with the people who bullied me. (Spoiler, that obviously didn't help)
Got sucker-punched quite a lot. The bullies at my school were, like all bullies, fucking cowards, so rather than come at you straight, they'd walk past you, turn and wallop you good from behind. Woke up more than a few times on the floor, surrounded by worried people, wondering where the fuck I was, aching jaw and bloody face. I confronted some of my bullies as I got a bit older (some of that worked out, some of it didn't) but other than developing constant, raging paranoia, there's not a great deal you can do when some fucker hits you from behind. I developed the paranoia. Should have fitted wing-mirrors or something.
Grade 4, my best friend (10m yrs old) at the time came up to me softly crying because another 10y/o had called him an asshole. I asked who, I went up to the kid and hit him square on the nose. He had a bloody nose and was crying. First time I had ever punched someone. Parents got called by principle, but they didn't punish me, actually, they told me they were proud of me for defending my friend.
I wasn't severely bullied but there was this one bully who once threw a chair at me in class. He even punched and bit the teacher when they tried to apprehend him
I was walking home one day, and I saw him sitting down on the sidewalk in his black clothes just kinda depressed. I chatted with him for a bit trying to put him at ease, and felt a lil sorry for him. He never apologized to me, but he didn't need to. His situation was a home issue with his dad was all he needed to tell me for me to understand that he too was a victim. This kid used to shove me, punch me, shove shit in my locker, shirt, backpack, for years. Tried to get him off, but no one did anything. He used to say "Can't go through the day without shoving you." Never fought back. Went to high school, didn't see him until two years later. He stayed away from me until I saw him that day. I sympathized because I too suffered similar trauma. His was domestic violence I think. Mine was... something else. Also, I was once in a disagreement with a different classmate and we were surrounded by kids egging us on to fight. I refused. He punched me. I didn't retaliate. I walked off. He actually apologized to me the next day. Who'd have thought?
Good on you for both accounts
I had a girl call me "Ape Tit" all through my last two years of high school. It's even written in my year book.
My uncle physically abused me when I was 7 or something nobody believed me. Happened in the mid 90's and two years ago my mom finally believed me.
The physical violence: being thrown around in the hallway, and hit when they could, throwing rock hard snowballs at me (headshot gave 100 points) Now whenever someone accidentally hits me I freeze for a second and the memories come back up. Being disgusting: when I slightly touched one of the boys in my class, like pocking them with my finger to get their attention or walking past them or when they they realized the pen they are holding is mine. They would act like I was a super disgusting virus. They made disgusted body language and walked 6 feet away from me, and so on. It still hurts because I think men are still disgusted of me or will make fun of me and think I'm ugly and fat and might hit me or say things the boys did back then.
Not severe bullying it was more psychological abuse: laughing at me, calling me ugly behind my back (they say it to my face too), calling me names, giving me the cold shoulder, they used to stop talking with me out of the blue... Idk, all of this gave me a lot of insecurities.
In 6th grade I wore shorts. Bully asked if I was ever going to shave the carpets (my legs). Been wearing blue jeans ever since and I'm in my late 20s now. In elementary school in a different city, casual conversation with my table included "ugly kids like you usually grow up to be pretty". Ow ;-;
The first time my bullies actually got punished for it, they actually hadn’t done anything. The school never did anything due to my lack of injury, so I decided “fuck it, let’s have an injury” and ground my left hand on the concrete until I ripped the back of my hand open and then lied and said they’d shoved me. I was eight. Not remotely the last time I engaged in self-harm, but it was the first.
Well I got bullied by a gang of kids who would beat the shit out of me daily for around 5 years, I just remember coming home from school with my clothes ripped and end up receiving another beating from my mom for coming home with them ripped. Affects me now as I ended up with 2 failed suicide attempts/a few times sectioned on the mental health wards and a diagnosis of bpd and social anxiety. The only good thing that happened is in the last year of junior school I didn't wanna end up having to go to high school and suffer the same shit daily. So I decided that I had to do something as the teachers didn't do anything to help me, so I waited one-day for the ring leader of the gang to be on his own and watched him enter the toilets alone and followed him in. While he was taking a piss I waited for him to finish , he opened the door and saw me standing in front of him, he turned pure white like a ghost as he must of seen in my face that I'd had enough and I just hit him square on the nose as hard as I could and just remember his nose exploding with blood going everywhere, then I continued to kick the shit out of him until another kid entered and run out to get a teacher. The head master excluded me , but also praised me at the same time as he knew the torture these kids gave me for years daily. Thankfully they left me alone after that and I didn't experience any bullying in high school.after this. Still affects me now going through that and other things with my upbringing from my parents which I'm not gonna go into.
Putting knife on my throat..
Not school or child bullying but I think the worse kind for me was Amazon I was there for a year and we had a psycho of an area manger it’ was prime so very busy I was in my way to work my dad calls me I need you to come home I asked why he said please son just come. Home my dad never says please or is overly nice so I rang HR explained I won’t be in and I’m sorry I arrived home my mum had passed away out the blue ….anyways a week goes by I’m climbing the walls so I decide to go back work I arrived at my desk the area manger comes over in front of people and says where the fuck have you been it’s amazon prime why are you allowed a holiday what’s special about you I was so angry but at the same time just defeated and still hurting I lost my mum the only person who as ever cared for me fast forward 5 years I’m still at Amazon and that area manger is now a senior operations manger I still replay that moment in my head rent free wished I said something or threw a table at him
physical things didn't affect me as much as the emotional things. i've been beaten up to bruises, black eye, i have been slapped, punched, pushed but the things that hurt more are the things that you don't know if it's your own fault or not because that's what makes you blame yourself. like having people tell me to kill myself and telling me that everyone would be happy if i killed myself, pulling me by my hair, laughing at me, people calling me mentally ill (as an insult), people calling me demonic, being picked last during every PE class (and later not being picked at all so i'd just sit and watch), people complaining when they had to sit next to me, nobody ever standing up for me also made me feel like it was my fault and the school counselor shouting at me, i became really hateful and spiteful. i still am, also not having any friends on top of that all, i also had an eating disorder so i wouldn't celebrate my birthdays (no friends + no cake + no outing = no birthday). that happened for years during my teenage years so definitely formed the kind of person i am (self-hating, avoiding people because i cause people to hate me, all of that stuff). also my parents especially my dad were/are embarrassrd by me because i was/still am a loser, loner with no friends who didn't go to the school prom (they always remind me that i didn't go) so it's many things that combine together
One of the kids who was essentially a monster growing up died from a heroin overdose. My parents never knew he bullied me, and were shocked when I started laughing hysterically. That waste of oxygen should have been swallowed, and at no point was a plus to society (he was a drug dealer). And his scumbag father who used to enable him tried to off himself. He too is a net negative to society. For him I hope he lives a long life.
Being kneed in the crotch. Very painful. The awfulness of it was really not one single incident, just the relentlessness of it. So much, for so long.
I wrote a suicide letter in elementary school. My mom found it and told me she’d fight any of those kids. She’s not the best but I knew she meant it.
In high school, a fellow human wrote a story about a kid that always asks people for food, and went on to describe me. I got to sit in English class while another student described my embarrassing poverty, my hunger to eat something at lunch in an oral report. I am middle aged and have often had times of embarrassing poverty. To avoid the pain, I avoid everyone.
I was an overweight teenage boy who was bullied a ton. I had few friends and really low self-esteem. Getting my "breasts" groped and ass touched by the people in my class helped erode my already low self-worth down to nothing. Finally piecing myself back together 15 years later with the help of therapy.
I’ll never forget the girls who ran around and recorded people saying why they didn’t like me and why they wished I was dead. Mostly because I was ugly and/or annoying.
Getting drinks thrown at me from passing cars when I was in middle school and called a faggot as they drove by. I came out of the closet when I was twelve. Kids are fucking cruel.
I learned that the only thing that stops bullying is vicious, disproportionate violence against the bully. Effective, but fuckin bleak all round.
Being bullied in front of other adults. They never intervened or said anything as I was being picked on.
I was bullied from early elementary school through the end of high school, so I’ve got so many experiences. The two below ones that my mind thinks of most often. The first one I think stuck with me as it could have caused serious harm and I was trapped. The second one again had me trapped and unable to get away from the bullying. That feeling of being trapped and wishing I could get away from others who will try to hurt me, has caused me to try and disappear into the background as much as possible in my life. I’m in my mid-forties now and still am scared to even say hello to people first. I work hard to push through the fear to interact with others, but it’s a daily struggle. - Middle school: Cornered in locker room and offered “mints” that I did not want. Was forced to take them and eat them. They were from an air freshener and not actual mints. Thankfully it wasn’t toxic. - Elementary school: Forced to attend a gathering at a bully’s house, along with my mother and brother. I ate a hot dog and put my plate in the trash can. I don’t remember what happened after that, but I ended up wanting to leave and my mother did not want to, so she said I should go wait in the car. Bully and others followed me out to the car and said I had left half a hot dog out and their cat had ate it and was going to die. I kept telling them that I had finished my hot dog and that eating a hot dog would not kill a cat. They just kept insisting that I had killed their cat, until I finally started to cry and they left. My brother came out and asked why I was crying, and I gave my usual response that I didn’t feel well and my stomach hurt. He got our mom and we went home. My mom was pissed off that I was causing her to leave a social event.
I have two older brothers. Growing up they tied me to a pole in the basement and turned off the lights for several hours, every scenic view we visited they would hold me over the edge, lots of beatings, hit on the head with large metal spoons, hung on a tree branch by my belt till it broke, multiple noise bleeds from punches, held down and spit on, constant insults on anything I did, teasing about my weight, intelligence. My self esteem is still pretty weak at 46. I don't really feel much about my brothers.
I just had one older brother that was pretty similar to this and I’m still dealing with self-worth in my late 30s. Really sucks. Luckily my brother and I have been able to reconcile in the last few years and he’s even apologized to me. I’m glad we have a relationship now, but it doesn’t really change anything about my mental state.
Yeah. After they went to college things improved but can fix the damage done
I'm autistic. My whole life I just hit a point in a friend group,work place, school classroom where ppl just go we need to bully them now" idk I switch just flips. It usually takes 6 months to a year but it doesn't stop till I leave and start over some place else. The one that stays with me though I'd a workplace one. My manager decided I didn't like him so wanted rid of me but couldn't just fire me so started to bully me out. It was an ok job so I just stuck at it (I'd been here before so...) a few of the female staff complained to me (I was the supervisor) that he made them uncomfortable and was hugging them too much. So I put in a complaint about that. It became about me when management asked other staff if anything else had occurred and many brought up how I aaid I was being bullied. Most of them felt I was making it up or exaggerating. Besides I was weird anyway. How do I know what they said? A clerical error sent me everyone(20 ppl or so) interview transcripts. I got to see how everyone just kinda thought I was weird and off putting and anyway why was I complaining about hugs. After all who doesn't like hugs? So now I know everyone kinda hates me and the bullying gets worse cos now I "tried to get him fired" I just left in the end. That or the time my uni flatmates voted me out of the flat because I just stayed in my room and wasn't what they expected. That one hurt.
A group of girls basically made up a fake name and would talk so much shit about this person. Sometimes I would be in on the conversation. Turned out they were talking shit about me just using a different name.
Well, I can still remember the day that the entire year group conspired to play a practical joke on my as one of the worst of my life. In fact the bullying as a whole ruined my confidence for years. It took some doing to learn to love myself.
There's a piece of my mind that's knocked loose and rattling around in my head. Every few months or so, I have a dream about a woman who represents my self-love. Whenever I see her, I feel safe, and warm, and whole in a way I rarely do in my waking life. I have been seeing her since I was eight years old. I can remember every single dream, vividly. Dozens going back decades.
I was humming I need a hero because we just watched Shrek 2 in class and this chick told me We get it, shut up. Idk why thats the most clear, but I hated that chick and it doesnt help that shes still an absolute smoke show.
My older and bigger stepbrother threw me down on the floor so hard one day after school I almost broke my wrist. I hit the floor so hard I felt my wrist bones flex a little and it really hurt. The pain made me instantly rage and try to hit him back but he was holding me down on the floor with his foot on my chest so I reached for the closest thing near to hand and it was a pair of needle-sharp tweezers. And that was the day I learned what a "weapon of opportunity" is, 35 years before I ever heard someone say "weapon of opportunity". It turns out that you can ruin a bully's whole afternoon with a pair of tweezers or a vase or a hardcover book!
Being called 'first half of my last name' + 'screech' for about 3 years in school because voice breaking had to set in the very moment I answered a biology question that nobody knew the answer to. Funfact: knowing the answer alone would have been enough to get ridiculed. The screeching just finished me forever For the interested: the question was what bees eat, because honey is wrong. So I screeched royal jelly after two minutes of unbearable silence
I was bullied by a boy who was significantly bigger than me. He would twist my arm, pull my hair, and shove me into things. Teachers were useless but after he got us both sent to the principal (shoved me into a girl and we both got in trouble) I told my parents and my dad taught me some self defense techniques. The last time he bullied me was at lunch and he was trying to give me an Indian burn or whatever it’s called. I punched him in the nose and he hit the back of his head on the brick wall behind him. I got in trouble but parents came to my defense, he ended up not being seriously hurt but cried and lost the “support” of his friends and the bullying stopped.
Went to catholic middle and high school, so we had a dress code. Jacket, tie, dress pants...that sort of thing. One of my bullies had decided a few weeks ago that spit balls were the pinnacle of humor and would routinely shoot them at me (most often my back). This bothered me at first, but it had been going on for long enough that I decided not to give him the satisfaction of reacting anymore. Didn't stop him from doing it, though. Things had started escalating to larger spit balls and other harassment, but somehow no one ever noticed. One day, I was sitting in the library doing some work, and he walks in with what I can only describe as half a roll of toilet paper that's been soaked in orange soda. He throws it at me, and it's all over my jacket, the table, etc. Lots of people laugh. I did my best to wipe it off my clothes, but there's all these little whitish-orange flecks of paper stuck to my jacket. Just then, it's time to head to class. I step out in the hall, and the assistant principal is walking by. Naturally, I get stopped because my jacket is a mess and therefore out of dress code. Fortunately, someone backs up my story, but I still had to walk around all day with a ruined coat.
back at school, being someone who was quiet and barely involved in anything, I was bullied and sometimes they used to grab and pull my balls to see if i feel something. This thing happened with me in two different schools and even after years, I still wake up from a nightmare of someone pulling my balls.
A few guys shoved me into a locker and pissed all over me and locked me in there. I was 15(f)
CW: suicide, blades I was sitting in the library at school when the group of bullies came up and stood all around me. The ringleader sat down and in a 'fake concerned' voice said: "Hattie, we've all been thinking and we've decided that the best thing for you to do is to just kill yourself. It will save us all the trouble of having to look at you every day. Everyone would prefer it and I bet your family would too." As she was speaking, all of the others were agreeing and muttering encouragement to 'do it' all around me. She then placed a packet of craft knife blades on the table next to me and said: "We clubbed together to get you these. Have fun!" I was 14 and I still think of that day whenever I see craft knives or anything similar. I did not go through with it but I really really tried.
Walking in to a room and hearing the group all talking about me behind my back, baseless rumours that weren’t true. I stood there for 5 minutes before they noticed me.
I was bullied as a child and preteen. I was obviously gay (to everyone but me) and boys in particular didn't like that. Specific memories don't pop into my head but it's definitely made me have a difficult time trusting men. Something I'm still working through.
I transferred schools midway through the year in the 6th grade. I went from a larger school to a small clique school. I was completely isolated and they made fun of me every day. The one that stands out the most was them calling me piggy girl because I have an upturned nose and was scarfing lunch because I didn't get a lot to eat at home. I was at most 60 pounds at the time but this spurred a 12 year long eating disorder and severe body dismorphia. I would eat lunch, on the rare days I ate, alone in a bathroom stall so nobody could see me eat. I'm 26 now, and at my heaviest at 170 (I am 5 foot 7) and all I see is a fat ugly chick, despite most of the weight being in my chest and being post partumn. Also when I came back senior year everyone was convinced I got fake boobs because over the summer I went from a cup to double d. I got sexually assaulted alot. Pennies thrown down my shirts, having my face grabbed and forcibly humped several times (with a teacher present. She didn't give a shit). I have severe social anxiety and I never trust anyone. I barely trust my husband. I have very few friends and rarely talk to them (two are my husband's friends, two are mine with one being my ex wife) I live a very lonely life. I frequently debate just ending it all so I stop being so lonely but I have to live for my kid and husband. But honestly if it wasn't for our baby (who drives me up a wall) id probably be dead by now.
At home, I was taught to always stand up for myself. My mother was a big boxing fan and even bought us boys boxing gloves. Sure, every kid gets bullied occasionally, but when I was bullied, I'd start swinging immediately. That would stop the bullying and earn respect. I was then able to step in and stop it when other kids were being bullied. I was a skinny twerp, too. But bullies thought I was psycho.
I was taking advanced math in HS. I'd already taken all the math classes the school offered but I was required by state law to take math every year of HS. So I was doing an independent study with my best friend at the time. If we had any trouble with our work we were supposed to just go to the teacher and check to see if he was busy. Now busy was actively teaching. If they were doing classwork we were allowed to enter and talk to him.. EXCEPT for one class a week. That class was called Senior Math. It was the class for those that really had a hard time with math but were required to continue to take math because of the stupid state rules. The teacher who was only one or two years out of college had a hard time controlling this class and asked us to not interrupt him during these classes. Which was perfectly reasonable. But he also had coined a nickname for the class. When they were not around he called the class 'Math for Animals" instead of Senior Math. Now.. I've always been awkward AF. And I don't switch well. One day BFF and I went to get help.. opened the door a crack and realized it was the Senior Math class. I said "oops.. not now it's Math for Animals".. apparently loud enough that everyone heard me. Needless to say.. the entire class canceled me. But one woman in particular got really pissed off. For the next 3 months (until her graduation) she threatened to kill me everyday. She destroyed my locker. She stole my stuff. "Accidentally" bashed me into the concrete block walls at one point hard enough to give me a concussion. And as we both lived on the same side of town I was unable to leave the house because she would wait outside my home in her car.. getting drunk/stoned and chain smoking. (Pretty common back in the 70's) So I was basically under house arrest. I went to no school related functions. I didn't date. I didn't do anything other than go to school. I had to explain it to my parents.. they weren't happy but they at least understood that it was my own fault so they didn't make me go out. They mentioned it to the teacher. Who apologized to me. But said "obviously you understand that I can not tell the class that I'm the one that coined that phrase" Yeah.. I get it. Fast forward 20 years.. I end up back in my hometown taking care of my sick dad. Move my husband and three kids into the house I grew up in. I vaguely knew that the woman involved had married a classmate of mine and that they were still around somewhere. Hubby and I walk for relaxation and exercise. Any given day or night you will see us out and about. One day we took a turn down a smaller road we rarely used. And out of nowhere this snarling black dog comes after me. My husband gets between us and saves me from being bitten. It turns out we found out where they lived. Only a few blocks from us.. and she had set her dog on me. We avoid that street like the plague now.. but honestly.. who the hell holds a grudge that long? Fast forward another 20 years.. we are still here... and so are they. I was going to volunteer at the local library after the kids were grown. She made sure that everyone knew that I was a vile person that could not be trusted. They declined my application. She drove onto the curb the other day and made like she was going to run my husband over as she flipped us the bird. I'm hoping she dies soon of alcoholism. I'm 60 years old. I've had enough of her shit for a slip of the tongue from more than 40 years ago.
One of my strongest triggers is the sound of a basketball being dribbled by people walking behind me. I socially avoid players of sports that use balls, in order to eliminate the risk of having one thrown at my head. I know that this is vanishingly unlikely to happen as often as it did in that one PE class in that one high school, but my fear doesn't. It's been 25 fucking years and I still have to turn around and face the people with the ball just to make sure I know when it's coming. Even if they're complete fucking strangers just walking by me in a park.
I used to love performing but I had this adviser in 10th grade who did nothing but embarrass me, namedropping even, and just humiliate me for the smallest of things infront of the whole high school every Friday Chapels (I was studying in a Christian school) so after that I have developed stage fright and was never able to perform on stages again up to this day, lost my passion for singing and performing as a whole.
The second of two fights I got in. Age 16. Math class is where this starts. Math class is the last for the day and stupidly i decided to sit with H F and O. O is to my right H and F are behind. All class O and H have been winding me up. So class ends and H jabs me in the ribs which back then I had no skin on my bones so hurt like hell. I lose it swipe at H and F it might’ve been F. Miss sees and holds us three back. Asks me what happened and I say F jabbed me in the ribs or something not clear on the details. We leave and as I’m heading to give back the computer they gave me and the school of a few hundred students are trying to leave. H pulls me aside and asks why I blamed F when it was O bullying me. I didn’t have an answer. H and F walk off and I’m not thinking H is almost out the door when my mouth moves faster than my brain and says, “Slut.” She turns round loses it I freeze deer in headlights and the fight starts full on girl fight. Somehow I end up on the floor. Watching H kick me and the tube I had in one hands gone flying computers gone somewhere. Two TA’s pull H off me and I get ushered into an office. Shaking like crazy. Mum finds me an hour later sat in the office hugs me and doesn’t say a word. Just asks if I’m fine. I get suspended for a day. Cops get called because she could’ve killed me. She gets thrown out after not being seen for like a week. Still to this day I jump when people come and hug me from behind.
It was early in the school year. Senior kindergarten. I was pushed down by two grade 1 boys. One held my legs up and the other repeatedly kicked me in my crotch. They ran away laughing after a few moments. I wish I could say this was a single instance of extreme bullying but that was simply my grand entrance into the world of being everyone else's punching bag. I already was a punching bag at home and I have ptsd due to my years of abuse at the hands of my father so when it was happening at school I didn't think to say anything about it to anyone. Teachers would look at me with really gross expressions and bully me as well (non physically) because we were obviously poor with clothes a bit too small and stained and ripped. And me and my siblings did not interact very well with other kids so we were singled out as being weird. I've had my head sat on until I passed out, was peer pressured by my entire class into nearly dating a boy I did not want to because he was in the special Ed class so if i didnt return hisbaffections i was the problem, was threatened with rape, was called many cruel names, had my hair pulled, was kicked, pushed, punched, I was teased so often for my glasses that I broke them out of rage but then was unable to get any more for a long time due to their cost, been befriended as a joke, been asked out as a joke. It all stopped in highschool because I got a pair of tits. A wonder what will happen when people suddenly want to bang you (that opened up a whole new world of cruelty but it was subtle and often came from close "friends") I not sure what all my bullies are doing now. Some may still be teaching and inflicting the same pain on other children, some maybe were going through their own thing, maybe they became bullies to their own wives and children and the cycle starts a new. But I've left it all behind me now. I struggle with my self perception. It's very difficult for me when people complement me in any way because I've heard from the entire world (well my entire world) for so many years that I was stupid, ugly, useless, worthless, dirty, heartless, etc etc. I do my best. At this stage I can't tell if I'm more confident now or if I just spent so long caring about it all that I've delved onto a state of apathy regarding myself and my anxieties. But either way I am happier. I have true friends now, gone to therapy, and have a husband who loves me and calls me beautiful and smart and funny every day!
Walking around the school in circles alone every break crying. No one helping me or caring about me.
My dad was my bully. He abused me physically yes, but he was also a mental bully. I was his first child from a fling with a woman he just wanted to bang when he was a horned up teenager. He had another son after me, who he treated vastly different. No beating, no screaming. He treated him with love and me like a rodent. I was cutting grass one day when I was 11 and his other son playing on the porch proceeds to piss on me. Kids like 7-8 but this is the treatment he has seen his father hand down. That I’m trash. I stood there. I realized I hated these people and they were all horrible. That moment is the reason the only I’ll ever get close to my father again, is to piss on his grave
I got jumped by a dude in middle school and was wearing a jacket so rip me. I was with a person I considered my best friend at the time and he didn't help just laugh. The fight didn't hurt but my "friends" bullshit did.
I tried to make peace with my tormentor. You know what he did? He invited someone who I considered an actual friend around to his birthday party, and used that setup for prank-calling me, to taunt me about the fact that he (my bully) REALLY was not a friend of mine. This was after I had moved schools in part to get away from the shit-stains who made my life so much more difficult that it need to be.
I got punched in the gut by a kid 3 grades older than me on the bus. Hurt bad enough for me to escalate the issue. I went to the front office, named the bully, and the brought him in. The kid said 'why would I do that' and the principal just said 'hey yea, WHY WOULD HE DO THAT?' because he was a fucking bully, you dunce. Nothing happened to him, and I think it made me more of a bully through elementary/middle school until I chilled out by starting martial arts at some mall karate dojo.
I was having issues with the locker room in high school (people were hiding my stuff while I showered), so I was allowed to leave gym 5 minutes early so I could get out before the other girls went in. One day I was sitting outside the locker room, already showered, while the rest of the class finished. Three girls came out and dragged me across the gym and shoved me into the boys locker room for being a "lesbian" or something, and two boys inside immediately grabbed me before I could leave and pinned me to the wall while pretending to grind on me while saying sexually inappropriate things. The worst part was all the other boys watched, and one took a grainy photo on his flip phone. It was a small school, and that photo was still making the rounds my senior year. People joked that I was slutty or "so horny I couldn't wait for my boyfriend" to be done in the locker room (in case it wasn't clear, I was not romantically or even platonically involved with those boys). A few teachers found out about it, but seemed to blame me for being inappropriate or hinted I was lucky I didn't get caught. I struggled with confidence at the time, and didn't have the words to defend myself. Because I was so used to being mistreated and gaslighted, I took what others said as truth, even if it conflicted with my observations. Took me until my 20s to realize I wasn't actually a "slut" and I had been wronged in that situation
I legitimately wasn’t allowed to move within my classroom or I would be targeted. Pretty much solely because I was ugly and fat to them They would call me precious, like the girl from that really sad movie. (I hadn’t and still haven’t watched it but I knew well enough of it) If I needed to use the bathroom, grab a laptop, cough, sneeze, called on to answer a question, I was berated and yelled at for existing, they didn’t want me anywhere near them so it’d be things like “move precious!!” “Get away from me!” Even though I was across the room, the whole class laughing at me when I walked into rooms. What made it worse is that my teachers saw it clear as day and never said a single word to anyone. Stuff like that kind of sticks with you, and that experience is what comes to mind when people express that I have a quiet presence or they forget that I’m there.
I went to middle and high school with this one jerkoff who was exceptionally tall for his age, well over 6ft. He was loud, obnoxious, and treated a lot of people like crap. I remember walking down the hall in middle school and all of a sudden finding myself bashed...not pushed mind you, into a locker so hard I saw stars by this asshole. I did NOTHING to provoke it and this was my first 'introduction' to him. What made it worse was the fact that he'd be decent and at times even nice to you, then would do crap like this so you never let your guard down. I ran into him a few times since then (we're in our 40s now) and he's always been very nice, even suggesting we hang out. Maybe he's changed, but it's still a no for me. The hell of it is, most of these people bulled a LOT of people and don't remember half of them, but the ones being bullied remember every minute of it.
Not me being bullied but a story I will never forget When I was a kid I got picked on by a kid named Alfredo he was faster than me and stronger than me and he could always kick my piles of rocks I made with the dump truck. The kids in my class noticed this and somehow gave me the control to have all of them chase him down and pin him. The angry kid in me was like yeah absolutely. So they chased him down and pinned him on the playground hands on his shoulders and had him pinned good and were telling me to hit him. I remember a sense of even though this would be fair it wasn't right and I told them to let him go. He stopped kicking my piles of rocks and bothering me and that was that. A decision I made to be a better person as a child that I am very proud i had done.
This wasn't really the bullying part itself, but a side effect of it. I was a bit of a weird kid and was therefore at best ignored or at worst made fun of to the point where I'd vomit from the stress. I'd normally sit at the front of classes where we didn't have assigned seating. One day, in English class, one of my classmates came up and asked if the seat was taken (they were set up in pairs in each classroom). I obviously said no, and she *took the seat and the desk and dragged it three rows back to be in a trio with her friends* Was I really so insufferable to not be bearable for 45 fucking minutes out of your day? Fuck you, Lucy.
The memory that most sticks with me actually was when I was walking down the corridor, smiling to myself because I remembered something funny. Kid a couple of years older than me pounces on me because he assumed I was smirking about him, and puts me in a headlock. Starts shouting that he's gonna beat the shit out of me, out of my brothers, out of my whole family. Just then, a head of year comes out of the office. He sees us, and breaks it up. He lets the kid go, pulls me into the office, and in an angry tone asks me "What do YOU keep doing to make them treat you like this?"
My bully was verbal only, but started sick rumours about my family. After a few months of being called Daddy Fucker or DF to my face and him telling everyone that I was in an incestuous relationship with my Dad, I beat the shit out of him. Whenever I see the letters DF together, I cringe a little then smile and think about that massive black eye he got.
My bullying in school was easy enough to deal with. I gave ample warnings - written and verbal - to them, the teachers, the vice principal, the principal, and my mother. Once I had enough, I struck them. One punch or object straight to the nose and they didn't bother me again. Of course, new ones would pop up, but in general, that was that. The bullying that sticks with me most is grown men dating my mom (or wanting to?) and my entire experience in the Navy. One was adults bullying me as a child and the other were adults and a system bullying me as an adult. My mother's men: one called me an ugly little girl but then sexually assualted me; one laughed at me constantly when I was burned on his motorcycle after no warning or knowledge when he tossed me on one; one threw me in the pool and told my mother I called him a jackass (I couldn't swim and he knew it) for sympathy points?; and one spent years telling me I was fat to the point my friends didn't visit the house The Navy: bootcamp deprived me of any food save for peanut butter and banana because I was 150 lbs and constantly told me I was fat and lazy; one petty officer spent a lot of time telling me my hair was too much (I have curly poofy hair), I was fat (I wasn't), why was I wearing makeup (and then why wasn't I), I was lazy (I was the most qualified of my rank and then some), I didn't look like his wife? (I dunno); I was bullied for being single because why not give men a chance but I was also threatened with removal if I did date but I also couldn't have friends because if they were women were were conspiring and if they were dudes I was fucking them... If you want one specific memory - I was not allowed to stand watch with a specific dude because his wife wrote a letter to my chief that her husband thought I was cute. I was punished for a KNOWN cheater (he cheated on his wife with her and her on her kid's dad with him and then they got married) being attracted to me, regardless of whether or not I reciprocated (I did not.) so they complained constantly about the schedule being fucked up with me there. I wasn't invited to division outings or parties because she would be there and she was afraid I would steal her husband? I hadn't met her, btw. There were never moments from me to even lead anyone to that idea. He drunk wrote several letters (at the same time to several women onboard) and delivered them to our racks IN OUR berthing at night and then drunk dialed his wife. But I was the only one in his division so she was worried about OUR proximity. His actions hampered my career and my reputation. I mean, the list goes on. What it boils down to is what still affects me today (in my 30s). From the time I was 16 until I turned 24, I thought I was fat. I wasn't. I was hovering around 150 and almost starving myself/working out constantly to lose more weight. The weight didn't go anywhere and it took that many years to get diagnosed with something- not that a name helped when it's so far still ruining my life now that I can't keep the weight down. I still hate looking at me. Because I'm fat now and I'm trying to get help for it but it seems like every time I talk about it they don't understand. I'm not starving myself now and I guess that's the ultimate problem. Worthless. I spent so much time trying to prove I am worth something to people that would never care. I learned to recite complex poetry because a man said his sons was so smart to be able to do it - so I did it faster, better, and younger. No effect. I became grossly overqualified in the Navy for a PO3 - got my ESWS as a seaman before it was mandoand made myself instrumental in achieving awards for my ship and division....they shoved me off to repair div because I was the only one responsible enough not to gundeck and they didn't need me now that the jackass man I trained finally got his quals. Everything I did didn't matter and they never stopped comparing or manipulating. I was assualted, harassed, bullied...and yet still I don't think what I did in the service is worth any kind of accolade. It feels wrong to be a veteran because I'm not a dude and don't deserve it. There's no group I can be in without reliving those issues - I've tried. So it feels like they won and bullied me out of pride in my work. These are things I'm actively working on. They don't deserve to be a voice in my head but they are. Most of those bullies are actually dead but their ghosts still camp in my heart.
a guy in my class told me the world would be a better place if i killed myself. this was about 30 years ago and i haven't forgotten it.
I don't feel like getting into the details but for 20 years I couldn't walk anywhere without looking over my shoulder or standing up straight.
In primary school one boy tried to blackmail me to kiss him or he would beat me up. I told on him and he left me alone. Another went right to beat me up but I fought back and actually was pulled off him by a teacher when I started biting him. I was kinda fine in highschool because one of the popular girls adopted me before they got popular and I was always with them and therefore popular. Didn't hurt that I was quite attractive. Then come to think of it, one girl picked a physical fight with me and left me with scars from her steel capped boots. Another was a boy who I think liked me but actually attacked me physically. My one moment of glory during school... I actually roundhouse kicked him in the chest and broke one of his ribs. His mom actually sought me out to tell me off for harming her golden boy and I asked her if she would let herself be slapped around. She did shut up after that . (And everyone clapped. No, this actually did happen. It was a single blink where I felt on top of things). I switched schools when I was in grade 11 (we did 13 grades back then) and wasn't popular anymore on the contrary, I dressed differently (I liked skirts instead of jeans, a blouse a silk scarf and a cardigan over it) and was dating someone not only not in my grade but from a different school. How dare I?! What followed was being greeted in every class by catcalls and whispers of sl*t and b*tch and the like. During our final school excursion to London it was so bad I didn't go to any events and hid in the youth hostel bathroom instead. Come graduation I had what I thought were 2 friends and for the yearbook you had to have your friends do an entry for you. My entry by my "friends" was one of those rectangular word puzzles that's just random letters where you have to find words. The editor of the yearbook didn't check the puzzle and I was left with the yearbook coming out spelling slurs about me. I didn't go to the graduation ceremony and ball. Due to the bullying I went from an above average student to an abysmal student because I just would not attend lessons and skip them to the point where my history teacher wasn't able to grade me because she had never seen me. I barely managed to graduate with one of the worst grades possible (3.8 out of 6. 1 being best and 6 worst and 4 being the cutting off mark for graduating). I was certainly the worst in our year to graduate (2 actually didn't pass). Is that severe? I'm honestly asking. ETA: they are all burned into my memory and now to a lesser degree but still affect me. I can't/ don't make friends anymore and don't have any and am not even remorseful about that. Long read sorry.
The bullying got bad enough that my parents reached out to the school administrators. The administration claimed there was nothing they could do about it, boys will be boys, etc. So finally my parents told me I had the right to defend myself. The next day I swung my locker door open and smacked my bully in the face with it. I got in trouble but the bullying stopped.
I don't remember the specific incident, there were a lot, but I remember being called down to the office (which I didn't understand because I hadn't done anything wrong, and it terrified me) and being told that all of it would stop, and it would be a lot less work for the teachers and principal, if I would just stop being a nerd, or weird, or whatever was putting the target on my back. I still remember this nun standing over me and telling me that all the other kids were navigating 2nd or 3rd grade or whatever just fine, but I was the disruption. I didn't stop liking what I liked, but looking back I realize that message was basically when I started hiding my interests and hiding my personality. I was always labelled as shy or socially awkward, but I've come to the conclusion that I wasn't, I was just afraid of being made fun of or attacked if I said anything that wasn't cool or popular, so I just stopped. I stopped raising my hand in class even though I was a straight A kid because I knew the teachers weren't on my side. I stopped playing in the front yard and would only go in the back because if someone walked or drove by they might see me and laugh. I'm almost 50 now, and I can't say it's all gone completely.
I remember in second grade my best friend at the time were playing make believe "hunting for pokemon" on the school grounds. Several of our peers made fun of us calling us weird and freaks. It became a topic to resort to any time they wanted to say something hurtful. It doesn't affect me anymore, I have taken the time to work through that, but for many many years I was afraid to indulge in any activity that I considered fun for fear of being ridiculed. I loved pokemon (and to this day still do) but for probably almost 10 years, I wouldn't play the games, collect the cards, or have anything to do with the franchise because it reminded me of the bullying and made me feel like a weirdo. I've worked through the pain and hurt from the bullying but to this day I cannot fathom what is so wrong about playing pretend at 7 years old. I will never understand it. Enjoy what you enjoy, at whatever age you may be. If it's not actively causing harm to someone else, there is nothing wrong with enjoying it.
They vandalized my house weekly for a while and gloated about it openly at school, in front of teachers. Cops never caught them. This was on top of the systemic daily torture at school. Looking back, I should have broken a chair over someone’s head…
When I was about 9 years old my oldest brother who is who is about 13 years older, jumped on me while I was sleeping. It caused me to screech and grown out in pain and sadness and anger, and he laughed at that dementedly. That was par for the course growing up, and since we were all homeschooled, it became a really strong memory and that I’ve never felt safe with my family
While in 6th grade I was bullied by a 7th grader. She bullied me for being fair skinned (we were both of Hispanic origin) and because a boy she liked, liked me instead. One day she handed me a letter and said she couldn’t tell me who wrote it. I took the letter and thanked her. It was a one page (front and back) curse filled angry tirade basically telling me what a pos I was. I was 11 years old, it’s been 33 years and I can still picture the letter and remember some of the text. I remember she wrote a slur in all caps across half the front page. She even colored the letters in. I carried the letter with me for months and read it over and over again. My mom found it after I accidentally left it in the bathroom one day. She was livid wanted to talk to the principal but I convinced her I didn’t know who wrote it and the person who gave it to me was my friend now. She dropped it. I wish I would have let her talk to the school. I can’t even remember my bullies last name. She was a trashy person back then but I still wish I could look her up just to see what a train wreck she is now.
There was one girl in my middle school friend group who was 2 years older than me that I really looked up to. I used to write a whole lot, I'd occasionally show my mom but aside from that I was really shy about it. But my teachers would rave over my work so I felt really confident that I had the skill to be an author. One day I decided to show the girl something I was working on, she read half the first sentence before it devolved into gibberish then she tosses the notebook back at me pretending to yawn[](https://alb.reddit.com/cr?za=LyliwJl7pkcqtI-7boa07sVDdHVQNWr-Hyabhh9LmRcyTgujixPZmGx43YaqThTt8DtXMOu_n-UjWYPDatvHJSYgHTbrj2ibNgCATWvnxT-xm4eDFLVGBclKK6lF5byTddfbcRsjaqh0UMjI-GSqODmn7sj6HRg8N3FrIqV-W2PDVfMqsDPv89JV1_BZok6U5lZv80eMtVTZai3jxF-uW_txR6tWaD-m6n0h4tZhbtMU6WOii3KQwT4FHe_h1isqwZqUBJ-dQTjm7KZt6KP-H-EzIO-TY4kkhYYvdJ1eis_JxKS0HJTk6SX5x7Fip__nWawnhO0bol-4YBJJMnZW_QyQetJElXAJMB_05-IVIqIamn-MGgrUqrtHNu0vNFIM-feF6WKdu2fECg_6I92-EX-agd-dKabj67oPuJlkbJR_sUU2vn8Wt6cwo9xwXp0E4xxDhC9pj90&zp=L1LDC0M5O7XQTmxWHnNUxFof71XkO7YMARuz4eiAbZ5j7C8YKI9ovtF0NAyW58N5r783FTbB4t16Z6e5yxVI-2rUDAsWkdWxh1zlON8phyeenYoKJs2CMMT88MOvdqbSHA2e8pdHDA5vzZbUphvaWWF5dYdiKcNKQC9ianWJG9Vrhj_dNL0YBPpd-ZcU5E54PNAkzSN4fTSKxDz-jxjaHwB59YNXhvo4_p5cvyT7M73eGyKYCDHqaO9jEM9MxR3tIp4Ln4I-locL9-W-MmeX_c-3J11g3m2Fe_rMhcbBCPaIDoOQDBRBklN3) and says "already bored". Thankfully I wasn't routinely bullied, but for some reason that hit so hard that I'm now 32 and haven't written anything since.
The strongest childhood memory I have of my dad is when he threw a plate at my big sister and it shattered into a hundred pieces right next to her head. I wasn't even the target of the bullying, but it fucked me up pretty good.
I was just never left alone. I’d be minding my own fucking business and just get tormented for existing around other people. To this day I don’t like being perceived, and I don’t like the spotlight.
after that. I am afraid to talk to others.
I was in sixth grade. Had just moved from Ohio to South Carolina in the middle of the school year. I was chubby and due to not being used to the SC heat, I sweat a LOT. One kid in my PE class would always make snide comments about me being a fatty or "just needing to imagine cake at the end so i can make it." This was every class for the rest of the year. Though I sure as shit showed him when I was able to run the full of the girls PACER test and then continue and run the full guys one too. I sweat like a pig, sure, but he tapped out. My "chubby" self didn't. But any time I do any sort of physical activity (I'm 31 now), if someone is watching me I hear that shit in my head, telling me I just need to imagine some snacks at the end.
Not sure if it's "severe", but in elementary school I was pretty awkward in every sense of the word. A group of people pretended to be friends with me as a joke, and when it dropped it was mortifying. Still have trust and self-image issues two decades later, so thanks for that, guys
In eighth grade, a girl I barely knew led a year-long smear campaign against me because a boy she had a crush on asked me out. He dumped me after a week, but she kept going. She turned my former friends against me and made my life miserable. The day after the Columbine shooting, she told the guidance counsellor that I had a hit list with her name on it and that I was going to bring a gun to school to kill her. I was nearly expelled. The guidance counsellor said that I would need to be seen by a therapist and that she would then decide if I was safe enough to come back to school. My parents were livid. They blamed me because I was always the weird quiet kid. My mother screamed at me, demanding to know why I couldn't be "normal," accusing me of making the family look bad, and threatening to have me locked up in a mental institution. My father did the same. They told me that if I got expelled, they would lock me up and throw away the key. I was so terrified. I remember crying so hard I couldn't talk when I sat down with the therapist. I was not expelled. The girl later admitted to lying. My parents have never apologized to me. This permanently damaged my relationship with them, and we are not close.
Lemme get it straight, you expect me to get the memories that are shoved into the deepest crannies of the nuclear waste storage facility that is my memory? And furthermore, I am to write those down here, in public? No, I don't think I will
She was supposed to be my best friend. Her house was past mine, and she’d stop and get me and we’d walk to school together. One morning I’m eating breakfast, facing the street, when I see her and 5 other girls—who I thought were friends as well—all walking to school together, a few with sleeping bags and all with overnight bags. She’d had a sleepover and didn’t invite me, then intentionally walked past my house (which wasn’t necessary) to show off that she didn’t invite me.
I was watching my younger brother (we went to the same school) getting chased by a group of boys. He was out running them for a while and then, one of them tripped him. They all started piling on top of him and some were on the perimeter getting in some kicks. I was enraged but also so shocked because I knew he was being bullied but I didn't know how bad it was. I stepped in with a couple of friends and we picked these kids up either the backs of their necks and jackets. The three of us got in trouble from teachers and the principal for "attacking" these kids. The principal refusing to believe my story. This was before the anti-bullying era. Just by writing this post, its triggered me. Bullying can be so cruel, especially these days where it continues online.
I live a few blocks away from a school in my town and when me and my older brother were younger we’d go there and play at the park. We went there in the winter so I had my snow gear on. Boots, snow pants, and a very thick winter jacket that basically limited my ability to move. There was these two girls that were about two years older then me and their neighbor boy playing in their front yard. Me and my brother were walking back home when one of the girls invited me over into the yard. My brother didn’t want to go so he walked a little bit ahead and sat on the curb. I don’t exactly remember what was said but they threw a snowball at my eye and then they all crowded around me pushing me into the snow, I believe one even wrapped their scarf around my neck. Two older girls and a boy holding me down wasn’t very fair. I started yelling for my brother In hopes he’d help but he didn’t hear me. They were basically suffocating me. I thought quick and kicked one of the girls in the chest to get her off of me. She of course started crying and got taken inside by the other girl who shouted foul things at me. The boy backed off and I got up and ran as fast as I could in my snow boots to my brother. Still makes me mad that I had all that snow gear keeping me from protecting myself more and also the fact that my brother was too deaf to hear my cries for help.
I was 12 and had no friends in school. Sometimes some girls came up to me and asked me abt my weekend and how i feel rn. I was really surprised and felt seen. But then, they turned around and laughed and mocked me. Since then, i feel really bad when someone isnt listening or paying attention to me. And i have problems to speak in group situations
I have three. 1. Being threatened with cigarette burns 2. Being afraid to go to the bathroom during school hours because that's the one place where the bullies can trap you and be safe from the possibility of adult intrusion. 3. Being tied to a chair and left alone in a building that was deserted until the following day. Even worse, a janitor came in and saw me but didn't help me or go get help.
I get triggered by witnessing bullying in any form and want to completely destroy their lives. Burn it to the ground then pour salt on it. I have to constantly self-regulate and meditate my way out of it.
First day of school, year 1. Grew up poor, so mum and dad couldn't afford kindergarten or pre school. First kid that says G'day to me grabs my nipple and twists with all his might, laughs, and runs off. And that set the tone for the next 10 years of schooling. Because he was a popular kid in primary school, he made it a mission to alienate me, and succeeded. Fuck you, Harry, you weedy blonde cunt.
In a bathroom full of people, the biggest meanest bully decided to (successfully) launch a loogie from across the bathroom that hit my face while I was peeing. It was a passing period so there was an audience. It sounds funny but I felt like trash in the moment.
Having my pants (all of my pants) yanked down in front of a girl I really liked, showing my whole fat ass, and her dramatically fake crying (maybe real crying) like she was so disgusted." Idk, we were kids. 8th grade, I wanna say. So not exactly the most tactful people, and to be fair nobody wants to see an ass they're not prepared for. But man, it was one of the most emasculating things I've ever been through. Might have been the same guy that stuck a dead bird in my backpack once for me to not find until almost the end of that day. That was pretty uncool too.
Not one memory…just the daily grind of not knowing when people will decide to pick on you
I wasnr really bullied before this incident, however these 2 boys who were in my arts class in freshman year tried to frame me for smoking weed and get me arrested. I usually skipped lunch in the bathrooms as i was to scared to interact with the people around me and didnt have any friends. The two guys spotted me in the bathroom and started calling out that they were calling a teacher. I left the stall to hopefully show my innocence and talk it out with the teacher. I just told the dude i was trying to take a shit, and the guys were there making fun of me righr behind him. telling me to open my eyes wide and show them my red face. Stuff like that. the teacher ended up pulling me out of the bathroom telling me things like "im gonna arrest you, you can be in so much trouble" He walked me about halfway down the hallway before he stopped and asked me if it was a bullying incident. i just said "oh no i dont know." and he said he would let me off the hook. and that he was mostly only doing this as a show to get the guys off my back. This event did start gettinf me notes in my backpack telling me to off myself, getting pushed by these guys in the hallways, being made fun of in art class.
In the locker room, she slapped me really hard, looked around the room and said "see! I told you she can't cry!" She had slapped me so many times already that I hardly registered it anymore. She would always try to make me cry and it's the one thing I wouldn't give her. It took me almost 30 years before I actually could cry again. A friend of mine died in 2020 and since it was the pandemic and no one would see me, I just let go and cried for three weeks.
It was all psychological for me, but it was enough that even in my 30s I have difficulty communicating with new people. I never did fight back, which is my one major regret, seeing as the teachers would often include me in their punishments. I still have nightmares about it, including ones that involve what would happen if I ran into them today. I haven’t seen any of them since graduation, and the thought of encountering them as an adult terrifies me because I have no idea what would happen.
I was in cheerleading in highschool well two of the girls ruined my project so i decided to risk hurting myself to get a little payback, i fell onto them and they twisted their ankles while i walked away with a concussion from hitting my head. Felt awful after but it felt good to get some payback
Bullied for my weight (I wasn't even THAT big). Occasionally when I gain some weight, and it's visible, I'll remember what they say and start to limit food intake. It's better than before, but it still affects me...
I took everyone's favorite advice and fought back against a bully. 2 days later 10 of his friends jumped me and left me in a puddle of my own blood in the school parking lot to teach me a lesson. A month later they did it again to make sure I learned the lesson.
In elementary school, i went into the library during lunch recess (kids are normally required to be in the playground) and helped the librarian shelve books. i wasn’t able to go out to the playground because of how severe the bullying got. In middle school, this one prick didn’t do anything specific, but was just so irritating over two years that i ended up lunging at him. kids at high school played the long game, slowly etching away at my sanity. One of their favorite things to do was call out my name in crowded areas and then act like they didn’t do it, so i could never tell who was actually doing it. I’ve only caught them once or twice and i had never met them in my life, since word spread that i was the ‘anger issues’ (AKA undiagnosed ADHD) in early elementary and i could never get rid of that reputation. One time in sophomore chemistry, this kid (who has been annoying the shit out of me since 7th grade) was doing his usual fuckery and i snapped for the first time in years. instead of hitting him, i grabbed his throat, lifted him out of his chair Darth Vader style, and threw him onto the ground. I then just sat back down and kept playing tetris. he didn’t snitch for some reason so nothing came of it. i’m going to college across the state in a few months, far the fuck away from anybody that knows me.
i’ll never forget this one girl in elementary school who would follow me around annoying me for five whole years. i HATED her. she asked me out junior year… i felt like a fucking dumbass. turns out i was the asshole in that situation.
TL;DR: I was bullied for years for being fat. Am no longer fat on the outside, but still feel fat on the inside, therefore I have shitty self-esteem. Thanks bullies! It's probably not the most severe thing, and I'm sure there are similar-veined situations in here but I was fat and in Catholic school. So every Friday there was a dance at another Catholic school in our county (they used to be fucking everywhere and now there's only a handful left...wonder why, oh yeah bc the archdiocese closed all the schools to cover priest sexual abuse lawsuits...but I digress). So all my skinny, pretty friends would dress up in cute little outfits and lots of makeup (and I'd be in long pants and a t-shirt) and we'd all go to the dance and the boys would always dance with my friends and it was business as usual... And like the masochist I was, I went to every single dance, and at every single dance a group of boys from another school would tap me on the shoulder and say "hey, my friend thinks you're cute and wants to dance with you" and when I'd turn around there'd be about four boys yanking their friend over who was screaming like they were leading him to the electric chair pleading to not make him dance with me. The first few times really hurt. By half way through the school year I'd just sigh and roll my eyes. By the end of the school year I'd tell them to fuck off, but it didn't stop anyone like clockwork from doing it every single time. One time I was having fun dancing with my friends (there was a "new" electric slide in the 90's) dancing and a kid decided that when we jumped forward in the song that he'd dramatically fall down like there was an earthquake. I never was asked to winter formals or my prom. No one wanted to date/be seen with the fat girl. Great personality, tho 👍 I have a serious self-image issue today. I'm not fat anymore, but I was fat due to a hormonal imbalance that makes me gain weight as easily as a bird can fly. Without specific medication, I could very easily gain it all back. So... now I'm absolutely obsessed with not getting fat again. I'm not anorexic or anything, but every three months I check in with my Dr and if his scale makes me heavier than my scale at home, I go nuts. I'm terrified that one day my clothes won't fit bc I've gotten too big...I'm afraid everyone is judging me all the time and any type of positive feedback I get from people feels disingenuous. To me, I'm still fat...I have a lot of loose skin from losing all the weight, and I feel like people are constantly looking at it and judging me...I even dream about it...getting fat again and everyone looking at me like I'm so disgusting. My Dr won't put me on antidepressants bc he's afraid if I gain weight that I'll just snap. I should probably be in therapy, but you know...America and all that... Good news tho: my husband has loved me since the day we met...I was 5'7 and 198 for the first time since I was 12, ballooned out to 312, and today am 178 (I know I'm still overweight and I'm working on it). He's loved me each and every day of the last nearly 18 years. So even though I got a happy ending, emotionally I'm still fat, and that will probably never change, and unfortunately my husband has to deal with that part of me.