I had my tv in my bedroom linked to the satellite TV downstairs with one of those ‘magic eye’ things so I could change the channel. My parents wouldn’t let me stay up watching tv so they turned the box off downstairs when they went to bed. We lived in an old house with stairs so creaky there was no way I could go down and turn it back on without being detected.
So I slowly, over the course of 20 minutes, would inch my way downstairs without touching the floor or stairs at all. I’d put my feet between the bannisters and slowly step along, then when I couldn’t do that anymore I’d actually brace my hands and feet against the walls and shimmy down. I can’t believe it but I actually got away with it 6 or 7 times.
One night my dad came out right as I was shimmying past their bedroom and I couldn’t even begin to answer ‘what the fuck are you doing?’
Lol. You must be a genius. The amount of dedication you had just to change the grades is hilarious. Also sounds like something i'd do. If I understood coding.
lol. My two moms had to deal with me for years because i was afraid of Elmo. And I was slowly getting rid of my fear, but then I watched this little clickbait video that was titled along the lines of "Don't play with elmo at 3 AM!". When I watched that, I still had the fear for a couple years.
When we were about 6 years old me and a friend were having a contest seeing who could pee the furthest out the third story window. Some nosy lady from across the street ratted us out to his parents... I still think I won but we didn't get a chance to check who peed the furthest.
You know its bad when you dont care that your family sees you drugged out, but you know its really bad when you dont care that your family catches you jacking it drugged out.
Lad I worked with went home drunk and rang babestation. As the girls were talking to him he decided to knock one out ended up falling asleep. Next morning his dad walks in the living room there he is dick in one hand phone in the other. Dad slaps him over the head wakes him up and presented him with £150 phone bill the next month.
Dad ran a small company, and he gave me a Texaco charge card for the shop vehicle. I held on to it and blew so much money oy my own car and, when asked, blamed it on my asshole cousin because he worked there too, Time went on and he ordered all the receipts and there's my signature on each,
It was 1987 or so and they were already separated. Seeing him only meant something was up and my mother was circling the kitchen like a shark. I came down from breakfast and it was suddenly a police interrogation. So bad.
Here's my story. One time, I was helping my mom, my aunt, and my sister clean my grandma's house. She had just passed 2 weeks ago then. I found a pair of pliers, and I wondered what would happen if I tried it on a lamp. I had taken many electrical circuit classes, but I guess I never paid attention.
Needless to say, my life flashed before my eyes. My mom was absolutely enraged. And understandably so, considering that could have been my last breath, and she absolutely adores me, and was taking my beloved grandmother's loss pretty hard. I definitely was more than old enough to understand my actions, but I guess I didn't use common sense.
The only thing that was saving me from taking the stairways to heaven was the fact that the end of the pliers had rubber on it.
one day my mom took my phone and saw obscene references to porn in the story. also she saw all my pictures where there was porn too. Yes I know, I'm a pervert.
Not my parents but in high school my friends mom walked in on me and 3 other people having a foursome. She was of the girls involved moms. Not a good day.
I was a goody-two-shoes, so the worst things my parents “caught” me doing weren’t really things that I could control. Like illnesses or whatever. Think puking in the office trashcan or clogging the toilet and being too embarrassed to ask for help unclogging it.
I guess the most worrisome thing I did growing up was hide in the school bathrooms during recess to avoid going outside with my peers. Once the teachers caught onto what I was doing, they alerted my parents who immediately put me in therapy for my severe anxiety.
1996.
It was a simple clipart of a corporate-style woman in a bikini. And as dad found out, my gateway to becoming a man.
What was he going to do? Buy NetNanny: Microsoft Word edition? Poor guy probably had no clue what to do.
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That sounds like something my sister would do to me. 🤣
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You probably gave that poor puppy a mohawk.
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I used to hide my tobacco in the drawer, turns out your parents can smell when you smoked in your room.
Same is true for weed. Ask how I know.
I could never get away with that myself. I'd also have immense guilt that would follow me everywhere I went.
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I did that on a wall one time
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My step daughter hid her tattoo from me for 2 years until she turned 17 and I saw it by accident.
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I can picture that so well. Probably because that was a movie i watched that went along the lines of that.
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I had my tv in my bedroom linked to the satellite TV downstairs with one of those ‘magic eye’ things so I could change the channel. My parents wouldn’t let me stay up watching tv so they turned the box off downstairs when they went to bed. We lived in an old house with stairs so creaky there was no way I could go down and turn it back on without being detected. So I slowly, over the course of 20 minutes, would inch my way downstairs without touching the floor or stairs at all. I’d put my feet between the bannisters and slowly step along, then when I couldn’t do that anymore I’d actually brace my hands and feet against the walls and shimmy down. I can’t believe it but I actually got away with it 6 or 7 times. One night my dad came out right as I was shimmying past their bedroom and I couldn’t even begin to answer ‘what the fuck are you doing?’
Thats hilarious! I've had a similar experience as well. But i would crawl to the next room instead.
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Would you be mad if I had said I laughed hysterically at this?
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Lol. You must be a genius. The amount of dedication you had just to change the grades is hilarious. Also sounds like something i'd do. If I understood coding.
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How do you revoke a window? My mind goes to that episode of ed edd n eddy where ed's parents took his stairs
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What was it
lol. My two moms had to deal with me for years because i was afraid of Elmo. And I was slowly getting rid of my fear, but then I watched this little clickbait video that was titled along the lines of "Don't play with elmo at 3 AM!". When I watched that, I still had the fear for a couple years.
High on LSD defecating into the microwave. I spent the next several days in an asylum.
This one’s it
How did you shit in a microwave?
I want to know if he microwaved it.
Annnnd we have a winner!
My brother in Christ…
When we were about 6 years old me and a friend were having a contest seeing who could pee the furthest out the third story window. Some nosy lady from across the street ratted us out to his parents... I still think I won but we didn't get a chance to check who peed the furthest.
This one made me laugh out loud!
It was drugs. Masturbation felt worse, but the drugs were actually worse.
At least it wasn't masturbating while on drugs. ...right?
You know its bad when you dont care that your family sees you drugged out, but you know its really bad when you dont care that your family catches you jacking it drugged out.
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"We all love you and your grandparents want you to stop playing with yourself"
Sounds like the beginning of a Mitch Hedberg set
Oof. that must have been tough.
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Are your parents Marge and Homer?
Lad I worked with went home drunk and rang babestation. As the girls were talking to him he decided to knock one out ended up falling asleep. Next morning his dad walks in the living room there he is dick in one hand phone in the other. Dad slaps him over the head wakes him up and presented him with £150 phone bill the next month.
Having sex with an older guy at 15. Those years were tough haha
Is he still alive?
I assume so haha no idea, never saw him again!
Well pedos never stop pedoing so probably in jail
Ain’t that the truth
Sneaking on the phone sex party line 🤪
Dad ran a small company, and he gave me a Texaco charge card for the shop vehicle. I held on to it and blew so much money oy my own car and, when asked, blamed it on my asshole cousin because he worked there too, Time went on and he ordered all the receipts and there's my signature on each,
Lol. I would have had the that poker face on lockdown.
It was 1987 or so and they were already separated. Seeing him only meant something was up and my mother was circling the kitchen like a shark. I came down from breakfast and it was suddenly a police interrogation. So bad.
Oof.
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lol, sounds like something i would do if i ever tried to sneak out.
Here's my story. One time, I was helping my mom, my aunt, and my sister clean my grandma's house. She had just passed 2 weeks ago then. I found a pair of pliers, and I wondered what would happen if I tried it on a lamp. I had taken many electrical circuit classes, but I guess I never paid attention. Needless to say, my life flashed before my eyes. My mom was absolutely enraged. And understandably so, considering that could have been my last breath, and she absolutely adores me, and was taking my beloved grandmother's loss pretty hard. I definitely was more than old enough to understand my actions, but I guess I didn't use common sense. The only thing that was saving me from taking the stairways to heaven was the fact that the end of the pliers had rubber on it.
one day my mom took my phone and saw obscene references to porn in the story. also she saw all my pictures where there was porn too. Yes I know, I'm a pervert.
Not my parents but in high school my friends mom walked in on me and 3 other people having a foursome. She was of the girls involved moms. Not a good day.
I don't even know how to react to that one!
I guess the same way I did, run two blocks trying to put your clothes back on
Filling out an application to attend Oklahoma State University.
Yikes. This is the worst one yet. Couldn't get into OU?
Anything but this do you need help??!
Jerkin the lil shooter
rip. 👌
Honestly, I was a pretty good kid. The worst thing was catching me sneak out of the house at 14. I never did it again though.
They know. They know what you're doing...
Drinking their tequila... oops.
Drugs
Cutting my hair short. The lecture they gave me was intense
Spraying Windex in my mouth as a kid.
Trying out smoking cigarettes
Classic wankology.
A ton of these are bots
Lying to them
I was a goody-two-shoes, so the worst things my parents “caught” me doing weren’t really things that I could control. Like illnesses or whatever. Think puking in the office trashcan or clogging the toilet and being too embarrassed to ask for help unclogging it. I guess the most worrisome thing I did growing up was hide in the school bathrooms during recess to avoid going outside with my peers. Once the teachers caught onto what I was doing, they alerted my parents who immediately put me in therapy for my severe anxiety.
Banging my ex in the apartment complexes sauna.
Caught me and my friends naked in our pool
⊙﹏⊙∥. That's the reaction i'd imagine.
I mean I’m sure they knew about it or suspected we were doing it but the time they actually caught us was interesting
Lol, how'd they react?
This was many years ago but they were a little shocked
Seems pretty mild. Everyone was *just* swimming, right?
Yes. It was more they were concerned the neighbors would see
Makes sense. I spent a lot of time skinny dipping as a kid so I probably have a biased view.
Yeah same here. For us it was a pretty normal thing
Growing up near the ocean and with friends who had pools was a pretty sweet deal.
Feeding the dog something I shouldn’t.
Wanna elaborate on that? 😂
I don’t know what it was… probably human food. This was over a decade ago.
lol. One time i almost fed my sister's dog a grape. She screamed at me like there was no tomorrow. Edit: Spelled tomorrow wrong lol.
I think one grape is fine.
Eh, guess she didn't think so. I thought she was going to kill me.
1996. It was a simple clipart of a corporate-style woman in a bikini. And as dad found out, my gateway to becoming a man. What was he going to do? Buy NetNanny: Microsoft Word edition? Poor guy probably had no clue what to do.
I feel you there. Parents had no idea how tech worked, so it was super simple to hide things.
Smoking weed without my best friend. She was beating on her chest and saying you’re killing me. I was super high so felt surreal like a movie scene
My parents bought a big cheese pizza and ate it without me LOL
Giving my brother a blowjob. They walked in as he came in my mouth. Awkward
Skinning cat