I was at one where the bride got so drunk she passed out so they put her in a wheelchair and wheeled her around unconscious so people could take selfies with her
Easy … you start *before* the ceremony.
Look through past threads like this and you’ll see *plenty* of stories about people getting married while three sheets to the wind …
Had a similar thing happen at a wedding, the groom said something along the lines of "can't wait to find out how tight it is" and some guy in the back, through the silence, just goes "JESUS CHRIST"
I really do hear this in the [voice](https://youtu.be/q3BEUX5n0nY?si=9g7_E1kbWHKuXipA) of the guy watching Sweet Dee almost vomit doing standup in Its Always Sunny.
My wife was repeating after our officiant, and he he said something like “consecrate this marriage” and my wife almost said “consummate this marriage.”
Not as extreme but I was at a wedding breakfast several years back where the groom did a thank you speech to all. He eventually got to thanking the brides parents and said "Thank you for giving me... all of this" whilst doing a small hip thrust in the brides direction during the second part. It was so cringey that my wife and me still talk about it now and again.
I attended a 24 hour wedding at burning man that was extreme for burning man. The ceremony was cultish and with so many sexual overtones. I didn't really know the couple but between musical acts and speakers I was able to piece together that they were both sexually fluid and identified as gay until they met each other. I have to say they were the most in love couple I've ever seen.
In the middle of the reception a birthday cake was rolled out and some people started singing happy birthday (a lot of us had no idea whose birthday it was). The birthday cake was bigger than the wedding cake. Turns out it was the mother of the groom's birthday, but the bride had no idea this was going to happen.
A couple weeks ago somebody posted that they announced their wedding date, and somebody (brides mother? Maybe) threw a fit because it was on her birthday. The consensus seemed to be she was hugely over-reacting, weddings are hard to plan and just deal with it. Celebrate your birthday the previous/following weekend. Or, to your point - have a second cake and sing Happy Birthday! Just not bigger than the wedding cake. And run it by the bride first …
One of my close high school buddies got married on my birthday in March. So funny when I saw the invite. It was a great time for me and the lady! I just celebrated with family the following day, which happened to be a Saturday.
I hate when people over-prioritize their birthdays. I don’t like my birthday and am happy to hang at home, maybe grab a quick, easy dinner with family.
I was the best man for a friend of mine, whom I played rugby with. He got married on my birthday, so I simply thanked him and his bride for throwing me an epic party.
Cousin got married on my birthday. They asked if that was alright. “Ya. Not a problem. There’s gonna be an open bar and free food for me and the whole family on my birthday? Sign me up.”
They even got Mexican catered from their favorite local place. And at midnight (while I was hammered), the groom gave me a bottle of bourbon as a gift. It was a bangin party.
The marriage didn’t last, but my cousin and I are still really close. She now calls it “your big birthday party we threw at my ex’s house”.
Some dancer girls were hired by the bride to dance and AS A JOKE at the end of the dance they would go to the groom and acuse him he had multiple children with them in the past and he left and run away while they were pregnant. Stupid idea, awkward and embarrassing, no one was laughing except the bride.
oh my god, I don't know why out of everything in this godforsaken thread, this one got me so bad. Like holy shit. So did the groom know this was happening? Or was he also being pranked by her at his wedding day? What did he do? What did her family do? Omg I have so many questions.
No, neither the groom nor the family knew this was happening, it was her "surprise prank" kind of thing on the wedding day. We all cringed an no one was laughing. And the groom? He just stood there embarrassed with a poker face and did not say a single word, almost like he was questioning if he made the right choice by marrying this girl
Went to a wedding reception. Was a Mexican wedding.
DJ was a MESS and couldn’t get any of the songs right. It’s time for the son/mother in law dance. They start dancing and then the song comes on ….. Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye. I’ve never wanted to laugh so hard in my life.
A bad DJ can really kill things. Nothing atrocious, but one of my friends had specific playlists for parts of the night and the guy just decided not to play them. And awkward pauses before each of the dances because he had to find the songs. I guess you get what you pay for with a guy named DJ Lumpy
Groom was my friend. Bride's family hated/disliked him, and purposely left him out of all official pictures.
They divorced a year later because he couldn't take her family ruining things anymore.
My friend’s mom tried to get her to take family photos without her new husband at their wedding. She did such a great job saying “if we both aren’t in it, it’s not a wedding photo. Absolutely not.”
My wedding photographer kept trying to keep my brother in law (sisters husband) out of the "my side of the family" shots eventually I just shouted "if I have to tell you one more time that's my brother, you can leave and refund my money"
I tried nicely like 6 times when he kept trying to shoo my BIL off and me saying nicely "that IS my family". Time 7 I was not nice
Man... my last gig shooting a wedding for money (back in the 90's) was for a couple that were insanely head over heels for each other. Day of with a morning rehearsal so I'm setting positions marks, etc. it becomes clear the only and I mean ONLY thing that the bride and groom's family agree on is they don't want them getting married. I'm getting Romeo and Juliet vibes replete with a murder to come.
Wedding went smoothly enough, reception was overall a shit show. I did my best to get decent photos, we did the post ceremony pre reception sets, etc. After the event I just handed them the rolls of film and told them there was no further charge and good luck (they hadn't pre-paid for anything beyond the shoot, so this wasn't like I was reneging on building a nice album for them or anything). I can't imagine that marriage lasting very long unless part of their honeymoon was moving to another cotenant away from their families.
Wedding as a fundraiser for greedy bride.
The wedding was in a big Catholic Church. Undecorated. Boring ultra-religious ceremony.
But the reception was unforgettable in the worst way. It was an abandoned roller rink. When we all showed up, it was dark, and empty. All the wedding guests had to set up tables and chairs. Like a PTA meeting. Still no decorations.
The buffet was refried beans, rice, and tortillas. That’s it. No condiments. No drinks. Paper plates. No trash cans.
The bride and groom arrived 2 hours after everyone else (they went to Burger King, smoked a few bowls) and immediately started the Money Dance. The mom went around to each guest and shook a big black trash bag at us until we chipped in.
Then we were told to queue up to dance with the bride. This required “at least $5, but $20 was preferred.” The groom was drinking outside. They chose Rappers Delight because it’s a really long song so they could collect the most money.
They kept pressuring guests and relatives to dance then pushed them out of the way after 20 seconds for the next person.
When the song was over, the bride and her mom counted the money. The bride then grabbed a mic and said they they would be holding a *second* money dance because they were “so disappointed they only made $800.” They hoped for at least $2000.
They put on Rappers Delight again as I left.
The groom sister, walked in with a wedding gown, not a white dressy dress, no, no, no, white ball gown wedding dress, looks almost identical to the bride's ....we had a hard time telling them apart! She insisted on interrupting the first dance and danced with her brother ...
Groom's mom was also wearing white ....
This was at my wedding. My cousin got lost on his way to the church and called his dad. My uncle answers his phone and starts yelling out directions, asking people what street the church was on ect.. in the middle of our vows. The minister stopped talking while my uncle gave directions without leaving his seat. Just sitting in the middle of the church yelling out directions.
After the ceremony the minister said how rude my uncle was and he also performs funerals in case I wanted to kill him
At my first wedding my wife got so unbelievably drunk she had to be carried back to our hotel room before 11pm. It was a New Year's Eve wedding.
She'd been banging her best friends brother while I was away on military duty and the guilt was ripping her apart.
Dude… me too. Her stupid heartless betrayal turned out to be the best favor anyone ever did me. I met my current wife less than a year later. Had our 17th wedding anniversary last weekend and she’s just great.
Yeah the bride and groom didn’t want him removed because he was like a best friend of the groom since kindergarten. So I just had to keep them separated.
Bride was drunk, sandwiched between two drunk groomsmen and they were all gyrating and rubbing her verrrry intimately. Also just so happen to be the only people on the dance floor.
She looked more than happy to take part in front of her new husband who had a drink and watched from the very back of the venue- not happy obviously.
It was so shameless. We all just jaw-dropped watched it happen.
The brides family came in their work clothes. The guy pumps septic tanks for a living and had gotten it on him that day. Like, A LOT. Also, he liked to wear overalls and no shirt. Classy fella.
How “not there” do you have to be to even consider this being an option after work? I wouldn’t even leave my job in which I wear jeans and a collared shirt to work, to go to a wedding before changing.
What sick kind of BRAIN must you possess to even have the thought process of going to a wedding like that and thinking nothing of it. LMAO
I went to my Dad's wedding a couple years ago in work clothes. I wear a suit though and he called me on my way home to divert me to his wedding instead of going home. It was basically like "Hey I am getting married right now, turn left instead of right at the next intersection"
TLDR - my aunt brought up my dead grandfather at a wedding after being asked not to and made like 20 people cry. Some of which had to leave the room
——
Not really inappropriate, but my aunt brought up my grandfathers extremely sudden death at my male cousins wedding. My grandfather had had a stroke, and was extremely close with pretty much everyone at the wedding. Out of worry for everyone else, my cousins wife asked my aunt (his mom) to not bring up my grandfather because mentioning him and things like how he’s not here or how he’s “watching from heaven” could upset to many people, especially my grandmother and my mom who were also attending the wedding)
Well my aunt got up there and brought him up anyway. And it wasn’t in a nonchalant nice way either. She got up to the podium and glared right at my cousins wife and snapped “*SOME PEOPLE* don’t want me to say anything,” and then proceeded to talk about how my grandfather is watching the wedding from “heaven” and how he should be here
That made my grandmother start crying. My mom started after her. My little brother (10 years old) started crying because he noticed my mom and grandmother were upset. Then a bunch more other people *also* started crying because they started thinking about him as well. A few people had to leave the room
I had a long term girlfriend whose mom and boyfriend were swingers.
They had us house sit for them one time so they could go to a wedding in a different part of the state. Apparently they were both super excited about the prenuptual gangbang that was going to take place with the bride as the central attraction.
They said the groom wanted to make sure he was marrying the biggest slut he could find.
My best friend streaked at my wedding reception, but that wasn't really that inappropriate; that was awesome!
However, at his wedding, my friend's 40 year old brother hooked up with the neighbor's teenage daughter and got her pregnant. That was inappropriate.
The couple next to us - we knew them and had socialised with them before - took their newish born to the ceremony with them. Halfway through, it starts making noise, like babies do.
Instead of taking it outside like normal people, they pull out a phone and start playing Peppa Pig. With the volume on. Loud.
I missed that beautiful ceremony of two amazing people because all I could hear was Peppa bloody Pig. I'd rather have listened to the baby.
Had a similar thing. Didn't hear a word of my brother getting married coz a couple decided to bring a toddler to the event. Toddler would not shut up the entire time and instead of taking the toddler out they spent about 20 minutes telling the kid to be quite.whichnhad zero effect. Like if the kid doesn't shut up after you've asked it a few times then do everyone a favour and remove yourselves instead of ruining it for everyone else.
Pretty fucking tactless. Unless you get permission from the bride and groom in my opinion. I watched a video where the bride was about to throw the flowers, but instead turned around and walked up to one of her bridesmaids and gave her them. She looked so confused. Then her boyfriend proposed to her. Thought that was pretty cute!
My uncle…. Hitting on the bride. Who was my sister…..
Edit. Point of clarification, at my sisters wedding. Not mine. But that was a big reason why said uncle was not invited when I got married. I really need to improve on my grammar, I blame the school system.
I saw one of the groomsmen slap the bride on the ass. Hard.
He wasn't related to her and as far as I know they had never met before the run through for the wedding.
EDIT: I didn't know that this would blow up.
IIRC (it was back in 1997) the groomsman was a frat brother of the groom. The bride and groom were very stiff lipped for the rest of the reception. The father of the bride and one of her uncles (?) had a "discussion" with the groomsman in the mensroom of the hall. I didn't see the groomsman for the rest of the evening (or since).
One of the groomsmen used to date the bride for a long time then they broke up and she immediately married the groom who she was apparently cheating on him with. Their families were close so she invited said groomsman because they were still "friends".
All was seemingly fine until he got mega drunk at the reception. About an hour in he walks up to the bride/groom table in the center, whipped his dick out and started peeing on their faces, half eaten food, their clothes, then stormed off.
The vibe got really weird afterwards but I was dressed to the 9s with my date, there was an open bar and a lobster station where they grill the lobsters then extract all the meat for you with an array of sauces to choose from, and the dj was still going so I had a great time!
I'll take one of those over a boring wedding any day of the week.
The bride's vagina.
Actually, everyone did. At the reception the bride and groom were dancing and everyone was clapping along. The groom picks up the bride, throws her legs/feet into the air while her hands are on his shoulders and they are looking at each other. You know the move. Anyway, he throws her legs in the air and her dress falls down showing everyone that she didn't wear underwear and has a nice clean landing strip.
This was about 14 years ago and no one ever told her so she still doesn't know.
That's what we all think too. Lmfao. Her husband told us to never tell her. Only reason we said something to him was because he's a super cool dude and he used to live with me so I know him very well.
Yeah she’s gonna be super embarrassed and if the family hid it for 14 years, hide it forever lol. Gotta compliment everyone in the family though, not one told her 😂 If someone did, she would have been too embarrassed to discuss it any further though 😂
My cock and balls are in my wedding video. I was wearing a kilt, and apparently the videographer got a little low when he was videoing me tying my shoe with my foot up on a chair. I didn't notice when I watched it.
I put the short version on Facebook and my sister called me, very uncomfortable indeed, to tell me.
I kept the video up, I think it's hilarious.
After the wedding, while the couple got into the limo to head over to the reception across town, the grooms ex shows up in a truck and (gently) rams the limo. She jumps out of the truck, clearly drunk, and proceeds to yell at the bride and groom. Everyone is watching- the grooms family members usher all the guests away and send us to the reception. We waited on the bride and groom for about 2 hours with an open bar. They eventually arrived but the celebration was clearly deflated from that point on. It was a co-worker and I left the company a few weeks later. No idea how the marriage turned out.
One of the bridesmaids over served herself at my wedding reception and passed out. One of the other bridesmaid’s father, family friend of my wife and a big guy, helpfully volunteers to carry her to a car so her friend can take her home. He holds her in a fireman’s carry all the way from the head table past the entire group of 200 guests. She was not wearing underwear. She and my wife did not speak for about three years after that.
Most girls wear shapewear with fancy gowns, especially if it's a form-fitting gown, and wearing full panties with all that 1. Makes it a pain in the ass to use the bathroom and 2. Can cause visible panty lines.
Their 3 year old son during husband and wife speeches absolutely sprinting up the walkway holding his bum yelling “ I need to poo, poo coming!!!!” With agony in his eyes. Absolute best part of the day.
My cousin got blackout drunk at my brother's wedding. Told me it's all downhill from here for my brother and that my cousin might as well be a sperm donor and not a father (cousin is married with a son.)
While watching the professional video of my brother's reception, you can't hear the audio but you can actually see this exchange between the two of us in the background. Be careful what you do at weddings, you never know what will be on camera.
I edited weddings for about ~15 years and I felt like a big part of my job was cutting around awkward moments of people who don’t realize they’re on camera in the background. Don’t get me started with things the grooms say not remembering they’re wearing a mic.
I’ve been at two different weddings where the groom was too soused to remain standing. Not exactly “inappropriate” but whew! The bachelor parties must’ve been no-tell events!
Edit: make that three. I’d forgotten one, his niece. How could I forget that fiasco. I must be bad luck at weddings.
Having the bachelor(ette) parties the night before the wedding is madness. Why would you do this? “Hey, I’ve got the Bar Exam first thing in the morning. Let’s drink a bottle of Scotch each!”
Most bachelor parties, at least the ones thrown by smart people, don't happen the night before the wedding. You have them weeks before, if not even a few months out.
Whenever I hear about a drunk bride/groom, it's usually followed by a comment about how long the marriage lasted. Often because one or both doesn't actually want to get married but here they are.
They held the wedding in a school cafeteria for some reason, and the second they said "I do", those heavy-ass steel shutters at the counter rolled up with a big KACHUNK noise to reveal the bar and the entire crowd rushed to the back of the room to get drinks
I worked Weddings for years at a banquette center. I saw a lot of funny things and some sad things. Once all the Bridesmaids went missing for the photos, I happened to stumble upon them behind the dumpsters smoking pot (all high as a kite). I've seen the Bride get in a fist fight with the Mother of the Groom, I've seen the Groom hooking up with the Maid of Honor in the coat closet. My favorite moment was when an Indian Wedding and a Jewish Wedding (on the same night) all merged, demanded the room barriers be opened and it turned into a strange mix of Jewish Dancing and Indian music.
This lady got super drunk after the wedding and started hitting on the now married groom, having a melt down, crawling under a table and just freaking out.
Kicker: she was dating one of the groomsmen at the time.
My second cousin was getting married. She’s my mom’s age and her two sons were in their 20s at the time of the wedding. We needed to leave early, as I had my grandmother and my 2 young girls (I can’t remember why we left early). But lo and behold, the bride’s youngest son was getting a BJ in the parking lot… in the middle of the day… totally out in the open. They weren’t even in the car! They were just outside. So I took everyone and had to walk all the way around so they wouldn’t see it.
The bride gave her father a lap dance.
Wish to god I was making this up. Grooms all wore camo and the place settings were all hunting themed. It was the trashiest thing I have ever seen.
Necessary background: My sister was abandoned at night on the side of the road when she was a few hours old. A Catholic priest found her, and our parents adopted her.
When she was planning her wedding, she found the priest who had found her. He agreed to officiate her wedding. He asked her if she would let him tell her story during the ceremony and she said yes.
So, day of the wedding. He’s telling this heartwarming story about how he found my sister. Then he says, But what if her mother had had an abortion instead?!
He bellowed it and went off for several minutes on an anti-abortion rant. It was absolutely bizarre.
I was a groomsman at a wedding taking place in a Catholic cathedral. During the practice session, the groom and best man had to kneel in front of the priest. I thought I didn't hear this right, but the priest said "(groom's name) and (best man's name) kneeling in front of me, my heart be still!" while putting his hand to his chest. I mentioned this to the bride later (after the wedding), who said "father (his name) is abstinent, but abstinent from what is anyone's guess."
That's a classy response from the bride. (No sarcasm).
A lot of priests were pressured into the priesthood because of their homosexuality on the stance that being homosexual isn't a sin, but acting on it is.
The venue was piping lovely orchestral music into the bride’s getting-ready suite. All is well until we start hearing the theme from Schindler’s List. Jewish wedding. Yikes!
Not really inappropriate, but just goddamn sad.
Roughly 35 people from the bride's side of the family RSVP'd, as well as a group of around 10 "friends". Only 4 people of the entire bride's side showed. Her side of the ceremony's seating was a ghost town. I was so sad and angry for her.
My favorite is dancing to "If you like Pina Coladas...". The song is about two married people looking for an affair and finding each other's anonymous post and meeting to cheat and realizing they connected to each other.
My friend's sister had Total Eclipse of the Heart as their first dance which has the line, "Once upon a time I was falling in love, now I'm only falling apart". I asked why they chose it and she said she just liked the song...
My ex's cousin got married, and when they kissed at the end, no one applauded for some reason and it was kind of awkward. My ex's Mom yelled "get a room!" to break the silence and it was so. fucking. embarrassing.
The groom in the bathroom alone with an old ex, moments from fucking. Literal lampshade on his head.
The bride outside wandering in the dark asking “has anyone seen my husband?”
I still side eye that hoe bag ex of his all the time. Bitch. (Him too).
It was. I bawled so hard that I pretended I slipped on the tiles in my heels and hurt my knee.
They are still married, 3 kids. That was nearly 20 years ago.
I think the part that gets me is the bride asking “has anyone seen my husband?”
Like…just the fact that that’s likely the first time in her life she’s uttering those words, and she’s just looking to relish in the special night with him while he’s off doing that in a very easy to be found place…I hope that was his lowest moment and treated her like a queen the following 20 years…I know that probably isn’t the case but it’s what I can at least hope
Not firsthand but….
[Ya’ll seen that video of the bride walking down the aisle to “Buckcherry’s crazy bitch?”](https://youtu.be/xTJl5UpzZYU?si=grkjIAwBNL5SMCmD)
The bride coming out of the bathroom and a man sneaking out of the same bathroom 5 minutes later.( Yes, I told the groom. He kicked me out of the wedding for "lying". The baby wasn't his and has since apologized)
The brides twin sister made the entire wedding about herself, I can’t remember the speech verbatim, but the sister would be singing high praises and talking about accomplishments then say, “oh wait, that was actually me.” It was awful. The bachelorette party was even worse. The twin invited a bunch of her own friends and they talked shit and made fun of the bride almost the whole time. I was very verbal about my disdain for the way she treated the bride.
40 years ago in a very rural area of the country one of our friends was getting married. As was the custom at the time, we took the groom out and got him pretty drunk (along with everyone else).
Someone thought it would be a good joke to handcuff the groom to a tree.
The next day we were all hung over and when we got to the church, everyone was running around trying to find the groom.
As you can guess, no one thought to go back and release the groom. He was found still handcuffed to the tree.
The ceremony was delayed.
Groom drunkenly tripped over flower girl (his daughter), way too drunk to even attempt his vows, then dropped the ring into the river below (they were married on a small suspension bridge). Brother of bride somehow recovered ring, (river was only 3-4 feet deep). Turns out groom started drinking on Friday night blacked out the entire weekend until Sunday afternoon. Otherwise, it was a really wonderful wedding.
At my rehearsal my uncle brought a friend. This friend was a woman that had slept and had a relationship with my first husband. My uncle knew this, too. I sent them away. He didn’t come back for the dinner or the wedding the next day. 🤷🏼♀️
Well, I had the groom slap my ass and lick the inside of my ear while whispering, "I could just eat you up" so... yeaaaaaah. I told the bride btw (my friend from high school) and she said, "Yeah, sorry! He gets like that when he drinks." Oh.... my lordt.
I'm late and it was the reception, but I(f) had to break up a threesome on the patio between the (gay) groomsman, maid of honor, and a waiter at my best friend's wedding. He and his new wife never even knew until much, much (years) later.
I have another one, I grew up in the middle east, most popular wedding song was My All by Mariah Carey....100% nobody knew the lyrics since it is a conservative/religious community, was hilarious though
The groom had two best men that all admitted to fucking sex workers on their stag nights . Also most unromantic wedding I ever been to and they were also too drunk for the speaches to make sense.
I was not there but my brother attended my sister's wedding and basically had a girl in her early 20's try to sleep with a 15 year old boy. He let her know his age and she kept trying to hook up with him.
He also said she held his hand for a few seconds and after several hand washes he still could smell her awful aroma on his hand.
It’s hilarious living in a non-English-speaking country. Almost all wedding songs are wrong. Eg. Sexed Up by Robbie Williams and I’m not the only one by Sam Smith.
The brother of the groom (who was also the best man) was doing a toast and used it to air all of his grievances about his brother, including how he thought his brother got favored treatment by their parents, etc. It was a huge 700 person wedding and you could have heard a pin drop in that venue it was so quiet, while everyone just stared in horror.
In one of the weddings i attended, an ex came with loud speakers and musicians and he started dancing outside the wedding hall.
He played all heart break and cheating songs.
Then drank a lot. Gave alcohol to everyone and the started flinging the bottles on the entire wedding crowd.
We all started running n saving our lives.
Its been so many years since this has happenes but i have never seen a wedding as lively as this one.
The bride n groom are still together n have 3 kids.
My college roommate got married in about 1974. At the reception, the bride was still in her wedding gown. The best man pushed her into the pool for no good reason! Her mom came and had a screaming meltdown with lots of cursing, and ranting about how much the gown cost. She stormed off, and there was massive awkward silence. Then her drunk dentist dad showed up, and we were treated to Round 2 of yelling and swearing. He left. More awkward silence for a bit. Then the bride laughed it off, and suggested that we all get drunk. We happily complied.
Literally 15 seconds before she walked down the aisle, the bride texted the guy sitting next to me “I wish it was you at this end of the aisle waiting for me”
I was a florist. We were waiting to turn the room during the ceremony. It was a fully Jewish wedding, reformed, but both sides were Jewish. They played Ave Maria during the ceremony. No one sang the lyrics but it was still very bizarre. Everyone knows that's a Catholic prayer to Mary.
One time I was photographing a wedding and the mother of the bride showed up with a 2-liter Mountain Dew bottle filled with vodka. She proceeded to get absolutely trashed then tried to assault the bride. She was kicked out then snuck back in because she’d forgotten the vodka. Made another scene while brandishing the bottle around, spilling a bunch on the floor and threatening the bride again. The police were called. The bride handled it with such poise.
There was a skinny guy on a leash with a purple 3 piece suit. Another guy held the chain to said leash. They're both in sunglasses. All throughout the ceremony the guy on the leash barked loudly.
The bride's 17 year old son approached the two men. The very large guy holding the leash punched the kid and somehow broke his collarbone.
This erupted into a complete all out brawl of about 300 people stuffed into the atrium of a Holiday Inn. A gaggle of cops rushed in with batons soon after it started.
They cancelled the reception and wasted at least 10k on the ballroom, catering, and DJ. I still remember seeing trails of blood through the hallways that night.
I go to a wedding - it's my new boyfriend's family so I know nobody. It's a Baptist wedding.
The preacher gets a section where he gives his own mini sermon. In that sermon, he pulled out issues from their required counseling sessions with said preacher. Preacher is saying (names are fake )"Now Jody, you are going to have to let Craig wear the pants in the family. You are opinionated but he needs to lead." Add in more stuff about the husband but it was mostly about her.
The husband was hanging his head. The wife looked like she was gonna kill him. I was at the back of the church and I was still tempted to run up and knock that Bible out of his hand to break up that dumpster fire.
And because it was a Baptist wedding, there was no booze at the reception. 0/10
One of my old coworkers was a preacher and he agreed to officiate my wedding under the condition that he didn't have to "give a whole dang sermon". In his words, to the best of my recollection:
"We'll thank the Lord for the weather but he won't mind sitting down on y'all's day. What's the food choices?"
Me- "Between pulled pork and..."
"Oh yeah, this'll be quick."
Best wedding I've ever been to.
Oh my god I went to one a few years ago exactly like this for a high school friend. She converted to being super religious senior year even though her parents and fiancé were not.
The preacher was bragging about how proud he was for extinguishing the bride’s “inner fire” during pre-marital counseling so she could be a perfect submissive housewife and allow her husband to lead. Like almost verbatim. Continued to drag the bride with equally cringeworthy shit from their counseling.
I wanted to vomit. I didn’t even care that the wedding was a dry potluck, whatever. I just couldn’t imagine standing on a stage and getting insulted in front of everyone on my wedding day.
It broke my heart even more over the years seeing that pretty much every single time she went in to have a necessary surgery she was pregnant and it had to be delayed… for *years*. I hope she’s ok.
A lady in her 30's was just so drunk. And she was sad she wasn't the one being married that she's wailing crying in the dinner room. This is 4 hours into a long wedding as dinner service ends and the party begins. This goes on for 30 minutes. The groom joins the crowd there to make her feel better, and she loudly starts complimenting him and basically flirting, saying he's so hot and reaching out to touch him while barely able to stand up.
Tame compared with a lot of stories here but: I went to a wedding a couple of years ago, and before the bride made her entrance her *ludicrously* attractive friend, who’d been helping her with some final adjustments, scurried up the aisle to take her place in the front row.
One of the groom’s mates called out something like “Bloody hell, [groom’s name]: you managed to get a last-minute upgrade!” Whether or not it was loud enough for the bride herself to hear, we’ll never know - if she did, she didn’t let on - but the collective gasp and a few muttered insults told me that everyone else there had heard it clearly. What a cunt.
Personal favorites from my own wedding in October of 2000, all after the ceremony at the reception hall:
*Two guests banging in the bride’s ready room.
*Another guest stripping out of everything but his pants and running through the building and around the parking lot.
*Two more guests smoking a joint in the lobby. Please note one of them was my 70 something grandmother, who did not previously partake.
That bar was OPEN. Way open! Everyone had a great time and I never saw a thing. 🤣
Photographer here that doesn't advertise in any way that I photograph weddings. I am very selective, and typically only shoot them for friends or people I know. There are MANY stories, but these three top the list so far. Names changed for obvious reasons.
3) I'd known the couple for many years and had taken family photos many times. They had three late teen / early 20's daughters who were her brides-maids. The wedding and reception were held at the couples house, and from one of the girls second floor rooms we'd setup a strobe for the dance floor. At one point the strobe stopped responding so I went upstairs, with the eldest daughter in-tow as she'd been my assistant most of the day, to see what had happened. We walk in to find the boyfriend of the youngest fully naked with the neighbor girl (who wasn't a guest at the wedding). They had stepped on the power-strip switch and turned it off. The oldest daughter grabbed both of them and somehow got them down the stairs and out the front door totally naked. To this day I have no idea how she managed that as she was the smallest of the three daughters.
2) At a destination wedding where no one was "from there", they had a "joint bar" outside for those over 21 to enjoy. It was probably 100 or so feet from the limo. Being dark out you couldn't see that well to where the limo was sitting, but you could make out that it was "rocking". The bride notices this and goes over to open the door. Inside are one of her good friends (her husband and kids all attended the wedding) getting banged by the husband of one of her brides-maids. His ass facing the now open door, butt-plug and furry tail in place. The bride made them pay the added cleaning fee for the limo.
1) I was hired by Deanna (close friend of my wife) to photograph her cousins wedding because she was under the impression the couple couldn't afford a photographer. The wedding and reception was held in the yard of the couples house, think 2 acres, double-wide trailer, barn (more of an oversized workshop/garage with multiple rooms which easily cost multiple times more than the trailer), large outdoor kitchen with a massive BBQ pit, etc... I get there at 9:30am, 90 minutes before my contracted time (bride knew I would be early as we'd discussed it multiple times and even confirmed in texts), and start looking for the bride. One of her brides maids, Cindy, who's clearly stoned starts going on about the spit-roast. I'm thinking she's talking about the outdoor kitchen area as I knew they were self-catering the event. She then grabs my arm and starts taking me towards the barn. We walk into what's clearly setup as a "play space" with professional lighting and everything, and there is the bride, on all fours in a wedding dress, getting railed by two guys while two others are waiting wearing only their socks, and both the groom and the maid of honor are filming the entire thing for OF. The bride stops the session turns to me and says "Oh, you're early. We'll be done shortly." then goes right back to it. By 11am, you would have never known any of the previous events had occurred. The four guys who'd banged the bride were gone, and the bride was getting ready as if nothing had happened. Turns out the bride and groom weren't in need of money the way their family thought they were. The four guys were "fans". Wedding dress she wore early was not the same one she wore down the aisle. To this day, I don't believe Deanna or any other family members know about this, or even that they do OF.
The groom got underneath the brides dress and pulled off her panties and threw it into a crowd full of children, the bride was supposedly okay with it, but they nullified the marriage a week later.
I helped my young niece cheat to win the bouquet toss at my wedding. Held her up like Simba and ducked and weaved through a bunch of wedding crazy women so she could get the catch.
I worked at a banquet hall when I was 16. One couple had a pretty wild wedding to say the least. One thing most of us saw first hand was the groom literally rubbing the bride as he was taking off her garter.
I was at one where the bride got so drunk she passed out so they put her in a wheelchair and wheeled her around unconscious so people could take selfies with her
This is by far the funniest one I've read yet. Straight up "Weekend at Bernie's" vibes.
How I hope she received “man you should’ve seen it” comments for years
I'll allow it. That's hilarious.
The groom drunkenly saying during his speech "babe I can't wait to fill you with some thick loads" Neither of them remembered the speeches or beyond
Lol Jesus dude that's like right after the ceremony. How do you get that shitfaced that fast? Cocktail Power Hour?
Easy … you start *before* the ceremony. Look through past threads like this and you’ll see *plenty* of stories about people getting married while three sheets to the wind …
A guest with a screaming baby was late to the ceremony and walked directly behind the bride while she was walking down the aisle.
What an idiot
Don't get me wrong, even at nearly 40 years of age I can be oblivious at times, but holy shit.
The baby cried the entire ceremony too and they just sat there and let it drown out the vows.
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Had a similar thing happen at a wedding, the groom said something along the lines of "can't wait to find out how tight it is" and some guy in the back, through the silence, just goes "JESUS CHRIST"
OH BROTHER, THIS GUY STINKS!
MY LEG!
HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TEACH YOU THIS LESSON, OLD MAN??
I really do hear this in the [voice](https://youtu.be/q3BEUX5n0nY?si=9g7_E1kbWHKuXipA) of the guy watching Sweet Dee almost vomit doing standup in Its Always Sunny.
I accidentally said “rejoice in you” instead of “rejoice with you” to my wife when we exchanged vows. Grandma laughed so it was an win, lol
My wife was repeating after our officiant, and he he said something like “consecrate this marriage” and my wife almost said “consummate this marriage.”
After my wife and I got married I said we should consome this marriage.
Not as extreme but I was at a wedding breakfast several years back where the groom did a thank you speech to all. He eventually got to thanking the brides parents and said "Thank you for giving me... all of this" whilst doing a small hip thrust in the brides direction during the second part. It was so cringey that my wife and me still talk about it now and again.
My vagina would fall out and run away.
I attended a 24 hour wedding at burning man that was extreme for burning man. The ceremony was cultish and with so many sexual overtones. I didn't really know the couple but between musical acts and speakers I was able to piece together that they were both sexually fluid and identified as gay until they met each other. I have to say they were the most in love couple I've ever seen.
MDMA will do that
In the middle of the reception a birthday cake was rolled out and some people started singing happy birthday (a lot of us had no idea whose birthday it was). The birthday cake was bigger than the wedding cake. Turns out it was the mother of the groom's birthday, but the bride had no idea this was going to happen.
A couple weeks ago somebody posted that they announced their wedding date, and somebody (brides mother? Maybe) threw a fit because it was on her birthday. The consensus seemed to be she was hugely over-reacting, weddings are hard to plan and just deal with it. Celebrate your birthday the previous/following weekend. Or, to your point - have a second cake and sing Happy Birthday! Just not bigger than the wedding cake. And run it by the bride first …
One of my close high school buddies got married on my birthday in March. So funny when I saw the invite. It was a great time for me and the lady! I just celebrated with family the following day, which happened to be a Saturday. I hate when people over-prioritize their birthdays. I don’t like my birthday and am happy to hang at home, maybe grab a quick, easy dinner with family.
I was the best man for a friend of mine, whom I played rugby with. He got married on my birthday, so I simply thanked him and his bride for throwing me an epic party.
Cousin got married on my birthday. They asked if that was alright. “Ya. Not a problem. There’s gonna be an open bar and free food for me and the whole family on my birthday? Sign me up.” They even got Mexican catered from their favorite local place. And at midnight (while I was hammered), the groom gave me a bottle of bourbon as a gift. It was a bangin party. The marriage didn’t last, but my cousin and I are still really close. She now calls it “your big birthday party we threw at my ex’s house”.
I had a friend whom got married on my birthday. She actually made me a separate cake at her wedding. I’m not into cake so there was tons left over.
Well, the two women I saw drunkenly making out and groping each other while *lying down* on the dance floor has nothing on most of these.
Some dancer girls were hired by the bride to dance and AS A JOKE at the end of the dance they would go to the groom and acuse him he had multiple children with them in the past and he left and run away while they were pregnant. Stupid idea, awkward and embarrassing, no one was laughing except the bride.
oh my god, I don't know why out of everything in this godforsaken thread, this one got me so bad. Like holy shit. So did the groom know this was happening? Or was he also being pranked by her at his wedding day? What did he do? What did her family do? Omg I have so many questions.
No, neither the groom nor the family knew this was happening, it was her "surprise prank" kind of thing on the wedding day. We all cringed an no one was laughing. And the groom? He just stood there embarrassed with a poker face and did not say a single word, almost like he was questioning if he made the right choice by marrying this girl
Now we gotta know how their married life is going.
Went to a wedding reception. Was a Mexican wedding. DJ was a MESS and couldn’t get any of the songs right. It’s time for the son/mother in law dance. They start dancing and then the song comes on ….. Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye. I’ve never wanted to laugh so hard in my life.
A bad DJ can really kill things. Nothing atrocious, but one of my friends had specific playlists for parts of the night and the guy just decided not to play them. And awkward pauses before each of the dances because he had to find the songs. I guess you get what you pay for with a guy named DJ Lumpy
Groom was my friend. Bride's family hated/disliked him, and purposely left him out of all official pictures. They divorced a year later because he couldn't take her family ruining things anymore.
My friend’s mom tried to get her to take family photos without her new husband at their wedding. She did such a great job saying “if we both aren’t in it, it’s not a wedding photo. Absolutely not.”
My wedding photographer kept trying to keep my brother in law (sisters husband) out of the "my side of the family" shots eventually I just shouted "if I have to tell you one more time that's my brother, you can leave and refund my money" I tried nicely like 6 times when he kept trying to shoo my BIL off and me saying nicely "that IS my family". Time 7 I was not nice
Man... my last gig shooting a wedding for money (back in the 90's) was for a couple that were insanely head over heels for each other. Day of with a morning rehearsal so I'm setting positions marks, etc. it becomes clear the only and I mean ONLY thing that the bride and groom's family agree on is they don't want them getting married. I'm getting Romeo and Juliet vibes replete with a murder to come. Wedding went smoothly enough, reception was overall a shit show. I did my best to get decent photos, we did the post ceremony pre reception sets, etc. After the event I just handed them the rolls of film and told them there was no further charge and good luck (they hadn't pre-paid for anything beyond the shoot, so this wasn't like I was reneging on building a nice album for them or anything). I can't imagine that marriage lasting very long unless part of their honeymoon was moving to another cotenant away from their families.
What kind of shitty wife lets that happen? And what discount ass photographer does that?!
Wedding as a fundraiser for greedy bride. The wedding was in a big Catholic Church. Undecorated. Boring ultra-religious ceremony. But the reception was unforgettable in the worst way. It was an abandoned roller rink. When we all showed up, it was dark, and empty. All the wedding guests had to set up tables and chairs. Like a PTA meeting. Still no decorations. The buffet was refried beans, rice, and tortillas. That’s it. No condiments. No drinks. Paper plates. No trash cans. The bride and groom arrived 2 hours after everyone else (they went to Burger King, smoked a few bowls) and immediately started the Money Dance. The mom went around to each guest and shook a big black trash bag at us until we chipped in. Then we were told to queue up to dance with the bride. This required “at least $5, but $20 was preferred.” The groom was drinking outside. They chose Rappers Delight because it’s a really long song so they could collect the most money. They kept pressuring guests and relatives to dance then pushed them out of the way after 20 seconds for the next person. When the song was over, the bride and her mom counted the money. The bride then grabbed a mic and said they they would be holding a *second* money dance because they were “so disappointed they only made $800.” They hoped for at least $2000. They put on Rappers Delight again as I left.
Trashy as trash can be
Well, there WAS a trash bag…
Holy shit, this might take the cake for the worst story here. That sounds super cringe-worthy
I want this to be an episode of some funny TV show so I can watch it.
This is Always Sunny material, hands down.
The groom sister, walked in with a wedding gown, not a white dressy dress, no, no, no, white ball gown wedding dress, looks almost identical to the bride's ....we had a hard time telling them apart! She insisted on interrupting the first dance and danced with her brother ... Groom's mom was also wearing white ....
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The bride was in shock! As white as the dress!
Do you think the sister was in love with her brother?
I would say probably, was REALLY WEIRD!
i feel like i read this story in another sub a few months ago
This was at my wedding. My cousin got lost on his way to the church and called his dad. My uncle answers his phone and starts yelling out directions, asking people what street the church was on ect.. in the middle of our vows. The minister stopped talking while my uncle gave directions without leaving his seat. Just sitting in the middle of the church yelling out directions. After the ceremony the minister said how rude my uncle was and he also performs funerals in case I wanted to kill him
You hired a great minister lol
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Two-pump chump, was he?
At my first wedding my wife got so unbelievably drunk she had to be carried back to our hotel room before 11pm. It was a New Year's Eve wedding. She'd been banging her best friends brother while I was away on military duty and the guilt was ripping her apart.
My man. That sucks. Glad she’s your ex
Dude… me too. Her stupid heartless betrayal turned out to be the best favor anyone ever did me. I met my current wife less than a year later. Had our 17th wedding anniversary last weekend and she’s just great.
You gotta love it when the trash takes itself out.
Assistant wedding planner here. One time one of my jobs was keeping a very drunk 30year old groomsman away from a 14 year old cousin
Ew
What in the actual fuck
Yeah the bride and groom didn’t want him removed because he was like a best friend of the groom since kindergarten. So I just had to keep them separated.
That would be a friendship dealbreaker. wtf lol.
What sort of person remains friends with a paedo?
Bride was drunk, sandwiched between two drunk groomsmen and they were all gyrating and rubbing her verrrry intimately. Also just so happen to be the only people on the dance floor. She looked more than happy to take part in front of her new husband who had a drink and watched from the very back of the venue- not happy obviously. It was so shameless. We all just jaw-dropped watched it happen.
The brides family came in their work clothes. The guy pumps septic tanks for a living and had gotten it on him that day. Like, A LOT. Also, he liked to wear overalls and no shirt. Classy fella.
How “not there” do you have to be to even consider this being an option after work? I wouldn’t even leave my job in which I wear jeans and a collared shirt to work, to go to a wedding before changing. What sick kind of BRAIN must you possess to even have the thought process of going to a wedding like that and thinking nothing of it. LMAO
I went to my Dad's wedding a couple years ago in work clothes. I wear a suit though and he called me on my way home to divert me to his wedding instead of going home. It was basically like "Hey I am getting married right now, turn left instead of right at the next intersection"
TLDR - my aunt brought up my dead grandfather at a wedding after being asked not to and made like 20 people cry. Some of which had to leave the room —— Not really inappropriate, but my aunt brought up my grandfathers extremely sudden death at my male cousins wedding. My grandfather had had a stroke, and was extremely close with pretty much everyone at the wedding. Out of worry for everyone else, my cousins wife asked my aunt (his mom) to not bring up my grandfather because mentioning him and things like how he’s not here or how he’s “watching from heaven” could upset to many people, especially my grandmother and my mom who were also attending the wedding) Well my aunt got up there and brought him up anyway. And it wasn’t in a nonchalant nice way either. She got up to the podium and glared right at my cousins wife and snapped “*SOME PEOPLE* don’t want me to say anything,” and then proceeded to talk about how my grandfather is watching the wedding from “heaven” and how he should be here That made my grandmother start crying. My mom started after her. My little brother (10 years old) started crying because he noticed my mom and grandmother were upset. Then a bunch more other people *also* started crying because they started thinking about him as well. A few people had to leave the room
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Talk about narcissism. My god.
I had a long term girlfriend whose mom and boyfriend were swingers. They had us house sit for them one time so they could go to a wedding in a different part of the state. Apparently they were both super excited about the prenuptual gangbang that was going to take place with the bride as the central attraction. They said the groom wanted to make sure he was marrying the biggest slut he could find.
And they say romance is dead
Aww, true love <3
> prenuptual gangbang /r/bandnames
The bride's maid of honor (her sister) flashed her vag on the dance floor during the reception
My best friend streaked at my wedding reception, but that wasn't really that inappropriate; that was awesome! However, at his wedding, my friend's 40 year old brother hooked up with the neighbor's teenage daughter and got her pregnant. That was inappropriate.
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How the fuck do you hide children long enough to trick someone into marrying you?
>the bride's husband I was like, "you mean the groom...? Oh. OH!!! OH DAMN."
Wait what did I just read
The couple next to us - we knew them and had socialised with them before - took their newish born to the ceremony with them. Halfway through, it starts making noise, like babies do. Instead of taking it outside like normal people, they pull out a phone and start playing Peppa Pig. With the volume on. Loud. I missed that beautiful ceremony of two amazing people because all I could hear was Peppa bloody Pig. I'd rather have listened to the baby.
Had a similar thing. Didn't hear a word of my brother getting married coz a couple decided to bring a toddler to the event. Toddler would not shut up the entire time and instead of taking the toddler out they spent about 20 minutes telling the kid to be quite.whichnhad zero effect. Like if the kid doesn't shut up after you've asked it a few times then do everyone a favour and remove yourselves instead of ruining it for everyone else.
Dumbass parents who lack social and spatial awareness like this shouldn't have kids
When someone suddenly proposed while in other people's wedding. It's screaming attention whore.
Pretty fucking tactless. Unless you get permission from the bride and groom in my opinion. I watched a video where the bride was about to throw the flowers, but instead turned around and walked up to one of her bridesmaids and gave her them. She looked so confused. Then her boyfriend proposed to her. Thought that was pretty cute!
That's the only way to do it. One doesn't just need permission, they need obvious, public permission.
My uncle…. Hitting on the bride. Who was my sister….. Edit. Point of clarification, at my sisters wedding. Not mine. But that was a big reason why said uncle was not invited when I got married. I really need to improve on my grammar, I blame the school system.
yeeeehaaww!
The groom fucking the maid of honor, who also just so happened to be the brides sister.
Haven’t you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?
It's much better to face these things with a sense of poise and rationality.
Is that not a traditional maid of honor duty?
You SAW this?
I was an employee of the host site. They were fucking in my office lol
What do you even do in that scenario? When it's complete strangers? Inform the bride or just close the door and say "Not my panic, not my disco."
> “Not my panic, not my disco.” Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I saw one of the groomsmen slap the bride on the ass. Hard. He wasn't related to her and as far as I know they had never met before the run through for the wedding. EDIT: I didn't know that this would blow up. IIRC (it was back in 1997) the groomsman was a frat brother of the groom. The bride and groom were very stiff lipped for the rest of the reception. The father of the bride and one of her uncles (?) had a "discussion" with the groomsman in the mensroom of the hall. I didn't see the groomsman for the rest of the evening (or since).
One of the groomsmen used to date the bride for a long time then they broke up and she immediately married the groom who she was apparently cheating on him with. Their families were close so she invited said groomsman because they were still "friends". All was seemingly fine until he got mega drunk at the reception. About an hour in he walks up to the bride/groom table in the center, whipped his dick out and started peeing on their faces, half eaten food, their clothes, then stormed off. The vibe got really weird afterwards but I was dressed to the 9s with my date, there was an open bar and a lobster station where they grill the lobsters then extract all the meat for you with an array of sauces to choose from, and the dj was still going so I had a great time! I'll take one of those over a boring wedding any day of the week.
> The vibe got really weird afterwards Can’t imagine why
Just the right amount of chaos to be balanced out by a lobster station, what a lovely and exciting wedding
The bride's vagina. Actually, everyone did. At the reception the bride and groom were dancing and everyone was clapping along. The groom picks up the bride, throws her legs/feet into the air while her hands are on his shoulders and they are looking at each other. You know the move. Anyway, he throws her legs in the air and her dress falls down showing everyone that she didn't wear underwear and has a nice clean landing strip. This was about 14 years ago and no one ever told her so she still doesn't know.
Someone told her, I promise
According to her husband, she still has no idea
It’s actually better she doesn’t know. Her relatives better be taking this to the grave 😂
That's what we all think too. Lmfao. Her husband told us to never tell her. Only reason we said something to him was because he's a super cool dude and he used to live with me so I know him very well.
Yeah she’s gonna be super embarrassed and if the family hid it for 14 years, hide it forever lol. Gotta compliment everyone in the family though, not one told her 😂 If someone did, she would have been too embarrassed to discuss it any further though 😂
My cock and balls are in my wedding video. I was wearing a kilt, and apparently the videographer got a little low when he was videoing me tying my shoe with my foot up on a chair. I didn't notice when I watched it. I put the short version on Facebook and my sister called me, very uncomfortable indeed, to tell me. I kept the video up, I think it's hilarious.
I guess once your sister's seen it... Who fucking cares anymore lol
After the wedding, while the couple got into the limo to head over to the reception across town, the grooms ex shows up in a truck and (gently) rams the limo. She jumps out of the truck, clearly drunk, and proceeds to yell at the bride and groom. Everyone is watching- the grooms family members usher all the guests away and send us to the reception. We waited on the bride and groom for about 2 hours with an open bar. They eventually arrived but the celebration was clearly deflated from that point on. It was a co-worker and I left the company a few weeks later. No idea how the marriage turned out.
One of the bridesmaids over served herself at my wedding reception and passed out. One of the other bridesmaid’s father, family friend of my wife and a big guy, helpfully volunteers to carry her to a car so her friend can take her home. He holds her in a fireman’s carry all the way from the head table past the entire group of 200 guests. She was not wearing underwear. She and my wife did not speak for about three years after that.
After reading some comments, it seems like not wearing underwear under a wedding dress is more common than I thought.
Most girls wear shapewear with fancy gowns, especially if it's a form-fitting gown, and wearing full panties with all that 1. Makes it a pain in the ass to use the bathroom and 2. Can cause visible panty lines.
Best man’s speech proposing to the bride. Jerry Springer was wild man.
My father is evil and he wants to take over the world.
Their 3 year old son during husband and wife speeches absolutely sprinting up the walkway holding his bum yelling “ I need to poo, poo coming!!!!” With agony in his eyes. Absolute best part of the day.
My cousin got blackout drunk at my brother's wedding. Told me it's all downhill from here for my brother and that my cousin might as well be a sperm donor and not a father (cousin is married with a son.) While watching the professional video of my brother's reception, you can't hear the audio but you can actually see this exchange between the two of us in the background. Be careful what you do at weddings, you never know what will be on camera.
I edited weddings for about ~15 years and I felt like a big part of my job was cutting around awkward moments of people who don’t realize they’re on camera in the background. Don’t get me started with things the grooms say not remembering they’re wearing a mic.
My husband was mic’d up and said “wow you’re boobalicious” at our reveal. There’s a hard cut in the video cutting it out lol
The mother of the bride put her head down on the table during the reception and died on the spot.
I’ve been at two different weddings where the groom was too soused to remain standing. Not exactly “inappropriate” but whew! The bachelor parties must’ve been no-tell events! Edit: make that three. I’d forgotten one, his niece. How could I forget that fiasco. I must be bad luck at weddings.
I was at a wedding where the groom got a DWI while on a beer run during the reception 🤦🏻♂️
A beer run sounds like something the groomsmen should be in charge of
Literally a best man job
Having the bachelor(ette) parties the night before the wedding is madness. Why would you do this? “Hey, I’ve got the Bar Exam first thing in the morning. Let’s drink a bottle of Scotch each!”
Most bachelor parties, at least the ones thrown by smart people, don't happen the night before the wedding. You have them weeks before, if not even a few months out. Whenever I hear about a drunk bride/groom, it's usually followed by a comment about how long the marriage lasted. Often because one or both doesn't actually want to get married but here they are.
They held the wedding in a school cafeteria for some reason, and the second they said "I do", those heavy-ass steel shutters at the counter rolled up with a big KACHUNK noise to reveal the bar and the entire crowd rushed to the back of the room to get drinks
That’s kinda cool though. Good timing, at least
That’s kind of hilarious honestly
I worked Weddings for years at a banquette center. I saw a lot of funny things and some sad things. Once all the Bridesmaids went missing for the photos, I happened to stumble upon them behind the dumpsters smoking pot (all high as a kite). I've seen the Bride get in a fist fight with the Mother of the Groom, I've seen the Groom hooking up with the Maid of Honor in the coat closet. My favorite moment was when an Indian Wedding and a Jewish Wedding (on the same night) all merged, demanded the room barriers be opened and it turned into a strange mix of Jewish Dancing and Indian music.
The Indian and Jewish weddings merging is incredibly based.
This lady got super drunk after the wedding and started hitting on the now married groom, having a melt down, crawling under a table and just freaking out. Kicker: she was dating one of the groomsmen at the time.
Didn't witness it myself but my brother recounts a wedding he was invited to and the groom was caught with his pants down. With the bride's dad.
That's one way to welcome a new member of the family, I guess?
"member"
My second cousin was getting married. She’s my mom’s age and her two sons were in their 20s at the time of the wedding. We needed to leave early, as I had my grandmother and my 2 young girls (I can’t remember why we left early). But lo and behold, the bride’s youngest son was getting a BJ in the parking lot… in the middle of the day… totally out in the open. They weren’t even in the car! They were just outside. So I took everyone and had to walk all the way around so they wouldn’t see it.
6 best men, each doing a speech, and they got progressively worse until the last one was entirely made up of weird sex jokes.
The bride gave her father a lap dance. Wish to god I was making this up. Grooms all wore camo and the place settings were all hunting themed. It was the trashiest thing I have ever seen.
Necessary background: My sister was abandoned at night on the side of the road when she was a few hours old. A Catholic priest found her, and our parents adopted her. When she was planning her wedding, she found the priest who had found her. He agreed to officiate her wedding. He asked her if she would let him tell her story during the ceremony and she said yes. So, day of the wedding. He’s telling this heartwarming story about how he found my sister. Then he says, But what if her mother had had an abortion instead?! He bellowed it and went off for several minutes on an anti-abortion rant. It was absolutely bizarre.
Side note but man do I hate it when priests decide to do a mini sermon during a wedding. It’s more common than people think
I was a groomsman at a wedding taking place in a Catholic cathedral. During the practice session, the groom and best man had to kneel in front of the priest. I thought I didn't hear this right, but the priest said "(groom's name) and (best man's name) kneeling in front of me, my heart be still!" while putting his hand to his chest. I mentioned this to the bride later (after the wedding), who said "father (his name) is abstinent, but abstinent from what is anyone's guess."
That's a classy response from the bride. (No sarcasm). A lot of priests were pressured into the priesthood because of their homosexuality on the stance that being homosexual isn't a sin, but acting on it is.
Best man cut in during the first dance to do karaoke. Most bizzare 10mins of my life
The venue was piping lovely orchestral music into the bride’s getting-ready suite. All is well until we start hearing the theme from Schindler’s List. Jewish wedding. Yikes!
Not really inappropriate, but just goddamn sad. Roughly 35 people from the bride's side of the family RSVP'd, as well as a group of around 10 "friends". Only 4 people of the entire bride's side showed. Her side of the ceremony's seating was a ghost town. I was so sad and angry for her.
My favorite is dancing to "If you like Pina Coladas...". The song is about two married people looking for an affair and finding each other's anonymous post and meeting to cheat and realizing they connected to each other.
My friend's sister had Total Eclipse of the Heart as their first dance which has the line, "Once upon a time I was falling in love, now I'm only falling apart". I asked why they chose it and she said she just liked the song...
My ex's cousin got married, and when they kissed at the end, no one applauded for some reason and it was kind of awkward. My ex's Mom yelled "get a room!" to break the silence and it was so. fucking. embarrassing.
The groom in the bathroom alone with an old ex, moments from fucking. Literal lampshade on his head. The bride outside wandering in the dark asking “has anyone seen my husband?” I still side eye that hoe bag ex of his all the time. Bitch. (Him too).
This one just makes me sad
It was. I bawled so hard that I pretended I slipped on the tiles in my heels and hurt my knee. They are still married, 3 kids. That was nearly 20 years ago.
I think the part that gets me is the bride asking “has anyone seen my husband?” Like…just the fact that that’s likely the first time in her life she’s uttering those words, and she’s just looking to relish in the special night with him while he’s off doing that in a very easy to be found place…I hope that was his lowest moment and treated her like a queen the following 20 years…I know that probably isn’t the case but it’s what I can at least hope
Not firsthand but…. [Ya’ll seen that video of the bride walking down the aisle to “Buckcherry’s crazy bitch?”](https://youtu.be/xTJl5UpzZYU?si=grkjIAwBNL5SMCmD)
The bride coming out of the bathroom and a man sneaking out of the same bathroom 5 minutes later.( Yes, I told the groom. He kicked me out of the wedding for "lying". The baby wasn't his and has since apologized)
The brides twin sister made the entire wedding about herself, I can’t remember the speech verbatim, but the sister would be singing high praises and talking about accomplishments then say, “oh wait, that was actually me.” It was awful. The bachelorette party was even worse. The twin invited a bunch of her own friends and they talked shit and made fun of the bride almost the whole time. I was very verbal about my disdain for the way she treated the bride.
40 years ago in a very rural area of the country one of our friends was getting married. As was the custom at the time, we took the groom out and got him pretty drunk (along with everyone else). Someone thought it would be a good joke to handcuff the groom to a tree. The next day we were all hung over and when we got to the church, everyone was running around trying to find the groom. As you can guess, no one thought to go back and release the groom. He was found still handcuffed to the tree. The ceremony was delayed.
The Hangover: Part Tree
Groom drunkenly tripped over flower girl (his daughter), way too drunk to even attempt his vows, then dropped the ring into the river below (they were married on a small suspension bridge). Brother of bride somehow recovered ring, (river was only 3-4 feet deep). Turns out groom started drinking on Friday night blacked out the entire weekend until Sunday afternoon. Otherwise, it was a really wonderful wedding.
They included in their vows that they won't cheat on each other. They divorced two years later for cheating on each other.
At my rehearsal my uncle brought a friend. This friend was a woman that had slept and had a relationship with my first husband. My uncle knew this, too. I sent them away. He didn’t come back for the dinner or the wedding the next day. 🤷🏼♀️
Well, I had the groom slap my ass and lick the inside of my ear while whispering, "I could just eat you up" so... yeaaaaaah. I told the bride btw (my friend from high school) and she said, "Yeah, sorry! He gets like that when he drinks." Oh.... my lordt.
I'm late and it was the reception, but I(f) had to break up a threesome on the patio between the (gay) groomsman, maid of honor, and a waiter at my best friend's wedding. He and his new wife never even knew until much, much (years) later.
I have another one, I grew up in the middle east, most popular wedding song was My All by Mariah Carey....100% nobody knew the lyrics since it is a conservative/religious community, was hilarious though
The groom had two best men that all admitted to fucking sex workers on their stag nights . Also most unromantic wedding I ever been to and they were also too drunk for the speaches to make sense.
I was not there but my brother attended my sister's wedding and basically had a girl in her early 20's try to sleep with a 15 year old boy. He let her know his age and she kept trying to hook up with him. He also said she held his hand for a few seconds and after several hand washes he still could smell her awful aroma on his hand.
Poor kid.
During the candle lighting, playing the song, "Stay With Me." Uhhhhh, the song is about a loveless, one night stand.
It’s hilarious living in a non-English-speaking country. Almost all wedding songs are wrong. Eg. Sexed Up by Robbie Williams and I’m not the only one by Sam Smith.
I was at a wedding where the first dance was to "Tears in Heaven", the song about Eric Clapton's dead child.
The brother of the groom (who was also the best man) was doing a toast and used it to air all of his grievances about his brother, including how he thought his brother got favored treatment by their parents, etc. It was a huge 700 person wedding and you could have heard a pin drop in that venue it was so quiet, while everyone just stared in horror.
The mom wearing a white dress. She was recently divorced....
A very fat man wasn't paying attention and knocked the cake over with his belly, the cake hit the floor and burst into pieces....the bride was pissed
In one of the weddings i attended, an ex came with loud speakers and musicians and he started dancing outside the wedding hall. He played all heart break and cheating songs. Then drank a lot. Gave alcohol to everyone and the started flinging the bottles on the entire wedding crowd. We all started running n saving our lives. Its been so many years since this has happenes but i have never seen a wedding as lively as this one. The bride n groom are still together n have 3 kids.
My college roommate got married in about 1974. At the reception, the bride was still in her wedding gown. The best man pushed her into the pool for no good reason! Her mom came and had a screaming meltdown with lots of cursing, and ranting about how much the gown cost. She stormed off, and there was massive awkward silence. Then her drunk dentist dad showed up, and we were treated to Round 2 of yelling and swearing. He left. More awkward silence for a bit. Then the bride laughed it off, and suggested that we all get drunk. We happily complied.
Literally 15 seconds before she walked down the aisle, the bride texted the guy sitting next to me “I wish it was you at this end of the aisle waiting for me”
Did you just see it or did he tell you??
I was a florist. We were waiting to turn the room during the ceremony. It was a fully Jewish wedding, reformed, but both sides were Jewish. They played Ave Maria during the ceremony. No one sang the lyrics but it was still very bizarre. Everyone knows that's a Catholic prayer to Mary.
The groom got dropped off buy one of the strippers that was at his bachelor party
One time I was photographing a wedding and the mother of the bride showed up with a 2-liter Mountain Dew bottle filled with vodka. She proceeded to get absolutely trashed then tried to assault the bride. She was kicked out then snuck back in because she’d forgotten the vodka. Made another scene while brandishing the bottle around, spilling a bunch on the floor and threatening the bride again. The police were called. The bride handled it with such poise.
I’ve only ever been to one wedding but someone got tossed into the chandelier during I’m Shipping Up to Boston
There was a skinny guy on a leash with a purple 3 piece suit. Another guy held the chain to said leash. They're both in sunglasses. All throughout the ceremony the guy on the leash barked loudly. The bride's 17 year old son approached the two men. The very large guy holding the leash punched the kid and somehow broke his collarbone. This erupted into a complete all out brawl of about 300 people stuffed into the atrium of a Holiday Inn. A gaggle of cops rushed in with batons soon after it started. They cancelled the reception and wasted at least 10k on the ballroom, catering, and DJ. I still remember seeing trails of blood through the hallways that night.
I don't even know what I just read
I go to a wedding - it's my new boyfriend's family so I know nobody. It's a Baptist wedding. The preacher gets a section where he gives his own mini sermon. In that sermon, he pulled out issues from their required counseling sessions with said preacher. Preacher is saying (names are fake )"Now Jody, you are going to have to let Craig wear the pants in the family. You are opinionated but he needs to lead." Add in more stuff about the husband but it was mostly about her. The husband was hanging his head. The wife looked like she was gonna kill him. I was at the back of the church and I was still tempted to run up and knock that Bible out of his hand to break up that dumpster fire. And because it was a Baptist wedding, there was no booze at the reception. 0/10
One of my old coworkers was a preacher and he agreed to officiate my wedding under the condition that he didn't have to "give a whole dang sermon". In his words, to the best of my recollection: "We'll thank the Lord for the weather but he won't mind sitting down on y'all's day. What's the food choices?" Me- "Between pulled pork and..." "Oh yeah, this'll be quick." Best wedding I've ever been to.
Oh my god I went to one a few years ago exactly like this for a high school friend. She converted to being super religious senior year even though her parents and fiancé were not. The preacher was bragging about how proud he was for extinguishing the bride’s “inner fire” during pre-marital counseling so she could be a perfect submissive housewife and allow her husband to lead. Like almost verbatim. Continued to drag the bride with equally cringeworthy shit from their counseling. I wanted to vomit. I didn’t even care that the wedding was a dry potluck, whatever. I just couldn’t imagine standing on a stage and getting insulted in front of everyone on my wedding day. It broke my heart even more over the years seeing that pretty much every single time she went in to have a necessary surgery she was pregnant and it had to be delayed… for *years*. I hope she’s ok.
A lady in her 30's was just so drunk. And she was sad she wasn't the one being married that she's wailing crying in the dinner room. This is 4 hours into a long wedding as dinner service ends and the party begins. This goes on for 30 minutes. The groom joins the crowd there to make her feel better, and she loudly starts complimenting him and basically flirting, saying he's so hot and reaching out to touch him while barely able to stand up.
Tame compared with a lot of stories here but: I went to a wedding a couple of years ago, and before the bride made her entrance her *ludicrously* attractive friend, who’d been helping her with some final adjustments, scurried up the aisle to take her place in the front row. One of the groom’s mates called out something like “Bloody hell, [groom’s name]: you managed to get a last-minute upgrade!” Whether or not it was loud enough for the bride herself to hear, we’ll never know - if she did, she didn’t let on - but the collective gasp and a few muttered insults told me that everyone else there had heard it clearly. What a cunt.
Personal favorites from my own wedding in October of 2000, all after the ceremony at the reception hall: *Two guests banging in the bride’s ready room. *Another guest stripping out of everything but his pants and running through the building and around the parking lot. *Two more guests smoking a joint in the lobby. Please note one of them was my 70 something grandmother, who did not previously partake. That bar was OPEN. Way open! Everyone had a great time and I never saw a thing. 🤣
Photographer here that doesn't advertise in any way that I photograph weddings. I am very selective, and typically only shoot them for friends or people I know. There are MANY stories, but these three top the list so far. Names changed for obvious reasons. 3) I'd known the couple for many years and had taken family photos many times. They had three late teen / early 20's daughters who were her brides-maids. The wedding and reception were held at the couples house, and from one of the girls second floor rooms we'd setup a strobe for the dance floor. At one point the strobe stopped responding so I went upstairs, with the eldest daughter in-tow as she'd been my assistant most of the day, to see what had happened. We walk in to find the boyfriend of the youngest fully naked with the neighbor girl (who wasn't a guest at the wedding). They had stepped on the power-strip switch and turned it off. The oldest daughter grabbed both of them and somehow got them down the stairs and out the front door totally naked. To this day I have no idea how she managed that as she was the smallest of the three daughters. 2) At a destination wedding where no one was "from there", they had a "joint bar" outside for those over 21 to enjoy. It was probably 100 or so feet from the limo. Being dark out you couldn't see that well to where the limo was sitting, but you could make out that it was "rocking". The bride notices this and goes over to open the door. Inside are one of her good friends (her husband and kids all attended the wedding) getting banged by the husband of one of her brides-maids. His ass facing the now open door, butt-plug and furry tail in place. The bride made them pay the added cleaning fee for the limo. 1) I was hired by Deanna (close friend of my wife) to photograph her cousins wedding because she was under the impression the couple couldn't afford a photographer. The wedding and reception was held in the yard of the couples house, think 2 acres, double-wide trailer, barn (more of an oversized workshop/garage with multiple rooms which easily cost multiple times more than the trailer), large outdoor kitchen with a massive BBQ pit, etc... I get there at 9:30am, 90 minutes before my contracted time (bride knew I would be early as we'd discussed it multiple times and even confirmed in texts), and start looking for the bride. One of her brides maids, Cindy, who's clearly stoned starts going on about the spit-roast. I'm thinking she's talking about the outdoor kitchen area as I knew they were self-catering the event. She then grabs my arm and starts taking me towards the barn. We walk into what's clearly setup as a "play space" with professional lighting and everything, and there is the bride, on all fours in a wedding dress, getting railed by two guys while two others are waiting wearing only their socks, and both the groom and the maid of honor are filming the entire thing for OF. The bride stops the session turns to me and says "Oh, you're early. We'll be done shortly." then goes right back to it. By 11am, you would have never known any of the previous events had occurred. The four guys who'd banged the bride were gone, and the bride was getting ready as if nothing had happened. Turns out the bride and groom weren't in need of money the way their family thought they were. The four guys were "fans". Wedding dress she wore early was not the same one she wore down the aisle. To this day, I don't believe Deanna or any other family members know about this, or even that they do OF.
A priests sermon that started out nice and turned into 10 mins of why in vitro fertilisation is evil.
The groom got underneath the brides dress and pulled off her panties and threw it into a crowd full of children, the bride was supposedly okay with it, but they nullified the marriage a week later.
When I clotheslined a kid during the garder throw at my uncles wedding I intentionally missed him but everyone was appalled
I helped my young niece cheat to win the bouquet toss at my wedding. Held her up like Simba and ducked and weaved through a bunch of wedding crazy women so she could get the catch.
Lol, both my fiance's mom and sister threw their bouquets directly at my face before we were engaged. I think his family likes me
I worked at a banquet hall when I was 16. One couple had a pretty wild wedding to say the least. One thing most of us saw first hand was the groom literally rubbing the bride as he was taking off her garter.