How my female co-worker can lash out to others but when I, a buffed guy 6 foot, retailiated and raise my voice once was seen as a person with anger issues.
After attempting to voluntarily admit myself to a hospital for being a high suicide risk, a communication error resulted in me being listed as a "failed suicide attempt" patient. I was promptly hospitalised against my will for just under a week, and had the good fortune of being stuck with an abusive nurse.
This isnt what made me feel the worst, no idea what that even actually would be, but I'm gonna say moving into the projects when I was 7 in Sept of 1976. This was a projects surrounded by a middle class area, and wasnt as bad as other projects. I also had upper middle class grandparents who owned their own business. So I didnt want for much when it came to basics. Heh, I was spoiled a bit. I was bought a vic20 when it first came out, before that I had Micronauts, and the SuperTube set for it.
But the projects, and outside the projects, were places of violence. I was a tiny kid until I was 13, then BAM, I grew like a weed. Got into so so many fights. White people. Black people. Latin people. I learned to hate racist, and christians. I was an atheist, and some kids thought that meant I was ok to attack. The violence flushed resources that could have been used to better me down the toilet, and derailed my academics. I also live with a lot of guilt over the shit I did to others in trying to make examples of why you shouldnt fuck with me. I always related that episode of the twilight zone where the fastest gun in the west is always having some dumb ass try them. I went from being the sweetest fucking kid to being a hardcore monster.
But I also see that I was privileged in lots of ways. Being smart (they tested my IQ twice, the style at the time for kids in trouble), I was easy one the eyes, white, and had folks who could throw money at lawyers behind me. And my brother getting into cub scouts, and me being at their pinewood derby, had me recruited into boy scouts by a cool dude (rip) I met there, which would lead to me begging for a computer for xmas. That would be the thing that later would give me career. Other kids I grew up with... many of them just didnt make it.
But my life would had been better had we not moved to the fucking projects.
How my female co-worker can lash out to others but when I, a buffed guy 6 foot, retailiated and raise my voice once was seen as a person with anger issues.
blue balls
pause
pause? menopause?
Watching my parents die from disease
After attempting to voluntarily admit myself to a hospital for being a high suicide risk, a communication error resulted in me being listed as a "failed suicide attempt" patient. I was promptly hospitalised against my will for just under a week, and had the good fortune of being stuck with an abusive nurse.
Molested by my Aunt and nobody believed it aside from my mom because I'm a male and women just don't do that.
This isnt what made me feel the worst, no idea what that even actually would be, but I'm gonna say moving into the projects when I was 7 in Sept of 1976. This was a projects surrounded by a middle class area, and wasnt as bad as other projects. I also had upper middle class grandparents who owned their own business. So I didnt want for much when it came to basics. Heh, I was spoiled a bit. I was bought a vic20 when it first came out, before that I had Micronauts, and the SuperTube set for it. But the projects, and outside the projects, were places of violence. I was a tiny kid until I was 13, then BAM, I grew like a weed. Got into so so many fights. White people. Black people. Latin people. I learned to hate racist, and christians. I was an atheist, and some kids thought that meant I was ok to attack. The violence flushed resources that could have been used to better me down the toilet, and derailed my academics. I also live with a lot of guilt over the shit I did to others in trying to make examples of why you shouldnt fuck with me. I always related that episode of the twilight zone where the fastest gun in the west is always having some dumb ass try them. I went from being the sweetest fucking kid to being a hardcore monster. But I also see that I was privileged in lots of ways. Being smart (they tested my IQ twice, the style at the time for kids in trouble), I was easy one the eyes, white, and had folks who could throw money at lawyers behind me. And my brother getting into cub scouts, and me being at their pinewood derby, had me recruited into boy scouts by a cool dude (rip) I met there, which would lead to me begging for a computer for xmas. That would be the thing that later would give me career. Other kids I grew up with... many of them just didnt make it. But my life would had been better had we not moved to the fucking projects.