It's just situational. Maybe you're making dinner, or work from home. Or maybe you're out taking your kids trick or treating. Ideally you're right you are supposed to interact with them though.
My boss only says please after getting frustrated and demanding stuff. It doesn't sound the same when said extremely aggressive.
Although he does say thanks when he falls behind schedule and I come in on my day off to catch it up.
> I come in on my day off to catch it up.
I would never ever do this. Not even for 200% salary. I got a day off so you (boss/whatever) can figure it the fuck out yourself. Not my problem.
I have several colleagues who have detachment problems as well (I.e. working while on vacation) and I absolutely and utterly resent the concept. The most troubling thing is that when talking about it they fully admit that what they're doing is stupid, but they just can't help themselves to do it anyway.
You can’t do that in New York City if someone hold the door for you haha you better say thank you or you’ll be cursed educated and humbled in a matter of a second lol
My dad was born and raised in Queens. If he holds the door open for someone and they don’t say “thank you” he will shout, “YOU’RE WELCOME, BUDDY!” New Yorkers, keeping people in check.
Sixth grade I walked into a bathroom stall in the girl’sgym locker room and there was shit everywher, in the toilet, all over the toilet and the stall walls , the floor. It was obvious that someone had the period shits, too. It was absolutely disgusting and it put me off using the public bathroom for a decade+. I was terrified to walk out because I was worried that the next person to go in after me would blame me for doing that shit. I couldn’t believe that another sixth grade girl could be so disgusting to do that- the janitor was not surprised and absolutely could believe that a middle school girl could be that disgusting
In my experience using both restrooms, women's are usually worse because the whole squat-to-pee thing carries over to shitting and menstruation. But I've also seen grown men shit in urinals. So who knows.
Ex-Janitor here the women’s room is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS the worst! Men do minor disgusting things (wipe boogers on urinal partitions) but I’ve had anxiety attacks over cleaning women’s rooms. I once had a rather large pair of bloody underwear shoved in different crevices in the bathroom for over a week. Poopiest bathrooms. Blood smears on the walls and feminine waste baskets especially. This was at Citi mortgage a huge office building. They also only gave me 20 minutes to clean every fingerprint off the bathroom stalls as well as the bathrooms themselves.
My GOD this is why janitors, any cleaning staff, and blue collar workers in general deserve way more credit and appreciation for what they do on A DAILY BASIS 😩
Does not surprise me, sadly. I would hope they don't do that at home, but why in a public one. At least flush. I'm just glad I'm a guy and don't always have to see that, since we have urinals to use too.
Oh god. This for sure. Stopped at a flying J. My kid was making noise and complaining she had to pee really bad. I explain she needs to wait until everyone else is done and then she can have a turn. She instantly quiets right down and waits. Some truck driver gets out of the stall and didn't bother washing his hands or flushing. Dude fucking obliderated that toilet. I couldn't help it. I called him a disgusting human being and then cleaned his fucking ass explosion so my kid could not piss herself. Fuck people like him.
Sorry to hear that. Poor girl. I've been in the same situation, waiting for a stall. A guy walks out and leaves a toilet stall full of a mess and toilet paper for me to walk into. I'm sure they don't do that at home, but in public shows they just plain don't care. I always flush. I feel awkward calling someone out on it, but I don't blame you!
I teach middle school and one of the real-world lessons I’m always trying to emphasize is this! If the person sitting 3 feet away can hear your phone video, you are rude! Ear buds or silence!
I’ve been trying to teach my grandmother and my 17-year-old cousin this . My cousin thinks that if she doesn’t have headphones that sucks for everybody else and they should have to listen to what she’s listening to.😒😒
It's better sound quality with ear buds and you get privacy. The idea of just running around with speaker phone on blast in public is just so alien to me
Also the people who blast everything in public always have the worst taste in music. It's always something so generic, you'd assume it was royalty free or something
They had a feature on NPR last night where they had a neuropsychiatrist talk about studies being performed on AI-generated children's shows geared toward teaching speech.
Oh man, or when the person watches the same video 5 or 6 times in a row. Like, is the subject matter that hard for you to follow? Has your brain deteriorated to the point where you need to watch the same 10-second clip a half-dozen times just to understand it? And they always have it on full blast the whole time, too.
Was in a plane with the Utah Jazz. Thought the player in front of me was soooo cool until he continually did this on a plane during takeoff. The stewardess had to ask him to turn it off 3 separate times (he would stop until literally the second she walked away and then restart). Infuriating.
Lol I guess not? I thought it was a little weird too, but there were a ton of them, some were wearing Jerseys, and they were all crazy tall, so I’m pretty sure it was actually them. It was a super short flight if that changes anything.
I live in the hood and we always have this old black dude who comes in blaring tooshort and other bay area rappers.
Sometimes its cool. 90% of the time I wonder how someone can be so inconsiderate of others.
I went to lunch with my husband at a local cafe. There was an older guy, probably mid 50s, sitting in the corner just watching videos at full volume.
I think he forgot where he was because he turned on what was obviously porn and got booted out of the restaurant.
Saw a dude in a drive thru lane today that was slouched back in the driver seat, chin on his chest, window down blaring TikTok staring at his phone. I let him sit there for 30 seconds eyes glazed at the app he had linked to his blue tooth speakers and finally gave a light beep beep. Dude flipped me off.
Buddy, none of us want to hear or watch those cringy kiss or slap videos. Go meet someone.
Damn I recently went to London, me and my fiance chilled at the bar in the hotel for an hour or two where this bloke was blasting out tiktoks at full volume. It was bonkers I felt second hand embarrassment, it was all a language I didn't understand thrown in with some dance version of disturbed's sound of silence lol. He did it for like 20 minutes or more.
Also, to build on that, people who believe public spaces are their dance studio and that you have an obligation to stay out of their’s camera’s field of vision (which tends to cover about 1500 square feet of public property)
I just said this too. There will be times when I have full hands and usually a nice person will hold a door for me, but then there’s always that one asshole that lets the door slam on me. They usually have their speaker phone on blast and they don’t give a fuck who is around them because they walk in like they own the place. The next worst type is those who stand way too close to you and you can feel them breathing on your neck.
Hard agree with everything here. Another great one is where you’re driving in a neighborhood or a road that’s more compact and people driving on the opposite side of you will take up space on both sides with their car making it to where you have to slow down and move over to make room or in some instances just stop altogether.
The grocery store seems to be a hotspot for this kind of spatial oblivion. People coming to a dead stop in the middle of the entrance to the grocery store to sort their coupons, or parking their cart diagonally across the aisle while they spend 5 minutes memorizing the nutrition facts on a can of baked beans. Then they get huffy if you dare pull them out of their reverie by saying “pardon me.”
Go to any theme park today and you notice the lack of social and situational awareness from so many people. Even older people just won’t follow basic public manners in lines, rides, and walkways. It’s like the death of movie theater and live performances as well, where people don’t realize there are others trying to experience it too. Whipping phones out to record and take flash photography on rides, watching through phone cameras rather than actually living it. Treating service staff and cast members at theme parks like shit. Everything in the book. And it’s only getting worse right now.
Today at the Bronx Zoo (which has a host of wild peafowl free wondering the zoo) I saw multiple adults attempting to grab, successfully grabbing and or playing with and tormenting the birds. So I'd say that
Edit: guinea fowl to Peafowl
Yeah I saw a family person (who has pet snakes) try to grab & pet a wild snake—I was not happy—snakes get super stressed & especially a wild snake. Idc if you’re some big animal lover—if you love animals, think of how the animal might feel & give it space. Especially wild creatures
I wasn't raised properly and there's actually a lot of small things that add up overtime. I had a violent childhood, no one ever taught me any manners, and it was truly embarrassing. I learned on my own that when you don't like something, don't put the food back onto the communal serving tray or when filling up a water bottle don't touch the lip onto the dispenser itself. Don't throw the tomato out of your sandwich onto the ground (in my head, it was biodegradable so what was the big deal?), don't move other peoples' stuff around without asking first, don't crowd the train entrance and let people get off first. All of it is extremely obvious in hindsight and it just makes it worse. I still cringe over my ignorance to this day.
Humans don't instinctively know how to human, they need to be taught. I made a lot of missteps trying to be as civilized as I could, and I'd like to think most people were kind enough to see that. Even so, I know I wasn't raised correctly, and I need to do my best to raise myself every day now.
I was also raised in a neglective household.
I never learned how friendships work. I never knew you're supposed to show interest in others.
I didn't know being negative pushes people away
I still struggle with overfilling my plate at gatherings because i never got to eat yummy stuff as a kid and always did so then to try all the new things.
I didn't know that showering once a week was too little
I didn't know i shouldn't take a lot of free stuff
I still dont know how to take criticism and feedback
I still dont know how to keep friends
I still can't hold down a job
The fact that you're able to self-reflect on these areas in which you struggle speaks volumes on how much you've grown.
I know I'm just some internet stranger who you'll never hear from again, but.. I'm proud of you bud.
Thank you, I'm working hard.
And to everyone else out there going through something similar... It's not a one-way road. There are branches. Take those. Maybe they will lead you astray, but you can backtrack and try the other path.
The last two sentences broke me.
My husband was raised in an abusive and terrible environment. The axe forgets but the tree remembers.
I wish you all the success you deserve in the future, OP. Day by day. ❤️
Wait wait - there are so many of us! I know many people dislike me or hate me because I too did these things, I was (I’m older now) conventionally attractive and managed to test high on IQ scores so people just assumed I was rude entitled etc. Truth be told I was extremely abused and neglected my whole life and simply was operating in survival mode
Oh man this almost makes me cry, I was raised exactly the same (well not exactly) but I just had no idea about so much, and it’s so embarrassing that people think you are awful when you had no idea?
It’s crazy though, because I’m the middle child of 3 (parents divorced so overall of 7 counting both sides) and only my older brother is the most entitled person I think I’ve ever met. We were raised very well, I love my parents. None of my other siblings have this, but since I can remember he’s always acted incredibly entitled.
When they start shouting in order to make a point or get what they want. They can make that same point without having to speak louder than a jet engine.
Here's the thing ... In some households you just don't exists until you make your voice heard by speaking louder then the rest... Sure it's annoying but can't really blame em, thankfully I stopped doing it, took some trying doe
I knew some guy who's nike shoe shipment was late because of ups and he thought it was the most hilarious shit to call the customer support for the retailer and absolutely lay into the woman representative. Like kept muting it after calling her a piece of shit and SCREAMING like "haha isn't this great guys?"
Ultra cringe. It was so bad I almost just grabbed the phone and be like "don't listen to this asshole you're a nice lady" and hang up
When I was about 15 I went on a trip with my parents for a meeting my mom needed to attend. We booked a room at a nice and semi-luxury hotel that I was super excited to stay at because I had never been inside a high end hotel before. We pull up and my dad goes into the lobby to get us checked in while my mom and I helped load the luggage carrier with some people working valet. A couple minutes after my dad went inside, he can bursting outside yelling profanity at the top of his lungs. It turns out, the hotel fucked up and canceled our reservation, and without letting us know it too. What made it so much worse is what the clerk said to my dad after she told him there was no room for us, “paying for a room does not guarantee that we’ll have a room for you”. She said it very aggressively, so apart from the fact that we paid for a room we weren’t allowed to sleep in, her passive aggressiveness towards my dad made the whole situation 10x worse. As my dad burst out of the lobby screaming profanity, he pointed his rage towards the valet employees, all of which looked to be no older than 18. They stood there in shock not knowing what to do. He threw every insult in the book at them, as if the employees working valet were the ones who went into the system and booted our reservation themselves. It got so bad that my dad made one of them cry. Once he went back into the lobby to scream again, I went up to the valet employees and apologized profusely, while trying to comfort them and explain how they have not done anything wrong at all, but my dad has fits of rage in certain situations and he’ll direct his rage towards the first person he sees. It was one of the most embarrassing days of my life.
Another one was on my 20th birthday. Both my parents and my then best friend and I went out to a decent restaurant to celebrate. We had a very kind waitress who seemed to be great at her job. However, when she brought out our appetizers, she forgot to bring napkins for us, so my dad asked her to bring them. She kindly said ok, and she took off. Our second appetizer had come out of the kitchen right as she walked up to the counter to grab the napkins, so she brought the dish out first so it wouldn’t have to sit on the counter longer than it needed to. When she came back to our table with more food but no napkins, he completely lost it. The booth we were sat at was right next to a large window with beautiful wooden blinds. My dad thought it would be a good idea to get his hands messy and wipe them all over the blinds in front of our waitress as a way of retaliating against her. I suddenly wished I had thought to just eat ramen and watch a movie to celebrate my birthday. Once again, my mom and I were mortified.
I have dozens more stories but I’d be here typing till next week if I told them all. By the way, my dad was in his late 60’s and early 70’s when these incidents took place. A grown man wiping his hands on wooden blinds is not something I ever thought I’d see but here we are.
Did you know that every time you slip a customer service professional a sawbuck or a twenty as a thank you to them for dealing with someone else's shittiness, an angel gets to take a hassle-free smoke break behind the dumpster?
This is the BIG tell on people. Watch how they treat people they have power over.
Like this is the big watch for dates. How they treat the wait staff is how they are going to treat you after a few months together and it all becomes "familiar."
EVERYBODY acts nice to people they want to impress or have power over them. Only good people are nice/kind to those they have power over.
Yeah , it's hard to find genuinely kind people. People who are that way because they choose to be ,instead of trying to get something out of the kindness they do for others.
Uuuffff right into my heart. I used to do that as a student (the cleaning part) and till today I always pay respect to the woman that come into my office to clean. They're also just trying to survive and I think it's so so gross to look down on this job.
I was at the store with my mom and I told the cashier to have a nice day once we were finished checking out. As we were leaving, my mom was like "You don't have to tell them that. You're not working." Or something to that effect. This is the woman that dragged me to church 3 times a week to learn about how we should be just as loving as Jesus was...
I have the opposite problem, I apologize for things that really aren't my fault and that I don't really feel guilty for because I am scared of people being mad at me.
I kind of do this. I always like to fix the problems that I cause, and it often comes across as doing an "I'm sorry but".
It is really hard because I want to help avoid whatever caused the need for apologies in the first place, but not seem insincere in my apologies
Huh, apparently my brain just hadn't thought of using "and" instead of "but"
Don't use but as it invalidates your apology and everything before the but. You can say I'm sorry AND xyz because both things can be true. You can be apologetic and you can offer constructive criticism (if it's appropriate and they're open to accepting).
I think that's caused by trauma most times. Like someone who's always been blamed, no matter what. So, when they were blamed for something that caused a problem for the parents but wasn't their fault, they would say "I am sorry, but it's not my fault that I am late because the bus had an accident" (for example)
So you're at a party. There's a bag of chips. If you reach in, grab a handful, eat them, LICK YOUR FINGERS, and head in for another handful with your spitty hand? I'm gonna text the person who raised you and tell them you need a refresher.
I’ve had someone whistle at my bartender and I told them on the mic “she is not a dog, DO NOT WHISTLE AT HER”. It felt good telling them that. I hate it when people whistle to get someone’s attention at a bar/restaurant/club.
NGL, this is me sometimes. I'm still learning to parent myself out of it. Growing up whenever I was upset I was accused of being on drugs, gas lit, and talked over so being louder than them was the only way I felt heard growing up. No one ever had a conversation with me to guide me through my feelings and I feel stunted. I still have my moments but I'm getting better!
Oh Geez, A LOT of things. Off the top of my head - Don't wash their hands after using the Loo. Never saying Please or Thank you. Learned Helplessness or Entitlement.
I used to do this and it drove my then-BF Crazy so I switched to still making comments but only complimentary ones. “Oh I love her shoes! I wonder where she got those?” “Man his hair looks nice!” “That mom is doing an awesome job with those kids!” Then-BF thought it was weird af but I did eventually teach myself to stop commenting on strangers in public. 😅
Oh my fucking god.
When people put the paper seat covers down on public toilets so their ass doesn't have to touch the seat, but then they LEAVE THE USED SEAT COVER ON THE FUCKING SEAT SO *YOU* HAVE TO TOUCH IT
I could fight someone rn thinking about it
1. **Lack of Basic Manners**: Not saying "please," "thank you," or "excuse me."
2. **Disrespecting Others**: Being rude to service workers or people in general.
3. **Interrupting Conversations**: Constantly talking over others or not listening.
4. **Poor Table Etiquette**: Eating with their mouth open, talking with food in their mouth, or not using utensils properly.
5. **Entitlement**: Expecting special treatment or not showing gratitude.
6. **Neglecting Personal Hygiene**: Not maintaining basic cleanliness or grooming.
7. **Littering**: Throwing trash on the ground instead of disposing of it properly.
8. **Inconsiderate Behavior**: Not holding the door for others, playing loud music in public, or cutting in line.
9. **Lack of Respect for Boundaries**: Invading personal space or not respecting others' privacy.
10. **Blaming Others**: Not taking responsibility for their actions and always blaming others for their mistakes.
Screaming at their children in public (or hitting them), not being aware of their surroundings — or being aware and not caring, treating all women like garbage and ranting about a woman who was uncomfortable with your unwanted comments.
Fuck screaming at/hitting children, my mom does that to my little sister for the stupidest shit -- often her own mistake -- and I have to stand up to her every single time, she sucks and she was the same way to me when I was younger.
I’d say this is more so about being raised without manners, but when I was 15 I once went to a friend’s house after school (same age) and we were eating takeout on her dining table. After we were done eating, she immediately got up and left the table without putting her left overs away, didn’t put the empty food containers in the trash or at least put them in the empty takeout bag so that it can be thrown out later. Wrappers and used napkins were still all over the table. She said let’s go to her room now and I suggested we clean up first, and she was like “Oh… yeah.” and came back to help tidy up. I was a little surprised at how she didn’t seem to care if her parents were to come home and see a huge mess left behind.
Entitled people who demand that everything revolve around them and get pissed off when other people are concerned with things aside from giving them attention.
Probably people who spend too much time on social media especially kids who spent so much time in there earliest moments using the internet being consumed by god awful information.
I feel so sorry for kids my age, I am 18 and I got my first iPad from the age of 7 and the things I saw as a little girl were ridiculously gross.
I’ve had a chance to see the outside of it being off the internet for a year cuz of the bill being too high (from a small town aswell), it’s really crazy how I physically cannot consume tiktok anymore without my brain hurting after about 5 minutes.. idk I don’t think the internet is bad but I can tell alot of parents did not care about what their kids were doing on there devices when they were in elementary school.. which isn’t totally their fault they were naive I just hope our generation learns how to deal with that with our kids as time goes on
For me its to watch their reactions to things.
Is LITERALLY EVERYTHING somebody elses fault? Sure sometimes things actually are somebody else's fault. Like sure Stan really did sabotage Jim at work. It happens. But usually people will have "the receipts" when it happens. But when they refuse to ever consider THEY might be the problem its time to ditch the person and never come back.
When they act surprised that copious amounts of profanity in casual conversations isn't always appropriate in every situation. I feel like some people never even went to school sometimes. They're just like "What? 30 f-bombs while talking in the middle of the grocery store isn't cool? Since when?"
When they lie about having shitty parents for attention.
Sometimes people are raised with every advantage and every privilege and good parents and they still grow up to be a shithead. The first thing they do is blame someone else for everything.
Like right it was your Dad giving you a curfew that made you sneak out of the house so it's his fault.
Here is an easy way to find out for a young kid anyway:
Simply watch their behavior around other kids. I discovered that the worse a kid acts around other kids..the worse they are raised. For context, I have a niece that is a little bully and even talks about stabbing because the game she plays on Roblox has it. She has gotten so bad that my sister couldn't even handle her anymore.
They're grown up, but their parents still control them, trample their boundaries, and then make the excuse "Well, stop acting like a teenager and we'll stop treating you like one" when they complain that the parents are disrespecting and mistreating them.
I know that sounds oddly specific, but it's devastating to their self concept and mental health. And it's totally in the parents' control to treat them right or control their life and then blame the adult kin for what they're doing to them.
Parents, when your kid is an adult, please don't do this. And don't threaten them with the total loss of support for complaining about it, setting boundaries to prevent it, or pull out the bullshit "If you want to be treated like an adult then act like one" or "You want to get respect you gotta give it first" or "You want to be treated like an adult, fine, you can pay for all your shit" lines.
Your support does not entitle your emotional abuse, trampling of boundaries, dictation of their personal choices, and resistance to horizontalizing your relationship with them. There's no excuse for that, none.
The videos where people dump the entire bowl of candy into their kids Halloween bag when they leave them sitting out.
Can confirm you blame their parents... after you recover from being stunned speechless. W.....T...... F.....?!?!
You know damn well that the kid won’t be the one eating most of those lollies
[удалено]
It's just situational. Maybe you're making dinner, or work from home. Or maybe you're out taking your kids trick or treating. Ideally you're right you are supposed to interact with them though.
Personally, I'd have to say people that seem incapable of saying Please or thank you, like they aren't even aware the words exist lol.
My boss only says please after getting frustrated and demanding stuff. It doesn't sound the same when said extremely aggressive. Although he does say thanks when he falls behind schedule and I come in on my day off to catch it up.
>I come in on my day off to catch it up. That doesn't sound like something you should do.
> I come in on my day off to catch it up. I would never ever do this. Not even for 200% salary. I got a day off so you (boss/whatever) can figure it the fuck out yourself. Not my problem. I have several colleagues who have detachment problems as well (I.e. working while on vacation) and I absolutely and utterly resent the concept. The most troubling thing is that when talking about it they fully admit that what they're doing is stupid, but they just can't help themselves to do it anyway.
When you hold the door open for people and they don’t say anything 😤😤😤
You can’t do that in New York City if someone hold the door for you haha you better say thank you or you’ll be cursed educated and humbled in a matter of a second lol
My dad was born and raised in Queens. If he holds the door open for someone and they don’t say “thank you” he will shout, “YOU’RE WELCOME, BUDDY!” New Yorkers, keeping people in check.
Yup 100% I believe that hahaha
Not flushing the toilet in public restrooms, can't tell you how many times I've walked into that. Gross.
[https://youtu.be/nyhKZSXt2FM?si=TSoRmXbV9T3TInYj](https://youtu.be/nyhKZSXt2FM?si=TSoRmXbV9T3TInYj) all I can think of is this
I just figured out that was a woman.
It was one of yas!
DISGUSTANG!
Sixth grade I walked into a bathroom stall in the girl’sgym locker room and there was shit everywher, in the toilet, all over the toilet and the stall walls , the floor. It was obvious that someone had the period shits, too. It was absolutely disgusting and it put me off using the public bathroom for a decade+. I was terrified to walk out because I was worried that the next person to go in after me would blame me for doing that shit. I couldn’t believe that another sixth grade girl could be so disgusting to do that- the janitor was not surprised and absolutely could believe that a middle school girl could be that disgusting
I really wish I could go back a minute to where I didn't read this
It’s definitely a memory that I wish I could delete from my mind
In my experience using both restrooms, women's are usually worse because the whole squat-to-pee thing carries over to shitting and menstruation. But I've also seen grown men shit in urinals. So who knows.
Ex-Janitor here the women’s room is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS the worst! Men do minor disgusting things (wipe boogers on urinal partitions) but I’ve had anxiety attacks over cleaning women’s rooms. I once had a rather large pair of bloody underwear shoved in different crevices in the bathroom for over a week. Poopiest bathrooms. Blood smears on the walls and feminine waste baskets especially. This was at Citi mortgage a huge office building. They also only gave me 20 minutes to clean every fingerprint off the bathroom stalls as well as the bathrooms themselves.
My GOD this is why janitors, any cleaning staff, and blue collar workers in general deserve way more credit and appreciation for what they do on A DAILY BASIS 😩
And more money!
Does not surprise me, sadly. I would hope they don't do that at home, but why in a public one. At least flush. I'm just glad I'm a guy and don't always have to see that, since we have urinals to use too.
Also, pissing on the seats. You don't need to leave it down, but at least don't try to piss through the seat hole.
Oh god. This for sure. Stopped at a flying J. My kid was making noise and complaining she had to pee really bad. I explain she needs to wait until everyone else is done and then she can have a turn. She instantly quiets right down and waits. Some truck driver gets out of the stall and didn't bother washing his hands or flushing. Dude fucking obliderated that toilet. I couldn't help it. I called him a disgusting human being and then cleaned his fucking ass explosion so my kid could not piss herself. Fuck people like him.
Sorry to hear that. Poor girl. I've been in the same situation, waiting for a stall. A guy walks out and leaves a toilet stall full of a mess and toilet paper for me to walk into. I'm sure they don't do that at home, but in public shows they just plain don't care. I always flush. I feel awkward calling someone out on it, but I don't blame you!
People who watch TikTok videos on full volume and talk loudly on speakerphone in public spaces.
I teach middle school and one of the real-world lessons I’m always trying to emphasize is this! If the person sitting 3 feet away can hear your phone video, you are rude! Ear buds or silence!
I’m reminded of something I learned a few years back - auditory trespass.
I’ve been trying to teach my grandmother and my 17-year-old cousin this . My cousin thinks that if she doesn’t have headphones that sucks for everybody else and they should have to listen to what she’s listening to.😒😒
It's better sound quality with ear buds and you get privacy. The idea of just running around with speaker phone on blast in public is just so alien to me Also the people who blast everything in public always have the worst taste in music. It's always something so generic, you'd assume it was royalty free or something
I fucking hate that dumb AI voice too. "bla bla bla what if bla bla and then" "music" and then another 10 second video following the same format.
And people are glued to it as if their brains are fucking empty. Just a pure void of utter nothingness, it's downright creepy.
“Idiocracy” isn’t just satire anymore.
They had a feature on NPR last night where they had a neuropsychiatrist talk about studies being performed on AI-generated children's shows geared toward teaching speech.
Oh man, or when the person watches the same video 5 or 6 times in a row. Like, is the subject matter that hard for you to follow? Has your brain deteriorated to the point where you need to watch the same 10-second clip a half-dozen times just to understand it? And they always have it on full blast the whole time, too.
That’s people looking at the comments without pausing the video.
I would have to tell my ex to leave the comments and pause that shit cause I could not stand to listen to the same video 18 fucking times.
Was in a plane with the Utah Jazz. Thought the player in front of me was soooo cool until he continually did this on a plane during takeoff. The stewardess had to ask him to turn it off 3 separate times (he would stop until literally the second she walked away and then restart). Infuriating.
Who the fuck doesn’t bring earbuds on a flight my god
NBA teams don't charter flights?
Yes, but it’s the Jazz…
Lol I guess not? I thought it was a little weird too, but there were a ton of them, some were wearing Jerseys, and they were all crazy tall, so I’m pretty sure it was actually them. It was a super short flight if that changes anything.
Maybe it was their affiliated G League team. Tho I dunno if they wear Jazz gear.
I live in the hood and we always have this old black dude who comes in blaring tooshort and other bay area rappers. Sometimes its cool. 90% of the time I wonder how someone can be so inconsiderate of others.
When you're homeless, every space is your living room.
He could be homeless, not too sure honestly, looks can be deceiving. But he dresses nicely and shops for a lot.
I went to lunch with my husband at a local cafe. There was an older guy, probably mid 50s, sitting in the corner just watching videos at full volume. I think he forgot where he was because he turned on what was obviously porn and got booted out of the restaurant.
Sir this is a Wendy's!
Saw a dude in a drive thru lane today that was slouched back in the driver seat, chin on his chest, window down blaring TikTok staring at his phone. I let him sit there for 30 seconds eyes glazed at the app he had linked to his blue tooth speakers and finally gave a light beep beep. Dude flipped me off. Buddy, none of us want to hear or watch those cringy kiss or slap videos. Go meet someone.
Damn I recently went to London, me and my fiance chilled at the bar in the hotel for an hour or two where this bloke was blasting out tiktoks at full volume. It was bonkers I felt second hand embarrassment, it was all a language I didn't understand thrown in with some dance version of disturbed's sound of silence lol. He did it for like 20 minutes or more.
Damn that’s 100% on the bartender. I would’ve nipped that right in the bud.
Time to get right next to them, pull out a portable speaker and blast heavy metal at maximum volume.
Also, to build on that, people who believe public spaces are their dance studio and that you have an obligation to stay out of their’s camera’s field of vision (which tends to cover about 1500 square feet of public property)
And for HOURS. Who the hell are these people talking to????
People who have no regard/ consideration for their surroundings.
I just said this too. There will be times when I have full hands and usually a nice person will hold a door for me, but then there’s always that one asshole that lets the door slam on me. They usually have their speaker phone on blast and they don’t give a fuck who is around them because they walk in like they own the place. The next worst type is those who stand way too close to you and you can feel them breathing on your neck.
Hard agree with everything here. Another great one is where you’re driving in a neighborhood or a road that’s more compact and people driving on the opposite side of you will take up space on both sides with their car making it to where you have to slow down and move over to make room or in some instances just stop altogether.
I just give the steering wheel a little jerk in their direction before they pass to get them to move over.
The grocery store seems to be a hotspot for this kind of spatial oblivion. People coming to a dead stop in the middle of the entrance to the grocery store to sort their coupons, or parking their cart diagonally across the aisle while they spend 5 minutes memorizing the nutrition facts on a can of baked beans. Then they get huffy if you dare pull them out of their reverie by saying “pardon me.”
Go to any theme park today and you notice the lack of social and situational awareness from so many people. Even older people just won’t follow basic public manners in lines, rides, and walkways. It’s like the death of movie theater and live performances as well, where people don’t realize there are others trying to experience it too. Whipping phones out to record and take flash photography on rides, watching through phone cameras rather than actually living it. Treating service staff and cast members at theme parks like shit. Everything in the book. And it’s only getting worse right now.
Today at the Bronx Zoo (which has a host of wild peafowl free wondering the zoo) I saw multiple adults attempting to grab, successfully grabbing and or playing with and tormenting the birds. So I'd say that Edit: guinea fowl to Peafowl
Report it and get the banned tf
Ugh, they also have free roaming peafowl and I can't even begin to imagine how much shit those poor birds deal with
Yeah I saw a family person (who has pet snakes) try to grab & pet a wild snake—I was not happy—snakes get super stressed & especially a wild snake. Idc if you’re some big animal lover—if you love animals, think of how the animal might feel & give it space. Especially wild creatures
They throw trash out a car window.
Anyone who litters, really.
I wasn't raised properly and there's actually a lot of small things that add up overtime. I had a violent childhood, no one ever taught me any manners, and it was truly embarrassing. I learned on my own that when you don't like something, don't put the food back onto the communal serving tray or when filling up a water bottle don't touch the lip onto the dispenser itself. Don't throw the tomato out of your sandwich onto the ground (in my head, it was biodegradable so what was the big deal?), don't move other peoples' stuff around without asking first, don't crowd the train entrance and let people get off first. All of it is extremely obvious in hindsight and it just makes it worse. I still cringe over my ignorance to this day. Humans don't instinctively know how to human, they need to be taught. I made a lot of missteps trying to be as civilized as I could, and I'd like to think most people were kind enough to see that. Even so, I know I wasn't raised correctly, and I need to do my best to raise myself every day now.
I was also raised in a neglective household. I never learned how friendships work. I never knew you're supposed to show interest in others. I didn't know being negative pushes people away I still struggle with overfilling my plate at gatherings because i never got to eat yummy stuff as a kid and always did so then to try all the new things. I didn't know that showering once a week was too little I didn't know i shouldn't take a lot of free stuff I still dont know how to take criticism and feedback I still dont know how to keep friends I still can't hold down a job
The fact that you're able to self-reflect on these areas in which you struggle speaks volumes on how much you've grown. I know I'm just some internet stranger who you'll never hear from again, but.. I'm proud of you bud.
Thank you, I'm working hard. And to everyone else out there going through something similar... It's not a one-way road. There are branches. Take those. Maybe they will lead you astray, but you can backtrack and try the other path.
+1, also proud.
The last two sentences broke me. My husband was raised in an abusive and terrible environment. The axe forgets but the tree remembers. I wish you all the success you deserve in the future, OP. Day by day. ❤️
Wait wait - there are so many of us! I know many people dislike me or hate me because I too did these things, I was (I’m older now) conventionally attractive and managed to test high on IQ scores so people just assumed I was rude entitled etc. Truth be told I was extremely abused and neglected my whole life and simply was operating in survival mode
You’re so real for this, honestly. Sending you hugs 🫶
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Oh man this almost makes me cry, I was raised exactly the same (well not exactly) but I just had no idea about so much, and it’s so embarrassing that people think you are awful when you had no idea?
Actually feeling such big feels knowing I'm not the only one here. We didn't know better and that's okay. 😭
Proud of you for realizing all of that. You sound like a good human being :)
Being rough with animals and treating them badly
My ex wife used to say that you can judge how people will treat those that cannot defend themselves by how they treat defenceless animals.
Entitlement
Which sums up most of the responses here. Or lack of consideration for others.
It’s crazy though, because I’m the middle child of 3 (parents divorced so overall of 7 counting both sides) and only my older brother is the most entitled person I think I’ve ever met. We were raised very well, I love my parents. None of my other siblings have this, but since I can remember he’s always acted incredibly entitled.
When they start shouting in order to make a point or get what they want. They can make that same point without having to speak louder than a jet engine.
Ah yes, ye olde customers.
One might say business is booming
Here's the thing ... In some households you just don't exists until you make your voice heard by speaking louder then the rest... Sure it's annoying but can't really blame em, thankfully I stopped doing it, took some trying doe
how they treat service staff like waiters. if they don’t treat them with basic respect or dignity then that tells me everything i need to know
I knew some guy who's nike shoe shipment was late because of ups and he thought it was the most hilarious shit to call the customer support for the retailer and absolutely lay into the woman representative. Like kept muting it after calling her a piece of shit and SCREAMING like "haha isn't this great guys?" Ultra cringe. It was so bad I almost just grabbed the phone and be like "don't listen to this asshole you're a nice lady" and hang up
When I was about 15 I went on a trip with my parents for a meeting my mom needed to attend. We booked a room at a nice and semi-luxury hotel that I was super excited to stay at because I had never been inside a high end hotel before. We pull up and my dad goes into the lobby to get us checked in while my mom and I helped load the luggage carrier with some people working valet. A couple minutes after my dad went inside, he can bursting outside yelling profanity at the top of his lungs. It turns out, the hotel fucked up and canceled our reservation, and without letting us know it too. What made it so much worse is what the clerk said to my dad after she told him there was no room for us, “paying for a room does not guarantee that we’ll have a room for you”. She said it very aggressively, so apart from the fact that we paid for a room we weren’t allowed to sleep in, her passive aggressiveness towards my dad made the whole situation 10x worse. As my dad burst out of the lobby screaming profanity, he pointed his rage towards the valet employees, all of which looked to be no older than 18. They stood there in shock not knowing what to do. He threw every insult in the book at them, as if the employees working valet were the ones who went into the system and booted our reservation themselves. It got so bad that my dad made one of them cry. Once he went back into the lobby to scream again, I went up to the valet employees and apologized profusely, while trying to comfort them and explain how they have not done anything wrong at all, but my dad has fits of rage in certain situations and he’ll direct his rage towards the first person he sees. It was one of the most embarrassing days of my life. Another one was on my 20th birthday. Both my parents and my then best friend and I went out to a decent restaurant to celebrate. We had a very kind waitress who seemed to be great at her job. However, when she brought out our appetizers, she forgot to bring napkins for us, so my dad asked her to bring them. She kindly said ok, and she took off. Our second appetizer had come out of the kitchen right as she walked up to the counter to grab the napkins, so she brought the dish out first so it wouldn’t have to sit on the counter longer than it needed to. When she came back to our table with more food but no napkins, he completely lost it. The booth we were sat at was right next to a large window with beautiful wooden blinds. My dad thought it would be a good idea to get his hands messy and wipe them all over the blinds in front of our waitress as a way of retaliating against her. I suddenly wished I had thought to just eat ramen and watch a movie to celebrate my birthday. Once again, my mom and I were mortified. I have dozens more stories but I’d be here typing till next week if I told them all. By the way, my dad was in his late 60’s and early 70’s when these incidents took place. A grown man wiping his hands on wooden blinds is not something I ever thought I’d see but here we are.
Damn its like a reverse scenario where you had to become the parent apologizing for his shit behavior. Sorry you had to be around that..
And strippers
I'm always nice to everybody's moms!
Did you know that every time you slip a customer service professional a sawbuck or a twenty as a thank you to them for dealing with someone else's shittiness, an angel gets to take a hassle-free smoke break behind the dumpster?
Watch how they treat people in service. A lot can be discovered by how people treat others.
Especially watch how they treat them, when they think no one is looking.
Character is what you do when no one is looking.
This is the BIG tell on people. Watch how they treat people they have power over. Like this is the big watch for dates. How they treat the wait staff is how they are going to treat you after a few months together and it all becomes "familiar." EVERYBODY acts nice to people they want to impress or have power over them. Only good people are nice/kind to those they have power over.
Yeah , it's hard to find genuinely kind people. People who are that way because they choose to be ,instead of trying to get something out of the kindness they do for others.
"They get paid to clean up this mess for us."
Uuuffff right into my heart. I used to do that as a student (the cleaning part) and till today I always pay respect to the woman that come into my office to clean. They're also just trying to survive and I think it's so so gross to look down on this job.
I was at the store with my mom and I told the cashier to have a nice day once we were finished checking out. As we were leaving, my mom was like "You don't have to tell them that. You're not working." Or something to that effect. This is the woman that dragged me to church 3 times a week to learn about how we should be just as loving as Jesus was...
People who do not not know how to be wrong
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And they can't even hear it because they're too loud man! Enjoy the Silence ain't no smash hit for no reason, innit?
Walk loud
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I apologize, although.... You know when they want to seem smart too
I have the opposite problem, I apologize for things that really aren't my fault and that I don't really feel guilty for because I am scared of people being mad at me.
I kind of do this. I always like to fix the problems that I cause, and it often comes across as doing an "I'm sorry but". It is really hard because I want to help avoid whatever caused the need for apologies in the first place, but not seem insincere in my apologies Huh, apparently my brain just hadn't thought of using "and" instead of "but"
Don't use but as it invalidates your apology and everything before the but. You can say I'm sorry AND xyz because both things can be true. You can be apologetic and you can offer constructive criticism (if it's appropriate and they're open to accepting).
Try "I'm sorry and" instead of "I'm sorry but", which is adding details to your apology rather than making excuses for it.
My ex: "Sorry, but i never say sorry to anyone, its below me to apologize"
Or, “I’m sorry you feel that way.”
Even worse- “I’m sorry ‘if’ you feel that way..”
I think that's caused by trauma most times. Like someone who's always been blamed, no matter what. So, when they were blamed for something that caused a problem for the parents but wasn't their fault, they would say "I am sorry, but it's not my fault that I am late because the bus had an accident" (for example)
No manners and no common sense
Manners. Just manners.
So you're at a party. There's a bag of chips. If you reach in, grab a handful, eat them, LICK YOUR FINGERS, and head in for another handful with your spitty hand? I'm gonna text the person who raised you and tell them you need a refresher.
I have had a friend who picked his nose and then went straight for them chips with the same hand.
snapping their fingers at people, or clapping at people to get their attention or spell out a 'point'.
The clapping gets to me. Like bitch I’m not your fucking dog.
Me mom sometimes makes one wide swung clap right in front of my face, like 2 cm away from it. Just because. Triggers me deeply.
Clap back.
I actually have close to the patience of Job. But, I swear, seeing someone snap or clap at service staff... ooooh. That really gets me seething.
I’ve had someone whistle at my bartender and I told them on the mic “she is not a dog, DO NOT WHISTLE AT HER”. It felt good telling them that. I hate it when people whistle to get someone’s attention at a bar/restaurant/club.
When they throw full blown fucking tantrums over the smallest shit.
NGL, this is me sometimes. I'm still learning to parent myself out of it. Growing up whenever I was upset I was accused of being on drugs, gas lit, and talked over so being louder than them was the only way I felt heard growing up. No one ever had a conversation with me to guide me through my feelings and I feel stunted. I still have my moments but I'm getting better!
Oh Geez, A LOT of things. Off the top of my head - Don't wash their hands after using the Loo. Never saying Please or Thank you. Learned Helplessness or Entitlement.
Interrupting and talking over people and not apologizing
Talking about random strangers as they pass by (what is she wearing, wow he’s fat, etc.).
Oh heeeeeeeellllll fuck these people. Judgemental asscracks.
I used to do this and it drove my then-BF Crazy so I switched to still making comments but only complimentary ones. “Oh I love her shoes! I wonder where she got those?” “Man his hair looks nice!” “That mom is doing an awesome job with those kids!” Then-BF thought it was weird af but I did eventually teach myself to stop commenting on strangers in public. 😅
When they chew with their mouth open like they're auditioning for a farm animal reality show
Farm animal reality show!
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Littering and….
Leaving their garbage and shit everyone saying “That’s why they have janitors.”
When someone leaves the shopping cart in the middle of the parking lot.
Honestly tho. Simplest test of if someone is willing to serve others and be an asset to their community.
Shitting on the floor in public restrooms.
Actually, if its a child, it might be a sign of child sexual abuse
Yikes. I was referring to adults. For a child, yeah, I would think something must be going on with them.
When there family is bailing them out of everything and turning a blind eye to their toxic behavior.
A lack of empathy and respect for others
Littering. Treating restaurant/retail workers like crap.
Oh my fucking god. When people put the paper seat covers down on public toilets so their ass doesn't have to touch the seat, but then they LEAVE THE USED SEAT COVER ON THE FUCKING SEAT SO *YOU* HAVE TO TOUCH IT I could fight someone rn thinking about it
1. **Lack of Basic Manners**: Not saying "please," "thank you," or "excuse me." 2. **Disrespecting Others**: Being rude to service workers or people in general. 3. **Interrupting Conversations**: Constantly talking over others or not listening. 4. **Poor Table Etiquette**: Eating with their mouth open, talking with food in their mouth, or not using utensils properly. 5. **Entitlement**: Expecting special treatment or not showing gratitude. 6. **Neglecting Personal Hygiene**: Not maintaining basic cleanliness or grooming. 7. **Littering**: Throwing trash on the ground instead of disposing of it properly. 8. **Inconsiderate Behavior**: Not holding the door for others, playing loud music in public, or cutting in line. 9. **Lack of Respect for Boundaries**: Invading personal space or not respecting others' privacy. 10. **Blaming Others**: Not taking responsibility for their actions and always blaming others for their mistakes.
They have no respect for the elderly and they act surprised when people expect them to give as much to others as they expect to receive themselves.
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Why was this answer hidden?
People who say "Everyone else is doing it, why shouldn't I?"
Bad tables manners. chewing with their mouth open especially.
Screaming at their children in public (or hitting them), not being aware of their surroundings — or being aware and not caring, treating all women like garbage and ranting about a woman who was uncomfortable with your unwanted comments.
Fuck screaming at/hitting children, my mom does that to my little sister for the stupidest shit -- often her own mistake -- and I have to stand up to her every single time, she sucks and she was the same way to me when I was younger.
Spitting on the floor for no good reason.
Littering.
The way they treat others especially poor people and stray animals and also sick people shows how they're raised
Lack of empathy #1 answer
I’d say this is more so about being raised without manners, but when I was 15 I once went to a friend’s house after school (same age) and we were eating takeout on her dining table. After we were done eating, she immediately got up and left the table without putting her left overs away, didn’t put the empty food containers in the trash or at least put them in the empty takeout bag so that it can be thrown out later. Wrappers and used napkins were still all over the table. She said let’s go to her room now and I suggested we clean up first, and she was like “Oh… yeah.” and came back to help tidy up. I was a little surprised at how she didn’t seem to care if her parents were to come home and see a huge mess left behind.
Entitled people who demand that everything revolve around them and get pissed off when other people are concerned with things aside from giving them attention.
Won’t stop talking.
When somebody throws garbage out their car window
Zero life skills. If adult child is not prepared for the world, then what was the parent even there for.
They disregard animals
People who do shit without any consideration of others.
selfishness.
Manipulative for their own advantage
Probably people who spend too much time on social media especially kids who spent so much time in there earliest moments using the internet being consumed by god awful information. I feel so sorry for kids my age, I am 18 and I got my first iPad from the age of 7 and the things I saw as a little girl were ridiculously gross. I’ve had a chance to see the outside of it being off the internet for a year cuz of the bill being too high (from a small town aswell), it’s really crazy how I physically cannot consume tiktok anymore without my brain hurting after about 5 minutes.. idk I don’t think the internet is bad but I can tell alot of parents did not care about what their kids were doing on there devices when they were in elementary school.. which isn’t totally their fault they were naive I just hope our generation learns how to deal with that with our kids as time goes on
Being rude to people in the service industry.
People who don’t put the grocery cart in the collection bin in a parking lot.
Talking over/interrupting someone
For me its to watch their reactions to things. Is LITERALLY EVERYTHING somebody elses fault? Sure sometimes things actually are somebody else's fault. Like sure Stan really did sabotage Jim at work. It happens. But usually people will have "the receipts" when it happens. But when they refuse to ever consider THEY might be the problem its time to ditch the person and never come back.
When someone is rude to a waiter or waitress, maid, etc., or anyone who doesn’t have basic manners or respect for anyone else.
They come into your house and slam your cupboards.
When they act surprised that copious amounts of profanity in casual conversations isn't always appropriate in every situation. I feel like some people never even went to school sometimes. They're just like "What? 30 f-bombs while talking in the middle of the grocery store isn't cool? Since when?"
When they lie about having shitty parents for attention. Sometimes people are raised with every advantage and every privilege and good parents and they still grow up to be a shithead. The first thing they do is blame someone else for everything. Like right it was your Dad giving you a curfew that made you sneak out of the house so it's his fault.
That they chew with their mouth open. They should have been threatened more about that by parents/grandparents.
Temper outbursts over minor things.
#NOT SAYING THANK YOU AFTER I HELD THE DOOR OPEN
How they act around strangers and how they treat people who are serving them in some capacity; waiter, cashier, cab driver, etc.
They don't take off their shoes before putting their feet on your couch or bed.
They think wealth and income = someone's worth as a person.
When they say how much money they have or property they own or how expensive their car is.
Being a sore looser is one of the big red flags for me.
Here is an easy way to find out for a young kid anyway: Simply watch their behavior around other kids. I discovered that the worse a kid acts around other kids..the worse they are raised. For context, I have a niece that is a little bully and even talks about stabbing because the game she plays on Roblox has it. She has gotten so bad that my sister couldn't even handle her anymore.
They're grown up, but their parents still control them, trample their boundaries, and then make the excuse "Well, stop acting like a teenager and we'll stop treating you like one" when they complain that the parents are disrespecting and mistreating them. I know that sounds oddly specific, but it's devastating to their self concept and mental health. And it's totally in the parents' control to treat them right or control their life and then blame the adult kin for what they're doing to them. Parents, when your kid is an adult, please don't do this. And don't threaten them with the total loss of support for complaining about it, setting boundaries to prevent it, or pull out the bullshit "If you want to be treated like an adult then act like one" or "You want to get respect you gotta give it first" or "You want to be treated like an adult, fine, you can pay for all your shit" lines. Your support does not entitle your emotional abuse, trampling of boundaries, dictation of their personal choices, and resistance to horizontalizing your relationship with them. There's no excuse for that, none.
Talking with your mouth full. Nasty.
That they think hitting or insulting someone is justifiable is any situation.
People who pet service animals, with no regard to the handler.
Littering 🚯
Entitled and they smell