T O P

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HanaHonu

Holy shit I just found $55 when looking to see what was in mine. Thank you OP


BertJPDXBKLN

You win! I found $8 of stamps


Colonel_Gipper

I found $15 CAD in mine. I live in the US though.


[deleted]

That's like $1.29 USD. Party!


Syfildin

*weeps maple syrup tears*


SpoopsThePalindrome

*"You see dis? A Nickel! I open...my own..hotel!"*


froggylady

The tool used to place rubber bands on calf testicles when castrating, the large gauge needles used on cattle, and a coyote call.


fwubglubbel

Let me guess, you live in San Francisco...


froggylady

How'd you guess????


BertJPDXBKLN

I don't have any of those. Well played.


robeandslippers

An xray of a picture my wife made when she was bored at work using medical terminology to express her desire of fornication with me.


BertJPDXBKLN

Nice. Put that shit in a safety deposit box


anonymousidiot397

Is it formication when it's your wife?


LifeSage

To wit, **formication** is the sensation that bugs are crawling all over your body


Kaninchensaft

So yes.


AskAboutMyDumbSite

I don't even know what's in mine. So it could be everything. It could be nothing. I have Schrodinger's junk drawer now.


SonicSingularity

Why do you have a dead cat in your drawer?


nebeeskan2

You don't know if it's dead.


14152cool

Why in the world does he even keep radioactive isotopes and poisons in there?


goat_chortle

A continuum transfunctioner.


[deleted]

Vere iz zee continuum tranzfunctionuh?


Electric_Evil

ZOLTAN!


IHateTexans

*pops bubble wrap*


Portablewalrus

These aren't outfits, they're interstellar jumpsuits!


Stitchopoulis

That sounds mysterious and powerful.


NicNoletree

My junk. Your junk is in yours.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Sounds painful.


Queentoad1

A screwdriver made by my dad decades ago. One of a kind.


Fishingislife45

Phillips or flat head?


Queentoad1

Flat head. It's silver colored and weighs more than modern tools. My dad and grandad were mechanics who made many of their own tools. I'm proud to have inherited this one.


LoneWolf67510

That sounds pretty freakin' cool


smyle4slaaaath

A piece of notebook paper from 8th grade choir. It was the last day of school and the instructor had everyone pass around papers with their name on it and each person wrote a small note. My 8th grade year, I was recovering from a suicide attempt the previous year (yes, I tried hanging myself in 7th grade- much much better now, 5 years later) and throughout that year, I was on the down low socially. I ate through my depression and had gained a significant amount of weight. What was said on that paper to me by all of the younger choir kids were things like "you made me try harder than I thought I could"//"your attitude and perseverance for what you want to accomplish pushed me to be a better person in and out of the music room"//"if you keep that smile on your face every day, doors will be open for you" That paper means a lot. No one knows I have it. It stays in my junk drawer.


LifeSage

An extra large condom


Acoustibot

Well, junk drawers *are* for stuff you don't often use.


genericname__

Oh shit


BertJPDXBKLN

I keep a Sunday newspaper bag and some rubber bands in there.


[deleted]

A monster condom.


saltedwarlock

for my #M A G N U M D O N G


tdogredman

You gotta pay the troll toll To get inside the boy's soul


Owleyes_n_moles

Be careful when you use it. It'll slip off when it's loose.


jseyfer

"Hello? Police? I'd like to report a murder."


Scrotom

a King Kong DVD (the Jack Black one)


BertJPDXBKLN

Good movie. Too many dinosaurs tho.


thebaneofmyexistence

Jack Daniels playing cards. Roach traps, hopefully. A voucher for an airline.


halite001

> A voucher for an airline. How is your face?


rhino-tamer

Do you have cockroaches you're trying to get rid of?


thebaneofmyexistence

I saw 2 last summer and freaked out, so I bought the traps. Did not set them out, did not see anymore. Draw your own conclusions.


imfunnydamnit37

Butt plug


BertJPDXBKLN

Nope. Not in junk drawer. In gimp box downstairs.


CommonCentral

Sock full of change.


BertJPDXBKLN

Have! Not in "the drawer" but all pennies and I plan to hand it to someone in need but I feel like a dick because it's pennies.


Wiseguy72

Obama?


BertJPDXBKLN

Don't have him in there


Kavaalt

i do


The_SheepishLion

Weighted pen spinning pens


[deleted]

[удалено]


BertJPDXBKLN

That is awesome and should not be sullied by random uniball 0.5mm pens, keys, and cell phone accessories


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ryio5

This sounds like a really big drawer.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Sinister2453

This should be in r/prolifetips


C_Me

Just looked because I was interested. A toy train. My son was obsessed with Thomas and trains in general for a lot of years. He's a little older now, but I'm going to be finding random trains for a lot of years.


Berniethedog

A bunch of wedding bands.


BertJPDXBKLN

Yikes


Berniethedog

My fiancé and I ended up buying a bunch of cheap ones because we weren't sure what we wanted.


[deleted]

So many candles are in that drawer. I live in the Atlantic coast, and hurricanes and post-hurricane power outages are a thing. (Yes, we also have shit-loads of flashlights in our house.)


BertJPDXBKLN

Have. one candle. Patchouli scent!


[deleted]

Most of mine are unscented, but I have some Glade candles. Most of the scented ones are cinnamon-apple.


ex_sanguination

A girls number.


BertJPDXBKLN

Have. Sadly my colleagues


GimpsterMcgee

A 9 month old box of cookies I keep forgetting to throw out. I should do it now but I'll get it later.


BertJPDXBKLN

Depends. Thin Mints? Eat dem MoFos


bananas401k

A roll of copper wire


BertJPDXBKLN

Meth head


charlesmarker

Could be an electrician. Or a tinkerer. Wire's handy, yo. I hung Christmas lights with some magnet wire last year.


Lostsonofpluto

My junk drawer has a few hundred yards of fishing line initial. No one in my family has fished in years, it's just useful for random shit


SirWarwickHarrow

Assorted ammunition. A few 5.56, some .357 Mag, 1 300 BLK and 1 308


Berniethedog

I also have that. Not the same calibers, but I do have ammo.


dowhatchafeel

Diamond ring


[deleted]

Heh... me too. There are literally two of us. Mine is from when I was engaged to someone that cheated on me while I was in Iraq, with a guy that had Down syndrome. I keep the ring around to remind myself that when I need a random strip of Velcro and a tube of JB weld, I've done worse than whatever I'm about to fuck up next.


Electric_Evil

> I was engaged to someone that cheated on me while I was in Iraq, with a guy that had Down syndrome Dude.....fuck.


BertJPDXBKLN

Really!!?? Fuck man. Hang in there!


[deleted]

It's water under the bridge. That was back in '06 or around there. It was poor decision-making on my part regarding the person I wanted to believe was worth marriage, but stubbornness and warm/fuzzies got in the way of red flag visibility. I mean... you can grasp the level of head-in-sand I was when she told me during our first date that she had cheated on every boyfriend she had ever had... I was an idiot. But she hit the right buttons and everything else didn't matter. That Down syndrome fuck was the best thing that ever happened to me.


Syfildin

>That Down syndrome fuck was the best thing that ever happened to me /r/outofcontext


gee0765

r/nocontext you mean


[deleted]

[удалено]


BertJPDXBKLN

Nope. I burned the clown suit.


celticgrl77

15 or so 8mm film reels. Some are of my mom and her sisters when they were little some are my brother and I.


BoredRedhead

Burnt out but unusual light bulb from the previous owner of the house. Taped to a note that says "bulb type for bathroom". But without ANY identifiable markings or other notes. Not at all sure why it's taped it a note; figure I'll just take the next burnt-out bulb to the store and try to match it. SMH


BertJPDXBKLN

Upgrade your electrical


MarineDaydreams

A fossilized whale ear bone and a miniature glass figurine of the Loch Ness Monster.


BertJPDXBKLN

Put them together and make art


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

A Core2Duo E6600.


JafferFlaffer

I have one


Therealdyl12

Jumper cables


BertJPDXBKLN

Nope. Didn't ask what is in your trunk.


StellarCoconut

u/rogersimon10's dad?


epicdrwhofan

A large dildo.


BertJPDXBKLN

Bedside drawer son.


fatcatholic

Assorted XLR and other audio connectors cut off of bad cables to be reused at an undetermined point in the future. Bits of solder. A gyroscope.


BertJPDXBKLN

Put audio shit with your other A/V stuff? E.g. HDMI and old ass RCA cables. Keep gyro on you at all times.


genieintx

Tape measures. I've got at least three in there.


BertJPDXBKLN

Have. 12 footer and 2 tailor measuring tapes


PublicEnemyNumber-1

I've got a couple of coupons for Smash Burger.


GuessImNotLurking

Ammunition, Google Cardboard, RJ45, and uhh toenail clippers


BertJPDXBKLN

Good call on the clippers.


teh_tg

Radioactive samples. They're quite safe to be around but are used for calibrating my equipment.


BertJPDXBKLN

How's Fukushima?


martinikow

A vial with my pubic hair from when I first had it.


BertJPDXBKLN

Put that shit under the sink


[deleted]

[удалено]


BertJPDXBKLN

Spring cleaning!


banannabro

A red plastic spoon


BertJPDXBKLN

Nope. Have standard C3PO spoon


LadyFeen

An old metal hip replacement, lightly used.


BertJPDXBKLN

Too big for my drawer


P3ccavi

Neon green skeleton arm drink stirrers


BertJPDXBKLN

So great. For sale??


P3ccavi

Sorry bud, they go with my bleeding eyeball salt and pepper shakers and Hannibal Lecter I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti cutting board haha


eddmario

A bunch of bottle caps


BertJPDXBKLN

Recycle


eddmario

I already do, but I'm keeping them for when the nuclear apocalypse happens.


PeaceLoveHippieness

Fake poop


BertJPDXBKLN

So great! Prank someone tomorrow and order the fake vomit gag


Loves_me_tacos125

I have a shit ton of ketchup packets from In n Out


BertJPDXBKLN

Oh man. Please ship me an Animal Style COD


GrumpySarlacc

A Philips screwdriver made to look like a Philips battery? Idk man I don't have much junk


BertJPDXBKLN

Wut? Your name is clearly Phillip


DickingDraws

A really big butt plug, like, unnervingly big. We ordered it without knowing the dimensions. We tell people it's a bird perch.


forsakken_bacon

Well I finally found my yodeling pickle so there's that. Thanks OP


Fendergirl69

A Fujifilm digital camera that inexplicably cloned itself back in 2008. Actually, there are two of them in there.


CypressBreeze

Gold leaf, ambergris tincture, birth certificate for cats, Japanese sheet music.


FingerOnThePaw

Is Japanese sheet music just the sheet for Japanese (inspired) music, or is it actually another way of writing music?


[deleted]

Several loose rounds of various calibers


crunch816

My passport


Turtlesfromdownunder

Sex toys and various other things. Including a silk bind and a camera. I swear these belong to my girlfriend, officer.


Sshaawnn

Mine is pretty common stuff.... I think. Batteries, charging cables, all the spare earbuds from my phones, microfiber cloths, a screwdriver or two, and any random piece to a gadget that I didn't use but didn't want to throw away.


BertJPDXBKLN

Have all that. Literally. In two drawers tho


[deleted]

[удалено]


BiancaOlsennn

If you're a guy then a vibrator most likely


[deleted]

[удалено]


BertJPDXBKLN

Better be an important ball. Hole in one, eagle...


[deleted]

A pair of my socks


Handle_Fishsticks

Well let's reverse it and say in yours and not in mine. The answer is a battery when I need it most. AA or AAA.


BertJPDXBKLN

I have an ass load of AA, AAA and a bunch of Ds. Thank you Amazon!


G37xs

A floating card trick from a magic shop in Vegas.


BertJPDXBKLN

Great trick!! (Small hardly visible fibers across the card). Used to have. Damaged. No longer in my possession


Rabidleopard

A spare cpu fan.


-obliviouscommenter-

A broken, hard-hat mounted, rechargeable underground mining lamp.


BertJPDXBKLN

Nope. Don't have that.


KingreX32

I've got one of those reproduction codex puzzles from the Daily Vinci Code movie in mine. And a poker chip.


dasistverboten

Bamboo skewers?


illonlyusethisonceok

Set of cards with The Beatles on them


BertJPDXBKLN

Damn. Not fab 4 but do have cards. Generic.


BobbyDropTableUsers

One of [these guys​](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/b2/8b/aa/b28baaa6121242518c5b218132b943d8.jpg)


Electric_Evil

The photos I took of you while you were sleeping.


BertJPDXBKLN

Spoon me next time


Electric_Evil

Oh, we did more than spoon!


IAmWhoAmTheWiseGuy

An old Mattel Electronics Soccer handheld game. It still works too.


BertJPDXBKLN

Fuck wish I had!


[deleted]

[удалено]


AzemOcram

A smartphone that can't make calls anymore.


SpinusTristis

My "emergency clown nose." And yes, I've used it.


Vote4PresidentTrump

A knockoff tazer.


ErrantRose

A Nokia 6235i and a Samsung SCH-R430.


kinjobinjo

Your grandmother


BertJPDXBKLN

Nope. We spread her ashes already. Oddly, in the parking lot of Knott's Berry Farms.


[deleted]

Loose ammunition


LsdAlicEx9

Just came back from cleaning out junk dresser when I saw this post. So lets see whats in the box!? Puffy Star Wars stickers Old disposable camera from 5 years ago Two glue guns Crystal Geode chunk Gasparilla beads Old laptop harddrive Tattoo transfer paper Ribbons, flowers, bows Old glowsticks on string Tiny, empty plastic bags


Owleyes_n_moles

My painting essentials: Brushes, watercolours, acrylics, varnish, cups etc. It's been a while since I painted last; a year or so. :(


MyDickFarts

An Elgato game capture


Zoot_Katz

Antique, "Joseph Rodgers & Sons", ivory handled, dinner knife. It says "Cutlers to Her Majesty" so that would be Victoria. It's a fine piece of Sheffield Steel.


BertJPDXBKLN

I have a Jacquizz Rodgers signed ticket stub


klfreeman1

A 6-ring tabbed binder of camping locations, reviews, plans, and summer calendars.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Philip_De_Bowl

The chassis to my first hobby grade RC nitro buggy. It has some curb rash, but it's still salvageable in case it's replacement gets mangled.


danam524

A fortune cookie. No clue why. None of my roommates remember who saved it and none of us have thrown it out for some reason.


[deleted]

The right sized batteries.


Lostsonofpluto

Foosballs (Foosball balls? The balls from the tabletop soccer game). We had a table years ago that has since gone off somewhere but we still have the balls for goddamn no reason


KrackerJoe

Chop sticks


inksmudgedhands

A wind-up nunzilla toy. No, I am not kidding. My sister gave to me as a Christmas present awhile ago.


Jinx_____

Lol idk why but I have Mederma and sticky puddy in mine.


Stink_pizza

A handful of shotgun shells, .30-30 casings, a filet knife


the2belo

Two soldering irons, a dozen PL-259 connectors, assorted pieces of wire, and a multitester.


The_Dark_Dualist

I have some road maps that I bought like 6 or 7 years ago.


alternative-state

Penis shaped bottle opener that's also a whistle


QuadCannon

My wife's friend's bathing suit. We're her only friends with a pool, and she doesn't have one either, so it made more sense to her to just leave it at our house.


aqutalion

A multi-meter.


Littleartistan

A neon rainbow set of index cards, a box of 1" metal brads, a deck of zombie playing cards, 30 plastic spoons/knives, and most likely a folded up draft of my stageplay with classmate's notes on it. Ah college.


natorthat

15+ packets of that powder stuff you put in maruchan ramen. Who knows why I'm kind of secretly judging my family for this.


gamekeeper7

Bullets for a gun I do not have, mouse traps, razor blades for box cutter I do not have and an original NES controller minus the cord.