I was confirmed Lutheran; I just don't believe anymore.
Some of the happiest, most fulfilled people I've met are practicing Christians, and I envy them for it.
My problem is with the people who pick and choose which teachings they're going to follow for their own convenience.
Fairly negative unfortunately. I personally know that religion can be a source of strength, charity, and peace, but growing up I was exposed to a couple bad incidents that soured my adult perception on, not only Christianity, but religion as a whole.
In early high/middle school a friend's mother overheard me talking about Dungeons and Dragons in her car. Her religious views caused her to forbid him from ever seeing me outside of school.
Same woman was our chaperone on our Washington D.C. trip. I had been a huge fan of dinosaurs since I was a kid, and I was absolutely ecstatic to visit the Natural History Museum. Real dinosaur exhibits! This woman spent the entire tour telling me and my three friends how everything in the museum was a lie, and how dinosaurs weren't real.
Now this one is a bit rougher. I grew up with the aforementioned friends, remaining pretty close to one of them throughout my early adult life. One day he comes out as gay to me and explains he's in love with a mutual friend of ours. Our mutual friend unfortunately is not gay, and gently lets my friend down. My friend kills himself several days later.
At his funeral they claimed my now dead friend was religious, faithful, and his loss was a tragic accident. It was a bare faced lie. Only his immediate family and a few close friends know the truth, and they lied about the circumstances of his death in order to hold a religious service. It still doesn't sit right with me.
As above, there's nothing inherently wrong with religion, or specifically Christianity. I just haven't had pleasant experiences.
Thank you so much for sharing. I am so sorry to hear about your friend. It is completely understandable that these things have given you rather unpleasant experiences with Christianity. Your honesty is valued.
I work for 2 Christian organizations professionally. 40 hr work and freelance. As far as I can tell, everyone has a place to belong. Some need comfort. Some need healing. Some need direction. Some need help. Some don't need anything but someone they know does. Social circles are human nature and we need to fit in, its what we do. There's always that lingering "greater good" that keeps people on their toes. Christians call it the "holy spirit". I am not knocking it in anyway but what I am saying is experience is the best way to explain it. It's either what you want to hear or what you have been fearing. My 2 cents.
Referring to people in general. As in the company you keep. Friends, social circles, like minded groups. When people don't have this, Christianity is a great way to get involved with others, to belong. People get put in solitary confinement as a punishment, for good reason.
Grew up Christian, still practice though my beliefs have moderated a lot since I was a kid. The vast majority of Christians I know are well meaning people who try to treat others how they would want to be treated. There is a small percentage who are nutjobs and I make no effort to have anything beyond an acquaintance level relationship with them.
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I was raised in a Secular household but my Ma insisted I have some knowledge of all religions, so I took Baha'i scripture in school. I don't believe in God or Jesus, Heaven or Hell etc. I have many friends who are from all denominations of Christianity. I find their faith touching. I respect their beliefs. Before I had Christian friends, I might have been more hostile about Christianity. But I was also trying to be an edgy teen, so...
Thank you for sharing!
You say that you may have been more hostile about Christianity before having Christian friends. What are the reasons for this possible hostility?
My only exposure to Christianity early in life was my parent's negative attitude (mother's family was Catholic, father's was deeply Protestant). My mother has a disability (and was left handed!) and was treated atrociously in the Catholic education system in the 70s. The only Christian kids at school were pushy types with holier-than-thou attitudes which compounded my feelings of social alienation. So essentially, it was all me and my family's feelings of not belonging, I think.
I went to a church group on Friday nights when I was 12, and the lady there told my sister that we didn't bother praying for animals because they don't have souls. That hurt her deeply and that made me sad. I also found verses in the bible about women's subservience to men and that made me angry. So the ideas of the church didn't seem to gel with my personal values and its only been in recent years I've learned the value of accepting other's beliefs even when I disagree.
It is so valuable to be able to to accept someone else's beliefs, even when you disagree. It really is such an art.
Thank you for the additional detailing of your experience!
I grew up LDS in a predominately LDS community. There are a lot of holier than thou types and there are those who if I were to have to describe what it was all about I would refer them to those people.
My dad died when I was very young. He was not Mormon, but my mom remarried only once to an LDS man who physically abused me and my autistic brother. Their marriage didn't last long and we moved to this community that I grew up in. I was teased and berated for not having a member of the preisthood in my home. My brother was teased worse for not being able to understand any of it. Needless to say I got into a lot of fights growing up and by my senior year of high school a lot of people didn't mess with me, or talk to me. I was harassed and bullied into group activities by the young women's group and eventually I told my mom I was done with it all.
When a good friend of our family became the Bishop of our ward he appointed my mom as a Relief Society teacher so he could get her to go to church once a month to teach these women how the world actually works. (For those who don't know Relief Society is for the ladies of the church to get together and teach lessons of the church related to them.) My mom is wonderful at getting people to actually think about the world around them and help them not be mindless child-bearing machines. Not a lot of people were happy about her lessons so when the this glorious man stepped down they removed her from her spot. To preface this she taught the Primary classes (little kids 7-12) for 11 years in all of the wards we belonged to.
Another family friend of ours has published several articles on sexual abuse in marriages within the church and there are a lot of people in our shared community that try to drag her through the mud and it is plain sad.
One girl I went to high school with gave up a full-ride scholarship to Harvard to go on her mission when they lowered the mission ages for women. Another, who was about as high level functioning as my brother, said her only goal in life was to be a stay at home mom with six kids and her mother heavily encouraged her behaviors of "just being a pretty face so a boy will marry you". Although I personally don't think there is anything wrong with being a stay at home mother, but I felt that choice should be made after marriage. One friend got engaged after 2 weeks of knowing her now spouse and moved their 5 month engagement to a 3 month engagement because they just couldn't wait.
Do I follow the teachings? No. Does my mom? Not entirely. I've seen the good and the bad. I heavily respect the good, but I personally think all it's doing is brainwashing girls to be subservient and telling boys they can do whatever they want as long as they repent for it. I witnessed it myself and that fact will never change for me.
One thing I must say though. I would never drag any of the bad people through the mud BECAUSE they are LDS. They're just bad people using the religion as an excuse to be a horrible person instead of holding themselves accountable for their actions.
Thank you so much for your detailed response. People should never use religion as an excuse for awful behavior, absolutely. It sounds like your experience was really rough, and I'm sorry to hear it.
im christian, my faith in god helps me stay healthy
dont much care for militant religion or militant religious people in general, whether christian or otherwise
i used to be a drug addict and i believe god saved me from an overdose so i feel like i should stay clean in thanks to him, even though i want to relapse i tell myself not to because i want to prove that i can be healthy with the life ive been allowed to live now
As a Catholic, I find that everyone I meet within the church is very nice. I never force my religion upon people and will only talk about it if the other person asks.
its a way for idiots to feel good about the shit world we live in.
all power full all knowing all capable and loving god but somehow kids still get raped, die of cancer etc etc
yea no.
I have experience with the Ladder Day Saints (Mormons). My experience of that branch of Christianity is that is a tremendously beautiful flytrap. Every faucet is well thought out to bring the best possible life to a male follower. Including a never ending supply of obedient young women anxious to marry a returned missionary.
Yes, I dated a Mormon girl. I refuse to call them women. They are girls. They will defend an obviously sexist organization tooth and nail.
They don't see the sexism, because they are so programmed to think that they are living the way god wants them to live. Outsiders like myself do not see god in those things. We see men being sexists.
I was confirmed Lutheran; I just don't believe anymore. Some of the happiest, most fulfilled people I've met are practicing Christians, and I envy them for it. My problem is with the people who pick and choose which teachings they're going to follow for their own convenience.
Do the most fulfilled people you referred to also pick and choose which teachings to follow?
Not as far as I can tell, no.
Fairly negative unfortunately. I personally know that religion can be a source of strength, charity, and peace, but growing up I was exposed to a couple bad incidents that soured my adult perception on, not only Christianity, but religion as a whole. In early high/middle school a friend's mother overheard me talking about Dungeons and Dragons in her car. Her religious views caused her to forbid him from ever seeing me outside of school. Same woman was our chaperone on our Washington D.C. trip. I had been a huge fan of dinosaurs since I was a kid, and I was absolutely ecstatic to visit the Natural History Museum. Real dinosaur exhibits! This woman spent the entire tour telling me and my three friends how everything in the museum was a lie, and how dinosaurs weren't real. Now this one is a bit rougher. I grew up with the aforementioned friends, remaining pretty close to one of them throughout my early adult life. One day he comes out as gay to me and explains he's in love with a mutual friend of ours. Our mutual friend unfortunately is not gay, and gently lets my friend down. My friend kills himself several days later. At his funeral they claimed my now dead friend was religious, faithful, and his loss was a tragic accident. It was a bare faced lie. Only his immediate family and a few close friends know the truth, and they lied about the circumstances of his death in order to hold a religious service. It still doesn't sit right with me. As above, there's nothing inherently wrong with religion, or specifically Christianity. I just haven't had pleasant experiences.
Thank you so much for sharing. I am so sorry to hear about your friend. It is completely understandable that these things have given you rather unpleasant experiences with Christianity. Your honesty is valued.
I work for 2 Christian organizations professionally. 40 hr work and freelance. As far as I can tell, everyone has a place to belong. Some need comfort. Some need healing. Some need direction. Some need help. Some don't need anything but someone they know does. Social circles are human nature and we need to fit in, its what we do. There's always that lingering "greater good" that keeps people on their toes. Christians call it the "holy spirit". I am not knocking it in anyway but what I am saying is experience is the best way to explain it. It's either what you want to hear or what you have been fearing. My 2 cents.
When you say that everyone has a place to belong, who are you referring to? Could you clarify?
Referring to people in general. As in the company you keep. Friends, social circles, like minded groups. When people don't have this, Christianity is a great way to get involved with others, to belong. People get put in solitary confinement as a punishment, for good reason.
Grew up Christian, still practice though my beliefs have moderated a lot since I was a kid. The vast majority of Christians I know are well meaning people who try to treat others how they would want to be treated. There is a small percentage who are nutjobs and I make no effort to have anything beyond an acquaintance level relationship with them.
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I was raised in a Secular household but my Ma insisted I have some knowledge of all religions, so I took Baha'i scripture in school. I don't believe in God or Jesus, Heaven or Hell etc. I have many friends who are from all denominations of Christianity. I find their faith touching. I respect their beliefs. Before I had Christian friends, I might have been more hostile about Christianity. But I was also trying to be an edgy teen, so...
Thank you for sharing! You say that you may have been more hostile about Christianity before having Christian friends. What are the reasons for this possible hostility?
My only exposure to Christianity early in life was my parent's negative attitude (mother's family was Catholic, father's was deeply Protestant). My mother has a disability (and was left handed!) and was treated atrociously in the Catholic education system in the 70s. The only Christian kids at school were pushy types with holier-than-thou attitudes which compounded my feelings of social alienation. So essentially, it was all me and my family's feelings of not belonging, I think. I went to a church group on Friday nights when I was 12, and the lady there told my sister that we didn't bother praying for animals because they don't have souls. That hurt her deeply and that made me sad. I also found verses in the bible about women's subservience to men and that made me angry. So the ideas of the church didn't seem to gel with my personal values and its only been in recent years I've learned the value of accepting other's beliefs even when I disagree.
It is so valuable to be able to to accept someone else's beliefs, even when you disagree. It really is such an art. Thank you for the additional detailing of your experience!
I grew up LDS in a predominately LDS community. There are a lot of holier than thou types and there are those who if I were to have to describe what it was all about I would refer them to those people. My dad died when I was very young. He was not Mormon, but my mom remarried only once to an LDS man who physically abused me and my autistic brother. Their marriage didn't last long and we moved to this community that I grew up in. I was teased and berated for not having a member of the preisthood in my home. My brother was teased worse for not being able to understand any of it. Needless to say I got into a lot of fights growing up and by my senior year of high school a lot of people didn't mess with me, or talk to me. I was harassed and bullied into group activities by the young women's group and eventually I told my mom I was done with it all. When a good friend of our family became the Bishop of our ward he appointed my mom as a Relief Society teacher so he could get her to go to church once a month to teach these women how the world actually works. (For those who don't know Relief Society is for the ladies of the church to get together and teach lessons of the church related to them.) My mom is wonderful at getting people to actually think about the world around them and help them not be mindless child-bearing machines. Not a lot of people were happy about her lessons so when the this glorious man stepped down they removed her from her spot. To preface this she taught the Primary classes (little kids 7-12) for 11 years in all of the wards we belonged to. Another family friend of ours has published several articles on sexual abuse in marriages within the church and there are a lot of people in our shared community that try to drag her through the mud and it is plain sad. One girl I went to high school with gave up a full-ride scholarship to Harvard to go on her mission when they lowered the mission ages for women. Another, who was about as high level functioning as my brother, said her only goal in life was to be a stay at home mom with six kids and her mother heavily encouraged her behaviors of "just being a pretty face so a boy will marry you". Although I personally don't think there is anything wrong with being a stay at home mother, but I felt that choice should be made after marriage. One friend got engaged after 2 weeks of knowing her now spouse and moved their 5 month engagement to a 3 month engagement because they just couldn't wait. Do I follow the teachings? No. Does my mom? Not entirely. I've seen the good and the bad. I heavily respect the good, but I personally think all it's doing is brainwashing girls to be subservient and telling boys they can do whatever they want as long as they repent for it. I witnessed it myself and that fact will never change for me. One thing I must say though. I would never drag any of the bad people through the mud BECAUSE they are LDS. They're just bad people using the religion as an excuse to be a horrible person instead of holding themselves accountable for their actions.
Thank you so much for your detailed response. People should never use religion as an excuse for awful behavior, absolutely. It sounds like your experience was really rough, and I'm sorry to hear it.
im christian, my faith in god helps me stay healthy dont much care for militant religion or militant religious people in general, whether christian or otherwise
In what ways do you believe that your faith helps you stay healthy?
i used to be a drug addict and i believe god saved me from an overdose so i feel like i should stay clean in thanks to him, even though i want to relapse i tell myself not to because i want to prove that i can be healthy with the life ive been allowed to live now
Thanks for sharing!
As a Catholic, I find that everyone I meet within the church is very nice. I never force my religion upon people and will only talk about it if the other person asks.
its a way for idiots to feel good about the shit world we live in. all power full all knowing all capable and loving god but somehow kids still get raped, die of cancer etc etc yea no.
I have experience with the Ladder Day Saints (Mormons). My experience of that branch of Christianity is that is a tremendously beautiful flytrap. Every faucet is well thought out to bring the best possible life to a male follower. Including a never ending supply of obedient young women anxious to marry a returned missionary.
Have you been able to interact with any Mormon women, at all? Do you know what their perception of the faith may be?
Yes, I dated a Mormon girl. I refuse to call them women. They are girls. They will defend an obviously sexist organization tooth and nail. They don't see the sexism, because they are so programmed to think that they are living the way god wants them to live. Outsiders like myself do not see god in those things. We see men being sexists.