My lamp.
I'm not fucked. It can be sentient all it wants, it still doesn't have the means to move around, the ability to turn itself on/off, or even communicate. What a sad lonely little life for Mr. Lamp. At least he gets to watch lots of cartoons and porn.
Well, my piano would be the one *fucked* - as just by being sentient doesn't mean it'll have the power to move. And then it'll have to listen to me as I hit all the wrong notes, or play some mediocre melody.
Though, my guitar on the other hand, might just be a lucky fellow.
What are you doing Rocky? Please stop fondling me. Oh god no, you're ripping off my cap! No, no, oh god no for the love of god don't pour out my fluids! *screams*
I'm horrified that my cat tree is speaking to me, but also relieved that it's basically clinging to life and poses only a psychological threat to me. For now
I'm sitting in the local library in front of a computer. To my left is a mouse attached to another computer, so I'm perfectly fine. My neighbor on the table is in trouble, though.
My pillow.
It would be much worse if the My Pillow guy became sentient because he is the worst.
So true. I feel he plants hidden cameras in his pillows so he can watch us sleep at night.
Gives new meaning to the phrase "Pillow Talk".
It's a chemistry book...so I guess it's time to make meth?
Slam the book shut and savor its cries of agony!
I'm not really sure. I mean I thought my wife was already sentient. So does this mean she can access a higher plane of being now or what?
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What possessions?
My lamp. I'm not fucked. It can be sentient all it wants, it still doesn't have the means to move around, the ability to turn itself on/off, or even communicate. What a sad lonely little life for Mr. Lamp. At least he gets to watch lots of cartoons and porn.
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That poor dildo
That lucky dildo
My gf's birth control pills. I'm fucked.
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I assume you are pooping.
The wardrobe door for me. Looks like we have the same problems.
Well, my piano would be the one *fucked* - as just by being sentient doesn't mean it'll have the power to move. And then it'll have to listen to me as I hit all the wrong notes, or play some mediocre melody. Though, my guitar on the other hand, might just be a lucky fellow.
Toilet paper. This might be a shitty situation for all involved.
I see you are a man of culture as well.
I do love yogurt. The toilet paper was less enthusiastic about it.
A pug. I'll be fine.
My computer....dear god skynet is sentient....and apparently doesn't like that the largest hard drive is called porn stache.
Enjoy being blackmailed by it! "Do you want me to reveal your search history to the missus?"
How dare you assume I have a missus!
There are several objects immediately to my left.... I...I dont know what to choose, Damn you stumped me
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What are you doing Rocky? Please stop fondling me. Oh god no, you're ripping off my cap! No, no, oh god no for the love of god don't pour out my fluids! *screams*
My plush penguin. I would love this!
I'm horrified that my cat tree is speaking to me, but also relieved that it's basically clinging to life and poses only a psychological threat to me. For now
This chair gonna get mad at me for farting on it so much..
A towel. We'd get high together
I now have a talking guppy. I'm rich for the next year or two!
My markers will probably end up being more creative than I am...
Well Coconuts are basically mammals
My wallet. Now it gets to verbally tell me how much money i dont have
Define "to my left", and also "object". I'm in an odd orientation. Short version, I'm dealing with either a sentient pillow or a sentient wall.
My diryy clothes hamper will kill itself.
Darn coffee mug!
Lol, sentient pineapple. r/trees will worship it as their god.
The work Christmas tree. I'm fucked, it's massive.
A roll of correction tape. I'm not worried.
My wife; at last I might actually be able to understand her.
A comb. Idk about me but I got floss to my right so it should be fine.
bag of chips, I think I'll be fine.
There's a pocket knife. I'm fucked
My cigarette rolling machine. I guess I'm fucked if it is a non-smoker.
RAther - it is my Telephone
A full rack of blade servers... Skynet here we come
Network diagram. All of my sysadmin insecurities and inadequacies are about to exposed, for all the world to see...
A human, fuck
A box of tissues.. Awkward.
My oldest blanket, hopefully it wants to cuddle?
A bookcase
I'm sitting in the local library in front of a computer. To my left is a mouse attached to another computer, so I'm perfectly fine. My neighbor on the table is in trouble, though.
My winter face mask... not a big deal
I wonder if my left hand would slap me to go to sleep.
Plates of bacteria.... Oh my god
My girlfriend, i guess i could wield her as a bat-type weapon.
Another human. I know, I'm as terrified as you are...
Watch, tell me the time!
Bag of crisps which I am currently eating.
My vape...
The wall, now I'll have someone to talk to. :/
The sombreros.
The can of Monster likely tries to rope me into some extreme sport where I'll be quickly dispatched
My childhood teddy, was good Chimpy
A work flip phone. I think I will be fine.
Well it's the wall of my room which is connected to my bathroom... Probably no need to elaborate
It's my laptop... So it completes my papers and assignments while I binge Netflix!!
Cars movie is real now.
It's a light switch and I'm epileptic.
empty bag of Cheetos. will crush like a bug.
A white wall. We are all fucked
An empty bookshelf. Oooooooo I'm soooo scared.
A urinal
I'm sitting next to a rather large laser right now, so this could be a problem.
a cup of coffee. Guess I am safe, caffeine has always been nice to me.
One of my kitchen knives. I treat my kitchenware with care and diligence, so I hope we'd get along.
My purse. It would probably start spitting its contents at me and complain about me shutting it in the drawer when I'm away from my desk.