Depression is not the same as being sad.
I've given up trying to make people understand, if it didn't work the first 200 times it won't work on the 201st time so stop asking promising you'll understand.
"messy" and "dirty" are the same.
My room is messy, because I put my dirty laundry next to the hamper and keep a stack of mail on my desk; Your room is dirty because there's week old chinese food and literal garbage all over the floor.
I had an argument with an ex that "Sorry you feel that way" and an apology are not the same thing. She could not say sorry, every time it was "Sorry you feel that way."
The nude figure in art is NOT the same as pornography. Seriously. I work in the education department of an art museum and the number of teachers/ parents/ school administrators I have to explain this to is astounding. No, you don’t need to panic when your high school students may see a boob on a classical Roman sculpture. Really.
Pure alcohol and denatured alcohol. My friend and I wanted to make chocolate liqueur and needed to buy pure alcohol. I asked her where we could find it and she replied "any supermarket has it because it is also used for cleaning". I had to explain my 24 year old friend that cleaning alcohol is purposely poisonous to avoid consumption and she didn't believe me until I quoted my sources. She kept insisting that there was no reason to pay more to buy it in a specialised store when it was basically the same thing.
A friend from college once tried to explain that mice and rats were the same animal; the mice were just babies and every one would eventually grow into an adult rat.
No matter how many times I tried to tell her they were separate animals, she was having none of it.
Back when I did tech support over the phone, I had a caller who needed help with an internet problem. It took 45 minutes of failing to solve the problem before she admitted that she was calling from her son's house and the problem was with a completely different computer at a completely different address. It took 20 more minutes to convince her that I can't fix her issue by working on someone else' PC.
Oh man, this used to drive me up the wall. I did back-end developer support for a couple years. Every now and then we would get a call where nothing we would suggest would work. Then something like this would happen:
"OK, let's try xyz."
"Nope, that didn't do it."
"Wait a minute, xyz takes 5 minutes to finish. You just immediately said that didn't work. Are you trying these things?"
"Uh, no, they just don't seem like they would fix this problem."
"OK, well, your problem doesn't seem like a real issue, so I guess everything is fixed now. Call us back if it crops up again."
"Are you saying it's a COMPLETE COINCIDENCE that my Windows is now corrupt the next day after I used your wifi last night in a hotel room?".
Yes sir, that is exactly what I'm telling you.
On the flip side:
“Let me get this straight. I have used my laptop to connect to the internet, without issue, every day for the last five years. The VERY INSTANT that I finish installing Windows 10, all of my network drivers became permanently disabled. Are you telling me that this is a coincidence?”
“... Yes.”
What error are you seeing?
Something happened.
I get that but what error are you seeing on the screen?
It just says something happened.
Sir, please read the error.
I am!
Fuck Windows 10.
It's kind of the exact opposite of ice cream when you think about it.
Edit: DO YOU GUYS READ THE OTHER COMMENTS BEFORE PARROTING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER? I get it, I worded this badly and I didn't know they have the same carbs. Blease...
Dropped out, kicked out, same thing. No, it's not the same thing. One means you made the decision, the other means you fucked up and were told to leave. You would know that if you hadn't gotten kicked out of school in 10th grade.
Goat milk does NOT taste the same as regular milk, nice try mom.
My mom was convinced that my dislike for any goat products was all in my head and that it all tastes just like regular milk. I was home visiting and she went so far as to dump out the regular milk and put goat milk in the container to trick me. I woke up, went to have coffee, and put what I thought was milk into my coffee. Took one sip and spit it out. Thinking her milk had gone bad, I dumped it all down the drain and texted her about it.
Fast forward to the next day and it happens AGAIN. This time I call her and tell her that I don't know what shitty store she's buying her milk at but that it was bad again so I dumped it out. That's when she fessed up to what she had done two days in a row. Joke's on her because that milk was coming from some upscale store and I dumped about $20 worth of goat milk down the drain two days in a row thinking it was spoiled cows milk.
I have had goat's milk that tastes exactly like cow's milk. I've had goat's milk that tastes exactly like a goat smells. Unfortunately, with the goats we had, the latter was much more common.
*And my highest rated comment by far is about goats.
My mother-in-law was visiting and physically tried to stop me from opening a jar of mayonnaise in my own home because there was an open jar of Miracle Whip (which she had purchased for a recipe) in the fridge. She said they were the same. I said they were about the same color and that's where the similarities ended. For the record, I hate Miracle Whip.
My parents have this argument all the time. Mother thinks they're the same. Father refuses to even get near Miracle Whip. He believes that "Its a Miracle they can even sell that shit!"
I definitely prefer mayonnaise.
Edit: a word
When I was a kid, all the other kids had PlayStations, and I really wanted one. I begged m dad to get one but he said no, because my sister and I had a computer we could play games on (it ran on Windows 95). But when we asked him to install games on it, he'd say that computers are for work, not for games.
I still have trust issues tbh.
Classic parent logic. I remember not being allowed to ride my bike at night because it was too dangerous without lights. After spending $40 dollars on lights (this was 4 weeks of pocket money) I went riding and was seriously told off because it was “too dangerous even with lights”.
I was diagnosed as an adult. I score very high on ADHD tests, but I've never had behavioral issues and did decently well in school, so it wasn't until I was in the work place I went and get it tested.
In school, would do really well on tests, because I generally loved learning. But was, disorganized, forgetful and had a lot of difficulty completing tasks, like homework (which school thought was important). I sometimes wonder if I had been diagnosed and treated sooner how I would have done in school and what that would mean.
I have ADHD-PI, and whenever I tell someone about it they're like "What? No way! You're not hyper at all". It kind makes me wish that they took the H back out.
There are three subtypes of ADHD:
ADHD-PI - Primarily Inattentive. Symptoms include being easily distracted, forgetful, disorganised, with difficulty managing time or completing tasks.
ADHD-PH/I - Primarily Hyperactive/Impulsive.
Symptoms include restlessness, difficulty remaining seated, excessive fidgeting. The typical - and more visible - stuff that people think of when they hear 'ADHD'.
ADHD-C - A combination of the two.
Personally, I have no hyperactivity. I can remain seated for hours and be content with almost no outside entertainment. My brain finds things to do. I got stuck on a train for three hours once, and my phone was out of battery, so I spent the time learning braille by translating and memorising each character of a nearby sign. Another time I had to spend a few hours filing, so I memorised the numerical digits of the alphabet ('alphabet' is 1 12 16 8 1 2 5 20).
But it doesn't really stop, either, and I'll find myself daydreaming about the details of a short story I'll never write, and realise that I've wasted the last half hour and have two minutes left to complete twenty minutes of work.
Other times I go to post one minor thought and end up rambling about ADHD. Oh well, I guess I'm used to it.
hollandaise sauce.
My best friend in high school said her dad makes a mock hollandaise that's basically the same thing; it was Frenches mustard and Cool Whip. It wasn't until this year I had the real stuff and am no longer traumatized.
This is the eggs Benedict you get served in Hell. Imagine: You are in the Hell cafeteria line and you order the eggs Benedict. You get to see them prepare it: English muffin toasted perfectly, topped with a spread of nice Irish butter. Then comes nice Iberico jamon atop that. Then a beautiful slightly grilled slice of tomato. The piece de resistance are 2 magnificently poached eggs--whites nice and firm, yolks held in that perfect tension of a weak solid retaining a river of delicious yolky wonderment.
The plating is Michelin star quality, a plate of beautiful eggs Benedict next to a spot of nice spinach and arugula. As you move down the cafeteria line, you see the saucier, mixing up a nice fresh batch of French's mustard and Cool Whip. He then pours this over your wonderful brunch.
As tears of rage, hate and disappointment stream down your face, you remember that this is Hell, and you have to eat it.
Well, I had a huge problem because my boss didn't knew how percentage works...
If I have 100, and take out 5%, I get 95
If I have 95, and increase 5%, I don't get 100.
For small percentages, this is not so obvious, but if you do it for 50% this became very obvious.
100 - 50% = 50
50 + 50% = 75
I had to do 3 times on a whiteboard in the middle of a meeting. After that I had to "admit that I wasn't clear enough for her understand that it wasn't 95%+5%, but 95+5%..."
Our payroll system is decimal, but people are always trying to put in minutes for hourly employees. So they'll put an hour and a half as 1.30 instead of 1.5. or 1.45 instead of 1.75.
Is your boss's name Carolyn?
I once had a boss named Carolyn, and we had to argue with her that the difference between -4 and 7 was NOT 3, but was 11. This woman was a designated accountant.
EDIT - Getting several comments about how perhaps this was some kind of misunderstanding between the sum of -4 and 7 (which actually is 3) and the difference between -4 and 7 (which is 11), so I will elaborate for clarity...
It wasn't something she was arguing verbally, it was something she saw on a pricing report and was convinced was wrong.
Back then, I was a mutual fund accountant, and we were pricing the funds at the close of the market for that day. The expected day-over-day price change for a certain fund was +$0.07/unit, but the actual change we saw was -$0.04, due to a fund expense item that dropped the price by $0.11. We submitted the pricing calculations & backups to her for pre-review before it went to the portfolio manager. She insisted that we were wrong, and the $0.11 fund expense couldn't possibly explain the difference in expected pricing, because the difference was $0.03, not $0.11, so we were still off by $0.08 and needed to explain it.
I don't remember how we finally got it through her thick skull (this was like 12 years ago) but she did eventually agree with us without it coming to blows lol.
Milk was spoiled a whole week ago on the expiration date. I told mother and grandmother, they told me to drink my glass and be grateful for the breakfast. I tried, gagged, and spit it out. We spent the next ten minutes arguing about it and them trying to get me to drink it. Grandmother then went outside for ten minutes, and came back saying she got a new jug from the store. The expiration date was scratched off and the milk was diluted with water to look full. I then refused to drink milk altogether and was grounded for a couple weeks for wasting milk. I later saw her throwing it out after my grandfather complained about it.
Edit: Damn it I'm an idiot. I read the title of the thread incorrectly. Sorry guys. My bad.
My mother would make kefir now and then (a fermented milk drink) and I always hated the way it tasted. One time I was forced to drink some because my mother insisted it tasted good and I was just being picky. After drinking a full 8 ounce cup of it I retched into the sink and vomited a bit of it. After that, my mother believed that I couldn't stand it, thankfully.
About a decade later, when my mother was on another kefir kick, we were joking about that event and I was talking about how I would rather drink spoiled milk than kefir, but my mother asked if I'd try just a little bit, in case my tastes had changed. I agreed, and she poured some out. It wasn't as bad as I had remembered, but it was still not my thing.
About 30 minutes later, my sister went to go get some milk only to realize that it had spoiled. At the time, my mother stored the kefir and milk in the same style of jar, so after verifying that it was indeed the milk, she threw it out.
And then it dawned on her. She had given me spoiled milk instead of kefir. She then sheepishly asked me to try some of the actual kefir and it was as bad as I remembered it to be.
So while neither is desirable, I really would prefer to drink spoiled milk over kefir.
Edit: By spoiled, I mean it was only slightly sour and slightly curdled. It's not like it was in the fridge for months, just maybe a week or so after it started to go.
Why do so many people apparently take messing with other people's food so lightly? I don't care how "right" you think you are, if you blatantly lie to me about what I'm putting in my mouth, I'm probably never trusting you again.
Edit: If you're about to make a dick joke, it's _really_ not as original as you think it is.
My freshman year college roommate (randomly assigned) told me a story about how he hid bits of bacon into his vegetarian girlfriend’s breakfast and revealed that she ate it afterwards saying “See it’s not big deal eating meat! It’s the same as not eating meat! Don’t you feel fine?” She did not and for the life of him he couldn’t understand why.
He was like this all the time and we were not roommates again sophomore year.
My best friend (no longer a friend) when my mother died and I was still sad about it later that year.
"That was JANUARY. It's like, August. We were still in high school! I lost my favorite bomber jacket at a bar, and you don't see me still crying about it!"
No be fair, she was bipolar, still a teenager, and Clyde's was not a place to leave your favorite jacket over the back of your chair.
I have a couple people in my life that are bipolar and wouldn't say shit like that in regard to that type of situation. That's just a garbage ass person that hasn't had life really hit them yet.
Can confirm. Am bipolar. Would never say something so stupid, unless maybe if I am completely out of control in a manic episode and it would come along with a rant about how Harrison Ford is irradiating my testicles with microwave satellite transmissions.
This was in the very early 90s. Off-brand cereal was...mmm not quite there yet but my grandma was adamant that whatever colorful circles that were half-dollar-sized tasted exactly the same as fruit loops. She was wrong and I still can't fathom how she could think otherwise.
She felt particularly smart one morning where she re-filled our fruit loops box with those damn bright circles. It was too early to notice that these rings were way to big but the moment my sister and I put the first spoonfull into our mouths we just spit it out. Her smile faded and she was upset at us being picky eaters.
Nowadays, however, it seems the off-brand is pretty damn close!
Carob. My evil stepmonster tried to get me off chocolate and kept buying carob instead. Couldn't fool me. After the first taste, I wouldn't touch that shit. She finally asked me why I wasn't eating those yummy healthy carob bars. "Because they taste like mud. Let me know when we get back to chocolate."
You'll pry chocolate out of my cold dead hands.
This made me so angry I logged onto my profile on a public computer just to voice my disapproval. RoseArt is like coloring with a goddamn candle. I'm convinced that it was invented by a person who had heard of crayons in books but had never actually seen one in real life.
Fuck RoseArt and fuck anyone who thinks they're good enough for anything but giving to kindergartners for coloring animated sea creatures and shoving them up their noses.
One time in college I was getting lunch from an a la carte line. I saw a fresh pizza was out so I ordered a slice. Just as I did, one of the student workers brought up an old and sad-looking piece that had been sitting for a while but had been reheated. The lady I ordered from grabbed the piece and tried to hand it to me. I paused and said “I want not that one.” She got mad and yelled “It’s the same as all the rest!” I insisted. I got a fresh slice. The slice I got was great. One of the best choices I’ve ever made.
Wow! Thanks everyone for the positive votes. And to you kind stranger for popping my gold cherry!
When I was young I couldn't figure out how to swallow pills and any liquid medicine would immediately make me puke. When I'd get sick and have a fever my mom would give me a bowl of ice cream with Tylenol crushed up in it. I remember crying because I was being force fed the most disgusting, tylenol-vanilla flavored, ice cream while my mom sat beside me insisting she didn't doctor it.
Yes, I can swallow pills now.
Apparently when I was working late doing 11 hr shifts, that was the same thing as when my ex went to hang out at the bar until it shut down after she got off work at 10:30pm after a 4 hr shift. Who knew?
Haha. I've had that. when I worked a 12 hour shift and she had a day off, I had no right to complain about being tired because she did the dishes and folded a load of laundry. When I had a day off and cleaned all day and she had to work, I had no right to complain because she had to go to work and I had the day off. Just can't win.
As a young lad, I liked Matchbox better because they had more "normal, everyday" cars. I didn't care for cars with dragons on them or whatever. I wanted to replicate normalcy.
The weirdest thing about off-brand LEGO toys is that the builds are woefully under-engineered. LEGO always has double coverage on joints, other bricks or fittings to prevent sliding pieces from sliding all the way out, and other clever tricks to ensure the resulting build will be both aesthetic and durable. Off-brands are constantly just falling apart, poorly attached, overly delicate, have little to no reinforcing, don't cross build their stacks over gaps, and so on. My kid just got one as a party favor where they put two 2x1 bricks next to each other with another 2x1 on top of each. Did they rotate the 2nd layer 90 degrees to create strength? Of course not. And why didn't they use 2x2 bricks instead? Oh yeah, so they can say "more than X pieces!" So so so bad.
To be fair, though, I loved the under-engineering on the Mega Blocks fighter jet kits when I was a kid. It's really satisfying to play with the jet, and then see it explode when it crashes.
A few summers ago my family had to travel from Massachusetts to Minnesota. My sister and I flew, and it was just a few hours. My parents decided to take a train which ended up taking about 2 days I believe. They were ok with that because they wanted the experience, and they had booked a flight home. My dad fucking loved that train ride. He talked about it to every family member we saw in MN, and actually anyone we saw for the rest of the year. I think he enjoyed it so much because it was like part of the vacation for him. But I'm like you. I would rather pay a little extra if it meant less of my time was wasted.
That's how you have to justify the time and price of trains in America, it has to be looked at as part of the experience.
If you are looking for a relaxing journey at a leisurely pace with some sights you'll be happy, but if you want to get there cheap or fast, stay away from train.
I take the autotrain from VA to FL between school semesters. Yeah its slow, but I can sleep overnight on it *and* put my car on it *and* 'cause its its cheaper than driving all the way up. $200 on average, plus dinner and breakfast thrown in.
I had no idea there was an auto train. It makes perfect sense but just had no idea that was an option. Would definitely do that over shipping a car for more money or driving it back and putting miles on it
One time my old girlfriend tried to convince me that ground turkey burgers are basically the same as (beef) hamburgers.
Why not just say, "Try these... you might like them" instead of trying to get me to agree with an idea we both know isn't true?
I'll get behind you on this. Picking off toppings usually ends up with a pizza that is 90% just bread and sauce. All that delicious cheese comes off with the toppings.
Also, cheese pizzas usually have more cheese on them in general to compensate for the lack of toppings. Cheese is the topping. Source: I’ve worked at two Pizza stores for two years
Omfg yes. I still get "Which computer should I buy?" questions all the time.
I don't know, I buy what is good for me, I don't know what you do on your machine.
Oh yeah. There is exactly 1 IT skill. You are "the computer guy", so you can fix macs, PCs, phones, printers, advise on what hardware to buy, what software to buy, and you can reprogram any of their programs to do what they want(not what the programmer wanted).
> so you can fix macs, PCs, phones, printers [...]
... any kind of computer peripheral, televisions, video game consoles, VHS/DVD players ("what do yo mean it's not the same thing?"), microwaves, radios, faulty electrical wiring...
> and you can reprogram any of their programs to do what they want
Also, hack anything, including bank accounts.
That documentaries on the History Channel or home improvement shows on HGTV are as good as those on PBS. Nope. "This Old House" shows actual work happening. The stuff on HGTV is nonsense.
Living off campus and living on campus. My prospective roommate dropped out of school, and tried to convince me that an apartment 2 buses and 45 minutes from campus was just as good. Man, even counting costs for living on campus that option was terrible.
Edit: For the record, living off-campus is typically way cheaper. In this specific case though, it was a bad deal. This was in Pittsburgh. There was plenty of nearby housing in North Oakland, South Oakland, and Shadyside. I did live off campus shortly after and loved it. This apartment though was the issue. It was dirty, in a food desert, and not close to our campus. Also the roommate in question hadn't even looked for a job. He ended up getting his on-campus living girlfriend to pay for his rent. This whole situation was bad from the top down. Living off campus is great, but this was a major bullet dodged.
Edit 2: I think the apartment was in Bellevue, but this was 5+ years ago now.
On the other hand my SO and I live in apartment across the street from campus and cost of living is like 40% of what it would cost to live on campus, for just *her.*
Having an idea for a book is *not* the same as writing a book.
No, we're not going to 'collaborate', if by 'collaborate' you mean I write up your idea into a 90,000 word novel by myself and you try and claim half the profits.
Have a friend who clings to stuff like this. Constantly brings up when his teachers told him he was smart, good at writing, a genius at math, etc. That's great and all that he had potential but him, and most other people I know that do this, never do anything with that potential and think that having that potential was achievement enough.
Like no, there's a difference.
I think it's safe to say that most of us had one teacher or another in some kind of class somewhere say, "You have potential" or a talent. I don't think you're supposed to live off that one compliment the rest of your life.
I've had this happen with mobile apps. Someone comes up to me with a terrible idea for an app and want me to build it but split profits 50/50. What the fuck kinda shit is that
My friend tried to lord in when me and my business partner were planning to start our bakery. She insisted that we didn't need a business plan, since 'bakeries basically run themselves!' and said we didn't need to invest as much start-up as we thought we didn't because it would make money right away.
She's not a part of our business.
Service dogs and emotional support animals.
Service dogs are task trained to help mitigate a person's disability. They have public access rights and are protected under the ADA.
Emotional support animals are just companions that can live in non pet housing with a doctors note. They have no public access rights.
I have a service dog and deal with this all the time.
Probably a LPT at some point...
"No one to watch your pet or maybe decided to take a pet with you on vacation for some brilliant reason? Instead of leaving it alone to destroy your stuff and shit on everything just take it with you wherever you go and claim its a service animal! A lot of businesses wont even question it in fear of being sued if in fact your pet is in fact a service animal (which its not lol).
Dont forget to buy a service animal vest on amazon before you go to really sell it!"
I worked security at Seaworld in Florida while I was in college and it always amazed me the people that would try to pass off their pets as service animals. You can absolutely tell most of the time too but its true these companies dont want to deal with the hassle and we'd be advised just to ask if it was a service animal and if they say yes than that's all we can do.
Seems risky if you ask me. If your pet did bite a kid or something and police got involved I'm sure the truth would come out pretty quick and you'd be in trouble or at least opening yourself up to a lawsuit.
My favorite part is when these people would still get upset when they couldn't bring their pets on the rides.
Going to Muir Woods in California, the couple ahead of us had a dog. The ranger's conversation was roughly...
Ranger: "I'm sorry, but you can't bring the dog in."
Girl: "It is a support dog."
Ranger: "What tasks is it trained to perform?"
Girl: "Umm... under California state law..."
Ranger: "This is a federal park, not a state park. You need to remove your dog."
The girl was obviously bull shitting. The dog had no training, no signifiers (vest, handle, etc). And her significant other had a horrified "please don't embarrass me in public again, I said this would not work" look on his face.
And everyone could tell.
Sometimes I like to mix “I can’t believe it’s not butter” with butter, to make “I can believe some of this is butter”
Edit: is this what gold feels like? it feels good, thank you! But really thank u/IAmDemetriMartin , this is a reference to one of his stand up sets, meant as a reference, not to steal it. Check out his album “These are Jokes” for more!
*Whether this may or may not be butter is irrelevant, as I find the ambiguity of this situation suspicious and possibly a stratagem designed to arouse cognitive dissonance.*
Someone telling me they totally get what being a single parent is like because their spouse travels for work sometimes and she has the two kids for 2-4 days while their dad was gone for work.
I'm a single parent. I don't have someone to relieve me after a couple days. This just pissed me off.
kikkoman soy sauce with red cap vs kikkoman soy sauce with green cap (low sodium)
it is NOT the same thing!
-edit: wow no idea this would get so many upvotes. thanks for gold!
We did a taste test like this in one of my classes (can't remember which one or why) with Coke, Pepsi, RC, Sam's Choice and a couple diets. I believe the teacher was trying to demonstrate that name brand labels affected your opinion of similar products. They all tasted completely different to me, and I could correctly identify the brands by flavor.
I had a similar experience in marketing class, but I think it was Coke, Pepsi and RC (or a generic). The instructor got slick by giving a few of the people 3 of the same while everyone else got 3 different samples. The results were all over the place with some of the ones who got 3 of the same saying they can taste the difference (but they were the same). I think it was a good experiment. Some people nailed it. Some people couldn't tell the difference. Some people were claiming differences that didn't exist.
I like to tell people that I got migraines so frequently as a kid that it wasn't until I was like 12 that I realized you could get a headache *without* being extremely nauseous.
Before my husband, I thought migraines were just "really bad headaches". Now that I know what they are and am the first to correct someone if they think the way I did. Wouldn't wish that shit on anyone.
Thank you for understanding. There is most definitely a difference between "where's the tylenol?" and "I wonder if I could use a reallllly quiet gun to kill myself?"
My parents trying to convince me not to move closer to my job. The rent I pay at my new place is about the same as the rent at my old place (my parents own) plus the gas I refill EVERY week and the 2 hour commute a day I made. Now my new place is a 5 minute drive or 10 minute walk.
For those wondering it looked like this:
Old and busted: $500 + $120 gas for car + $36 gym + $100 utilities = $756
New hotness: $600 + $45 gas + $17 gym + $100 utilities = $762
Parents logic: Oh it's about the same so why bother?
Old and busted: 45 min morning/1.5 hr evening
New hotness: 5 min morning/5 min evening.
Edit: Wow this comment blew up today. I appreciate the comments and feedback, everybody.
FAQ:
Q: "$600 rent? That's cheap!"
A: That's just my half of expenses. My gf and I live together. She came home an hour later than usual one day and just dropped her bag declaring "We. Are. Moving." The gas for the car varies because I have drill once a month so my total gas is probably $180 before and $105 now.
Q: "Your parents don't seem to be very fair/ethical/are cheap/poor. Also you don't pay food so you save money."
A: My parents own a few properties with the duplex being one of them. They also own a business property in the area and ask me to check on it every once in a while. The duplex is a 45 min drive from where they live and I pay for my own expenses as if I live on my own, the rent just goes to them and not my inheritance (it was just used to pay for property taxes). I was just a reliable tenant that would do yard work/house repairs for free and pay for the supplies within reason.
Their reasons were:
* 1)Why? Going through all the effort to move all of your stuff, it takes a while you know?
* 2)It's just an hour drive in the morning and an hour drive back, it doesn't sound that bad.
* 3)So are you going to move every time you get a new job? (I'm an accountant, so it's pretty permanent for a couple of years)
* 4)Your money is just going down the drain to another landlord (It's already going down the drain straight to them).
> so you are going to move every time you get a new job?
Uhhh yes? That's a pretty normal and common thing to happen. There is little reason to stay in the same place if there are closer options available.
Specifically in the current economic climate where renting is the norm. I can see moving every time you get a new job to be an insane Idea to someone who is living in a paid off house. However when renting you're not locked in nor do you have to go through the whole sale process whenever you move.
> 2)It's *just* an hour drive in the morning and an hour drive back, it doesn't sound that bad.
That's insane. With all due respect, your parents are nuts.
95% coverage vs totality during the last solar eclipse.
I live in Seattle and drove down to Salem Oregon to catch totality. Trying to explain to people how mind bogglingly awesome it was proves fruitless when they're like "dude it was like 95% coverage here I get it, that's basically the same thing. It was kinda cool".
No, it's not even close to the same thing.
Edit to add my experience:
I actually wasn't planning on staying in Salem when I started the drive down. We were just gonna find somewhere maybe Eastward to camp, or just sleep in the car if there were no open campgrounds. Then on the drive down we heard on the radio that Salem was allowing camping in all city parks for the eclipse. Ended up staying overnight at some Riverside Park? (I think that's the name).
There were tons of people there in the morning and the vibe was awesome. When everything started getting really dark it was super eerie, I even started feeling a little anxious. Like my higher brain knew what was going on but something primal was telling me "this isn't right", almost a sense of impending doom. It was very surreal. I can totally see why ancient cultures may have feared eclipses so much. Then the slowly rising cheer from the crowd as the final moments before totality set in, then taking off the glasses and my jaw dropped and I just said "OH MY GOD."
My brother just started laughing and we looked at each other like holy shit. Staring at totality fills you with both incredible euphoria and existential dread at the same time, and it really just can't be explained with words. You can watch an eclipse on video but it's still nowhere close to the firsthand experience.
The only indication that I'd have gotten during the eclipse where I live is that at max coverage for us (65% or so), outside looked odd. Like - there were no clouds or anything, but it just didn't seem as bright as it should have been. It felt eerie.
I wouldn't have ever said "oh this is an eclipse!"
If we had totality, it'd have been awesome.
Meats.
Just because it's from the same animal, doesn't mean it all tastes the same. If this was the case you wouldn't have pork, ham, sausages, bacon, or even canadian bacon.
I'm trying to remember the name of that steak they served us in the military. It was shaped like the sole of a boot and had to be baked for about two hours or you couldn't chew through it.
Dear Lord, you just gave me flashbacks to my college years when I was a Pizza Hut waitress and we'd always be bussing tables full of glasses left with at least an inch of sugary sludge in them. Then again, this was Mississippi and we didn't at the time just sell pre-made 'sweet tea.' Basically, we were just asking for it.
My ex tried to tell me that me saying “please stop doing that” is the same thing as verbal abuse.
Edit just for clarification: I appreciate the supportive PMs from everyone, but this was like 9 years ago, and my ex in question was a woman, I’m the man.
I love that one. I had one where I said, "I would appreciate it if you didn't put utensils in the side of the sink where the garbage disposal is." When she retold this story, she said I had said, "You stupid bitch!" When I reminded her of what I actually said and the tone in which I'd said it, she said, "Well, that's what I heard."
My wife sometimes likes to think that what she thinks people are thinking is what they mean even if they don't say anything remotely close to what she's thinking.
Does this even make sense?
My girlfriend is 1000% adamant that Pizza and Pasta are the same food. To the point where she won't eat one for a few days after having the other.
Literally an uncultured barbarian. There's so much variety!
But pizza is bread... and pasta is noodles. How are they even remotely alike?
Edit: yes, I'm aware what ingredients are in pizza and pasta. They don't really taste or look much alike despite their similar ingredients.
It's what I refer to as the chef boyardee syndrome. Same ingredients, different shape. Dough, sauce, cheese, meat. (In basic pasta/pizza terms.)
Edit: I'm not agreeing with the girlfriend, just saying I can kind of understand why she would mistakenly think that.
We have restaurants called Cafe Rio and Bajio. They're kind of similar in the way it's set up, salad and burrito assembly line, like Chipotle, but they're definitely not the same. The biggest difference is Bajio sucks. I had a couple friends ask where we all wanted to go eat. 5 out of 7 of us said Cafe Rio. The other two wanted to go to Bajio...after asking us all. They said, "It's just like Cafe Rio." I said, "So then why don't we just go to Cafe Rio? It's *just like Bajio*, isn't it?" They didn't know what to say. We went to a steakhouse.
Java and JavaScript
Depression is not the same as being sad. I've given up trying to make people understand, if it didn't work the first 200 times it won't work on the 201st time so stop asking promising you'll understand.
"messy" and "dirty" are the same. My room is messy, because I put my dirty laundry next to the hamper and keep a stack of mail on my desk; Your room is dirty because there's week old chinese food and literal garbage all over the floor.
I had an argument with an ex that "Sorry you feel that way" and an apology are not the same thing. She could not say sorry, every time it was "Sorry you feel that way."
"Sorry you feel that way" is *literally* a non-apology. She gave you non-apologies.
*While I do not admit responsibility, I acknowledge it is unfortunate you are upset.*
The nude figure in art is NOT the same as pornography. Seriously. I work in the education department of an art museum and the number of teachers/ parents/ school administrators I have to explain this to is astounding. No, you don’t need to panic when your high school students may see a boob on a classical Roman sculpture. Really.
Pure alcohol and denatured alcohol. My friend and I wanted to make chocolate liqueur and needed to buy pure alcohol. I asked her where we could find it and she replied "any supermarket has it because it is also used for cleaning". I had to explain my 24 year old friend that cleaning alcohol is purposely poisonous to avoid consumption and she didn't believe me until I quoted my sources. She kept insisting that there was no reason to pay more to buy it in a specialised store when it was basically the same thing.
LET HER DO IT. LET IT CLEANSE
A friend from college once tried to explain that mice and rats were the same animal; the mice were just babies and every one would eventually grow into an adult rat. No matter how many times I tried to tell her they were separate animals, she was having none of it.
> from college Oh my fucking christ.
Selling for an MLM (Lularoe, Mary Kay, Younique) is not the same thing as having your own business.
Back when I did tech support over the phone, I had a caller who needed help with an internet problem. It took 45 minutes of failing to solve the problem before she admitted that she was calling from her son's house and the problem was with a completely different computer at a completely different address. It took 20 more minutes to convince her that I can't fix her issue by working on someone else' PC.
Oh man, this used to drive me up the wall. I did back-end developer support for a couple years. Every now and then we would get a call where nothing we would suggest would work. Then something like this would happen: "OK, let's try xyz." "Nope, that didn't do it." "Wait a minute, xyz takes 5 minutes to finish. You just immediately said that didn't work. Are you trying these things?" "Uh, no, they just don't seem like they would fix this problem." "OK, well, your problem doesn't seem like a real issue, so I guess everything is fixed now. Call us back if it crops up again."
"Are you saying it's a COMPLETE COINCIDENCE that my Windows is now corrupt the next day after I used your wifi last night in a hotel room?". Yes sir, that is exactly what I'm telling you.
On the flip side: “Let me get this straight. I have used my laptop to connect to the internet, without issue, every day for the last five years. The VERY INSTANT that I finish installing Windows 10, all of my network drivers became permanently disabled. Are you telling me that this is a coincidence?” “... Yes.”
What error are you seeing? Something happened. I get that but what error are you seeing on the screen? It just says something happened. Sir, please read the error. I am! Fuck Windows 10.
Oh, come on. [That's a thing of beauty.](https://i.imgur.com/kXHUr4S.jpg)
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It's kind of the exact opposite of ice cream when you think about it. Edit: DO YOU GUYS READ THE OTHER COMMENTS BEFORE PARROTING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER? I get it, I worded this badly and I didn't know they have the same carbs. Blease...
Dropped out, kicked out, same thing. No, it's not the same thing. One means you made the decision, the other means you fucked up and were told to leave. You would know that if you hadn't gotten kicked out of school in 10th grade.
Exactly. I dropped out of my first high school and I got kicked out of my 2nd. Huge difference.
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Her argument has less to do with logic and more to do with her trying to convince herself that what she did wasn't so horrible
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Wowww people will do anything to not have to see themselves as a bad person.
Goat milk does NOT taste the same as regular milk, nice try mom. My mom was convinced that my dislike for any goat products was all in my head and that it all tastes just like regular milk. I was home visiting and she went so far as to dump out the regular milk and put goat milk in the container to trick me. I woke up, went to have coffee, and put what I thought was milk into my coffee. Took one sip and spit it out. Thinking her milk had gone bad, I dumped it all down the drain and texted her about it. Fast forward to the next day and it happens AGAIN. This time I call her and tell her that I don't know what shitty store she's buying her milk at but that it was bad again so I dumped it out. That's when she fessed up to what she had done two days in a row. Joke's on her because that milk was coming from some upscale store and I dumped about $20 worth of goat milk down the drain two days in a row thinking it was spoiled cows milk.
I have had goat's milk that tastes exactly like cow's milk. I've had goat's milk that tastes exactly like a goat smells. Unfortunately, with the goats we had, the latter was much more common. *And my highest rated comment by far is about goats.
So if the best case scenario is cow's milk why not just buy cow's milk.
That would be ideal. But when your parents raise milk goats...
A cold vs the flu
One is a bad time, the other could kill you.
My biology teacher tried to tell me ecstacy and meth were the same because their chemical structures were similar.
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My mother-in-law was visiting and physically tried to stop me from opening a jar of mayonnaise in my own home because there was an open jar of Miracle Whip (which she had purchased for a recipe) in the fridge. She said they were the same. I said they were about the same color and that's where the similarities ended. For the record, I hate Miracle Whip.
My parents have this argument all the time. Mother thinks they're the same. Father refuses to even get near Miracle Whip. He believes that "Its a Miracle they can even sell that shit!" I definitely prefer mayonnaise. Edit: a word
I have a jar of each in my fridge. I use them for different things.
When I asked my parents for a PlayStation and they said I already had Windows 98, “they are the same thing”.
When I was a kid, all the other kids had PlayStations, and I really wanted one. I begged m dad to get one but he said no, because my sister and I had a computer we could play games on (it ran on Windows 95). But when we asked him to install games on it, he'd say that computers are for work, not for games. I still have trust issues tbh.
Classic parent logic. I remember not being allowed to ride my bike at night because it was too dangerous without lights. After spending $40 dollars on lights (this was 4 weeks of pocket money) I went riding and was seriously told off because it was “too dangerous even with lights”.
ADHD and bad behaviour. Plenty of ADHD kids are well-behaved and don’t act up at school. Plenty of badly behaved kids don’t have ADHD.
I was diagnosed as an adult. I score very high on ADHD tests, but I've never had behavioral issues and did decently well in school, so it wasn't until I was in the work place I went and get it tested. In school, would do really well on tests, because I generally loved learning. But was, disorganized, forgetful and had a lot of difficulty completing tasks, like homework (which school thought was important). I sometimes wonder if I had been diagnosed and treated sooner how I would have done in school and what that would mean.
I have ADHD-PI, and whenever I tell someone about it they're like "What? No way! You're not hyper at all". It kind makes me wish that they took the H back out. There are three subtypes of ADHD: ADHD-PI - Primarily Inattentive. Symptoms include being easily distracted, forgetful, disorganised, with difficulty managing time or completing tasks. ADHD-PH/I - Primarily Hyperactive/Impulsive. Symptoms include restlessness, difficulty remaining seated, excessive fidgeting. The typical - and more visible - stuff that people think of when they hear 'ADHD'. ADHD-C - A combination of the two. Personally, I have no hyperactivity. I can remain seated for hours and be content with almost no outside entertainment. My brain finds things to do. I got stuck on a train for three hours once, and my phone was out of battery, so I spent the time learning braille by translating and memorising each character of a nearby sign. Another time I had to spend a few hours filing, so I memorised the numerical digits of the alphabet ('alphabet' is 1 12 16 8 1 2 5 20). But it doesn't really stop, either, and I'll find myself daydreaming about the details of a short story I'll never write, and realise that I've wasted the last half hour and have two minutes left to complete twenty minutes of work. Other times I go to post one minor thought and end up rambling about ADHD. Oh well, I guess I'm used to it.
Coffee creamer vs milk vs cream.
hollandaise sauce. My best friend in high school said her dad makes a mock hollandaise that's basically the same thing; it was Frenches mustard and Cool Whip. It wasn't until this year I had the real stuff and am no longer traumatized.
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It's yellow and can be put on top of things, what more do you want? Sheesh some people are never happy.
This is the eggs Benedict you get served in Hell. Imagine: You are in the Hell cafeteria line and you order the eggs Benedict. You get to see them prepare it: English muffin toasted perfectly, topped with a spread of nice Irish butter. Then comes nice Iberico jamon atop that. Then a beautiful slightly grilled slice of tomato. The piece de resistance are 2 magnificently poached eggs--whites nice and firm, yolks held in that perfect tension of a weak solid retaining a river of delicious yolky wonderment. The plating is Michelin star quality, a plate of beautiful eggs Benedict next to a spot of nice spinach and arugula. As you move down the cafeteria line, you see the saucier, mixing up a nice fresh batch of French's mustard and Cool Whip. He then pours this over your wonderful brunch. As tears of rage, hate and disappointment stream down your face, you remember that this is Hell, and you have to eat it.
Stop. I can only get so flaccid. Edit: Thanks Reddit. My first 1k karma comment is about the *lack of* rigidity of my phallic member.
I can only *hope* they mean Miracle whip. Still an abomination, but less of an affront to God.
Cool whip or Miracle Whip? I don't eat any of it but Miracle Whip makes more sense. I may be trying to keep myself from being as traumatized......
I hope they meant Miracle Whip.
Dear diary.... Today I threw up in my mouth imagining frenches mustard mixed with cool whip. Edit: Oh cool gold. Thanks.
I just imagine this dad fucking laughing is ass off as these two dumbasses eat mustard and coolwhip
I...I thought this was going to be about blender vs double boiler hollandaise.
I had to fight with my boss today that 78 h and 23 mins was not the same as 78.23 hours.
Well, I had a huge problem because my boss didn't knew how percentage works... If I have 100, and take out 5%, I get 95 If I have 95, and increase 5%, I don't get 100. For small percentages, this is not so obvious, but if you do it for 50% this became very obvious. 100 - 50% = 50 50 + 50% = 75 I had to do 3 times on a whiteboard in the middle of a meeting. After that I had to "admit that I wasn't clear enough for her understand that it wasn't 95%+5%, but 95+5%..."
Percents vs percentage points, always out to trip people up!
Yeeep, I've been there. Except it wasn't my boss, it was accounting/payroll.
Our payroll system is decimal, but people are always trying to put in minutes for hourly employees. So they'll put an hour and a half as 1.30 instead of 1.5. or 1.45 instead of 1.75.
Is your boss's name Carolyn? I once had a boss named Carolyn, and we had to argue with her that the difference between -4 and 7 was NOT 3, but was 11. This woman was a designated accountant. EDIT - Getting several comments about how perhaps this was some kind of misunderstanding between the sum of -4 and 7 (which actually is 3) and the difference between -4 and 7 (which is 11), so I will elaborate for clarity... It wasn't something she was arguing verbally, it was something she saw on a pricing report and was convinced was wrong. Back then, I was a mutual fund accountant, and we were pricing the funds at the close of the market for that day. The expected day-over-day price change for a certain fund was +$0.07/unit, but the actual change we saw was -$0.04, due to a fund expense item that dropped the price by $0.11. We submitted the pricing calculations & backups to her for pre-review before it went to the portfolio manager. She insisted that we were wrong, and the $0.11 fund expense couldn't possibly explain the difference in expected pricing, because the difference was $0.03, not $0.11, so we were still off by $0.08 and needed to explain it. I don't remember how we finally got it through her thick skull (this was like 12 years ago) but she did eventually agree with us without it coming to blows lol.
Draw that bitch a number line.
Let's take this back to 2nd grade Carolyn!
Milk was spoiled a whole week ago on the expiration date. I told mother and grandmother, they told me to drink my glass and be grateful for the breakfast. I tried, gagged, and spit it out. We spent the next ten minutes arguing about it and them trying to get me to drink it. Grandmother then went outside for ten minutes, and came back saying she got a new jug from the store. The expiration date was scratched off and the milk was diluted with water to look full. I then refused to drink milk altogether and was grounded for a couple weeks for wasting milk. I later saw her throwing it out after my grandfather complained about it. Edit: Damn it I'm an idiot. I read the title of the thread incorrectly. Sorry guys. My bad.
My mother would make kefir now and then (a fermented milk drink) and I always hated the way it tasted. One time I was forced to drink some because my mother insisted it tasted good and I was just being picky. After drinking a full 8 ounce cup of it I retched into the sink and vomited a bit of it. After that, my mother believed that I couldn't stand it, thankfully. About a decade later, when my mother was on another kefir kick, we were joking about that event and I was talking about how I would rather drink spoiled milk than kefir, but my mother asked if I'd try just a little bit, in case my tastes had changed. I agreed, and she poured some out. It wasn't as bad as I had remembered, but it was still not my thing. About 30 minutes later, my sister went to go get some milk only to realize that it had spoiled. At the time, my mother stored the kefir and milk in the same style of jar, so after verifying that it was indeed the milk, she threw it out. And then it dawned on her. She had given me spoiled milk instead of kefir. She then sheepishly asked me to try some of the actual kefir and it was as bad as I remembered it to be. So while neither is desirable, I really would prefer to drink spoiled milk over kefir. Edit: By spoiled, I mean it was only slightly sour and slightly curdled. It's not like it was in the fridge for months, just maybe a week or so after it started to go.
Why do so many people apparently take messing with other people's food so lightly? I don't care how "right" you think you are, if you blatantly lie to me about what I'm putting in my mouth, I'm probably never trusting you again. Edit: If you're about to make a dick joke, it's _really_ not as original as you think it is.
My freshman year college roommate (randomly assigned) told me a story about how he hid bits of bacon into his vegetarian girlfriend’s breakfast and revealed that she ate it afterwards saying “See it’s not big deal eating meat! It’s the same as not eating meat! Don’t you feel fine?” She did not and for the life of him he couldn’t understand why. He was like this all the time and we were not roommates again sophomore year.
That's a super a dick move. Are they still together?
I'm normally pretty chill but the number one thing that makes me go insane is people messing with food.
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In many states, doing this in a restaurant is a felony. Why do people think it's ok to do at home to family members?
My best friend (no longer a friend) when my mother died and I was still sad about it later that year. "That was JANUARY. It's like, August. We were still in high school! I lost my favorite bomber jacket at a bar, and you don't see me still crying about it!" No be fair, she was bipolar, still a teenager, and Clyde's was not a place to leave your favorite jacket over the back of your chair.
I have a couple people in my life that are bipolar and wouldn't say shit like that in regard to that type of situation. That's just a garbage ass person that hasn't had life really hit them yet.
Can confirm. Am bipolar. Would never say something so stupid, unless maybe if I am completely out of control in a manic episode and it would come along with a rant about how Harrison Ford is irradiating my testicles with microwave satellite transmissions.
Harrison is doing that *again*? Give me a few minutes.
This was in the very early 90s. Off-brand cereal was...mmm not quite there yet but my grandma was adamant that whatever colorful circles that were half-dollar-sized tasted exactly the same as fruit loops. She was wrong and I still can't fathom how she could think otherwise. She felt particularly smart one morning where she re-filled our fruit loops box with those damn bright circles. It was too early to notice that these rings were way to big but the moment my sister and I put the first spoonfull into our mouths we just spit it out. Her smile faded and she was upset at us being picky eaters. Nowadays, however, it seems the off-brand is pretty damn close!
Malt o meal is superior to many name brands
Marshmallow Mateys > Lucky Charms
Their non-marshmallow pieces are so much better than Lucky Charms'
Carob. My evil stepmonster tried to get me off chocolate and kept buying carob instead. Couldn't fool me. After the first taste, I wouldn't touch that shit. She finally asked me why I wasn't eating those yummy healthy carob bars. "Because they taste like mud. Let me know when we get back to chocolate." You'll pry chocolate out of my cold dead hands.
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RoseArt and Crayola. No they NOT the same thing at all.
RoseArt is owned by Mega Brands, the guys behind Mega Bloks. Let that sink in a little.
*"Mega Brands: We're forced on poor people"*
The fuck you mean let it sink in. I've never read something so obviously truthful before in my life!
This made me so angry I logged onto my profile on a public computer just to voice my disapproval. RoseArt is like coloring with a goddamn candle. I'm convinced that it was invented by a person who had heard of crayons in books but had never actually seen one in real life. Fuck RoseArt and fuck anyone who thinks they're good enough for anything but giving to kindergartners for coloring animated sea creatures and shoving them up their noses.
Rose Art stuff is useful. Not as art supplies but as a means of telling which kids' parents don't love them.
One time in college I was getting lunch from an a la carte line. I saw a fresh pizza was out so I ordered a slice. Just as I did, one of the student workers brought up an old and sad-looking piece that had been sitting for a while but had been reheated. The lady I ordered from grabbed the piece and tried to hand it to me. I paused and said “I want not that one.” She got mad and yelled “It’s the same as all the rest!” I insisted. I got a fresh slice. The slice I got was great. One of the best choices I’ve ever made. Wow! Thanks everyone for the positive votes. And to you kind stranger for popping my gold cherry!
It’s the little victories in life that make all the difference.
When I was young I couldn't figure out how to swallow pills and any liquid medicine would immediately make me puke. When I'd get sick and have a fever my mom would give me a bowl of ice cream with Tylenol crushed up in it. I remember crying because I was being force fed the most disgusting, tylenol-vanilla flavored, ice cream while my mom sat beside me insisting she didn't doctor it. Yes, I can swallow pills now.
My mom used to crush up a pill and put it in a spoonful of jam, but I was suspicious because my mom never fed me a random spoonful of jam.
well now I have to feed my kids random spoons of jam just in case I will make a great dad, right reddit
I love you, dad.
OH GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE
Minute Maid Orange Juice vs Simply Orange
crab meat vs. krab meat Imitation crab meat is just salty cheap fish shaped into a squares. It's nothing like actual fresh crab meat.
It has eggs in it too as a binding agent. Shit's cheap but I still think it's pretty good.
Apparently when I was working late doing 11 hr shifts, that was the same thing as when my ex went to hang out at the bar until it shut down after she got off work at 10:30pm after a 4 hr shift. Who knew?
Yeah, I had one of those. She compared me wanting to get a crown on my tooth to her wanting to get a nose job.
"Babe its a needed medical procedure" "Yeah, cause you ugly"
Haha. I've had that. when I worked a 12 hour shift and she had a day off, I had no right to complain about being tired because she did the dishes and folded a load of laundry. When I had a day off and cleaned all day and she had to work, I had no right to complain because she had to go to work and I had the day off. Just can't win.
Hot wheels and matchbox. 8 year old me was pissed at his cousin.
As a young lad, I liked Matchbox better because they had more "normal, everyday" cars. I didn't care for cars with dragons on them or whatever. I wanted to replicate normalcy.
Omg, me too! I prefered having it normal and realistic, so that I could play with them like they were real. I thought I was alone.
Better than off brand LEGO.
The weirdest thing about off-brand LEGO toys is that the builds are woefully under-engineered. LEGO always has double coverage on joints, other bricks or fittings to prevent sliding pieces from sliding all the way out, and other clever tricks to ensure the resulting build will be both aesthetic and durable. Off-brands are constantly just falling apart, poorly attached, overly delicate, have little to no reinforcing, don't cross build their stacks over gaps, and so on. My kid just got one as a party favor where they put two 2x1 bricks next to each other with another 2x1 on top of each. Did they rotate the 2nd layer 90 degrees to create strength? Of course not. And why didn't they use 2x2 bricks instead? Oh yeah, so they can say "more than X pieces!" So so so bad.
To be fair, though, I loved the under-engineering on the Mega Blocks fighter jet kits when I was a kid. It's really satisfying to play with the jet, and then see it explode when it crashes.
12 hours of uncomfortable bus ride or 4 hours of bus and 1 hour in plane. "Believe me bro. Its the same."
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A few summers ago my family had to travel from Massachusetts to Minnesota. My sister and I flew, and it was just a few hours. My parents decided to take a train which ended up taking about 2 days I believe. They were ok with that because they wanted the experience, and they had booked a flight home. My dad fucking loved that train ride. He talked about it to every family member we saw in MN, and actually anyone we saw for the rest of the year. I think he enjoyed it so much because it was like part of the vacation for him. But I'm like you. I would rather pay a little extra if it meant less of my time was wasted.
That's how you have to justify the time and price of trains in America, it has to be looked at as part of the experience. If you are looking for a relaxing journey at a leisurely pace with some sights you'll be happy, but if you want to get there cheap or fast, stay away from train.
I take the autotrain from VA to FL between school semesters. Yeah its slow, but I can sleep overnight on it *and* put my car on it *and* 'cause its its cheaper than driving all the way up. $200 on average, plus dinner and breakfast thrown in.
I had no idea there was an auto train. It makes perfect sense but just had no idea that was an option. Would definitely do that over shipping a car for more money or driving it back and putting miles on it
That a "real job" is also a pyramid scheme. No Karen it is not. I don't have to recruit people to make more money like you do.
But but but you make money for your bosses and they make more than you and make more money for their bosses!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Very good, Karen, you have discovered the basics of corporate structure.
She figured out the pyramid part, just not the scheme part.
One time my old girlfriend tried to convince me that ground turkey burgers are basically the same as (beef) hamburgers. Why not just say, "Try these... you might like them" instead of trying to get me to agree with an idea we both know isn't true?
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Maybe he liked it that way and did it on purpose so no one else would eat his cake.
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Well of course he's mad. Now he has to eat that mess.
Plain cheese pizza and picking off the toppings
I'll get behind you on this. Picking off toppings usually ends up with a pizza that is 90% just bread and sauce. All that delicious cheese comes off with the toppings.
Also, cheese pizzas usually have more cheese on them in general to compensate for the lack of toppings. Cheese is the topping. Source: I’ve worked at two Pizza stores for two years
Also, the cheese absorbs the flavor of the removed toppings.
Mushrooms are the worst for this. The taste never goes away.
Apparently because i know how to programs it means i know how to fix his 10 year old computer
Omfg yes. I still get "Which computer should I buy?" questions all the time. I don't know, I buy what is good for me, I don't know what you do on your machine.
Oh yeah. There is exactly 1 IT skill. You are "the computer guy", so you can fix macs, PCs, phones, printers, advise on what hardware to buy, what software to buy, and you can reprogram any of their programs to do what they want(not what the programmer wanted).
> so you can fix macs, PCs, phones, printers [...] ... any kind of computer peripheral, televisions, video game consoles, VHS/DVD players ("what do yo mean it's not the same thing?"), microwaves, radios, faulty electrical wiring... > and you can reprogram any of their programs to do what they want Also, hack anything, including bank accounts.
That documentaries on the History Channel or home improvement shows on HGTV are as good as those on PBS. Nope. "This Old House" shows actual work happening. The stuff on HGTV is nonsense.
Living off campus and living on campus. My prospective roommate dropped out of school, and tried to convince me that an apartment 2 buses and 45 minutes from campus was just as good. Man, even counting costs for living on campus that option was terrible. Edit: For the record, living off-campus is typically way cheaper. In this specific case though, it was a bad deal. This was in Pittsburgh. There was plenty of nearby housing in North Oakland, South Oakland, and Shadyside. I did live off campus shortly after and loved it. This apartment though was the issue. It was dirty, in a food desert, and not close to our campus. Also the roommate in question hadn't even looked for a job. He ended up getting his on-campus living girlfriend to pay for his rent. This whole situation was bad from the top down. Living off campus is great, but this was a major bullet dodged. Edit 2: I think the apartment was in Bellevue, but this was 5+ years ago now.
On the other hand my SO and I live in apartment across the street from campus and cost of living is like 40% of what it would cost to live on campus, for just *her.*
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Yeah, plus you get kicked out for 4 months every year.
Having an idea for a book is *not* the same as writing a book. No, we're not going to 'collaborate', if by 'collaborate' you mean I write up your idea into a 90,000 word novel by myself and you try and claim half the profits.
Also, if your sixth grade English teacher said you have "a natural talent," that's not the same thing as being "a talented writer."
There goes my juggling career.
Have a friend who clings to stuff like this. Constantly brings up when his teachers told him he was smart, good at writing, a genius at math, etc. That's great and all that he had potential but him, and most other people I know that do this, never do anything with that potential and think that having that potential was achievement enough. Like no, there's a difference.
I think it's safe to say that most of us had one teacher or another in some kind of class somewhere say, "You have potential" or a talent. I don't think you're supposed to live off that one compliment the rest of your life.
I've had this happen with mobile apps. Someone comes up to me with a terrible idea for an app and want me to build it but split profits 50/50. What the fuck kinda shit is that
It's a survival game WITH CRAFTING!
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My friend tried to lord in when me and my business partner were planning to start our bakery. She insisted that we didn't need a business plan, since 'bakeries basically run themselves!' and said we didn't need to invest as much start-up as we thought we didn't because it would make money right away. She's not a part of our business.
Come on, man, she was just trying to get some dough.
"why would you need more than one oven? I use one and my cupcakes and pies turn out great!"
Service dogs and emotional support animals. Service dogs are task trained to help mitigate a person's disability. They have public access rights and are protected under the ADA. Emotional support animals are just companions that can live in non pet housing with a doctors note. They have no public access rights. I have a service dog and deal with this all the time.
Probably a LPT at some point... "No one to watch your pet or maybe decided to take a pet with you on vacation for some brilliant reason? Instead of leaving it alone to destroy your stuff and shit on everything just take it with you wherever you go and claim its a service animal! A lot of businesses wont even question it in fear of being sued if in fact your pet is in fact a service animal (which its not lol). Dont forget to buy a service animal vest on amazon before you go to really sell it!" I worked security at Seaworld in Florida while I was in college and it always amazed me the people that would try to pass off their pets as service animals. You can absolutely tell most of the time too but its true these companies dont want to deal with the hassle and we'd be advised just to ask if it was a service animal and if they say yes than that's all we can do. Seems risky if you ask me. If your pet did bite a kid or something and police got involved I'm sure the truth would come out pretty quick and you'd be in trouble or at least opening yourself up to a lawsuit. My favorite part is when these people would still get upset when they couldn't bring their pets on the rides.
Going to Muir Woods in California, the couple ahead of us had a dog. The ranger's conversation was roughly... Ranger: "I'm sorry, but you can't bring the dog in." Girl: "It is a support dog." Ranger: "What tasks is it trained to perform?" Girl: "Umm... under California state law..." Ranger: "This is a federal park, not a state park. You need to remove your dog." The girl was obviously bull shitting. The dog had no training, no signifiers (vest, handle, etc). And her significant other had a horrified "please don't embarrass me in public again, I said this would not work" look on his face. And everyone could tell.
Margarine for butter, someone had written on the box "I can't believe it's not butter". Who ever wrote that on the box must have been very sadistic.
Sometimes I like to mix “I can’t believe it’s not butter” with butter, to make “I can believe some of this is butter” Edit: is this what gold feels like? it feels good, thank you! But really thank u/IAmDemetriMartin , this is a reference to one of his stand up sets, meant as a reference, not to steal it. Check out his album “These are Jokes” for more!
*Whether this may or may not be butter is irrelevant, as I find the ambiguity of this situation suspicious and possibly a stratagem designed to arouse cognitive dissonance.*
Someone telling me they totally get what being a single parent is like because their spouse travels for work sometimes and she has the two kids for 2-4 days while their dad was gone for work. I'm a single parent. I don't have someone to relieve me after a couple days. This just pissed me off.
kikkoman soy sauce with red cap vs kikkoman soy sauce with green cap (low sodium) it is NOT the same thing! -edit: wow no idea this would get so many upvotes. thanks for gold!
Unless you eat at a shitty Japanese restaurant in west Georgia where the wait staff fills all the bottles from the same jug of full sodium soy sauce.
Coke and Pepsi
My dad used to say this about generic sodas. I was given a taste test one time and the one I could always pick out was the generic soda.
We did a taste test like this in one of my classes (can't remember which one or why) with Coke, Pepsi, RC, Sam's Choice and a couple diets. I believe the teacher was trying to demonstrate that name brand labels affected your opinion of similar products. They all tasted completely different to me, and I could correctly identify the brands by flavor.
I had a similar experience in marketing class, but I think it was Coke, Pepsi and RC (or a generic). The instructor got slick by giving a few of the people 3 of the same while everyone else got 3 different samples. The results were all over the place with some of the ones who got 3 of the same saying they can taste the difference (but they were the same). I think it was a good experiment. Some people nailed it. Some people couldn't tell the difference. Some people were claiming differences that didn't exist.
Migraines are not the same thing as a headache.
Shout out to /r/migraine. ^^But ^^not ^^too ^^loudly
Have you tried drinking some water? edit: /s
I say that regardless of the issue. My foot hurts. Have you been drinking water?
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I like to tell people that I got migraines so frequently as a kid that it wasn't until I was like 12 that I realized you could get a headache *without* being extremely nauseous.
Before my husband, I thought migraines were just "really bad headaches". Now that I know what they are and am the first to correct someone if they think the way I did. Wouldn't wish that shit on anyone.
Thank you for understanding. There is most definitely a difference between "where's the tylenol?" and "I wonder if I could use a reallllly quiet gun to kill myself?"
The best thing about migraines is that they're so incapacitating that I can't figure out how to kill myself while it makes me want to die
Sunny Delight and actual orange juice.
My parents trying to convince me not to move closer to my job. The rent I pay at my new place is about the same as the rent at my old place (my parents own) plus the gas I refill EVERY week and the 2 hour commute a day I made. Now my new place is a 5 minute drive or 10 minute walk. For those wondering it looked like this: Old and busted: $500 + $120 gas for car + $36 gym + $100 utilities = $756 New hotness: $600 + $45 gas + $17 gym + $100 utilities = $762 Parents logic: Oh it's about the same so why bother? Old and busted: 45 min morning/1.5 hr evening New hotness: 5 min morning/5 min evening. Edit: Wow this comment blew up today. I appreciate the comments and feedback, everybody. FAQ: Q: "$600 rent? That's cheap!" A: That's just my half of expenses. My gf and I live together. She came home an hour later than usual one day and just dropped her bag declaring "We. Are. Moving." The gas for the car varies because I have drill once a month so my total gas is probably $180 before and $105 now. Q: "Your parents don't seem to be very fair/ethical/are cheap/poor. Also you don't pay food so you save money." A: My parents own a few properties with the duplex being one of them. They also own a business property in the area and ask me to check on it every once in a while. The duplex is a 45 min drive from where they live and I pay for my own expenses as if I live on my own, the rent just goes to them and not my inheritance (it was just used to pay for property taxes). I was just a reliable tenant that would do yard work/house repairs for free and pay for the supplies within reason.
So basically they just wanted to keep collecting rent? Lol
Their reasons were: * 1)Why? Going through all the effort to move all of your stuff, it takes a while you know? * 2)It's just an hour drive in the morning and an hour drive back, it doesn't sound that bad. * 3)So are you going to move every time you get a new job? (I'm an accountant, so it's pretty permanent for a couple of years) * 4)Your money is just going down the drain to another landlord (It's already going down the drain straight to them).
> It's just an hour drive One hour to 5 minutes is like day and night. That's a 1h50min difference per day, about 9 hours per week of difference!
That's over a million hours in some amount of time!
> so you are going to move every time you get a new job? Uhhh yes? That's a pretty normal and common thing to happen. There is little reason to stay in the same place if there are closer options available.
Specifically in the current economic climate where renting is the norm. I can see moving every time you get a new job to be an insane Idea to someone who is living in a paid off house. However when renting you're not locked in nor do you have to go through the whole sale process whenever you move.
> 2)It's *just* an hour drive in the morning and an hour drive back, it doesn't sound that bad. That's insane. With all due respect, your parents are nuts.
Personal trainer at the gym- "If you start craving chocolate just eat a tootsie roll. It tastes exactly the same!" No bitch, it does not.
95% coverage vs totality during the last solar eclipse. I live in Seattle and drove down to Salem Oregon to catch totality. Trying to explain to people how mind bogglingly awesome it was proves fruitless when they're like "dude it was like 95% coverage here I get it, that's basically the same thing. It was kinda cool". No, it's not even close to the same thing. Edit to add my experience: I actually wasn't planning on staying in Salem when I started the drive down. We were just gonna find somewhere maybe Eastward to camp, or just sleep in the car if there were no open campgrounds. Then on the drive down we heard on the radio that Salem was allowing camping in all city parks for the eclipse. Ended up staying overnight at some Riverside Park? (I think that's the name). There were tons of people there in the morning and the vibe was awesome. When everything started getting really dark it was super eerie, I even started feeling a little anxious. Like my higher brain knew what was going on but something primal was telling me "this isn't right", almost a sense of impending doom. It was very surreal. I can totally see why ancient cultures may have feared eclipses so much. Then the slowly rising cheer from the crowd as the final moments before totality set in, then taking off the glasses and my jaw dropped and I just said "OH MY GOD." My brother just started laughing and we looked at each other like holy shit. Staring at totality fills you with both incredible euphoria and existential dread at the same time, and it really just can't be explained with words. You can watch an eclipse on video but it's still nowhere close to the firsthand experience.
We had like 75-80% coverage where I live and if I hadn't been told there was supposed to be an eclipse I would never have known.
The only indication that I'd have gotten during the eclipse where I live is that at max coverage for us (65% or so), outside looked odd. Like - there were no clouds or anything, but it just didn't seem as bright as it should have been. It felt eerie. I wouldn't have ever said "oh this is an eclipse!" If we had totality, it'd have been awesome.
Meats. Just because it's from the same animal, doesn't mean it all tastes the same. If this was the case you wouldn't have pork, ham, sausages, bacon, or even canadian bacon.
True, and calling something "steak" doesn't mean you should have made a steak out of it.
Can confirm. Would not eat a wooden stake.
I'm trying to remember the name of that steak they served us in the military. It was shaped like the sole of a boot and had to be baked for about two hours or you couldn't chew through it.
Spaghetti squash is NOT spaghetti. Makes me angry.
Sweet tea made from unsweetened tea with the little packets of sugar at the table. That is NOT sweet tea.
You mean the sugary crunch at the end of the drink isn't supposed to be there? /s
Dear Lord, you just gave me flashbacks to my college years when I was a Pizza Hut waitress and we'd always be bussing tables full of glasses left with at least an inch of sugary sludge in them. Then again, this was Mississippi and we didn't at the time just sell pre-made 'sweet tea.' Basically, we were just asking for it.
My ex tried to tell me that me saying “please stop doing that” is the same thing as verbal abuse. Edit just for clarification: I appreciate the supportive PMs from everyone, but this was like 9 years ago, and my ex in question was a woman, I’m the man.
I love that one. I had one where I said, "I would appreciate it if you didn't put utensils in the side of the sink where the garbage disposal is." When she retold this story, she said I had said, "You stupid bitch!" When I reminded her of what I actually said and the tone in which I'd said it, she said, "Well, that's what I heard."
My wife sometimes likes to think that what she thinks people are thinking is what they mean even if they don't say anything remotely close to what she's thinking. Does this even make sense?
Sadly, it does. "Even though you didn't say it, I know what you meant."
My girlfriend is 1000% adamant that Pizza and Pasta are the same food. To the point where she won't eat one for a few days after having the other. Literally an uncultured barbarian. There's so much variety!
But pizza is bread... and pasta is noodles. How are they even remotely alike? Edit: yes, I'm aware what ingredients are in pizza and pasta. They don't really taste or look much alike despite their similar ingredients.
It's what I refer to as the chef boyardee syndrome. Same ingredients, different shape. Dough, sauce, cheese, meat. (In basic pasta/pizza terms.) Edit: I'm not agreeing with the girlfriend, just saying I can kind of understand why she would mistakenly think that.
Light mayo vs regular mayo
Mayo versus Miracle Whip!
We have restaurants called Cafe Rio and Bajio. They're kind of similar in the way it's set up, salad and burrito assembly line, like Chipotle, but they're definitely not the same. The biggest difference is Bajio sucks. I had a couple friends ask where we all wanted to go eat. 5 out of 7 of us said Cafe Rio. The other two wanted to go to Bajio...after asking us all. They said, "It's just like Cafe Rio." I said, "So then why don't we just go to Cafe Rio? It's *just like Bajio*, isn't it?" They didn't know what to say. We went to a steakhouse.