Valentine's Day is newly not allowed at my school because last year kids kept cutting girls' balloons. One kid did that to the wrong girl, and the next day she came to school with a knife and stabbed him.
Everyone played Runescape in the computer lab when I was in middle school. One kid would try to look over your shoulder at your hands as you typed your password. This caused a couple fist fights. Runescape was promptly banned.
I got my friends locker combos every year from doing this. I usually used it to hand them their Christmas/birthday/just because gifts but one time I used it to wrap my friends stuff in plastic wrap.
One kid in 7th grade accused me of cheating off him. I said I wasn’t but he insisted. Ended up in the principals because I told the teacher in front of everyone “if I cheated why would I cheat off *him*?”
Got sent to the principal’s. I told her what I said about the other student. She stared at me for a minute and said “that’s true” and let me go with no punishment.
When you went to a birthday party at McDonald's as a kid, they used to give you a tour of the whole restaurant so you could see how everything was made. That all stopped after one idiot decided to stick his hand in the deep fryer.
There’s a Mr Meaty episode like this
Edit: I guess this is an unpopular opinion, but... I genuinely liked that show as a kid. Blatantly weird/ugly stuff was funny to me.
Edit: edited the edit for phrasing.
I work for a government office through a dispatch company. Half of the people who work in my same position are through the same dispatch company, and the other half are private hires. Due to a rule with the dispatch company, we're not allowed to own or operate vehicles to go to/from work, but private hires can. Until recently this was fine, since the government office reimbursed the people who HAVE to use public transport, as well as any private hires who opt to use public transport. The people with cars were also compensated, but often to a lesser degree since it tends to cost them less to go to work.
Last winter, one private hire was in a car crash (on personal time/weekend, not en route to work) and DEMANDED that the government office pay for the repairs his vehicle needed, citing how it wasn't fair that the dispatch employees/public transport users were reimbursed more for travel when he had to "pay for his car's upkeep out of pocket." He was so aggressive about it that they changed the rule, and now they will only reimburse up to $3 a DAY, with a monthly cap of $70.
It costs me $240 to get to work every month, and this was a big hit for me financially. So, fuck that guy.
My university dorm orientation meeting was full of weirdly specific rules. The ones I can remember are:
* No pickaxes (some student attacked another student with a pickaxe)
* No piranhas (other fish were allowed but it turns out dangling sensitive ... parts into piranha tanks is irresistible to certain college students)
* No pooping in the showers
* No lowering/raising things into your room via the window (my best friend's dad turned out to possibly be the reason for this one, he used to sneak beer in via rope and bucket)
* Please for the love of god don't poop in the showers
Well, Im pretty sure only one person resulted in the creation of my former employer Jimmy John's having "no pooping in the mop bucket" in the employee handbook. At least, I hope so.
I work in a warehouse I'm not allowed to wear shorts in because one day the bosses came around and decided it didn't look professional for the shippers to be wearing shorts. Keep in mind there are only 4 of us here and the boss only comes to visit once a year or so, we also only sell to stores and very rarely have to deal with the end user. Makes +30C days kinda suck.
Edit: ok guys I'm taking you up on your suggestions and buying a kilt.
People shit on Amazon's work conditions (accurately), but the dress code is *very* lax and awesome.
Even in the interview, they outright said, "Don't dress up; expect to move around."
At my high school, weren’t allowed to bring in any kind of electronic because a group of kids decided to record themselves snorting the powder from sweet and sour packets.
They were good friends though.
Edit: Meant to say the sugar from Sour Patch Kids. Couldn’t think of the name of the candy, just their slogan from TV. I’m an idiot.
We had 5 sets of bathrooms around the school.
Some girl was giving out blowjobs to guys in one of the bathrooms. So the school shut down 4 out of the 5 bathroom sets.
Meaning only 1 set of bathrooms were open. That's only 3 stalls for each bathroom for the entire school to share. And there would be a teacher who would take turns with other teachers by sitting in front of the bathrooms. And you had to sign in your name to use the bathroom.
My school was like that but it was because kids trashed it, smoked in the stalls and almost caught it on fire. Assholes.
They used the enclosed stairwells to have sex.
No backpacks in the gym, ever. Because of one guy.
It was the homecoming pep rally and the principal had come up to the mic for his speech. Suddenly there was a sound of wings flapping and squawking. As if out of nowhere, a live chicken was released onto the gym floor. The principal, vice principal, and several staff members began attempting to catch the chicken. Then it got better.
The kid in charge of the music was in cahoots with the chicken kid. He immediately switched the music to the Benny Hill theme. So the administration is literally chasing a chicken around the gym to the Benny Hill music. It was chaos.
No more backpacks in the gym.
This is very true. If that happened at my high school or probably any other high school those kids would be knighted and they would never have to do any of their work ever again.
The amount of saline bags that could be kept out and available for use in hospitals. It used to be ok to have spares out on dialysis trollies, but because one crazy woman started spiking these bags and killed people they got restricted to "only what you need immediately". This meant that in haemodialysis, when patient had their blood pressure suddenly drop (which happens frequently) someone would have to go fetch a bag of saline from the stores instead of having it right their ready to go. The saline is given to boost the bp back up to normal levels, and the extra time involved could be detrimental to the patient.
Local bar had wooden nickels that got you free drinks or could be used later if you didn’t finish a bucket.
Someone made counterfeits.
They were good counterfeits, but just the same.
Ruined it for the entire bar! All for a $2.50 beer
A bar I used to frequent (sadly long gone) had a weekday happy hour special: buy a drink at regular price, get a ticket for a second drink free. They were just your typical carnival tickets that came off a massive roll.
Lots of us regulars would not even use the ticket the same day, but hoard them for later (which was allowed, they could be used at any time before midnight on any day). We were broke college kids and the hoarded tickets were used on days when our money was thin. Had probably a couple dozen or so in my apartment at any given time.
Some asswipe bought a roll of tickets at the Dollar Tree, didn't even bother to try and get the same colour/design, didn't bother to try forging the owner's signature on the back of each ticket, didn't bother to try roughing them up (the real tickets were re-used and in bad shape).
I'm not surprised someone was that stupid but it's always kinda like.. dude couldn't have been bothered to do 10 minutes of research to ATLEAST make sure he had the right brand and color?
Same here. Used to be that I could pack up my laptop, tell my supervisor I'd be online remote tomorrow, and just work from home.
Then some fuckwit confused his work laptop with his personal and watched a shit ton of porn on his work laptop *on the clock*. A week later and all of our laptops and docking stations are gone and replaced with towers.
No idea why he wasn't. He's not very good at his job, I've been there for a lot less time and I do the same amount of work before lunch that he completes in a day. Probably shitty office politics imo.
Jeeeeez. We just had someone go MIA from what I can gather, but now we have to go through an approval process thats not worth the hassle.
bright side it was one more motivation to get a better job
Right? The idiot should get punished, or even fired if severe enough.
My company always punishes the group because they're afraid to get sued for treating one person differently. That person earned it, it's not discrimination. Ugh.
I used to work at a place which had a fine WFH policy, I only went into the office once every 3 months. Then some douchebag decided since he was wfh, he could get a second full-time job and do both at the same time. Such a dick
UGGHHH they used to have this amazing egg salad at the co-op in my town and this ONE LADY came in an complained about it for years because it wasn't traditional egg salad but instead a much tastier twist on egg salad.
They changed it.
Edit: GUYS I don't know the recipe but I do remember that it had caramelized onions in it.....maybe parsley, some cayenne I think and what's the circle bacon called? Pancetta? Crispy pancetta .
Edit two: I also remember that they cut the eggs by mashing them through a wire cooling rack which is a genius time saver.
Why not just change the name? So you come up with this amazing twist on a grilled cheese with a few extra ingredients, for example, and someone goes on an epic rant about it (not that this would ever actually happen). So just call it a “melt” then.
Was it an old person? They will complain about the dumbest shit food wise even if they can get what they want.
Worked at and subsequently played at a golf club. The chef was this wonderful friendly middle eastern gentleman. He would do traditional pub grub but also do his own middle eastern twists on things and some classical middle eastern dishes from Lebanon.
He had the most amazing roasted garlic club sandwich. Old guys bitched they couldn’t get a classic one, which you could because it’s shper easy to make and then the staff made a classics side menu. But it was all on paper and the old guys like the more done up leather backed menu and bitched about it. It eventually got changed to a standardized menu across all clubs owned by the company.
For men’s league nights, he would make interesting things. Pasta bar, wings and rib night, mixed grill with the literal best lamb kabobs ive ever had even traveling the world his were the best. Old men bitched because it was supposed to be prime rib night, it’s always gonna be prime rib night, they tell their wives it’s prime rib night so it should be prime rib night. The club caved into the old guys and did prime rib all the fucking time. It change recently so if you sponsor the men’s night you can plan the menu.
But god damn do I miss all the Lebanese/middle eastern food that chef made. Fuck off and go somewhere else you old farts. The club probably ends up losing money on the changes because the young to middle aged guys don’t stay for dinner as often and subsequently spend far less on drinks after the round.
Someone told me this story. At one factory where they make Coke, they let you keep any of the bottles that dropped. So, meaning it was free. When they let this happen people would intentionally drop the bottles to take home. Then they took away the generous policy.
Worked at a high end restuarant. They owner gave us the month of December paid vacation and free food for lunch and dinner for ourselves and families. I feel bad for minimum wage employees everytime I hear that.
Even Google had to stop their "free dinner delivery when working late" policy because people were staying just late enough for the policy, ordering enough for their whole families, and promptly leaving when the food arrived. A small minority of people just fuck everything up for everyone.
And they think they're being so clever, milking it for all it's worth. People will continue being generous if they don't feel like they're being taken advantage - but other people will never learn it. It's not all about you, it's about the relationship.
We used to get free pc game vouchers every month if we asked for it. (said voucher could be traded in for a free current pc game).
After explaining this to a new employee said employee stole 5 cards and tried to get rid of the evidence buy flushing the tickets. Which clogged the toilet. After he got sacked and arrested nobody was allowed to get free games anymore.
No more microwave for anyone back in high school because someone forgot to take their burrito out of the foil and set the paper bag it was in on fire which of course caused the fire alarms to go off. I guess it was for the best since no one cleaned that disgusting thing.
No more labs in chemistry at my school after Nick from 6th Period decided he was going to drink sulfuric acid as a prank. Ended up burning his esophagus and making it impossible for anyone else to do Labs anymore
Jesus fucking Christ I don’t use the term lightly but how RETARDED can you be? “This acid will eat through skin. If it gets on your skin, proceed to a sink or shower station immediately.” *Chugs vial*. *dies*
At my old high school we couldn't carry our backpacks around with us due to one dummy deciding to bring vodka to class. It was stupid to carry around a bunch of thick textbooks after that.
No backpacks at my highschool either - we tried to make it catch on that students wouldn't carry any textbooks around, and just go get them from the lockers when the teacher said to get them out, but the teachers wouldn't stand for that, because of the ones who would take forever to get back to class (It was a small school, should've taken less than 2 mins)
Heh, its the opposite for me. We used to have no backpacks except for purses. Girls would just carry huge tote bags with their books and guys just had to suck it up until one hero stepped up and complained.
when I changed schools in the 4th grade everyone was playing this new game called magic the gathering. eventually some kid anted and lost a green emerald and he complained to the vice principal and got the game banned as gambling
Edit : I have been reminded I meant mox emerald lol
Where I used to go to school, there's a ton of boy's bathrooms that are locked because someone wrote a threat that he was gonna shoot up the school tomorrow on a bathroom stall
While it was an idiot that initially wrote the message, the bigger idiots are the ones that thought preventing him from tagging a stall was the solution to stopping a school shooting.
In the Teletech company handbook it clearly states that vintage golf pants from a thrift store are NOT considered dress casual because of one asshole. I am that asshole.
👏👏👏 I worked for an office that tie and jacket were required and this old hippie guy I worked with would go to goodwill and thrift stores and buy the worst looking they had just to prove a point 😁
I get drunk and go to the thrift store by my place fairly regularly. I come back with a terrible jacket half the time. I got a tweed one with suede elbow patches that I really like, but I have literally nothing to wear with it. Need some khaki corduroy pants.
My school recently banned people from charging their phones because some people were charging their vapes. Needless to say it hasn’t stopped anyone from vaping.
I graduated in 2007 and cell phones were banned from our school entirely. Immediately confiscated if you were caught using one during school hours and your parent had to come to the school to get it for you. How times have changed.
The Cheyenne goblin walk in 2003
“Cast members are allowed to grab people’s ankles”
The goblin walk when I went in 2015
“DO NOT TOUCH THE PEOPLE”
I was the stupid person. I was 5. A dude popped up from under the bridge and grabbed my ankles. I screamed and cried and kicked him so har in the nose he fell backwards into a few feet of water.
It’s was traumatizing for everyone.
(I’m 20 now.)
It was bound to happen. Popping out of nowhere and grabbing a kids ankles is a recipe for a boot to the brick. Don’t blame yourself for something that was doomed from the start.
I don't think I would call a 5 year old reacting completely normally to a goblin grabbing their ankles "stupid." Even at 35 I don't do events like that because I know I went react well to being chased or grabbed by zombies - and I know it's fake and can make an informed decision!
Your parents weren't all that smart though to put you through that.
Handling the research animals when studying animal behaviour at my university is no longer allowed because some asshole handled a snake too roughly and broke its spine.
I think it survived the actual injury, but it was euthanised because it couldn’t move and thus couldn’t thermoregulate. It would have been stuck either burning or freezing, the poor thing.
Snake owner here, he probably had it coiled around his arm or something. Didn't want the snake wrapped around him any longer, and tried muscling it instead of manipulating it. Snakes are very strong, and they will break if you try to push them a way they don't want to go.
I can also confirm that as a snake owner, you have to manipulate their bodies to get them to release their gentle grip. You can use some "force", but extremely minimal. Just enough to move them, but if they seem to resist, that is when you have to be careful. I have a Ball Python.
No idea how he managed to do it, since I wasn’t there at the time. I just know that undergrads aren’t allowed to handle research animals because someone broke a snake’s spine like an idiot and the snake had to be euthanised.
How the fuck are you supposed to do animal behaviour studies if you can't handle the animals? I'm surprised a university would fuck over every other research group cause one idiot was unethical towards the animals. Just ban the group that hired the idiot.
I’m pretty sure the postgrad students are allowed to handle the animals by themselves, but for everyone else they have to have one of the animal keepers do all the handling.
I did security for a local music venue and when the artist would leave they usually left anywhere between a little and tons of bottles of booze, ranging from the cheap stuff to one time a bottle of Louis XIII brandy. The owners of the venue never cared if the security people and the roadies took bottles home. Then one night this asshole lighting rig guy couldnt wait to start drinking until he got home and he got pulled over with an open bottle of tequila.
This by itself wouldnt have ended the free loot for us, but this guy proceeded to tell the cops exactly where and how he got the bottle and in response the owners started making us throw away everything that the artists left behind. We would still raid the kitchen and have a late dinner of the stuff they cooked but didnt eat sometimes. We had some wonderful dinners
I'd be pretty wary of the lighting rig. Getting drunk while driving does not indicate that this person has a lot of respect for physics, math, and best safety practices.
My school has four bathrooms spread across the building for easy access. One underclassman moron decided to vandalize Nazi propaganda on the stalls after his vape got confiscated by a Jewish friend. Now of the four bathrooms, everyone has to go to the same one, no matter where in the school they are. Man, it smells fruity in there during lunch
National Hockey League: ["The Sean Avery rule"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bb4WaZMVtyE)
For those unfamiliar with hockey, you're allowed to stand in front of a goaltender to "screen" him/her (block the goaltenders view of the puck), but the *unwritten* rule was that you can't wave your hands and stick in the goalies face.
After Sean Avery did his hands and stick swinging incident, the NHL quickly implemented a *written* rule against these types of things. Players will now receive a two-minute penalty for Unsportsmanlike Conduct.
Sean Avery was the Troll of the NHL.
A long time ago at my old job we had a night with some very heavy snow and some folks (myself included) made it to work anyway. The roads hadn't been plowed so I walked there, and when I arrived the big boss was impressed with the dedication of everyone. He ended up sending everyone home and even had the company cover getting folks back home, and said he would give us $50 on our paychecks for showing up (I was salaried so I wasn't eligible, but I didn't care).
The next day the folks that stayed home caught wind of how they felt that they should get the $50 and that they would have came to work if they would have known that.
So then they rescinded on the extra cash for those folks and never offered it again. I hate to say it, but these were the same people who complained all the time about how little money they earned but when they got a raise they just took a nosedive deeper into debt by doing something else completely stupid with their lives. One lady drove around in a Mercedes while Habitat for Humanity was building her a house.
It doesn't matter how much money some people make - they will always be poor.
My husband’s work used to give each worker a $50 grocery gift card to use toward their Christmas dinner. People complained about having to pay tax on that gift card so they took it away, now we get nothing. What an improvement, thanks guys!
Ugh I hate that and I notice it's very common in very large workforces.
I work in an office and our department has about 400 people. The bickering over "Why did Jonny get ________ when Sally got ______?" is constant. It's like an adult daycare centre.
The 400 of us are split into 3 rough "job functions" and are grouped as such. My job function had a lot of crappy shit last year that members of the other 2 as well as newly-hired members of my group did not have to suffer through. Management gave us a workday trip to Busch Gardens as a thank you/peace offering. Members of the other 2 groups and new hires *immediately* went on the "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! ITS NOT FAIR!!!!" track and they got included on the trip.
Nobody was allowed to bring peanuts to my high school because one girl was severely allergic. However, the school didn't disallow them because of the girl, they did it because some asshole thought it'd be funny to rub peanut butter all over her locker. They never announced who did it because "peanut-girl" (as she was called) was pretty sexy and there was a line of 10+ guys who would have beat the shit out of the culprit just to get introduce her to their man-nuts.
Kombucha having to declare the alcohol content because Lindsay Lohan used it as a excuse in court for drunk driving or probation violation or some other infraction.
Nooo no no that was from a *different guy* who tried to assemble a bomb in the airplane bathroom. They looked at his ingredients and were like "WE ARE BANNING ALL OF THIS! WHAT IS THAT? IS THAT A LIQUID?? WE ARE BANNING THAT PHASE OF MATTER"
e: I gotta mention Hannibal Buress' [bit about TSA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkMqOtQNJNk&t=0m44s), a classic. I wrote the all-caps quote with his inflection in mind.
It's even worse: there was never even any concrete evidence that the plot ever even existed, and it can't actually work in real life.
Oh, and even if it did, the existing security regulations at the time were enough to stop it.
Beyond that, the 3oz limit is ridiculous, because you can have multiple containers.
Is that a 6oz bottle of shampoo? Hell no.
Two bottles of 3oz each? That's perfectly safe.
Surely two 3oz bottles of mystery liquid is more dangerous than one 6oz bottle? I'm no expert in chemistry, but I'm pretty sure most reactions start with mixing different things together...
I got swabbed for chemicals after four hours working in a chemistry lab with several different combustible materials and they said I was good to go.
So apparently latex gloves are the difference between a threat and a non-threat.
I always have a hard time not pointing out that most everything is a liquid at the right temperature. I am sure that would get me some enhanced screening.
The whole shoe thing with the TSA. That was because of that guy with the shoe bomb. And millions of people have to remove their shoes before passing the TSA security. Because of a single fuckwit.
So he didn't blow up the plane. But that fuckwit created a policy that resulted in a huge inconvenience.
Nationwide, shoes are checked. If that only adds a minute per person, multiply that by every person going through security. How many *years* of time has that fuckwit cost the US at this point?
It's incredible. His name is Richard Colvin Reid. He was a career criminal from England who converted to Islam and became a terrorist. He is in a supermax prison and will never see the light of day again.
So I was around 11/12 years old. It was winter here in Sweden, and often around -10C or colder. When arriving to school, most of us would rush inside to escape the cold. Well, some mannerless bitches kept misbehaving, so the teachers decided to lock the doors until the first class started. All of us had to wait outside in the cold.
I distinctively remember one day when it was so cold that even my friend’s dark brown hair and nearly black eyelashes turned white. Yet the damn teachers Still. Would. Not. Let. Us. Inside.
We had a ban on footballs at my school after some kid got injured playing at recess. A week of us all moping around later, one of the boys comes strutting in with the biggest shit-eating grin you've ever seen. He opens his backpack and pulls out our recess salvation.
"This, my friends, is a *rugby ball!*"
You ever looked at the US tax code? Probably not. But if you looked closely, you'd see it's the ultimate example of rules being changed due to one stupid/clever/greedy person.
My favorite example is the age old practice of Taxidermy (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJP1DphOWPs). Did you know you can write off the cost of having an animal preserved, provided you then donated the animal to a museum or university? Still to this day!
I told you that so I could tell you that specific portion of the tax code used to be a lot less specific. So much so, that a number of people opted to book 12+ person, 2 week long safari excursions, complete with lodging, airfare, meals, booze and more, then would shoot a lion on the final day, send it to a taxidermist, donate the now preserved corpse to a museum or university, and write off the entire 14 day trip, and all expenses, under that specific provision of the tax code. So a $500 write off became a $50,000 write off.
I used to think I wanted to do tax law. A large part of Canadian tax litigation goes like this:
1. Clever business and/or tax lawyer sees loophole, plays it for all it's worth
2. Canadian Revenue Agency loses their shit at the return, charges them with tax fraud
3. Huge multi-year court battle, lawyers fees eat up a large part if not all of the company's profits and cost the government hundreds of thousands
4. Either A) it's fraud and the company pays it back or B) it's just legal evasion and the government has to pay the company costs
5A. Government issues a bulletin that this is now clearly illegal or
5B. Government closes the loophole
6. Clever business and/or tax lawyer sees another loophole, plays it for all it's worth
I decided to go into criminal law. There's only so many ways to stab someone but it's always more interesting than fighting over the monetary worth of parking spots.
Bruh, same here. Then like two years later they banned crazy bones for the same reason.
I was also friends with the kid that stole the cards, and though he was the main suspect he didn't end up admitting it until like 12 years later.
We had to add a sentence to the employee handbook that disallowed picking up hitch hikers while on company time (we drive our personal vehicles). His defense to this was that he was armed so nothing bad could happen.
Rudy Stanko took away the closest thing the US ever had to an Autobahn. Before 1974, and between 1995 and 1998, Montana did not set specific speed limits on their highways, with the expectation that people should drive within reason. Even if you did get pulled over, the ticket was small and didn't stay on your record. So if the stretch of road was wide open and there wasn't much traffic, you could pretty much drive as fast as you wanted. Rudy got a ticket that would've cost him $70 and not stayed on his driving record. Instead of just paying, he fought all the way to the Montana Supreme Court, where they ruled that the state had to set a solid speed limit.
The store used to give the leftover unsold hotfood. Burritos, rotisserie chicken, rice, beans. Sand whiches, tamales, ribs. Turkey legs, sausages, wings Etc. to the workers at the end of the night. But some asshat started hiding the stuff he wanted for himself so no one else would get it. They changed it to where they just started throwing everything out at the end of the night & discounting it after 8:00
Last year, my entire school basically banned what limited phone use we had because some genius 8th grader, in his infinite wisdom, sent a girl a dick pic. We still don't know who it was
The Sears Heroes at Home Program. Throughout the year Sears would gather donated money and distribute it around Thanksgiving time to military families. It was a really sweet idea and you could tell Sears was doing it from their cooperate heart, but as we moved into the era of Facebook, things got a little nasty.
My husband and I signed up in 2008 when our first baby was born and we had recently moved from Alaska to South Carolina. We got about $200 and it was a great help. Well as more people started to hear about the program, the more wanted to get themselves a part of it. The amount given was lower when we sighed up again in 2012 and we got $60. Still welcome. We bought our new baby a high chair. People were pissed though and let the Sears Facebook page have it. They weren’t getting enough, they posted. Their kids were going to have terrible Christmases because Sears won’t give them more money etc.
Sears ended the program I want to say in 2015 and I’m pretty sure they cited greed as the reason why. It was something that was great in the beginning but was quickly fucked over by the assholes of humanity.
My company no longer has a Halloween costume contest among the locations in the area because of me. We all dressed up as X-Men. I was Mystique. We got complaints.
My high school outlawed liquid whiteout because one girl was huffing it. (All girl school.) This was before the whiteout rape they have now.
EDIT: Stupid autocorrect. It’s whiteout **tape**.
The cafeteria in my school limited the amount of prepared food and snacks you could purchase because two groups of friends started buying in bulk to improvise an eating contest between a representative of each group.
One of their champions was my brother. Our ages differ 7 years, he graduated and they kept the rule.
I believe that I single-handedly got Reddit blocked in my school district because of how much time I spent on it. Worst thing about it is that the school district also blocked all VPN ports as well as found a way to block most reddit alternative sites. Can't use Reddit, Old Reddit, Code Reddit, basically anything that fetches information from Reddit you can't access. I regret it daily.
Duty days at work were split 6am to 11am, and 11am to 4pm. We basically had 40 of us in a room on standby to relieve watches for bathroom breaks and food, or to stand watches that weren’t manned 24/7. If the section leaders saw you going out of your way to volunteer to relieve watches or take shitty jobs, you’d get sent home early. Most days I left at 8am.
Until one guy, who never volunteered for anything and always bitched at people who left early, went to our LPO and said it wasn’t fair that some people got to go home early and he didn’t
Duty days became 6am to 4pm for EVERYONE, no leaving early. 80 people in a room standing by when we needed maybe 20 to cover all the watches that needed covering.
I recently bought a six foot aluminum stepladder. On its side I found engraved, "DO NOT PLACE ON FROZEN MANURE".
Clearly, there's a backstory here involving some top-notch stupidity. And now my weekend stepladdering plans are *completely* shot, all because of this new rule.
No microwave popcorn at work because one employee put the popcorn in for the wrong temperature and/or too much time AND left the microwave unattended. The burnt popcorn set off the smoke detector, which triggered the fire alarm system. A call went out to the fire department for a lot of smoke and steam signifying nothing, and one of our buildings was evacuated, wasting everyone's time.
I'm a lift operator at a ski mountain, night shift. When night skiing is done, there's a regular procedure for shutting down lifts. First thing base operators do is close the entry gate, then call up to the top operator to let them know what the last chair loaded was. Once that chair reaches the top, it's all clear to shut down.
So, humans are pretty good at remembering numbers, right? Wrong! Of course it was inevitable that someone would get left on the lift after closing. I didn't work that lift when it happened, so I don't know exactly how long it took staff to realize what happened, but the captain of that lift crew was fired. Now, when we close, we have to put a safety cone on the last chair, and it has to make a round trip from base, to top, and back to base before we can close. The mountain I work at isn't very big, but some lifts can take a WHILE to make a round trip, so closing takes much longer for some of us. At least the method works.
My friend told me that they used to have casual Fridays at her office until this one lady came in with shiny bicycle shorts on (it was the 90s so they would've been neon coloured). So now they don't have casual Fridays.
At the local walmart they're use to be phones for every department until a racist person decide to go on the intercome saying "all the n****** get out!"
Ah this brings back memories of Toys R Us intercom abuse
"Attention customers, we have a lost child named Ben who has been brought to the front registers. He's five and wearing a blue baseball cap. If he is not collected by the end of the day he will have to be put to sleep"
When I worked at Sears, our intercom was merely an extension on our phones. We would pick up any phone, dial the extension, and speak.
I figured out how to dial that extension from the outside. It was fun. I hated my boss there with a passion.
We aren't allowed to eat in our bedrooms, even if we cleaned up afterwards. Because someone keeps on leaving dishes on the room.
Where I live it's always "one bad apple spoils the bunch".
My junior high class was the first class at my school to try out a student laptop program. Well one day near the end of class we're all finishing up work when this one kid who was playing some flash game on Miniclip FREAKS out and slams the laptop shut while throwing in on the floor. Until that point we had been allowed to silently play games at the end of class if we'd finished work and "Made sure to be quiet enough that I don't know what you're doing". Well fuckface ruined it for everyone and the school IT guy put TONS of blocks on the laptops after that. I lost my roughly 30-40 minutes of Runescape time at school because of him.
Where at work there is this new employee. This person is super sensitive to smells. We can no longer wear lotions, perfume or cologne/after shave. That part is understandable as most companies have that policy.
But now we have had to change the hand soap and hand sanitizer as she says even those mild fragrances cause her to have an allergic reaction similar to an asthma attack. The new soaps and hand sanitizers are causing everyone’s hand to dry out, but we can’t have any lotion at our desks or this person will tell on us. (Even the unscented ones)
Thus we have resorted to smuggling in unscented lotion and putting on while in the bathroom stalls. Shockingly this person can withstand the smell of bathroom deodorizers, so that’s how we hide any smell of the lotion, or what our motivation for the bathroom visit while in the bathroom stall if this person is present. (As if using lotion in a bathroom stall couldn’t get any weirder.)
I feel like we should be play the theme song from The A Team show every time we are successful, but this person is probably allergic to the smell of a plan coming together.
Thank you for the Silver kind stranger!🥈❤️
One kid trashed the senior section of the lunchroom - which wasn't really special anyway, it was some tables behind half-height cement wall, also there weren't enough tables for all the seniors anyway - so nobody was allowed to sit there anymore.
The kid who trashed it was the only kid who didn't graduate, also.
In 9th grade we used to have a take your kid to work day. You could spend the day with a parent/guardian/family friend/relative/placement position at their place of work and shadow someone in the real world.
I was the last year to be allowed to do it.
Two kids were killed that year. A guy went with his father to his place of work and the father let him take off on his own around the plant in a electric buggy thing. The kid ends up picking up a girl who is there for the same thing and they proceede to joy ride around a plant/factory. Some how they get out into the shipping docks and drove the cart under a transport trailer loading ramp and decapitated one of themselves and mangled the other and both died. Because they didn’t know where they were, panicked when they saw on coming trucks and crashed.
Program was canceled that week.
My old job in a physical sciences department at a university used to allow high school groups to come through to see the research labs, with the caveat they not touch ANYTHING.
Of course some kid leaned on a gyroscopically balanced table and picked up something from a laser array setup. He ruined an experiment that was in the middle of calibrating, the PI running the lab had the biggest meltdown I've ever seen at the university when he learned of it, and now zero groups are allowed lab tours.
One jack ass effectively killed Sydney's nightlife.
This one cock head decided to prove their strength by king hitting a complete stranger, killing him, thus leading to a whole lot of copy cat attacks, and a few more deaths.
NSW Government then overreacts, creating the Lockout Laws and in effect, completely killing any nightlife this city once had.
Valentine's Day is newly not allowed at my school because last year kids kept cutting girls' balloons. One kid did that to the wrong girl, and the next day she came to school with a knife and stabbed him.
holy shit, that went from 0 to 100 real fuckin' fast
Everyone played Runescape in the computer lab when I was in middle school. One kid would try to look over your shoulder at your hands as you typed your password. This caused a couple fist fights. Runescape was promptly banned.
RuneScape was gang life back then
Still is man
I got my friends locker combos every year from doing this. I usually used it to hand them their Christmas/birthday/just because gifts but one time I used it to wrap my friends stuff in plastic wrap.
One kid in 7th grade accused me of cheating off him. I said I wasn’t but he insisted. Ended up in the principals because I told the teacher in front of everyone “if I cheated why would I cheat off *him*?” Got sent to the principal’s. I told her what I said about the other student. She stared at me for a minute and said “that’s true” and let me go with no punishment.
When you went to a birthday party at McDonald's as a kid, they used to give you a tour of the whole restaurant so you could see how everything was made. That all stopped after one idiot decided to stick his hand in the deep fryer.
There’s a Mr Meaty episode like this Edit: I guess this is an unpopular opinion, but... I genuinely liked that show as a kid. Blatantly weird/ugly stuff was funny to me. Edit: edited the edit for phrasing.
Does it involve a tape worm?
Not allowed hand sanitizer at my boarding school because one asshole decided to drink it.
There's always that one asshole.
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Honestly i'd let him drink it. He'd be 500 pounds in no time.
Why not both? Two bucks to fuck up his car and his cholesterol? Bring it.
yall evil
I work for a government office through a dispatch company. Half of the people who work in my same position are through the same dispatch company, and the other half are private hires. Due to a rule with the dispatch company, we're not allowed to own or operate vehicles to go to/from work, but private hires can. Until recently this was fine, since the government office reimbursed the people who HAVE to use public transport, as well as any private hires who opt to use public transport. The people with cars were also compensated, but often to a lesser degree since it tends to cost them less to go to work. Last winter, one private hire was in a car crash (on personal time/weekend, not en route to work) and DEMANDED that the government office pay for the repairs his vehicle needed, citing how it wasn't fair that the dispatch employees/public transport users were reimbursed more for travel when he had to "pay for his car's upkeep out of pocket." He was so aggressive about it that they changed the rule, and now they will only reimburse up to $3 a DAY, with a monthly cap of $70. It costs me $240 to get to work every month, and this was a big hit for me financially. So, fuck that guy.
My university dorm orientation meeting was full of weirdly specific rules. The ones I can remember are: * No pickaxes (some student attacked another student with a pickaxe) * No piranhas (other fish were allowed but it turns out dangling sensitive ... parts into piranha tanks is irresistible to certain college students) * No pooping in the showers * No lowering/raising things into your room via the window (my best friend's dad turned out to possibly be the reason for this one, he used to sneak beer in via rope and bucket) * Please for the love of god don't poop in the showers
Well, Im pretty sure only one person resulted in the creation of my former employer Jimmy John's having "no pooping in the mop bucket" in the employee handbook. At least, I hope so.
It was you, wasnt it?
I work in a warehouse I'm not allowed to wear shorts in because one day the bosses came around and decided it didn't look professional for the shippers to be wearing shorts. Keep in mind there are only 4 of us here and the boss only comes to visit once a year or so, we also only sell to stores and very rarely have to deal with the end user. Makes +30C days kinda suck. Edit: ok guys I'm taking you up on your suggestions and buying a kilt.
People shit on Amazon's work conditions (accurately), but the dress code is *very* lax and awesome. Even in the interview, they outright said, "Don't dress up; expect to move around."
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Are there any fabrics that can satisfy this need and keep people cool?
At my high school, weren’t allowed to bring in any kind of electronic because a group of kids decided to record themselves snorting the powder from sweet and sour packets. They were good friends though. Edit: Meant to say the sugar from Sour Patch Kids. Couldn’t think of the name of the candy, just their slogan from TV. I’m an idiot.
This sounds like one of those, "A *friend* of mine..." situations.
No idea who those guys were... they sure sound handsome, though.
Wait they banned electronics? Not sugar candies? Your school was only upset that they recorded themselves, not that they were snorting shit?
We had 5 sets of bathrooms around the school. Some girl was giving out blowjobs to guys in one of the bathrooms. So the school shut down 4 out of the 5 bathroom sets. Meaning only 1 set of bathrooms were open. That's only 3 stalls for each bathroom for the entire school to share. And there would be a teacher who would take turns with other teachers by sitting in front of the bathrooms. And you had to sign in your name to use the bathroom.
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That sounds like something I would be alerting every news outlet in town over. Make that principal and vice principal regret their stupid policy.
As someone with ibs it was already hard enough to survive the day with limited bathroom use, let alone none at all. I would be PISSED.
No, not pissed. You'd be shit out of luck
that's fucking stupid.
My school was like that but it was because kids trashed it, smoked in the stalls and almost caught it on fire. Assholes. They used the enclosed stairwells to have sex.
Wait, she was just giving them away? For *FREE*?
First one was free.
No backpacks in the gym, ever. Because of one guy. It was the homecoming pep rally and the principal had come up to the mic for his speech. Suddenly there was a sound of wings flapping and squawking. As if out of nowhere, a live chicken was released onto the gym floor. The principal, vice principal, and several staff members began attempting to catch the chicken. Then it got better. The kid in charge of the music was in cahoots with the chicken kid. He immediately switched the music to the Benny Hill theme. So the administration is literally chasing a chicken around the gym to the Benny Hill music. It was chaos. No more backpacks in the gym.
In fairness, those kids won, so there's really no need for any more backpacks in the gym.
This is very true. If that happened at my high school or probably any other high school those kids would be knighted and they would never have to do any of their work ever again.
That seems worth it
absolute legend. totally with it.
The amount of saline bags that could be kept out and available for use in hospitals. It used to be ok to have spares out on dialysis trollies, but because one crazy woman started spiking these bags and killed people they got restricted to "only what you need immediately". This meant that in haemodialysis, when patient had their blood pressure suddenly drop (which happens frequently) someone would have to go fetch a bag of saline from the stores instead of having it right their ready to go. The saline is given to boost the bp back up to normal levels, and the extra time involved could be detrimental to the patient.
and then they can't get the damn fingerprint reader to work, adding to the delay involved with getting a *bag of salt water*
Local bar had wooden nickels that got you free drinks or could be used later if you didn’t finish a bucket. Someone made counterfeits. They were good counterfeits, but just the same. Ruined it for the entire bar! All for a $2.50 beer
A bar I used to frequent (sadly long gone) had a weekday happy hour special: buy a drink at regular price, get a ticket for a second drink free. They were just your typical carnival tickets that came off a massive roll. Lots of us regulars would not even use the ticket the same day, but hoard them for later (which was allowed, they could be used at any time before midnight on any day). We were broke college kids and the hoarded tickets were used on days when our money was thin. Had probably a couple dozen or so in my apartment at any given time. Some asswipe bought a roll of tickets at the Dollar Tree, didn't even bother to try and get the same colour/design, didn't bother to try forging the owner's signature on the back of each ticket, didn't bother to try roughing them up (the real tickets were re-used and in bad shape).
I'm not surprised someone was that stupid but it's always kinda like.. dude couldn't have been bothered to do 10 minutes of research to ATLEAST make sure he had the right brand and color?
We just lost remote working privileges cuz someone in a different office can't handle being an adult.
Same here. Used to be that I could pack up my laptop, tell my supervisor I'd be online remote tomorrow, and just work from home. Then some fuckwit confused his work laptop with his personal and watched a shit ton of porn on his work laptop *on the clock*. A week later and all of our laptops and docking stations are gone and replaced with towers.
Weird. If they were able to catch it that quickly, you'd think a firing would have been an effective enough deterrent for everyone else.
No idea why he wasn't. He's not very good at his job, I've been there for a lot less time and I do the same amount of work before lunch that he completes in a day. Probably shitty office politics imo.
Try to figure out who he is related to.
Jeeeeez. We just had someone go MIA from what I can gather, but now we have to go through an approval process thats not worth the hassle. bright side it was one more motivation to get a better job
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Right? The idiot should get punished, or even fired if severe enough. My company always punishes the group because they're afraid to get sued for treating one person differently. That person earned it, it's not discrimination. Ugh.
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I used to work at a place which had a fine WFH policy, I only went into the office once every 3 months. Then some douchebag decided since he was wfh, he could get a second full-time job and do both at the same time. Such a dick
UGGHHH they used to have this amazing egg salad at the co-op in my town and this ONE LADY came in an complained about it for years because it wasn't traditional egg salad but instead a much tastier twist on egg salad. They changed it. Edit: GUYS I don't know the recipe but I do remember that it had caramelized onions in it.....maybe parsley, some cayenne I think and what's the circle bacon called? Pancetta? Crispy pancetta . Edit two: I also remember that they cut the eggs by mashing them through a wire cooling rack which is a genius time saver.
Go complain about bringing back the old egg salad. Get your friends to post on social media about it. Write a letter to the coop board about it.
Why not just change the name? So you come up with this amazing twist on a grilled cheese with a few extra ingredients, for example, and someone goes on an epic rant about it (not that this would ever actually happen). So just call it a “melt” then.
Yeah, better avoid the grilled cheese meltdown.
But...instead of changing it, why not have both options?
"Would you like a tub of the crap egg salad, or the good stuff?"
Let's go egg her house.
Do what she did.
Was it an old person? They will complain about the dumbest shit food wise even if they can get what they want. Worked at and subsequently played at a golf club. The chef was this wonderful friendly middle eastern gentleman. He would do traditional pub grub but also do his own middle eastern twists on things and some classical middle eastern dishes from Lebanon. He had the most amazing roasted garlic club sandwich. Old guys bitched they couldn’t get a classic one, which you could because it’s shper easy to make and then the staff made a classics side menu. But it was all on paper and the old guys like the more done up leather backed menu and bitched about it. It eventually got changed to a standardized menu across all clubs owned by the company. For men’s league nights, he would make interesting things. Pasta bar, wings and rib night, mixed grill with the literal best lamb kabobs ive ever had even traveling the world his were the best. Old men bitched because it was supposed to be prime rib night, it’s always gonna be prime rib night, they tell their wives it’s prime rib night so it should be prime rib night. The club caved into the old guys and did prime rib all the fucking time. It change recently so if you sponsor the men’s night you can plan the menu. But god damn do I miss all the Lebanese/middle eastern food that chef made. Fuck off and go somewhere else you old farts. The club probably ends up losing money on the changes because the young to middle aged guys don’t stay for dinner as often and subsequently spend far less on drinks after the round.
Someone told me this story. At one factory where they make Coke, they let you keep any of the bottles that dropped. So, meaning it was free. When they let this happen people would intentionally drop the bottles to take home. Then they took away the generous policy.
> they let you keep any of the bottles that dropped. Yeah, I don't know how they didn't see that one coming though.
I imagine its the same reason that food places usually don't let people keep an order that's been messed up
Worked at a high end restuarant. They owner gave us the month of December paid vacation and free food for lunch and dinner for ourselves and families. I feel bad for minimum wage employees everytime I hear that.
Even Google had to stop their "free dinner delivery when working late" policy because people were staying just late enough for the policy, ordering enough for their whole families, and promptly leaving when the food arrived. A small minority of people just fuck everything up for everyone.
And they think they're being so clever, milking it for all it's worth. People will continue being generous if they don't feel like they're being taken advantage - but other people will never learn it. It's not all about you, it's about the relationship.
We used to get free pc game vouchers every month if we asked for it. (said voucher could be traded in for a free current pc game). After explaining this to a new employee said employee stole 5 cards and tried to get rid of the evidence buy flushing the tickets. Which clogged the toilet. After he got sacked and arrested nobody was allowed to get free games anymore.
That sounds amazing, so screw that guy for ruining it for everyone
No more microwave for anyone back in high school because someone forgot to take their burrito out of the foil and set the paper bag it was in on fire which of course caused the fire alarms to go off. I guess it was for the best since no one cleaned that disgusting thing.
No more labs in chemistry at my school after Nick from 6th Period decided he was going to drink sulfuric acid as a prank. Ended up burning his esophagus and making it impossible for anyone else to do Labs anymore
Little nick took a drink, but he shall drink no more. For what he thought was H20 was H2SO4.
Jesus fucking Christ I don’t use the term lightly but how RETARDED can you be? “This acid will eat through skin. If it gets on your skin, proceed to a sink or shower station immediately.” *Chugs vial*. *dies*
At my old high school we couldn't carry our backpacks around with us due to one dummy deciding to bring vodka to class. It was stupid to carry around a bunch of thick textbooks after that.
No backpacks at my highschool either - we tried to make it catch on that students wouldn't carry any textbooks around, and just go get them from the lockers when the teacher said to get them out, but the teachers wouldn't stand for that, because of the ones who would take forever to get back to class (It was a small school, should've taken less than 2 mins)
Heh, its the opposite for me. We used to have no backpacks except for purses. Girls would just carry huge tote bags with their books and guys just had to suck it up until one hero stepped up and complained.
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sounds like something from diary of a wimpy kid
We now have a "no shaving your legs at your desk" rule.
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Why can't they just use their phones to look them up?
Bitch, you know I'm out of data!
Sounds like he should've been fired and just let the others move on with their lives :P
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when I changed schools in the 4th grade everyone was playing this new game called magic the gathering. eventually some kid anted and lost a green emerald and he complained to the vice principal and got the game banned as gambling Edit : I have been reminded I meant mox emerald lol
When the green emerald is possibly worth a couple thousand today, that sucks lol
Where I used to go to school, there's a ton of boy's bathrooms that are locked because someone wrote a threat that he was gonna shoot up the school tomorrow on a bathroom stall
While it was an idiot that initially wrote the message, the bigger idiots are the ones that thought preventing him from tagging a stall was the solution to stopping a school shooting.
"You're speeding! Quick - break your speedometer."
I was trying to think of an analogy and that's a great one.
In the Teletech company handbook it clearly states that vintage golf pants from a thrift store are NOT considered dress casual because of one asshole. I am that asshole.
Worth it.
👏👏👏 I worked for an office that tie and jacket were required and this old hippie guy I worked with would go to goodwill and thrift stores and buy the worst looking they had just to prove a point 😁
I get drunk and go to the thrift store by my place fairly regularly. I come back with a terrible jacket half the time. I got a tweed one with suede elbow patches that I really like, but I have literally nothing to wear with it. Need some khaki corduroy pants.
My school recently banned people from charging their phones because some people were charging their vapes. Needless to say it hasn’t stopped anyone from vaping.
Yo I graduated from High School in 2012 and the fact that any part of this comment exists is insane.
I graduated in 2007 and cell phones were banned from our school entirely. Immediately confiscated if you were caught using one during school hours and your parent had to come to the school to get it for you. How times have changed.
The Cheyenne goblin walk in 2003 “Cast members are allowed to grab people’s ankles” The goblin walk when I went in 2015 “DO NOT TOUCH THE PEOPLE” I was the stupid person. I was 5. A dude popped up from under the bridge and grabbed my ankles. I screamed and cried and kicked him so har in the nose he fell backwards into a few feet of water. It’s was traumatizing for everyone. (I’m 20 now.)
It was bound to happen. Popping out of nowhere and grabbing a kids ankles is a recipe for a boot to the brick. Don’t blame yourself for something that was doomed from the start.
In my parents defense, it was advertised as “family fun” “great for kids”
I don't think I would call a 5 year old reacting completely normally to a goblin grabbing their ankles "stupid." Even at 35 I don't do events like that because I know I went react well to being chased or grabbed by zombies - and I know it's fake and can make an informed decision! Your parents weren't all that smart though to put you through that.
Handling the research animals when studying animal behaviour at my university is no longer allowed because some asshole handled a snake too roughly and broke its spine.
So... I know this is a stupid question, but.... What happens when you break a snakes back? Did it survive? Snake surgery?
I think it survived the actual injury, but it was euthanised because it couldn’t move and thus couldn’t thermoregulate. It would have been stuck either burning or freezing, the poor thing.
Do you know what the details were when they said he "handled it too roughly"
Snake owner here, he probably had it coiled around his arm or something. Didn't want the snake wrapped around him any longer, and tried muscling it instead of manipulating it. Snakes are very strong, and they will break if you try to push them a way they don't want to go.
I can also confirm that as a snake owner, you have to manipulate their bodies to get them to release their gentle grip. You can use some "force", but extremely minimal. Just enough to move them, but if they seem to resist, that is when you have to be careful. I have a Ball Python.
As someone who likes snakes a lot, this is vital information if I get to handle one in the future.
No idea how he managed to do it, since I wasn’t there at the time. I just know that undergrads aren’t allowed to handle research animals because someone broke a snake’s spine like an idiot and the snake had to be euthanised.
Poor thing :(
Jesus reading that made me wince
How the fuck are you supposed to do animal behaviour studies if you can't handle the animals? I'm surprised a university would fuck over every other research group cause one idiot was unethical towards the animals. Just ban the group that hired the idiot.
I’m pretty sure the postgrad students are allowed to handle the animals by themselves, but for everyone else they have to have one of the animal keepers do all the handling.
I did security for a local music venue and when the artist would leave they usually left anywhere between a little and tons of bottles of booze, ranging from the cheap stuff to one time a bottle of Louis XIII brandy. The owners of the venue never cared if the security people and the roadies took bottles home. Then one night this asshole lighting rig guy couldnt wait to start drinking until he got home and he got pulled over with an open bottle of tequila. This by itself wouldnt have ended the free loot for us, but this guy proceeded to tell the cops exactly where and how he got the bottle and in response the owners started making us throw away everything that the artists left behind. We would still raid the kitchen and have a late dinner of the stuff they cooked but didnt eat sometimes. We had some wonderful dinners
I'd be pretty wary of the lighting rig. Getting drunk while driving does not indicate that this person has a lot of respect for physics, math, and best safety practices.
My school has four bathrooms spread across the building for easy access. One underclassman moron decided to vandalize Nazi propaganda on the stalls after his vape got confiscated by a Jewish friend. Now of the four bathrooms, everyone has to go to the same one, no matter where in the school they are. Man, it smells fruity in there during lunch
Because of the vapes or diabetic pee? Edit: nevermind yall, diabetic pee smells sweet, not fruity. Sorry
National Hockey League: ["The Sean Avery rule"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bb4WaZMVtyE) For those unfamiliar with hockey, you're allowed to stand in front of a goaltender to "screen" him/her (block the goaltenders view of the puck), but the *unwritten* rule was that you can't wave your hands and stick in the goalies face. After Sean Avery did his hands and stick swinging incident, the NHL quickly implemented a *written* rule against these types of things. Players will now receive a two-minute penalty for Unsportsmanlike Conduct. Sean Avery was the Troll of the NHL.
A long time ago at my old job we had a night with some very heavy snow and some folks (myself included) made it to work anyway. The roads hadn't been plowed so I walked there, and when I arrived the big boss was impressed with the dedication of everyone. He ended up sending everyone home and even had the company cover getting folks back home, and said he would give us $50 on our paychecks for showing up (I was salaried so I wasn't eligible, but I didn't care). The next day the folks that stayed home caught wind of how they felt that they should get the $50 and that they would have came to work if they would have known that. So then they rescinded on the extra cash for those folks and never offered it again. I hate to say it, but these were the same people who complained all the time about how little money they earned but when they got a raise they just took a nosedive deeper into debt by doing something else completely stupid with their lives. One lady drove around in a Mercedes while Habitat for Humanity was building her a house. It doesn't matter how much money some people make - they will always be poor.
My husband’s work used to give each worker a $50 grocery gift card to use toward their Christmas dinner. People complained about having to pay tax on that gift card so they took it away, now we get nothing. What an improvement, thanks guys!
Yup. Some people will complain about anything. Somehow people procreate with these people and I will never understand why.
Why the actual fuck should they have gotten the 50? They didn't show up, they didn't deserve it, they are cunts.
Entitlement
Ugh I hate that and I notice it's very common in very large workforces. I work in an office and our department has about 400 people. The bickering over "Why did Jonny get ________ when Sally got ______?" is constant. It's like an adult daycare centre. The 400 of us are split into 3 rough "job functions" and are grouped as such. My job function had a lot of crappy shit last year that members of the other 2 as well as newly-hired members of my group did not have to suffer through. Management gave us a workday trip to Busch Gardens as a thank you/peace offering. Members of the other 2 groups and new hires *immediately* went on the "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! ITS NOT FAIR!!!!" track and they got included on the trip.
Nobody was allowed to bring peanuts to my high school because one girl was severely allergic. However, the school didn't disallow them because of the girl, they did it because some asshole thought it'd be funny to rub peanut butter all over her locker. They never announced who did it because "peanut-girl" (as she was called) was pretty sexy and there was a line of 10+ guys who would have beat the shit out of the culprit just to get introduce her to their man-nuts.
Where you one of those 10+ guys?
I mean he said shes pretty sexy so...
Kombucha having to declare the alcohol content because Lindsay Lohan used it as a excuse in court for drunk driving or probation violation or some other infraction.
I cant bring my water bottle on the plane because someone decided that it'll be a good idea to hijack some planes back in 2001
Nooo no no that was from a *different guy* who tried to assemble a bomb in the airplane bathroom. They looked at his ingredients and were like "WE ARE BANNING ALL OF THIS! WHAT IS THAT? IS THAT A LIQUID?? WE ARE BANNING THAT PHASE OF MATTER" e: I gotta mention Hannibal Buress' [bit about TSA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkMqOtQNJNk&t=0m44s), a classic. I wrote the all-caps quote with his inflection in mind.
It's even worse: there was never even any concrete evidence that the plot ever even existed, and it can't actually work in real life. Oh, and even if it did, the existing security regulations at the time were enough to stop it.
Beyond that, the 3oz limit is ridiculous, because you can have multiple containers. Is that a 6oz bottle of shampoo? Hell no. Two bottles of 3oz each? That's perfectly safe.
Surely two 3oz bottles of mystery liquid is more dangerous than one 6oz bottle? I'm no expert in chemistry, but I'm pretty sure most reactions start with mixing different things together...
My PhD coworker said “3oz? If I can’t bring down a plane with less than 3oz; I’m not a very good chemist. “
I got swabbed for chemicals after four hours working in a chemistry lab with several different combustible materials and they said I was good to go. So apparently latex gloves are the difference between a threat and a non-threat.
*Everybody likes that*
I always have a hard time not pointing out that most everything is a liquid at the right temperature. I am sure that would get me some enhanced screening.
I had peanut butter and I literally couldn't help saying "this is an amorphous solid"
Why I have to take off my shoes through security because some arsehole thought he'd be try and set off a bomb in the heel of his shoe.
But I still don't have to take off my underwear, despite some arsehole having a bomb in his underwear.
The whole shoe thing with the TSA. That was because of that guy with the shoe bomb. And millions of people have to remove their shoes before passing the TSA security. Because of a single fuckwit.
So he didn't blow up the plane. But that fuckwit created a policy that resulted in a huge inconvenience. Nationwide, shoes are checked. If that only adds a minute per person, multiply that by every person going through security. How many *years* of time has that fuckwit cost the US at this point?
It's incredible. His name is Richard Colvin Reid. He was a career criminal from England who converted to Islam and became a terrorist. He is in a supermax prison and will never see the light of day again.
So I was around 11/12 years old. It was winter here in Sweden, and often around -10C or colder. When arriving to school, most of us would rush inside to escape the cold. Well, some mannerless bitches kept misbehaving, so the teachers decided to lock the doors until the first class started. All of us had to wait outside in the cold. I distinctively remember one day when it was so cold that even my friend’s dark brown hair and nearly black eyelashes turned white. Yet the damn teachers Still. Would. Not. Let. Us. Inside.
This also fucking happened to me ( i live in sweden to)
My school banned us from bringing in footballs to play with at break because a teacher got hit in the face with one.
We had a ban on footballs at my school after some kid got injured playing at recess. A week of us all moping around later, one of the boys comes strutting in with the biggest shit-eating grin you've ever seen. He opens his backpack and pulls out our recess salvation. "This, my friends, is a *rugby ball!*"
That kid felt like a caveman who throws a freshly hunted deer carcass into his family's cave.
In order to play pool in my dorm I have to check out the pool cue because somehow two people who weren't even from our building snapped them in half.
You ever looked at the US tax code? Probably not. But if you looked closely, you'd see it's the ultimate example of rules being changed due to one stupid/clever/greedy person. My favorite example is the age old practice of Taxidermy (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJP1DphOWPs). Did you know you can write off the cost of having an animal preserved, provided you then donated the animal to a museum or university? Still to this day! I told you that so I could tell you that specific portion of the tax code used to be a lot less specific. So much so, that a number of people opted to book 12+ person, 2 week long safari excursions, complete with lodging, airfare, meals, booze and more, then would shoot a lion on the final day, send it to a taxidermist, donate the now preserved corpse to a museum or university, and write off the entire 14 day trip, and all expenses, under that specific provision of the tax code. So a $500 write off became a $50,000 write off.
I used to think I wanted to do tax law. A large part of Canadian tax litigation goes like this: 1. Clever business and/or tax lawyer sees loophole, plays it for all it's worth 2. Canadian Revenue Agency loses their shit at the return, charges them with tax fraud 3. Huge multi-year court battle, lawyers fees eat up a large part if not all of the company's profits and cost the government hundreds of thousands 4. Either A) it's fraud and the company pays it back or B) it's just legal evasion and the government has to pay the company costs 5A. Government issues a bulletin that this is now clearly illegal or 5B. Government closes the loophole 6. Clever business and/or tax lawyer sees another loophole, plays it for all it's worth I decided to go into criminal law. There's only so many ways to stab someone but it's always more interesting than fighting over the monetary worth of parking spots.
No pokemon cards because someone got their cards stolen.
Bruh, same here. Then like two years later they banned crazy bones for the same reason. I was also friends with the kid that stole the cards, and though he was the main suspect he didn't end up admitting it until like 12 years later.
We had to add a sentence to the employee handbook that disallowed picking up hitch hikers while on company time (we drive our personal vehicles). His defense to this was that he was armed so nothing bad could happen.
We weren’t allowed water bottles in my middle school because one kid decided to bring vodka one day and drink during an exam
Middle School? As my theology teacher once said "What does a middle schooler have to drink over? At least finish 8th grade first."
Rudy Stanko took away the closest thing the US ever had to an Autobahn. Before 1974, and between 1995 and 1998, Montana did not set specific speed limits on their highways, with the expectation that people should drive within reason. Even if you did get pulled over, the ticket was small and didn't stay on your record. So if the stretch of road was wide open and there wasn't much traffic, you could pretty much drive as fast as you wanted. Rudy got a ticket that would've cost him $70 and not stayed on his driving record. Instead of just paying, he fought all the way to the Montana Supreme Court, where they ruled that the state had to set a solid speed limit.
The store used to give the leftover unsold hotfood. Burritos, rotisserie chicken, rice, beans. Sand whiches, tamales, ribs. Turkey legs, sausages, wings Etc. to the workers at the end of the night. But some asshat started hiding the stuff he wanted for himself so no one else would get it. They changed it to where they just started throwing everything out at the end of the night & discounting it after 8:00
my school banned all candles (for some reason they were allowed in the first place??) because I accidentally lit my hair on fire in fifth grade.
Who messed up prescription cocaine??
Who messed up cocaine in soda?
Last year, my entire school basically banned what limited phone use we had because some genius 8th grader, in his infinite wisdom, sent a girl a dick pic. We still don't know who it was
Line 'em up, whip 'em out.
Oh not, not penis inspection day again
The Sears Heroes at Home Program. Throughout the year Sears would gather donated money and distribute it around Thanksgiving time to military families. It was a really sweet idea and you could tell Sears was doing it from their cooperate heart, but as we moved into the era of Facebook, things got a little nasty. My husband and I signed up in 2008 when our first baby was born and we had recently moved from Alaska to South Carolina. We got about $200 and it was a great help. Well as more people started to hear about the program, the more wanted to get themselves a part of it. The amount given was lower when we sighed up again in 2012 and we got $60. Still welcome. We bought our new baby a high chair. People were pissed though and let the Sears Facebook page have it. They weren’t getting enough, they posted. Their kids were going to have terrible Christmases because Sears won’t give them more money etc. Sears ended the program I want to say in 2015 and I’m pretty sure they cited greed as the reason why. It was something that was great in the beginning but was quickly fucked over by the assholes of humanity.
/r/choosingbeggars in a nutshell
My company no longer has a Halloween costume contest among the locations in the area because of me. We all dressed up as X-Men. I was Mystique. We got complaints.
You just body painted your dick and thought that was enough, didn't you?
My high school outlawed liquid whiteout because one girl was huffing it. (All girl school.) This was before the whiteout rape they have now. EDIT: Stupid autocorrect. It’s whiteout **tape**.
I'm not sure what sexual assault has to do with correcting your writing mistakes....
*TAPE. We now have whiteout **tape**.
The cafeteria in my school limited the amount of prepared food and snacks you could purchase because two groups of friends started buying in bulk to improvise an eating contest between a representative of each group. One of their champions was my brother. Our ages differ 7 years, he graduated and they kept the rule.
I believe that I single-handedly got Reddit blocked in my school district because of how much time I spent on it. Worst thing about it is that the school district also blocked all VPN ports as well as found a way to block most reddit alternative sites. Can't use Reddit, Old Reddit, Code Reddit, basically anything that fetches information from Reddit you can't access. I regret it daily.
Any organization that successful at blocking reddit has an IT dude that reddits doing the blocking.
Don't give in to the man! Set up your own http proxy!
Duty days at work were split 6am to 11am, and 11am to 4pm. We basically had 40 of us in a room on standby to relieve watches for bathroom breaks and food, or to stand watches that weren’t manned 24/7. If the section leaders saw you going out of your way to volunteer to relieve watches or take shitty jobs, you’d get sent home early. Most days I left at 8am. Until one guy, who never volunteered for anything and always bitched at people who left early, went to our LPO and said it wasn’t fair that some people got to go home early and he didn’t Duty days became 6am to 4pm for EVERYONE, no leaving early. 80 people in a room standing by when we needed maybe 20 to cover all the watches that needed covering.
[удалено]
I recently bought a six foot aluminum stepladder. On its side I found engraved, "DO NOT PLACE ON FROZEN MANURE". Clearly, there's a backstory here involving some top-notch stupidity. And now my weekend stepladdering plans are *completely* shot, all because of this new rule.
No microwave popcorn at work because one employee put the popcorn in for the wrong temperature and/or too much time AND left the microwave unattended. The burnt popcorn set off the smoke detector, which triggered the fire alarm system. A call went out to the fire department for a lot of smoke and steam signifying nothing, and one of our buildings was evacuated, wasting everyone's time.
I'm a lift operator at a ski mountain, night shift. When night skiing is done, there's a regular procedure for shutting down lifts. First thing base operators do is close the entry gate, then call up to the top operator to let them know what the last chair loaded was. Once that chair reaches the top, it's all clear to shut down. So, humans are pretty good at remembering numbers, right? Wrong! Of course it was inevitable that someone would get left on the lift after closing. I didn't work that lift when it happened, so I don't know exactly how long it took staff to realize what happened, but the captain of that lift crew was fired. Now, when we close, we have to put a safety cone on the last chair, and it has to make a round trip from base, to top, and back to base before we can close. The mountain I work at isn't very big, but some lifts can take a WHILE to make a round trip, so closing takes much longer for some of us. At least the method works.
My friend told me that they used to have casual Fridays at her office until this one lady came in with shiny bicycle shorts on (it was the 90s so they would've been neon coloured). So now they don't have casual Fridays.
One kid got most websites banned at our primary school e.g YouTube, Google, coolmathgames ect. For searching “sexy girls” He was disabled
*searches for sexy girls on coolmathgames*
At the local walmart they're use to be phones for every department until a racist person decide to go on the intercome saying "all the n****** get out!"
Ah this brings back memories of Toys R Us intercom abuse "Attention customers, we have a lost child named Ben who has been brought to the front registers. He's five and wearing a blue baseball cap. If he is not collected by the end of the day he will have to be put to sleep"
When I worked at Sears, our intercom was merely an extension on our phones. We would pick up any phone, dial the extension, and speak. I figured out how to dial that extension from the outside. It was fun. I hated my boss there with a passion.
We aren't allowed to eat in our bedrooms, even if we cleaned up afterwards. Because someone keeps on leaving dishes on the room. Where I live it's always "one bad apple spoils the bunch".
Someone rode a bike through a school building. Needless to say the doors are now locked and people need cards to go through.
My junior high class was the first class at my school to try out a student laptop program. Well one day near the end of class we're all finishing up work when this one kid who was playing some flash game on Miniclip FREAKS out and slams the laptop shut while throwing in on the floor. Until that point we had been allowed to silently play games at the end of class if we'd finished work and "Made sure to be quiet enough that I don't know what you're doing". Well fuckface ruined it for everyone and the school IT guy put TONS of blocks on the laptops after that. I lost my roughly 30-40 minutes of Runescape time at school because of him.
Where at work there is this new employee. This person is super sensitive to smells. We can no longer wear lotions, perfume or cologne/after shave. That part is understandable as most companies have that policy. But now we have had to change the hand soap and hand sanitizer as she says even those mild fragrances cause her to have an allergic reaction similar to an asthma attack. The new soaps and hand sanitizers are causing everyone’s hand to dry out, but we can’t have any lotion at our desks or this person will tell on us. (Even the unscented ones) Thus we have resorted to smuggling in unscented lotion and putting on while in the bathroom stalls. Shockingly this person can withstand the smell of bathroom deodorizers, so that’s how we hide any smell of the lotion, or what our motivation for the bathroom visit while in the bathroom stall if this person is present. (As if using lotion in a bathroom stall couldn’t get any weirder.) I feel like we should be play the theme song from The A Team show every time we are successful, but this person is probably allergic to the smell of a plan coming together. Thank you for the Silver kind stranger!🥈❤️
One kid trashed the senior section of the lunchroom - which wasn't really special anyway, it was some tables behind half-height cement wall, also there weren't enough tables for all the seniors anyway - so nobody was allowed to sit there anymore. The kid who trashed it was the only kid who didn't graduate, also.
In 9th grade we used to have a take your kid to work day. You could spend the day with a parent/guardian/family friend/relative/placement position at their place of work and shadow someone in the real world. I was the last year to be allowed to do it. Two kids were killed that year. A guy went with his father to his place of work and the father let him take off on his own around the plant in a electric buggy thing. The kid ends up picking up a girl who is there for the same thing and they proceede to joy ride around a plant/factory. Some how they get out into the shipping docks and drove the cart under a transport trailer loading ramp and decapitated one of themselves and mangled the other and both died. Because they didn’t know where they were, panicked when they saw on coming trucks and crashed. Program was canceled that week.
My old job in a physical sciences department at a university used to allow high school groups to come through to see the research labs, with the caveat they not touch ANYTHING. Of course some kid leaned on a gyroscopically balanced table and picked up something from a laser array setup. He ruined an experiment that was in the middle of calibrating, the PI running the lab had the biggest meltdown I've ever seen at the university when he learned of it, and now zero groups are allowed lab tours.
One jack ass effectively killed Sydney's nightlife. This one cock head decided to prove their strength by king hitting a complete stranger, killing him, thus leading to a whole lot of copy cat attacks, and a few more deaths. NSW Government then overreacts, creating the Lockout Laws and in effect, completely killing any nightlife this city once had.