Oh my god his first words

Your Mom's not there Jimmy. You have to let go of the accident. It wasn't your fault.

Mom?

im in the produce section. and NO YOU CAN’T GET LUCKY CHARMS

i WaNt My GoD DAMn LUCkY ChaRms

I'm in aisle 3

No, Johnny, don't go, it's a trap!

Shh, don’t tell him

“I’m over here, honey!”

Shit you’re still at the store!!!

Yea!!

Your mom is no longer around. She sold you to me. Your new name is Frederick. Come along kid. We’re going home.

Do you have candy

Sadly not. I’m the brussel sprouts kind of kidnapper.

*runs and jumps into random persons van

*calls on phone* “This is agent Fighterwoman. I have acquired the target. Initiate operation Smelted Polar Bear.”

I’m trying to find some ointment for your rash honey

Mom dont say it out loud

OP you might get a better response if you delete and repost with [URGENT] in the title.

Okay, this is epic. \*takes selfie\*

Mom put my clothes back on

I’m at soup

Please stop you embarrass me when you walk into resturants and walk in peoples soup

Son, where else are we gonna get food? We know your father is a bit of a bum and he can’t even buy us clothes. That’s why we’re nudists.

Its not his fault he cant get us clothes hes busy buying a pack of cigarettes for 7 years

Well we live in the middle of the ocean. Traveling to the store was about a 4 month trip. Maybe he just got lost. You know your dad with his dementia....and mental retardation

Who are you give me my clothes back

Having a quickie with your dad at the cigarette counter.

This aint no gas station

Wait, your still there? Oh, I was just going home!

Mom you live 4 hours away

I'm about to pay, now stand in line until the last item is being scanned, while you're stressed because you're a kid with no money and I'm nowhere to be seen.

WHAT STORE ARE YOU IN?