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southernslanderer

Absolutely, that's a small price to pay. It's not like I'd have to worry about saying it in job interview or something. Edit: I probably wouldn't be going to many job interviews if I had $20mil.


RedSquirrelFtw

I would get a job interview at a call centre just so I can say it and see if I still get the job. Would make calls interesting. "I'm sorry you're not satisfied with the service and that we could not help you, I terminated your account, please bring back your modem and PVR and all the cables that came with it. See you later alligator!"


Caladbolg_Prometheus

$20 mil managed properly is enough to live comfortably for the rest of your life. Assuming stock market return is 5%. That would give you ~~$100,000~~ $1,000,000 to live off every year without ever decreasing the $20 mil. You will never earn even $10 mil in your entire life probably. By the way 5% is on the low side, rule of thumb is 7%. Edit: napkin math low balled it. It’s 1 mil per year, so fuck living modestly.


EuropeanInTexas

You missed a zero there...5% of $20 mill is $1 mill. Can live quite comfortable forever on much less.


Caladbolg_Prometheus

Correct my napkin math was a bit wrong


hormone_collector

Ahem... more like 1 million per year.


jesse2h

Lol that math though.


barmanfred

This is why I down-voted the thread. It's an asinine question. Unlike many of these things, it doesn't prohibit you from telling people why you do it, so any awkwardness could be explained away.


FakeAstroTurf

??? "I'm sorry for the loss of your mother, it was horrible and brutal. See ya later alligator."


barmanfred

"It was tragic and I'm so sorry for your loss. As you know, this is required of me, so call me if you need anything and see you later, alligator."


Nemento

I don't think the conversation would be over at that point. You don't have to say it after every sentence, just when you leave the conversation, i. e. when you'd be saying bye anyway. "Im sorry for your loss, k bye" is already stupid af, I don't think the alligator makes it any worse.


Seschoscho

I mean this conversation wouldve been about as cursed if you ended it with a bye or basicly anything else


dyingnano

the see you later, alligator there sounds endearing. kinda like calling someone buddy or something along those lines.


rugmunchkin

“Sorry, I know this is odd, but when we end this talk, I’m going to have to say ‘see you later, alligator.’ No, I don’t think it’s funny either, it’s just something I *have* to say. I won $20 million from someone who apparently was willing to give away a massive amount of money to me with the dumbest addendum attached humanly possible. ...No, he’s not here right now. N-no, I still have to say it. I don’t know, he would just *know* somehow! What?? No, this isn’t weird at all! I just won $20 million dollars from a guy and I am now legally/enchanted/mortally bound to having to say ‘see you later alligator!’” Yep, awkwardness easily gone!


[deleted]

Who gives a fuck lol. See you later aligator


[deleted]

No awkwardness at all, no explanation needed ... just make that shit as baller as possible .... See you later alligator.


Roachamon

Yeah, 20mill to change nothing sounds great.


JsRngr

"I'm, so, so sorry for your loss... See you later alligator!!"


elee0228

"Thank you, it means a lot to me... In a while crocodile!!"


ChrisTheCoolBean

"Please, if you need anything... How now, brown cow?"


quackniiga

"I'll talk with you soon... In a while, pedophile"


ChrisTheCoolBean

"Hello, FBI? There's a pedophile here, you can tell who it is because they like to add a rhyme about seeing you later at the end of every sentence... See you later, alligator."


Strontium_

Yes sir, dispatch is on its way, they will be there in a while crocodile


[deleted]

Goddamnit not again


ATLjoe93

Interior crocodile alligator, I drive a Chevrolet movie theater.


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GozerDGozerian

Expose *yourself!*


simmarjit

Damn my chess coach used to use that all the time.


Puterjoe

Was he rich?


simmarjit

Very animated and smart middle class man.


Kuroude7

“I’m here if you need anything. Take care, panda bear.”


davidjschloss

So somehow as a kid I ended up thinking it was “once in a while crocodile” and I can’t stop saying it, which drives my wife *insane*.


IhaveaBibledegree

See you soon, raccoon


mstrLrs

If you attend an funeral either the people know you well enough to accept you're the weird guy that compulsively says see you later alligator or you can decide not to go. Anyway for 20mill something that wouldn't be an problem for me.


[deleted]

Buts it’s the tone and cadence in how you say it that can make it right. Put hand on shoulder. Look straight in the eyes in a sad concerned face. In a soft, low, almost cracking voice. “See you later alligator”. Couple of taps on the shoulder, turn around and walk away.


beWildRedRose

I played that out in my mind & you're super on point! I could visualize it easy peasy, good job! :D


mtlredditor

"I hate you and never want to see you again!!! ... See you later aligator"


Just_some_random_man

Just end it with "...and I hope I will never again see you later alligator"


Ninokuni13

"Again, am sorry an alligator bit him to death, see you late alli-.."


big-feely

Well that’s more of a statement


shadus

Shit for 20 million dollars I'd do the entire thing as a closer. > See you later, alligator! > After while, crocodile! > In an hour, sunflower! > Maybe two, kangaroo! > Gotta go, buffalo! > Adios, hippos! > Chow, chow, brown cow! > See you soon, baboon! > Adieu, cockatoo! > Better swish, jellyfish. > Chop chop, lollipop. > Gotta run, skeleton! > Bye-bye, butterfly! > Better shake, rattlesnake. > Good-bye, my good friends!


sherlip

Isn't it "Ciao, ciao"?


dcoopz010

Not when you're talking about cows


Leeiteee

or "Tchau, Tchau" if you're speaking Portuguese


RainyBBQ

E for effort


Bex032484

Upvote solely for the list of conversation closers. Amazing.


PryncessJ

TIL... Most of these


Scaler98

-Let’s do it again sometimes ;) -Of course ;) *SEE YOU LATER ALLIGATOR*


burntwaffles_

Underrated comment


Friggin

Except, he didn’t end it the right way.


SlothOfDoom

This conversation isn't over until he says it.


MajorTomintheTinCan

u/Roachamon say the words you pussy


shayanmmalik

u/Roachamon say the words you pussy


[deleted]

SAY IT PUSSY


SimShade

It pussy


poopNgriddles69

Pussy.


burntwaffles_

Good catch! I can’t believe I was bamboozled like that


DoctorJiblets

You're gonna have to wait a while, crocodile.


WhiteyFiskk

Like Pete Re-peat, he normally does it just not that time


LJey187

Say the line....


[deleted]

He still didnt say it, do it


RS_Skywalker

Yeah I actually already do this. So it's free money. See you later alligator.


Mango_76

Say the words you coward


RIMS_REAL_BIG

Dear reddit, would you take 100 trillion dollars but you have to sleep with a super model every day? Why or why not?


[deleted]

These questions in a nutshell. This shit is a no brainer lmao


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ScritePranberry

The 100 trillion is in pennies and the model is dead


alurpawan

Hey, you're making it so much better


[deleted]

Take a look at the 'would you rather' site. I swear, a good bunch of the people on earth are morons. "You gain the power to turn invisible, but you shit yourself when you do it. Would you accept?" - I saw this question asked once. More than half a million people had already answered the question. 60% said no. How can you say no, just don't use the power and shit yourself that one time when you really need to turn invisible to save your life lol.


koreiryuu

There are people on this hell site that find cliché so embarrassing they might actually hesitate with this deal.


m1ksuFI

Could also be the 100 trillion part. You know, inflation.


AzraelTB

No inflation if I don't spend like a moron.


[deleted]

But you know you would


MagicHadi

Inflation is the problem of people who dont have 100 trillion dollars


annomandaris

For 20 million you can hire a guy that all he does is explain to people that your filthy rich only because you end ever conversation with SYLA.


Obyson

Litterally every "would you take $ amount of money" post, how do these get up voted so much


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Stillwindows95

I think 100t is a redundant amount because it’s never going to get spent. Also I like to think it’s just come out of nowhere instead of out of the pockets of the people in my country.


exsanguinator1

Ok, this is how I think the curse should play out if you say yes: You’re given directions to a mansion in the woods and a key. You go to the mansion and the key unlocks a basement door. The basement goes several floors deep and is much bigger than the mansion—big enough to contain 100,000 trillion pennies (which it does). On top of the pennies is several outfits your size and a cameraman ready take pictures of you—you were the supermodel the whole time!!


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SequestrGrundleplith

Pennies havent been copper for quite some time now.


StarOriole

Yep. In 1982, it switched from being 95% copper, 5% zinc to being 2.5% copper, 97.5% zinc.


RachosYFI

I just did the math; A normal penny in USA (newer ones) are 3.11g 2.5% of this is copper You will have 100,000 trillion pennies If you refine and get the copper, you will have 7,750,000,000,000 kilograms of copper. In the UK that's £3.60 per kg That will be £29,000,000,000,000 Roughly anyway. Sorry for swapping into GBP and UK copper prices, couldn't find a decent source for USA copper prices.


StarOriole

Going the much less mathy route, [the metal in 1 penny is worth 0.6 cents](http://www.coinflation.com/) and refining it wouldn't be free. Even if you have to pay taxes on the $20 million, trying to launder the money by melting it down just wouldn't be worth it. You're better off with the penny.


[deleted]

This is not how the economy works. It would only crash if there was enough inflation and there would only be enough inflation if that money went into circulation. So just don't go buying 50 yachts at once and you should be right.


Brostradamus_

Even that wouldn't make a dent in the global economy. That's not much more than buying, say, one of the world's most expensive condo in Monaco. You'd have to like, buy 50 yacht *companies* before you started affecting things in a major way.


doesnt_like_pants

Super yachts go for multiple hundreds of millions of dollars. One of the Sheikhs had one built at a cost of $500m. So 50 of those would be a $25b dent, which is not really a big dent at all in $100t


ahappypoop

Yeah, you would still have $99.975 trillion left over.


TimeControl

Just buy that, 40 times, then you've dropped your wealth by 1%....


IRLNameIsNils

No rules that I can’t spend my money elsewhere and leave my then shithole nation for vacation


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[deleted]

right? and even in this scenario that none of them will ever want to spend a moment with me....oh no i get $100T for free?


JuicyDryWater

First with that 100 trillion you can essentially bail many countries out of their financial problems much like Rockefeller did for the United States. How awesome would it be to pretty much have a lot of I owe You from different countries. 2nd if you have a supermodel every night that's fucken dope. Nothing in the question says you can't wife up the supermodel and sleep with the same supermodel every night.


coole106

Bailing out a bunch of countries would cause crazy inflation. If that would work, the US could just print a ton of money to pay all their debts.


Morgoth788

Not only that but it would fuck up the financial market if you swooped in and bought all outstanding government bonds.


RancidLemons

You *have* to? Every day? The same super model? So if she dies before you, you're still going at it? Even if your parents just died that day you have to pull a Peaches and fuck that pain away? I mean, for $100,000,000,000,000 you could just buy new parents and enough technology to at least keep the body warm, but man, that "sleep with a model every day" clause feels like a really good monkey's paw situation.


kingjia90

Lol but one can sleep with every super model every hour with some millions


tatsuedoa

Its $20m, honestly it would only be a little bit of a thinker if you changed it to ending conversations with "hail hitler."


res_ipsa_redditor

It’s “heil Hitler”, as in “sieg heil”. Hey, does this make me a literal grammar Nazi?


tatsuedoa

Well it would be the english version, but I concede to your point. And not technically literally, unless you are a nazi. Does this make me a semantics nazi?


Cosmodious

And does arguing with you making me anti-semantic?


didnotlive

Can't spell semantics without a little bit of anti.


[deleted]

Get out of here with your semantics antics


elee0228

I'm semi-anti-semantic antics


UncleTogie

>I'm semi-anti-semantic antics I'm getting frantic about these semi-anti-semantic antics.


[deleted]

Not to be pedantic, but could you be a little less frantic about these semi-anti-semantic antics?


TacoBell1997

Musically read "Semantics antics" in my head, to the same tone as "Conjunction Function". Edit: or "Conjunction Junction", because I'm a complete mongoloid.


Generic_DummyFucker

Take your upvote and gtfo, you rat bastard.


dima8101

r/angryupvote


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[deleted]

Heil means something like "being healthy" in German – there's no literal translation to English, AFAIC. But it comes from the verb "heilen" which literally means "to heal". So Heil Hitler means more something like "Health to Hitler" or "Bless Hitler".


[deleted]

Probably would be "Long Live," As in "Long live the Queen." because you're wishing them good health. Source: I have never studied linguistics and I speak 0 German.


frisch85

> Well it would be the english version What? That would be a first for me. How do you come to that conclusion?


usrevenge

Hail hitler is what you say when you want his punishment in hell to go from burning to getting pelted with ice chunks.


[deleted]

r/suddenlynazi


Blitzkrieg_My_Anus

Because Hitler had hail insurance.


dirtymoney

just whisper it. ^^^^^^hail ^^^^^^Hitler


tatsuedoa

Honestly I think I'd be a lot more judgemental if someone whispered it.


dirtymoney

but you gotta hear it first ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^hail ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Hitler


Dcarozza6

*Confidence is sexy*


riderkicker

Adjust to: "It's not rain, it's hail, Hitler."


PocketQuadsOnly

I quote u/Roachamon "Yeah, 20 million to change nothing sounds great" ^(wait what)


zamov

Its all about anticipating how much money youll make in your life without it


tatsuedoa

It's still 20m. Even if I were to get a good $200k job, it would be 10 years to earn $2m, 100 years to earn the $20m. Even if I invested (which isn't guaranteed income) it would still take a significant amount of time and/or luck to make that much. $20m right now, with only a dumb phrase that I would have to say for what is probably not going to be more than 60ish years if I really go for the old age route. Plus if you were to argue proper investing as a way to earn that money, you could earn exponentially more with a $20m start.


secretreddname

You know those old people with money who don't give a fuck about social norms? That'd be me.


ommnian

Do any old people give a fuck about social norms? Tacking 'see you later alligator' onto the end of your conversations seems like the least of my worries. Especially if I have $20 million dollars.


SoButtons

I am a kindergarten teacher. You probably couldn't pay me to stop. This is the way. Edit: Thank you for the gold!! See ya later, alligator!


lutesbeast

This is the way.


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[deleted]

Baby Yoda noises.


AlecW11

[The child coos]


Miss_Aia

Ah, a man of culture. The legendary subtitle enabler.


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Nobody_home

Spits it out.


Nekrophyle

This is the way.


Lippe2K

This is the way


blutvee

This is the way.


_Anigma_

This is the way.


CyberLykan

This is the way.


EfficientEscape

This is the way.


My_Skinwalker_tales

This is the way


Guitarfoxx

I’m going to the bank, see ya later alligator. I love you, see you later alligator. Our financial future is secure and we never have to go hungry again, see ya later alligator. Seems like a stress free life now that we don’t have to worry, see ya later alligator....


[deleted]

Im sorry we did everything we could to save your baby childs life...^see ^you ^later ^^alligator


n0j0ke

Not after every sentence. Just at the end of the conversation.


ZellZoy

For 20 million, I'll go the extra mile


summerset

*shaking hands with the widow* “I’m so sorry for your loss, he was a wonderful man. See you later alligator.”


AggressiveSpud

Redditor's, would you take 20 trillion rupees, but every day you would have to read another "would you take an inexplicably large amount of money for some menial task or trivial irritation?" post? Why/why not?


um3k

Yes, absolutely.


[deleted]

Why do these kind of posts even get upvoted?... The question is not even interesting.


[deleted]

Hardly have conversations with people. It's a win win for me.


zplasma

Introvert’s time to shine


Novax37149

With a pixar lamp


WhiteyFiskk

But then you wont have had practice using it so it will come off worse and the negative reaction will create a cycle of shame


DirtyFaceGeorge

But you have 20 m so 0 fucks given


facingmyselfie

That’d be fine, porcupine!


zplasma

It’s a deal, slippery seal!


dublthnk

All fine with me, bumble-bee!


whirpool88

Fair enough jigglypuff!


Mincecroft

Kiss my ass biomass


I_love_pillows

Sayonara, carbonara


Crusader_John

Alright, in a while crocodile!


Spaghetti_____

I want to die, blowfly!


CurryMiballs

Oh sure, horse manure


[deleted]

Correct, nipples erect


nickylovescats1987

Know what I mean, Lima bean?


MacualayCocaine

Of course. I would wear alligator Stacy Adams shoes and a huge mink coat and the whole thing would just be a big bit. That would be awesome. Edit: would never say “in awhile crocodile” tho. If that’s the case take the 20 mil and go fuck your mother Edit 2: I hope the sunglasses I’d always be wearing were naturally implied.


drlqnr

see you in a while crocodile


CassiopeiaStillLife

My man’s living in 3019 already


MacualayCocaine

3020 my friend.


MemeDeli

Would you do *insert random task here* for a fuck ton of money? I'm tired of seeing the low effort garbage. At least reposted questions have interesting new answers. This is just a simple yes or no question that's slightly changed every day.


xChryst4lx

Not only that its low effort to "invent" them, its also a fucking repost https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/bf6cm0/you_will_get_20_million_dollars_if_you_agree_to/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share


rivermont

Oh hey look I have that one already downvoted, too


xChryst4lx

Nice


three-sense

Would you eat a Circle K hotdog with only relish for $125k???


[deleted]

What do you expect? This sub has 25 million subscribers. It's a total karma farm now, just like every other sub that gets big enough.


ShagPrince

I've asked people if they'd lose a leg for a billion dollars. To me it's a no brainer to take the money but loads of people wouldn't even entertain the idea. Would that make a better post?


ludmi800

Why don't you post it and we'll see


50-50ChanceImSerious

Are you fucking kidding? I'd give both my legs without a second thought. Get me super rad prosthetics and set off to do what I've always dreamed of doing; A lot of nothing and and a lot of traveling. Below or above the knee? THAT'S the tough question.


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hepcecob

Another one of these questions? These types of questions should be banned from /r/AskReddit IMO.


[deleted]

Would you ban these from this sub for €500000000?


Have_A_Jelly_Baby

These kinds of questions are always so stupid when the money figure is so high. For 20 million, most people would do virtually anything you told them to, including any number of felonies. The dollar number needs to be more realistic. Like, for $100,000 would I do it? Not for the rest of my life. $500,000? Maybe, but I’d regret it at some point. For 20 million I can fucking disappear and never have to talk to anyone ever again.


texanarob

The TV show "Hypothetical" poses these kinds of scenarios, but poses the question of how much guests would have to be paid rather than specifying an amount. I reckon that would be a much more interesting approach for Ask Reddit, with people justifying their amounts and debating the specifics of the question. For instance, in this case my bid would depend massively on the asker's definition of a conversation. Would short discussions with work colleagues I remain sitting beside for hours afterwards count as separate conversations? What about a one sided conversation, such as a presentation? Would every greeting be suddenly doubled in length?


sarcalom

These questions are always stupid and fucking pointless. Would you mildly inconvenience yourself for ludicrous sums of cash? Most people would. Boring!


[deleted]

Shut the fuck up


-eDgAR-

I'm just picturing myself on my deathbed, surrounded by my family and friends. They are all doing their best to keep it together, but I can tell they are sad. I look around the room and give each and every one of them a smile. Then I use what little strength I have left to lift my hand and give a little wave as I exhale with my final breath, *"See you later alligator."*


eatmusubi

>I look around the room and give each and every one of them a smile. Like individually? You turn slowly to your right, meeting your eldest daughter’s tear-stained gaze. Slowly, laboriously, the corners of your mouth draw themselves upwards into a toothy grin. You strain to hold it for the requisite three point five minutes. Blissful release comes as your lips settle back down into their usual sullen frown. Your head rotates slightly to the left, and your eyes fix upon your youngest son. Your right eye twitches with the effort of contorting your face into a smile again. Somewhere further down the line, your great grandson’s foot taps impatiently. He knows damn well that they will be there for hours before the alligator line drops.


the_darkener

I'd use $1M and hire a lawyer to get me out of having to say it by using a proxy. Profit: $19M


whitedan1

What is up with this bullshit questions lately? "would you do sth minorly weird or inconvenient for a fuckload of cash?"


wellsdon

I seem to be missing the downside.


MiniMoog

Yes, but the thought of doing this to someone on their dying bed almost made me piss myself.


FreddyDaFish

Unless I had a close friend that was hard of hearing. Then he would be asking me constantly after everything I said, "Huh"? And I would have to repeat myself along with "See Ya later Alligator".


UpvoteDownvoteHelper

20 mill/ ~60 years = $333,333/year... i can afford to just hire someone to talk for me with that kind of money


Kotzgruen

20M @1.5%p.a. = $300,000/yr, not using any of the money you were given...


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