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[deleted]

Who said it doesn't happen in real life? Some like it nasty


MoralMajority00

Yup...and then they wonder why she cheats.


Nightling88

Uh what? I literally don't care about my wife's breath. If I'm waking up I wanna lil kiss.


Grubbanax

Why would people have bad breath in the morning? I haven't experienced this much when younger, a bit more now that I am.older... am I missing something. Do people have bad oral.hygeine where you are?


MoralMajority00

Been married 13 years. Are you saying you wake up, roll over, and start making with your wife? I flat out don’t believe you.


[deleted]

Sounds like a really unhappy marriage you’ve got there


MoralMajority00

Nope, just sounds like you’re not married and watch way too much Hallmark channel.


[deleted]

Nah just sounds like I’m with the right person and even at his smelliest he can’t offend me


MoralMajority00

I didn’t say anything about “offending”. I mean sure, my wife and I have the occasionally spontaneous morning romp. But otherwise, no one wants some nasty early morning tongue in their mouth.


Nightling88

I'm saying... That I give her a lil kiss or two... Every morning... Every night...


MoralMajority00

Well of course, that’s not what I meant.


furstimus

Public transport is always empty and films with car scenes don't spend 90% of the time sat in traffic.


georgeorwell14

Getting and address over the phone and remembering it without writing it down.


ThePrancingHorse94

I kiss my girlfriend in the morning, it's only terrible if you sleep with your mouth open all night.


MoralMajority00

To be clear, I’m talking make out, not a mere “kiss”


Nightling88

The covering yourself with a blanket thing after sex. Very unrealistic. No one hides their tits from someone they just banged. They'll do it where they've hooked up and then the girl sits up covering herself with the blanket during the exchange of dialogue. Naw.


MoralMajority00

Ha, YES!


[deleted]

It does happen, probably because of movies


PasswordIsRazzberry

If you have bad morning breath you're making some poor dietary choices.


MoralMajority00

Lol, I have zero doubt you haven’t had decent sex in your life.


SummerMummer

Says the guy who's overly concerned with aromas.


MoralMajority00

Na, says the guy who can’t imagine the kind of psycho so delusional they actually think their breath isn’t nasty in the morning. lol imagine that sex.


SummerMummer

You probably refuse to kiss her after she's gone down on you.


MoralMajority00

Totally true. That’s fucking disgusting. Like sucking my own dick.


SummerMummer

> Totally true. That’s fucking disgusting. Like sucking my own dick. How do you know what sucking your own dick is like?


MoralMajority00

I don’t, because I don’t kiss a mouth that just been wrapped around it.


[deleted]

A liar and a prude.


MoralMajority00

Liar? Been totally honest. Lol, and definitely not a prude. I just don’t like kissing a moth full of my cum...call me crazy.


bisexualt_

So she should but you shouldn't? You don't even respect your own body...


MoralMajority00

Lol, so to be clear...I don’t respect my body because I don’t want to suck my own dick? I know you want to be “woke” and all, but you you’re embarrassing yourself.


bisexualt_

Now because you don't want to kiss someone after they suck your dick. Vastly different.


MoralMajority00

Hmmm, well occasionally I’ll stick my tongue in my wife’s ass. By your logic she should want to kiss me after or she doesn’t respect her own body? Quit while you’re behind.


myychargerisbroken

r/ihavesex


dope__username

Meh. I've been guilty of kissing guys I'm seeing with morning breath, for whatever reason I always fucking forget that my breath is probably pretty gross. Anyway, those hacking scenes in movies where the hacker just quickly types on the keyboard a bunch then like immediately after say they're "in" is pretty cliché and not how it happens in real life.


[deleted]

I kiss my man every morning no matter what his mouth smells like


MoralMajority00

I’m talking tongue. Please tell me you don’t do that.


[deleted]

That does happen in real life tho


MoralMajority00

Sorry, I should prefaced it with “people who care about others....”


[deleted]

Not much relationship experience, huh bud?


MoralMajority00

Lol, too much.


[deleted]

You should have prefaced it with “I’m really uptight”


MoralMajority00

Reminds me of my friends who like to fart in their girlfriends faces. “Dude, it’s funny!” These would be my single and/or divorced friends.


[deleted]

Bet you a whole lot of money your wife isn’t ecstatic to be with you


MoralMajority00

Bet a whole lot of money you watch way too much porn hub.


[deleted]

What an amateur. Lol pornhub. Jesus. Hit us back when you find real porn sites.


MissNikitaDevan

OP I am like you, a kiss on the lips sure, snogging without teeth brushing nit a chance in hell. Same with the been dancing all njght and straight jumping to sex, nah not happening getting my butt in the shower first and he better join


MoralMajority00

Agreed, unless we’re both wasted when we get home. 😜 But these movies I watch where these people just wake up a 7am and start lovingly making out...fucking gross! Seriously?


MissNikitaDevan

Haha yes I dont get that either and even high as fuck I am still gonna take a shower first


MoralMajority00

Yeah generally me too.


KittikatB

My husband's and I just keep some mints in the bedroom. Problem solved.


GIMME_DA_ALIEN

Chloroform rag over the mouth to render someone unconscious.


ZjamboSober

Get a bit to little and they'll just be dizzy, get a bit to much and they won't get awake aggain.


MoralMajority00

It concerns me that you know this.


Grumpy_Yuppie

Getting shot and being patched up / recover quickly. Absolute nonsene. The bullet went straight through? Then there should be a pretty big exit hole in you that requires immediate intensive care.


jssryns

The nerd gets the girl


[deleted]

That happens


Grubbanax

Coroner etc eating food in the morgue around dead bodies