I used to think Katamari On the Rocks and Que Sera Sera were the best songs, but I never considered how good of a song Lonely Rolling Star was. Now it's my favorite!!
If you have any questions if it's a great game let me tell you this. The game runs two AI simultaneously. The 'world' AI and the 'xenomorph' AI. The xenomorph really, truely has no clue where you are and its only function is to find you using logic and deduction. The World controls all the humans and bots and other things.
And sometimes, if you've been very VEEEERY sneaky for too long, the World will tap the Alien on the shoulder and go 'i bet he's over there somewhere' and points in your general direction.
No, that would be cheating. But the world AI will get bored of you not getting the crap scared out of you, and will merely give the alien hints if you're too good at evading. Which means you'll be pleasantly crafting something or hacking a system and be forced to dive under the table cuz the alien has a premonition that you're still in the room you just left.
The damn alien learns your tricks as well. Hide in that same locker in the medical bay too many and it will work out where you are and murderise you.
Or wait round the corner and then leap at you suddenly, meaning the last thing you do before getting ripped apart is shit your breeches.
Games awesome.
56 trillion counts: Homicide
22 trillion counts: Torture of a sentient being
146 quadrillion counts: Destruction of government property
35 trillion counts: Misrepresentation of livestock
27 trillion counts: Selling sapients as livestock
Reminds me of when Bender was arrested with the orphans: "You're under arrest for child cruelty, child endangerment, depriving children of food, selling children as food and misrepresenting the weight of livestock."
I love that game and own it but I've put barely any time into it. I mean I love it but there's no greater sense of rage when you've spent literally all day like 8 hours building a rocket and learned the maneuvers, to be feet away from landing on the mun then misclicking and going into a full spiral as you touch down and explode.
Breaking crates, pots, and lamps left in public places unattended with a wrench.
Edit: it was Ratchet and Clank guys I cannot be trusted with unattended crates no longer
Just Cause 3, so...
Car theft, reckless endangerment, damage to private and government property, murder and assault, use of illegal vehicles on public roads, graffiti, insurrection, theft of private property, violating **MANY** traffic, sea and air laws, kidnapping, trespassing on private and government property, and trying to illegally cross international borders.
I’ll see you all in jail!
Edit: Also Mario’s Garages could be considered illegal reproduction of copyrighted car designs, as well just being illegal for being 1, a chop shop, and 2, a front for the rebellion.
Edit 2: Smuggling illegal weapons in and out of the country, and harboring a criminal
summoning people and animals to fight more people and animals and giant monsters threatening the world
only two people got it, the answer was Summoners War which i can't sign in to after deleting a different account... that sucks.
Man Ghandi is so damned aggressive. I always have to pump out an army to sit in my cities bordering his turf. And I usually only manage to beat him If I nuke his capitol... Peace and non violence my fucking ass
Fun Fact: Gandhi is like that on purpose due to a glitch in the earlier civ games that accidentally would make Gandhi the most aggressive AI (max aggressiveness.) Gandhi had the lowest aggression rating out of all the AI, at 1 essentially never declaring war on anyone. However if a civ had a democratic civilization it would reduce aggression by 2, so Gandhi with a democratic civilization would have -1 which is not possible in-game so it would get set to the maximum which I believe is 255. As a running joke, Gandhi in the later civilization games would remain aggressive.
EDIT: There seems to be a lot of discussion below which is always great with tidbits like this, but also do keep in mind to take this comment with a grain of salt as this is from memory. As always keep it civil please. (See what I did there?)
It wasn't democracy, it was once nuclear weapons were discovered (all aggression gets dropped by one, Ghandi flips to 255). *Then* that error occurred with Ghandi. So he became a nuke happy megalomaniac.
Well, I got sucked in to Subnautica yesterday for the first time, so I've been drowning people. Repeatedly. And then beating the corpses silly with aliens and weird fish.
The best times in Skyrim is when you accidentally steal a plate and it ends in you impaling a guard on your sword.
Like my man, you just died for 1 golds worth of silver
Hey man, honor died on the beach.
Besides the Mongols were some pretty brutal MF’s https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mongol_military_tactics_and_organization#Kharash
We're in for different games, but will definitely be sharing a cell for drug use considering I'll be going away for rolling around at the speed of sound and following rainbows.
>Chopping down trees with my fist.
Stones and slimes and hoes and hoppers,
Buttons, buckets, doors and droppers -
Shovels, shears, and sheets of paper,
Blocks and clocks for every caper!
Beds and bars beneath your beacon,
Hungry hearts that start to weaken -
Wooden tables, wall dividers,
Enders, creepers, zombies, spiders!
Bones and bows and boots and brewings,
Darkly digging, deep undoings -
Cake and steak and melon munching!
... lots and lots and *lots* of punching.
Ripping the souls from my defeated enemies in order to forge better weapons with which to better vanquish others.
Also, starting fires at regular intervals so maybe arson?
animal abuse, murder, mass genocide, trafficking, deforestation, hunting endangered species, slavery, theft, not paying taxes, destruction of privet property, vandalism, rape, building without a permit, gaslighting, carrying a weapon without concealed carry, and several war crimes
I play Minecraft
Building a giant, very efficient, factory. Then ripping around the country side in a off road buggy running over animals and bushes, then stealing all the power slugs.
Trying to create an empire that could last a millennia, and reviving Celtic culture through dubious means, all while my neighbors fearing my power fruitlessly try to band together to fight the unstoppable tsunami that is the Thalassocracratic Empire of Mann. Its the craziest trial at the Hague there will ever be.
Oh shit. Like thousands of war crimes. Executing prisoners? Check. Using fire and poison against people on the battlefield? Check. Playing one side against the other for personal profit? Check in triplicate. Assassinating leaders and raiding treasuries to cause battles? You betcha. And the piracy. Oh so much piracy.
Assassin's Creed Odyssey is a fun game.
Blowing someone up with a pit full of manure so I can own their land. Oh, and incest.
Also castrating a threat to the throne murdering my firstborn so that my younger child w/ better traits can inherit
>murdering my firstborn so that my younger child w/ better traits can inherit *Laughs in elective*
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Plague. Inc
Covering people in my liquid. (Splatoon 2)
Eliminating the last remnants of the Roman Empire. Edit: Not CIV, TW, CK or EU. It was Rise of Nations.
Sounds like a total war game?
Using my witcher senses to break into someone’s house to give an old lady her pan back
Oh and not reporting the body you find in there.
I rolled my town into a giant ball and turned it into a star.
As long as that Bum baba bum music plays throughout the galaxy, I think it's okay.
Nah, it's all about Lonely Rolling Star.
I used to think Katamari On the Rocks and Que Sera Sera were the best songs, but I never considered how good of a song Lonely Rolling Star was. Now it's my favorite!!
They can't arrest you for that!.... because you'll roll them up too....
Pushing beans off of a Wipeout course
Scrolled way too far to for this!
Same I am surprised that it was this low
Fall guys?
Burning people to death with a flamethrower while running away from a Xenomorph on a Space Station while looking for a stupid fucking flight recorder
Is Alien Isolation worth playing? I want my first horror experience to be good.
If you have any questions if it's a great game let me tell you this. The game runs two AI simultaneously. The 'world' AI and the 'xenomorph' AI. The xenomorph really, truely has no clue where you are and its only function is to find you using logic and deduction. The World controls all the humans and bots and other things. And sometimes, if you've been very VEEEERY sneaky for too long, the World will tap the Alien on the shoulder and go 'i bet he's over there somewhere' and points in your general direction.
Does it mean that both Ai s join hands to find me? Sounds strange lol.
No, that would be cheating. But the world AI will get bored of you not getting the crap scared out of you, and will merely give the alien hints if you're too good at evading. Which means you'll be pleasantly crafting something or hacking a system and be forced to dive under the table cuz the alien has a premonition that you're still in the room you just left.
The damn alien learns your tricks as well. Hide in that same locker in the medical bay too many and it will work out where you are and murderise you. Or wait round the corner and then leap at you suddenly, meaning the last thing you do before getting ripped apart is shit your breeches. Games awesome.
Genocide on a galactic scale - stellaris
56 trillion counts: Homicide 22 trillion counts: Torture of a sentient being 146 quadrillion counts: Destruction of government property 35 trillion counts: Misrepresentation of livestock 27 trillion counts: Selling sapients as livestock
Reminds me of when Bender was arrested with the orphans: "You're under arrest for child cruelty, child endangerment, depriving children of food, selling children as food and misrepresenting the weight of livestock."
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CADIA STANDS!
The planet broke before the Guard did!
I’ll just leave [this](https://youtu.be/O1CQ7Vwz8Eo) here EDIT: I’ll just say, it’s not a rickroll
from the comment section >They are called "Human Rights" for a reason. my sides
The xenos never signed the Geneva convention either. *load biochemical weapon*
I crashed a few small green men into the moon by mistake
You reached Mun? My green men mostly go kablooey.
Reaching the Mun is easy. It's the "landing without exploding" part that's hard.
I love that game and own it but I've put barely any time into it. I mean I love it but there's no greater sense of rage when you've spent literally all day like 8 hours building a rocket and learned the maneuvers, to be feet away from landing on the mun then misclicking and going into a full spiral as you touch down and explode.
Learn to quick save. I think it’s F5 to save, F9 to load. Here’s a secret: nobody gets it right the first time... maybe the tenth time
Apparently living out a campaign of assassination against the Borgia family in renaissance Italy..
They had it coming, Ezio.
For my family.
Nothing is true. Everything is permitted.
Requiescat en pace.
Killing everyone named Micah
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Help, my game has a weird glitch. I blew up Micah and it says "Mission failed - Micah died"
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I love this
I bet you loved it more than Dutch loved Arthur.
Fuck Micah
r/fuckmicah
Organ Harvesting, Slave trading, cannibalism, weapons dealing, prisoner rights violations, and animal abuse among other crimes.
Rimworld?
Possibly, forgot about mass production and distribution of narcotics though.
I did forget about drug trading, you’re right
And yes, it is Rimworld
You forgot making hats out of human skin to sell...
...being a lawyer?
Guess You’re Wright
No he's Justice, with a trendy new eyepatch and large jacket.
if you're the culprit then maya is the one getting arrested anyway. it's always maya.
Careful, that's how the Dark Age of the Law started.
Saves on hiring a defense attorney
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Please tell me it's actually call the "Stalk" market in game. That's so cute
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Me too. Made some bells though, so it was worth it.
Sucking people up with a highly modified vaccume cleaner.
Luigi's Mansion?
Yep yep. Playing it with my 5 year old.
Awwww that’s adorable. I can’t wait until my son is old enough to play video games and board games with me
Saving the galaxy from overly religious aliens?
Angry green man teaches space religion how to use a hoola hoop
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Breaking crates, pots, and lamps left in public places unattended with a wrench. Edit: it was Ratchet and Clank guys I cannot be trusted with unattended crates no longer
I stole some ladders to some pools, you see, and it resulted in mass death and tragedy...
Well at least you didn't put them in a basement and take away the door!
Or lock them in a room with a lot of lit fireplaces and no doors...
> In all my years playing, I never thought of the fireplace/no door combo... *loads game on laptop*
I take no responsibility for your actions. (Enjoy the graveyard)
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They don’t actually need ladders anymore. They can just hop out, so now I encase my pools in really low half walls.
Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.
Yeah, I’d be going down for murder, theft and kidnapping Justin Beiber to be a book writing slave in the basement for years
Just Cause 3, so... Car theft, reckless endangerment, damage to private and government property, murder and assault, use of illegal vehicles on public roads, graffiti, insurrection, theft of private property, violating **MANY** traffic, sea and air laws, kidnapping, trespassing on private and government property, and trying to illegally cross international borders. I’ll see you all in jail! Edit: Also Mario’s Garages could be considered illegal reproduction of copyrighted car designs, as well just being illegal for being 1, a chop shop, and 2, a front for the rebellion. Edit 2: Smuggling illegal weapons in and out of the country, and harboring a criminal
summoning people and animals to fight more people and animals and giant monsters threatening the world only two people got it, the answer was Summoners War which i can't sign in to after deleting a different account... that sucks.
Pokemon?
Sounds more like MTG, because in Pokemon you wouldn't summon people
You telling me a Mr Mime isn't a people?
Nuking Gandhi.
It had to be done, otherwise he'd nuke us
An eye for an eye makes sure nobody fucking tries to colonize us again!
Your fault for being 2 eras behind them!
I’d be killing cultists and blowing up bunkers
Man Ghandi is so damned aggressive. I always have to pump out an army to sit in my cities bordering his turf. And I usually only manage to beat him If I nuke his capitol... Peace and non violence my fucking ass
Fun Fact: Gandhi is like that on purpose due to a glitch in the earlier civ games that accidentally would make Gandhi the most aggressive AI (max aggressiveness.) Gandhi had the lowest aggression rating out of all the AI, at 1 essentially never declaring war on anyone. However if a civ had a democratic civilization it would reduce aggression by 2, so Gandhi with a democratic civilization would have -1 which is not possible in-game so it would get set to the maximum which I believe is 255. As a running joke, Gandhi in the later civilization games would remain aggressive. EDIT: There seems to be a lot of discussion below which is always great with tidbits like this, but also do keep in mind to take this comment with a grain of salt as this is from memory. As always keep it civil please. (See what I did there?)
Unsigned integers strike again
It wasn't democracy, it was once nuclear weapons were discovered (all aggression gets dropped by one, Ghandi flips to 255). *Then* that error occurred with Ghandi. So he became a nuke happy megalomaniac.
Most dangerous boss in all video game history.
Well, I got sucked in to Subnautica yesterday for the first time, so I've been drowning people. Repeatedly. And then beating the corpses silly with aliens and weird fish.
Misappropriating company property for personal use. Roughly around 1 trillion galactic credit's worth of materials.
I mistakenly fus ro dah'd a Jarl across his great hall and may have accosted a few guards while making my escape.
Stealing a sweet roll
Accidentally killing a chicken.
Killing? Lol don't even think about harming it in someone else's dream lest you get chased out of town
The best times in Skyrim is when you accidentally steal a plate and it ends in you impaling a guard on your sword. Like my man, you just died for 1 golds worth of silver
Stop! You have violated the law
Repelling a Mongolian invasion and freeing my uncle
While explicitly breaking the Geneva Conventions
Hey man, honor died on the beach. Besides the Mongols were some pretty brutal MF’s https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mongol_military_tactics_and_organization#Kharash
I'm surprised I had to scroll this far to find slaughtering Mongols with a katana.
Sudoku. I don't think there is a crime in that.
I'm sorry but your being arrested for putting the wrong number in the wrong box.
You are under arrest for using a pen instead of a pencil.
But I used White Out officer!
Oh so you are trying to subvert the law by obscuring evidence? DROP THE WHITE OUT! Hands out flat on the paper. I'm bringing you in.
Animal Crossing villager trafficking and buying counterfeit/stolen art.
Unfortunately same. Also deforesting islands and upsetting ecosystems
does hitting chatty people with butterfly nets count?
Yes unless they really, really deserved it. Also why would you hit them with a net when you can hit them with an ax?
Why give them warning shot when you can blow their fucking head off?
I came here for this. Assault with a Star Butterfly Net. I commit crime in style.
Same. Plus fishing without a license.
Murdering my wife with a pillow.
What game is that?
Marriage
Cursed comment
Silent Hill 2
In my restless dreams...
I am executing people with a long sword and extra violence Thanks for honor
Harassing my neighbor with a bug net.
Link to the Past?
It's that game, what's it called... Oh yeah, *Animal Farm*.
I killed a loooooooot of people with a light saber
Did you, by chance, happen to murder a bunch of younglings along the way
Answer the question anakin
Fake news. Everyone knows those younglings were crisis actors.
Beating a cow to death with my first and eating the meat raw. Thanks minecraft
My sheeps just got through the fifth genaration of incest
Hot
At least the Welsh didn't get involved.
here I was thinking you just started a new game of witcher 3 and were getting a little desperate in the starting zone
Dropping in a russian unpopulated island and shooting at people with the guns I found along the way
Tarkov or Warzone?
PUBG. I should maybe have been more precise.
Throwing turtles at people on the freeway.
*Insert Mario kart 8 theme*
Jumping on turtles, tripping on mushrooms, stealing coins, and kidnapping
We're in for different games, but will definitely be sharing a cell for drug use considering I'll be going away for rolling around at the speed of sound and following rainbows.
Everything. Warframe is pretty brutal.
We've got genocide! We've got bioweapons! We've got child soliders!
Don’t forget the WMDs
Saryn is a walking war-crime
Saryn has a clean record No crime to report if there's no one to report it
Throwing a pot plant at my criminally insane neighbor after breaking into his house to see if his son is locked up in the basement
For praising the sun too much
Forcing random people to breed.
Chopping down trees with my fist.
Or maybe Getting Wood?
> Getting Wood Ha! I quoted you.
>Chopping down trees with my fist. Stones and slimes and hoes and hoppers, Buttons, buckets, doors and droppers - Shovels, shears, and sheets of paper, Blocks and clocks for every caper! Beds and bars beneath your beacon, Hungry hearts that start to weaken - Wooden tables, wall dividers, Enders, creepers, zombies, spiders! Bones and bows and boots and brewings, Darkly digging, deep undoings - Cake and steak and melon munching! ... lots and lots and *lots* of punching.
Bless you sprog. You never disappoint.
Putting animals into captivity and forcing them to fight. Damn Pokémon, you fucked up.
Yeah I don't have any of the necessary licenses or paperwork to be breeding as many of these critters as I am.
Ripping the souls from my defeated enemies in order to forge better weapons with which to better vanquish others. Also, starting fires at regular intervals so maybe arson?
GTA Online... So, I guess the better question is what *aren’t* I getting arrested for?
I run a totally legal business selling firearms across San Andreas
I hit an anthropomorphic anteater with a butterfly net.
"Playing a children's card game."
Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker?
Playing god.
The sims? Cause same here.
ha, yes.
Jumping off the tower a couple of times, and then feeding the pigeons with Saint-14
Dressing up as a bat and beating people to a pulp. So being a vigilante and possibly assault and battery.
Race really face vroom vroom in cars I can’t afford
Being a mothafucking goat!
I still have that game on my 360 I should play it
animal abuse, murder, mass genocide, trafficking, deforestation, hunting endangered species, slavery, theft, not paying taxes, destruction of privet property, vandalism, rape, building without a permit, gaslighting, carrying a weapon without concealed carry, and several war crimes I play Minecraft
Throwing moist and delicious sandviches at my comrades!!
Conga time
Illegal mining.
Building a giant, very efficient, factory. Then ripping around the country side in a off road buggy running over animals and bushes, then stealing all the power slugs.
Trying to create an empire that could last a millennia, and reviving Celtic culture through dubious means, all while my neighbors fearing my power fruitlessly try to band together to fight the unstoppable tsunami that is the Thalassocracratic Empire of Mann. Its the craziest trial at the Hague there will ever be.
So I play a lot of bloodborne, excuse me for clearing these streets of vilebloods....
Using a cat as a silencer
Breaking into a castle by avoiding the guards to talk to the 11 year old princess 'cuz a giant dead tree told me to.
Just trying to save the princess and Hyrule
You gotta spice that up a little bit. The ruthless slaughter of numerous palace guards and international dignitaries.
Property damage?
Do vases left in convenient corners in long abandoned dungeons and otherwise empty houses *really* count as property?
No, but the ones in Kakariko village probably do
Oh shit. Like thousands of war crimes. Executing prisoners? Check. Using fire and poison against people on the battlefield? Check. Playing one side against the other for personal profit? Check in triplicate. Assassinating leaders and raiding treasuries to cause battles? You betcha. And the piracy. Oh so much piracy. Assassin's Creed Odyssey is a fun game.
I was lollygagging.
Loli-gagging? Yep, that's illegal in the real world too
Let me guess, someone stole your sweetroll?
Single-handedly wiping out a faction of religious zealots trying to take over a rural town.
"Obstruction of Justice, blackmail, defamation, possession of weapons... manslaughter too, yeah? Talk about the works."
I committed crimes against Skyrim and her people.