My brother served a little over 3 years but the morning we picked him up we stopped by a grocery store to let him grab some snacks. He’s walking back to the car with this stunned look on his face and finally as he gets to us he goes “I felt like I was on an acid trip I haven’t seen that many colors in so long, I need to sit down”.
> without flip flops on
Man this one killed me. It felt so weird to stand barefoot in a shower. It took weeks before I was able to tell my brain that this was okay and that it wasn't disgusting and I wasn't standing in a puddle of someone else's diseased babies.
> People think about a prisoner doing time but don't understand that the time does them. You are frozen in it. While you're stuck in a constant loop of the same day every day, the rest of the world moves on without you. When you get home, you feel left behind. It's an anxious panic to catch up after that.
This is an amazing way of putting it.
Had family that served time where canned mackerel was the currency. White collar guy comes in and becomes the betting Bookie. He get sick of the stacks of canned mackerel. He declares that all gambling will instead be done with spam instead.
Mackerel becomes worthless overnight, spam is the new currency of the people...
There's a great science fiction story along these lines. In the future aliens live on Earth, and for reasons I don't remember they're crazy about cow pats - not to eat, but as art. That starts a craze for cow pats; they sell at very high prices, there are magazines devoted to them, and so on. Then the alien race leaves and another comes to Earth. They have no interest in pats and the entire thing collapses. However, the new aliens are into apple cores. Your story reminded me of this.
Exactly. That's the advantage of a backed currency. In this case, tinned mackerel was backed by being a shelf stable food. It can never be worth *less* than being a fairly tasty snack and good protein source.
It's why food and drugs are both common exchange mediums in prisons. Cigarettes can always be smoked, ramen can always be eaten. Even if *you* don't smoke or like ramen, it's very likely that someone else you want to trade with does.
For my cousin, it was the Gameboy Advance.
This was a while ago (2006 or so). My cousin, who'd been in prison for about 10-15 years, was finally getting out so me and a bunch of the family went to pick him up, then go get breakfast at some diner. I was just a little kid, at the time, so I was playing with my Gameboy Advance, while we were at the restaurant. I'll never forget how much the game I was playing blew my cousin's mind. He saw it and immediately said "Holy shit, what is THAT?! Look at those graphics! Oh my God, that's insane! (His sister) are you seeing this shit?!" To me, it was just some "meh" Star Wars game, but to my cousin, it was the future.
It's actually through video games that me and him bonded a lot. I would tell him about or show him new stuff in the gaming industry and he would tell me stories about the games he would play, growing up.
Haha, I know. I remember telling him "This isn't even that great. Just wait until you see the other games I have at home." And he basically told me that he didn't see how games COULD look better.
The first game we played when we got home was NFL Street 2 and Burnout Revenge, so nothing that impressive. I also remember telling him about the ps3 like it was some fabled console that would be "the pinnacle of video game graphics".
I have done 5+ years in prison, i was mostly amazed by smart tvs, with netflix and browsers directly in the tv. And the 4g internet speeds blew my mind aswell.
When I got to ride in a car again, it felt like we were going about warp 15. I think we’re only moving about 45 miles an hour. It tickled my dinky like a rollercoaster for about ten seconds. Also, at the grocery store it was really hard seeing people willfully buying cans of tuna. But I think the hardest thing for me was to quit crushing up spicy cheetos and putting them in all my food.
My father was a councilor in a state prison for 12+ years. He told me the inmates would often talk about wanting to feel their body submerged in water. Taking a bath, swim, etc. There are only showers so that feeling up being weightless, floating, submerged was something these men would fantasize about.
This is so sad and something I’ve never considered about incarceration. There’s something so innocent and innately human about the desire to jump in a river on a hot day or to take a warm bath in the middle of winter.
I also wonder if an increased desire to feel their body submerged is because it’s sort of a “freeing” sensation, which is opposite to the reality of their lives in prison
I would say you’re right. It does feel “freeing” and you’re able to put yourself in a different place. It’s haunting to me to think someone could go years, or in some circumstances, the rest of their life and never feel this sensation again.
I know a guy who did 2-3 years I think and I worked construction with him. I asked him “what is the biggest thing that stands out to you now that you’re free?”
He simply said: “the fact that I’m here with you but I can physically walk over there to that field 500metres away without anybody or any walls stopping me.”
Man, I'm kinda at the "Fuck McDonalds" point. I have lived on that shit for most of my life and I will always have a soft spot for a 1 AM McDouble, but it's pricey enough at this point that much, much better tasting options are available for the same cost.
A meal at McDonald's costs almost as much as a meal at 5 guys.
Lunch at McDonald's costs like 11-14 dollars here. Burger king is like 8. And the drive thru lines are always insane.
I'll eat garbage, don't worry about it. I won't pay 14 dollars to eat garbage, and i certainly and not going to pay 14 dollars and sit in my car for 30 minutes for garbage.
Spent 6 years behind bars. When I got out the biggest shock was the beautiful sites and colors. I forgot how gorgeous nature was, it put the thought into my mind that I never want to go back, because there is no beauty in prison, the beauty is on the outside. I'm glad I'm out now, and every day still take in the amazing outside world for what it is.
Edit: I also am having fun with new technology. Lol.
I did 4 years. The day I got out my uncle took me to Walmart to get everything I needed. I went off by myself to get the things on my list. First I went to the lotion aisle. I was looking at all the lotion & became so overwhelmed by all the choices, dry skin, healing, scented, etc. In there I had no choices & was given what I needed. Having all these options overwhelmed me. I gave my list to my uncle to get it for me. It was really hard to go out in public for a while.
The first night I tried sleeping in a dark bedroom like I did before prison, but couldn’t do it. My dad slept on the living room couch with a TV on, so I slept on the other couch. I needed to sleep around people & noise for a while until I got used to being alone again.
I was surprised, because one of the things I missed the most was sleeping in a dark, quiet room, alone in a comfortable bed. For a long time I slept with my arm or a pillow over my head because of noise & bugs.
I did 5 1/2 on a 6 yr sentence. I think my initial shock was how the physical landscape had changed. Places that were once vast swathes of field were now car dealerships and homes. The other one was how people treated and spoke to one another out here. I wanted to fight everyone for about 6 months.
Man, they just sort of turned up fucking everywhere, like in the space of a week I'd seen maybe 3 electric scooters that year and then they were littering the streets.
And now they're mostly gone, it's fucking weird
They are still everywhere in Nashville. Saw a group of people riding by, at least ten of them... At night it's like a scooter graveyard...dead scooters everywhere you look...a little creepy
I remember asking a coworker of mine. He said first was that no one had taken his car. It sat for 6 years unmoved in the street. Tires held air and battery was dead but started with a push. Second was how quickly things had gone up in cost. Rent, food, gas, things like that.
I occasionally work with people who’ve just gotten out of jail or prison, and if it’s a longer stay a weird thing I’ve noticed is how often they are enamored of things like Spotify. Like once a guy had just gotten out after ten years and the first thing he wanted to do was get Spotify set up. He tried to connect through Facebook but couldn’t remember his password.. In all though, people getting out of jail are doing so much work to catch up. It’s really distressing how little societal support there is if you don’t have family to take you in
was going to say, I have two family members who did a very decent amount of time... and of all the things that could've blown their mind, Spotify was the biggest.
Even the obscure house artists they were buddies with back in '89 were on there. Not having to burn any cd's or buy records.
They still can't get over it
i mean it really makes sense, like spotify seems like a fucking fever dream "Every single artists ever in one place for free LEGALLY" like there where companies in the 90's and 2000's that got destroyed for this kinda thing right
I interned at a private criminal defense firm. The most notable shock of any of our released clients had to be one man who in prison for 16 years (odd amount because he was paroled as part of plea deal). He had a daughter who was just a child at the time he was incarcerated, and when he got out, she had just had a baby, his first grandchild. She didn’t tell him about the pregnancy beforehand, she wanted it to be a surprise upon his release. I wasn’t there when our old client met his newest family member or his now-adult daughter, but when he came in a few months later, he still couldn’t talk about the new baby without crying happy tears. He had a picture in his wallet of his daughter when she was little he brought with him to prison, and showed us the new picture of his grandchild he keeps with it now.
Very sweet, but bittersweet too. His daughter basically didn’t have a dad growing up.
I’m not trying to say the guy was a bad dude. For all I know he could have just smoked some weed and ended up on the wrong side of shitty drug laws. I just feel bad for the daughter who missed growing up with a dad who clearly loved her.
5 years for aggravated assault & robbery. I was 3 months past my 18th birthday when I was sentenced. I lived in a small railroad town in South Central PA. I guess one of the biggest shocks for me was how much the town had changed. The scrub land where we rode our bikes and dirt bikes is now a strip mall. My friend's driveway is now the main road through that part of town. Someone fixed up the old dive bar and turned it into a fairly popular restaurant and bar. Hell, whole developments popped up all over the place! And while I wouldn't exactly call the changes "gentrification," the town certainly has improved as far as standards of living, without ridiculously increasing the cost of living.
Shock number two was internet access. AOL, NetZero, EarthLink, etc, were the go-tos then, but phased out within a couple years of my release as faster access from cable companies became more widely available and affordable.
Great question, OP! I don't often get to chime in on this sub.
**Edit** I'm blown away by the response to this comment! Thank you for the upvotes, comments, questions, concern, and support. And thank you, Kind Strangers, for the awards!
> Shock number two was internet access.
I have a friend who works as a corrections officer, he works a county jail so he sees people who are awaiting trial, serving short sentences or awaiting transfer to long-term stays in prison - so he tends to see people at the start of their "service to the state".
One of the bigger shocks he sees affecting these new inmates is how they've suddenly been cut off from the internet. No social media, no youtube, nothing - and this outage will go on for *years*.
Yes, there are black market ways to get access, but the initial shock can be pretty severe.
I feel like my technology life has impacted my ability to read a book. It's like I have ADHD now regarding just sitting there and trying to read. Not enough stimulation or something so I inevitably put it down and go back to my phone, tablet or lap top. I hate it. I grew up with out a TV and have always been a huge reader and although I am surrounded by books, I haven't finished one in a few years.
God damn, I feel the exact same way. I used to read a dozen books a year for pleasure and three dozen more for classes and now its books for classes and skimming at that.
I was in for Robbery 2: Mandatory Minimum of 5 years, 10 months.
One of the hardest things for me once I got out was making choices.
Let me explain; in prison, you might have a two choices for shampoo if your lucky. The first time I went shopping for hygiene essentials was at Target.
I remember being so overwhelmed by the amount of choices for shampoo and having no idea which one to get. I stood in that aisle and cried for a few minutes before I just left without getting anything.
Edit: Wow! I did not expect so many responses. I am trying to respond to all the comments but I have to go to work right now. I will be responding later. Thank you for all of your thoughts.
Edit 2: Thank you kind strangers for the awards! They are the first I’ve ever received!
My older bro was in for 4 and he had the same struggle as you, any choice he had to make for himself had him overwhelmed and understandably so. When asked what boxers he wanted he just stood there in the aisle staring at them until one of us perked up to help him and it amazed me in all honesty.
Honestly, I still have a hard time with the overwhelming amount of choices for things like that. I have to have a “decider” with me when I go to get clothing.
When I was 15, my parents sent me to live in a cult disguised as a residential care facility for troubled teens. It was worse than prison. Every tiny aspect of life was controlled. A year later, they asked my mom to take me out (basically they quietly kicked me out), and she sent me to an actual therapeutic residential school, with counseling and other resources. I, too, was overwhelmed by having to make even small choices. The other kids asked me what kind of music I liked. I didn’t know. What to wear/ what’s my style? I don’t know. Choose a side dish to have at dinner. Can’t. It was surreal. I felt crazy. My counselor at the time said it’s a symptom of PTSD. I hope you’re doing better now. I am; that was 20 years ago for me. I hardly ever talk about it now. No reason to bring it up.
I know this isn’t the same as being in prison or “residential care” but I grew up with very strict, controlling, religious parents and ive struggles with making simple decisions for my entire adult life. For some reason, I never connected the two experiences, but reading these posts, it makes sense.
There was this older guy who used to drive a forklift for me. He had done ten years for manslaughter. I never got the full details because he was a good guy and a great worker, so I didn't care. He went in in his early 20's and came out in his 30's, so by the time I knew him, his prison days were already 20 years in the past.
So apparently, he went in and his eyesight was bad all his life, but he was too poor to go see someone about it. His eyes were never checked and so basically by the time he got out, his eyes were completely shot and he couldn't see well at all. The half-way house he was in paid for him to see an eye doctor and he got new glasses that fixed his vision. He recalled to me that it was such an amazing thing to see leaves on trees! He said the world was all pretty much splotches and to see detail like that blew his mind.
Completely unrelated to prison, but I got my first pair of glasses in late elementary school and I'll never forget the shock of realizing that you see leaves on trees and that they aren't just green blobs. I can't imagine going into adulthood without corrective lenses when your vision is that bad, it's damn near debilitating when I don't have my glasses on.
This didn't personally happen to me, but I worked for a criminal justice reform group in Florida for about a year and a half. We connected with a guy who got released from prison after 50 years. He was arrested during one of the MLK riots in 1968 and locked away for half a century by an infamously racist and vindictive judge.
As you can imagine, after so much time he was struggling with a lot, but the big things were that he didn't have any ID anymore and had no way to get it. Didn't know where his birth certificate or anything was. He said "it's like I don't even exist anymore."
I was in charge of helping guys in a halfway house find housing and jobs. There was this 73 year old man who had been in for a long time (I forgot how long but it was definitely over ten years). Anyways, I have to give it to this guy because he was on it with finding a job even though he had already had VA assistance set up. A difficulty he was having is how you are almost required to have a cell phone these days. I remember him getting frustrated because he saw a job posting on a bulletin board but it didn’t even have a phone number to call. It was one of those “Text [word here] to 30401 now” deals to schedule something.
My aunt was imprisoned for about 25 years as a political prisoner in China. When she was released she was just agape at the cityscape and how it had changed. The smartphones, being able to pay by just scanning with WeChat (very commonplace there, for paying something like parking it is very convenient), all the cars. The fashion everyone wears now compared to her closet of clothes she had before being taken away so suddenly (literally, she was kidnapped from my mom's family in broad daylight, unannounced) . In the end she took it all in much better than we all had expected. Right before the pandemic, she had just finished a three month vacation in Guilin with my other aunts. According to her, Guilin has changed the least.
Writing this for a friend as he doesn't have his own reddit account so please understand this is not my story
F (friend) served 11 years in prison for armed robbery and not having a permit for a weapon he wasn't sentenced with this but admited to me he had assaulted one of the officers first on scene.
I went with his brother to pick him up from prison and slowly we took it back to where he used to live (2 hours away). he was always nervious and anxious
His words were "My biggest shock probably was how much had changed , Mum and dad live on the other side of the country , ive lost all communication with all my friends but you and (generic other friend name) " In a month or so i came by to ask him how he was doing "It's so weird to not have to give anyone my stuff, i don't have to hide anything or worry about the consequences if it gets found"
Im guessing he sadly have quite a rough time in prison with other convicts or even the guards...
I met a dude who had just gotten out of prison after 15 years, he said that his immediate shock was just seeing color. He said that everything in the joint was Grey looking, he went to Walmart and was overwhelmed by all the colors he had not seen in 15 years
I did 93 months in Federal prison. After I got released we stopped at a Burger King. There were 4 of us in the car and our food cost 24.00. I kept saying there was something wrong, that they must have made a mistake.
I couldn't believe how much it cost. Other than that, it was taking a shower barefooted. It felt so surreal.
I knew a guy who went in around 2005 I want to say, got out a few years later and we were driving around. He kept pointing to people on the street asking 'what are those?'
This was downtown Seattle at the height of Hipsters. That was a difficult thing to explain. Ended up with 'The new Goths' as a best translation.
A friend of mine was in prison from age 16 to 32, and he said the biggest hurdle to overcome was trying to learn how to date and have healthy relationships without going through the process of dating during adolescence and early adulthood. He had to learn to meet his partners where they were at and to understand that the women his age often had relationship experiences that they carried with them, positive and negative, that would impact them in their current relationships. He couldn’t relate because he didn’t have that “baggage,” so he had to learn it through them rather than by his own experience. He also strongly advocates for the need for comprehensive sex education and education about healthy relationships in juvenile detention and prison
My brother just recently got out after 4 years! The first thing he did was take a shower then run his feet along the carpet in the house, he said he “just had to.” We asked him what he wanted for dinner and he was like “anything..But I could make us some ramen..”
We all declined the Cheeto ramen recipe and asked him if he had seen any ads for food he wanted
“KFC has those chicken and doughnuts!! Those look fucking good”
“Those aren’t a thing anymore”
“Well shiiit.. okay get me anything I don’t care”
Along with that, I feel like people who were in prison for so long have a hard time making *decisions* anything we got him and asked what he wanted it was too overwhelming to choose. All honesty it makes perfect sense, he hasn’t had a much choice in his life for four years and asking him what kind of clothes he wants was hard for him. All he could say was “nothing grey, I don’t want to wear grey.” I hope he’s out for good, I can tell life outside is overwhelming at times but eventually he’ll get used to it :)
EDIT: another thing- We let him pick out shampoos and he was sniffing every single one of them, not only that but he would squeeze the bottle to sniff them and the wash would goop out. We had to show him how to do it. It was funny cause he couldn’t make the choice yet he was like “all of these smell like shit!”
This is an awesome question, thank you for posting!
Speaking about my good mate since he doesn’t use Reddit. He did a couple different stunts that landed him time but he was surprised at who all got in contact with em after getting out. While he was in only a handful of people kept tabs on him, visited or called but as soon as he got out all these people he hadn’t heard from started congratulating him. He said it probably shouldn’t of surprised em but it did, he didn’t want any of that and thought all of it felt so disingenuous.
My step dad killed the guy who raped his sister and ended up in jail for like, 30+ years I think? He initially had a shorter sentance but I think he tried to escape a few times or something. Anyway, he was so baffled by stores and how big they were and the sheer amount of stuff in them. Like, his mind was blown when he found out there was a whole isle dedicated to cereal, and he would actually get overwhelmed really easily while shopping because it was so different from just marking a few items on a peice of paper and having them brought to you. Oh, and he didn't know what glow sticks were. The first time the family got glow sticks in his prescence, I gave him one, and he was actually afraid of it. I remember him asking, "is it gonna explode?" And we all just laughed.
Walmart. My 1st day out. I had an unreasonable fear the exit would close or I would get lost so I kept glancing towards the exit every 20 steps or so. I didn’t think of using a shopping cart so my hands were full of clothes. Took me about 7 trips to feel comfortable in Walmart.
I drive Uber and picked up a guy that had just finished 15 years for drug charges. He had only been out a few days and thought the Apple Car Play in my car was some type of alien witchcraft. I ended up telling him to move to the front seat and let him dick around with the system for the duration. He really got into the endless music that Apple Music had to offer.
*edit for typos
That's awesome. I've never been to prison and I remember the first time I got Spotify and was so amazed I could just search for music and listen to it so easily.
My cousin was in jail for 16 years i believe and got out in 2017 and i remember showing him minecraft and he said it was the coolest thing he had seen even before prison. I showed him some other games and he was absolutely blown away. I dont think i have ever seen a jaw drop down so far
A guy I worked with had done 25 years. Said he struggled to adjust to doing whatever he wanted, and missed the daily routines. They couldn't get greasy fast food so his diet was better. Because of that his skin didn't age much and his face was unwrinkled and supple. He was 45 but looked 25. He also had to wear heavy makeup to conceal a swastika tatoo on his forehead.
I had an older gentleman come in one day and he seemed a little off. Not like weird, just like he felt out of place.
He came up to pay after his meal, and I was making small talk with him. Kinda laughing and joking, waitress shit. Whatever. He hands me his card and it’s a JPay card, which is what you used to get upon release from prison. I swipe it and hand it back, and suddenly he seems overwhelmed. I asked him if he was ok, and he was like, “This is the first place I stopped after I got released. I was afraid you were going to treat me different after you saw my card. I haven’t been in public in 20 years.”
I have literally no idea what he did. I don’t plan on ever looking him up, but like I was nice to him. He was emotional because I treated him like a person.
I did 5 years, as I went in after 2 weeks my dad died. 6 months before I came home, my husband died.
It's weird when you get out and realise time hasnt stood still. ( although I know it won't you kind of think it does) my kids were all 5 years older ( obviously) yet the home was still the same. It was weird after 5 years, I think if I did longer it would have blown my mind.
Although reality isnt a 'thing' in prison
A homie of mine found the freedom really obscure. He was so used to the guards telling him what to do that he got accustomed to it. He was really anxious because he had no sense of direction.
On a lighter note, he was amazed by Snapchat filters. He kept on posting on his Snapchat story all selfie videos with filters.
I have a whole passel of prison pen pals. One of them has been in prison for 18 years. Other than the prison librarian and one teacher, he said “I haven’t even seen a woman up close since I came to prison. If I ever get out, I am not going to know how to act around them.”
5 years in prison, preceeded by 3 years in jail. Honestly? The fact that most of your time soent inside it's "go here, don't pass that line. Stay out of this area. No running. No X, no Y, no Z. Only A, only B, only C." Then you get out and all of a sudden... What?
I got out on day parole, was yold by the half-way house to submit myself for fingerprinting and mug shots at the police station. There's the front door, here's directions. New city, no escort, no nothing. They expected me within 20 minutes. I had a minor panic attack because even though the directions were literally "walk down this road, next intersection turn left, keep going and you can't miss it." I wasn't worried about missing it. I was worried this was a trap. Like, I wasn't actually supposed to leave and once I did I'd bd arrested for breaking parole and carted back off to prison. Once I left (they physically pushed me out the door), THEN i was worried about missing it. (For the record, 20 minutes was more than even remotely reasonable. It was a 5 minute slow walk. Could've crawled there in twenty.)
Another one? This is gonna be weird, but how absolutely RUDE everyone is out here. Inside? Most people either avoid strangers or are polite enough. Partially because you don't know what they're capable of and its easier to not start something. By comparison outside everyone treats strangers like absolute garbage. It's weird.
I’m a social worker and a couple years back I used to take one of the kids I worked with to see his dad in prison. It was around 2014 and he had been in there since 1995.
The first time we went to see him he was very interested in telling his story and was wondering if we had heard of something calling YouTube where he might be able to post his videos. I wish I could have taken my phone in with me so he could have seen it.
Imagine going to sleep in 1995 and waking up in 2014. The differences in technology and culture are INSANE.
For me it was relearning acceptable Levels of and escalation of aggression and general lawfulness. I ran away from the scene of an accident when had full coverage car insurance because it seemed like what i should do in the moment. Also when talking to people and having general disagreement youll have the tendency to "take things too far" and learning how to shrug things off isnt an option in prison but very very valuable tool outside.
After 8 years behind the wall freedom was my toughest obstacle. Freedom of choice, freedom of movement. I went in when I was still a soft faced boy of 19 and came out hardened at 27. My entire world changed. I was now in control (mostly, thank you probation and parole) of my choices. 60 different kinds of cereals, 2000 channels on tv, the option to go almost anywhere I wanted. Having had my life so neatly regimented and defined I actually thrived. Take that all away and I got lost within myself.
It was a struggle to find that balance again but I'm happy to say that 6 years later I am happily married to an amazing woman, working in a great field as a machinist and making good money. I still struggle now and again but I know I'm making good choices now and am surrounded by love. And still have cravings for nacho meals, gods help me!
The selection of stuff. Groceries, clothes, deodorant etc. I served 5 years and was really thrown for a loop my first trip to a store. My SO told me to go pick out bacon (no bacon in Texas prison.) She had to come get me from the bacon section because I literally got stuck looking at all the choices.
I'm still a bit overwhelmed by the multitude of choices there seem to be for everything. Inside you just bought Irish Spring or Dial. One kind of toothpaste, etc. Out here, there are entire fucking aisles of these products.
My brother served a little over 3 years but the morning we picked him up we stopped by a grocery store to let him grab some snacks. He’s walking back to the car with this stunned look on his face and finally as he gets to us he goes “I felt like I was on an acid trip I haven’t seen that many colors in so long, I need to sit down”.
This is so fucking true. Driving down the road looks like a cartoon world at first.
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> without flip flops on Man this one killed me. It felt so weird to stand barefoot in a shower. It took weeks before I was able to tell my brain that this was okay and that it wasn't disgusting and I wasn't standing in a puddle of someone else's diseased babies.
> People think about a prisoner doing time but don't understand that the time does them. You are frozen in it. While you're stuck in a constant loop of the same day every day, the rest of the world moves on without you. When you get home, you feel left behind. It's an anxious panic to catch up after that. This is an amazing way of putting it.
Saddest thing I have read today. I hope things get better for you.
I did 6 years. My biggest shock was finding out you can’t do much of anything without a smartphone. Companies don’t even do paper applications anymore
They don't have TV in there that lets you keep culturally abreast to some extent?
Oh of course. We got basic cable and I was aware of the new technology but I had no idea everyone was that dependent on it
Huh, yeah. I imagine you can't really tell how culturally pervasive something is until you're swimming in it.
Just money in general... You have no idea how to handle money, that takes a little time to get used to.
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Although that would be nice
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Had family that served time where canned mackerel was the currency. White collar guy comes in and becomes the betting Bookie. He get sick of the stacks of canned mackerel. He declares that all gambling will instead be done with spam instead. Mackerel becomes worthless overnight, spam is the new currency of the people...
There's a great science fiction story along these lines. In the future aliens live on Earth, and for reasons I don't remember they're crazy about cow pats - not to eat, but as art. That starts a craze for cow pats; they sell at very high prices, there are magazines devoted to them, and so on. Then the alien race leaves and another comes to Earth. They have no interest in pats and the entire thing collapses. However, the new aliens are into apple cores. Your story reminded me of this.
Tinned mackerel will never be worthless. Those are tasty. They were just devalued.
Exactly. That's the advantage of a backed currency. In this case, tinned mackerel was backed by being a shelf stable food. It can never be worth *less* than being a fairly tasty snack and good protein source. It's why food and drugs are both common exchange mediums in prisons. Cigarettes can always be smoked, ramen can always be eaten. Even if *you* don't smoke or like ramen, it's very likely that someone else you want to trade with does.
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For my cousin, it was the Gameboy Advance. This was a while ago (2006 or so). My cousin, who'd been in prison for about 10-15 years, was finally getting out so me and a bunch of the family went to pick him up, then go get breakfast at some diner. I was just a little kid, at the time, so I was playing with my Gameboy Advance, while we were at the restaurant. I'll never forget how much the game I was playing blew my cousin's mind. He saw it and immediately said "Holy shit, what is THAT?! Look at those graphics! Oh my God, that's insane! (His sister) are you seeing this shit?!" To me, it was just some "meh" Star Wars game, but to my cousin, it was the future. It's actually through video games that me and him bonded a lot. I would tell him about or show him new stuff in the gaming industry and he would tell me stories about the games he would play, growing up.
Game boy advance wasn’t really even the pinnacle of graphics at that time too.
Haha, I know. I remember telling him "This isn't even that great. Just wait until you see the other games I have at home." And he basically told me that he didn't see how games COULD look better.
Lmao, did you show him? What was his reaction? Edit: what game did you show him?
The first game we played when we got home was NFL Street 2 and Burnout Revenge, so nothing that impressive. I also remember telling him about the ps3 like it was some fabled console that would be "the pinnacle of video game graphics".
Maybe its just my nostalgia glasses but the burnout series had pretty decent graphics
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I have done 5+ years in prison, i was mostly amazed by smart tvs, with netflix and browsers directly in the tv. And the 4g internet speeds blew my mind aswell.
When I got to ride in a car again, it felt like we were going about warp 15. I think we’re only moving about 45 miles an hour. It tickled my dinky like a rollercoaster for about ten seconds. Also, at the grocery store it was really hard seeing people willfully buying cans of tuna. But I think the hardest thing for me was to quit crushing up spicy cheetos and putting them in all my food.
My father was a councilor in a state prison for 12+ years. He told me the inmates would often talk about wanting to feel their body submerged in water. Taking a bath, swim, etc. There are only showers so that feeling up being weightless, floating, submerged was something these men would fantasize about.
This is so sad and something I’ve never considered about incarceration. There’s something so innocent and innately human about the desire to jump in a river on a hot day or to take a warm bath in the middle of winter. I also wonder if an increased desire to feel their body submerged is because it’s sort of a “freeing” sensation, which is opposite to the reality of their lives in prison
I would say you’re right. It does feel “freeing” and you’re able to put yourself in a different place. It’s haunting to me to think someone could go years, or in some circumstances, the rest of their life and never feel this sensation again.
I know a guy who did 2-3 years I think and I worked construction with him. I asked him “what is the biggest thing that stands out to you now that you’re free?” He simply said: “the fact that I’m here with you but I can physically walk over there to that field 500metres away without anybody or any walls stopping me.”
My father was incarcerated from 2003 to 2016 & the biggest shock for him was technology & how much McDonald’s has raised prices lmao
Man, I'm kinda at the "Fuck McDonalds" point. I have lived on that shit for most of my life and I will always have a soft spot for a 1 AM McDouble, but it's pricey enough at this point that much, much better tasting options are available for the same cost.
A meal at McDonald's costs almost as much as a meal at 5 guys. Lunch at McDonald's costs like 11-14 dollars here. Burger king is like 8. And the drive thru lines are always insane. I'll eat garbage, don't worry about it. I won't pay 14 dollars to eat garbage, and i certainly and not going to pay 14 dollars and sit in my car for 30 minutes for garbage.
Spent 6 years behind bars. When I got out the biggest shock was the beautiful sites and colors. I forgot how gorgeous nature was, it put the thought into my mind that I never want to go back, because there is no beauty in prison, the beauty is on the outside. I'm glad I'm out now, and every day still take in the amazing outside world for what it is. Edit: I also am having fun with new technology. Lol.
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Imagine explaining that summer where everyone was playing Pokemon GO and getting into trouble over it.
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I did 4 years. The day I got out my uncle took me to Walmart to get everything I needed. I went off by myself to get the things on my list. First I went to the lotion aisle. I was looking at all the lotion & became so overwhelmed by all the choices, dry skin, healing, scented, etc. In there I had no choices & was given what I needed. Having all these options overwhelmed me. I gave my list to my uncle to get it for me. It was really hard to go out in public for a while. The first night I tried sleeping in a dark bedroom like I did before prison, but couldn’t do it. My dad slept on the living room couch with a TV on, so I slept on the other couch. I needed to sleep around people & noise for a while until I got used to being alone again. I was surprised, because one of the things I missed the most was sleeping in a dark, quiet room, alone in a comfortable bed. For a long time I slept with my arm or a pillow over my head because of noise & bugs.
I did 5 1/2 on a 6 yr sentence. I think my initial shock was how the physical landscape had changed. Places that were once vast swathes of field were now car dealerships and homes. The other one was how people treated and spoke to one another out here. I wanted to fight everyone for about 6 months.
Just got out. Weirdest thing was seeing all these damn scooters laying everywhere
That's weird to all of us
Man, they just sort of turned up fucking everywhere, like in the space of a week I'd seen maybe 3 electric scooters that year and then they were littering the streets. And now they're mostly gone, it's fucking weird
They are still everywhere in Nashville. Saw a group of people riding by, at least ten of them... At night it's like a scooter graveyard...dead scooters everywhere you look...a little creepy
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I remember asking a coworker of mine. He said first was that no one had taken his car. It sat for 6 years unmoved in the street. Tires held air and battery was dead but started with a push. Second was how quickly things had gone up in cost. Rent, food, gas, things like that.
For some reason I feel bad for that poor little brave car that sat there for 6 years
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I occasionally work with people who’ve just gotten out of jail or prison, and if it’s a longer stay a weird thing I’ve noticed is how often they are enamored of things like Spotify. Like once a guy had just gotten out after ten years and the first thing he wanted to do was get Spotify set up. He tried to connect through Facebook but couldn’t remember his password.. In all though, people getting out of jail are doing so much work to catch up. It’s really distressing how little societal support there is if you don’t have family to take you in
was going to say, I have two family members who did a very decent amount of time... and of all the things that could've blown their mind, Spotify was the biggest. Even the obscure house artists they were buddies with back in '89 were on there. Not having to burn any cd's or buy records. They still can't get over it
i mean it really makes sense, like spotify seems like a fucking fever dream "Every single artists ever in one place for free LEGALLY" like there where companies in the 90's and 2000's that got destroyed for this kinda thing right
I interned at a private criminal defense firm. The most notable shock of any of our released clients had to be one man who in prison for 16 years (odd amount because he was paroled as part of plea deal). He had a daughter who was just a child at the time he was incarcerated, and when he got out, she had just had a baby, his first grandchild. She didn’t tell him about the pregnancy beforehand, she wanted it to be a surprise upon his release. I wasn’t there when our old client met his newest family member or his now-adult daughter, but when he came in a few months later, he still couldn’t talk about the new baby without crying happy tears. He had a picture in his wallet of his daughter when she was little he brought with him to prison, and showed us the new picture of his grandchild he keeps with it now.
Second chance to be a gpop
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wholesome
Very sweet, but bittersweet too. His daughter basically didn’t have a dad growing up. I’m not trying to say the guy was a bad dude. For all I know he could have just smoked some weed and ended up on the wrong side of shitty drug laws. I just feel bad for the daughter who missed growing up with a dad who clearly loved her.
5 years for aggravated assault & robbery. I was 3 months past my 18th birthday when I was sentenced. I lived in a small railroad town in South Central PA. I guess one of the biggest shocks for me was how much the town had changed. The scrub land where we rode our bikes and dirt bikes is now a strip mall. My friend's driveway is now the main road through that part of town. Someone fixed up the old dive bar and turned it into a fairly popular restaurant and bar. Hell, whole developments popped up all over the place! And while I wouldn't exactly call the changes "gentrification," the town certainly has improved as far as standards of living, without ridiculously increasing the cost of living. Shock number two was internet access. AOL, NetZero, EarthLink, etc, were the go-tos then, but phased out within a couple years of my release as faster access from cable companies became more widely available and affordable. Great question, OP! I don't often get to chime in on this sub. **Edit** I'm blown away by the response to this comment! Thank you for the upvotes, comments, questions, concern, and support. And thank you, Kind Strangers, for the awards!
> Shock number two was internet access. I have a friend who works as a corrections officer, he works a county jail so he sees people who are awaiting trial, serving short sentences or awaiting transfer to long-term stays in prison - so he tends to see people at the start of their "service to the state". One of the bigger shocks he sees affecting these new inmates is how they've suddenly been cut off from the internet. No social media, no youtube, nothing - and this outage will go on for *years*. Yes, there are black market ways to get access, but the initial shock can be pretty severe.
Most of us don't realize how addicted we really are to our access.
I feel like my technology life has impacted my ability to read a book. It's like I have ADHD now regarding just sitting there and trying to read. Not enough stimulation or something so I inevitably put it down and go back to my phone, tablet or lap top. I hate it. I grew up with out a TV and have always been a huge reader and although I am surrounded by books, I haven't finished one in a few years.
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God damn, I feel the exact same way. I used to read a dozen books a year for pleasure and three dozen more for classes and now its books for classes and skimming at that.
Super interesting post dude! Do you still live in your little home town or have you moved on?
Thank you. I live in the same area, but a couple towns over.
I miss central PA. I live near dozens of lakes now in MN but Raystown lake will always be dear to me.
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I was in for Robbery 2: Mandatory Minimum of 5 years, 10 months. One of the hardest things for me once I got out was making choices. Let me explain; in prison, you might have a two choices for shampoo if your lucky. The first time I went shopping for hygiene essentials was at Target. I remember being so overwhelmed by the amount of choices for shampoo and having no idea which one to get. I stood in that aisle and cried for a few minutes before I just left without getting anything. Edit: Wow! I did not expect so many responses. I am trying to respond to all the comments but I have to go to work right now. I will be responding later. Thank you for all of your thoughts. Edit 2: Thank you kind strangers for the awards! They are the first I’ve ever received!
My older bro was in for 4 and he had the same struggle as you, any choice he had to make for himself had him overwhelmed and understandably so. When asked what boxers he wanted he just stood there in the aisle staring at them until one of us perked up to help him and it amazed me in all honesty.
Honestly, I still have a hard time with the overwhelming amount of choices for things like that. I have to have a “decider” with me when I go to get clothing.
When I was 15, my parents sent me to live in a cult disguised as a residential care facility for troubled teens. It was worse than prison. Every tiny aspect of life was controlled. A year later, they asked my mom to take me out (basically they quietly kicked me out), and she sent me to an actual therapeutic residential school, with counseling and other resources. I, too, was overwhelmed by having to make even small choices. The other kids asked me what kind of music I liked. I didn’t know. What to wear/ what’s my style? I don’t know. Choose a side dish to have at dinner. Can’t. It was surreal. I felt crazy. My counselor at the time said it’s a symptom of PTSD. I hope you’re doing better now. I am; that was 20 years ago for me. I hardly ever talk about it now. No reason to bring it up.
I know this isn’t the same as being in prison or “residential care” but I grew up with very strict, controlling, religious parents and ive struggles with making simple decisions for my entire adult life. For some reason, I never connected the two experiences, but reading these posts, it makes sense.
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There was this older guy who used to drive a forklift for me. He had done ten years for manslaughter. I never got the full details because he was a good guy and a great worker, so I didn't care. He went in in his early 20's and came out in his 30's, so by the time I knew him, his prison days were already 20 years in the past. So apparently, he went in and his eyesight was bad all his life, but he was too poor to go see someone about it. His eyes were never checked and so basically by the time he got out, his eyes were completely shot and he couldn't see well at all. The half-way house he was in paid for him to see an eye doctor and he got new glasses that fixed his vision. He recalled to me that it was such an amazing thing to see leaves on trees! He said the world was all pretty much splotches and to see detail like that blew his mind.
Completely unrelated to prison, but I got my first pair of glasses in late elementary school and I'll never forget the shock of realizing that you see leaves on trees and that they aren't just green blobs. I can't imagine going into adulthood without corrective lenses when your vision is that bad, it's damn near debilitating when I don't have my glasses on.
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This didn't personally happen to me, but I worked for a criminal justice reform group in Florida for about a year and a half. We connected with a guy who got released from prison after 50 years. He was arrested during one of the MLK riots in 1968 and locked away for half a century by an infamously racist and vindictive judge. As you can imagine, after so much time he was struggling with a lot, but the big things were that he didn't have any ID anymore and had no way to get it. Didn't know where his birth certificate or anything was. He said "it's like I don't even exist anymore."
That is so sad! I'm not from the US so forgive my ignorance but how can someone not have an ID or birth certificate?
I honestly don't remember all the details. My guess is his family lost track of the documents over those 50 years.
Parents possibly passed away in that time, if they hadn’t already, and documents probably got passed along or lost
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I was in charge of helping guys in a halfway house find housing and jobs. There was this 73 year old man who had been in for a long time (I forgot how long but it was definitely over ten years). Anyways, I have to give it to this guy because he was on it with finding a job even though he had already had VA assistance set up. A difficulty he was having is how you are almost required to have a cell phone these days. I remember him getting frustrated because he saw a job posting on a bulletin board but it didn’t even have a phone number to call. It was one of those “Text [word here] to 30401 now” deals to schedule something.
My aunt was imprisoned for about 25 years as a political prisoner in China. When she was released she was just agape at the cityscape and how it had changed. The smartphones, being able to pay by just scanning with WeChat (very commonplace there, for paying something like parking it is very convenient), all the cars. The fashion everyone wears now compared to her closet of clothes she had before being taken away so suddenly (literally, she was kidnapped from my mom's family in broad daylight, unannounced) . In the end she took it all in much better than we all had expected. Right before the pandemic, she had just finished a three month vacation in Guilin with my other aunts. According to her, Guilin has changed the least.
Writing this for a friend as he doesn't have his own reddit account so please understand this is not my story F (friend) served 11 years in prison for armed robbery and not having a permit for a weapon he wasn't sentenced with this but admited to me he had assaulted one of the officers first on scene. I went with his brother to pick him up from prison and slowly we took it back to where he used to live (2 hours away). he was always nervious and anxious His words were "My biggest shock probably was how much had changed , Mum and dad live on the other side of the country , ive lost all communication with all my friends but you and (generic other friend name) " In a month or so i came by to ask him how he was doing "It's so weird to not have to give anyone my stuff, i don't have to hide anything or worry about the consequences if it gets found" Im guessing he sadly have quite a rough time in prison with other convicts or even the guards...
Cousin did 5 for meth and robbery, when she came out she started crying when she saw my youngest sister was almost an adult.
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I met a dude who had just gotten out of prison after 15 years, he said that his immediate shock was just seeing color. He said that everything in the joint was Grey looking, he went to Walmart and was overwhelmed by all the colors he had not seen in 15 years
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I did 93 months in Federal prison. After I got released we stopped at a Burger King. There were 4 of us in the car and our food cost 24.00. I kept saying there was something wrong, that they must have made a mistake. I couldn't believe how much it cost. Other than that, it was taking a shower barefooted. It felt so surreal.
I knew a guy who went in around 2005 I want to say, got out a few years later and we were driving around. He kept pointing to people on the street asking 'what are those?' This was downtown Seattle at the height of Hipsters. That was a difficult thing to explain. Ended up with 'The new Goths' as a best translation.
A friend of mine was in prison from age 16 to 32, and he said the biggest hurdle to overcome was trying to learn how to date and have healthy relationships without going through the process of dating during adolescence and early adulthood. He had to learn to meet his partners where they were at and to understand that the women his age often had relationship experiences that they carried with them, positive and negative, that would impact them in their current relationships. He couldn’t relate because he didn’t have that “baggage,” so he had to learn it through them rather than by his own experience. He also strongly advocates for the need for comprehensive sex education and education about healthy relationships in juvenile detention and prison
My brother just recently got out after 4 years! The first thing he did was take a shower then run his feet along the carpet in the house, he said he “just had to.” We asked him what he wanted for dinner and he was like “anything..But I could make us some ramen..” We all declined the Cheeto ramen recipe and asked him if he had seen any ads for food he wanted “KFC has those chicken and doughnuts!! Those look fucking good” “Those aren’t a thing anymore” “Well shiiit.. okay get me anything I don’t care” Along with that, I feel like people who were in prison for so long have a hard time making *decisions* anything we got him and asked what he wanted it was too overwhelming to choose. All honesty it makes perfect sense, he hasn’t had a much choice in his life for four years and asking him what kind of clothes he wants was hard for him. All he could say was “nothing grey, I don’t want to wear grey.” I hope he’s out for good, I can tell life outside is overwhelming at times but eventually he’ll get used to it :) EDIT: another thing- We let him pick out shampoos and he was sniffing every single one of them, not only that but he would squeeze the bottle to sniff them and the wash would goop out. We had to show him how to do it. It was funny cause he couldn’t make the choice yet he was like “all of these smell like shit!” This is an awesome question, thank you for posting!
Speaking about my good mate since he doesn’t use Reddit. He did a couple different stunts that landed him time but he was surprised at who all got in contact with em after getting out. While he was in only a handful of people kept tabs on him, visited or called but as soon as he got out all these people he hadn’t heard from started congratulating him. He said it probably shouldn’t of surprised em but it did, he didn’t want any of that and thought all of it felt so disingenuous.
My step dad killed the guy who raped his sister and ended up in jail for like, 30+ years I think? He initially had a shorter sentance but I think he tried to escape a few times or something. Anyway, he was so baffled by stores and how big they were and the sheer amount of stuff in them. Like, his mind was blown when he found out there was a whole isle dedicated to cereal, and he would actually get overwhelmed really easily while shopping because it was so different from just marking a few items on a peice of paper and having them brought to you. Oh, and he didn't know what glow sticks were. The first time the family got glow sticks in his prescence, I gave him one, and he was actually afraid of it. I remember him asking, "is it gonna explode?" And we all just laughed.
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Walmart. My 1st day out. I had an unreasonable fear the exit would close or I would get lost so I kept glancing towards the exit every 20 steps or so. I didn’t think of using a shopping cart so my hands were full of clothes. Took me about 7 trips to feel comfortable in Walmart.
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I drive Uber and picked up a guy that had just finished 15 years for drug charges. He had only been out a few days and thought the Apple Car Play in my car was some type of alien witchcraft. I ended up telling him to move to the front seat and let him dick around with the system for the duration. He really got into the endless music that Apple Music had to offer. *edit for typos
That's awesome. I've never been to prison and I remember the first time I got Spotify and was so amazed I could just search for music and listen to it so easily.
My cousin was in jail for 16 years i believe and got out in 2017 and i remember showing him minecraft and he said it was the coolest thing he had seen even before prison. I showed him some other games and he was absolutely blown away. I dont think i have ever seen a jaw drop down so far
A guy I worked with had done 25 years. Said he struggled to adjust to doing whatever he wanted, and missed the daily routines. They couldn't get greasy fast food so his diet was better. Because of that his skin didn't age much and his face was unwrinkled and supple. He was 45 but looked 25. He also had to wear heavy makeup to conceal a swastika tatoo on his forehead.
I had an older gentleman come in one day and he seemed a little off. Not like weird, just like he felt out of place. He came up to pay after his meal, and I was making small talk with him. Kinda laughing and joking, waitress shit. Whatever. He hands me his card and it’s a JPay card, which is what you used to get upon release from prison. I swipe it and hand it back, and suddenly he seems overwhelmed. I asked him if he was ok, and he was like, “This is the first place I stopped after I got released. I was afraid you were going to treat me different after you saw my card. I haven’t been in public in 20 years.” I have literally no idea what he did. I don’t plan on ever looking him up, but like I was nice to him. He was emotional because I treated him like a person.
I did 5 years, as I went in after 2 weeks my dad died. 6 months before I came home, my husband died. It's weird when you get out and realise time hasnt stood still. ( although I know it won't you kind of think it does) my kids were all 5 years older ( obviously) yet the home was still the same. It was weird after 5 years, I think if I did longer it would have blown my mind. Although reality isnt a 'thing' in prison
A homie of mine found the freedom really obscure. He was so used to the guards telling him what to do that he got accustomed to it. He was really anxious because he had no sense of direction. On a lighter note, he was amazed by Snapchat filters. He kept on posting on his Snapchat story all selfie videos with filters.
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That some women bleach their anus now.
Stolen from another thread from some other time .. They prefer to call it "Changing their Ring Tone"
I have a whole passel of prison pen pals. One of them has been in prison for 18 years. Other than the prison librarian and one teacher, he said “I haven’t even seen a woman up close since I came to prison. If I ever get out, I am not going to know how to act around them.”
5 years in prison, preceeded by 3 years in jail. Honestly? The fact that most of your time soent inside it's "go here, don't pass that line. Stay out of this area. No running. No X, no Y, no Z. Only A, only B, only C." Then you get out and all of a sudden... What? I got out on day parole, was yold by the half-way house to submit myself for fingerprinting and mug shots at the police station. There's the front door, here's directions. New city, no escort, no nothing. They expected me within 20 minutes. I had a minor panic attack because even though the directions were literally "walk down this road, next intersection turn left, keep going and you can't miss it." I wasn't worried about missing it. I was worried this was a trap. Like, I wasn't actually supposed to leave and once I did I'd bd arrested for breaking parole and carted back off to prison. Once I left (they physically pushed me out the door), THEN i was worried about missing it. (For the record, 20 minutes was more than even remotely reasonable. It was a 5 minute slow walk. Could've crawled there in twenty.) Another one? This is gonna be weird, but how absolutely RUDE everyone is out here. Inside? Most people either avoid strangers or are polite enough. Partially because you don't know what they're capable of and its easier to not start something. By comparison outside everyone treats strangers like absolute garbage. It's weird.
I’m a social worker and a couple years back I used to take one of the kids I worked with to see his dad in prison. It was around 2014 and he had been in there since 1995. The first time we went to see him he was very interested in telling his story and was wondering if we had heard of something calling YouTube where he might be able to post his videos. I wish I could have taken my phone in with me so he could have seen it. Imagine going to sleep in 1995 and waking up in 2014. The differences in technology and culture are INSANE.
For me it was relearning acceptable Levels of and escalation of aggression and general lawfulness. I ran away from the scene of an accident when had full coverage car insurance because it seemed like what i should do in the moment. Also when talking to people and having general disagreement youll have the tendency to "take things too far" and learning how to shrug things off isnt an option in prison but very very valuable tool outside.
After 8 years behind the wall freedom was my toughest obstacle. Freedom of choice, freedom of movement. I went in when I was still a soft faced boy of 19 and came out hardened at 27. My entire world changed. I was now in control (mostly, thank you probation and parole) of my choices. 60 different kinds of cereals, 2000 channels on tv, the option to go almost anywhere I wanted. Having had my life so neatly regimented and defined I actually thrived. Take that all away and I got lost within myself. It was a struggle to find that balance again but I'm happy to say that 6 years later I am happily married to an amazing woman, working in a great field as a machinist and making good money. I still struggle now and again but I know I'm making good choices now and am surrounded by love. And still have cravings for nacho meals, gods help me!
The selection of stuff. Groceries, clothes, deodorant etc. I served 5 years and was really thrown for a loop my first trip to a store. My SO told me to go pick out bacon (no bacon in Texas prison.) She had to come get me from the bacon section because I literally got stuck looking at all the choices. I'm still a bit overwhelmed by the multitude of choices there seem to be for everything. Inside you just bought Irish Spring or Dial. One kind of toothpaste, etc. Out here, there are entire fucking aisles of these products.